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Updated: Oct 31, 2018 142 Comments · by

Tuesday’s TPS Report: Cap-Sleeve Stefan Sheath Dress

The Personal Shopper (TPS)

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Black Halo Cap-Sleeve Stefan Sheath Dress | CorporetteOur daily TPS reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices. I've featured something very similar to this one before, so I'm a bit surprised that this dress has a different style name (Stefan vs. Gypsy). I like the horseshoe neckline, the loose cap sleeves, and the concealed back zipper. As always, a sale never hurts — this one was $345, but is now marked to $209.59 at Amazon (eligible for Prime). Black Halo Cap-Sleeve Stefan Sheath Dress Here are a lower-priced alternative and plus-sized option. Seen a great piece you'd like to recommend? Please e-mail tps@corporette.com. (L-4)

Sales of note for 9.16.24

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Comments

  1. Anonny

    I like that dress… maybe not bright red, but would be perfect for my office.

    Cold weather people: If you’re wearing pants to work (trouser leg), in what footwear do you commute to work? Today it was frigid, but no snow so my big snow boots weren’t appropriate and I couldn’t commute in my typical flats with nylons/thin socks. I’m not sure if I should just buy something Ugg-like and concede style/my outfit for warmth on my walk (~15 minutes).

    • Cat

      Sperrys and mid weight black cotton socks (over my nylon-socks). Not Ugg-like levels of warmth, but I also have a <15 minute walk and am comfortable enough for that.

      • Anonny

        That’s exactly what I wore this morning and my toes are numb! Trust me, I will wear my Sperrys as long as humanly possible, but this Boston winter is going to be a rough one I think…

        • Cat

          ha – the benefits of a Philly winter rather than Boston – it was 20-25 this morning but that’s better than 4. On those super cold days I wear Hunters with the fleece liner, pants tucked in (folded neatly behind my calf so they don’t get rumply from the boots).

        • cbackson

          Ha, I have two different sets of Sperrys for different seasons (suede and woven leather).

    • SuziStockbroker

      I live somewhere were it is frigid. I wear my winter boots (not my big snow boots, I would not wear snow boots to the office) regardless of whether I am wearing pants or a skirt and tights. I peg the leg of the pants and tuck them in, then wear a long coat. This works when it is frigid with no snow, or cold with snow/slush and means yours pants never get salt or slush on them (the back of the bottom of your coat does but that is another issue).

      If your coat is not long enough to cover the pants tucked into boots situation then wear slim boots that fit under your pants, or flat ankle boots. For added warmth try a thermal insole (makes a big difference) and thin wool socks. I bought $10 thermal insoles this year and the difference is very noticeable.

      For reference it was below zero here this morning.

      • SuziStockbroker

        Ha ha, I end up doing the same thing. If I don’t have a client meeting first thing, they tend to stay on for awhile.

      • Killer Kitten Heels

        I don’t know if they specifically have them this season, but L.L. Bean also usually carries a boot or two with a similar appearance (warm and water resistant but not full-on snowboot and not Ugg-like), and I love L.L. Bean for quality.

      • Kady

        Those are cute. I have a pair with a similar look from La Canadienne that I use for my commutes.

    • Ellen

      Yay! I love this sheathe dress! It is so cute and the keyhole design does NOT expose to much for Frank to stare at. I will show Rosa and the manageing partner, b/c he LOVES when I wear red, even if NOT fire-engine RED b/c the judge love’s red for me also!

      Re the OP, yes, I wear Nike Air to work and now that it’s cold, I am weareing UGG boot’s b/c they are lined with SHEEP-SKIN. Yummy warm. The onley issue I have is that it is sueade, so I dare NOT step into anything b/c I can NOT wash the sueade boot’s. Today, it was VERY cold out so I was happy that I wore the UGGS. The manageing partner does NOT care, but he does NOT let me wear them during the day or out to lunch. I have 6 pair’s of pump’s in my drawer to handel this and to go to court, tho I have MASON carry them. He at least is good for something beside’s keeping Lynn warm at nite. It turned out Lynn was NOT pregeneent after all. She just was putteing on a lot of holiday pound’s — but well before the holiday. She must be keeping Mason happy, b/c he is alway’s over at her desk rather then working. FOOEY! Now that I am the co-chair of the department, I will have to figure out how to address his issue’s. For starter’s I think I will make him pass the NY Bar, tho it mean’s me giving him time off to study. If any one in the hive has dealt with this type of situation, I am all ear’s! DOUBEL YAY!!!!

