This post may contain affiliate links and Corporette® may earn commissions for purchases made through links in this post. As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases.
Bow details on pumps: yea or nay? I generally don't like them — I'm just not a bow girl, I guess? — but these little bows on these pumps seem entirely acceptable to me. (I do love a strappy pump, after all.) They're getting good reviews and are available in navy, light gray, and light blue* (* online only), available in sizes 5-11 for $138… but today you can take 40% off most things at Ann Taylor (see our mini sale roundup below!), so they come down to $82.80. Nice! If you like the teensy bow, they have mules and flats featuring the detail, as well as these strappy metallic pumps which are final sale at $25 but might be great if you've got a lot of weddings to attend soon. Pictured: Mila Suede Bow Pumps This post contains affiliate links and Corporette® may earn commissions for purchases made through links in this post. For more details see here. Thank you so much for your support!What to Buy at the Ann Taylor 40% Off Sale:
Sales of note for 11.5.24
- Nordstrom – Fall sale, up to 50% off!
- Ann Taylor – 11/5 only – 60% off sale
- Banana Republic Factory – 50% off everything + extra 25% off with your GAP Inc. credit card
- Bloomingdales is offering gift cards ($20-$1200) when you spend between $100-$4000+. The promotion ends 11/10, and the gift cards expire 12/24.
- Boden – 10% off new styles with code; free shipping over $75
- Eloquii – Fall clearance event, up to 85% off
- J.Crew – 40% off fall favorites; prices as marked
- J.Crew Factory – Up to 60% off everything + 60% off clearance
- Lo & Sons – Fall Sale, up to 35% off
- M.M.LaFleur – Save 25% sitewide
- Neiman Marcus – Up to 30% off on new arrivals
- Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
- Talbots – Buy one, get one – 50% off everything!
- White House Black Market – Holiday style event, take 25% off your entire purchase
And some of our latest threadjacks here at Corporette (reader questions and commentary) — see more here!
Some of our latest threadjacks include:
- What to say to friends and family who threaten to not vote?
- What boots do you expect to wear this fall and winter?
- What beauty treatments do you do on a regular basis to look polished?
- Can I skip the annual family event my workplace holds, even if I'm a manager?
- What small steps can I take today to get myself a little more “together” and not feel so frazzled all of the time?
- The oldest daughter is America's social safety net — change my mind…
- What have you lost your taste for as you've aged?
- Tell me about your favorite adventure travels…
CountC
I love these.
Anonymous
Yes. I could walk to pick up lunch and back and ruin them in that little time (or any other skinny heels). I can’t have nice things.
Anon
That’s why I change shoes when I go outside. Even for lunch. I get that not everybody wants to do that, but that’s my method for keeping my nice things nice.
Anonymous
What do you change into? I am looking for something a bit more “office” than Rothys so that the change doesn’t stand out. If I’m wearing a suit + slippers, I will run into someone.
Anon
I live in a really rainy place, so I usually end up wearing rain boots. Where I live, everybody wears rain boots outside and it doesn’t look out of place, even with otherwise more formal office wear. Otherwise, slip on sneakers or Birkenstocks. I’m in a business casual workplace and I realize these options might not fly in business formal environments. But mostly I just don’t care what people think when I’m walking to lunch or whatever. I think most people probably don’t even notice.
Aggie
My change shoes are M.Gemi Fortuna flats. They are similar to the Rothy points, but all leather and look intentional. (Honestly, some days I never change back to my heels.) They are slightly more expensive than Rothys, but I have a referral code for $50 off:
https://share.mgemi.com/x/7c1Vr2
Anon
Me too.
Did Ann Taylor start getting cute clothes in again?
Anon
I can’t wear heels due to foot issues and I work in a super casual workplace and have no need for them anyway, but these are absolutely gorgeous.
Pretty Primadonna
I do, too! I’m practically drooling over them. So pretty.
LaurenB
So much better than the “curvy vampy vixeny” pumps of a few days ago! These are great.
Anonymous
Oh man I am so sad they don’t have the light blue color in my size! Thoughts on whether the light gray is appropriate for spring and summer?
I don’t usually like bows on shoes but this one is inoffensive. It adds a little interest without being too froo.
Abby
I have light grey pumps and they go with everything for all seasons, but especially summer
Beth
+1. We spent a lovely few days in Bordeaux/Sauterne (including at the Caudalie spa which I highly recommend) in November. The vineyard visits are wonderful (lots of history/biology/tradition to go along with the wine tasting) and the Cit du Vin wine museum was awesome.
Anon
Did you wear grey pumps there?
Beth
Are the light gray pumps a cool (blue) gray or a warm (taupe) gray?
Abby
I had to look up cool vs warm grey lol, I’d say cool.
Anon
Light grey definitely works for spring and summer.
Anon
Ok, so I just got these in the light grey and they are objectively gorgeous, but they show a LOT of foot. Like, I am not weird at all about “toe cleavage” (I don’t think it’s a real thing), but they exposed so much of my foot (including basically my entire baby toe) that they did not look good on me. Which made me sad. Hopefully if you order they’ll work for you, but I wanted to put that out there.
tz
Was wondering the same thing and avoided add to cart. Thanks!
