Coffee Break: Ankle Strap Point Flats

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1. Has anyone here tried the new Marine Layer Allison trousers (wide leg)? They are calling to me but I don’t see any promo codes right now. Wondering if I should just do it. Thanks!

2. Hello ladies! Any recommendations for fresh resume templates? I’m going to throw my hat in the ring for a new role and my resume from 7 years ago that was a fast update of my resume from 17 years ago definitely screams “This girl hasn’t updated her resume format in 17 years!”

   Related question: When the application asks if I have a disability do I check the box? I have one of the disabilities the application specifically mentions, but it is a managed situation that I will not seek an accommodation for. Typically I wouldn’t check the box, but the hiring manager is aware of the situation.

   1. there are websites that do it for you, you type in your info and it formats etc. good luck!

      1. this is terrible advice. i agree with the advice below that simple and consistent formatting is best and you don’t want fancy formats bc many ATS cannot properly parse them. good luck!

      2. This is NOT terrible advice. Look for a website that provides output that isn’t heavy on graphic design. I’m not the one who made the suggestion. But I did this and ended up with a really clean look that didn’t re-format every time it hit the ATS system. The reason they are templates is that they are ATS-friendly.

   2. I always check the box in case I need reasonable accommodations at some future point.

   3. I did a resume refresh earlier this year and learned that simple really is best. I transitioned from a 2 column format to a 1 column format and got positive responses.

   4. This obviously varies at different employers, but at mine, this information is kept completely separate from information on people applying, as in we know what % of people applying identified as disabled, female, Black, etc., but we don’t know who is who when we’re reviewing applications or if you get hired and you need accommodations (that’s a separate process). So it makes absolutely no difference except in diversity statistics and meeting requirements for receiving federal funding. For the sake of accuracy, you should check the box. But it’s certainly possibly this could differ elsewhere and there could be other ramifications, as disability stigma is unfortunately still very real.

   5. I got laid off earlier this year after being employed for 20+ years. Definitely go with a simple format. This is what mine has:

      – Name, city, state, phone and email at top. I also added my LinkedIn profile link. I didn’t include my full address.
      – Profile section with a few bullet points highlighting my experience
      – Areas of Expertise – I work as a business analyst supporting software developers so I have some tech related stuff I put here
      – Professional Experience – include bullet points and do your best to quantify the work you did with percentages, etc. Honestly I didn’t have exact numbers so I made a best guess. There’s no way a company is going to verify those internal values at another company.
      – Education at the bottom. No dates

      Keep it a single column. I save it as a PDF for uploading to sites.

   6. I typically don’t check the disability box because I’ve worked with so many prejudiced people that it’s too big a risk.

   7. I don’t answer the disability or race questions, and their existence on applications is a big turnoff to me as a candidate. There is a huge difference between “do you require any accomodations during the interview process” and “do you fill a quota.”

      1. They have to ask in many (most) situations so I wouldn’t ding the asker. I’m a cancer survivor and I always answer prefer not to answer.

3. Please share stories of adopting a workout routine and getting in shape starting in your 40s or later.

   1. I don’t have a great story per se. There’s no magic to it. I started with regular yoga (because I paid for it, and that motivates me), and then on days I didn’t do yoga I committed to walking 3 miles. That’s now turned into running.

      And it’s worked — I feel good, my numbers are good, and I look good. But I drag myself out on days I don’t want to do it because I’ve prioritized this. I don’t beat myself up when something gets in the way, but I’m all too aware of the trap where things can get in the way day after day after day.

      So I do it, even when I don’t really feel like it. And that’s what’s key — do something every day. It doesn’t have to be awful or horribly strenuous. You could walk and do body-weight strength training at home. But cardio & strength (and stretch, too!) just has to be incorporated as you get older.

      1. I’m awful because paying for it doesn’t motivate me.

   2. Mountain biking theme since it’s my favorite sport:

      My dad has mountain biked since his 30s (when it was a new sport) and he had to take a long hiatus due to multiple surgeries and health problems in his early 60s. He’s now in his late 60s and riding up to 5 days per week again. The key is consistency and going with friends. He does NO strength training (I wish he would), but he absolutely loves the biking and it’s something we can enjoy together. Several of his friends he rides with are in their mid-70s.

      Betty Birrell is a slightly more famous example due to her viral Patagonia short film, North Shore Betty. She picked up mountain biking at age 45 and is still riding advanced trails at age 76. Check out her video on YouTube if you want some real inspiration.

      One thing I’ll note is that a positive attitude really matters. If you approach it thinking “I’ll get hurt” or “I’m too old,” it will become a self-fulfilling prophecy. Don’t walk around assuming the worst when it comes to your fitness and you’ll find what you can stick with over time.

