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Suit of the Week: BOSS

professional young woman wears navy pant suit with asymmetric double-breasted buttons

For busy working women, the suit is often the easiest outfit to throw on in the morning. In general, this feature is not about interview suits for women, which should be as classic and basic as you get — instead, this feature is about the slightly different suit that is fashionable, yet professional. Also: we just updated our big roundup for the best women's suits of 2024!

Every year there are a few amazing BOSS suits in the big Nordstrom Anniversary Sale, and this year is no different. I love this pretty navy pant suit, with the slant pockets and asymmetric buttons. (I'm impressed by how nice it looks worn open, too, if you watch the video.)

The jacket is currently marked to $366, but will go back up to $545 after the sale ends. (It looks like all sizes 0-18 are in stock at the moment, too!) The matching pants are currently $199, but will go back to $298 after the sale. Other matching pieces include this dress, and this alternate jacket.

Other great suits in the sale include an olive suit from Theory (jacket, pants), and a greige suit from Boss (jacket, pants, skirt). If you want a plain black, I'd go for the one from Good American (jacket, pants). Another great find for more conservative looks: the L'Agence Angelina tweed jacket, which we've featured before — there's a pink and orange version in the sale.

Click here for ALL our picks in the 2024 Nordstrom Anniversary Sale!

    Sales of note for 12.5

    160 Comments

    1. You know the best thing about younger generations? You never hear them whistling. What is it about older guys that think everyone around should have to be subjected to that? It’s never women. It’s supposed to be a happy sound. But honestly I think it’s passive aggressive in shared settings.

      2. Where are you hearing all this whistling?
        There is an older gentleman who rides a bike through my local park, whistling real songs at a volume that is impressive, and since it is a talent, it doesn’t really bother me, though, yeah, I don’t get a choice about whether I listen. I don’t think I hear anyone whistling elsewhere on any regular basis.

      3. I kinda love it. Maybe because I’ve never been able to whistle.

        I would 100 times rather hear someone whistle than overhear their cell phone conversation on speaker.

        1. Me too… I love it.
          I’m a musician though, and hear it rarely. If I was working and someone was whistling all the time near me, that would be hard. Or charming. Don’t know!

      4. I agree that whistling isn’t appropriate for the workplace, although I tend to like it otherwise! I enjoy being around older generations at work because they tend to be a lot more polite and have better social skills – yes, a generalization but one that has been pretty true IME.

            1. Generally…. yeah.

              Ghosting
              Scared to call/more personal interactions.
              Less thanking / helping / volunteering.

          2. I feel like the older generations tend to be polite but not kind, and the younger generations tend to be kind but not necessarily polite. Obviously this is very broad and generally speaking.

          3. That’s all I need in the workplace, though. It doesn’t matter to me if Bob doesn’t like me much or express interest in my life, but I appreciate the little social niceties that make the world go around – things like saying hello to a coworker in the elevator instead of burying your face in your phone and pretending you don’t realize who you’re in there with.

      5. Aw, I’m charmed when people whistle or hum to themselves in passing. My grandma used to hum hymns to herself while she tidied. I think it is a remnant of the pre-Walkman days, when you were responsible for making your own music.

        That being said…if I had a deskmate doing this, I also would hate it, haha, so if that’s your situation, I’m with you!

      6. I was surprised to hear my teenage son whistling to himself as he walked into the house a few days ago. Maybe it is making a comeback?

      7. Heh. I never hear anybody whistling any more. But my cleaning lady sings along with the radio and I love to hear that when we’re here at the same time.

    2. Is there any Philly equivalent of Zingerman’s? A friend recently moved to Villanova but works in Philly and I want to get her a local-flavor gift card or gift basket.

        1. Yep. If gift basket or she’ll be working closer to South Philly, I actually prefer Claudio’s for cheese shopping, but DB has a ton of locations now so easy to use a GC.

      2. I second the rec for DiBrunos but since she’s already on the Mainline would also suggest Carlinos in Ardmore.

        If you want very local to Villanova try Campus Corner (pizza), Hopes Cookies, or the Bakery House.

        Caveat to this is I don’t know what Zingermans is so my recs may be off base!

    3. What are your deepest desires? Like if you had no shame or no urge to be practical, what would you visualize as living your best life?