Anon
Cannot wait for my follow up dr appointment tomorrow after starting Lexapro 8 weeks ago. I was diagnosed with anxiety and depression and while I think it has helped my anxiety, my depression almost feels worse. I have worked from home the past 3 days and gotten almost nothing done. I feel so heavy in the morning I can barely get out of bed and sleep far later than I should. Then I feel lazy and disgusting and incredibly guilty and it’s like a guilt/depression cycle that never stops. I want to crawl in a hole. Sorry for the vent. I’m too embarrassed to tell anyone this IRL.
Anon
I’ve been on lexapro for years and recently added wellbutrin and it makes a lot of difference
anonymous
+1
I’ve never taken lexapro but I’ve taken zoloft, another ssri,and had that exact feeling. Wellbutrin is great for motivation. Hang in there, OP. It’s tough but you can get through it!
pugsnbourbon
+1. Ask if there are other drugs you can take in combination, or switch to. And I’m sorry you’re going through this – I know if feels like it’ll always be this way but it won’t. You will get better and you’re doing the things you need to do to get there.
Anon
Ask your dr for a therapist recommendation as well, the combination will help. Also, hugs. This is hard but you will get better with time and effort, which you are putting in if you are checking in with your doctor.
scsmith
Anon <3
My heart goes out to you. I was on Lexapro for about two years when I was in college; it took me over a year to tell anyone that I was taking it. I definitely felt the same lessened anxiety and deepened depression. In my experience, the depression side of things did not seem to get better without regular social activity. Be kind to yourself, but try your best to speak/see people you trust regularly. I hope your follow up appointment is helpful!
Anon
I’m super surprised your doctor gave you a new drug (and your first for mental health?) and just had you go away for two months without a check-up in between – not cool in my book. Please tell me she at least called to check up on you?
As someone who has rotated through a not insignificant number of anti-depressants, the the line about “oh, just tough it out, it’ll get better, the side effects will go away, it’ll be worth it” make me pretty hot under the collar. It means countless numbers of people suffer with violent side effects or their depression and anxiety so much longer than they have to because it supposedly takes months for a drug to start working. IME, how I do the first week is how I’ll do no matter how long I stay on the drug…but unfortunately, you only learn that after being subjected to drug after drug.
Anonymous
Yes. I thought the “give it two months” thing was for whether it starts working… not for whether it stops making things worse. (For SSRIs anyway. Wellbutrin really did take a good six weeks to settle in for me.)
Shoe comfort?
Can anyone speak to the comfort level of Ann Taylor shoes?
anne-on
Generally very comfortable IMHO, especially for the price. If they made more flat/low heeled shoes I’d be all over them.
Abby
I have 2 pairs, I think they’re great. I leave them at work, and don’t walk too much
Anon
I had some years ago (like 2006? or earlier?) and they were super comfortable and versatile for years! In fact, I could probably still wear them if I wanted. But I WFH so much that I just don’t need the variety anymore (they are dark brown pumps with a bit of monochrome embellishment, similar to these).
Housecounsel
It’s been a while, but I recall Ann Taylor pumps being pretty but painful, with very little padding. These are pretty so I may try again and not walk much.
JB
Have a 2.5 inch heel from them last year and think they are very comfortable
Evodia
Looking for the hive’s advice. My DH and I have the chance to travel to Bordeaux for a 2-day work event. We are thinking of taking the opportunity to turn this into a vacation. If you could spend a week away, where else would you go besides Bordeaux? We’ve thought about Paris, but have been before and we live in NYC so are thinking of something less urban. We are serious foodies, so that’s a priority, too. Thanks for any thoughts!
Anonymous
Aix en Provence
Anonymous
I just got back from a lovely time in Strasbourg and the Alsace-Lorraine region and would highly recommend for food, wine, history, and antiques. I have also been wanting to spend a week in the Dordogne region, which is next on my France travel list.
anon
Lyon is known for having some of the best restaurants in France. If you wanted to go somewhere closer, Biarritz and San Sebastian are absolutely beautiful, and the food in the Basque region would be unique.
Anon
Lyon is considered the food capital of France. It’s not super close to Bordeaux though and I’m not sure you can get a direct train (might have to go through Paris, which is even more out of the way).Nantes is also supposed to be good, and is closer.
Equestrian attorney
Honestly I would putter around Bordeaux, then rent a car and go to lots of vineyards, or stay in the Caudalie spa. I like Lyon but it’s on the other side of France so it doesn’t seem that practical (I get that France is small by US standards but still)
Ideas relatively near Bordeaux (ie western coast of France) include Toulouse and Carcassone, La Rochelle, Ile de Ré, or Basque Country (Biarritz or Saint Jean de Luz). Lots of lovely food all around, so it really depends on what you like – nature, cities, history, beaches? When would this be?
