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Updated: Nov 1, 2018 177 Comments · by

Coffee Break – Plum Quasar Patent

Coffee Break

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Stuart Weitzman - Dolly (Plum Quasar Patent) - FootwearC'mon, you know I can't pass up a good purple pump — especially not one on sale. These highly-rated Stuart Weitzman shoes are super high (4.25″!!!) so these are not for the faint-hearted — but if you're a fan of tall heels, these have your name all over them. They were $298, but are now marked from $160-$195 at Zappos. Stuart Weitzman – Dolly (Plum Quasar Patent) (L-2)

Sales of note for 9.10.24

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Comments

  1. Anon

    Posted this late in this morning’s thread but thought I would repost here to try to get a better response…

    Any recommendations for a rolling briefcase/bag that can hold a small laptop as well as several large binders? My problem with most is that they look too masculine or that they have so much going on inside it’s hard to really fit much in there. I am a self-proclaimed bag snob so it must not be ugly but it must be very user friendly. Am I asking for too much?

      • Magdeline

        Wow, that looks great!! So the wheels detach? I might have to invest in this.

        • Ellen

          I got a New LAPTOP and case from the manageing partner. It has WHEELS so that I do NOT have to Carry it around and UP the stairs. It is NOT light, either.

          It is the same one that is on GOSSIP Girl! I feel like Blair Waldorff, but I was told by the manageing partner that I am so pretty I can be on the show!

          But then he made me do 3 new EBT’s. FOOEY on him!

          • Liz

            I got a bag that comes in a model with wheels and a model without. I stupidly chose the model without. Does anyone know of wheels you can buy separately? The bag has a zippered section at the back that allows you to latch it over a suitcase, so I think it should be easy to put wheels through it if I could only find some. Thanks!

            P.S. This is the bag, and I highly recommend it for the quality, organization, etc. It’s just very heavy to lug around. http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B002B8IQMS/ref=oh_o01_s00_i00_details

    • Southern Legal

      My boss bought me one of the Crop in Style rolling bags, as I had worn out my last rolling briefcase carrying binders, etc. for him on a big case we’re working on. Yes, technically it is for crafting/scrapbooking, but it is absolutely fabulous for work. Basic black canvas, a tall adjustable handle, sturdy wheels, lots of pockets on the sides, handy places for multiple pens/pencils/highlighters, and the interior has padded adjustable/detachable dividers with plenty of space for a laptop and at least a couple large binders/redwelds. Amazon carries it for $132, but if you watch it, it goes on sale frequently. Several of the attorneys in our office got theirs for around $100.

      http://www.amazon.com/Crop-In-Style-NaNavigator-Tote-Black/dp/B003N4GFQS/ref=sr_1_4?ie=UTF8&qid=1328646666&sr=8-4

      • Homestar

        That looks like a great bag. As a PSA, I would encourage you to review this on Amazon. As someone who relies on customer reviews all.the.time., it really helps when a product has several glowing reviews. I am really hesitant (usually) to buy a product with only one review unless I have already checked it out in a store.

    • Peony

      I just bought this one – Sherpani Flite – in black. I’m in love with it. I’ve found their handbags can be a little spotty on quality (the fabric’s too thick and heavy) but it works great for larger bags. Has a little bit of cute factor with the embroidery and interior flowers, but I don’t stick out at a conference.
      http://www.ebags.com/product/sherpani/flite/206370?productid=10115099

      Plenty of room for my laptop, tablet, files, lunch, purse, a good organizer pocket – but even with all that it doesn’t seem large.

  2. Always a NYer

    These pumps are gorgeous! I’m just debating my ability to walk in such a pretty, and very high, shoe…

  3. KinCA

    Does anyone have any experience with or recommendations on reselling designer watches (namely, Rolex)?