    • anon-oh-no

      I just got a pair of sorels with a wedge. they are perfect for this purpose. They are super comfortable and still have all of the traction of a sorel, but the wedge keeps my pants from dragging on the ground. I wear them with heavy, warm socks

    • C

      I wear black ankle boots with wool socks and tights under my trousers for warmth. I’m an administrator at a university and frequently have to walk between buildings for meetings so wearing special commuting footwear and changing when I reach the office is not a good option for me.

    • Flower

      After living in New England for 4 years, I gave up on my policy of a single pair of winter boots. On cold days at the beginning of the season, I had a pair of mid-calf warm boots. They could handle small amounts of precipitation if it decided to suddenly snow but were mostly just to keep my feet warm and would fit under most trouser leg pants or I could fit my pants into them. Then I had my actual snow boots that were waterproof and extra warm for the rest of the winter when it was snowing or there was still snow on the ground or just giant puddles of horrible slush at every street corner. I would swap between those and my rain boots + liner depending on the cold vs. avoiding slush ratio.

    • Dana

      I wear tall suede Stuart Weitzman boots and skinny black trousers. I’ll wear them with below-the-knee leather and wool skirts, too. I think that, because they are fitted to the calf and have a bit of a heel on them, they’re on the dressier side as far as boots go. Also very easy to commute in (I walk half a mile to the train, then half a mile to work). Rubber soles.

      They are these exactly. Super pricy but I’ve seen similar styles available for a lot less. http://www.zappos.com/stuart-weitzman-coolboot-black-suede?ef_id=VF0X8AAAAW8ZCgYC:20150106184554:s

      For wide-leg trousers, I’ll either do a thick-heeled ankle boot or a wedge pump so that I don’t ruin the hems. Thinking of buying this pair, actually…

      http://www.zappos.com/clarks-azizi-isis-black-leather

    • lawsuited

      I just wear knee-high Uggs. On “polar vortex” days in Ontario, I’m already wearing a down parka, huge wool scarf, mitts and ear muffs, so style/outfit has been conceded.

  2. MJ

    I don’t even have b__bs and this dress makes me uncomfortable. Maybe bc I am short-waisted, but that neckline would be well into lack-of-cleavage territory for me, plus the red….nope.

    • CPA Lady

      Totally agree. I feel like Kat has featured about 10 dresses like this in the last few months. I know she probably hasn’t, but I always notice the “sheath dress with weird cut out or slit or other kind of neckline detail” because I had one, and while I liked the dress, I could never figure out what to wear over it. Both cardigans and blazers looked weird. This one is super low cut. Look at where her clavicle is and how deep that cutout is. It looks very Real Housewives to me.

      • Pretty Primadonna

        What to wear over this is an issue for me as well. I would probably just wear this dress (in a different hue!) as is, but that doesn’t work for sleeveless sheath dresses with interesting necklines.

    • SA-litagor

      My concern is the horseshoe cutout – that that screams weird under suit jacket to me. Why would I buy a dress that doesn’t look good under a suit jacket? Too many choices out there that don’t have that problem.

    • Bonnie

      This dress is gorgeous and I don’t think it’s too low cut at all. Actually made me pause when I saw it.

      • Lyssa

        I thought that, too (at least, for flat chested me, it looks like it would be fine). I also don’t think that it would look odd with a suit jacket. The color’s not to my taste and it’s outside of my price range, but I wouldn’t write it off for the shape/cut.

      • Topanga

        I love this dress as well! If it came in petite, I’d probably consider buying it.

      • hoola hoopa

        I also really like the dress. I could wear it without a jacket at my office, so the cut out isn’t an issue. As a buxom gal, I would need to try it on to verify, but I think in a petite it would cover enough. In navy or other more muted color I’d be happy to try.

  3. New Credit Card?

    Happy 2015 – Can anyone recommend a credit card with good service? I have had a Bank of America card for years, but had an issue with a hotel charge this past year and was surprised how poor their customer service was. I do a lot of travel (though not international) and use my card for almost every purchase. TIA!