Beth
+1. We spent a lovely few days in Bordeaux/Sauterne (including at the Caudalie spa which I highly recommend) in November. The vineyard visits are wonderful (lots of history/biology/tradition to go along with the wine tasting) and the Cit du Vin wine museum was awesome.
anon
We had a wonderful vacation in southwestern France last Spring and I am still reminiscing . I used to live in Paris and southwestern France is my favorite region; the food is amazing. If you like wonderful wine, while in Bordeaux region, definitely take a day trip over to St. Emillion and another day trip driving the D2 in the Medoc. Note if you want to do a wine tasting, you must call ahead and make reservations, no showing up like in the US. I would recommend the Dordogne river valley. And my favorite is the basque region which straddles France and Spain on the Atlantic. It is a relatively quick and easy to get from Bordeaux down to San Sebastian in Spain, with stops along the way in Bayonne, Biarritz, St Jean de Luz. And you can also go north to LaRochelle too.
Cat
FWIW, we are also city dwellers — and had a far better time on our 2nd and 3rd visits to Paris than we did on our first. With no pressure to see all the big-ticket tourist things, we felt FREE to wander without a schedule, prioritize long meals as s!tes in and of themselves, etc. Yes, we did visit a few touristy things each time, but it was more like 1 per day than 2-3. It was amazingly relaxing.
The original Scarlett
I don’t know how close it is (and I feel like I should) but we spent a lovely few days in the Loire Valley at the B&B Domaine des Hautes de Loire – I’d go back in a heartbeat. From there, we drove around to a bunch of the chateaux’s. Highly recommend the hotel – it was an absolute dream. Ann Street Studio did a nice profile on it & the onsite food was amazing. We are also city dwellers and enjoyed the change of pace going out to the countryside.
Anonymous
Have been wanting to explore Bordeaux for years! If the right season, there is an oyster festival nearby in Arcachon on the coast. The coast was lovely. Was at a work event and could not explore Bordeaux
anon
Any runners? I used to run regularly – as in, a couple years ago. I do a relay with a non-competitive group every year, and this year I am assigned to a hilly, 6 mile route (the rest of my assigned components are easy, low mileage and flat). Last year I coasted through with probably residual training/muscle memory/general fitness, but I’m looking at 6 weeks to this run and am worried about the hills AND the mileage. I live in a part of the country that is still very cold and is pretty flat, but do have a gym membership. Any training plan suggestions?
Running Anon
Hal Higdon makes some beginner plans you could follow. I am not a coach (I do train for races under a coach, though), but I think the key is to try to go out and run 3x per week, anywhere from 2-5 miles. Consistency is what will develop your fitness. Do not be afraid to go really slow or take walk breaks. You can use the incline function on the treadmill to mimic hills if you don’t want to run outside.
Anon
Use a treadmill for the hill portion; just put it on a 6% incline or whatever it is and run for a few miles.
Hal Higdon has 10k training plans (6.2 miles), which is basically what you are doing. Start at week 2 or 3, and you’ll be on track for your race.
Have fun! I did a Ragnar in the fall and loved it.
Running Anon
I have a comment in mod that literally says the exact same thing!
Anon
I have a comment in mod that literally says the exact same thing!
Anon
Cold is not a reason to not run. Get the right clothes and get out there! You’re really limiting your training if you let that be an excuse.
AnonZ
The best advice I ever got on hill running was to focus on keeping your effort the same throughout inclines and declines and not worrying about pace. Yes, you will go a bit slower on the uphills but you will avoid pushing too hard and wearing yourself out, and you can make up time on the downhills.
If you’re not already incorporating strength training, adding some squats and deadlifts will also help build muscle strength that can be very helpful in running on inclines.
cbackson
Ragnar?
If you haven’t been running much I would focus on getting comfortable with the mileage and not worry about hill-specific training.
kneehighs
I did a running class for a little while and the tips on form really helped me increase mileage. When running up hills try to lift your legs up a bit more in a knee-highs style. I found this to be really helpful when doing the crazy inclines on the treadmill.
Goodluck!
Toronto Recs
Paging Toronto ‘rettes! I asked for advice a few weeks ago on things to do in Toronto for our 1st anniversary long weekend trip there in May. Many suggested West Queen West to stay, and the airbnb I wanted literally was booked while I went to grab my credit card last night. There are 2 others I’m interested in, one in Distillery District, one in Fashion District. Thoughts between the two? Should I just pay a little extra and stay in West Queen West? Our idea was to stay in a comfortable airbnb, but nothing fancy because we hope to be out and about all day, so looking for a convenient location. We’ll have a car, but hope to drink cocktails all day, so will any tips for public transportation as well? Thanks!
Anonymous
Toronto ‘rette here. The Distillery District is beautiful but really out of the way – there’s some stuff to do in the district itself, but not a lot in the surrounding area, so you’re going to have a trip across town to get to said cocktails. I personally can’t stand the Fashion District (it’s very clubby – so if that’s your style, then that’s the spot for you) and would say to stick with West Queen West or even just Queen West. Both the Fashion District and Queen West are convenient for everything central, but most of the cutest drink and dinner spots and shops are a bit further west. It’s definitely worth it to pay a little extra, especially in May, as that’s when the ‘park season’ here really starts and you will definitely want to check out Trinity Bellwoods Park (which is West Queen West)!
Never too many shoes...
+1 to all of the above.
Shopaholic
+100
Personally, I wouldn’t stay close to the subway line but I hate most of those neighborhoods and much prefer the ones that are either fairly east or west.
