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Weekend Open Thread

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woman wears houndstooth blazer and matching strapless vest

Something on your mind? Chat about it here.

Strapless vests: yea or nay? I saw this item at Ann Taylor when I was looking for Suit of the Week and thought, HUH, that's a “know your office” item… but I kind of like the look for the weekend or an evening out. Add black jeans or maybe even a slip skirt and I think it could look polished but fun.

The top is $98, available in sizes 00-18 and 00P-16P.

Looking around, they seem to be a mini trend right now… Nordstrom has a few options from Favorite Daughter (black and pinstriped — and Revolve has ), ASTR the Label has one in brown, Bloomingdale's has one from French Connection in plain black, NET-A-PORTER has a pinstriped one from The Frankie Shop, and Aritzia has it in FOUR colors. Looking for plus sizes? This Amazon one or this Ashley Stewart one is the closest I could find, but you might want to check out Wildfang's corset (in a zillion different colors and fabrics because they consider it an MVP), available in sizes up to 3X.

Sales of note for 4/24/25:

  • Nordstrom – 7,710 new markdowns for women!
  • Ann Taylor – Friends of Ann Event: 30% off your entire purchase, including 100s of new arrivals
  • Banana Republic Factory – Up to 50% off everything + extra 25% off
  • Boden – 25% off everything (ends 4/27) (a rare sale!)
  • The Fold – Up to 25% off
  • Eloquii – Spring Clearance: Up to 75% off + extra 50-60% off sale
  • J.Crew – Mid-Season Sale: Up to 60% off sale styles + up to 50% off summer-ready styles
  • J.Crew Factory – Extra 50% off clearance + extra 15% off $100 + extra 20% off $125
  • Kule – Lots of sweaters up to 50% off
  • M.M.LaFleur – 3 pieces for $198. Try code CORPORETTE15 for 15% off
  • Rothy's – Final Few: Up to 50% off last chance styles; new favorites added
  • Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
  • Talbots – Friends & Family Event: 30% off entire purchase, includes markdowns

209 Comments

  1. We live in an older rental apartment in California (Bay Area) that has an open-sided stairwell that is not up to code (there are no railings/guards at all, just a floating-style handrail). We are expecting a baby and need to do something to make that safe. We asked the apartment manager about replacing the handrail with something that has up-to-code railing, but she said “the landlord probably isn’t going to do that.” Is that legal when it’s an easily documented code/safety violation? She mentioned that another resident bought some mesh siding things for their stairwell when they had a baby, but I’m not sure I trust a janky home-grown solution…

    1. That’s ridiculous. In California you have the right to repair and deduct if the cost of the repair doesn’t exceed one month’s rent. I’d give written notice of the violation and then consider having it done myself and deducting from the rent. If you google “California tenants rights” or “California repair and deduct” you will find a ton of information online.

      1. And also? Managers are notorious for not wanting to do anything. It’s quite likely the landlord doesn’t even know about the issue.

      2. Would that “repair and deduct” option apply to a code violation that isn’t something imminently dangerous (like a broken heater during winter)? It’s weird because this landlord is usually quick to make repairs and I’m a bit concerned about entering battle…

      1. Maybe, but I’d be sure to get a full “no” from management and landlord before doing this, esp. as OP noted she is hesitant to do battle with the landlord.

    3. Is this a privately owned building or is it a large apartment complex managed by a large company?

    4. Is it older enough that it might be grandfathered in/met code when it was built? This probably varies a lot by city/state, but I thought most places didn’t really require apartments to meet new codes *looks suspiciously at my similar no-railing stairs*.

      1. In most places homes are grandfathered to code the time it was built. You don’t have to upgrade to meet code unless you’re renovating.

      2. Yes, definitely old enough for that to be a risk…ugh. Wish I knew the ins and outs of CA tenant law better.

        1. I don’t know that is necessarily true for a rental unit. My old house in neighboring Alameda county had to be brought up to code when we had to open the walls for a construction protect, but not sooner. It would have been different if we were renting any part of the house out, according to my contractor.

      1. Absolutely this. In writing. The answer to the questions you don’t ask is always “no.”

  2. Would you be comfortable regularly flying on very small planes (by small I mean like 6 seater propeller planes, not regional jets)? For years my small town didn’t have an airport and we would either drive a little over an hour to a non-hub airport and fly to our destination with a layover, or we’d drive 2.5-3 hours to a major international airport and fly non-stop from there. Our small town recently started commercial flights to the major international airport, and the local airport is five minutes from our house so it would be very convenient, but the flights are all on tiny propeller planes. I’m not worried about the price, just safety. I’ve flown on these kinds of planes a few times in remote island destinations but doing it regularly feels like a different risk calculus. We take ~8-12 plane trips each year so it’s a lot of flights cumulatively.

    2. it’s not the safety that would give me pause, so much as the risk that those flights get cancelled – a tiny plane can’t stand up to the same weather that the big ones can.