    • LilyStudent

      I know almost nothing about US cards, but if you do a lot of leisure travel it might be worth looking for a card with cashback in the form of air-miles? The other approach to cashback credit cards is what my mum uses: she has a M&S credit card which gives cashback in M&S vouchers – so she never has to spend ‘real money’ on tights or socks!

    • CHJ

      American Express! They are the best for customer service, especially if you need to dispute a charge. If you travel a lot, check out the Starwoods card. If you prefer a no-fee card that still has a lot of features, check out the Blue card.

      • Anon in NYC

        I think the Amex Starwood card is consistently rated as one of the best cards in terms of the benefits you receive. Amex Platinum is fantastic, if you are willing to pay the fee. Amex is tricky in that smaller businesses may not accept it and you’ll need a backup card, but if you’re charging things from large businesses like hotel rooms and car rentals, you’ll be fine.

      • lucy stone

        The Starwood AmEx card is great! I put everything possible on it and earned enough points last year to pay for one-way airfare to a distant destination and three nights of free hotel. I’ve only used the customer service a few times but have never had a problem.

      • anonymous

        Isn’t amex the least widely accepted card? Do you find that’s not an issue?

        • SA-litagor

          About 1% of the transactions I do every month don’t accept AmEx. So it’s not a big deal, but you should always have a backup card.

        • nutella

          It used to be the case that it wasn’t accept, but I have rarely found that to be the case now. I use my Amex for everything and have a backup just in case. In 2014 I made a total of 3 charges to the backup to places where the Amex was not accepted — and I rarely carry cash.

    • In the Pink

      We have three different cards from Chase. They have been super the two times we’ve had fraudulent charges when travelling.

      Unfortunately, they only have a “chip” card, not a pin and chip – which would be preferred now with those sorts of machines/payments occurring internationally.

      • L

        For a counterpoint, I had a dispute with a vendor and paid with my Chase card. They were absolutely horrible to deal with and didn’t even let me submit my materials before closing the matter.

    • Blonde Lawyer

      I like the Chase Sapphire Preferred so far for travel though I haven’t had to dispute anything yet. I think the deal when we signed up was spend $3k in 3 months and get 40k in bonus points plus another 5k if you add an authorized user. You also get 2x points on travel and dining. If you book travel through their site with your points your points are worth 25% more. You should have enough for a free round trip just from the initial sign up deal. There is an annual fee ($95 I think) but it is waived the first year. They also have the online shopping portal where you get 7x points for Nordstrom as an example.

      I’ve heard that different BOA cards have different levels of customer service. I have their World Rewards card (taking a back seat to Chase at the moment) and have been overall very happy with their service. They have still pulled a few shady things but anytime I called and spoke to customer service my issue was resolved. Their online shopping portal offered a free shipping deal that JNY didn’t end up honoring. Rather than dispute it with JNY they just gave me a statement credit for what I paid in shipping. There was also an issue with my closing date changing at one point and even though I paid my card in full each month I was getting charged interest. I called and they explained what had happened, gave me a list of the closing dates going forward (they weren’t the same each month) and refunded any interest I had paid in the last few months (since the time their policy had changed.) You might want to try a different tier of their card and you can probably switch w/ your current account so you maintain your long customer history.

      • AnonLawMom

        This. I’ve had mine for over a decade and have had nothing but positive experiences. The rates and fees and all of that are competitive and the customer service is up to Nordstrom standards. The Nordstrom Notes are also so fun!

    • Bonnie

      The Chase Sapphire card has become my primary card. I’ve used my points to buy several plane tickets and love that they give you a discount off published fares and are very easy to deal with. They also don’t charge foreign transaction fees which is a huge plus if you travel.

    • Anon

      USAA if you’re eligible. I had fraud on my account and was amazed and how easy the process was. I have also had insurance and loans through them and have never had a negative experience with their customer service.

    • AIMS

      If you travel internationally even once a year, you should get a card that doesn’t charge foreign transaction fees. Capital One is pretty good for this and we’ve never had problems with their service before (SO has had the card for years and they’ve been there through more than one issue). Amex is good, too, but you need to have a back up as noted above (though on the flip side, I’ve also been to places that ONLY take amex, and it’s been nice to have the card in those circumstances).

