ByElizabeth Hours Updated
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Thursday’s Workwear Report: Tweed Pencil Skirt with Fringe

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Our daily workwear reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices. This fringed tweed skirt looks really polished, but the bright color makes it seem fresh and young. If you’re trying to channel your inner Elle Woods, there’s also a matching moto jacket. For me, the trick to wearing a bright color like this one is to pair it with something classic and neutral. I love it with the chambray button-down pictured here, but the denim look can be too casual for some offices. I would wear it with an ivory short-sleeved sweater and a navy cardigan or blazer.  The skirt is $98 and comes in regular sizes 0–16, petite sizes 0–12, and tall sizes 2–16. It also comes in black and a really pretty hunter green. Tweed Pencil Skirt with Fringe This post contains affiliate links and Corporette® may earn commissions for purchases made through links in this post. For more details see here. Thank you so much for your support! Seen a great piece you’d like to recommend? Please e-mail tps@corporette.com.

Sales of note for 3/21/25:

  • Nordstrom – Spring sale, up to 50% off: Free People, AllSaints, AG, and more
  • Ann Taylor – 25% off suiting + 25% off tops & sweaters + extra 50% off sale
  • Banana Republic Factory – 40% off everything + extra 20% off
  • Eloquii – $39+ dresses & jumpsuits + up to 50% off everything else
  • J.Crew – 25% off select linen & cashmere + up to 50% off select styles + extra 40% off sale
  • J.Crew Factory – Friends & Family Sale: Extra 15% off your purchase + extra 50% off clearance + 50-60% off spring faves
  • M.M.LaFleur – Flash Sale: Get the Ultimate Jardigan for $198 on sale; use code CORPORETTE15 for 15% off
  • Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
  • Talbots – Buy 1 get 1 50% off everything, includes markdowns

And some of our latest threadjacks here at Corporette (reader questions and commentary) — see more here!

Some of our latest threadjacks include:

260 Comments

      1. I agree. Elizabeth really knows her nice clothing! And, as a young 34 year old attorney at law, she likely still has a very nice figure. Hopefully Elizabeth exercises regularly so that she won’t wind up with a lawyer’s tuchus like many of us slightly older attorney’s at law who sit at our desks all day doing legal research and writing in front of our computer screens. FOOEY!

      1. Eh, hit or miss. Items that are 100% silk, cotton, merino, or cashmere seem to be doing OK still. Blends like most sweaters pill just looking at them. Linens and tweeds either look fantastic or surprisingly cheap in person. Might be worth a gamble to order this skirt, because the color is awesome.

      2. I just ordered the wool no.2 pencil skirt and quality is back up to the old days (yay! I love those skirts). Other items were more hit and miss (the wool regent blazers were cheap and awful, but some of the tops are good quality lately). Not as fool-proof as in the past, but honestly I am shocked I haven’t returned every.single.thing I bought as I used to.

      3. I’ve been wearing their Cameron slim crop in 4 season stretch and I love them – especially that they’re a suiting-type fabric but machine washable. I also enjoy their 365 tops that are meant to go under blazers or cardigans. Stretchy, easy.

    3. Ooh, I love it in green too. It’s slightly more subdued as a whole suit but each piece would be lovely as part of a work or party outfit through the winter

    4. Me, too! I probably wouldn’t wear a pink suit, but love the fringe on the skirt and the pink moto jacket.

    6. And it comes in tall sizes! I’m over the moon. Nearly bought the full suit in green but ultimately went for black because I really need more basic suiting (to the extent this can be described as basic suiting even in the black…)

    7. I could not pull this off, but the fact that it’s out there in the world makes me happy.

    8. Love this! The pink is sold out in my size, which is probably just as well because I already have a suit in that color.

      So I bought it in green! :)

      1. I’m off tomorrow, so I may go by the store (have to go to the mall to return something). I have no idea what my size would be!

  2. Thank you to whoever suggested the Karen Scott blazer / cardigan thing (believe it was In-House Houston). I bought it in the purple and navy for $25 each on sale from Macy’s. I wore it for family photos and it looked polished and they came great. I think it will be a workhorse this fall for me. Very grateful!!

      2. Is this the one? https://www.macys.com/shop/product/karen-scott-open-front-cardigan-created-for-macys?ID=8944388&CategoryID=260#fn=BRAND%3DKaren%20Scott

        Also, on sale for $20:

        Open-work cardigan: https://www.macys.com/shop/product/karen-scott-shawl-collar-cardigan-created-for-macys?ID=8949242&CategoryID=260#fn=BRAND%3DKaren%20Scott

        And longer length: https://www.macys.com/shop/product/karen-scott-open-front-cardigan-created-for-macys?ID=8944386&CategoryID=260&swatchColor=Espresso%20Roast#fn=BRAND%3DKaren%20Scott

      1. For me it runs large. I usually wear a size medium on top and I was seriously considering buying an XS except it was too tight in the arms. I took a small.

    4. I’m so glad you and so many others liked it. I have 3 now. I’ve washed one and it came out nice. I put it in the drawer for just a few minutes (5) and hug it up. Had to steam it just a little. I think it’s a great buy and staple (and the price keeps coming down!)

    5. Ugh. I just dropped mine in the UPS box to return today. I so wanted it to work. I’m a 1X but can sometimes do an XL or XXL. I got the XL and it was too small and I don’t think the XXL would work either. The shawl color came up really high on my neck and it was also super long in the arms. I’m short so I can deal with an extra inch or too, but there was a solid 4 inches of extra fabric. I would try again in plus sizes but for the extra long sleeves. I’m so bummed, I so wanted it to work out!

    2. Or, there’s Halloween sorted!

      (I absolutely love it, could never pull it off together but may buy the skirt separately.)

  5. Help out a first-time Uber user! (I drive everywhere at home, and recent trips I’ve been in regions without uber.) I have simple questions like, Do you usually sit in the front or back seat? Is there a customary tip amount? anything else I should know?