      I think some for me:
      –Living on an island where it’s always warm, sunny, and I swim in the ocean daily. And eat mangos and coconuts.
      –Being active all the time and in the sun.
      –Eating lots of good food – spending more time and money than currently feels reasonable cooking and eating.
      –Lots of love and community engagement. I live in a city that’s very money-focused and want more opportunities to volunteer, give back, and connect with people.

      1. Living in the Southern Hemisphere in the winter months and in the Northern Hemisphere in the summer months. Of course I’d get between the two via private jet. No United for me.

        I’d have both a city house and one in the redwoods for my Northern Hemisphere existence.

        I feel like I already have a lot of the other things I’ve always wanted, and feel blessed to have those!

        1. Ooh I’ll do a home share with you so I can do the opposite… as long as it’s not too extreme. I much prefer the cold to heat!

      2. Oh it would definitely be to live somewhere that’s always warm and sunny with easy access to a beach with a surfable ocean (with no erosion to ruin the break), mountains for trail running and hiking (and maybe we’ll allow one month of snow to ski), and a bay or lake for swimming and paddling. And of course ample time for these hobbies, as well as my other hobbies.

        Of course this place would also be near a city so I could live in a walkable urban environment, have a reasonable COL, and have all of my family and currently dispersed across the country friends nearby too. And I get to keep my current job which I love and is a total unicorn: it is fulfilling / mission focused , has work life balance, I enjoy my coworkers and my job duties, and I make 6 figures.

        I’ll admit my life is probably as close as it reasonably can be to this: I love my job, live in Center City Philly (walkable urban neighborhood), I go hiking and trail running in the Wissahickon 1-2x a week and make it down the shore maybe half of summer weekends, my family is 30 mins away, my Philly friends are great, and most of my non Philly friends are at least in the Northeast.

        Just need to work on that surf break and manage to be closer to the beach …

      3. Never work ever again. Sometimes I deeply regret that I’m not more attractive because I wish I could have just married rich and not worried about working. I know that would come with its own set of problems but..

        1. Love this! But I want to be rich enough to not work and have full-time childcare and household staff. My husband is a SAHD. He had ankle surgery last week, so I’ve been doing most of his chores on top of my own (plus my parents have been helping in the afternoons). His share is no joke–he’s working!

      4. Easy pregnancies with no need for IVF and no more miscarriages beforehand, manageable physical symptoms during, and a night nurse for 4 months postpartum.

        A house overlooking the water that looks like it belongs on the east coast but is in fact located on the west coast.

        Personal chef, housekeeper, and chauffeur.

        A new book by my five favorite authors to become available any time I want one.

        For my husband and I to both reach old age healthily and joyfully, and then to exit it peacefully and non-heart-breakingly.

        Great hiking and the time, willpower, and resources to actually do it.

        1. Great comment, Peloton. I feel the same way about reaching old age with my husband.

          I also want my children to grow up and be happy and self-sufficient. One of them needs a lot of day to day support and I hope we can build in the right management/executive function techniques for her to thrive out there in the world.
          The other is non-binary and I hope they continue to be accepted and loved by others.

      5. -not having to work
        -spending all summer in Maine and a couple months of winter in the Caribbean
        -several big international trips each year, and flying business class everywhere and getting to stay in really nice hotels

        Otherwise I like my life as is, and I sort of have #2 and #3 (we take those trips, just not for as long and not as luxe) so I feel very lucky.

      6. I want to avoid dementia. It’s completely robbed my dear aunt of the retirement and life she deserved. I want to live well to 95 with my husband at my side with no cognitive decline.

        1. Well… I’ll tell you one way.

          My 94 year old dear friend, who I am seeing tomorrow, is an actress. She was on Chicago Fire last year! She has spent her whole life using her brain… to memorize her scripts. Even now her memory is perfect, and better than mine, and I’m half a century younger.

          So use that brain!

          Otherwise, eat decently well, stay active mentally and physically (even just walking is fine!)… no high blood pressure/diabetes/high cholesterol (or take meds to normalize) so that you don’t have strokes. Sleep well. Avoid alcohol. Lower your stress using whatever technique works for you (yoga/mediation/changing jobs). Get hearing aids when you need them. Treat depression. Don’t isolate.

