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Our daily TPS reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices. This week of TPS reports come to you from another recently pregnant lady: Work That Bump blogger, mother, lawyer, and overachieving chick, K.
Dillard's currently has some very good sales on their Antonio Melani line. Everything I've purchased from that line has been high quality with a little pizzazz. Take, for example, this peplum top. I would wear it just as they have it styled but add a long station necklace. They also have two other peplum tops that are on sale and would look good under a suit. This one is $31 at Dillard's, marked down from $89. Antonio Melani Molly Peplum Knit Top
Seen a great piece you'd like to recommend? Please e-mail tps@corporette.com.
roses
Sorry for the early threadjack, but I’m pretty desperate for advice. I woke up yesterday morning with a sty on my eyelid – my eye is about half-swollen shut and it looks very strange and a little gross, but I’m otherwise fine. It’s not contagious like pink eye. I didn’t have any meetings yesterday, so I just emailed the 3 people I’m working with on a project and said that I wasn’t going to be able to come in and was working from home. Unfortunately, it’s not much better today, and I have a meeting with a partner scheduled. I am physically able to go into work but I’d rather not deal with the weird looks and have to explain my condition to everyone. But I don’t want to say that I’m just “not feeling well” because I’m perfectly capable of working from home. Telling the partner though that I have a sty on my eye seems a little TMI though. Any ideas on how to handle??
tesyaa
It may look grosser to you than it looks to others, so if you can objectively say it’s not terrible, then I’d go in. If it really looks terrible, I think you’re better off not going in – because I don’t think people would necessarily be reassured that it’s not contagious, even if it’s 100% not. Telling the partner you have an “eye infection” and working from home doesn’t sound like TMI to me, and that’s probably what I’d do.
Anon
How do you know it’s not contagious? I’d just say eye infection, need to work from home, and call into the meeting.
roses
The bacteria that causes a sty is typical bacteria that is present on most people’s skin and easily fought off unless it gets in a sensitive place like your eye. Unless I like wipe my eye and then touch someone else’s eye directly, there’s no more of a risk of someone else developing one by coming in contact with me vs. touching their own eyes with the everyday bacteria on their hands.
Anne Shirley
Yeah but work doesn’t need to know that! Just email the partner, say you have an eye infection and can’t come in, but are available to do the meeting by phone.
roses
Totally agree! Like I said, I’m trying my hardest to not be TMI. If you all don’t think “eye infection” is TMI, I’ll go with that. Thanks!
Pink
“eye infection” def not TMI– hit’s the right note of actual reason and responsibly considering other people.
Anon
Unless you’re a doctor and we all work in a hospital, I wouldn’t believe you and would be irritated that you went into work. You may know what you’re talking about but a lot of people underestimate their contagion status (hence all the winter colds and flus that pass around). Stay home sick.
anon-oh-no
a stye is not contageous. but, i had this happen last week. here’s what helped: go to the drugstore and look in the eyedrop section. there is something called “stye eye.” use those. the same brand that makes those drops sells this little thing that functions like a hot compress. you put it in the microwave for 10 seconds and then hold it on your eye for like 10 minutes. doing this for a day cleared things up tremendousely. oh, and dont wear eye makeup.
as for work, i just put my glasses on (which i never, ever wear) and wore my hair down, then stayed in my office as much as possible.
Parfait
any kind of hot compress helps. Also keep the eye scrupulously clean.
I had one of those a couple years ago. It was SO GROSS and so satisfying when it finally burst and I was able to wipe all the goo out of the corner of my eye.
Clementine
Can you just tell them as much as they need to know? “I woke up and my eye was swollen shut. I was hoping that it would be resolved today, but it isn’t any better. Is there any way that we can have a meeting over the phone today and I will follow up Monday?”
That way, they know the relevant info (eye swollen shut) but also that there’s a game plan.
Bewitched
Your eye doctor can assist with this quickly, and I’d recommend that you give him/her a call. Sometimes eyelashes can get stuck under the skin and can cause irritation/infection. I wouldn’t wait for it to go away. They may be able to give you some advice as to steps you can take at home (hot compresses etc).
roses
I’ve had styes before, and I am treating with hot compresses and antibiotic drops that I have from a previous one. I don’t have an eye doctor, and this doesn’t seem extreme enough to go out and get one.
Mom
You are missing work and using old antibiotics. You only get 2 eyes. Get on google, find an eye doctor, and go today.
roses
Thanks “mom,” but seriously, I wasn’t looking for medical advice. I know what’s wrong because I have been to the doctor for the same issue in the past, the drops are not past their expiration date, and it’s an easy problem to deal with on my own.
Blonde Lawyer
Ugh you just reminded me of something I was glad to have forgotten. I had an eyelash grow the wrong way and it was scraping my eye. It was blonde and fine and I couldn’t see it. The eye doctor found it looking with magnification at my perpetually irritated eye. He had to pluck out the offending lashes which doesn’t sound that awful but was SOOO painful. Luckily it never grew back.
People's Republic
I agree with the vote of “eye infection.” It’s a home remedy and I am not a doctor, but the few times I have had stys (sties?) in my life, I’ve used a warm black teabag (steeped in boiling water, allowed to cool for a sec) as a compress every 30 min or so, and it’s gone away within an hour or two.
happy
Love it. And the other two linked too.
preg anon
This could also work well under a white suit! Wish I had included that in my write up.
