Suit of the Week: Veronica Beard

65 Comments

1. I know nothing about trading cars in; my family has always bought and driven into the ground. If I have an 11yo car with an incredibly loud engine due to “reasons the dealer can’t find” is it still worth investigating or is tradein more for newer cars? This one is a Subura fwiw.

   1. If that was the only complaint I would keep it after having a local mechanic have a look. The dealer is incentivized to steer you to trade in/purchase.
      Says the owner of a 10 year old car with 182K

   2. I’ve always traded in my car when I bought a new one, I just don’t expect to get much for it because I drive cars into the ground. But the used car market has been weird since the pandemic. DH’s transmission died in his 13 year old truck earlier this year and the dealership still gave him like $15k for it when he bought a new one (which is really just $15k off the price of the new truck, plus paperwork). I’d look up the blue book value as a reference point. You won’t get that number but you might get like 20% less than that number.

      1. I’ve always viewed the lower amount from the dealer as the price I’m paying for the convenience of not trying to sell it myself and deal with the paperwork. Always worth it in my view.

         1. I used to feel this way, but a dealer told me that my 25 year old Toyota (relatively low mileage, I think around 175k) was worth nothing, and then I sold it for $5k on FB marketplace. Selling it was extremely easy except for being inundated with messages about it — on the whole it was very worth $5k to me!

            1. Well I’ve never tried with a car that old, lol! Glad you got something for it!

   3. I would have an exhaust specialist take a look at it- muffler/resonator etc problems are probably not on the dealer’s forte.

   4. If the noise is the only issue, just take it to a non-dealer mechanic and get it fixed. The dealer wants to steer you to a sale because they get commission; they aren’t interested in keeping this car running for you. Cars are stupidly expensive and an eleven year old car very likely needs some repairs and expected maintenance, but should also have lots of life left in it.

2. I’m going on a double date with a couple I have very little in common with. They are both tech founders, and there is definitely a bit of ego / main-character-syndrome / Silicon-Valley-is-the-center-of-the-universe energy. Does the hive have any recommendations for having a nice time with people you don’t particularly relate to? Are there topics that are universally interesting or good for getting to know people on a deeper level? I know my husband values and would like to deepen this friendship, so I’d like to put in some effort.

   1. Listen to them talk. Think of how this could be a good mystery / Anthropology PhD background research.

   2. I treat these outings like ethnographic research and like observe the culture and ask tones if questions. Study them like a remote isolated community. It works because people LOVE talking about themselves and I’m not going into it trying to enjoy these people so much as learn.

   3. My rec for conversing with people with different interests/experiences is finding ways to ask questions about theirs areas of interest that are interesting to you. And – it’s an easy way to keep the convo flowing, as most people can easily talk about themselves. For instance (as a non-tech person), I might ask follow up questions about the product development/creative parts of their job, the unique/quirky characters they work with, interesting people they’ve met while working. And the old non-work standbys of movies/tv, travel, food are always good options.

      1. This. I actually don’t like the “treat this like a sociology experiment” take—that’s for people that you have to tolerate (yucky coworkers, relatives, etc.), not for people you’re genuinely trying to connect with. They’re people—asking about things that interest you and finding things that mutually interest them is how that’s done. Childhoods, food, pets, travel, how they met, how annoying HOAs are or what they think about x, y or z—stuff you ask anyone new where you try to find mutual connections.

         1. +1 – I also don’t like to prejudge people like that.

   4. People love to talk about their kids and their vacations. If you can tolerate either topic, pick one and ask thoughtful questions to get them to keep talking.

      1. When I lived in Silicon Valley, vacations weren’t a safe topic. Tech people would scoff at you for wanting a vacation. You’re supposed to want to work 100 hours a week for your start-up. Maybe kids are safer, no one I know was in that age of life yet. Although anyone working those hours isn’t exactly seeing much of their kids.

         1. I work in tech and nearly everyone takes epic vacations, so I wouldn’t say this is universally true.

            1. Same. This is a weird take.

   5. Sounds like a White Lotus series in the making.

   6. i think you focus on how your husband knows the couple and why he wants to be friendly with them, then look for common ground like skiing or whatever. going in with this attitude is a recipe for disaster.

   7. That’s very generous of you, but you might consider sitting back and letting your husband and others drive the bus. Be friendly and responsive, of course, but you don’t need to create an experience. It’s just dinner.

      1. So glad my husband and I play for the same team. The advice here sometimes is just mind blowingly off.

         1. Oh, for the love. This isn’t advice to be adversarial or to ignore your husband. It’s just not to work so hard in advance of a social interaction.

            The misreading here is sometimes just mindblowing.

   8. Is there an activity you could do together? Wine tasting? Go to a restaurant with a flight? Go to a play?

   9. Ask them if they’re originally from the area, and if they’re not, ask about their area of origin and how that compares to where you all are now.

      Ask them how they met. What activities do they do as a couple, what interests do they share?

      If worst comes to worst, pull out questions from the Colbert Questionnaire ;-)

3. how often do you waste time on Zillow? in your neighborhood, on vacation, general dreaming?