          1. What percent of all dementia cases can be influenced or prevented! Not the OP on this but my aunt had Lewy body dementia and Parkinson’s and I don’t think that she did or didn’t do anything that made this happen. I think she just had bad luck and had been otherwise quite healthy.

            1. I think not much prevents dementia. There are a few things. Getting antiviral medications whenever needed (e.g. for every cold sore flare) seems to lower risk independent of other factors. Getting vaccinations later in life (all our senior boosters) seems to lower risk independent of other factors. Avoiding viral infections might be a good idea too. Otherwise I think it’s just lifestyle/privilege factors (low stress, high engagement, good diet, physically and mentally active enough, community).

          2. Not using your brain is a risk factor, but it’s naive to think you can prevent it just by using your brain. My grandmother suffered from dementia in her 80s and she had a math PhD and was actively doing publishable research right up until the time she got dementia (plus more typical things like reading, socializing, etc.)

            1. Of course… Just an interesting case. The point was the unique focus on memory/memorizing – not intelligence per se. And the continued practice of it for years and years. There is some evidence for this.

              And most dementias are not sudden, so dementia as a catch all term is problematic. Your grandmother’s issue was likely different from someone with progressive Alzheimer’s vs. someone who had progressive step-wise strokes/brain trauma etc…. And there are so many other causes.

      7. Being skinny and healthy while eating anything I want.
        Since you’re all giving dream living locations, I’d love to live in a large NYC apartment with a terrace overlooking Central Park. With summers on my private yacht in the Mediterranean and winter breaks to my Caribbean ocean-front compound.

      8. Living on a little ranchette (with lots of help managing it, lol) with a handful of dressage horses I can feed apples to on my morning walk with my dog(s), a neighborhood where my son is thriving in a great school and with great friends for him. An in ground hot tub. Annual ski trips with no expenses spared. Lots of organic food. Not working, very little stress. Money to throw at problems.
        Lol, I better get back to work to achieve this…

      9. Living in a small, charming house with a garden, overlooking the ocean.

        Volunteering for hospice.

        Lots of peacefulness, yoga, good food, music.

      10. I was born to be a Princess and I’d be way better at it than Meghan Markle.

      11. If Magic is on the table, all of my family and friends from different stages of life, all alive, healthy, happy and nearby (and they all magically get along with each other, of course)

        Unlikely but doesn’t violate the laws of physics is:
        – Fantastic, interesting, challenging job offer that pays great, is in one of my 5-city short lists, great PTO AND they want me to start 6 months from now (whereby I quit my job now, and go on a big trip first)
        – Meet a responsible, interesting guy, who wants kids, supports my career but isn’t motivated only by money and wants to spend the rest of his life with me. We have several healthy happy kids, own a small home in a walkable neighborhood with a creek nearby, and our jobs are flexible enough that we’re able to figure out a way to work remotely part time and take our kids on a year abroad at some point
        – Close to either mountains or ocean, preferably both

        1. +1 – if magic is on the table, all I really want are cures for all cancers (and well, specifically just mine).

        2. If magic is on the table, I would lose 50 pounds and some long term health issues of my own while fixing all the health stuff my friends and family deal with.

          Money would be no object nor world it be a burden.

          I would earn an MBA, work my dream role for a few years, then retire to do volunteer work.

          My crush would reciprocate and no messy pre-existing relationships would interfere.

          Mosquitoes and ticks would no longer bite, and the climate crisis would be fixed.

      12. I would love a staff, to be honest! I’d love someone to cook me magically healthy but tasty meals, someone to be my stylist and personal shopper (but I come along for fun), someone to do all my boring admin, someone to drive me around, someone to clean the house. I could focus all my energy on my hobbies and the “fun” stuff. I never want to lift another finger!

        I’d also love to live in a completely impractical haunted house rickety mansion with over the top maximalist rooms…and a minimal clean lines vacation home in Palm Springs ha ha.

        If I could somehow permanently remove my desire for friends or the nagging worry that I’m not social enough that would be amazing. I seriously considered joining a convent as a teen and my husband considered becoming a monk so we are well suited, but sometimes the “outside world” is just too much and too hard.