      1. This right here. I’d do it when possible (maybe not a high stakes work trip during storm season), since the only way for commercial service to stay available is for people to use it.

    3. That would be a hard no from me for safety reasons and for airsickness reasons.

    4. I don’t think they’re any less safe than big planes. They’re regulated, inspected and you have professional, airline-affiliated pilots, yes? I can understand if you just generally feel less comfortable on a 6-seater but they’re not inherently less safe as far as I’m aware or would logically conclude. I suppose someone could pull data and prove me wrong, but I’ve flown them many times and have never once wondered if they were inherently less safe than bigger planes.. You hear about smaller plan crashes more often because that’s what less experienced and student pilots fly (and mess up on).

    5. Assuming they’re operated by an actual airline with regular professional pilots, probably yes. I feel like most times I hear about these types of planes crashing, they’re being flown by hobbyists, not professional pilots who do it every day. (I too take these kinds of planes to remote destinations and they don’t bother me)

      1. As the wife, daughter, and granddaughter of pilots, this. Amateur pilots are more likely to overestimate their skills and underestimate the danger of the situation.

        Would this happen to be one of the federal government’s rural airport connection plans? I’ve heard great things from family who live near such an airport and they enjoy using it to connect to their major airport.

    6. Like where they use your weight to judge where you sit? Still yes. I used to fly some to/from Dallas.

    7. I am terrified of small planes, but I don’t claim that this is a rational fear.

    8. I used to live near an airport that only flew propeller planes. The reason their crashes don’t make for large headlines is that the injuries are more like what you see in a car crash. People still get hurt and die, but not all of the people on the plane and it’s usually only a handful of people involved rather than hundreds. And that little small-town airport had a similar number of plane crashes as the busy road nearby had car crashes.

      So no, never would I fly on a plane like this simply to save time.

      1. Yup. My mom worked for a major airline for years and told me that with small planes they’ve basically done a cost-benefit analysis and decided that because so few people die in each crash and a small plane crash doesn’t shock the public conscience the way a big plane crash does, they don’t have to invest in safety improvements the way they do for the jumbo jets carrying hundreds of people. Cynical, yes, but she refuses to fly on them even with an experienced pilot, and it’s rubbed off on me.

    9. I’m afraid of small planes, but less so if they’re commercially run and regulated. (Hard no on going up with a friend in their own plane.) I was recently in Alaska and realized how incredibly dependent they are on small planes there, and how I would have to get over my fear if I lived there.

    10. I wouldn’t do it regularly. Lots of small plane crashes happen due to pilot error. The tippy top pilots in the industry tend not to be flying those routes.

    11. Genuine question: what type of trips are you taking? That’s so many flights per year! To answer your question no, I would not go on those tiny planes. If frequent travel is non negotiable then moving closer to an airport seems better than risking death.

      1. We fly that much. Basically we do local stuff only on regular weekends but use every holiday to see somewhere further away (usually adding a vacation day or 2 to make the most of it). So… entry level for a year is-
        -Xmas break
        -Presidents’ Day ski trip
        -spring break getaway
        -Memorial Day getaway
        -4th getaway
        -Labor Day getaway
        -thanksgiving with family

        Throw in a longer overseas vacation and a wedding and visiting other family, yeah, they accumulate! But we live a half hour from a major airport so a quick trip is really easy.

      2. We love to travel and we have lot of long distance family. We take a weeklong vacation for every school break plus a couple trips in the summer, so that’s about 5 or 6 big trips per year and then we do up to a half dozen long weekend trips, mainly to visit friends or family – all by plane because we have no family in driving distance.
        Unfortunately we’re stuck here for careers but yea the airport access is the worst thing about it. We definitely plan to move closer to a hub airport in retirement.

    12. Yes, but I live in Alaska and it’s literally the only way to get to most places. The only time I get worried is when the weather is bad.

        1. I never would have guessed that this was a question from my state! My son just became a Boilermaker!

          2. Funny, I didn’t think so, but you could have been talking about my California hometown. It has an airport, mostly used by hobby pilots. The town is situated an hour-ish drive from a regional airport offering commercial flights, but you’d have to fly to a hub and change planes to get anywhere really, usually a connection in Denver or Salt Lake City, depending on airline.

            The nearest airline hub is LAX, a 3ish hour drive away.

            The local airport has over the years offered small commercial flights to LAX, but those tend to come and go because I guess the locals don’t mind either drive, and those small flights tend to be expensive.

    14. I flew on these planes multiple times a week in northern Canada for circuit court, and had no safety concerns – if the weather or visibility was questionable, the flights were cancelled.

    15. I assume you are talking about small commercial planes rather than charters or general aviation (operated by amateur pilots). If you look at the statistics, commercial planes are very safe – even the small ones. Private charters are somewhat less safe and general aviation is relatively risky (it depends entirely on the pilot and plane). Scary stories and anecdotes notwithstanding, flying a commercial plane from your regional airport is almost certainly safer than driving the same distance even if the plane is small.