Miss Behaved
I love the red top. It’s just barely a peplum, but I can’t justify spending $8.95 on shipping.
HSAL
Shipping always gets me too. But I’ll happily pay $30 more in product someplace if I can avoid $5 in shipping. It’s ridiculous.
Mo
But it’s not completely ridiculous because you’d get the $30 extra back if you don’t like the shirt but that $5 is gone forever. Paying shipping makes me far more likely to keep a bad purchase, so I don’t let myself buy unless I can do free shipping/returns.
Ellen
Yay! Fruegel Friday’s! I love Fruegel Friday’s and this PEEPLUM TOP, Kat! Great Pick, and not to expensive either. I think I could wear this on casueal Summer Friday’s, when I do NOT have to go into court. I can even walk into work like today with this Peplum top! Its so nice to be abel to wear a top that men can NOT waste so much time stareing at us b/c they show to much.
My freind called and all of a sudden, Mason is very interested in her. Lynn is giveing me dirty looks b/c I think Mason must have said something about her to her. I kind of knew Mason could not be trusted. He is a user and is still useing Lynn (sleepeing over at her apartement b/c it is convenent, and then oogeling other women like my freind). My friend does NOT even know Mason exist’s, and I think that is why he is so interested. Lynn is the opposite. She has literaly bared everything to him (multiple times), so he has seen everything he need’s to see (and done everyting she is willing for him to do) so he figure’s that it is time to moove on. FOOEY on men that do this! I don’t know why I am stickeing up for Lynn, except b/c she is a woman and has given of herself like me and gotten NOTHING in return (other then dirty sheet’s, I supose).
I think men like this have to be dealt with properly. We should NOT have sex with men that care only to have sex. DOUBEL FOOEY! Can’t we organize something to give us more power in the bedroom like this? I say we need to be more like the ladie’s that gave us what we have today, and NOT just do whatever men want for us to do. TRIPEL FOOEY! FOOEY!
Niktaw
Help me understand how a peplum top would work under a jacket, particularly a classic jacket.
I googled images for “peplum top under jacket” and found a couple looks that sort of worked. One had a cutaway jacket and the other a cropped one that ended where the peplum began.
However, I still can’t envision the featured top under a classic office suit.
Flats with arch support
Are there flats with arch support (incl. flat mary janes)? Asking this crowd (as opposed to the Medicare ladies, who seem to have many options, but they would not be work appropriate for me) before I waste any more time.
Aerith
There are. Many are not very attractive, but ugly is still work appropriate.
Flats with arch support
A lot that I looked at (catalog from a Medicare recipient) were open toe or some sort of elastic or velcro or something that says leisure / pool / retirement community. I bet my feet would love them, but too far on the orthopedic spectrum (although would love to wear even simple Birkenstock Arizonas to work).
roses
Dr. Scholl’s has some relatively cute ones: http://www.zappos.com/dr-scholls-womens~2#!/dr-scholls-women-flats/CK_XARC11wFSAu4CwAEB4gIEGAoBAg.zso
Mpls
I’m thinking Clarks and Born probably have some. Maybe Sofft? They aren’t going to be super-trendy, but they aren’t orthopedic shoes either.
Mpls
http://www.zappos.com/clarks-womens-shoes~1m#!/clarks-women-flats/CK_XARC11wFaApACwAEB4gIEAQsYAg.zso
Mpls
http://www.zappos.com/clarks-womens-shoes~1m#!/clarks-women-flats/CK_XARC11wFaApACwAEB4gIEAQsYAg.zso
Practical
Also Soft Spots.
http://www.zappos.com/softspots-posie-black-calf-ionic
Also, Hush Puppies.
http://www.zappos.com/hush-puppies-alter-pump-black-leather
http://www.zappos.com/hush-puppies-burlesque-black-leather
Also, if you can get a pair that is flat and either has a removable insole (The Hush puppies do), or some space, you can add a Superfeet insole for the support.
Anne Shirley
Try looking at Barking Dog Shoes (lots of suggestions for feet with challenges) and Harry’s Shoes (if you’re in NYC go to the store, but they have a decent on line selection too).
backgrounder
Birkenstocks (they’re making a comeback! should’ve kept mine from middle school, ha), Orthaheel, some of the Gentle Souls styles…
Baconpancakes
My Clarks ballerinas have more support than the Dr. Scholl’s branded $20 flats I found at DSW, so it’s really not brand dependent. I’ve had good luck at FootSmart, with search options for particular feet problems. I’ll admit, once I find the shoe on FootSmart, I have occasionally gotten them for cheaper with free shipping and returns over at Zappos. http://www.footsmart.com/Default.aspx
anon2
Look at vionicshoes dot com. Some are pretty ugly, but others might be passable. I have a pair of their flip flops and my feet are well supported and very happy in them.
anon
What about Rockport flats? They actually have a very low heel, which I always think provides more support, and they have some kind of adidas technology.
http://www.marylandsquare.com/p/rockport-womens-ashika-chain-ballet-slipon/?&color=Black
Flats with arch support
Some of the other Rockports look like they’ll work. Thanks for the suggestion — this has opened up a new world for me (I hope) and I think there is a store at one of the local malls.
anon
I have very high arches and put these Dr. Rosenberg’s arch supports in all my shoes. They also make one that is slimmer for sandals. It won’t make an uncomfortable shoe comfortable, but it helps with shoes that are almost comfortable. I have a pair of French Sole ballet flats that I am able to wear with these arch supports, I really couldn’t walk very far in them before. Good luck, I find it almost impossible to find comfortable flats that don’t look like orthopedic shoes.
http://www.amazon.com/Instant-Arches-Womens-WBIA-Black/dp/B000MSFOJM/ref=sr_1_2?s=shoes&ie=UTF8&qid=1403273231&sr=1-2
anon-oh-no
i add dr. schols hidden arch supports to all of my flats. and most of my heels. they are fantastic.