    My mom is experiencing some financial difficulties and has a few Rolex watches that she rarely wears and would like to sell to raise some money. I’ve Googled but there’s so many websites offering to buy back your watch that it’s a bit overwhelming. Should we sell online or find a jewelry store in town? Should we eBay it?

    Thanks in advance!

    • Anon

      I live in a smaller town and the local jewelry store will buy back “estate” jewelry – I don’t know how good the price they offer is, but it’s probably worth going in and having an offer made, at least. Good luck!

    • Bluejay

      My uncle has a side business restoring and reselling fancy watches through eBay. Since your mom only has a few watches, it may be hard to go this route; people are understandably leery of buying big-ticket items from unknown sellers with no positive reviews. Also, eBay and PayPal give buyers an enormous amount of power and don’t always let sellers refute accusations of fraud, etc, such that your mother could find herself without a watch and without payment if she sold to an unscrupulous buyer (see, e.g., http://consumerist.com/2012/01/paypal-tells-buyer-to-destroy-purchased-violin-instead-of-return-for-refund.html). Given all this, she’d probably have better luck at an antique store, estate jewelry dealer, or similar. She should definitely do an in-person sale, rather than finding a site online. If she’s taken the watches to be appraised at a reputable, small (not chain) jewelry store, the store should also be able to recommend where she could sell it. (Be leery of any store that offers to buy it after appraising it without your getting a second appraisal; if they’re buying it, they have an incentive to lowball the appraisal.)

    • Homestar

      Try a local jewelry store and see if they would sell it on consignment. I’m sure they will take a cut of the proceeds, but that might net your Mom more than if she sells it directly to a jeweler. I also agree with Bluejay that selling watches on eBay would be tough, both because the risk of fraud and because your Mom probably doesn’t have the history/reviews that would make eBay buyers comfortable for an item like this.

    • ss

      The advice above is pretty sensible but do also use the internet to figure out fair values before you head into a local store. Look at the specialist sites which offer Rolexes for sale as well as the ones offering to buy, since there is a well-established global market for used Rolexes. For example the sportier versions have become very collectible in recent years (Daytonas, Submariners) and will typically command a big premium over the regular dress models (Oysters etc).

      Good luck !

  4. ARRGHH need to vent

    Grumble, our big bosses are coming in town later this week, so all of management is really stressed out. Every time you ask a question, they snap at you. They’re asking the status of every project every five minutes. They huff and puff when you walk into the room. It’s not my fault the big bosses are coming, don’t snap at me for it! Don’t shoot the messenger, you know? I hope the rest of you are having a better day/week…. is it Memorial Day yet?

  5. DillyBar

    Wow, if only my ankle injury didn’t keep me out of 4in+ heels!

    So I’ve just dropped 30lbs (yay!) and am down to a BMI of 21 (also yay!). I am having a problem adjusting, though. I know I look better, but I feel fatter than ever – my tummy’s more noticeable, and I am wearing the correct size foundation garments but they dig in and make my back look flubby. Anyone have any tips for navigating this weird phase? I’m exercising, etc., but seem to be driving myself nuts!

    • Anon

      Congrats on being more healthy.

      I don’t have advice, but I’ll commiserate – I have a ‘tummy’ that stays the same size no matter what my weight is. My weight has fluctuated by 30-40 lbs over the past ten years. When I’m in great shape and at my leanest, I will get a pregnancy comment/question at least once a month. At first, I was really hard on myself. Now, it’s just predictable and funny.

      • L

        Congrats!

        Keep up with weight training – nothing helps sculpt like weights. That helps me with jiggle in unsightly places.

        I am a big fan of a cami and/or tshirt to help smooth out ripples from your bra. not always a perfect solution, but imo it helps minimize a bit.

      • southanon

        There was a great piece in the newest Real Simple by a woman who always had a tummy and learned to accept it. It took her decades, I only hope I can accept mine in less time.

    • anon

      Up your cardio, it’s the quickest way to notice the fat melt away.

      And congrats on the weight loss!