   1. My husband and I like to look at it together – sometimes we’re daydreaming about alternate lives we could be leading, sometimes we’re imagining something we might actually be interested in, and sometimes we are just making fun of houses together. We don’t do it too often, but maybe an evening once a month we’ll do one of these things. On my own, I find checking our home value weirdly reassuring, and I probably do that once a week or so.

   2. A lot. I like to have a general idea of what’s going on with real estate in my neighborhood (for no productive reason, we’re not moving anytime in the foreseeable future). Relatedly, I’m also one of those people who will walk through any open house in my neighborhood. I always scroll through Zillow when we’re visiting anywhere on vacation just to see. I feel like any good vacation involves a fantasy about moving there full time!

      1. Same here! Wish Zillow included international listings.

         1. It’s Zoopla in the UK.

   3. Almost never. I check our home value a couple times a year because it’s a decently big part of our net worth so I like to know the value. Beyond that, I don’t use Zillow at all.

   4. Not much. Every now and then I check out a house a friend is buying or one for sale in our neighborhood or a place I used to live, but after several nerve wracking years of keeping an eye on Zillow as prices skyrocketed and we got priced out of the city we lived in and had to move out of state to buy, I don’t think of it as entertainment, just a source of stress.

      1. +1. It was fun window shopping until I started house hunting in a seller’s market.

      2. Haha same, although I’m browsing pretty regularly… it’s kind of half dreaming (maybe, if I get that promotion, I could have something like someday? maybe, who knows, I’ll stumble upon something in my price range – ohh look! that one! oh wait that’s a parking space); and half kinda regret-rage-doomscrolling

   5. Never. I’ll check the realtor app when I see a new listing up. Or if I’m on vacation and want to dream about living in the place.

   6. It’s not my drug of choice but I love a good open house.

4. Any good formal work clothes, shoes, or bag finds recently?

   1. Absolutely obsessed with Bared Footwear who has their sitewide sale happening through tomorrow. I own so many pairs and love them!

      1. Ugh, I see so many I like! But trying to not spend money right now…

      2. How does the sizing run? I’m sometimes an 8 and sometimes an 8.5. The website says sz38 is 7.5-8 and sz39 is 8.5 to 9. Any thoughts?

         1. A little big IME

   2. I have been wanting a Demellier tote advertised here since the post quite a while ago. A couple of months ago the bag went on a significant sale and I pulled the trigger. It is great and just what I need for formal meetings.

5. I will be on a cruise next month in the Med visiting Mallorca, Sicily, Sardinia and the Spanish and Italian coasts. Any recs for novels set in this area? I have The Sicilian Inheritance on my list since I’ve enjoyed the author’s other books.

   1. I am trying and failing to read The Leopard, which is a big deal novel in Sicily. I read a murder mystery series set in Mallorca a decade ago after a visit. It was only average but I enjoyed it. I’ll see if I can find the name of the author. I’m also interested in hearing recommendations.

      1. I heard the movie adaptation of The Leopard is really good too.

   2. The quartet of books by Elena Ferrante might be fun! There are some trips to the seaside in them

   3. The Talented Mr Ripley by Patricia Highsmith.
      Loads of Agatha Christie short stories are set at the Spanish, French and Italian coasts. The one on the blue train is the French riviera.
      Annie Hawes’ autobiographical books about living in Italy are whimsical fun, the first one is called Extra virgin.
      Farwell to Arms by Hemingway and Name of the Rose by Umberto Eco if you want something heavier.

   4. Midnight in Sicily by Peter Robb
      (Mallorca):
      Lemon Bread with Poppy Seeds by Cristina Campos
      The vacationers’ by Emma Straub,
      The Regatta Mystery and Other Stories by Agatha Christie,
      Un hiver à Majorque by George Sand
      Beloved majorcans by Guy de Forestier

   5. The Queen of the South by Arturo Perez-Reverte might be a match.

6. why are so many dresses mini dresses, is a short dress that is 2 inches above the knee no longer a thing? also i hate puff sleeves, they make me look much wider

   1. I like a very moderate puff, something that tapers into my arm instead of just extra fabric flapping.

   2. I like a short dress, but so many of the dresses out there these days are so short and full that the proportions look off. A full-skirted dress that barely comes down to my fingertips just looks odd. The fuller the skirt, the longer the dress needs to be in order to look balanced. A super-short dress needs to be very fitted.

      1. Right? I’m short and these dresses are short on me. They look a bit . . . juvenile? I get that maybe people are aiming at 60s-inspired, but I feel very mutton dressed as lamb in them. I’m aiming for a Truman Capote Swan look as I go through the decades and this isn’t it.

      2. It looks so babyish! An a line dress that barely covers your bottom is a very typical baby girl outfit. Those dresses should come with cute bloomers.

         1. which is not appropriate for adults!!!

         2. Like the athleisure dresses in lululemon and Old Navy (everywhere): at least they all have built in shorts!

7. If an attorney lists both their office phone number and cell phone number in an email, which would you try calling first for business related issues?

   1. Office number

   2. Office. But also I’m old.

   3. Office. I would assume cell is for after hours emergencies.

      1. +1

   4. Office. Odds are it rings through to their cell on Teams anyway.

   5. Office. Leave voice mail.

   6. Cell, I like to reach people.

   7. Unless they specifically asked me to call in that email, an email gets an email back. If I was instructed to call, I’d call the office line first.

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