Blonde Lawyer
I’ve had luck with Life Stride. They are not real leather but held up well and didn’t get stinky. They also have a very small heel so they aren’t perfectly flat. They have a substantial sole too so they are supportive. The pairs I own are no longer on the website but they came in navy, gray, maroon and black and had a silver circular decoration on the top. I had to run a mile in them once to catch a bus and my feet (and shoes) were fine after. They were the best impulse purchase. I’m also wearing Life Stride pumps today that have great arch support but are heels not flats.
Anon
+1 I LOVE my Life Stride shoes
Lily-Student
Try putting Superfeet insoles into any fairly deep-profile flats? I have them in my casual sneakers and they are heaven.
Anon
I have high arches and I find the Clarks Propose Pixie flats to be extremely comfortable. They are soft inside and have padding in the whole shoe, including extra padding on the back. I’m also super picky about whether flats make my feet look huge, and these passed inspection.
a lawyer
I like cole haan air; they generally have good support.
Another option is smartfeet half-insole supports for flats. They work wonders. http://www.superfeet.com/en-us/insoles-and-sandals/delux-dress-fit-women-s-3-4
Dating Slo Mo
TJ. I’m newly single and back on the dating scene. I am not quite ready to date seriously yet, but I want to start meeting guys, going on dates, etc. I think this also might be good because I’ve had a tendency to jump from relationship to relationship, and I’d like to take it slow this time and actually date a few people. I’m also hoping to date people outside of my usual “type” because that hasn’t seemed to work well for me. I’ve never dated people casually before, and I’m wondering if there are some tips to keep it casual and slow. I’m not throwing any garden parties with these guys either (I save that for committed relationships). I have one guy I’m talking to who I have gone on a date with and then invited him to meet up with my friends one night. He wants me to watch his rec league softball game. Is this a girlfriend activity? Where do I draw the line?
Anon
I think you draw the line at what feels most natural and comfortable to you. Does he seem serious/more serious than you want to be? Then don’t go. Does it seem like it would be a fun and uncomplicated thing to do? Then go.
Anon
What are you looking to get out of dating? Making new friends? Meeting new people and seeing if you have a strong connection with them? I think you should remind yourself to keep dating many different people and don’t fall into a pattern where you find a guy you think is fine and keep going out with him, but if you’re invited to a softball game want to go, don’t overthink it.
OP
I think this is what I am worried about. I have a tendency to find guys who aren’t a great fit for me, but “good enough.” My goals of dating are all of the things you mentioned: meet new people, get “out there,” possibly meet someone I could have a strong connection with.
National_Anthem
I think you’re me.
Cream Tea
If you like him, go! If you don’t, give it a miss. You won’t actually see much of him anyway if he’s playing softball the whole time. If you’re not initially thrilled he’s asked you out again, might be a sign it’s not really going anywhere.
Mpls
The other thing to consider is that if you find yourself not being able to do the casual dating thing (ie, you are getting really invested earlier than you want), is to take a break from dating all together. Which doesn’t mean you can’t hang out with guys or meet new people, but it puts you in a different mindset where you aren’t constantly looking at whether your relationship has crossed the line from casual to more serious.
Anon
Trust your gut but from an objective perspective this doesn’t sound like a super serious activity. At your stage I would avoid planning a vacation with a guy or meeting the families, but ultimitely “getting serious” is much more an emotional issue than an issue of the activities in which you are partaking. You can spend a lot of time with one guy doing average things (such as going out to dinner) and still be seriously emotionally attached to him. I would make sure you are communicating your intentions to the guys as well (not necessarily on the first date, but early on) so that they are on the same page as you.
OttLobbyist
I agree with the folks saying trust your gut. The other thing is not to be afraid to ease back, or at least mention it if things are suddenly going too fast for you. Remember that dating is supposed to be fun, and not anxiety-inducing! I also support the taking a break from dating, and forcing yourself to spend time with men in an acquaintance or friend capacity. You can learn a lot about what you might be looking for ultimately in a partner that way, without the messy, awkward bits!
OP
Thanks everyone! I think I should probably make my intentions clear soon. I don’t think this guy is head over heels for me–we don’t see each other that often and we text once or twice per day (not my favorite way of communicating). But I think maybe I would have less anxiety if I got it out on the table that I’m not looking for a serious boyfriend at this time. I’ve honestly never been in this position before!
Jen
IMO, it’s not a girlfriend activity until you have a conversation about whether you are exclusive. Dating’s sort of a different game now than it used to be, and I think people spend a lot more time getting to know each other before becoming BF/GF than previously, probably because EVERYONE is dating around. I think it’s fine to go if you want to go, and no need to have a conversation about where it’s headed until it’s clear he only wants to date you.
It's Friday
Casual Friday is one of the most stressful mornings of my week. My office is business casual, and then I have weekend casual, but I don’t always think weekend casual is put together enough for work. Any tips? What’s everyone wearing today? I’m wearing red jeans and a chambray shirt with toms, and I really feel this is borderline too casual, but this is a ‘casual outfit’ for me.