      I find it helpful to think of relative risk rather than absolute risk. Is flying more dangerous than staying home? Obviously yes. However, the difference between flying with a professional pilot (even in a small plane) and driving is a very different calculation.

      And also to respond to another commenter, pilots who work small regional charters often just want to be home for dinner every night and sleep in their own beds with their spouses. It is a lifestyle choice. It does not make them bad at their jobs. (As someone who is related to a former Navy pilot who used to fly for a big commercial airlines and took a job flying charters and for a small regional carrier after he had kids because he wanted to actually be home for them.).

    16. Heck yeah, I’d be taking it. What a huge convenience. Frankly I’m kind of shocked be some of the responses so far, and they seem to be grounded more as boogeymen than actual data or true knowledge of this sort of path versus small charter.

  3. has anyone used the Soft Services buffing bar? They have a collaboration with DS & Durga for one of my current favorite scents (Debaser) so I’m considering even though pricey…

  4. For those who’ve been on safari, how many nights did you do at the safari lodge? We were thinking 4 nights, 3 full days. Does that sound right? Madikwe Reserve in South Africa, if it matters.

    1. We did 5 days and 4 nights (in South Africa, different reserve). That was great but 3 full days will be wonderful, too. Enjoy!

    2. We did 7 nights total, but spread out over several different parks (we were in Tanzania, not SA). I might go 5 nights, 4 days, but I think 4/3 is fine. 7 was honestly a little long unless you’re a hardcore wildlife photographer–we got animal fatigue by day 7 and it’s a lot of time in a jeep (Day 1-OMG a lion! Day 7-eh, another lion)

      1. Thanks! Yeah if it was just me I’d probably do at least 5 full days, because I am pretty serious about wildlife photography, but I’m traveling with my mom and elementary age kid, and I think both of them are going to get tired of it much more quickly than me. Even with only 3 full days my mom is not sure she wants to go on all the game drives and is thinking she may stay home for the evening drive and give the kiddo the option to stay with her.

  5. I have a Baggu small tote but I just got a huge stain on it and wanted to replace with something with many more organizational pockets anyway. Nylon, zippers, etc still very much wanted. I like interior pockets that I can see in vs zipped pockets or pouches. What else is good, washable, and medium sized? Not looking for a belt bag.

    1. Tumi nylon is such great quality, sewn really well, and easy to wash (looking at you bottle of foundation!). Spendy so I would scan eBay or poshmark for new condition.

  6. The lowest of low stakes excitement over here. I got into the Rancho Gordo Bean Club, FINALLY!! I’ve been on the waiting list for a couple years and got my notification yesterday.

    For those who don’t know: it’s a quarterly box with 6 lbs of surprise dried heirloom beans. I already have a small backlog from ordering regularly, so my goal is to cook through some of that before my first box.

    Anyone have any favorite vegetarian dried bean recipes? I usually just do whatever aromatics I have with a big scoop of veggie better than bouillon, but I’d love to spice it up some.

      1. Because they’re awesome!
        Seriously, if you kinda sorta like beans but don’t understand what the fuss is about, order a pound or two of Rancho Gordo beans (I’d do midnight black and Christmas lima, but there are no wrong answers) and make them. They are amazing in flavor and texture, so much better than supermarket dry beans.

      2. If you haven’t had “fresh” dried beans, these are a revelation. Fresh enough that for most of what they sell there is no need to soak. Plus, they have some very cool varieties you are not going to find at even the most well stocked grocery store.

    2. This sounds amazing! I love beans, both to eat and to admire just because they are so pretty.

      We make a bean dish that is basically cooked white beans (I think black eyed peas would be good, too), sautéed in oil with chopped rainbow chard, shallots, and thinly sliced garlic, drizzled with balsamic vinegar, and then eat it with fresh crusty bread. So tasty.

    3. Welcome to the Club!
      This is one of my favorites: https://www.ranchogordo.com/blogs/recipes/flageolet-beans-with-slow-roasted-tomatoes
      In the summer, I make cold salads with other beans, usually a bean, grains, onions, garlic, maybe some feta, oil, vinegar, etc.
      There are a few good rajma dal recipes kicking around the RG website and elsewhere.
      If you’re pescatarian, when you get lentils, check out Serious Eats’ salmon with lentils. I didn’t used to much care for either salmon or lentils, but that recipe made a believer out of me.
      Mostly I eat them just like you make, with aromatics and bouillon.

    4. This is my very favorite kinds of things to celebrate — niche, genuine, and interesting. Congratulations, and have fun with the beans!

      1. Cracking up – my daughter just alerted me to “dense bean salad” girl on Tiktok!

    6. Welcome from a long time member. Don’t sit on joining the Facebook group. There is a treasure trove of recipes shared there daily. And if you don’t have the Cool Beans cookbook, that’s a go-to for members.

      1. Agree, but also some of the folks on there are bonkers (I guess that’s social media for ya)! I will never understand the hoarding mentality of some- the beans are grown to be cooked and enjoyed, not organized and photographed!