      13. To never have to work or labor for a livelihood.
        I’d be an eccentric society woman.
        The country house with a staff to help run. Probably an estate/land manager whose a bit older than me to run the place and to have daliances with over the years. We’d care for each other and be each others confidants but not married or exclusive.
        I’d have at least 3 horses and a pony. A garden and a greenhouse. A large arbour of wisteria or something similar.
        I’d spend my days doing foral arrangements, touring the gardens and rambling the countryside, and crafting, and reading.
        An apartment in the city that has a skylit painting studio that opens to a rooftop balcony.
        I’d winter in the city apartment and attend theater shows in the evenings. Maybe be imvolved in some volunteer or committee work.
        I’d do occassional design work, of various stripes, for commission.
        If magic was possible, I’d be more pretty and charming.
        I’d have friends who’d come and go as they pleased, staying in my home as long as they liked with standing invitations.
        My shoe collection would be extensive.

    4. I posted a couple weeks ago about my crazy neighborhood gossip and you all were wonderfully cathartic to talk to.

      Short story: man makes wife move out very quickly, moves married woman and her two young kids in 3 weeks later, man and new married woman very publicly volunteer all weekend at our small town festival where girlfriend takes many of the same jobs that wife has done previously and they are very much attached at the hip (although I did not see any PDA).

      Okay an update: Man decided “after careful consideration” that he would break his silence and post a long post on Facebook about the situation. Oh I wish I could just copy and paste it, but that seems too weird, so here are the highlights:
      -man and wife were divorced for 5 years previous, he doesn’t know why she kept his name, she must like it better. (they were absolutely living together and telling people they were married in the last five years)
      -yes he has a new roommate/friend with two kids. He’s totally had to redo the rooms and buy beds, but don’t worry the kids are very well taken care of
      -he was going to have to re-home his two dogs that he and wife had, but luckily now he can keep them because new roommate/friend works from home
      -no he and new roommate/friend are not in a relationship. my gosh you guys, you’re horrible…
      -because of the horrible rumors, he thought about resigning from the fire department leadership position he has and heard that “people” were going to try and get him off the village board because of a friendship!
      -BUT once her divorce is final he would be very happy to “officially announce that we are a couple”
      -thanks for sticking with him through all the drama, remember how wife left him and moved in with three other men years ago?

      My jaw literally dropped when I read the “hope to officially announce we are a couple” line. How stupid does he think people are? Whyyyyy would you even say anything about becoming a couple?

      Okay and also not in his post, we have like three bars in town (it’s small here) and he and roommate/friend/married woman were making out in one of them one night when the married woman’s husband was crying outside the bar looking through the window. But guys, they are just friends.

        1. the side piece agreed to clean public restrooms during town festival. Like overfilling toilets and the man looked at her and was like, “after you get done eating you need to go take care of the women’s bathroom”. I COULD NOT BELIEVE that she wasn’t like F U and walk home. So, apparently she has a high tolerance for b.s.

        2. oh also, she was liking/hearting/laughing at the comments. so she apparently was 100% with him.

          he also called out all of the “keyboard warriors out there” which I thought was rich considering where he was literally posting it.

      2. My goodness, what a nutjob! Lying about having been divorced for 5 years and saying his ex wife has moved in with three other men. If I were her I’d be 1) livid about him outright lying and 2) so relieved to not be with someone who’s clearly lost his marbles anymore. Hope she can start to heal and move on from this nightmare.

        1. I also hope they don’t have any kids together and she can hire a lawyer to divorce him asap!

          1. To be honest, I sort of believe that they have been divorced for 5 years and have been lying to everyone else about it for 5 years. Which seems crazy, but if you know the people long enough almost seems believable.

            They didn’t have kids together, she had her 19 year old that he was the stepdad of since the kid was 2/dad was basically out of the picture.

            He had a son that died 2 or 3 years ago (very sad). New girlfriend (oh sorry, friend/roommate) is about the same age as the son would have been.

            Their house is in his parents name. So wife doesn’t get anything from that. He kept her SUV – must have been in his name. She was scrambling to get a vehicle when she was moving out.

            I swear I’m not making this up guys.

      6. VERY good friends, I’d say.

        My neighbor just accused me of stealing her lemons because my tree, which is a few yards from hers, has more lemons on it than hers does. Can’t make this up. Hashtag California Problems.

        1. but…why would you want her lemons if you have many more already?

          sometimes all you can do is laugh

          1. I think the neighbour believes that Anon has more lemons on her tree because she’s stealing them.

      7. Thank you for updating us on the drama. Ugh that guy sounds like the worst, wishing it catches up with him in a humiliatingly public manner.