    1. I always sit in the back. You can tip through the app after the ride is finished. I tip $2-3 depending on the length of the ride and the quality of driver. Make sure you get in the right car, check the car model and license plate in the app. The driver is also supposed to confirm your identity when you get in the car but sometimes they don’t.

    2. I always sit in the back. I tip 15-20% (minimum $2) depending on the quality of the ride.
      I use Lyft over Uber, since it’s pretty well known that Uber is a terrible place to work, especially as a woman (I think they could both treat their drivers better but Lyft isn’t any worse on that front).

      3. I agree, though I tip more when I take a bunch of extra time (installing car seats for airport runs—even a good system isn’t exactly zippy).

        I always use Lyft when I can instead of Uber, more because the board seems either like it can’t or doesn’t care to ensure management behaves anywhere near appropriately. The story of the executive who carried around and widely talked about the medical files of a passenger who was raped by a driver in India was one of the many stories of inexcusable behavior that stuck with me.

      4. I have tried to use Lyft but it seems to take a lot longer to get a Lyft car than an Uber, and sometimes I don’t have that kind of time so I give up and switch to Uber. Then the Uber arrives and they have both Lyft and Uber stickers. It seems like the dual drivers hold out for an Uber fare. (I’m in the Bay Area)

    3. Sit in the back. Verify the license plate, driver photo before getting in the car. You can tip through the app. Sometimes the driver may call you if they need additional clarification on where to pick you up.

      1. Agreed. Rosa knows about a local woman who was picked up late at night by a guy pretending to be an Uber to get a ride back to Weschester, but the guy pulled over and tried to assault her $exueally. When she screamed at him, he took her to her home, and then called her local police and got him arrested. You can’t be to careful with these guys. FOOEY on them!

    5. Lyft and Uber both have functions to share your ride with someone, if you want to be safe or are going home after drinking. Also, get a reference code from someone! Both of you will get a little bit of credit. I frequently check both to compare prices – during busy times there is surge pricing where it’s +2x the regular rate.

      1. Is it really safer to share rides? It seems to me that men who are sharing a ride with you are just as likely to assault you as they are to protect you, but maybe I’m wrong about that.

        1. It’s not safer, I would argue opposite. Co passengers are not subject to background check. Drivers are.

        2. No by sharing your ride she’s referring to a feature that basically lets you share with a friend when you’re getting in the uber your location and when you arrive home.

        3. Abby might have meant that you can share your geographic location with someone else via your phone.

        4. I think the poster means that you should use the feature called “Share Your Ride”, which shares your location with a friend. My friends and I do this a lot because you can see the ride as it’s going and know when your friend is dropped off safely.

          There is something called Uber Pool, which is an actual shared ride with a stranger, which I’ve never done but would not recommend for the reasons above.

          1. I’ve done shared Lyfts and Ubers tons of times and it’s totally fine. It’s really common in NYC where it can save a lot of money.

          2. I live in DC and find uber pool to always be more annoying than the couple of bucks it saves.

          3. I’ve done Pool a lot in the Bay Area, and really have had no issues. It’s pretty common. Everyone ignores each other for the most part. It seems to me the safety factor is mitigated by the third party driver also being present, but you know your own risk tolerance.

            Whether it’s worth it is another question. They’re currently really pushing the Pool option where they pick you up and drop you off within a few block radius you need to walk to/from, that I don’t find worth it. But lately I’ve found if I toggle to the old Pool model you are barely saving vs doing a ride by yourself, bc I think they are really pushing this new radius model.

        5. Whoops yea, I didn’t mean sharing a ride with another human, just sharing the GPS of the uber with a friend!

        6. She’s not referring to carpool options like Uber Pool – both apps have “follow my ride” features to share your ride tracking with a trusted friend, so that person can watch your dot to make sure you get home. I got a creepy driver (asking very strange personal questions) coming home after a late flight a couple months ago and sent the tracking out to a group of my friends, with a “hey, if you’re up, please text with me and make sure I don’t get murdered”. I was fine, but definitely told the guy I’m married to a big tall crossfit guy (I’m not married).

          1. On that note, remember that the drivers aren’t closely supervised. If the driver is behaving in a creepy manner or seems under the influence or too tired to drive, it’s a good idea not to get in and report through the app (and if you’re concerned about safety on the road, also call the police).

          2. This is good advice, but unfortunately you can’t predict creepy like you can detect drunkenness. In my case, he was not outwardly any different than any other driver, especially as many drivers in my city are immigrants, and he was not inebriated in any way. 99 times of 100 I’ve had a totally normal ride. I did give a 1 star rating and report it through the app later, given the specificity of what he was asking making me feel uncomfortable and unsafe. My friends were notified and I knew one of my condo neighbors would be home, if I had felt in danger and couldn’t get ahold of anyone, I would have pulled up the panic button in the app.

    6. I also have a newbie Uber question – is it possible to send an Uber to pick up someone else? I promised a friend I would pick him up from the airport but now it looks like I’ll have to work. His flight is two weeks away so he totally understands the change of plans and wouldn’t expect me to figure out/pay for his transportation, but I’d like to offer anyway. Can I do this through Uber or do I have to find a car service?

      2. I think it would be hard to do this because of variables in timing getting off a plane (delays, where in the plane you are, did they check a bag?), and an Uber won’t sit around waiting, and/or ding your rating if they end up waiting awhile which could over time be an issue for you. Also, they really need to be able to communicate with your friend about where they are etc bc often times where you find Ubers at an airport are kind of random, and I don’t know if they can do that easily if they didn’t book.

        In general though, you could in theory I think send an Uber to pick someone up in a less variable/confusing situation (like pick up your mom at her home where she will be ready and waiting and there won’t be confusion where she is).

        1. This. Airport pickups are really hard even if you’re the one calling the ride share. I wouldn’t recommend it in this situation but it can work in a simpler case.

          1. Yeah, I wasn’t paying attention to the context. I’ve sent Lyfts to pick people up in simpler contexts. For airport pickup I’d do a car service.

