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Weekend Open Thread: Evereve

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black bubble-hem maxi

Something on your mind? Chat about it here.

Historically I'm not a fan of a bubble hem on anything — jackets, blouses, dersses. But… is this bubble hem maxi not adorable? Because I'm short I'm usually limited to petite maxi dresses, unless I want to look like I'm trying to be dramatic with a trailing hem. (OK, fine, or have them hemmed.) But a bubble hem… I'll bet I could wear this dress as it is, even though there isn't a petite size.

Plus: POCKETS.

The dress is $138 at Evereve, available in sizes XS-XL.

Sales of note for 6/25:

144 Comments

  1. I recently saw someone talking about how Spanx jumpsuits are open in the back and stretchy so you don’t have to get completely undressed to use the bathroom (it just looks like a floating cropped top) — my mind was blown. Is this a common feature for jumpsuits? I hate getting naked in public bathrooms.

    1. Not all Spanx jumpsuits have this feature, but I’ve definitely seen it on some designs for other brands too. I think it’s a great development!

    2. I can’t picture this. You pull the back down so low that your crotch is free to urinate? Doesn’t the neck choke you in the front then?

      1. the fabric is only attached at the front, so you can rotate the back down around your butt as if it’s on a hinge.

  2. Awkward work situation, idk what I’m looking for but here goes nothing.

    I have to brush my teeth several times a day (including floss and a special mouthwash) for medical reasons. There is a person on my team who is a shy bathroom goer and at least once a day she silently sits in a stall and listens to me do my oral care, it’s weird, but then in the hallways she gives me the death stare. I get it’s probably psychological on her part, but lots of other folks come and go which I think is the much more normal course of action. But I’m fairly certain she thinks I’m the bad guy ‘trapping’ her because of my medical problems.

    1. Weird, but chose to ignore and not comment on weirdness. IDK that anyone wants to live in a world of bathroom critiques.

    2. on your team like, she reports to you? ask her what’s wrong when she gives you the stare.

      in any event, if you are a shy bathroom goer (are we talking 1 or 2 here?), that is just a risk of working in an office – needing to wait out a parade of people. if you want to be extra accommodating, if you see her enter the bathroom ahead of you, maybe give her a minute before you enter yourself. if you enter and someone is in a stall, whatever, do your thing.

    3. This reminds me of the workplace I was at for a few years that had just two stalls that had big gaps in between the door and the stall structure so you could very easily see into and out of the stall. There was absolutely no privacy for any…extended visits to the stall. One woman would brush her teeth after every meal and snack and take the most time I ever saw of anyone brushing teeth ever, even if someone was stinking up the whole place, and it was in fact awkward many a time. However, if you’re in a larger bathroom with modern stalls with no gaps, I don’t see this being a problem.

        1. Nah, it was pretty damn weird that she took upwards of 10 minutes to brush her teeth multiple times a day. She also had a very odd personality vibe in general and didn’t last long at the company so take it for what you will.

          1. Ten minutes multiple times a day? No one’s teeth enamel is strong enough for that.

        2. It IS weird to do in a public restroom. I don’t give people the death stare but I HATE it.

        3. Taking excessive amounts of time in an occupied joint bathroom where others are likely to want privacy is the weird part. Social convention is to try to give others privacy or the semblance of privacy when they are doing their business not linger.

    4. When I had to brush my teeth at work with Invisalign, I would go several floors out of my way to a single stall bathroom. It was more because I felt weird brushing and flossing in front of other people, not that anyone gave me the stink eye. I see people brushing in the common bathroom occasionally and everyone just gets on with it.

      1. Yeah I would just go use another bathroom too. I hate when people treat the communal bathroom like theirs at home. Go find an obscure one, there always is one around.

        1. This is one of the things a bathroom is for. If it’s the one that’s reasonably available, the OP can use it as she needs to.

          1. She can, but if she can find a less used one, it’s good manners on her part to find it and use it.

    6. This is probably a lot worse for her than you, and unless she has actually told you she is bathroom shy, I would assume that she might very well have a medical problem causing the bathtroom awkwardness.