      • L

        No! If she has a BMI of 21 she doesn’t need to melt fat, she needs to build muscle. Weight training not cardio is the solution here.

    • a.

      Remind yourself that you are beautiful. Focus on how good exercise makes you feel, or how happy you are to be fueling your body properly with healthy, nutritious foods.

      I absolutely do not mean this in a cliche, earth-mama crunchy-granola kind of way. I mean it in the way that every one of us has little things about our bodies that we don’t like…but that if we fixate on those attributes, we risk driving ourselves insane in an attempt to achieve some “perfect body” that doesn’t exist. We all have our flubby backs or child-bearing hips or thunder thighs or [insert body part here].

      Also, if you feel like your mental image of your body doesn’t match up with what you objectively know that it is, that can be a warning bell for disordered eating. Not saying this is true for you, just wanted to make sure you were aware.

    • DillyBar

      Thanks, everyone! I really appreciate your thoughts (please keep’em coming!)

      @a I’m definitely keeping an eye out for disordered eating, but thank you for mentioning it – it’s important.

      • anon

        You’re clearly at a healthy weight, so keep up the good work!

        Short of “tightening” the stomach muscles with crunches and other exercises (I don’t know if that works or not – it probably varies by person) I think your options are to either A- accept it and love it, B- find ways to hide it with clothes etc, or C- get excess fat removed surgically. (Since you’ve already lost weight and intend to keep it off, you’d be a good candidate for C)

        Do whatever makes you happy! Congratulations again on the weight loss!

      • AnonOne

        I find that tight-ish camisoles really help smooth things out in the tummy area. I wear them under everything, including t shirts.

        • Anon

          I wear the Spanx camisoles a lot. They smooth everything out without being suffocating. I have a “5 finger” diastasis from my second pregnancy, so I always have a belly. I keep hoping for that hernia so insurance will pay for the tummy tuck. :-)

  6. Circe

    Etiquette question:

    Emailed big partner, who is in the office today. His out of office reply says “I am out of the office, returning on Tuesday, February 7.” Do I let him know that his autoreply is still on, or assume that the people getting bouncebacks will figure out that he is in today? I would want to know if I forgot to turn off my auto reply, but I don’t know about others…

    Thanks!

    • TechAnon

      If he’s several levels above you, I wouldn’t be the one to tell him. Let someone closer to him do that.

    • TCFKAG

      Does he have an assistant? I might swing by her desk or shoot her a quick e-mail to let her/him know and she/he can switch it off or let him know.

      • TCFKAG

        ha…just noticed I switched to gender neutral pronoun slashes half way through that sentence. Kind of ruins the purpose.

  7. Research, Not Law

    Exfoliants recommendations?

    I’ve been using St Ives Apricot Scrub for nearly two decades. I have no complaints but am thinking that I should see what else is available. I have sensitive skin. Drug store brands are most convenient for me, but I would consider other options.

    • Always a NYer

      I love the Aveeno daily exfoliating cleanser. It’s super gentle and I’m able to see and feel the difference with my skin.

      • Steller

        I’ve used Philosophy’s Microdelivery Exfoliating Wash daily for a few years and I love it. It has just the right amount of scrub without being really harsh on my skin like the apricot scrub was.

        • bizzy

          Second this. I love Philosophy’s Microdelivery Exfoliating Wash. I switched from St. Ives when I turned 40 and started to feel like I needed to go a little lighter on my skin – but still needed genuine exfoliation.

    • Research, Not Law

      Thanks for both recs. That’s exactly where I am now: my aging skin would seem to appreciate a milder product.

      Silly question: I noticed both have “daily” in the name. Do you actually use them daily? I’m accostomed to exfoliating a couple of times a week.

      • anon

        I do use it daily. I’m 23 with acne thanks to going off BC so my skin needs all the turnover it can get. I used the Aveeno at night in the shower and in the mornings I use a foam cleanser by Aveda with my Clarisonic.