      8. It’s almost like some crazy reality tv show. I almost want to move to your town to watch it happen.

        1. you should, it’s a nice little town. great coffee shop/bakery/cafe, micro-brewery, yoga studio, special chocolate shop, cute gift store, active little library and community. and a side of great gossip.

          1. Your description makes it sound like it is 100% ready to be made into a tv show. Can’t wait!

        1. it keeps.on.giving. :D

          also, in the last thread someone recommended the podcast Normal Gossip. I’ve been meaning to say – thank you to that person! It’s SO GOOD and my favorite thing this month. Shared with with one of my friends who is also very in love.

          1. I also want to say thanks for the Normal Gossip recommendation! I am loving it!

    5. Secrets thread? Or, if no secrets, current reflections, top of mind thoughts, resentments, conflicts, vents-into-the-void?

      1. Democrats are really good at hating women and making it seem like they don’t. Exhibit A: housing male r@ousts in women’s prisons.

            1. It’s crazy to me that women will write off rape with a response like this. “#believewomen”

          2. Check out the reporting from Reduxx. NSFW to go into details here, but it’s absolutely horrific.

        2. Lifelong Democrat and I’m really hating my party right now. They’re propping up a senile old man, refusing to do any succession planning, arguing about what constitutes a woman rather than passing any meaningful legislation to protect my bodily autonomy, and have heads totally in the sand around inflation and the economy.

          When I saw JD Vance was picked for VP I thought it’s over for millennials and the Democratic party. I will still vote blue in Nov bc I believe in education and healthcare and democracy but I know many one issue and “feelings” voters won’t and the D’s don’t seem to care.

          1. Agreed. It’s been even more enraging to see mainstream Dems rediscover the word “woman” but only in an election year. Biden’s gutting of Title IX deserves the smackdowns it’s getting in the court system.

          3. People who want a dictator will vote for a man who promised to be one. No need to give Vance too much credit. I didn’t realize how unsettling his face is. Is there something wrong with him besides just hating democracy?

          4. I’m a Democrat but have mixed feelings these days. The party just can’t seem to get it together. As much as I despise the republicans, they’re very good at strategizing, and appointing judges to maintain their power.

          5. It’s a choice of voting for the democrats or against the Trump ticket.

            I wish they would switch out Kamala Harris for Wes Moore so if Biden has to step down or our dear lord takes him from us, we wouldn’t have Kamala as President. As much as I want a woman in that role, I want someone there because they are excellent. Margret Thatcher…Boris Yeltsin on BBC shortly after the Berlin wall came down. The newscaster said sometime negative about Margaret Thatcher and he very sternly said ‘Margret Thatcher has balls of steel and she is why we are talking.’ He went on for what felt like 5 minutes and tore the newscaster a new one. I don’t agree with her politics but her leadership was excellent. She held her own and everyone feared her because she was strong in her convictions and I think she genuinely wanted to do what she thought was best for the country/world.

            We need a leader with balls of steel, who is focused on the greater good and not a convicted felon. I would like to see Wes Moore elevated further.

      3. I’m starting semiglutide. I am just barely overweight but I’m the heaviest I’ve ever been and having a hard time losing it. If I spend a day doing anything besides focusing on eating limited calories I backslide. I feel really guilty and crummy but I also really don’t want to keep weighing this much. I’m avoiding social situations and my husband is not attracted to me. If I could do it the “right” way I’d have done it already. Praying it works.

        2. I’m in the same boat and am considering the same. I do everything right, but because of the meds I am on, I just can’t lose. And I hate feeling uncomfortable in my own body.

        3. I’m so sorry. Hang in there. I wish your husband was not a jerk. You deserve better.

          1. He’s not a jerk. He can’t help that I’m 30 pound heavier than he’d like.

            1. That’s really shallow of him. It’s your choice to accept that situation or not, but his opinion as expressed here is definitely quite far over the jerk line.

            2. Bodies change. He shouldn’t have signed up for marriage if he can’t handle that.

            3. I’m sorry so many anonymous commenters decided they had a better handle on whether your husband was a jerk than you did. I have no advice, I’m just sorry that that happened.