  6. I recently started driving to work, and am wondering if anyone can suggest a driving shoe. My typical work flats aren’t doing the trick; I feel like the pointy toe gets in the way and the leather is rubbing off of the heel. Can you recommend a slip-on shoe to drive in that I won’t be embarrassed to walk through the lobby wearing? TIA!

    P.S. LOVE the pink suit.

    2. I drive in my Rothys (and often use for going out for lunch if it is wet / rainy or wearing skinny heels that get caught in paver gaps). I change into real shoes that I keep under my desk.

      2. I drive in Rothys too. I change out of them in the parking garage, unless I am having a casual dress day.

    3. I wear sneakers or cheap slip-ons from Walmart in the car. I keep my work shoes in the car and switch before going into my building.

    6. For my work commute, I drive in whatever flat shoe I’m wearing that day. For longer drives to court, etc., I wear birks in the summer and ugg slippers in the winter.

    7. With the exception of sneakers with laces, which are a hassle to get off and don’t bother me while driving, I always take off my shoes to drive and recommend it as the simplest solution!

  8. I found out earlier this week my SO has been having an emotional affair with a close friend. It veered into the physical a few times while drinking, with a kiss. I’m absolutely devastated and still trying to work through what comes next. I worked from home yesterday, so if I broke down at least it would be in the comfort of my (well, my parent’s) home. But I have to be in today. And it is taking everything in me not to fall apart. Tips for making it through today and tomorrow so I can get to the weekend to hibernate and lick my wounds?

    1. Is there any way you can call in sick? The weekend is only 2 days away. Or ask to leave early today? You’re not likely to get much work done anyway, and you can come back on Monday recharged.

    2. I’m so sorry, hugs. I haven’t dealt with this specifically, so I’m sure others may have better advice, but I did have a really rough few days at work last year I had to get through. See if a close coworker can run interference for you. Close your door or seek out a private/quiet room when possible. If anyone asks what’s going on, “a migraine is forming” worked for me. My coworker deflected a few people who were coming by to chat or with banal stuff. Put on a mask and be an actor for any meetings (not great long-term advice but it can get you through one or two days).

    3. All you need to do is make it through the next hour and the hour after that. If it gets to bad, fake a stomach issue and leave. And kick him out- you get to stay where you live.

      1. IDK re kicking another person out, esp. if you are both on the lease / co-own where you live.

        It’s great on a telenovela, but I’m not sure that flies, legally. Plus, some of us can’t afford where we live unless we’re splitting the cost :(

        1. Devastated can certainly kick her SO out while she licks her wounds and decides what is next for the relationship.

          2. Can she though? I feel like the person who wants to end the relationship or take a break in the relationship has to do the physical leaving. What if he just says, nope, I’m not leaving? How do force someone to move out, even temporarily? He did a bad thing for sure but you can’t make him move out because of it.

          3. I think the premise of the kicking the partner out advice is that the cheating partner has a shred of decency and will give OP some space for a little while if OP asks. It seems like the least the partner can do is to crash with friends/family or get a hotel or airbnb for a bit.

    4. So sorry to hear that. As someone who gets migraines, they’re a really good sick day excuse because you don’t look outwardly sick when you have them and they can be extremely debilitating and really interfere with your ability to do anything except lie in the dark. And they can last a few days. I would totally claim you’ve got one and head home.

      1. “I haven’t had one in years, it’s very strange.”
        “Yes, I know it’s my second one this month. I’ll have to go to the doctor if it keeps happening!”

        Carefully not overusing this got me through my divorce.

      2. You might also try “it might be a bug or something I ate” because after that no one wants to hear about your stomach troubles.

  9. I thought you all would enjoy this… I was poking around Nordstrom and saw a new skirt from Boss. I really love the skirt, I’m definitely going to sale stalk it. Then I scrolled down to the “Looks” section and… oh my. I’m truly flabbergasted. I don’t always like the recommended look, but it’s usually at least in the ballpark. A person can’t have put this together, right? It must be some misguided algorithm?

    https://shop.nordstrom.com/s/boss-veljana-tweed-business-skirt/5403047?origin=coordinating-5403047-0-4-PDP_2-recbot-new_arrival_category_brand&recs_placement=PDP_2&recs_strategy=new_arrival_category_brand&recs_source=recbot&recs_page_type=product&recs_seed=5314988

    2. That’s… that’s not in the shirts department, right? They strayed into lingerie? [clutches pearls]

    3. I don’t get it — aside from the “shirt,” I don’t understand a $1600 bag with $200 high heel slides. Shouldn’t one’s bag and shoes be roughly equivalent, cost-wise? I feel that a bag may cost slightly more, but not 8x more than the shoes I usually wear.

      And when I think Boss, I think Queen Letizia, not some random tart-wear paired with it.

      2. I have to disagree. Designer bags are generally much more than shoes, although somewhat dependent on style. I have a couple of bags that cost $2-3K but I have only once spent even close to $1K on shoes.

      3. Whoops, is there an arbitrary rule about how much my bags and shoes should cost that I haven’t been following?

        1. Ah. I was so confused by the comments, and then I scrolled down.

          Uh, the earrings are nice.

  10. Can someone take a look at the Clarks Juliet Willow Leather mule and let me know if it’s trendy or frumpy? I’m trying to up my casual shoe game…shoes are not my strength.

    1. Honestly, these look very frumpy to me.
      If you want to wear these outside of work, you do you, but definitely not work appropriate IMO. But I don’t like mules in general, they are to “flappy” for me.

    2. I don’t love these, I think it’s the combo of a mule but with a heel. What kind of shoes are you looking for? If you like the mule slip-on style, I’d look for one without a heel

    4. I think these get you points for trying, but they’re not really stylish- unless the rest of your outfit, hair and makeup is perfectly styled and polished.
      Try the Cole Haan piper mule- similar look but much better.