      1. My mountain bike group (all ladies) has some women in their mid 60s who crush the climbs and always beat those of us who are 20 years younger. It’s such an inspiration and makes me want to keep up with this great sport. I’m a cautious mountain biker so I’m usually the last one both up and down, but I have gained so many fantastic friendships through biking.

   3. I highly recommend finding a specialty gym, at least to start. Check out Orangetheory, Burn Bootcamp, F45, etc. All of these (especially OTF and Burn) are scalable and most classes are largely female (especially at Burn). Sign up for an intro. Meet the trainer and tell them you’re new. Commit to two classes a week and walk in between. Aim for 7500 steps a day at least.

      1. I started Orangetheory in my forties. I’m not kidding when I say it’s been life changing in terms of my daily health, stamina, energy, and confidence. I turn 50 this month and am in the best shape of my adult life.

   4. I planned a trip to Paris and realized I wasn’t in good enough shape to spend 6 hours a day walking so I started walking every day after work. Built up from 30 slow minutes to 45 fast minutes and j love it!

   5. Pure Barre. I love it, have noticed changes (core, arms and butt especially.) I mostly do classic and align for classes and even though I don’t chat much with other there, it also feels like a social outlet. Bought an unlimited membership.

      1. Pure barre definitely whips you into shape! It helped my arms abs and bum. I also mix in running and yoga. I also know several people that started running marathons after 45.

      2. I love Pure Barre. My studio has such a good vibe–women of all ages and sizes. I worked out before but Pure Barre pushes me to another level.

         1. I’ll add that my mom started going to her senior center for exercise classes at 77 after hearing me rave about going to Pure Barre. She’s always been active but she also said her classes have pushed her to another level and she has more stamina now. So you can really do it any age!

   6. I started a walking routine when I was in my early 50s after a serious health issue sidelined me from about 40 to 51. I finally managed to get on the right combination of medications and my nurse suggested I start walking. I was seriously deconditioned. I started by literally walking down my driveway and back up the driveway every day. I still remember the first day I walked a mile — I got a mile from my house and had to call my son to pick me up because I had forgotten to plan to get home. I then added yoga, starting with a class one evening a week, then added a Sunday afternoon class and then a Saturday evening class. After 2 years, and losing 85 lbs, my kids convinced me to start using the weight machines at the gym they went to. I started using a few of the machines 2x a week. When I started using the weights I started cleaning up my diet, adding protein and fiber and actually thinking about what I was eating. My weight stayed the same — 80 lbs down from my highest and about the same weight I was when I was 25 — but my body started looking more muscular. I was walking 10k steps 7 days a week, doing weights 2x a week, and yoga 3x a week. When the pandemic shut down the gyms, I bought a set of resistance bands to use at home (the Gorilla Bow to be exact) and now do resistance training 4 times a week, walk 7 times a week, and yoga 3 times a week. I’m 10 years in and have kept the weight off, and the walking is as important to my mental health as it is to my physical health.

      1. Wow, this is very inspiring! Congratulations!

      2. This is great! Kudos to you. The weights are really important for aging so this is really great.

   7. I’m 47 and didn’t start working out regularly until I started WFH in 2020. First thing is to figure out what you like doing. I get bored of exercise machines and don’t like working out in front of people. I started doing workout videos on Fitness Blender. I can work out in the comfort of my own home and don’t have to figure out a routine on my own.

      I did their free videos for a long time and recently signed up for FB+. I usually do one of their workout programs. The video is picked out for me each day and all I have to do is show up. I’ve found that I really like strength training.

      I started just doing a couple of workouts a week and now I do 4 a week and sometimes five. I’m a morning workout person and have to get it done first thing otherwise I just won’t do it.

   8. For me? Working out in my mid 40s got way easier when I realized I don’t need to push myself to the brink of passing out in order for a workout to be good. A very slow jog that keeps my heart rate in zone 2 (rather than hovering between 185-190 bpm while I struggle to breathe), a weight lifting circuit with small enough hand weights that I can feel the motion without being so sore I can’t function, a long walk with my spouse after dinner, all of those are valid. I don’t have to train like an elite athlete in order to get in some exercise.

      1. +1000. This mindset change has been huge for one of my best friends and I’ve seen how much it has helped her.

   9. I am anonymous for this. At 45 I started strength training and macros counting with an amazing coach. I pay a few hundred a month, which I know is a luxury, but it’s one-on-on with nearly daily guidance on videos of my 5x weekly weightlifting workouts and feedback on my nutrition and general well-being as I strive for a healthier self. I also walk 10k plus steps daily, and complete 25 minute cardio workouts 2x weekly.

