Weekend Open Thread!

275 Comments

1. Need some corporette advice here. My husband took a new job that will move us across the country. I don’t have a job lined up in the new city, but we’ve struggled for years to get on the same page career wise and it is my turn to sacrifice (I’m moving to new city with him). My question is how/when to tell my law firm, considering the following factors:

   1. I am supposed to attend a very expensive conference in a few weeks, and I have about 10 days until the conference fee, travel, etc. become nonrefundable. However, I’d like to continue working for at least 2-3 months after the conference and worry about sharing the news too early.

   2. My group is very short staffed right now and everyone is very busy and getting overworked. We have new people starting and a key person returning from parental leave in August/September.

   3. I would like to work through mid-August, both because we need money to make the move across country and because I don’t want to leave my colleagues even more frazzled then they already are. (Husband is starting new job in June, so we’d be apart for a short while).

   4. I am considering offering to work for my current firm part time remotely while I make the transition to our new city. I have reason to believe that this would work with my firm.

   So what would you do? If I tell the firm before the conference I risk being asked to leave before I anticipated. If I don’t tell them, I feel like I am taking advantage of the firm.

   1. No reason to tell them before the conference -after all, you plan to stay for four months and may work remotely. I’d broach the subject a couple of months ahead of time, unless you husband’s move makes it easier to raise sooner. And when you do raise it, start with the idea that you’re hoping to work it out to continue working remotely.

   2. Tell them four weeks or so before your intended end date. And don’t tell you coworkers in advance – someone will spill the beans.

      1. Agreed. Plus, situations may change so make sure you do what’s best for YOU.

         1. These comments make sense. Thanks for all the help!

2. I know Kat had a great post about career change a little while back and I missed out on asking this in context, but just curious if anyone has had the experience of professional school + starting a family at the same time. Any words of warning, encouragement or advice?

   I’m in my late 20’s and would like to have a couple of kids before 35, but I also want to get out of my current field and get the ball rolling on education for my new career ASAP. Am I crazy, or is this do-able? Financially, I’m 95% sure we’ll be ok… I’m more worried about my sanity, and ability to be a “good mom” and a “good student” at the same time.

   1. What kind of professional school? I had a number of friends who had kids during law school or immediately prior to starting. Most of them felt it was a great time to have small kids because their schedule was entirely within their control. If you are a reasonably fast reader and can manage your time well, you should be fine with law school so long as you plan to pay for child care at least part time.

   2. I’m going to weigh in and assume that you’re considering business school but not a Top-10 ultra-competitive MBA. If you’re considering a reasonable program it is certainly possible to get a degree with young kids. But with anything related to parenthood, the trouble comes if one wants to be a perfect parent and perfect anything else (student, partner, friend, employee etc) as well. Nothing related to parenthood, in my opinion, can be predicted ahead of time except that it will be unpredictable.

      So decide what kind of student you want to be and what sacrifices you’re willing to make ahead of time. Same with your partner/spouse – you both need to be on the same page. With an infant or young toddler, there’s a lot to be said for going to school while they’re young. It’s also a good way to lower your opportunity cost to attend school – and a valid reason on a resume for a gap in employment that needs no additional explanation.

      Good childcare will be important, as will be a flexible spouse. You might get away with less childcare than if you were employed full-tie but you’ll still need it. The problems may come when the baby is sick, you have a project due (with teammates who don’t have kids) and your spouse is out of town or has a work crisis of his own. Will you have backup childcare like relatives or close friends?

      All in all, I’d say to go for it. Plan what you can and the rest will work out.

   3. I am super jealous of my friends who had kids during law school – they ended up, because of their flexible schedules, having much more time with their little ones. Whereas I was working from home 2 weeks after having DH and back in the office 5 months after. Definitely go for it!

3. Just bought this dress (in the green) to wear for an “island” themed celebration at a beach the night before my friend’s wedding. Suggestions on styling? I’m about 5’5 and wear a large. Heels feel a bit much, maybe wedges? Any tips on making this look breezy, but pulled together would be AMAZING.

   1. Wedges over heels, definitely, but what about some flat strappy sandals? I’d think it would be difficult to walk on sand in wedges, but I am rather clumsy.

   2. I’d say nude, tan or bronze espadrilles. There are so many cute ones! Don’t wear heels on the beach. You’ll sink. Even a kitten heel will be impossible Definitely chose flats, platformy flats or wedges, though wedges will be harder to walk in.

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