      1. Perfectly stated. These are okay if you have picky fee and want to allude to a trendy look — but they’re not quite right. (It’s the toe shape.) I like the Cole Haan piper suggestion, and you could also look at Franco Sarto for lower priced options that are relatively comfortable but still more stylish.

    5. Target has a mule- in wide- that is very trendy. I’ll link back with it. I’m ususally a clarks fan and found the target one to be great.

        1. Thanks for the feedback and suggestions! I’ll take a look at the options mentioned.

        2. I had a pair of those over the summer in leopard print. Very flattering on the foot, and I wore them into the ground. Unfortunately the footbed wore out very quickly and peeled, but then they are quite cheap. I enjoyed them. They are a knockoff of a Madewell mule.

  11. I made the mistake of telling my husband how happy I was in our new-ish house (old house, moved in 2 years ago) and how we haven’t had any issues in a while. Well, our basement mini flooded last and we have to get our pipes re-snaked this weekend. No advice needed, I just wanted to share how I jinxed us!

    1. I can’t believe you didn’t knock on wood and forgot to throw the spilled salt over your shoulder. ;)

        1. Our first winter we left for the holidays, came back on new years day to find our house at 45 degrees…our furnace blower broke and our pipes froze in our kitchen because the crawl space underneath wasn’t insulated! Luckily (??) for us, our pipes are the expandable kind so we only had 5 other issues, but no busted pipes.

    3. Eek! I was just thinking that our house isn’t so bad…need to be more pessimistic, clearly!

    4. I made that mistake right before realizing the house was leaking in every room and we needed an emergency $17,000 roof replacement. I still love the house though!

        1. Someone posted about a $9000 roof job a day or two ago, and now a $17000 roof… mine cost $35,000 so I’m jealous! (40k with gutters added)

      2. Literally everything on that roof (including 3 layers of shingles and a lot of underlying boards) needed removed and replaced. And it’s a largish ranch, so a lot of roof.

    5. This thread has me feeling very anxious because I know I definitely am not saving enough for home maintenance. Ahhhhh.

  12. Is it normal for your hands to hurt after 2 hours of driving? Specifically, the knuckles/joints in my fingers started to feel sore/needed to stretch after the first hour, and by hour 2 I had to hold my pinky and ring fingers straight because bending them was too painful

      1. This. Try to rest one of your hands on the wheel very gently. Unless you drive 2 hrs on a dirt road or switching lanes constantly, your car should be going straight ahead by itself, with minimal tight gripping necessary.

        Signed, a 2.5 h commuter.

      2. Agreed. Not normal. Were road conditions bad so you were extra tense? Did your arms/shoulders get stiff as well?

        1. I probably was tense, traffic was really bad and kind of chaotic. Arms and shoulders were fine; just hands. I did a 2 hour drive back already (this was for a court appearance) with no traffic and hands felt fine! Initially I was thinking- omg I have arthritis.

    3. That’s a long time to hold your hands without taking a break! Google hand stretches and take breaks to do them. I am pp and suffer from a lot of wrist and hand issues.

    4. Sounds like golfers elbow- does the oustide of your elbow hurt? Theres a nerve un there for pinkie and ring finger.

  13. I’m meeting friends for a weeknight dinner while in Bethesda on business next week. Any restaurant recommendations (not too fancy)? Near my hotel (near the metro) would be great. TIA!

    2. I’ve had good meals at both Barrel & Crow and Passionfish. Jaleo is nearby and is a reliable spot as well (and I always like to support Jose Andres for all the good he puts into the world).

      2. Warning – I have heard that the True Food in Bethesda is LOUD!!! So, if you want to chat, not a great place to go

        Seconding Barrel and Crow and Jaleo. I like The Silver (across from Passionfish – not The Silver Diner), too, it has good, reliable food. Does tend to fill up with families with children at times, though, which can make it a little chaotic.

      3. Every True Food in the DMV is awful and you couldn’t pay me to go back to any one of them, unfortunately.

  14. This is just venting. I’m always cold in the office and am always using a blanket (and sometimes the space heater). It’s a running joke in the office that Cookbooks is always cold. This morning, the head of my department comes in and says he’s solved my problem and drapes an old *moving* blanket on me and says now I won’t be cold anymore. This guy is usually a huge germaphobe, but he has no problem giving me a used moving blanket that’s holey and still had moving stickers on it…ewwww.

    1. That’s totally inappropriate, wtf. Uninvited intrusions into a coworker’s physical space are never okay.

      1. Turns out he thought it was unused (not sure where he got that idea), not that that makes it better. The guy is not great with boundaries, so I normally steer clear of him.

        1. Sounds like another sleazebag who would wrap his arms around you to keep you warm if you would let him. I have some issues like this with Frank, who always makes any excuse to touch and squeeze me, even tho he is MARRIED to a nice lady. She told me he is all over her as soon as he gets home every night, so apparently, these $ex starved guys can never get enough female attention. FOOEY on men like these loosers!

      1. Turns out he thought it was unused (not sure where he got that idea), not that that makes it better. He’s a weird guy in general, and I usually try to avoid him.

    3. Ugh, that’s so annoying. I am also always cold, you have my deepest sympathies.

  17. Any loafer recs? I don’t love the current narrow/pointier toe (nor do my bunions!). TIA!

    1. I absolutely love the Naturalizer Emiline. They have a ton of colors, wides available, and they’re super comfy.

      1. Counterpoint to this, I have this shoe and it’s comfortable/does its job well enough, but I think the quality isn’t quite there and I don’t expect it to last. The inner edge (from heel to big toe) keeps collapsing and doesn’t seem very well-made.

      2. I also have these shoes and they looked like garbage after a month. Super disappointed in the quality.

      3. Weird, maybe it’s color-specific? I’ve worn mine (metallic) at least twice a week for probably five-six months. I car commute so just normal office walking.

    2. Banana Republic Demi loafers. the most comfortable work shoe I’ve ever had, I have the suede, I tried the patent and it was too stiff for me.