            4. Well, sadly many women have come on here looking for confirmation that their husbands are in fact….. jerks…. as they don’t quite see it.

        4. I hope it works for you! I started earlier this year and it’s been nothing short of a miracle. I’m still overweight, the weight loss has been slow but steady, and it feels actually attainable in a way that it hasn’t for the last decade. I’ve traded all of my food- and calorie-focused thoughts for … extra brainspace, half of which is used by marveling that this must be how it feels for normal people.

        5. Please stop feeling guilty. There’s nothing wrong with taking semiglutide and there’s nothing to be ashamed of.

        6. I hope it works for you and that you feel healthy and fantastic in your body. I also think your husband is a bit of a jerk though.

      4. I should not have divorced my husband (or should have waited another 5-10 years). Our pre-nup + his family money meant it was financially devastating. He kept most of “our” friends.He is dating a woman a decade younger than me while I am finding that nobody want to date a divorced 45 year old. Worst of all, my kid is barely speaking to me because as far as she is concerned I am the selfish monster who abandoned my husband for no good reason and he is a saint.

        I made my bed and I am trying to make the best of it but I cannot help but realize I was objectively much better off in my marriage despite the issues.

          1. It all sounds so petty when I type it out. He was very critical and had a tendency to talk to me like he thought I was an idiot. There was a lot of sighing and eye rolling (although always when it was just the two of us). His favorite phrase was “will you just this once be practical.” He was happy to do things as a family but any suggestion that we do something just the two of us was rejected. Our bedroom activities were non-existent and when I raised this with him his basic explanation was that he did not find me particularly attractive. Although he would describe himself as liberal, in practice he wanted a life with very traditional gender roles.

            At best it felt like we were roommates who were co-parenting. At worst, it felt like I was living with someone who did not like or respect me. And in fact, he did not like or respect me; that was quite apparent when I told him I wanted a divorce. I told him I was tired of being treated like the village idiot and his response was “well if the shoe fits.”

            All of that said, he is an excellent father (except for a tendency toward over indulgence). As far as I can tell, he was not cheating on me (it would not be consistent with his view of himself.) My day to day life was much easier. And I had a kid who did not hate me. (She is at a difficult age but it has not been helped at all that without ever openly criticizing me he has made it very, very clear that the divorce was my idea because “your mom just wasn’t happy.”

            I could have just reconciled myself to not being happy in my marriage, avoided him when our daughter was not involved, and been better off than I am now.

            1. Oh darling. I wish I could give you a hug. Being treated like an idiot every day is a horrible way to live. I hope that things improve soon – you’re in the thick of it now and hopefully next year at this time you’ll be so glad you’re not putting up with his ish.

            2. That isn’t petty.

              How recent was your divorce? You might feel differently in a few years, once the effects of the emotional abuse wear off.

            3. This would be a miserable way to spend the rest of your life and I’m not someone usually advocating for divorce. You deserve so much more than this. You’re also setting a great example for your daughter. She doesn’t see it today but one day she’ll realize that you modeled making good choices. And also, if you hadn’t divorced she probably would have hated you for something else for this era, it’s what kids do. Be proud of yourself for taking the hard step now so you can live a better life.

            4. You divorced him for all the right reasons. I am so sorry; you deserve to be treated with respect by everyone in your life, and you deserve to be outright cherished by your life partner.

      6. I’m ready to punch someone. I’ve spent the last 2 weeks doing my least favorite parts of my job, my husband is stressed out about planned home remodel things that he should not be stressed about! ( we’re paying people to do the work, so he doesn’t have to stress out and do it himself, and he’s stressing out and doing it himself), and I’ve also been trying to work out at home instead of paying for a gym and it’s incredible how my husband needs something 7 minutes into my workout every single time.

        and I’m so so tired.

      7. My beloved kitty passed in January (her nickname was “Perfect Angel”) and I really want a kitten but I’m so scared of going through the agony of losing a pet all over again. I know intellectually that to love is to lose and *so* many cats need a home but gosh…it’s tough.