      1. Yeah, I know from a family member with a gastrointestinal disorder that she really feels uncomfortable if people linger at the counter doing a leisurely makeup routine or something when she’s having an episode. For my part, I don’t get why those people linger. Who wants to hang out when the smell hits?

  3. I certainly don’t need another black dress, but I love this. In another life, I aspired to own a bubble-hem item. I think it’s perfect for warm weather.

    1. I recently bought this amazing light blue bubble-hem skirt from Tuckernuck. It’s maxi length on me and was a big hit at a recent charity event.

  4. Lots of discussions this morning that referenced Reddit. Just curious because it historically has been a relatively male dominated social media outlet: Do you spend time on Reddit? How much? What is your normal scene there?

    1. I spend a lot of time on Reddit because there are subs for my employer, city and all my hobbies. I have femme hobbies so the subs are mostly free of misogyny. Unfortunately there are also a lot of bots.

      1. I would call it my primary social media. Yeah, there are gross corners, but it’s easy enough to stay away from them. For local news/events/scoop, it’s great, and there’s subreddits for every nerdy and niche hobby and occupation you can think of. In many ways it’s the closest thing to pre-Elon twitter.

        1. If you haven’t ever used Threads, I think it’s the closest thing to pre-Elon twitter. Or maybe more like if original Tumblr and Twitter had a baby.

          I use reddit mainly for the subreddits for my city/region and sometimes hobby subreddits

    2. Reddit lurker. Mostly catch up on reality show behind the scenes drama (hello, Secret Lives of Mormon Wives messiness). Our city’s reddit is also very active at getting news out, especially during natural disasters.

    3. yes, I check in on a few niche pages (travel, hobbies, local newsy bits), but we’re talking maybe half an hour a week, not keeping a tab open like I do here :)

    4. I only started using it when I was pregnant and postpartum – I got so many great answers to random questions there (and never even had to make my own posts since all the questions I had had been asked and answered). My usage naturally slowed to a trickle as my baby started sleeping better and I had less reason to be on my phone in the middle of the night, but I still sometimes look at motherhood-related things, sometimes my local city page, the page for where I like to go skiing (for conditions), and that’s about it. I think as a company, it’s super troubling and messed up and anti-woman, so I do like to keep my usage very minimal.

    5. yes but it is definitely male-dominated. I think about 70% of the users are male.
      I check blogsn@rk (which I think is what got me there, after GOMI kind of collapsed), parentsn@rk, popculturechat, my city’s sub and a few travel subs.

      1. I once posted a video of me snowboarding (you can’t see my hair in it) and they all assumed I was a man. It wasn’t even on their radars that this 5’4″ snowboarder with a turquoise jacket was a woman.

      3. What happened to gomi?It seemed like one day it was fine and the next it was dead. I never know who they’re talking about on blogsnark.

        2. There was one on Tumblr eons ago I believe. I never really read it, but it was mentioned here.

    7. i do like reddit for health and gardening (flowers) experiences like with zepbound tips or other weird issues like eustachian tube disorder or whatever.

    8. I love Reddit and am glad to hear other ‘rettes are on their too. I think I enjoy it so much because it’s a giant comment section. And I love a comment section. Which is why I’ve looked at THIS comment section every day for many, many years.

    9. Pretty much the only social media I use. I’ve been an avid redditer for over a decade.

      I don’t post, but I read a TON. Never realized it was thought to be so male dominated.

      Mostly stay on subreddits related to my hobbies (lots of sports, some fashion, Money Diaries, the outdoors), my city, some related to my career, and some funny ones. When I came out and didn’t have a queer community I got a LOT of info from Reddit.

    10. I use it way more than any other social media. Some of the subreddits I frequent appear to be male dominated, others seem mostly female, generally as you’d expect based on the subject matter. I’m sure there’s plenty of problematic stuff, but all the subreddits I use are pretty well moderated. Like other people have said, it’s useful for local news now that I’m off Twitter.