      I believe in you. You can do this. Focus on your “why” – why do you want to get in shape? Write it down and re-read it to yourself. That answer to the “why” question will serve as your north star when you don’t want to move your body, get out of bed in the morning, etc. The second advice is to find something you enjoy and do that thing and another thing to mix it up. Is it lifting weights, salsa dancing, cardio, biking?

      What motivated this was feeling lethargic all the time, not feeling pretty in my beautiful body, worried about what my biomarkers would show at annual physical examinations, and knowing that I wanted to be more active with my friends and family now and in the future. I am 1.5 years into my journey. I feel and look better than I was at 25. I lost 27 pounds and have kept it off, gained muscle and changed my body composition, have way more energy than ever before, and my mental health is improved. I hadn’t lifted weights since high school.

      There is no time like today – get started now and you will thank yourself next time this year. The path to self-improvement is not linear (I had a shoulder injury, scary infectious disease, family drama, work stresses) but my consistency and commitment even on days when all I wanted was to curl up into a ball has yielded positive results.

   10. I just needed out of the house during the pandemic. Walks turned to increasingly long runs, which then turned into races (10ks then half then full) as things started opening up. Now, I have a crew of friends who were in a similar boat that we travel a few times a year for various races. Beyond that, biggest thing I learned is that you can say no to things you don’t like workout wise (and probably life wise too). Years ago, at an adult ballet class, a grey haired woman told me, I have always hated this step, and it’s my choice to be here, so I won’t do it.

   11. Finding a fitness class that is a fun hobby and not just exercise is key for me. At various times I’ve been into Les Mills, adult ballet, yoga, and muay thai.

   12. I started using a personal strength trainer twice a week and it made such a difference in my ability to do more things like cycling or rowing eventually. He knows when I’m plateauing and need to go up in weights or add more complexity, it’s the kind of strength training that is a lot of body weight, core focused, complex movements and we never do the same routine twice, so lots of variety. I was always a walker, but added cycling and enjoyed it enough once I found the right bike (which is crucial) that I started going longer and more often (and became a n+1 bike person). I did Orange Theory for a while which I enjoyed but during the pandemic added a water rower to my basement workout room which also has a treadmill and some TRX straps/dumbbells. I like rowing because it’s a total body workout and I like the sound of the water rower. I work from home and find that having equipment in the house lends itself to 15 minute sessions that can be done multiple times a day – 15 minutes in the morning, 15 minutes in the afternoon, etc. or 10/10/10. Doing 5 minutes on the rower, five minutes on the treadmill to add up to 30 minutes while I watch something on the TV also makes the time go faster. I do use Fitness Blender if I want to switch it up sometimes. And 10 minutes of HIIT on a rower will absolutely kick you! All this to say a blend of paying for skill and accountability, a variety of activities, and flexibility and convenience (equipment in the house) so it’s as easy as possible to get to really works for me. And I’m 65 started this about ten years ago, and I’m in the best shape I’ve been since my late 20s and definitely the strongest I’ve ever been which is such a huge help in managing aging.

4. different things motivate different people but i hadn’t done anything so regular for a few years (although i’m reasonably motivated and active) but about 6 months ago i signed up for orangetheory and the accounatabity of seeing that i have paid for classes and need to schedule makes me go. doesn’t have to be orangetheory, whatever you are into– zumba, yoga, would work.

5. does anyone else have a hobby that crosses into hyperfixation? how do you pull yourself back? signed, ADHDer who likes growing flowers and has bought about 300 seed packets in the past week and now has to enter them all onto my spreadsheet

   1. lol yes! I am a hobby collector and tend to go all in. I have just accepted this about myself and allow it to happen. I do try to be mindful about not buying a ton of stuff so that I don’t end up with an expensive but useless pile of stuff when I abandon the endeavor.

      My boyfriend also gets hyper fixated but he sticks to the same few hobbies (including gardening). It doesn’t adversely affect either of our lives, so we go with it!!

   2. Yes I love hobbies. I have a lot. They bring me so much joy and are generally a better use of my time than watching TV in the evenings so I’m happy to spend the money on them.

      Mine are mostly athletic or things that get me out of the house, like quizzo but I also dabble in different crafts, I read a ton, and enjoy home improvement (apartment improvement) projects.

      I’m not good at most of my hobbies, but they’re fun!

   3. I tend to go all in on hobbies because it’s fun! I really enjoy having a passion to think about and read about and improve at. I don’t think it’s too much until it starts interfering with your regular responsibilities.

6. Has anyone tried the wooble crotchet kits? I’m looking for a fun, tangible, craft or “thing” to do for a few women who are joining me for a screen-less long weekend. I read they are TSA-approved. Thinking it could be a nice plane activity for a break from reading.