  18. I think this really depends on what’s popular and working in your city. I’d try Hinge first, and see if they have a solid usership where you are. My experience is that Match is completely worthless, I got zero engagement (I get a fair amount on Bumble and Hinge), though I haven’t been on it for a couple years. I haven’t tried OKCupid since 2014 maybe?

  19. My office is doing some reorganization. I will now report to a former peer who is being promoted, and she will report to my current direct supervisor. The re-org is overall a good thing, but I would love some advice on how to navigate the new relationship with my now-supervisor. She’s awesome and we’ve always worked very well together. However, there are some things that haven’t been an issue as peers, but that I want to keep an eye on now that I’m reporting to her.

    I’ve always gotten excellent reviews and am known as a team player, but my expectation is that I’m 9-5 unless there’s something unusual going on. That’s the culture of the office–my new supervisor is the only person who’s regularly on email at 10pm. She also sees everything as needing immediate attention, whereas I’ll step up the intensity when necessary, but take a second to evaluate before going into crisis mode.

    My now-grandboss has said that we still have an open-door policy; emphasized that she wants me here for the long-term; and told me she sees a similar promotion in my future. I also really like my now-boss and I want to make sure we maintain our current strong, collaborative working relationship! But I want to have a plan in place to appropriately push back on things if it becomes necessary. This is her first supervisory role, too. Thoughts? Advice?

    2. I’d say focus on the work and stop thinking about going above her before she’s even started.

    3. I’m in the opposite situation (sort of) – my supervisor left our office, I got promoted to her position, and now she’s back, but in my old role, so I’m her supervisor now. She refuses to take direction from me directly – she always calls our grandboss or someone else in the office to “make sure” what I’m saying is what she is supposed to do. We were quite close before she left, and it’s definitely straining our relationship. So, I would say make sure you’re comfortable with taking direction from someone who used to be an equal – certainly go above her if you need to, but don’t feel like you have to constantly go around her. Just my experiences.

  20. I head a team of 3 counsels in my company’s in-house legal department. We’re all given corporate designations in line with the company’s corporate structure (e.g. assistant vice-president, vice-president, etc.) and I can choose 1 of the 2 (equally ranked) counsels that I manage for a promotion.

    One of the counsels (Jane), has been with the company for a couple of years, has done well in the time she’s here, and is about the right PQE to be promoted. Jane’s on maternity leave now, until January, and has had a difficult pregnancy since the beginning of the year. She’s had to have her workload cut, didn’t take on any new projects, and has missed many days of work. In this time, the other counsel (Alice), has taken on Jane’s share of the work and projects in addition to her own, and has done an excellent job. Alice has 3 less PQE than Jane and has only been around for 1 year.

    Thoughts?

    1. All things equal, Alice will likely have a tough maternity year at some later point in time… do the right thing and give the good worker with more years the promotion. If you don’t, you’ll probably lose her later on.

        1. I took her point a bit more broadly: at some point, Alice will have a tough go of things. She may get cancer, need to care for an ailing relative, go through a brutal divorce, or any number of things that prevent her from kicking it into high gear. Ergo, you don’t give her a promotion because she has yet to have bad things happen to her and another employee has; you understand that these things happen and that all of your employees will eventually hit a slump.

          1. That is what I meant :). It would be/is terrible to be “punished” when regular life things happen, and when you’ve been a great employee for so long.

      2. +1 – give it to the person who would normally deserve it. Other women in your company will look at (and remember) how you treated the person out on leave.

        1. Give it to the one who deserves it, regardless of health or pregnancy status. If the one who had the baby is serious about working post-partum, she will do well. But if she wants to stay home with the baby, and you can tell she is looking for reasons to lighten up, don’t promote her. I got promoted b/c I am willing to do the time. If I were lazy or non-focussed on work, I would NOT have become partner. I love my job, so it all worked out! YAY!!!

    2. Has Jane indicated an interest in a promotion and/or before she left was there a conversation about her transition back after maternity leave?

    3. If Jane had good reviews before she went out on leave and you don’t give her the promotion, she would have a really good case for pregnancy-related discrimination.

    4. It sounds like, had it not been for her difficult pregnancy, you would have promoted Jane. While I understand that Alice has stepped up during this difficult time in Jane’s life, that doesn’t mean that she is suddenly more qualified for a promotion than Jane. Don’t hold Jane’s pregnancy against her.

    6. I’m not an employment lawyer, but aren’t you possibly getting into discriminatory behavior if you decline to promote Jane because of her pregnancy? You don’t say that she didn’t perform well when she was present, just that she missed a lot of work, which was due to her pregnancy.

      1. Yeah it’s actually really disturbing that you are even considering her pregnancy as a factor.

    7. This is the kind of case plaintiff-side employment attorneys salivate over. Jane didn’t ask to have a difficult pregnancy. Her leave prior to giving birth was almost certainly protected by both the ADA and anti-pregnancy-discrimination laws. Alice doesn’t have as much tenure or experience as Jane. The fact that she “stepped up” doesn’t mean she is more deserving of a promotion. If Jane doesn’t get the promotion, I hope she somehow finds this blog and posts here for advice – I know some great plaintiff’s lawyers in NYC who would be glad to speak with her. OP, please make sure you retain all your records for the eventual lawsuit or EEOC complaint that will ensue if you promote Alice instead of Jane. Also, I am sad that your firm/employer made you a manager.

    8. There’s a tendency to look at promotions/raises/etc. through a “what have you done for me lately” lens. It’s a pretty natural bias – of course we’re closer to things that are happening now, while it’s easy to forget the awesome work someone did a year or more ago. A good manager fights that natural bias and considers the bigger picture. How has this person performed throughout their time with you? Everyone has to step back from work sometimes – if you ding good people because the promotion just happened to come along when they had to lean out, then you’re going to lose those people. At the same time, if you reward a couple of weeks’ worth of good work, but demonstrate that you don’t care about longterm performance, then people will only give you good work in the months leading up to review time.