    11. I use reddit as a reference guide for specialty subjects, to find obscure but helpful facts and tips.

    12. The menopause community there is excellent. It was my first source for perimenopause when I didn’t know what it was. It helped me find a doctor when mine was useless.

      I don’t have an active account, but there are a few hobby or tv show/book subreddits I enjoy reading.

    13. Not unless I am researching medication side effects. People there are really helpful when you are taking something new.

  5. I work in marketing, and I’ve built a solid following on the most relevant social media channel for my industry, I published a book that’s doing well, and I regularly speak at industry conferences and podcasts.

    I also work for a large company, and they’re generally pretty hands-off with all of my writing and speaking.

    The problem is that I have zero motivation in my actual day job these days. I feel like my work doesn’t matter, I don’t feel valued or appreciated, and I don’t see growth opportunities. I’ve mentioned to my manager that I would love to do more speaking and writing as part of my official role vs. just on the side, but there’s a lot of politics involved.

    For example, I sit on Team A, with Title A. Team B needs a speaker. But, oh no! I don’t have Title B, so that must mean I can’t be the speaker. Team B then runs around, desperately trying to recruit someone with Title B to be the speaker. They finally book someone, and it’s a heavy lift to make slides, prep that person, then scheduling is a nightmare, and the end product is mediocre. I have credibility with the audience and expertise in the topic for Team B, it’s literally just that I currently sit in a different team.

    In contrast, every time anyone sees me speak, they comment about how I should be doing all the speaking for the company.

    Has anyone successfully figured out how to be more of the face, without fully switching roles?

    1. Is it your job as part of marketing to make the slides & prep the person, blah blah blah, or is that something you can just not be involved in if it’s not leading to the recognition/growth you’d hoped it would?

      2. Sometimes my team is involved in creating the content and slides, but I don’t do that work, so at least it’s not someone taking credit for my ideas or assets I create.

        Perfect example: someone in my network is looking for panelists for their Cannes Lions activation. We are customers of their company, so they wanted to request that I speak there. But if they reach out to our team with the request, they’re going to have to fight to get me as the speaker, because I’m not “officially” a speaker. But the topics that they want to present on are squarely in my wheelhouse, and I have presented on these topics publicly many times.

        I’m trying to move to a different team where this would be less of an issue, but since I’m quite senior, there’s few/no roles open elsewhere at the moment.

        1. It kind of sounds like this is driven by internal politics (the other team wants someone from their team to be the official presenter, so it can’t be you?) so I’m not sure how useful general industry advice is

          But a question that might help clarify what you want/figure out what you want to do next is: do you want to be the speaker because you find it rewarding externally (Ie. you enjoy the spotlight while you’re doing it; it raises your profile in the industry so you can eventually move to a better company, etc) or internally (you are hoping that if you become a more public face of your company, it will lead to promotions/raises etc in your current role)?

          Either is reasonable! But if it turns out making the switch is politically impossible at your current company, the next best step is probably different depending on your end goal.

    2. are there any similar speakers (in your company or your network) who made the transition? might be a good networking opportunity or mentoring. not sure if something like tastemasters or whatever would help, or a “brief survey” after the talk to collect praise, or something like that?

    3. I mean, it makes total sense to me that Team B wants one of their own presenting their work.

  6. shoot – i went to my doctor today and had bloodwork done. i hadn’t been for a regular checkup for 2 years because i had a medical emergency last june and got all bloodwork done then. but now i’m realizing it hasn’t been 365 days — should i try to call lab and see if i can pay cash? call doctor? just wait and see how stupid my insurer is about this?

    2. I don’t think medical emergency bloodwork would be normally coded as annual check up bloodwork, unless they coded it that way for you just to help you out last June.

    3. I would expect insurance to cover the routine checkup bloodwork since the last round would not have been coded as “routine” or “preventive” or whatever, and you would have had to pay for it. Also, if you do have to pay, the insurance discount on bloodwork is enormous.

    4. My insurer covers once per calendar year as preventative coverage. They don’t fuss over 365 days. Genuinely would be surprised if yours cares.