    7. What is your best tip for finding yourself again? I’m turning 50 soon, and I not only don’t feel like myself, I don’t feel like anyone right now…

      1. I’m sorry you’re going through this phase. What a beautiful question to be pondering, though.

        Off the top of my head:
        1) Journaling is a wonderful start. I find it’s the only time I truly feel like I’m talking to myself. I’d set aside an hour at night to start, just journaling out everything on your mind. Then start a daily practice to process and journal on whatever’s on your mind.
        2) Think about various points in your life when you felt most alive or present with yourself. What attributes do you remember cherishing about yourself? What did you love? What brought you joy? Are any of those things missing from your life? How can you bring them back?
        3) What do you want? Not what other people want of you or what you think would be impressive, but what do you truly want? Are you letting yourself connect with the thinks you actually want?
        4) Try to look at what blockers are present for you. Has there been any grief, anxiety, burnout, depression that you’ve been going through? The core of you is always present, but sometimes it requires healing from the other stuff that may be clouding everything out.
        5) There should be a lot of great books and workbooks on this topic. Try perusing booksellers or your library and check out any you feel interested in.

        50 is a wonderful age to have a personal renaissance and to start connecting with yourself again. Sending you lots of love in this journey.

      2. Think of a time in your life when you felt most at peace. What were you doing then? How can you make your life resemble that time again? For example, I feel my best when I’m sticking to my routines of cooking, working, workout classes, running and enjoying my free time with friends and my SO. Can you throw yourself back into any hobbies or activities you enjoy? It also might be helpful to think about what has happened recently to make you not feel like yourself. Are you newly single, an empty nester or did you have a job change? Sometimes major changes throw me off and I lose sense of my identity. Therapy might also be a good option for you. Best of luck and I hope you start feeling more in tune with yourself soon!

      3. Have you read Designing Your Life? It may or may not be a good fit for you, but it’s not a bad place to start.

          1. No, but the middle years of women’s health and hormonal changes are filled with discomfort for many. And simply being able to re-stabilize your sleep and mood is pretty damn important, and HRT has been neglected for so many years as one solution. Also, to protect your heart, bones, reduce colon cancer risk and more is another no brainer. My older women cousins are now kicking themselves that their doctors were not more proactive. But you have to take it early, because you may have to taper off it when you are older.

          2. I don’t get why HRT would be any better than hormonal BC, which I found absolutely terrible.

            1. The reason I want HRT is because hormonal BC sucks; I think they’re kind of the opposite? BC can cause low estrogen levels and almost non-existent progesterone (progestin is not the same!). HRT these days can provide estrogen and (real) progesterone.

            2. I’m almost 50 too and never stopped hormonal BC and it’s been a wonder drug, I have no menopause symptoms at all so ymmv.

            3. HRT is not hormonal BC. For one, HRT is modulated across the cycle, BC is not. For two, HRT is much lower levels of hormones than BC – which is designed to mimic pregnancy levels.

          3. Women’s health is severely under-studied but contemporary research finds that Estrogen plays a systemic role across multiple organs and systems in women’s bodies, including neurological function. It is not everything but it is a central factor for women of menopausal and peri-menopausal age, affecting everything from self-concept to kidney function.

      5. I turn 50 next month and just don’t like the number, it’s like officially I’m no longer any category of young. But what helped me a lot was making a list comparing my life at 40 to my life at 50. With the exception of a couple of pounds and a couple of wrinkles, my life is objectively better in every single category. And that makes the little stuff just seem so incredibly insignificant.

    8. Can anyone explain what is going on with this models right hip in this Banana Republic photo? It has been driving me bonkers ever since I saw it.
      https://bananarepublicfactory.gapfactory.com/browse/product.do?pid=451544001&bc_pid=NDUxNTQ0MDAx&tid=bfem000001&EV=BRFSUS_PB_2B&DI=199587181&mi_u=199587181&sv_svems=c5454a759612485243b3aa734257e169a2982cd746bde34c58d8797a4da0e046&obem=IWxbHegXYBhudSXmgk4Lovl9z1OXbHASik62HOOGLoM=&bc_lcid=t6590615385137152lw4528388087865344#pdp-page-content

      1. oh wow this is amazing…if you cover either side of her, it looks fairly normal (left side only = she’s jutting out her hip, right side only = she’s standing straight), but the full image looks bonkers.

      2. I think her left hip is probably also pretty far over but the drape of the jumpsuit makes it look like it’s not?

      5. Honestly, same dress/model looks weird to me in the rear view photo, same hip. It’s less extreme by quite a bit, but still off.