But take it with a grain of salt because I am clearly biased – I live in WQW and love it so much.
Anonymous
Oh and for public transportation – the Queen St. or King St. streetcar will take you literally from one end of the city to the other for like $3.50. I prefer to walk (Toronto is a very walkable city – the streets are almost a perfect grid) or ride my bike (there are city bikes you can rent at pretty much every major intersection), but the streetcar is definitely great if you are going to be out and about and don’t have time to walk from place to place or are not wearing a bike-friendly outfit!
Toronto Recs
Thank you!! Definitely do not want to go clubbing with my husband! I thought all the things we’d want to do would be east of West Queen West based on Distillery District, St Lawrence Market, etc being that way, but we’ll stick with WQW airbnb. And the transportation tips are exactly what I needed. I’ll be back closer to our trip for more specific recs.
Anonymous
I live in St. Lawrence Market neighbourhood and it is lovely and quiet to live there, but I always go to WQW any time I am actually going out and about. Depending on how long you have and your plans, maybe take a halfday and do St. Lawrence Market and Leslieville (which is far east but is very cute and accessible by Streetcar).
ND
I would actually opt to stay closer to the subway line (on Queen, King or Dundas) rather than in a cool neighborhood so it’s easier to move around. I’d vote Fashion over Distillery for accessibility if the Airbnb reviews are good (the club thing doesn’t bother me and I’m not into clubbing – as long as the place itself isn’t noisy).
SuperAnon
I can’t tell anyone irl about this, but ugh. I am very happily married. I recently sat next to a man on a flight. We work in a similar field, and I enjoyed talking to him about that and some other common interests we have. All of that is totally normal and fine.
What is not totally normal and fine is I cannot stop thinking about him. He’s objectively very attractive and successful. I resisted contacting him for days until I accepted his invitation on LinkedIn. I have his number, and I really really want to text him (I didn’t give him mine). He was obviously flirting with me, even though he knew I was married. I would typically be creeped out by this behavior, but I wasn’t and totally played into it. What on earth is happening? Anyone else experienced this? I feel like a horrible person.
Anonymous
What is happening is that you met an attractive man and felt some excitement. That’s normal.
Now stop. Throw away his number and move on.
You are not a horrible person. You’re normal. But now …stop.
Anon
It’s totally normal to find other men attractive and get crushes, even if you’re happily married, so don’t beat yourself up about how you feel. That said, if you want to remain married, you shouldn’t text someone you have a crush on that is obviously into you. I’m a firm believer that an affair isn’t one bad decision, but a series of bad decisions, and texting him would be the first in that series of bad decisions.
Lana Del Raygun
Texting him would be the second. The first was adding him on LinkedIn. Delete him and lose his number.
Anon
Agree. Delete him from LinkedIn and lose the number. Take it as a compliment that you still got it. And then forget him. Keeping the number and the LinkedIn connection is going to make it hard for you to forget him.
Also, he’s super exciting right now because you had an interesting interaction and now your brain is filling out the rest of the fantasy. I promise he’s just a regular guy in real life.
Anon
This!
Delete Linkedin, phone number and move on…It’s just not worth it.
Anonymous
You’re not a horrible person but you are human. I would recommend you not contact him further. Unfollow him on any social media.
anon
I had a similar thing happen to me when I was engaged, met someone and thought they were so cool and interesting. I think it’s nice to know you still got it, when an attractive stranger is so into you. Take the compliment, go on a great date with your husband and throw away this guy’s number.
Anon
+1
Anonymous
Yep. Don’t beat yourself up about this. It happens! But don’t do something you’ll regret and reach out to him or communicate with him further. Delete his info, take your husband to dinner, then go home and light some candles and put on some sexy music. Make good use of the zingy energy.
Anon
This.
Anon
Not looking for advice, just wanted to share that my husband and I have been looking to relocate to our favorite state for a while, and I’ve had two great phone interviews with a company not only in favorite state, but also in a dream city, for basically a unicorn job (for me), and found out yesterday that they’re flying me in week after next for an in-person interview and that it’s down to me and one other candidate. And I’m just so ready to get out there and do my best to hit this out of the park, and I’m not sure how I’ll settle down for the next 10 days.
Chris
That is very exciting!
Anon
Abra from Cap Hill Style is engaged (per her Instagram stories). Apparently they’ve been engaged for a month and she “had to” announce it now because she got some mean comments on the internet (I wonder if she’s referring to the ones here!?). Using your engagement as a slapback to anonymous internet haters is…a choice.
Anon
*clapback, sorry autocorrect. But I kind of like slapback too.
Eh
She’s referring to the mean comment on her own blog. Did you write that one, too? Or are you just obsessed with dragging her here? Hard to call it a “clapback” if you have not even read the actual comments where she revealed it. Obsessing with a blogger you’ve never met and posting hateful things unprompted about her is… a choice. Get better hobbies.
Anon
No I didn’t write that one (I don’t comment on her blog and don’t read it much unless it’s discussed here) and I hadn’t seen it until now. It is a pretty mean comment, but I still think it’s very strange to announce your engagement that way. It comes across very “neener, neener, I AM engaged,” as someone said below.