      1. Same here, although mine goes by the Oct-Sept plan year. It’s even laid out in the one page plan summary.

      2. OP here – my insurer definitely does not. was just looking into whether i could book my son’s yearly checkup during summer so he doesn’t have to miss school and they wouldn’t do it because it wasn’t yet 365 days.

      1. last time i went for a blood draw at this place it was for some reason $500 so god only knows how much it’ll be this time. not sure if my doctor included something weird but it was definitely just regular yearly physical checkup.

  7. UK question! I’m in the US and my BFF immigrated to the UK. She’s had a very rough post-partum – hospitalized with sepsis and a surgery to follow up on her c section. Is there anywhere I could ship her a care package from that wouldn’t require international shipping? She’s near Birmingham if that makes a difference.

    1. I’d order something local to her from a local store. They’ll take your credit card but the shipping and delivery would be local that way.

    3. Fortnum and Mason has an international website where you can order for UK delivery. Send her a hamper. Make sure to send one that comes with an actual hamper.

    4. You can easily send gifts from John Lewis or Marks & Spencer UK. They do great hampers.

      Doesn’t make any difference where in the UK she is, but you do need her specific mailing adress and probably phone number.

      1. Seconding both these hamper (gift basket) options. I wish my American friends had thought to send me something like this after we had our kid – it’s very thoughtful.

  8. I have a coworker who I think is in an emotionally abusive marriage. He was just now playing a call from his office on speakerphone, where the wife is sobbing hysterically and screaming the way someone in absolute distress might (like you just witnessed a car crash – guttural screaming and choking on her sobs). A few months ago, after his mother passed, he was on the phone with her (again on speaker) while she raged and yelled at him for inviting his father to stay with them for a few nights around the funeral.

    I think he might be playing these calls on speaker phone at work as a cry for help? I can’t understand what else it could possibly be. It seems out of line to mention anything to him but also bizarre to ignore (especially this last one, which was so disturbing – the most guttural sounds of human distress I’ve ever heard).

      1. I think maybe I’d quietly ask “are you okay?” in the moment and let him take it from there. At least he’ll have a heads up that others can hear.

        1. This is also what I would do, but I would phrase it “is everything OK” – a minor difference but I’ve found that people sometimes open up more if they can speak about “everything” rather than their own personal feelings.

    2. Don’t involve yourself. You only see a tiny snippet (that he shares) chances are she isn’t the abusive one.

      1. Why would you make a blanket assumption that goes against what OP is witnessing with her own ears? This type of behavior is controlling and I’ve seen many women use it to manipulate people or situations to their advantage. Also sometimes people really are this unhinged.

        1. Not who you replied to, but twisting the situation to make the abusee look crazy or convince people that the abusee is the abuser is fairly beginner lever in the abuser’s handbook.

          Not saying that’s the specifics here, but it is a common part of isolating the abusee.

    3. wait so he is being emotionally abusive to her or she is to him? he kind of sounds like the AH here

      2. Allowing your father to stay with you for a few days around a funeral is out of bounds?

        1. No but why have private conversations with your wife on speakerphone especially when she’s sobbing?

          Plus you don’t know – maybe there’s a story there with FIL. He slapped the kids or came on to her or whatever.

    4. She may have a medical condition that makes her sound like this. If so, he is highly unlikely to want attention brought to it.

  9. Has anyone renewed their TSAprecheck recently? I went on and they seem to want you to only renew through a partner that you have to join – clear, telos or idemia. This is different than when I first registered. I’ve only ever seen Clear in an airport. I am confused :(

    1. I did. Those contractors are just handling the processing. I chose one at random and got renewed.

    1. It’s a Lot of Look. I’mnot sure I would have thought of a shower curtain but since you mentioned it that’s what I see. In any case, it’s a very bold pattern and to my eye looks a bit childlike. But most of my clothes are black and gray, so what do I know?