        1. Oh, yeah, there is definitely a lot of crazy on there. But if you treat it like a Pinterest page for bean recipes, rather than Nextdoor for bean zealots, it’s very useful. Skip over the rest

          3. What a gift you have given all of us by sharing the knowledge that there are bean zealots.

          6. I’m probably discovering all of this too late, but I joined the Rancho Gordo “fan club” group on FB. Not the exclusive one for members of the club.

            This was a comment on the fan club page responding to a question about whether the club is worth it.

            “Practically speaking, the membership benefits don’t provide much new or interesting so if you’re approaching this from a practical standpoint you won’t see a meaningful $$ benefit. You may be happy just ordering as you have been and as long as you order more than $50 at a time, you get free shipping anyway. Bean club is for total bean nerds who can’t be reasoned with. Those who experience a Christmas-like joy when a box of surprise beans shows up every quarter. And their cats.”

    7. I just made some of their pinquitos (also known as Santa Maria beans) which can be really hard to find. I love them. I grew up with these kinds of beans as a side dish to something like (cover your veggie ears, friend!) tri tip, or as a main dish with some sort of chili type prep.

      So in terms of a vegetarian approach, I’d stick with what you’d do for vegetarian chili or Indian dal or black bean soup. I just made some white beans the other day & used half in an easy minestrone that was vegetarian and used up some tomatoes and zucchini I had on hand.

    9. In addition to the beans the Club sends you, you’ll get notices when limited-availability beans are for sale. When you see Good Mother Stallards, act quickly. They sell out fast!

    10. Thanks, Bean Freaks! I have joined the FB group, and I’ll keep an eye out for those Good Mother Sallards. One of the people in the FB group called us “the leguminatti,” which made me literally laugh out loud.

      I’m excited to try these recipes!

    11. Wow, congrats! I love The Moosewood Cookbook. Lots of really good bean recipes there.

    12. We got in last year and love it!! For those interested in a lower-stakes bean purchase, the Rancho Gordo combo packs are awesome

  7. Thanks to whoever suggested last week the Trader Joe’s Jalapeno Limeade for batch c*cktails. I had a party Friday night and decided to try it; I put a bunch of sliced strawberries in a pitcher with the limeade all day to zhuzh it up a bit and make it look pretty. People added tequila (or vodka, if they preferred) to taste, and Tabasco and Tajin were available on the side along with lime wedges. It was a big hit!

  8. Anyone have a recommendation for a magnesium glycinate supplement? I’d love something that’s third-party tested. My doctor is advising that I take it but didn’t give any brand recs.

    1. I have been taking Pure Encapsulations brand for a few years to help with sleep. The brand was recommended by my doctor.

    2. look for something with a USP badge on it (there’s another one i’m forgetting, i don’t think it’s NSF but maybe? I thought it started with a G) — i’d think i read somewhere that all kirkland brand is USP also.

    3. I went down a rabbit hole recently on supplements and it seems like Thorne is highly trusted.

      1. I had to get an unusual supplement my doctor prescribed for a weird neuropathy I have and I couldn’t find any versions with “USP” or similar. So I read that Thorne had supplied the supplements for some clinical trials jointly with Mayo clinic, I figured at least they were likely a bit more reputable. So I used the Thorne version.

        1. Yes, they are overpriced, and their marketing can be pseudoscientific, but checking which brands are used in legitimate medical research (not promotional research) is one way to ensure we’re getting what was actually studied and hopefully means the brand has a reputation to uphold. I think some of their vitamins have sports certifications too.

        2. Yeah, I am usually not one to overspend on such things, but in this instance I just really want to be sure I am getting what it says on the package. I bought basic vitamins from cheaper brands but for a few things I’d rather pay a dollar for the real thing than 10 cents for anything else. I expect it to be a short term thing.

    5. All major brands should be fine. If you’re unsure, buy something USP verified or NSF. Thorne is expensive, so that may be reassuring.

    6. I always default to Garden of Life. I read some Harvard study recommending them years ago and I’ve always been happy with their vitamins.

  9. what was your favorite show from the past that if someone hasn’t seen they should definitely check out? should i do gossip girl? call the midwife? luther? vampire diaries, ha?

    i would say buffy (it holds up!!), battlestar (the first three seasons are amazing), the americans, and the xfiles (also holds up, plus it’s fun to see all of scully’s bad suits).

      1. really? have you seen all the young kids being horrified at all the casual sexual abuse like the charlotte/blowjob episode, or big and carrie both just being horrible in general? i thought the general consensus was that it hasn’t held up.

        1. You mean the episode where a man tries to pressure Charlotte into a BJ and she dumps him immediately? That wasn’t problematic at all. That type of stuff happens all the time and she set a great example for dealing with it. Big and Carrie are horrible, but the show isn’t.

          1. This. It was eye candy. And I felt more Charlotte / Miranda resonance and Carrie was awful.

          2. I always felt like the friends were the split out components of Carrie. Charlotte was feelings and emotion. Miranda was intellect and brain. Samantha was sexual drive and lady parts.