    9. Hiring officials – are you still reading cover letters? Or are they some old-fashioned relic?

      1. 100%, wouldn’t consider an application without one. How am I supposed to know if a person has any basic-level abilities or common sense without one?

        1. We need them because 90% of candidates have weird jobs on their resumes that have nothing to do with our work. The cover letter needs to explain why career pivots are happening or how the skills are transferable.

        2. I feel the exact same way. I won’t consider an applicant who doesn’t write one and not doing one is a major missed marketing opportunity. Resumes are dry and dull, even the best ones and a cover letter tells a story if you do it well. It’s a chance to sell me on you so that I want to meet you and interview you. Why miss that opportunity?

      2. I review hundreds of resumes a year and don’t care. I spend a minute or two on a first resume read, there’s no way I’d truly review a cover latter as well.

        1. +1

          When I have an open position I have to reveiw too many resumes to focus on the cover letter, which usually is some boring boilerplate BS anyway.

          1. I commented above, if you’re going to do boilerplate BS, don’t bother but if you take the time to do a thoughtful one it can make all the difference.

      3. I used to really like to read cover letters for certain positions I hire for require putting together documents and writing skills. You wouldn’t think a cover letter is a good test for this, but it truly is since many, many do not have this skill. For the technical positions I hire for that don’t require working in document creation a lot, I didn’t care about the cover letters.

        However, I have taken the internet consensus that apparently they are a waste of time, and I no longer rule people out if there isn’t a cover letter. I also try not to ask for them any more, even though I personally thought it was valuable and less annoying than asking for a writing sample.

        That said, if you send me a resume with cover letter (or concise cover letter like email with resume attached) I will definitely notice and if it’s drafted well I will +1 that.

      5. Personally, if the candidate has no connection I think a cover letter is helpful. If the candidate is a known quantity already, a cover letter is not terribly useful and it feels demeaning to make them write one.

        Related: our HR system will not process an application without a cover letter, but if the candidate uploads their resume in both the resume and the cover letter spots it gets through just fine.

      7. I read them because I need to know, among other things, if you are really looking to work in my geographic area or are just firing off resumes.

      8. We require them. We hire a lot of new college grads and so it helps get a feel for them and just prove they can write or at least the sense to have someone help them. We do see some horrible ones.

        We don’t give them more than a cursory glance until the phone interview though.

        We receive a lot of apps and probably 50% don’t upload it. They attach their resume to that required document field. If they can’t be bothered to have ChatGPT spin one up we pass out the gate.

        1. Yeah, you don’t have to really get into cover letters until you’ve narrowed down your field, so the “I get too many applications” problem isn’t really a problem. But I know it’s also totally dependent on the role whether you need to screen for things a cover letter will tell you.

    10. Not a question, more like a Today I Learned – Yesterday’s thread about bosses and email proofing made me realize I have a micromanager for a boss. Relatively new boss to me. He showed me how he ranks the CC people, and stated that putting someone last was a deliberate slight. At the time I honestly thought it was a joke and laughed. I have never once broached this subject with another person in my 20 year working life. And now I learn people care about this for real and my mind is BLOWN! Have I been slighting him for the past six months by putting him last on some emails? Does he actually take the time to look? We get hundreds of emails per day!
      He also spends countless hours revising powerpoints that are substantially complete and accurate for aesthetics. He is never ever happy with what I produce and I was totally OK giving up the reigns of aligning boxes and background fill to him but I did think it was kind of crazy.
      He also frequently issues counter direction when I had just issued direction to my team (after discussing with him). I just realized I’ve stopped producing email direction to my whole team and now only issue individual direction to each member which I leave him off of. I guess sort of unconsciously, I started documenting the content of our verbal conversations in meeting chat in case he forgets again.
      I have been treating all of the above as little quirks that we’ll iron out as we get used to each other but your responses make me concerned!

      1. Oh god, this is my favorite thing about big law—the drama some people can bring about the recipients not being in the order they would’ve been in on the cover of a formal memo.

      3. Oh I definitely know people who care about cc order. I always do alpha and org seniority as a result.

        1. I know people who care about this too, and sometimes I purposely do it a way they would like to mess with their heads. Perks of my own seniority!

      1. Honestly glass of milk or handful of nuts or slice of cheese right off the brick are my go-tos : anything more complicated I am not going to actually prepare

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