Anon
Is there pressure at your work to be trendy? (e.g. I have a friend who works as a buyer for a clothing company, she dresses differently on casual Fridays than my friends who are engineers). I’d probably stick to dark blue jeans or black jeans on casual Fridays and a cute silk blouse. You can cuff the jeans and wear flats or heels during the summer.
Anon
Skinny leg chinos in medium grey (ankle length), a striped popover button-down and ballet flats. A cropped lightweight blazer for if i get cold.
Ditto
Same here – skinny gap trousers with a silky or crisp button-down worn untucked (must be fitted to look neat). A cashmere or fine wool cardi if it gets cold in the office or the button down is sleeveless or short-sleeved. Cardi can be longer than usual as long as the shoes are proportionate, i.e., a bit of a wedge or kitten heel. If cropped, then pointy-toed flats are nice. I like Toms but wouldn’t normally wear them to my biz casual office even on Friday as they can look sneaker-ish.
A Nonny Moose
I think the key is to still look very put together and professional. Go for outfits rather than clothes (cap hill style has written a lot about this and has great business casual outfit ideas). Usually I just sub my work pants for jeans or a denim pencil. So today I’m wearing professional flats, jeans, a tee and a blazer. The blazer keeps the outfit looking “casual day at work” and not “stopped by the office on Saturday.” I wouldn’t wear toms to work (although I know many people do)– I’d switch to ballet flats and throw a scarf over your top.
Famouscait
My office is on the business end of business casual during the academic year, but summers are on the casual end of business casual. I actually gave up trying to find a way to differentiate my Friday outfits (during the summer) because I also found it stressful.
JJ
We have a very business casual office during the week and jeans on Fridays. My jeans Friday equation is usually whatever tops I would wear with a pencil skirt, but with jeans and slightly more comfortable shoes. So, some type of tank/tee, a cardigan of some sort, jeans, and either flats, wedges, or (if I’m feeling rebellious) Sperrys.
Scully
I feel your pain. I hate casual Fridays too. I tend to go with business casual minus one, meaning a business casual skirt that I would wear the rest of the week, but with a casual graphic t-shirt, or a business casual top that I would wear the rest of the week with more casual pants or jeans. I’d eager to hear other solutions.
lawsuited
Exactly this. I wear a weekday blouse and jacket combo with jeans, or a weekday black pants and cardigan combo with a tee. I find the shoes clinch it for me, so I stick to flats or wedges which show that I still know I’m in an office, and wouldn’t wear flip-flops or Toms because those say “weekend”.
Maggie
I like this approach that Scully and others have mentioned. I love casual Fridays since I can swap out my usual pants/skirt for jeans. I sometimes go one step further, and if I wear a more casual top than usual, I’ll make sure I have more professional looking shoes, and vice versa. At my office some people go VERY casual (men’s tee, running shoes) but it just doesn’t feel right to me so I try to stay on the dressier side, though I will always wear jeans when it’s an option!
Calibrachoa
I am still working from home today so it’s still pajamas at this hour, but regularly my Friday concessions in our extremely in the casual end of business casual (my boss’s boss’s boss only wears a tie if we have clients onsite) place is that on Fridays, I bring out the graphic tees with geeky stuff on them or the band shirts. Tossing one of those under a blazer/cardigan (.. ok, or a hoodie) usually works pretty well.
Medic Maggie
Our office is always casual, so I will give you what I wore this week, as that is probably more in line with what your office might be:
Monday: peacock green skinny ankle jeans, flats, yellow square-neck embellished t-shirt (that makes it sound very chill, but it’s a nice shirt)
Tuesday: brown & peach/pink medallion print v-neck knee-length a-line dress w/cap sleeves (I had a public hearing)
Wednesday: khaki pants, tan/white abstract floral print v-neck sleeveless top
Thursday: yellow chinos, teal smocked-neck flutter sleeve top
Today: regular dark-ish bootcut jeans and a blue mexican/peasant top with red/blue embroidery
Every day I’ve worn the same sandals–open toe, criss-cross brown leather
CKB
I’m wearing darkish bootcut jeans and a purple tie neck tee shirt (ties aren’t long enough for a bow, though) and faux snake skin sandals.
I always wear jeans on Friday, and try to wear either a shirt that’s a step up from a regular tee, or a tee shirt with a cardigan, but my office goes pretty casual on Fridays.
BankrAtty
I’m wearing a bright blue ponte fit and flare dress with 3/4 length sleeves, a blue statement necklace (yeah yeah, it’s a lot of blue) and a pair of low and funky, black and cork miz mooz pumps.
Clementine
My office is fairly formal with Business casual (no jeans) on Fridays. It’s a little bit more relaxed during the summer (i.e., men can wear polo shirts on Fridays versus dress shirts without ties).
I’m wearing a pair of black skinny ankle pants pants with a black striped peplum top and a pair of neutral wedges.
Anonymous
I use jeans Friday as the day to wear my button downs that I can’t wear the rest of the week (because tucking doesn’t work for me and I wouldn’t wear them untucked with a skirt or dress pants).
Anon
I always just wear the same tops I would wear during the week with jeans or capris. I usually try to wear heels to make it look a little more polished. Today I am wearing white jeans, black heels, a nice black tank top, and a white blazer with black detailing.
Bonnie
A denim pencil skirt, blouse and wedges.