    9. Jane gets the promotion for all the reasons explained above. (Duh).

      Alice’s (short-term, temporary, but very much appreciated) extra work seems much more befitting of a bump in the bonus this year, if possible, as opposed to a promotion for which she is not yet qualified. Express to her, in person, how much you appreciate her stepping up and taking on the extra workload. Then be sure to put it in her review so that when she actually is ready to be promoted, it will be documented and remembered that she is a team player who will rise to new challenges and excel.

  21. Fit question for suits. It recently dawned on me that the size of the arm holes in a suit jacket hugely affects the fit of the jacket. I’m short, curvy, and broad shouldered, so I usually size up in jackets and get them taken in through the waist and arms. Even with tailoring, some jackets just look… off to my eye. Well it turns out it’s been an arm hole problem all along; the bottom of the hole is almost at my bra line and is nowhere near my underarm. This means that the jacket looks bulky/too big through my chest and doesn’t nip in at the waist or drape properly.

    My awesome tailor says this isn’t something he can really fix. Any recommendations for brands that have smaller arm holes even in larger sizes? Or do I just have to start getting suits custom made (ugh)?

    1. Can he take up the shoulders? That would also raise the neckline and overall length of the jacket, and maybe narrow the bustline, but it could make the armhole smaller. He’d likely have to remove the sleeves and lining altogether and reattach, which is difficult and expensive. But less expensive than custom suits.

      1. There is all sorts of shaping and padding in the shoulders of good suit jackets that would have to be accounted for. And it has the potential to really affect the collar. So at least as much of a pain as redoing the armsyce

    2. I find most suit jackets that are meant to be open (no-buttons) tend to have a closer fitting arm. Vince Camuto has a few like this normally.

    3. Have you tried petite fits? This seems like something that would be different in petites vs. straight sizes.

      Talbots has larger sizes in petites, I believe.

    4. I am wearing a JCrew Going Out Blazer in a size 14, and the arm hole is nicely placed for me. I am 5’1″. The blazer is the regular size, not the petite.

  22. I’ve seen a couple of comments here along the lines of – “I can’t tell anyone in person, but I just paid off my student loans/reached some awesome financial goal!” Do folks not talk about this stuff with their friends? I don’t tell anyone my salary or budget but I absolutely shouted it from the rooftops when I paid off my student loans. Am I a jerk?

    1. I told several friends and hosted them for drinks! I didn’t post about it on social media and I didn’t make a point of bringing it up to people struggling although if asked I didn’t keep it a secret.

    2. I don’t think you’re a jerk! I’m glad you asked this, because I had literally the same question. My friends and I talk about these things in pretty specific detail. Like my closest friends know my salary and I know theirs, and we ALWAYS talk about where we are on paying off debt/the light at the end of the tunnel. Am I a jerk too?

      1. Not a jerk. But I have never discussed my salary or savings with anyone other than spouse and financial planner. I have had people mention to me their delight at paying off student loans, but never with any specifics – I have no idea if they mean $2,000, $20,000, or $200,000.

    3. I am planning to pay off my private loan with my bonus this year and you bet your a$$ I am going to tell people. I am not one to shy away from talking about money, however. My friends will be happy for me, as I would be for them!

    4. I think it depends a lot on field and whether you have a similar financial situation to your friends. I told all my biglaw friends (and some, but not all, of my non-biglaw attorney friends) when I paid off my student loans. They were all people who were in similar situations and knew what I had been forgoing so I could pay them off, even if they themselves were not paying them off as aggressively. I didn’t tell any of my non-attorney friends, because I was making like 4 to 6 times what they did and none of them had that size of student loans to start with and they hadn’t paid off their loans.

      I still I have decades to pay on my mortgage, but I think I’d be less likely to tell people when that is paid off. As time goes on, we are all just in very different financial situations. But, give that I’ll be 60 when I pay off my mortgage, maybe I’ll feel differently about it them. If I was in a financial position to pay it off earlier, I’d doubt I would share because so many of my friends haven’t been able to purchase in our HCOL city.

      1. What is the point of paying off your mortgage (vs. refinancing or buying a new place with a 30-year mortgage) when the mortgage interest rate is much less than the return you can make investing in the market? Plus the interest deduction. I don’t understand this delight among professionals at paying off a mortgage when the alternative is using the money to make more.

    5. I think most people would share news like this with people they know would take it well, but not with a friend who was, for example, recently laid off and struggling to pay her rent. It’s a know your audience type thing.

      When I read something like that I just assume the writer can’t openly share it with everyone in her inner circle for reasons like that.

    6. I don’t think you’re a jerk but I get why people don’t always feel comfortable sharing this stuff in real life. I had pretty minor law school debt and paid it off my first year in Big Law. I didn’t tell anyone except my parents because 1) I didn’t think it was that big a deal to pay off $25k of debt on a $160k salary and 2) almost all my classmates and associate peers had way more debt and were still a long way from paying it off and I didn’t want to seem smug.
      Many colleagues and law school friends announced their debt-free status when they were fourth-fifth-sixth years. I assume they graduated with $100-200k debt and I was very happy to celebrate their milestone with them.

      Mortgage is different imo. I don’t know anyone who has announced when they’ve paid that off.

    7. I didn’t say anything to my IRL friends when I paid off my student loans. Sort of falls under that taboo topic of money, IMO. But I have seen plenty of FB statuses that “shout from the rooftops” that the person paid off their student loans, so you’re definitely not alone.

    8. It’s definitely a “know your audience” thing. Most of my friends know our family is aggressively doing the Dave Ramsey plan and on track to pay things off next year–SO excited! But due to the salary differences in our circle, they don’t know what that means numbers wise and we have not shared that number with anyone except my in-laws. The funny thing is that most of the loans belong to my spouse because I went to law school on scholarship, so people could generally guess around how much we owed.

      We would probably share if we paid off the house to a smaller group of folks who are part of the debt free community, but probably not to the wider circle of friends, again because of the money differences. Particularly because people can look up this amount and I never want to make my friends feel bad or envious.