  4. anon

    Hi Ladies, I’ve accidentally found myself up against the old boys club. I provided a preliminary analysis before a meeting with a company. Long story short they canceled the meeting and stole my analysis which they are now using. Can I bill them as the analysis was under the conditionality of a meeting? Should I just cut my loss and warn everyone?
    Thanks

    • NYNY

      What did your contract say? Were there contingencies in it for how you charge them if you provide the analysis and don’t meet? I’m assuming that if you had enough data to provide an analysis, you must have also signed a non-disclosure agreement, so “warning everyone” may be an issue.

      Depending on your agreement, you may have to chalk this up as lessons learned and move on.

      • anon

        The NDA is only in regards to privillaged info no defamation clause or anything so I am within legal bounds to tell people the company does shady business. The owner also lacks any specialized skills so I have a feeling the reason he is so successful (despite being dumb as nails) is because he steals work regularly and no one cares to challenge him.

    • Blonde Lawyer

      I’m not in your line of work but have you tried pushing back tactfully? You could say “I provided that in anticipation of our meeting. I would not have provided it if you were cancelling the meeting. We need to proceed under our original plan or I will need to bill you x accordingly.” If they say that’s not in your agreement and it actually isn’t you will likely have to let it go but if you try calling them on their actions they might try to save face and say “oh, we of course were still going to pay you” or something like that to smooth it over. Sometimes these people are just testing what they can get away with.

    • Anonymous

      Do you want to work again? This seems really stupid. You’re going to go around telling people that you gave work for free to someone everyone knows steals work regularly? It doesn’t paint a good picture of your judgment. Chalk it up as a lesson.

      • anon

        Its not widely known that they steal, and the work wasn’t free they broke our contract. Seeing what is going on I have a suspicion that this is what they do. I’m not sure whether I should fight it or not… Thanks for your assumptions though

        • Anonymous

          If you have a contract that provides for payment for this work then yes, obviously, send them a bill. But spreading muck around about them is inevitably going to rub off on you.

    • AnonLawMom

      I would absolutely bill them for the time but be prepared to take it a step further if you don’t get a good first response (i.e., head into litigation territory). If you have any lawyer friends or colleagues, have them take a look at your contract/NDA to give you some advice on where you stand from a legal perspective.

  5. New SalesWoman

    What books/resources do you recommend as I learn to sell for my new promotion (30% of which is supposed to be business development)? I’m a technical consultant. We do have a in-house sales program that I’ll go through shortly. I’m an extrovert, love to meet people and connect and I’m good at that. But I’m bad/not experienced at getting to the next level – let’s negotiate, let’s seal the deal. I have never done this before, and there are very few contexts in my life where I feel comfortable doing this, much less at work, representing my firm. What do you recommend as I move into this next step? Thank you, Wise Women of C0rp0r3tt3

    • CherryScary

      I highly recommend The Challenger Sale, particularly if you are selling complex products (which it sounds like you may be!) They have a lot of discussions about identifying your sales style and how to place yourself as a teacher and insight-bringer.

      • Anon

        +1 on The Challenger Sale. You might also want to check out CEB, as they have some programs that are targeted for Insight Selling etc that are complimentary to what is in The Challenger Sale. My company uses it and it has really worked for us.

  6. Charlotte, NC

    Hi ladies. I will be in Charlotte for work this week and am looking for suggestions for a great place to eat lunch. I know next to nothing about Charlotte, so any recommendations would be greatly appreciated!

      • Charlotte, NC

        I’m not really familiar with the area, but it looks like I will be near Southpark Mall. But I will have a rental car, so I can get around easily if there is someplace worth checking out.

        • queen city anon

          If you can get to Elizabeth (a neighborhood), Fig Tree was a favorite of the Homeland cast when they filmed there.

          In southpark, Roosters (in a strip across from the mall).

    • ACD

      Charlotte is great! I second Fig Tree, which is really good. If you want to stick near SouthPark, my favorite around there is Cowfish, which is a nutso-but-amazing sushi and burger bar — if that doesn’t immediately turn you off, you should check it out!

      Not for lunch, but if you get a chance, The Wooden Vine is a spectacular little wine bar/tapas place in Uptown.

      • queen city anon

        If you Google Helen Schwab and “best of”, she covers the restaurant beat here and just did a best of new restaurants column.