PrettyLawBelle
I am currently wearing chocolate brown linen pants, a white gauzy button-down top (with a self-tie), and chocolate brown wedges. On Fridays, I normally wear a printed skirt with a button-down or a camisole covered with a jean jacket or cardigan, or a casual (think ponte) dress covered with a denim jacket or cardigan.
Seattle Freeze
Striped maxi skirt, micro-striped long tank, pointy flats, and PNW regulation fleece. It’s like wearing pajamas at work :)
Miz Swizz
I’m wearing a beige linen knee-length skirt, a maroon tee and sandals. My office is very casual in general and even more so in the summer. I like pairing plain tees with summery skirts for casual Fridays because it’s 95 degrees outside so my go-to of jeans and blouse would mean I would’ve melted into a puddle at about 8:05.
anon
For the first time in my working life, I’m at a place where I can wear jeans on Friday. I’m too set in my ways because I always follow the “three piece” plan that I had to wear when I was an intern. Jacket + top + skirt or Cardigan + shell + pants or Dress + statement jewelry + cardigan… this is how I dress during the week. On jeans day, I wear a cardigan or casual blazer on top of a t shirt or shell with my jeans.
Today with my jeans I’m wearing a bright pink stand collar jacket (no buttons, bracelet length sleeves) a pink/blue/green abstract print t-shirt. It’s a jacket that would be too informal durign the rest of the week, IMHO. Last week I wore white eyelet jacket, bracelet sleeves and a white t-shirt with lace insets and a turquoise statement necklace over jeans. I’ve also worn a denim jacket, print flowy skirt and a shell.
So in reply to the OP -It’s Friday – I wouldn’t feel comfortable in just jeans and a button-front, but that’s me in my more formal corporate environment. I’m upper level management though, so YMMV.
anon
I should also add that my jeans are very dark wash bootcut and I’m wearing strappy wedge sandals.
Anonymous
I’m wearing dark skinny jeans, a black tee shirt with some crochet detail on the front, a white blazer and some black and white printed pointy flats.
Asking for a Raise
A few months ago, I was reading an article on the wage gap, and someone commented that he managed two people, a man and a woman, who both earned the same amount and had about equal performance. He said that he had determined to give each of them a raise of X%, but had authority to go up to Y% if they asked. The woman accepted the raise of X and said thank you, but the man said that, while he appreciated X, he was really looking for Z%, so he was given more, and boom, wage gap.
I guess I’ve never really had a job where it seemed appropriate to ask for more of a raise, or ask for a raise at all. For the past several years, I’ve worked for smaller, looser organizations, and raises haven’t really been a thing at all, and before that, I worked for a huge bureaucratic company where things were very regimented (though maybe I could have asked for bigger raises then, I don’t know). So, I guess it’s never really crossed my mind to ask for more on a raise – it seems different than negotiating over an offer, where, of course, you have the power to walk away.
I work now for a mid-range law firm, small enough that there aren’t really many policies, but large enough that there is a system of bi-annual reviews and bonuses. I’ve been here a little over a year, and didn’t get the first mid-year bonus/review (as I was too new). The end of year one was very informal – the two partners that I do the most work with pretty much just pulled me in, said that I was doing great, they liked this and this about me, keep doing what you’re doing, here’s your bonus check. They also mentioned that they would revisit my billing rate and salary next time. I’m in a fairly small city, where it’s hard to find data on how much a person should make in my field, but if you use the 1/3 of the billings standard that I’ve seen a lot, I could be making a bit more (even if they don’t raise my rate), and I did recently receive a recruiter call regarding a job with the same billing requirement that would pay about 35K more than I make (I have personal reasons for not exploring it, and of course, recruiters are going to exaggerate, but it did seem like a big difference).
So, what are your experiences with asking for raises, and should I ask for something more at my upcoming review?
Anon
I hope there are posters today with insight to answer this because I am very interested. My annual review is coming up soon and I think we get a raise. I’m at a law firm where the raises are discretionary, but this is also my first year as a lawyer and with the firm. Not sure what I should do if I think I’m getting the lower end of the possible raise.
Incognito
When I was at a midsize firm, things were presented in a very lock-step way and I did not negotiate. At my current small firm I have done a lot of negotiating and much of it was successful. My boss likes data. I keep a “brag file” through the year of all the things I accomplish. If I write a motion and we win, it goes in there. (Obviously not motions to continue but bigger substantive issues.) If I find him they key case that saves the day, I note it in my brag file. I then put together a list before my review. So I don’t hand him a file but I say I helped us win this, do that, get that client, etc. He loves that.
I also have access to my hours and receivables and I am able to explain any mitigating issues. My receivables for example are lower than they should be but I have several contingent fee cases that we have won that have payment held up in escrow for one reason or another. I point out any major cases I’m working on that are promised money that isn’t received. I note any major management style stuff I did for the firm even though I’m not a partner. For example, I assisted with hiring a staff member, I started an intern program, I supervise a law clerk, etc.
I get some data from Salary.com. It shows what an attorney in my region at my size firm should make. I think the data is skewed a bit high but I still use it to my advantage. I also concede the other benefits I get from my firm such as flexible schedule, not really enforced billable hour requirement, good cases and good people. I also mention calls I have received from recruiters – not that I want to leave, but that it gave me a glimpse into what attorneys are making elsewhere. He wants that data. His current office manager has access to some salary survey too so he usually asks her for that. I basically do a presentation.