      I should add, if you are in the thick of paying things off remain encouraged! Especially if it is consumer debt. Paying off our credit cards was the most freeing thing in the world and with every month our snowball picks up speed. It’s so worth it.

    9. No, you’re definitely not a jerk! I have happily helped my friends celebrate this milestone.

    10. Not a jerk at all, but I think A) people feel that talking about money, even good news like raises and paying off debt, is tacky, and it’s best not to share those details, and B) some people might feel like it’s inconsiderate or poor form to talk about financial victories when so many of their peers are still struggling. There might also be a concern in some circles that once you announce that your finances are in good shape, you’ll be expected to be more generous with money, because you’ll no longer have an excuse not to give, lend, donate, buy, etc. when asked.

      That said, my boyfriend threw a party when he paid off his student loans, so I’m not one to look askance when someone proudly announces such an achievement, especially if they went through a lot of hardship in the past.

    11. I posted it on fb and told ANYONE that would listen. I was so proud of my husband and I! It’s a very exciting milestone and means you have a lot more freedom to make decisions that are right for you, not just right for being able to pay off your loan.

  23. My two best friends and I would like to go to a wellness retreat the first week of May. Any ideas on where to go? I’ve never been to one of these.

    Requirements
    – We can only get away for a 3 day weekend and want to go somewhere warm.
    – We want a good place but doesn’t have to be super duper luxurious.
    – Good vegetarian food but no restricted caloric diet — that’s not us. Wine is a must.
    – Interested in fitness, bonding/fun, and perhaps a spa treatment or two

    Thanks!

    1. I’m interested in fitness. Fitness whole pizza into my mouth.

      I’ll show myself out.

    3. Rancho La Puerta? (which came up in another thread recently) Their normal setup is for a week, but they also have a half-week option. It’s in Mexico, not too far from San Diego. Highly recommend if the timing and location would work for your parameters. It has all the rest: warm, put together but not fancy, good vegetarian food, fitness, spa treatments, beautiful gardens and pools, fun activities.

  24. If I were in Jane’s position and you promoted Alice, I would leave. If Alice were an Alan, you might be asking for a discrimination complaint.

    3. She’s asking for a discrimination complaint anyway because the pregnancy is what’s making her reconsider Jane.

  25. Morning all, since the hive has been such a great source of info, would love any NYC obgyn/egg freezing recommendations. TIA!

    1. Gary Markoff at Lexington OBGYN but have seen other doctors in the practice, too. The office staff are nice, competent and not snooty.

      RMA NY, NYU or Columbia are good options for egg freezing and fertility treatments, in general.

      1. I go to the same practice but see Dr. Pochert. I’ve heard great things about everyone else there.

    3. Not sure of what your scenario is, but consider freezing embryos instead of/in addition to eggs. They have a much higher success rate of resulting in a live birth. Depending on what age you are when you freeze, the live birth rate is actually pretty low (or at least lower than what I had anticipated prior to researching.)

      Good luck!! I am sending you good vibes.

  26. My two best friends and I would like to go to a wellness retreat the first week of May. Any ideas on where to go? I’ve never been to one of these.

    Requirements
    – We can only get away for a 3 day weekend and want to go somewhere warm.
    – We want a good place but doesn’t have to be super duper luxurious.
    – Good vegetarian food but no restricted caloric diet — that’s not us. Wine is a must.
    – Interested in fitness, bonding/fun, and perhaps some meditation and a spa treatment or two

    Thanks!

      1. I’m in California, the other two are in New England. We’re fine traveling anywhere, just want a warm location to get away for 3 days.

    2. Canyon Ranch has a new place in MA or NH – I haven’t been but I’m tempted to try it. I’ve heard good things about Canyon Ranch retreats at the other location.

      1. Canyon Ranch is kind of weight loss focused though. No alcohol, which OP wants, and the food is very low cal.

    5. Grove Park Inn in Asheville? The spa is fabulous, and setting is gorgeous. May is usually a lovely time to be there.

  27. I recently discovered that you can bake in the crock pot! I have never lined my crock pot and I am mildly terrified of the plastic liners in various ways (single-use plastic concerns, melting issues, and plastic getting in the food generally). A few recipes mention lining with plastic or foil, the latter seems friendlier to heat. In any case, I use my crock pot almost every week for chicken. I clean it really thoroughly, with Dawn, but also “soak” the inside with vinegar + Dawn mixture. But I am worried about using the crock pot for baking without any liner because of its normal use (cooking chicken), but also worried (I have a serious phobia about house fires–yes, my counselor and I have discussed at length) about using liners.

    Any crock pot experts have thoughts or suggestions on this? There is some magical cinnamon monkey bread I want to try before the holidays!

    1. I think your normal cleaning routine is plenty, but if you are still nervous and you can run the insert through the dishwasher, do so for your own peace of mind. :)

    2. Just make it while you’re home the first time and see how it comes out.

      I would not worry at all about the chicken. Your crockpot will not have absorbed the taste of chicken, and it fully cooks the chicken so there’s no worry about germs or whatever. I wouldn’t use a plastic liner (yuck) ever, but if the recipe calls for a foil liner I’d probably do that because it’s recyclable. Otherwise I’d use cooking spray and no liner.

    3. Gently, your chicken is fully cooked by the time the recipe is done. If you are cleaning your crock pot with detergent, I don’t think you need to worry about food safety when you are baking in the crock pot. I’ve made mac and cheese and scalloped potatoes in mine after many meat dishes and lived to tell the tale!

    4. My response to “you can bake in the crock pot” is either “eww” or “why would you want to”? I bake a lot and can’t imagine what would go in there!

      1. Sticky “breads,” french toast, etc. Why? Because I don’t have many of the accouterments for baking (mixer, much experience, time–big law attorney with other time consuming hobbies, etc.).

        I’ve recently gotten into baking and cooking as part of stepping into digital minimalism and exploring some creative hobbies that are new to me, but see above regarding time constraints. Not sure how it’s different than something like a dutch oven, but according to friends who bake some of the recipes (like monkey bread) come out with better consistency.