Anon
Why is she living rent-free in your head, and why do you care?
cbackson
This is an excellent way of putting it.
I find Belle a bit tiresome, so I skip the posts that aren’t about clothes (or the gift guides). I think it’s worth considering what about her tends to trigger this reaction in people (because that probably tells us more about ourselves than it does about her).
Anon
Oh wow. I was on team stop with the personal attacks but that’s ridiculous.
Anon
A quick search of her Instagram does not show what you’re saying is there. Neither does her twitter.
If Abra is engaged, congratulations and best wishes to her. More happy people in the world is a good thing.
If that’s not your jam, then try taking a lesson that Thumper learned from his mom.
Anon
Stories
Anon
Oooh yikes, that is a super weird and defensive way of announcing it. I don’t know what the original comment was and I take everybody’s word for it that it was mean and uncalled for, but why even stoop to that level to acknowledge it? What a way to suck the joy out of what is otherwise a really happy thing.
Cat
Yeah I am confused by this too. Seems bizarre and reactionary. Girl has been blogging for what, a decade? And a mean comment led her to announce her engagement by way of telling the person off?
I hope they are happy together and that Belle doesn’t regret her choice to commingle her big announcement with this venting.
Anon
The comment in question:
“Hey Belle! Here’s an idea. Instead of having your boyfriend write posts mansplaining work to your female readers, why don’t YOU get a decent job with some growth potential and write about that? That would be about 10,000 times more illustrative and interesting than this.
I think it’s past time to understand that the blogging “career” isn’t working out the way you expected it to and it’s time to get a real, grown-up job, like the kind your readers have. There’s a lot of chatter on other blogs about how you seem to be waiting around for Kyle to propose so you can get your MRS and really not have to focus on your career any more. I would posit that if that is not the case, maybe it is “put up or shut up” time. Work advice blogs are really only useful to me if they’re written by someone who is actually working. You’re wasting a lot of good years spinning your wheels waiting to get famous, or whatever. Maybe it’s time to move forward.”
My now-husband and I waited about a month to announce our engagement. We wanted time to tell family and close friends, and enjoy the early stages of being engaged without planning. (Now, I’m the commenter whose family promptly verbally abused her, so that all blew up….) Perhaps people would have done better to not speculate publicly on her personal life, for everyone’s sake.
anon
I probably wouldn’t have done it, but I don’t find it that strange. She’s a human being with feelings and someone said something really hurtful. She was probably hurt and reacting to that. Yeah, no one made her do it. Maybe she feels better being able to say that in her defense. I’d probably feel the same way. What’s the big deal?
Anonymous
So against my better judgement I am getting sucked into this (I’m having a sllooowww week at work) even though I am not a regular reader of Cap Hill Style…and that announcement was like, whoa! The timing seems questionable, as does the tone…like, I am so engaged! Neener neener!
Anon
Agreed. Not a regular reader either and the way she gets defensive to each commenter is surprising. Seems time consuming on her part. I like Kat’s style of blogging much better.
Anon
This style of blogging doesn’t even seem like real “blogging” to me? It’s really short posts that are just about clothes. They rarely include personal information. Which is totally fine! I just think it’s an apples to oranges comparison.
Anon
I just don’t understand how she writes all of these posts knowing she’s going to get anonymous comments from strangers and then freaks out in the comments on each one that disagrees with her. I’m not talking about the mean comment because, yes, that was rude. But she basically posts something and then gets incredibly defensive if someone criticizes her or her boyfriend’s writing.
Anonymous
I mean she writes the posts because it’s her primary source of income.
January
No, she stated it in a reply to a negative comment on her own blog.
Anon
Oh wow, I went and read that comment and the commenter was quite mean. I think you’re being pretty mean, too.
Anonymous
Why are people here so defensive of Abra? Legit asking. If you are personal friends with her, I totally get it.
January
I don’t know that I’m so defensive of her as much as I thought it was weird for the OP here to wonder whether the comments here (vs. on her own blog) prompted Abra to go public with her engagement. It’s weird to give yourself that much credit.
Anon
Agree completely. That comment was beyond hateful… the OP here is pretty hateful, too.
Anonymous
Can you break down for me what, in the OP’s post here (not the original comment – agree that was over the line) is “hateful”? I legitimately do not see it. We’re just talking about a public announcement by a public person who has a publicly available blog. It’s not like someone posted naked pictures of the blogger in question without her permission? The reaction here seems WAY oversensitive and so not in-line with the tone of the regular commenters here that I have to wonder if we are seeing some hardcore Abra supporters showing up…
Anon
If it makes you feel better to believe that people who do not know or do not care about Abra are “defending” her, you do you, but that’s not reality.
Some people have said rather nasty things about the woman – the comment on her own page, the one yesterday that accused her of adultery – and then some other chick went onto her Instagram stories, saw something she didn’t like, and decided to write about it here. It’s really weird that you’re all obsessed with this random woman in Montana.
Anon
Abra is a prominent blogger with tens of thousands of followers on social media. She’s hardly a “random woman in Montana” and taking two seconds to make a snarky remark about something a public figure has done is hardly being obsessed.