      1. I’m the OP and I primarily wear black so was thinking this would be a fun addition. I’m still undecided, argh!

    2. I kind of love the orange one. I think I had one like it in sixth grade.

    3. I wouldn’t have come to that conclusion, and I like bright coats. If this makes you happy, wear it!

    4. A pop of color and why not? I love to see color in clothing and am glad that the younger crowd seems to be bringing it back. Such a nice change from black-grey-beige everything. Go for it!

  11. I can’t wear this dress because of the bare top but I think it is adorable and I wish it would work for me.

  12. Ugh, I’m getting so sick of a coworker who keeps recommending AI for EVERYTHING. “You can use Claude for that.” “Do you want to use Claude for that?” “I’m using Claude.” Yes, I f*cking get it, you don’t write a single sentence without Claude. Just stoppppppppp.

      1. I have a hypothesis that dementia rates will increase for the heaviest AI users. You can’t outsource your thinking, writing, and problem-solving skills without consequences.

    2. I’m in a local “foodies” FB group and commented how tired I am of seeing the same black-background, red-yellow-white lettering AI flyers over and over again.

      The creator of the group sent me a multi-paragraph DM telling me that he hates AI too, but his hands are tied and that I should be nicer. He also asked “what’s your solution,” to which I responded “leaving the group.”

    3. Yeah, I find it disturbing how many of my otherwise intelligent coworkers talk about “asking AI” instead of doing even minimal research. Like, why would I ask AI what time the restaurant opens and gamble on whether it was right, when I could just look up the hours directly? Or look at the filing deadline listed on the government page instead of asking AI what the due date is? Why are we doing this?

      1. Someone on the moms page recommended asking ChatGPT about how to treat a stain. That’s the sort of thing I wouldn’t trust ChatGPT with, because the information isn’t dynamic or complex and you can just google it?

        1. AI is unnecessary for the stain query because a simple G00gle search will be fine, but that at least it’s static info and AI will likely give a reasonably correct answer. Asking AI about restaurant opening hours is far sillier, because AI is terrible at keeping up with changing info and will likely spit out the wrong info.

          1. AI will likely give an answer that sounds reasonable. That’s it. The odds of an incorrect answer are whole number percentages, often double digits.

        2. If you “just google it”, Google is going to generate an AI answer for you too, so I’m not sure there’s a meaningful energy usage difference (assuming you don’t have claude set up permanent long thinking mode) anyway

          2. I use Duck Duck Go because you can opt out of those stupid AI summaries. If I am on a browser that has them, I have trained my eyes to skip over them like they are ads and scroll to the search results lower down.

      2. OP here and another coworker told me that on his recent business trip with our Claude-loving colleague, he would use Claude for everything – what terminal is the airline (came back with wrong answer), what time does the restaurant open, you name it. That’s an absolute abuse of our planet with no benefit.

    4. Solidarity. I have a coworker who always wants to “ask Chat” or share that she “asked Chat” and this is what “Chat said” and it makes me twitch. “CHAT” IS NOT A PERSON. YOU ARE AN ANALYST USE YOUR BRAIN.

  13. is it worth it to get new quotes from insurance companies? we have 20-year term with 5 years left + 2 cars + personal articles policy with state farm. prices are crazy and i’m annoyed at a recent “late fee.” how do you do this? do i need a referral to an agent?

    1. You can probably get the late fee waived if you’re a loyal long term customer.
      Not sure about the quotes. I have the same question. Our State Farm rates seem to have gone up quite a bit.

    2. Getting quotes is pretty easy; I do it every year or two to see if I can find a better rate. I am cautious, though, that we don’t change to a company known for insuring in areas with a high number of total loss claims. My neighbor chose one of those companies and the following year her rates doubled, then they dropped her based on drone footage that claimed her brand new roof needed replaced. They refused to come look at it in person to verify that it was indeed brand new.