        1. This inspired me to look up monkey bread recipes for the crock pot, and some of them look really good!

        2. A crockpot won’t mix and it’s not going to bake faster or better than an oven. The only thing I can think of is that maybe they’re overbaking things in their oven and it turns out dry? A crockpot would be moist.

    6. The germs from the chicken don’t stay in the crock pot after you’ve washed it, so there’s really no reason to be concerned.

      1. +1. I’ve been baking chicken and cookies in the same broiler pan for years and it never once occurred to me it’s a problem. And no one’s ever gotten sick.

  28. Speaking about NY, Match and OkCupid have been worthless to me. On Match, most of the users seemed to be middle aged and above men looking for women way younger than them/affairs. I’ve even gotten a message threatening my safety after I told a guy that he was old enough to be my grandfather and should look for women his own age when i rejected his message. Ever since OkCupid made the switch to be more like Tinder, a lot of the user profiles are not any more substantive than any of the apps, and the quality of men is also way worse. You do however have the option to filter by ethnicity or religion or education level, which some of the other apps like Bumble does not let you do (Bumble does not allow you to filter by race for eg).

  29. Can someone remind me which brands make tights that have the wide waistband/”yoga” top? Searching on dept store websites isn’t yielding what I’m looking for.

    Thanks!

  30. Also forgot to add that OKCupid in NY is filled with Indian men for some reason, so if that’s your kind of thing, it might work.

  31. Totally varies by location. Here, at least in my age range, OKCupid is all scammers. Have only met one person IRL and it was an okay date. Not worth it at all. Match took a really long time to get going, but now is in full swing and I’ve met lots of guys in my area and gone on a lot of dates. I don’t put a lot of effort into it, but it’s working. I would recommend Match, but again, for my area and my age range. eharmony (recommended by a friend) was expensive and a complete waste of time.

  32. Sunglasses case recs? I have large prescription sunglasses that I prefer to wear anytime I’m outside or driving. When coming inside, I hate fiddling with my packpack and case to get the case out and put them in and my regular glasses out, then reverse when going outside (transitions don’t work for me for various reasons). Is there a case that can be clipped to the outside of a backpack and has one handed operation? Like a squeeze tube or magnetic? My google skills are failing me.

    1. One year for Xmas my mother and law gave me a coach one- I think she got it an outlet. It’s something I never would have bought, but love using everyday and often think of it as “who would have known!” upgrade.

  33. I run a small firm and we fully cover health plan costs for employees and everyone is simply included (they can choose not to include their partners and kids I suppose but we cover them as long as they fill out their paperwork, no one has ever asked to be not included).

    When we were small it was a complete non issue but now we are growing and have more staff.

    We also want to attract more partners and have been clear that this is a family friendly firm and we have certain values that they need to be on board with to join which means they’re going to have to pay for employee plans.

    I don’t look to closely into our plan but it is definitely heavily used by our employees, some more so that others, but everyone does use it. We are in a country with bad/non existent public health care and no pharma or dental plans so this sets us apart from other employers.

    Obviously this is very valuable for anyone with kids (we spend over $500/month) on one person and less valuable to single people. Is this just one of those things you would just leave as is or something you’d keep in mind for year end bonuses etc which are entirely discretionary?

    1. I don’t know what country you are in- but in the Us I’m pretty sure it would be illegal base bonuses on how much you’ve used your healthy insurance.
      My company does several things to curb costs:
      – if you opt out, you get $100/mo (encourages people to go on their spouses plans)
      – high deductible plans, that you then find an account for the deductible if they get a physical or other proactive health action
      – in the us, a lot of times equity partners pay their own health insurance costs
      I’m sure others have other ideas.

      1. Oh lol my question came off wrong.

        We aren’t bad people I swear.

        Basically, the family people get a better deal depending on how you look at it (and more incentive to stay) because of how we deal with benefits. Their premiums are wayyyy higher than the single people (and we are happy to cover them).

        Was just wondering if we could give the single people a slightly higher bonus at christmas or something since our incentives definitely benefit family people more.

        1. I think that would be weird, and in the US it would also be discriminatory.
          Like I said, you can encourage people to sign up elsewhere or not sign up at all by giving a yearly allowance to be used for whatever other plan they use.

    2. Give it to the one who deserves it, regardless of health or pregnancy status. If the one who had the baby is serious about working post-partum, she will do well. But if she wants to stay home with the baby, and you can tell she is looking for reasons to lighten up, don’t promote her. I got promoted b/c I am willing to do the time. If I were lazy or non-focussed on work, I would NOT have become partner. I love my job, so it all worked out! YAY!!!

  34. Someone was seeking travel advice for East Asia.
    I have been in Bangkok, Cambodia and Vietnam traveling solo, then here is my opinion:
    “London to Thailand [Chiang Mai (5 nights + 1 night in elephant sanctuary) – Bangkok – (2 nights)] -to Laos [Vientiane (2 nights) – Luang Prabang (2 nights)] to Vietnam [Hanoi (6 nights) – Ha Long Bay boat cruise (2 nights) – Hoi An (2 nights) – Ho Chi Minh City (3 nights)] to Cambodia [Siem Reap (3 nights)- Phnom Penh (2 nights)] – London.”

    Hanoi is ok with 2-3 nights if you are not going to Sapa. Ho Chi Minh the same with 2 nights (I went 2 nights in a Mekong river tour) and Hoi Ann 1 night. I will go to the beach in Koh Rong or Koh Rong Saloem afther Siem Reap. But in generall I will focus in 1 or 2 countries if you are going only 1 month. Each time I have been there I went 3 weeks to each country.

  35. I met my now-husband on OkCupid in 2015. I used Match extensively…meh. At least for me, the volume on OkCupid meant more possibilities. Bumble and Hinge weren’t really a thing yet… And…. all of a sudden…. I feel old!

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