  7. Greige

    Career TJ! I am a relatively recent law grad and I have been working in a tangentially related role (think JD preferred, not required) for about 2 years. I have been very lucky in that I make good money at this job and have a lot of responsibility, but I’m not a “lawyer” and I don’t particularly like it here. Sometime soon I am expecting an offer for a government attorney position that would be a $30-40k pay cut. I can afford it, I have been told that I could make that up in several years due to the nature of the position (something about promotion potential).

    So I guess my question is this- is it worth a huge pay cut just to actually be a lawyer? Both jobs are in the same industry, and my end goal is to be in house and/or an executive eventually. For background, I’ve been searching for about a year and the legal market in my area is abysmal.

    • LeChouette

      I think only you can answer this question, as its really a matter of your priorities…if your goal is to be in house or executive, it seems to me like this government job isn’t a logical stepping stone as what you might need, depending on the type of in house position you seek, is more business experience than government experience. If your goal is to go in house in compliance, then the government experience may be worth it enough that it would compensate for the paycut.

    • mascot

      If your goal is to use your law degree as a lawyer, even in-house, I think you need to find lawyer jobs. My concern is that you will get pigeon holed and have a much harder time getting a lawyer job the further you get from law school.

      • ac

        +1 – if you want to work as a lawyer at some point, you need to get into a lawyer role in your first few years. If you have never practiced law in the first 5 years of your post-law school career, I think it’s frankly very unlikely you’ll ever be hired as a lawyer.
        If this is a role where you expect to learn a lot, it could definitely be worth the paycut.

    • Anonymous

      If you want to be a lawyer take the job. It’s just going to get harder as you spend more and more time falling behind.

      • anon a mouse

        This. Especially if you are in a non-lawyer job now. Government jobs tie salary to years of experience as a practicing lawyer.

    • Bonnie

      If you don’t like the work you’re doing, now is the right time to take a pay cut and explore other options. If you stay out of the legal market too long, you will not be employable as a lawyer.

    • Anon

      Your post seems vague about why you want this new position. I would consider why you want to be a lawyer. Is it just because you worked so hard in law school or paid so much money for the degree and don’t want to “waste” your JD? All of my law school friends who are really happy with their jobs are not working as lawyers (myself included). I got a job at the most prestigious law firm in my state and realized I hated it and was lucky that I landed a non-attorney job in a related field that matched my pay. I have a friend right now who is trying to get out of her position in a firm because she realized she hates being a lawyer. If you really like being a lawyer and the work (and many people do), then I agree that you are better off getting into an attorney position now before you are out of the legal market too long. But I would strongly caution you against accepting an attorney position just for the sake of having the title – for some people the cost of that title is happiness, work-life balance, and job satisfaction.

      • Greige

        Thank you. The truth is I thought I didn’t want to be a lawyer after interning at a firm, but turns out I don’t like this job any more than I liked the firm. Now I feel like I have peaked in my current field and in the long term I would make more as a lawyer, but with no crystal ball I might be way off. I figure if I’m not going to like my job I should at least maximize my earnings.

        • pickle

          I love my government lawyer job. However, making money should not be your primary objective when entering public service. I could have made more money (but would have been less satisfied) had I continued with my private sector business career instead of going to law school.

          • Wildkitten

            I agree with pickle. Go to the government job if you want to be a lawyer. Don’t work for the government if you want to get rich.

    • Killer Kitten Heels

      If you want to be a lawyer, you have to, well, be a lawyer, you know? You’re early enough in your career to make the jump (obviously, since you already have the new offer) without it being a big deal that you started out as a non-lawyer, so I’d say if “lawyer” is your end goal (or is a requirement for your end goal), it’s worth it to make the jump now.

      • Hollis

        +1000. I’ve taken 3 paycuts, but my career is now on-track and I actually look forward to going to work as I enjoy what I do.

    • AnonLawMom

      Do it. It gets harder and harder to take that kind of pay cut the farther you get in your career. It sounds like you are currently in a position where there is little room to grow, which is not good for as young as you are. The switch gives you the opportunity to progress in your career for a long time. One of the things I found interesting in Gretchen Rubin’s Happiness Project book is that happiness is tied more strongly to improvement over time rather than objective financial success. So for example, a person is happier if they make $60K then $70K then $80K over three years than if they made $80K the whole time. It also sounds like if you make the switch and hate it there may be an opportunity to go back to your current role. Take the risk.