    3. It may or may not be worth it. I toke all of my insurance forms to a broker every few years. It takes 10 minutes of my time. I just walk in with a folder and hand it off to the person at the front desk and agent calls me back in a few days. So far they have never been able to beat the rate I’m currently getting from Erie. One year a broker did find me a $5 discount at an insurance company I had never heard of. I didn’t switch. I live in suburban Maryland and there is an insurance brokerage every few miles on the major street I travel every day so finding a broker that handles multiple companies is not an issue. I’ve never had contact after I say no with any broker I’ve used so far. On the years I don’t shop rates I call my agent and ask for a review of my insurance, twice they have found a discount that had not been applied — once, a decade ago, I actually had money refunded to me after they applied the discount.

    4. I have extra insurance policies with the Auto Club. You can get life for sure, and I believe you can get home-owner’s insurance as well. Check ’em out.

  14. Partner A is frustrated by something minor Partner B did but doesn’t criticize Partner B outwardly. Partner B complains that Partner A is “radiating disapproval”. Reasonable complaint?

    (The “something minor” was ordering something that Partner A had said earlier that morning that they had already ordered, in a way that wasn’t cancellable. It’s shelf stable and will get used eventually, so the frustration here is about the not listening, not really the duplicate item).

    1. Definitely a reasonable complaint. There’s nothing more annoying than a partner who sighs, huffs, and glowers over something minor instead of a) using their words to express frustration or b) moving on.

      1. To be clear, using words to express frustration also would’ve gotten a complaint from Partner B, and we’re talking about a single sigh.

      1. To be clear, Partner B wanted Partner A to not be annoyed at all and would’ve had the same reaction to Partner A using their words.

        1. Doesn’t matter. Using words is the actual issue because it’s the only thing likely to improve similar situations going forward.

        2. Ok both of these two sound exhausting. Partner A should have said B seriously I just told you I ordered it this morning!? And B could say sorry I was distracted, oh well we’ll use it all. And then everyone moves on!

          1. Ah, and therein lies the rub, because I (partner A) said “did you miss me saying I’d already placed the order?” and partner B said “can we not start the day off with what I’ve done wrong?” I sighed and went to tidy up something in the kitchen since I was annoyed but wanted to not have a conflict, and he said I was radiating disapproval. I said “bud, I’m just cleaning up in here,” and that ended the conflict.

            This is a very happy marriage with two kids under two, who collaborated overnight to make both of their parents very tired and grumpy this morning! Getting a little of my grumpy out here while I was drying the dishes kept me from being grumpy IRL all day, so at least there’s that.

          2. Girl, you are going to rocket to divorce if you can’t figure out how to get past silly disagreements like this. Both of you just need to figure out how to laugh it off and move on.

          3. I feel like this falls into the category of “don’t sweat the small stuff.” When I get annoyed at stuff like this I try to mentally reverse the roles — I would hate to be chided for a mistake like that so I try not to do it to my husband. (And he is the world champion at letting stuff like that go.)

            Now if it’s a pattern, that’s another thing. But it doesn’t sound like that’s the case here. Just breathe and move on.

          4. Agree w 11:24. Why are you writing about this? It’s a non-event. Not every interpersonal conflict is a story.

          5. I cannot with a woman who’s been divorced, what, three times now? chiming in with marriage advice. This place really does need a snark sub.

          6. Don’t be rude, anonymous. Go get some more sleep and keep private things private.

          7. The comment about SA is really mean. It was good advice. If you don’t like it, ignore it, but the personal attacks are so uncalled for. also fwiw as a never-divorced person I feel like people who’ve been divorced and are happily remarried are more qualified to give marriage advice because they’ve been in both good and bad marriages.

          9. My apologies to SA – this one commenter is really really nasty to everyone. I wish I could find a way to block them but if moderation is working correctly I can usually just delete them, but I didn’t see this one in the moderation queue.

  15. Does anyone know the deal with “settled funds” at Schwab? A few times when I’ve gone to transfer money it says we have like $125k cash in one of our accounts. Each time I check and we have >$3k in cash and everything else invested. Each time we haven’t made any major transactions that might not have cleared yet. (The whole account only had 750k or so in it so definitely not market gains!)

    1. It might be in money market funds which are considered “cash” but are a security that would need to be sold.

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