      • Steller

        I use the Philosophy scrub every morning in the shower, since I don’t have makeup to take off and therefore don’t need to rub it around my eyes. I use Cetaphil at night to take off makeup. Cheap, works great, and doesn’t dry my face out. I feel like this combination of the two products is not too harsh on my 40-year old face.

      • Aging

        Re aging: I always had very oily skin that was impervious to any harsh thing I did to it. Daily exfoliating? No problem. Anti-oil cleansers with salyclic acid or hydroxy every day? No problem. Tons of benzoyl peroxide? No problem.

        When I turned 42, one day an area about two inches in diameter around my lip/chin/nose got red and had lots of little white pimply blisters. My dermatologist told me I had rosacea and interrogated me about what products I had recently started using. There was nothing new in my regimen. Nothing. Finally, she said “sometimes, as you age, your skin just changes and gets sensitive.” She put me on Oracea, and it went away in a couple weeks.

        Starting that day, I am “allowed” to wash my face twice a day with liquid Johnson & Johnson Purpose (with my hands). Once a week, I am “allowed” to exfoliate very gently with scrubby gloves or a washcloth and liquid Purpose.

        In addition, I use oil-free SPF 15/PAA++ moisturizer every day and a retinol from my dermatologist (made by Replenix) every night. That is it. And my skin looks terrific.

        Maybe we are just getting old? I am 45.

        • Em

          What sunscreen do you use? Currently using Cetaphil AM but I think I need more UVA protection.

          • Aging

            I use Shiseido White Lucent Moisturizing Lotion SPF 15/PA++. My dermatologist wants me to use Cetaphil UVA/UVB Defense SPF 50, but it is waaaaay to creamy and heavy and gives me pimples. I have tried Kiehls Super Fluid UV Defense SPF 50, which was only slightly too heavy for me, so you might like that. My main issue is making sure that there is both UVA (aging) and UVB (burning) protection. SPF speaks only to UVB protection. It is the PA +, ++ or +++ mark that speaks to UVA protection. And so far, in the US, it is not mandatory to note that on your packaging. I believe that will change this year or next, and I hope that many more formulations of UVA/UVB sunscreens that currently are available to me only abroad will become widely available in the US.

            I actually put together a chart of each sunscreen ingredient and whether it protects against UVA or UVB rays, and I keep it in my contacts on my iPhone. Whenever I am considering a sunscreen purchase, I consult that list. If I knew how to post that list here, I would be happy to.

          • Ruby

            best one handsdown for faces: skinceuticals universal tint 50. no chemicals (those degrade after an hour or two anyway) just physical blockers, but goes on better than any other brand of physicals. try it! get it online or at my derm (skin cancer prone person here).

          • Aging

            UVB:
            AMINOBENZOIC ACID (PABA)
            CINOXATE
            DIOXYBENZONE
            ENSULIZOLE (PHENYLBENZIMIAZOLE SULFONIC ACID)
            HOMOSALATE
            OCTOCRYLENE
            OCTINOXATE (OCTYL METHOXYCINNAMATE)
            OCTOSALATE (OCTYL SALICYLATE)
            OXYBENZONE
            PADIMATE O
            SULISOBENZONE
            TROLAMINE SALICYLATE
            TITANIUM DIOXIDE
            ZINC OXIDE

            UVA1 (long)
            AVOBENZONE
            ZINC OXIDE

            UVA2 (short)
            DIOXYBENZONE
            ECAMSULE (MEXORYL SX)
            MERADIMATE (MENTHYL ANTHRANILATE)
            OXYBENZONE
            SULISOBENZONE
            TITANIUM DIOXIDE

          • Em

            @Aging and Ruby (can’t reply under your comments): Thanks! I currently use retin-A at night for acne, along with Cerave AM (not Cetaphil). As woman of color (around Beyonce’s skin tone), I need something that won’t leave a white cast or cause breakouts but will still have a decent amount of UVA protection and will be moisturizing enough to deal with retin-A caused dryness. The Cerave meets all of these except great UVA protection. Kiehls used to make a fantastic SS with mexoryl but unfortunately they discontinued it. I’ll try to get a sample of the Kiehls Super Fluid next time I’m at a Kiehls store.