  8. Marie

    I skimmed over a discussion of books yesterday, but I’m looking for something a little different – specifically, I’m looking for recommendations for my new Audible credits. I love listening to audiobooks-for commuting, while working out, and while cooking or doing chores around the house. I like both fiction and nonfiction, but some books just translate to audio better, and the quality of the narration is important.

    For memoirs and biographies, I’ve recently enjoyed Call the Midwife by Jennifer Worth, Bad Feminist by Roxane Gay, Inters*x by Thea Hillman, and American Savage by Dan Savage. For nonfiction I liked the Feminine Mystique and The Warmth of Other Sons–I also listened to Alexander Hamilton by Ron Chernow but thought it was a little long to work well for audio. Fiction I’ve enjoyed on audiobook: The Telling by Ursula Le Guin, Glorious by Bernice McFadden, The Handmaid’s Tale by Margaret Atwood, and Over Sea Under Stone by Susan Cooper.

    Looking over all these, I guess I can identify something of a feminist trend, but I’m more interested in solid prose and a good story than a feminist narrative necessarily. Any ideas?

    • CPA Lady

      I recently listened to To Kill a Mockingbird narrated by Cissy Spacek. You’ve probably already read it, but if you haven’t (or even if you have) I really enjoyed listening to it and was so depressed when it was over. I’m from Alabama and nothing annoys me more than listening to someone try to talk in a southern accent like it’s a foreign language, and I didn’t find Cissy’s accent or voice distracting from the story.

    • Audio books!

      I’ve recently gotten into audio books. I loved “The Invention of Wings.” It fits your criteria, and the narrators are great.

      I’m about 20% through “The Signature of All Things” and I looooove the narrator. I like the story, but some recent parts have been making me wonder whether I’ll end up liking the book overall. There’s a definite style to the prose that is starting to get grating — lots of short sentences to show the passage of time and now a distracting plot development that I hope isn’t carried throughout.

    • roses

      If you like memoirs that have a bit of comedy thrown in, I recommend Tina Fey’s Bossypants (narrated by her). Hilarious, well-written and has a pinch of feminism.

      • Fishie

        I liked Amy Poehler’s book too – lots of giggling! And some fun audio-only extras (her parents, Carol Burnett, Kathleen Turner, live audio of her reading a chapter at a comedy club).

        • emily

          Also funny and well-narrated is One More Thing by BJ Novak (Ryan the temp from The Office) – mostly really well done stories, and he narrates most of them, along with a great cast of guest stars including lots of actors from The Office.

      • mintberrycrunch

        +1. Bossypants is my favorite audiobook yet. I laughed out loud multiple times. I also liked Mindy Kaling’s audiobook. I found Amy Poehler’s to be a little hard to follow in audio format, because she doesn’t have a very linear style, but she’s also funny.

        I also really like Malcolm Gladwell’s audio books. He narrates, and he has a great voice and pacing.

      • hoola hoopa

        On a similar comedic note, I’ve heard that Martin Short’s memoire (narrated by himself) is hilarious in audiobook.

        Not sure it’s your style, but I enjoy the Michael Palin travel logs. He was in Monty Python, so he’s good with his voice. His travels are quite interesting as well.

        • Trixie

          I’m listening to Martin Short’s book now and it’s quite good. Craig Ferguson’s autobiography is amazing and he reads it very well. I just finished Cary Elwe’s telling of the making of The Princess Bride. The audio is even better than the book…not only is he reading it, many of his costars voice their own bits. Last year I also enjoyed Doris Kearns Goodwin’s Franklin Roosevelt book (narrated by the late Edward Herrmann. Great, though abridged) and Ron Guidry’s charming Driving Mr Yogi. The Michael Palin book is good, and if you like British entertainers/comedians/media types, Jennifer Saunders, David Mitchell, Graham Norton & Omid Djalilli (think I’ve butchered the spelling) all have entertaining ones out.