Anon
This post wasn’t mean? I don’t even know who any of these people are, but writing about somebody’s blog isn’t inherently mean . . .
Anon
The Op is disparaging her in her comment about it being “… a choice”. Making fun of someone’s reactions in a negative way, in response to someone else being mean, is rather, well, mean. Do we really need to do that?
Anon
It’s near the end of the comment section on the work/job post of her blog that people were referring to on this mornings thread
Anonymous
Why is this internet person’s personal life such a fascination? I get she has a blog that a lot of people read, but why does that make her personal life so important to you? If she bothers you, can’t you just ignore it? I don’t follow blogs or instagrams run by people who I don’t like, which I thought was a pretty easy, obvious choice to make. I don’t understand going out of your way to complain about content that is completely optional to consume.
Anon
This.
Anon
Yes. I find it especially funny because all this pot stirring about Belle is probably driving up her website traffic! If you truly don’t like her stop giving her free publicity?
Anon
I think it’s hilarious that this group is getting so defensive when, in general, this is one of the more judgmental comment boards I’ve seen on the internet.
Anonymous
People here are SO judgmental but any time someone wants to discuss a celeb or public figure it’s mean and judgy. It’s only ok when it’s your anonymous coworkers, friends and family that you’re making fun of, I guess.
Anon
Yep.
Anon
Meh I agree people here can be super judgmental but it feels different talking about an unifentifiable friend/coworker/family member rather than a real identifiable person. I realize that people who willingly put their personal lives out in the public are inviting commentary on their personal lives. But I do think there’s a distinction between saying on here that you’re random coworker who no one would be able to identify is a horrible person for always hitting on your married coworker and accusing an Identifiable person of adultery
Anon
I think you’re making a BIG assumption that it’s unidentifiable. I have recognized two regular posters (ie., those that mostly use a specific screen name) from their comments here – in one case, I knew the person in real life (through work) and in another case because I followed the author’s personal bl0g. I learned much, much more about their lives from their comments here than I knew from our professional conversations or the bl0g, respectively. Also even if you’re commenting as “Anon” or “Anonymous” sometimes the posts (about, say, wedding or family drama) are incredibly detailed and would be recognizable to people close to the situation. I have read so many comments here that made me cringe, because I knew they were detailed enough that the parties involved would immediately recognize themselves if they read here (which admittedly they probably don’t, but you never know. And in the case of weddings especially, hundreds of people were probably at the event, so the chance that someone recognizes a comment about the event and passes it to the bride is a lot less remote). It happens, and it’s really naive to think it doesn’t.
Anon
As an example, someone this morning (in the thread about cancelling a wedding) made a judgy comment about a woman who split up with her husband shortly after the wedding. She included details about where the bachelore3tte party was, where the couple honeymooned, how soon after the wedding they broke up, and the woman’s new partner. I hope she had the good sense to “change the names” with respect to some of these details. But if she didn’t, I assure you that woman is immediately identifiable to anyone who knows her even a little bit, including professional contacts she probably wishes weren’t reading about her marital drama on the internet.
Anon
Not the Anon above, but I have ascertained the identities of several long-time commenters here.
This is why I advocate for believing a person’s interpretation of events without requiring more detail: if we disbelieve people who ask for advice unless they explain in specificity, we’re asking them to out themselves to those who know them.
Anon
eh certain people being able to indentify certain posters on occasion is still not the same as talking about a person who is expressly identifiable. It’s highly unlikely that a large group of people would also be able to make the same indentification you did. Sure someone who attended the wedding might know who the person is but I doubt every person commenting was able to make that identification
Pretty Primadonna
This is a great point…
Anonymous
I actually believe that all of the people here who are rushing to belle’s defense are her friends in real life (or her boyfriend). It is strange for people to be so protective of her. Her choice to announce her engagement as a way of “responding” to someone’s comment was…in line with how she has dealt with comments throughout the life of her blog. She gets defensive. It read very much like, “look at me, I did get what I was waiting for, snagged me a husband, so take that.”
Anon
I don’t believe all the defenders actually know Abra, mostly because the same thing happens any time someone says anything snarky about a celebrity. People here just love to accuse others of being judgmental, while being incredibly judgmental themselves.
Anonymous
when do people rush to the defense of “celebrities” here? I have been reading for 5 years, and this doesn’t sit right with me. i can’t remember a time that this happened. as someone mentioned earlier, this community is quick to judge everyone. also, only belle’s friends would call her a celebrity.
Anonymous
I always feel a little relieved when someone acknowledges this.
anon
OP, you’re coming off as very childish. That post on her blog was mean. Your post is mean. You’re doing the online version of talking behind someone’s back. No one was made better by reading your comment. Maybe it’s a little weird to announce your engagement in response to a mean comment but honestly who cares? Who is she hurting?
Anonymous
Says the anonymous person posting on the Internet to the other anonymous person posting on the Internet.
anon
Does the fact that I’m anon change the validity of what I wrote? No.
Anonymous
“You’re doing the online version of talking behind someone’s back.”