    • Godzilla

      I love the Queen Helene mint scrub, which I order from drugstoredotcom. The beads are finer and there are more of them, it feels really good.

    • Ahava

      I like Ahava’s Gentle Mud Exfoliator. Link in next comment to avoid moderation. Some drugstores in So Cal carry this, as does Ulta.

    • Homestar

      I also used to use St. Ives Apricot Scrub, but years ago I switched to Pretty Feet & Hands Rough Skin Remover. It is wonderful for exfoliation. I use it everywhere (including my face on occasion). I have sensitive skin and it has never made me break out or have issues. This is one of those few products that I can just rave about. My skin instantly feels softer after using it. And, it is so, so much cheaper than most of my skin care products. Link to follow.

  8. Another foot issue

    Apologies in advance if this is TMI.

    Something weird is happening to my left foot. When my foot is wet (and yes, I often have sweaty feet), it gets a sponge-like growth on the ball of the foot. When the foot is dry, this is like a very coarse callous, but the sponge-like holes are still somewhat visible. This has been going on for a while, and it’s weirding me out (both because I don’t know what it is or how to get rid of it, and because it seems weird that it’s only happening on one foot!). I’ve tried very hard to keep my feet as dry as possible, I’ve tried anti-fungal creams, I’ve tried pumicing it, but nothing seems to get rid of it. Does anybody have any idea what this could be (and yes, I know I should probably see a doctor, which will likely come next)? Thanks!

    • Sconnie

      Sounds like plantar warts. Depending on how many and how big they are, there are a number of ways podiatrists can treat them, from freezing them off with liquid nytrogen to burning them off with lasers.

        • Veronica

          Anecdotal evidence time! I suffered through both of those excruciatingly painful treatments to remove a plantar wart on my toe, but they were totally ineffective. What worked for me was the drugstore wart pads with the crazy amounts of acid. Extra strength! Good luck.

          • Bluejay

            Yes, same here. Multiple, excruciating liquid nitrogen treatments did nothing. Applying acid (I had some kind that was a liquid with a brush) and putting a bandaid over it got rid of it, finally. And I had that wart for years, literally.

          • k

            Back-up anecdotal evidence time!

            I did the same, about 10 years ago–had a really big one lasered off the bottom of my heel. Couldn’t walk for 2 weeks–it left a crater. It came back. The only thing that worked were those crazy-acid drugstore pads. That, and (sorry, TMI) some “self-surgery” once the acid started to kill it.

          • springtime

            My doctor put acid on and then froze it (double whammy, I guess)- a good doctor will make sure to target the freezing so you don’t burn any normal skin (I had one who did it from too far back so it splashed and burned the soft part of your foot- ouch). I had a few and yes it hurt to walk for a day after, but it shouldn’t be excruciating. I had to go 3-4 times until they finally all fell off.

            It’s a pain to get done but so worth it.

      • anone

        Ahh, that didn’t even come to my mind but I think you may be on the nose. Another Foot Issue, does it hurt at times when pressure is applied? I’ve had 2 plantar warts. When “dry” they weren’t as hard a callouses but they were rougher than my own skin. When “wet” they were spongy. But, they also hurt but maybe because the roots were near a nerve of some sort.

        I’d definitely get it checked out sooner than later. You don’t want to mess around with plantar warts. The roots grow up and the longer the roots, the harder they are to remove and the more painful it is to remove them. If it’s fungus then you don’t want to spread it to your other foot, your SO’s feet or anyone else’s for that matter.

        Good luck!