At the end I say what I’m looking for. I include anything he might have forgotten (like that while I took a paycut to take the job it would only be a “temporary setback.”) I’m a mid-level associate. Two years ago I negotiated a 15% raise (to fix the temporary setback and to give me a performance raise). The following year I negotiated a 6% raise for cost of living/performance. My boss made clear at the 15% raise that I would not be looking at those kind of raises each year. The first one I had to fight harder for and he had to clear with his partner. The 6% he was able to agree to on the spot which makes me wonder if I left money on the table. I’m not sure what I’m asking for yet this year until I look at all my numbers.
The one area I’m still less than happy is with bonuses. Our idea of what was market was very different. We decided Christmas is the firm giving whatever it wants and then we worked out a formula for my annual review (which is mid year). The formula is one-third of receivables over and above three times my salary but that if I don’t make it but otherwise do good work I will still get a nominal performance bonus (I thought $5k he thought $1k I think we agreed to $3k) and that they will also keep in mind receivable issues that are beyond my control/due to work assigned.
Blonde Lawyer
There was also a post on a weekend thread probably two years back now where someone asked to poll attorneys in anticipation of her review. She was a mid or small law poster so the NALP and other studies wouldn’t be helpful. I think the posts included general region, firm/business size, year, hour requirement, type of law, salary and bonus. I found it incredibly helpful to read.
BB
Also here hoping that there are people with experience to chime in. (sorry!)
I’m in a similar position to you where I’m not sure how/if I should ask for a raise. Like you, I’ve been told that I’m doing great work. I’m not in law, but my role is structured with “levels” much like law. I think they try to keep the pay the same within levels, but I’m not sure. The pay I have now is great, and I’m about to get promoted. I’m pretty sure the new salary offer is going to be more than I expect AND higher than market…but should I still ask just in case?
Blonde Lawyer
I did some quick googling to see if I could find salary surveys for small firms and came across an entire NH Bar Journal issue on gender equality issues including the results of a 20 year follow up to a gender survey. Results are interesting.
http://www.nhbar.org/uploads/pdf/BJ-Summer2010-Vol51-No1.pdf Survey stuff starts at page 8.
Calibrachoa
My last salary review basically went you do a good job but because of this major screwup your entire team participated in, none of you get any this contractual year.
However – with everything that has gone down in the past few months, with me doing a lot of work my supervisor should be doing and basically stepping in when he went on his holidays and left the mess, next time I am in the office I am actually going to go to the boss and request that I get a formal assistant supervisor position and the resultant minor salary increase because I am already doing the job. So, yeah, I am keeping an eye on the replies here as well.
Blonde Lawyer
I’m just all over this thread but check out the Robert Half 2014 Legal Salary Guide. It actually has adjustments for cities in every state.
http://s3.amazonaws.com/DBM/M3/2011/Downloads/RHL_2014_Salary_Guide.pdf
Practical
Oregon Bar Association also has a comprehensive salary survey. I think it would be useful for Washington, Idaho, Norther California, and other parts of the west. The most recent is from 2012, released in 2013.
http://www.osbar.org/publications/bulletin/13apr/barmeasure.html
gov't pay reclassification help
I’m sorry if this is similar to the “asking for a raise” post, but it is inherently different because of being public sector…
I need some advice. I work in local govt, and our organization recently underwent a gigantic organization-wide reclassification of job descriptions. We hired a consultant who basically surveyed us about what we currently do, and how it applies to our current job descriptions. I ended up being one of 4 jobs to be reclassified out of about 200 employees, as I am doing far more than what my for-hire job description was 7 years ago.
Through all this, we ditched one consultant (they didn’t uphold their end of the bargain) and hired another to do pay band research/implementation. Our fiscal year starts July 1. I was told by my boss (I have no supervisor–my boss is the director of our department, and she reports straight to the top) that I would be getting a raise effective July 1, but it remained to be seen how much. So, in preparation for this, I did my own research, and looked at what other communities were paying their equivalent employees. I simply went on our industry website to troll job openings across the country. I pulled about 30 jobs that were pretty much equivalent to the job I am doing now, across the country, in all kinds of different COL areas. I adjusted my salary to their COL, and found that the range for the jobs posted out there was basically a 3% – 115% increase. There were some jobs that were offering less money than I am making, but not many. Most were more.
So, when I averaged it out, the average increase in salary was 46% above my current.
I got an email from my boss today. They’ve approved 7% plus 2.5% COL adjustment.
I feel like this is very disappointing, and somewhat insulting. I don’t know if there remains to be seen more money come January 1 (when the new pay bands, maximums and comparables will be rolled out), but I feel like this is a really weak gesture to put me in line with others in the industry. We do live in a small town, but for our area, we have a high COL, and it does affect everything. Next town over, we could have 2x the house we have for the same money, and it gets cheaper from there. We are the “1%” in our metro area as defined by the Bankrate COL calculator. It doesn’t say specifically, but I know ours is both the wealthiest (and costliest) community in our salary-comparison area.
Trouble is, we both have each other by the short hairs. I don’t want to leave (I’m not currently looking, and I wouldn’t be able to find another job in my field in this town–and we’re not willing to move), and they can’t afford to let me go because I’m really good at what I do, and everyone recognizes it. I know that sounds bold, but it is true.
How do I navigate this?
attornaut
When you were trolling for job comparisons, were they all public sector? Some public sector jobs have non-salary benefits–more relaxed office, fewer hours, no billable requirements, better health insurance, retirement, etc–that aren’t reflected in a salary to salary comparison.