We do that here *literally all the time* including in this morning’s thread where people were talking about their family members, husbands, etc. I am so confused. Why does Abra get a pass??? Also, I would assert that it’s *not* behind her back – Abra can come and read these comments!
anon
Oh ffs.
I don’t know Abra, virtually or in real life. I don’t care who she is. I don’t read that blog. I don’t know why you think she’s getting “a pass,” because it’s not like she needs to be excused from poor behavior. What we do literally all the time here is discuss situations that *involve* other *anonymous* people, seeking advice, or feedback. Sometimes just to vent. Sometimes to share a laugh. Sometimes to commiserate. It’s done with those intentions, not simply to put down someone else (especially someone else who might see it). Discussing situations and asking for feedback is not the same as posting something mean about someone just for the sake of making fun of her/being mean. If you can’t see that then I can’t help you. This isn’t even a situation of discussing the substance of her blog or the quality of her advice– this is about her personal life. OPs post does not seem to be a good-faith critique of the blog, but just seemed like a cheap shot.
Anon
Lol
Anonymous
I think basically this lady went to law school and has a fiancé (whose opinions I don’t care about) and is working on her blog and whatnot and working part time at a quasi legal job. Nothing wrong with any of that. Sounds like she knows her limits, is living with limited or possibly no debt, has a good source of income and is reasonably happy.
I don’t care for her advice or style but wish her well. I just don’t relate to her at all. But I don’t know why people would feel the need to look down at her and post rude things on her blog – I mean if you don’t like her don’t click on her blog.
cbackson
I think it is possible to believe both that it’s fair to criticize how Belle operates her blog and engages with her public AND to think that some of the criticism is unnecessarily nasty and that way too much airtime is being spent on this.
She is a person who electively puts an enormous amount of her personal life into the public eye for business purposes. Her blog is a business. Her personal life is, essentially, what she uses to demonstrate her credentials to give advice to professional women (i.e., she can give fashion advice for professionals because she’s a professional; she can give life advice based on her own lived experience, etc.)
Do I think some of the criticism is mean spirited? Yes. Do I think people are giving way too much bandwidth to this? Yes. But describing this, as some have done below, as talking behind someone’s back, “Mean Girls,” etc. – again, her blog is a business. She makes her personal life public in support of that business. Acting like she’s a random person in Montana who keeps a personal blog isn’t a fair portrayal of the situation (and frankly, isn’t necessary to make the broader point that a lot of the comments are weirdly nasty and that there’s a lot of emotional bandwidth being spent on this).
Frankly, we ought to give her the respect of treating CapHillStyle like a professional endeavor, because it is – which means appropriate criticism is okay. Inappropriate criticism isn’t okay, but it also isn’t the same as socially ostracizing someone, because this isn’t a social interaction. She’s a media personality, albeit on a preciously small scale.
Anon
Clapping hands emoji to all of this.
Anon
I don’t follow her blog, I follow this one, but I was aware of it. I just went over and checked out the post you’re talking about.
Wow. I mean here is a woman who posted that she struggles with depression and anxiety, and you’re getting your jollies by trashing her on another website.
I get that she puts it out there and I guess she has to expect some negativity, but if you are patting yourself on the back for your own words and actions here, I think you should re-examine your own life choices.
Anon
This!
I don’t get the snark… from so many posters.
Alison
Ladies, many of you seriously have way too much time on your hands if you can spend your time snarking on something that someone did that does not hurt you or have a negative impact on your life. Newsflash: you don’t have to read blogs that you don’t like, you don’t have to like every action of bloggers (or any person for that matter), you shouldn’t hide behind a computer to say something you’d never say to someone’s face (this applies to many of you and to the person who posted the original mean comment on her blog). I come to Corporette for the content and because most of the time in the comments people ask for advice and people give genuinely helpful advice in a polite manner. You all have jobs and busy lives, and it’s great to have a community of working women here. But to take the time out of your busy days to debate how someone announced something on the internet, really? This is the 20-40 something year old equivalent of mean girls in middle school and that’s disturbing. You don’t have to like everyone, agree with everyone, etc., but please do think about being a good person even when cloaked with anonymity in blog comments. And full disclosure: I’m not a friend of the blogger in question or an acquaintance, but I do stand up to hate whenever I see it.
KTA
You obviously have never experienced “hate” if you think this is hate.
Abra is a snarky, snobby, overall boring person who is anti-feminist and antiquated. She gets brought up here because EVERY day someone recommends her blog for advice. Some of us obviously don’t care for it. We are allowed to discuss that here, despite your tone policing.
Alison
Sorry, KTA, but snark is form of hate. Hate takes many shapes and forms. Teasing is hate to some and they find it hurtful. Snark is hate to some and they find it hurtful. You don’t have to like her. It’s disturbing how mean you are to a person who you don’t know and who hasn’t hurt you. If someone recommends her blog for advice, and you don’t like her blog, then a polite, adult thing to say would be “I disagree, I personally don’t like her blog.” To get that sentiment across, you don’t have to use words that are degrading and derogatory.
anon
Any recs for a podiatrist in DC near Dupont Circle? I think I have a toenail fungus problem.
anon a mouse
I’ve been happy with Ian Beiser, as have several coworkers.
anon
Find a podiatrist who can treat the fungus with laser. I successfully zapped toenail fungus this way. It required multiple treatments, and a few follow-ups (like maybe after 12 months, and then again after another year) but it went away and has been gone for years at this point.