        3. People talked about Big and Carrie both being horrible at the time it first aired! I enjoy TV shows with unlikeable characters. I don’t have to like everyone to enjoy a show.

          The second movie was awful and the reboot is not much better but the original series is totally a classic, imo!

          1. The reboot is horrific – absolutely none of the magic of the original. The original is at its core a show about female friendship and that doesn’t come through at all in the reboot.

        4. That makes me sad for the kids today. It’s one of the best shows ever made and it absolutely holds up.

      1. This is the greatest show ever made. I watch it once a year, my ultimate comfort show

        1. For any West Wing fans out there, I recommend The Newsroom if you haven’t seen it. Another Aaron Sorkin production, fast dialogue, smart passionate characters, a sense of cause — it’s all there. Got canceled after 3 seasons, unfortunately.

    3. For mindless comfort TV, there is nothing better than Hart of Dixie. I have no idea why it’s so charming, but it is charming! It’s incredibly low stakes and yet enjoyable.

        1. I have to go back and re-watch it now! But I hated the other guy – the doctor guy that was engaged to Lemon (who I loved/hated!)

          1. George Tucker, the lawyer! I love-hated Lemon too. Liked Lavon Hayes. I kinda liked Wade, or at least saw the attraction. And I loved Zoe Hart’s outfits. Need to go back and re-watch.

    4. I haven’t seen it since it originally aired, but Homicide: Life on the Streets just started streaming on Peac*ck and a review I heard on NPR said it has held up very well.

      Others I might like to revisit are Northern Exposure, St. Elsewhere and Six Feet Under. For a supernatural angle, I remember enjoying Dead Like Me.

      1. OMG. You have changed my weekend. Homicide is such a great show and the fact that it hasn’t been on a streaming service until now was a crime. I cannot wait to watch.

      2. I love this show so much. My MIL is pretty much Lucille (but without a Buster to torture which means she is unfocused in her rage) and they totally live in The Model Home.

      2. I love this show as well. So understated and a really good work drama. Lee Pace is also fine, fine, fine.

    7. For really light, I absolutely love Jane the Virgin. For funny(and especially now), I’d say Veep. For mystery, those first few seasons of Fargo hold up well.

    8. Mad Men, yes to Call the Midwife (personally I’d quit when Jenny leaves the series though), Seinfeld

      2. No no you have to watch the rest of Call the Midwife if you haven’t!!! I love the newer nurses they introduce and go through. Although bring tissues—I sob through almost every episode.

        1. I did (prob 3-4 post-Jenny seasons?), and thought the plots got to be “too much” as the series progressed, probably because you can only have so many varieties of pregnancy drama and the show therefore went for more wacky-personal plot lines for the characters?

      3. I’m looking forward to catching up on Call the Midwife again, but only AFTER I have my baby, lol.

        1. I have to say: I weirdly did a Call the Midwife rewatch while I was pregnant and it genuinely helped me through labor. I had some weird complications that I was not prepared for/had never even heard of from what I’d read, and I was having trouble understanding exactly what the medical staff was asking me to do. I visualized this one particularly wild birth scene from Call the Midwife and I was like, “if she could do that, I can figure this out!” and it got me through.

    9. We caught up on Person of Interest, The Wire, Twin Peaks, and just started Burn Notice (too soon for an opinion except that it’s refreshingly fast paced). Agreed on X-Files though not Buffy. We tried Felicity and it seemed retro in a good way but never ended up watching it (maybe we are too old for a college drama now!).

      1. Agree on The Wire and Burn Notice. Sharon Gless is such a gem.

        I’m watching Cold Case on Max (f.k.a. HBO) and I can just have it on in an endless loop. Takes place in Philly, which I feel is an underrated city (I’m from NJ, but northern, so Philly is terra incognito even though it was right there all along).

    11. Degrassi Junior High

      And if we’re just trading show recommendations, I am going back through Orphan Black from the beginning and plan to finish this time, then pick up the new 2024 series . It’s the only sci fi I have ever really enjoyed.

    12. I love Call the Midwife. Entertaining, and the show does a great job of modeling a healthy combination of empathy while not enabling bad behavior.

    13. Friday Night Lights

      Clear eyes, full hearts, can’t lose!!

      Just have to power through the terrible storylines (not all, just a couple) in Season 2

    14. Firefly (I will forever, as long as I live, be mad at Fox for cancelling it after 1 season), the West Wing, the X-Files, Star Trek: The Next Generation, Arrested Development (but not the Netflix reboot seasons), Scrubs, and Parks & Rec. Maybe Gilmore Girls, though adult me realizes Rory was kind of the worst.

      1. +1 permanent vendetta with Fox re firefly’s cancellation.
        Also agree Rory isn’t great but man Lorelai parentalizing Rory – I never got why the way she behaved was so weird until I was Lorelai’s age.
        I think we could be TV buddies!