   1. I have! they are super funny and easy to learn. they are also a bit addictive as the supplies are provided and you’ll get emails about all the new designs as they drop. highly recommend and once you get the hang of it you can decide if you’re ready to branch out/level up or want to continue to buy the Woobles packs (which will be pricier than going it on your own, but for me was a better option until I got very comfortable with the skill).

      1. fun not funny.
         I mean, egg shaped animals that are mostly not egg shaped can also be funny.

   2. i’m fascinated by the idea of a screen-less long weekend — are you guys all just getting together to try to stay off screens, like that’s the purpose of the weekend? or is it a condition of the weekend, no screens? both sound like a good idea tbh

   3. Woobles kits are how I finally successfully taught myself to crochet! The kits marked beginner are, in my opinion, good for true beginners, and the step by step instructions are excellent.

      I will note, though, that the instructions have a video component that I found to be really helpful, so they may or may not fit in well with the “screen-less long weekend” theme.

   4. My teenager loves them. I think they look fun but I don’t want to have a bunch of crocheted tchotchkes cluttering up my house.

   5. There’s a little book you can find at WalMart or any craft store called The Little Encyclopedia of Dishcloths. I recommend it to crochet beginners. It’s inexpensive, dishcloth cotton is likewise cheap, and you end up with something usable even if your first attempts cone out a bit wonky.

7. In the past I’ve gotten emails from vendors or other business associates with a $X “credit” to be used toward a charity of my choice. This was all done via some website where I’d enter in my credit code and then pick from a list of charities. Then I got a receipt for tax purposes. It’s like “donors choose” but not focused exclusively on teachers/education.

   I am looking for it to use for a work project and can’t find it for the life of me!

   1. I searched for “charities similar to donors choose” and several lists popped up. Maybe try that?

      1. I did- none of them are quite what I’m looking for/remembering.

   2. TisBest! it’s like gift cards for charitable donations

   3. Try searching for charitable gift cards….

8. Wanted to share my win for today!

   In my mid 40s over here; I am one of the few women in my finance-bro office and am not exactly a fashion icon. Following a recent closet purge and Labor Day sale shopping trip, I wore a new outfit today and got compliments from several of my firm’s younger, well-dressed men today on how stylish and current I looked.

   1. Congrats! What a great self-esteem boost. What was the outfit?

      1. Thanks! I wore an oversized blazer, linen tee tucked into Brooklyn joggers, and white platform sneakers. Less formal than my usual style, definitely more modern and comfortable. I have a few other new outfits in my closet and am excited to try them out.

   2. Nicely done! Share the outfit?

   3. Nice!

9. Does anyone have a walking pad or treadmill that they really like? We have a rower and a bike but I like the idea of being able to get my steps in during the day during the winter time when walking outside (or even the idea of driving to the gym) is unappealing.

   1. I am in love with the big screen on ProForm and Nordic track with the iFit programming. They have lots of hikes, pretty runs, etc. that you can run/walk along to as it automatically adjusts the incline and speed. I say this as a firm, avoid the treadmill at all costs person.

   2. I have a Nordic Trac with iFit. It was my best pandemic purchase. It does take up a lot of space but I love it.

10. In the era of climate change, is it still a faux pas to wear white after Labor Day?

    1. I have no idea what climate change has to do with anything, but women are wearing bike shorts and baggy T-shirts to nice restaurants where I live. Wear whatever the fuck you want.

       1. I think she just means that it stays warmer later into the fall.

    2. I don’t think so.

    3. Is the opinion of anyone who might think it is a faux pas important to you? Unless there is a context where that matters (trying to impress your partner’s stodgy boss, or make friends with the pearl clutching neighbors), wear what you like.

    4. No! I just had this conversation with a group at a big bridge game yesterday (i.e. an older crowd that might be more predisposed to adhere to such rules). We all agreed that the rule is silly, especially in places where it’s still hot.

    5. I don’t think it’s been a faux pas for years and years. Certainly not in So Cal, where September is the hottest month of the year!

       1. +1 from SF where September is also the warmest month.

    6. Nope, white knit pants, white jeans, and white skorts are all fine after Labor Day, weather permitting (for the skorts). White and cream jackets and cardigans in various permutations also are fine. Plus white blouses, t-shirts, and more. Even white shoes (e.g., sneakers or loafers) are fine. Enjoy!

    7. I take the view that it’s about weather, not the calendar.

    8. Back in the days when there was a fine dress shop and a fine gentleman’s shop on nearly every small town square in the South, I worked in the dress shop in my town. The owner was very, very proper. Old school. Was graduated from Ward Belmont which was essentially a finishing school with some academic rigor to it. She wore white in cold weather but was absolutely insistent that it was a shade called “winter white”. Y’all, it was white.

       So wear what you want and if a Pearl Clutcher tries to call you out on it, imperiously inform them that it is “winter white”.

11. thanks a lot of information keren

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