Ultimately, a 46% increase seems pretty unreasonable. If you aren’t willing to move and won’t be able to find another position in your town–if, when push comes to shove, you aren’t willing to leave–then they haven’t priced your position too low, because the non-monetary value obviously outweighs what it lacks in salary.
Still, if your boss has the authority to overrule the consultant and increase the raise, then why not ask for it to be 10-15% + COL instead of 7?
Bonnie
I agree that 46% was probably too much to request and may have been seen as unreasonable by your boss.
Anon
Have a discussion with your boss about the salary band for the position you’re in. There should be some kind of salary range for your job and you should be able to learn where you fall into it and how compensation is calculated – usually it’s a combination of your performance review and where you fall within the band.
When they take into COL, think metro area, not the small town you live in. If the next town over is ten minutes away and you could have twice the house, and this is true of most of the towns except for yours, you may not have much of a leg to stand on with that argument.
HnH
Yes, did you compare to other public sector jobs or everything else? Our public agency also recently “adjusted” our salaries through a pay-grade restructuring. I got about a 12% increase which was still maybe 25% under what I would get in the private industry. But at the same time, I’m getting the gov’t holidays, the roll-over leave, the (admittedly not great anymore) pension plan, and the job security. Here, we don’t have raises unless we get a promotion to a new title/job with a higher pay grade, so raise negotiation is out of the question. I don’t know how your office works, whether they are more flex about that or not. I’d ask if it has happened before, otherwise you’ll just have to weigh your options with staying or leaving.
govt salary OP
I did only research public sector jobs.
I also did not propose any kind of number for what I was hoping for, I simply created a spreadsheet that outlined the comparable salaries and % increase, and gave it to my boss as a part of the consideration, but ultimately, my boss & the salary folks didn’t know the number I was reaching for–I just gave them all of the information that I found.
I agree that 46% seems like a lot. In a dream world, I’d get 70% (that’s about the upper third of my research). But, I feel like 10% is just throwing me a bone. As of 2008, we did away (froze) Pay for Performance, but we have gotten some COL adjustments over the years. We have been fortunate to not have to lay anyone off, but we cut costs by not hiring seasonal/temp employees, and we froze some positions as they were vacated. I got into this job right as the economy slowed down (I was laid off from a private sector job for 3 months before finding this one), but our economy is booming now.
You are right about the COL/expensive town argument–I hadn’t thought of it that way.
Ultimately, the Big Boss (town manager) has the authority to have discretion with salaries. There are stipulations in the handbook, though, this one is particularly relevant, though I don’t know what the hiring range for my actual job would be, but I am toward the upper end of the pay band of the 2nd-highest band (directors are the only band above me)…”if an employee’s position is adjusted…the current salary shall not be adjusted unless the minimum of the hiring range for the new class or band is higher than the current salary, in which case the employee will receive the minimum of the new hiring range”
I feel this is important, because that means that there’s still money within the HIRING range for my position, but that there could still be money on the table. (Technically, I should be eligible for a one-time bonus of $250 upon the completion of the first 6 months in my “new” position…)
tesyaa
Not to question your last statement, but if they really view you as irreplaceable, why would they offer you an insulting raise?
govt salary OP
that’s what I wonder too. I have gotten compliments on my staff reports, presentations and command during meetings from the town manager, council members, the mayor and the public.
I am thinking that I might try for 15-20%. And of course, I have no idea if there is more money on the table come January, when all of the comps, pay bands & maxes come out.
Toffee
TJ any suggestions for casual weekend skirts? The Old Navy jersey fold over skirt unfolds and just isn’t thick enough for me but I love how comfy it is. Thanks!
Medic Maggie
the “Whatever Skort” from Athleta. I love this and I wear it pretty much all the time on weekends in the summer.
Becky
Gap makes a foldover skirt that’s very similar to Old Navy’s (same parent company), but has a thicker material. It’s probably my favorite casual purchase this summer.
Flying Squirrel
I’m really liking the knit circle skirts from LOFT lately:
http://www.loft.com/knit-circle-skirt/339721?colorExplode=false&skuId=16582637&catid=catl000017&productPageType=fullPriceProducts&defaultColor=2100
Got tons of compliments!
Toffee
Perfect! Thank you. What’s the best price you’ve seen on this? I hate to pay full price at Loft.
Toffee
Never mind, just checked email. They have 40% off everything right now.
emeralds
I love that skirt!
Jules
Me too. Just visited here for a quick break, and now I have three skirts in a shopping cart!
Gail the Goldfish
Have you washed it yet? Any shrinking? I’ve had issues with a couple of skirts from Loft shrinking lately the first time I wash them, but they had some cotton in them.
Marilla
I bought two of these last year (in different patterns) and haven’t had issues with shrinking. I wash on cold/gentle and hang dry, though. The one I wear more often has pilled and faded a little bit, but not awfully. They’re super comfortable and appropriate for a more relaxed day at work and for weekends. And now I need to go buy more in other colours..
Bonnie
I have a few of these. They’re much thicker than the foldover skirts. They run long so I ordered the petite sizes. http://oldnavy.gap.com/browse/product.do?cid=1011457&vid=1&pid=967641092
Montreal
I know people have offered great recommendations for Montreal before, but I have a couple of specific questions I’d love advice about for our trip this weekend.