        1. I loved Gilmore girls when it was airing but after watching it recently, Lorelei and Rory are both awful self centered people.

          1. the more I watch the more I’m Team Emily. She has her issues too, but the other two are insanely self-centered

    15. Since you’re good with X-files and fantasy sort of things, I surprisingly really liked the Castle Rock series on Hulu. Both seasons stand on their own. It’s not tied directly to Stephen King but occasionally there will be a reference here or there that a fan will recognize from one of his books. (Oh, “my uncle the writer is staying at a large hotel over the winter” sort of thing.)

    17. I’ll say yes to Vampire Diaries. At least through the end of season 3. It really picks up midway through the first season. It’s a ridiculous show and I wish I could experience it for the first time again.

      1. Thinking of showing that to my 7 year old in the next year or two and I can’t wait!

    21. Two ’90s British shows:

      Monarch of the Glen – a young Scotsman living in London doing his London life learns that his wacky dad has lost the family fortune and they’re about to have to sell their ancestral castle – can he save the castle, keep the villagers happy, and get the girl? Slow pilot, but gets cute. 5 seasons.

      The Vicar of Dibley – a rural, failing parish gets its first female rector – a warm and witty woman. If you’re a church-goer, you’ll chuckle and nod along at the parishioners and the situations. 3 seasons plus specials.

    25. L.A. Law got me through this winter. So cheesy, so 80s, but great characters and storylines.

    26. The Wire, Big Love, Derry Girls, The Shield, Parks & Rec, Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt, 30 Rock.

  10. The company picnic’s tonight, and of course I can’t decide what to wear. It’s a family-friendly event and it would be weird to dress up given the venue. I still don’t know what to wear. It’s supposed to be around 80 degrees. So far I’ve figured out that I’m either wearing court shoes or some New Balance vintage shoes. Would Athleta Brooklyn pants and a nice, not grubby, t-shirt be okay?

    1. Also, I am going to be sitting on the grass with my family at some point, so I am not considering any kind of skirt or dress.

    4. That sounds perfect. That’s my summer uniform when I want nicer than shorts but not a dress. I wear my Brooklyn pants with tees or short sleeve poplin tops all the time. Shoes sound perfect too since there may be activities.

  11. For those of you who finished PhDs, what did you do after turning in your dissertation? To celebrate or to mark the time between submission and defense. Also, how did you get over the post-submission exhaustion?

    1. It sounds like you just turned in your dissertation, and are wondering how to wind down from the stress of it all? And feeling at a loss about what to do now, that you don’t have the Dissertation consuming you?

      If so, congratulations!! It’s totally normal to feel a weird combination of exhaustion, stress, celebration, and not knowing what to do with yourself, at the end of such a long journey.

      1. Co-sign this. Mine was quite some time ago and I think I slept a lot but if I were to do it over again I would schedule an extra long massage and something that feeds my soul like an art workshop and maybe a yoga session. I’d also have fun reading the trashy mindless things I felt like I couldn’t do when I was trying to finish. If I had the kind of money then that I have now I would do some sort of wellness retreat. Congratulations! It’s a big accomplishment and worth celebrating in whatever way seems right for you.

    2. I went camping in Joshua Tree for a few days and took maybe a week off. And then I pretty much jumped right into a new intense project.

    4. Congratulations! The answer is rest — and do anything *except* work related to the dissertation. Read fun/light books; binge watch TV; yoga; small treats (manicure, massage, excellent dessert); big treats if you want to/can (a trip, a fancy-pants meal, new outfit).

      From my experience (a while ago, so YMMV), it was kind of anticlimactic, so it was hard to find a way to celebrate. So I just want to say here and now: you’ve accomplished something amazing.

    5. I am 20 years past my PhD graduation! After submitting my dissertation, I had a month until my job started; my husband was still in the trenches working on his diss. I went alone to visit my husband’s brother, who happened to be teaching close to Yosemite. This was a few states over and basically the only getaway we could afford for me.

      My brother-in-law worked by day, and I walked to a nearby park and read a pile of novels over the course of a couple of weeks. It was such a pleasure just to read something I wanted to read. We took a few day trips to Yosemite and San Francisco. I’m still close to that brother-in-law and his wife, whom he met right after my visit.

    6. Congrats!

      I wrote my thesis on a cross- country flight, so recovery was minor (my papers were done, so I formatted and added an introduction). But prepping for my defense was a lot. I slept, moved, then looked for a postdoc.

  12. I am just starting to plan a trip to Norway for next summer (July 2025). Probably 10-14 days with my husband and son (10), and we prefer to be very active. Would love recommendations, itineraries or tips from anyone who has gone before. Trip planning is my stress reliever, so bring it on…

    2. We just got back and did the via ferrata in Loen. We took the ferry from Bergen to Flam and then rented a car to drive to Loen. The Via Ferrata was the most terrifying and physically challenging thing I have ever done while simultaneously being very safe (you are fully harnessed and double clipped in to the mountain). I would highly recommend it if you are active and like a challenge! I’m not sure about the age limit for your son. The Hotel Alexandra in Loen was also fabulous and the website doesn’t do it justice. There is a huge swimming and pool complex with a terrifying and steep water slide (I bet a 10 year old would love it), divine breakfast and dinner buffet each day with so so many options. Great live piano at dinner and the staff was impeccable.