    • Blonde Lawyer

      I enjoyed Tina Fey’s book, Bossypants and Sheryl Sandberg’s via audiobook. The Help was also great with the narration told in different voices. I recently listened to Seven Magic Works by Tim David and loved it. Full disclosure, the author is a family friend which is why I was initially interested in the book. However, I would recommend it either way. He is a magician/mentalist now corporate motivational speaker. He teaches about how the way we say something is what really matters. It is great for anyone that needs to negotiate or fundraise. One small example from the book – our brains forget what comes before a “but.” It is better to say “I know money is tight but we could really use a small donation” rather than “we could really use a small donation but we know money is tight.” The first is far more likely to get you a donation though the message is the same.

      I like the new kindle option where you get both the text and audible so you can switch back and forth. I can read in a waiting room but listen on my commute.

      • Pink

        Second Bossypants as an audiobook! So fun!

        Also, if Mindy Kaling also narrates her book, I could totally get into that.

        • mindy mouse

          Yes, Mindy Kaling does narrate her book and it’s great! I also enjoyed listening to Bossypants.

          Other author/narrators I enjoy: Sarah Vowell and David Sedaris (sometimes Amy Sedaris joins in).

    • cbackson

      I loved How to Be a Woman, but other people didn’t – it’s fairly brash (and occasionally vulgar) in tone, which ordinarily wouldn’t be my style, but I thought it was hilarious.

      Also, if you liked Over Sea, Under Stone, I would check out the rest of her series (The Dark is Rising) – it’s SO GOOD. And you would probably like Robin McKinley (The Hero and the Crown and The Blue Sword are my favorites, but truthfully, I love them all).

    • Bonnie

      Less serious but Where’d You Go Bernadette was very enjoyable as an audio book.

    • AnonLawMom

      I’m currently listening to The Charisma Myth on Audible and find it very fascinating and useful.

    • Jules

      It’s been out for a while, of course, but if you haven’t read it, try Stieg Larsson’s Millennium Trilogy (first book is the Girl with the Dragon Tattoo), which is really good in its audio form.

  9. Batgirl

    Any reading suggestions for managing staff? I’m relatively new to it and already feel like I’ve made some mistakes I’d like to undo. Nothing major, but I would love to take a fresh approach. I’m more interested in a book than a website, but I’ll take whatever advice you’ll offer! Thanks!

  10. Marie

    Sorry for the second post so quickly, but I also have an unrelated career question. Not for myself but for my mom. She is interested in meeting with a career counselor but doesn’t know how to find one. Where is a good place to start? What criteria should she look for? Does the person have to be local to her or have people had good experiences with remote advising? Are there any certifications she should look for? What would some red flags be? Any other info I can pass along? She is located in Florida, if anyone has any specific recommendations there. She doesn’t use corporette but asked me to ask here for her.

    • Idea

      There are non-profits that accept clients that can pay – does that make sense? Here in Atlanta the Jewish Family & Career Services is a nonprofit that helps everybody – if you can pay, you do. There are career counselors there that help and can point you in the right direction. Also, does she have any alumnae affiliations? That is a good place to start, too – even if she’s 50+ years out, the career services department for students and graduates should be able to help.

  11. Ciao, pues

    Guys. My office is SO MESSY. I found myself up against a time crunch at the end of the year when normally slow days make for good office cleaning so it didn’t get done. It feels terrible to start the year under such a pile of crud: desk piled with paper, post-its with things not to forget everywhere, shoes (oh! the shoes!), one empty wall I meant to put something on, and still haven’t emptied out the boxes I moved when I got a new office several months ago. On top of it all, my plant is dying. Help!

    • Anonymous

      Girl. Get a grip! You can do this. Right now pick up your plant and either water it or throw it away.

      Put a pair of shoes in your purse right now. Bring them home tonight. You know you only wear that one pair anyway.

      Collect every single post it you can touch from your chair, stack them neatly, and put them in one place.

      Maximum 7 minutes and you are on your way.

      • L

        Also, grab some folders and take the piles (if they’re sorted) and shove them into folders. If they’re not sorted, shove them into one folder and leave the rest under it. Then when you need the Smith notes and you dig through your one big folder (as opposed to the pile on your desk) you can create a new folder, label it, and throw it in there when you’re done. Folders look neater than piles and eventually when you have to dig for notes, you can sort it out.

    • Anonymous

      *looks over shoulder to see if you are standing in my office*

      If it makes you feel better, I have two dead cactuses sitting in pots on my windowsill. They’ve been dead for months. #aredeadplantsprofessional?