First, my husband wants to watch the US world cup game Sunday evening. We’re having dinner at L’Express, any suggestions of a bar we can head to in the same area to catch the game before dinner?
Second, rumor has it that there are some great BYOB options–any suggestions for a Saturday evening dinner? We have a back up reservation at Liverpool house, but might prefer something more low key..
Also, we are staying in old town and I’d love recs for great coffee/pastries or brunch nearby!
Blonde Lawyer
I’m checking my credit card statement from my trip to remember the places we went.
We ate at Liverpool House recently and it was amazing. My husband has also eaten at their other restaurant, Joe Beef. They are great with dietary issues if you have any.
We met friends at 3 Brasseurs. That was fun and had a good drink menu. We watched some hockey at Pub Burgendy Lion. Probably a good place to watch soccer. It is open air though so it may get hot. Le Cartet was great for brunch but a bit of a wait. I love Eggspectations but that is a chain so it might not be your thing. The food and service was great and the perfect atmosphere for a hangover. We had good sushi at Tokyo Sushi. For late night drinks ( like 2 am) we went to McLean’s Pub. Peel Pub is also pretty legendary and next store.
We stayed at Hotel Gault that also had a nice bar inside. It was a bit too trendy though. The beds were really short so my husband wasn’t a fan of that. We only stayed there because a friend had the room through work.
Marilla
+1 to Burgundy Lion, especially for soccer, but may be out of the way — I remember it being closer to Lionel-Groulx metro than really downtown.
AnonInfinity
You must go to Olive et Gourmando for brunch or lunch.
BB
Not much to add except Enjoy L’Express! Probably my favorite place in Montreal.
Also, it’s not near old town, but Fous Desserts has some of the best croissants ever and is worth a trip if you’re up that way.
Em
I’m planning to visit family in Vancouver in early July – any suggestions about things to do and restaurants? I’d like to walk around Chinatown and eat lots of Asian food (sadly lacking where I live). Also thinking about visiting Stanley Park and going to Grouse Mountain.
LT IT
I used to go to Vancouver often and one of my favorite things to do was to go up the tower downtown and eat at the revolving restaurant. The food is not all that but the views of the harbor and the mountains are amazing. Also Granville Island is fun for shopping and the food market. And if you have time, take a ferry over to Victoria. I always wanted to have high tea at the Empress hotel but never quite made it. I did do a killer whale-watching trip out of Victoria years ago though and that was pretty fun.
Em
Thanks so much! I think we’re going to go over to Vancouver Island as well, but I’m not sure precisely where. My aunt and uncle live right by Granville Island, so we’ll definitely go there – it looks amazing.
Lily student
I haven’t eaten at the revolving restaurant but going up the tower is great to orient yourself within the city. We went to a great restaurant called Cardero’s which is near the Westin Bayshore at Coal Harbor Quay, lovely for lunch. It’s worth getting the ferry to North Vancouver and mooching around the market
Undergarment Question
Does anyone know of a sleeveless (not tank) undergarment to wear under slightly sheer shirts? I have been wearing the basic cami, but don’t really like the lines it creates and would prefer something that just leaves the sleeves sheer. To clarify, I am not talking about a very sheer silk, but a work-appropriate white top that needs another layer so you are not looking at the outline of my bra.
tesyaa
Kat has featured some pricy but beautiful Adea items that would be perfect for this.
Undergarment Question
Thank you. The sleeveless layering top is exactly what I am looking for. Not a spaghetti strap or tank-style camisole. Now, if anyone has seen something less expensive, that would be great. May have to bite the bullet on this, though.
tesyaa
This is cotton and runs very small – order one size up even as an underlayer. They are nice quality layering shells:
http://www.beautyrose.com/kirislt.html
Undergarment Question
Amazing! Thank you. You’ve truly solved an ongoing wardrobe issue I have with shirts I particularly want to wear to court, so not a small issue.
Layering Tanks or Shells
I think LL Bean does a nice layering tank, also, check out Jockey.
Hollis
You may be conflating camis (which have the spaghetti straps) with tank tops (with thicker straps). The Shimera Tank top from Nordie’s might be what you are looking for. However, you did say “not tank”, but I’m not sure what other shirt would be sleeveless but not a tank, except for sleeveless shirts, like shells. I have a bunch of shells from J.Crew that normally go underneath matching cardigan sweaters, but I sometimes wear them as a base layer as well, but they are not meant to be “undergarments.”
Philanthropy Girl
Threadjack:
I just learned that there is an excellent job opportunity opening up at a local company. It has the potential for significant career growth, and I’ve been eyeing this department for a while. I have some minor irritations with my current position and haven’t been actively looking, but I’m starting to recognize that my career growth potential is severely limited, and I would make a move for a great opportunity. I’m a highly qualified candidate for this opening position, and would be an excellent fit in the company culture. I live in a small town, where word gets around, and I’d prefer to not discuss this with my boss until I’ve decided whether or not to apply.
The drawback: I’m currently 27 weeks pregnant in a high-risk pregnancy (meaning lots of extra medical care and no chance of being back to work in a few days). I know the head of the department and a number of other employees socially, so this isn’t something that I can hide or not discuss in a potential interview (I’m also huge…). It’s highly likely they would want me to start either right away, or right around the time I will be off for FMLA leave. So, the timing for me personally is terrible.
I’m meeting with this department head and would like to ask a few questions about the position, but I have no idea how to navigate my current medical status. Any suggestions on how to approach this situation?