    3. It is so beautiful! You will love it!

      Pulpit rock hike – it is a hard one, and breathtaking-not sure if there are buses that go there, we went in a friends car
      Kayak down a fjord with a barbecue stop (this is a booked tour)
      Book any trains asap and reserve seats in direction the train is going
      We missed the Viking museum in Oslo- check open dates of any museums to time with the trip
      Eating out is very expensive, try to get rooms with a kitchenette

      1. The Viking museum is closed for refurbishment and a new build addition.

        For museums in Oslo, you want the National Museum and the Munch Museum.

    4. My boyfriend and I did a 2 week trip in March and had a fabulous time. We took the Havila ferry northbound (Bergen to Kirkenes), which we highly recommend as a great way to see the country and the fjords and still get off and do some activities. We then flew to Tromso where we glamped overnight at a husky lodge so we could do snowmobiling, husky sledding and Northern Light spotting (this was our favorite of the trip). Spent a few more days in Tromso and then flew down to Oslo for the museums and history. Obviously a summer trip would be different, but you could still follow the same route and just do different activities.

    5. We live in a city and wanted fjords and impressive scenery, so skipped Oslo with no regrets. I took 3 kids and it was our most favorite trip ever. We flew into/out of Bergen and did a week in the fjords, and then flew inner country using Widereo to the Lofoten islands. If you are into hiking, the Lofoten islands are not to be missed — we stayed at a rorbu in the southern part of the islands, and did some of the most epic hiking I’ve ever done. We stayed in the Reine Rorbu (bc I wanted access to an onsite restaurant, walkable grocery store and washer/dryer bc our youngest was only 3), but the most iconic views are at Eliassen Rorbuer or the lesser known Reinefjord Sjøhus. I wish we’d stayed at the Reinefjord Sjohus. Slightly less well known than Eliassen, but honestly a better view and bigger cabins. We went very far north up the Lofoten, but I didn’t feel like the scenery was as epic past Leknes (but far less crowded).

      For the fjords, we just did a loop, and I spent a bunch of time digging up yurts, glamping, and igloos on our route. The main Norway tourist site was a great resource.

      Pro tip — cell service was readily available, but the roads are STEEP and bendy and narrow. We are used to putting our overnight stops between 4 and 6 hours apart during multi-week trips, but I’m so thankful we were never more than about 3 hours from our next stop. Three hours on Google maps was more like 5 in real life.

    6. https://www.visitnorway.com

      If you do go to Flam, take the Flam train, and cycle the Rallarveg – a hairpin downwards route from the mountain to Flam, you can rent bicycles at Myrvoll.

      If you want to do any mountain hiking, there are several famous routes, so choose based on skill level and equipment. You might enjoy Jotunheimen from Gjende, the lakeside route is very nice, and the Besseggen route is good for people who like to walk on mountain edges.

      You should absolutely see some Fjords – do a cruise of some sort from Bergen or Alesund. The prettiest is supposed to be Geiranger, but most of them are nice. Lofoten in Northern Norway is great.

      If you’d like something more kid friendly, there are a couple of zip line parks on the outskirts of Oslo. Tusenfryd near Oslo is the biggest rollercoaster park. The biggest water park is in Boe. The biggest zoo and family park is Dyrehagen in Kristiansand.

      Several old railroad lines offer draisin railbike tours.

      1. A Svalbard cruise is high on my bucket list, but from my research it seemed relatively hard to combine with mainland Norway. The cruise ships that go there are expedition ships and don’t also cruise the fjords on the mainland. Of course, if you have enough time you could do both a Svalbard expedition cruise and a week or more in mainland Norway (either on a regular cruise ship or on land), but it didn’t seem to me like it would be a natural combination the way, say, Iceland and Greenland are.

        1. Norwegian here, and agree that Svalbard is difficult to combine with mainland.

          For any practical issues you can think of it as combing two countries. Flight time from Oslo to Svalbard is 4.5 hours. That’s more time than Oslo to Istanbul…

    8. We spent two years in Hamburg and my husband was in the international students syndicate for his program and the Norwegian officer is an amazing traveler. His posts of hiking and experiencing Norway definitely put it on my bucket list. He owns a gorgeous Airbnb and is a top guy. I really want to go. His English is perfect. https://www.airbnb.ca/rooms/960706420275141969?locale=en&_set_bev_on_new_domain=1724452763_EAYmVlNWFiYzYxMT&source_impression_id=p3_1724452763_P3Y-YtDrHdXlc_vT

  13. PSA: If you have outdoor furniture with Sunbrella fabric and it’s gotten dirty, this is the way to clean it: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4cR6_lV8fts I tried it this morning and my blue and white printed cushions were BLACK (they were under a tree and there was an insect poop issue) and they now look like new. I feel like a Master of the Universe!