    • TO Lawyer

      You need to attack this systematically. Don’t get overwhelmed by everything at once!
      Step 1: paper/post-its. If you don’t need the posts-it anymore, get rid of them. If you do, transfer them all to a legal pad or stack them in one pile for now. The paper needs to be stacked according to file/project and if you don’t need them, either recycled/shredded or filed.

      Step 2: Shoes are easy – do you have a spare drawer? That’s a good way to get them out of the way. In the alternative, a banker box or just line them up neatly.

      Now that the easy stuff is done and you have a little more room, you can worry about the boxes and the empty wall. Just take it one step at a time.

    • Sunshine

      Yep, I realized this yesterday. It shocked me to see just how many piles of stuff were on my desk. I was off over the holiday and we had a very busy week before Christmas, so the usual cleanup didn’t happen. I plan to block my Friday afternoon to clean it all up.

    • Ciao, pues

      Great news: I think the plant is going to survive. UnF***ing my office 7 minutes at a time. Thanks, all!

  12. excellence

    I know we have talked about this before but the search is not bringing anything up for me. Can people please tell me the places they love/things to do in Charleston, SC? It would be for a girls weekend in May. Thank you!

    • sweetknee

      Take a cooking class at Charleston Cooks ( good food, hands on experience, fun !), tour Middleton Place Plantation; go shopping on King Street. Eat at High Cotton, SNOB ( Slightly North of Broad) or Magnolia’s. Good brunch at Toast on Meeting Street. … (yum Bacon Bloody Marys). Take a historical horse and carriage tour (a little cheesy but fun). If rainy, go the Aquarium. There is also a hotel with a nice rooftop bar. . .can’t remember the name right now. . .

      I am a native South Carolinean, and have done all of these things.

      • sweetknee

        Make sure you watch out in May.. there is an arts festival there called Spoleto…. it goes on almost all month, and prices and reservations are difficult to come by.

    • NatalieR

      Westbrook Brewery is just north of Charleston in Mt. Pleasant, if you like microbrews.

      I really like the restaurants/shops on Sullivan’s Island – we especially enjoyed Poe’s Tavern and Salt at Station 22.

      I like to stay on Isle of Palms. There are many houses and condos right on the water. It’s quieter than some of the other beaches (Folly, in my mind is the “fun” beach) and only about half an hour from downtown. There’s a great seafood market on IoP, so we’ll load up on seafood and cook dinner a couple of nights, then have drinks on the patio and watch the waves.

      Downtown Charleston has a ton of great shopping and restaurants. I’d consult Yelp, as well as Southern Living/Garden and Gun for write ups and recs.

      Enjoy!

  13. Mommy Monster

    To the many readers on this site who have recommended it over the years, thank you! I finally picked up “The Gift of Fear” and am finding it a fascinating read.

    Also, a little celebration: my novel just got its first (and unexpected) review on Amazon and it’s a 5-star one!

  14. Zelda

    PSA for Atlanta r#ttes:

    Classpass has finally come to Atlanta and I’m already in love! I’ve already taken a spinning class and a barre class. They’re normally about $25/each, so $80/month for Classpass is totally worth it. It’s a bit of a drag that you can only take 3 classes at each gym, but it also pushes me to vary my workouts and try different things that I normally wouldn’t.

    • tesyaa

      I don’t love how the change in fabric hits right around the middle – it might emphasize the middle area where you don’t want it to.

      • Wildkitten

        I’d want to try it on to see how the fabric changes look on your specific body. You can always order it, try it on, and return it, to see in real life if it’s magical or horrible.

    • pearls

      I like the back view, the front could work on some…….but I’m not clear how the front and back work together, visually. How does it appear from the sides????

    • Samantha

      I’m pear-shaped and I would hesitate to get this because the pattern seems to draw the eye to the hips rather than the waist, not what I want to emphasize.

      • hoola hoopa

        This.

        I’m intrigued. It seems like something that, if successful, would be really different without being too crazy – but a complete disaster otherwise. Since it looks like all sizes are fully stocked on clearance, I’d guess it’s the later. And it’s poly/viscose.

    • Brit

      To me, it looks a bit like someone just took whatever scrap fabric they had from previous projects and made a dress out of it.

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