Anon
Also–wipe the inside of ALL of your shoes with alcohol-water (50/50 mix) and let them dry in the sun, and go to the pharmacist and ask them to order a product called Tineacide. It’s the only thing that’s ever worked…and it’s not Rx, just often not stocked. It takes about a month to work, but it does work. GL!
Interview Suit
Can anyone please help me out with an interview outfit? The interview is a final-round all-day series of interviews for a senior finance position at a high tech company. It’s in Seattle, and the recruiter specifically said the dress code is business casual and not to wear a suit. The thing is, I wear a suit or smart dress each day to work, and yoga pants at the weekend, so I don’t really have anything casual.
Does smart jeans (maybe J Crew?) + blouse (Ann Taylor?) + Jacket (from a suit maybe) + comfy shoes (Tom’s) sound acceptable? Any other suggestions? What would you do about a handbag? (could this be an excuse for a new one?!)
Anon
What about something like an Adrianna Papell origami sheath dress (not that they make those anymore, boo), heels, and a nice handbag?
If you are more of a pants person, very nice slacks in a suiting fabric, a silk blouse, killer jewelry, pointed toe flats or heels (depending on the hem of the pants), nice handbag.
anne-on
I’d repost in the AM, but I’d say your outfit sounds much too casual for even a business casual interview. I’d avoid jeans and wear real dress shoes at a minimum. Maybe ankle length chinos, blouse, blazer, and nice shoes/flats if you don’t wear heels (work flats, not Toms or Rothy’s or anything like that, save those for when you have the job).
Basically – what the model is wearing in your choice of pant color/blazer/shoe/blouse combo.
https://www.anntaylor.com/the-ankle-pant-in-crosshatch/490687?skuId=26922829&defaultColor=9599&catid=cata000013
Coach Laura
Interview suit – I’m in Seattle and in finance and know a lot of tech finance people. I wouldn’t wear jeans or Toms to an interview here. I think you’d want to aim toward “smart casual” not just casual for an interview. Angie from youlookfab is also in Seattle and she has a post of “Blazers and Bootcuts” that might give you some ideas. I’d say a non-suit suit jacket (not like part of a Brooks Brothers or Theory suit) in a bold color or interesting cut or something that makes you feel great and is memorable in a good way, a silky blouse (sure Ann Taylor) and trousers with booties or oxfords or loafers (I think Tom’s are too casual or at least what I picture when someone says Toms). We are still wearing booties so if your interview is in the next week or two that would still be fine.
I’ll post the link to the post in a reply.
Coach Laura
And yes, get a new bag. There are some ideas in the post.
Here’s the link. https://youlookfab.com/2018/02/23/ensemble-blazers-bootcuts/
Anon
I wouldn’t wear jeans; it’s still a job interview after all. There’s another category between business formal and athleisure — it’s business casual. I would wear slacks (not necessarily in a suiting fabric), a nice blouse, and a contrasting blazer. I’d wear flats because I have more options than heels, but you wear what you feel good in. I wouldn’t worry about your handbag; everybody in Seattle has some kind of Timbuk2-like messenger bag anyway. If anything, a flashy bag is not going to stand out in a good way.
Anon
No jeans! No suit!
Wear nice pants and blouse with a smart jacket! In essence, separates!
It doesn’t need to be a notched collar jacket, even collarless ones would work too!
Anonymous
Can anyone help with some size 12-16 ish office style inspiration, formal stuff.
The original Scarlett
DC women, what are you wearing to work right now? I’ve got a trip out your way next week and the weather forecast is confusing to this SF person.
Langue
Thinking of picking up French classes again at intermediate/advanced level. For those who have done a language before in an area where there aren’t many native speakers how did you improve? What strategies did you use?
Maudie Atkinson
This coming late in the day, so you might want to repost in the morning, but two things I’d recommend:
First, if your city has an Alliance Francaise, check out classes and events there. Second, I’ve found Duo Lingo to be a nice brush up on grammar.
anon
I have two colorful Oxford shirts that I mostly wear with jeans. How would I style them for work to look cute, not dowdy?
Anonymous
Will page again in the morning thread but I recommend Italki. It’s a platform for linking teachers (including “professional” teachers with certifications) with students all over the world, and lessons usually take place over Skype. I’m at a similar level in French and have been studying 2-3x / week, 30 mins – 1.5 hours/session with a fantastic professional teacher who teaches in Paris (I found someone who is a good fit after trying a few different teachers); she’s been helping me brush up on general fluency as well as prep for the DALF C1 exam.
You can also do a language exchange with native speakers on the same platform if you have the time (e.g., 30 minutes in English, then 30 minutes in French with someone who is a French speaker but wants to learn English (or whatever other language you are fluent in)).
If you need a referral code ($10 to each for lessons) you can google for professional bloggers who introduce the platform and include the referral link, or if you post a burner email here I can send you my link.
Anonymous
Oops, this was meant to be in response to Langue seeking French lessons above.