    2. This is absolutely true. I found the same YouTube video last year and followed the instructions to clean my Sunbrella patio cushions. I’ve done it twice now and the results are AMAZING.

  14. A blogger who I followed on insta because I liked her blog back in the day just posted how she is sad Kennedy is dropping out because she truly believed he was the man for the job, and now I have to unfollow her because I’m questioning her judgement about everything. I know people can say whatever they want but sometimes ignorance is bliss.

    1. I think most influencers are not very smart. There seems to be a lot of overlap between influencing and people who are anti-vaxx and into conspiracy theory.

    3. This is a ridiculous stance. Are you really that afraid of hearing opinions and viewpoints that differ from yours?

      2. It’s not about differing opinions, which are fine. RFK is sharing straight up misinformation, and clearly is suffering from some sort of serious mental or physical illness, probably related to the worm that was in his brain. He’s had such a break from reality compared to how he was a decade or so ago. I live in a red state and I know plenty of people who don’t share my political opinions and it’s definitely valuable to talk to them. But Kennedy and his supporters are not grounded in reality.

        1. I mean, yeah, but I don’t need the person recommending paint colors to me to be sane. I need them to recommend good paint colors, you know?

          1. Eh, I get not wanting to give views (and thus money) to people who are parroting dangerous misinformation.

      3. Not the OP but I take a very harsh stance with influencers. They get political or post positions I don’t agree with? Gone. I’m not supporting them with my follow or click throughs. I read everything and very much am aware of all the arguments that aren’t opinions I agree with. I’m also friends with people of every political stripe. This has nothing to do with that.

    4. I just feel for his spokesperson, who was made to deny his endorsement for the former president, 15 minutes before it happened. Such a look of disorganization.

  15. Talk to me about aging cheeks/under eye area… after googling I think my issue is medial cheek? I feel like it’s below the area where I’d put concealer and more central than where id put blush. I feel like I’m getting a shelf or flatness there as I age. Is Juvederm the answer? Anything I can do for preventative care? I’m 46… no Botox or fillers yet.

    1. Do your research on the longevity of filler. It doesn’t go away. It just migrates. I get that aging is hard but I’d try to steer clear. You get face blindness to it and eventually have a pillow face.

    1. Lol, no thanks, I’ll just sew a bar tack with real thread and not get stabbed by the plastic tag all day long. We used those tools to apply little plastic hang tags when I worked retail in high school.

    2. I have this and I will say that it’s too flimsy to use for anything, the slightest pull and it breaks. Not worth the money and I wish I hadn’t fallen for the hype of more plastic crap. Honestly, double sided tape is probably a better fix than this.

  17. For those of you who donated clothing that no longer fit, did you go about replacing it with equivalent quality items, or shift to something else entirely?

    Longer version tldr— four years ago, before turning 50, I lost around 30 pounds. Over the last few years, I have donated more and more clothing that is now too big. I still have lots over ‘oversized’ sweaters and looser jackets, that I am keeping as they were tighter on me at the time.
    Throughout my mid 30s and late 40s I had curated wardrobe items that I really liked and worked together. For example, I had several coats ( pnw, four season climate) and last year, I finally let go of two wool blend coats that were well made (one older BR coat that I liked). I have replaced my puffer coat with one that is just not as high quality. As much as I would like a lovely wool coat, which I no longer wear as often, I’m wondering if I will ever have one equivalent to that again.I feel that I am giving away better quality items and it seems to take more time, money and effort to find new versions of these items. My lifestyle is also more active now and while part of me misses having nicer items just in case, if I didn’t replace some categories, I would likely be fine! My work is super casual, though always in person and I’m looking at retiring in the next two to four years. I can afford to replace items, but I’m not sure I should…
    Part of me is accepting of this shift, and another part of me is also scared of my greatly pared down wardrobe. I’ll admit that I’m also nervous regarding how many items I should keep if I gain weight throughout perimenopause, though I have kept it off for four years.

    1. A long time I lost a lot of weight and was delighted to fit back into some things I loved and had saved, only to find that they no longer suited me/were no longer in style. I think clothes from 10–20 years ago are, for the most part, not going to work for you any more even if they do turn out to be the right size again. So I say let the old things go and enjoy finding new things that you love.

      1. Agree, 10 years ago I lost a substantial amound of weight and basically needed to replace my entire wardrobe. There were some items I mourned — the perfect sale priced cocktail dress, a lovely expensive trench coat — but I didn’t try to replace each item with a like item. Syles changed, my lifestyle changed, my body had changed, I just used the opportunity to put together a more collected and equally polished wardrobe.

    2. I appreciate the encouragement and it makes me feel better to turn a corner and let go. I think I’m finally cutting my items to the bone, and I’m grateful for these perspectives. I still have enough to wear, though there are new wardrobe holes that I think I will ‘sit’ with for a while until suitable items appear!

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