    • TCFKAG

      Not to sound too much like Summer from the OC, but eeewwww.

      To the podiatrist and/or dermatologist with you. Or at least your PCP.

    • springtime

      Wouldn’t be surprised if it’s a plantar wart. they spread if left untreated so I would get it removed asap.

      • In-House Europe

        Oh man, I just spent 10 minutes reading up on plantar’s warts. Do not watch the you tube video people!!

    • cc

      I agree its probably warts, you should see a doctor. And this is not aimed to you but in general if you are about to post on corporette and need to include the sentence “i guess I should probably see a doctor” skip the corporette and go straight to the doctor! We have had a lot of these lately and I think the answer is almost always go to the doctor.

      • Anon

        I don’t know, as long as people aren’t posting “I’m having heart palpitations and numbness in my left arm, what do you think?,” I kind of like the bizarre and benign medical oddity questions. So many of these things are common or problems we’d discuss with close girlfriends when we were younger (in college or grad school), but many of us don’t have that luxury anymore. I for one do not want to call my girlfriends and use my irregular convo with them to discuss odd symptoms, etc.

        • cc

          stronger stomache than me then :) I make the ehhhnoooaaah face when ever anyone tries to tell me about growths on their body- I saw that treeman video and I don’t think I have ever fully recovered

          • Magdeline

            Holy cr*p, I forgot about that treeman video until now. My fiance had me watch it to tease me because he knows of my wart-phobia. If that ever happened to me, I think that I would need to be sedated… I am getting the chills now just thinking of it.

      • Magdeline

        Ew, yes, I think it is a plantar’s wart. I had one similar to that on my rightfoot. The doctor tried to freeze it off, and, over the next week, it exploded into a huge cluster of warts. (I am extremely phobic of such things and of warts spreading- don’t touch!!! – so I was freaking out.) After I expressed my extreme unhappiness and unwillingness to try freezing again, she then injected it with something that she called “wart chemo”- some small dosage of a chemotherapy drug. It went away super quickly, and never came back! If I ever get another, it is getting injected immediately. I suggest that you talk to your doctor/derm. about different possibilities.

      • Bluejay

        I don’t think anyone’s posting instead of going to the doctor, but rather to get an idea of what they might need to discuss with the doctor and whether they should ask for an urgent appointment. Also, it’s reassuring to know that you’re normal and other women have had the same problem.

      • TCFKAG

        I think its less about “diagnose me please” and more about “oh my god this weird thing is going on with me, tell me I’m not the only one this has ever happened to before”. Health concerns can be incredibly isolating because we don’t talk about them in “polite” conversation and as a result we can feel very lonely. So if someone wants to hear that they’re not along on here — well, it doesn’t bother me too much.

        As long as they also go see a doctor.

        • cc

          Yeah, I get grossed out so easy, I jumped the gun with that comment. Im so sensitive I literally feel like throwing up seeing that, but I have plenty of my own body issue things! It is good to be able to commiserate

          • Godzilla

            I wonder about this. I knew some people feel physically ill to the point where they actually would vomit upon seeing/smelling/hearing about something gross and I always thought there was something wrong with me because I don’t feel this way. If I see vomit or someone actually hurling, I don’t feel like vomiting. Or anything typically “gross” for that matter. Yeah, I get horrified and grossed out and scarred and I shudder but is it only me? Am I odd bc of this?

          • cc

            See blood doesn’t bother me. Like I’ve seen someone cut to the bone before and been ok. But the description of the foot made me feel ill and then I like thought about it throughout the day I found it so gross.

            haha mamabear even the name of that sounds scary!

        • Circe

          I’m with you, TCFKAG. I like it because it’s a “safe” place where we can talk about stuff that might be awkward with face-to-face friends.

    • Another foot issue

      Thanks all for your helpful responses! It sounds like it’s probably plantar warts, ugh. I just booked an appointment with a podiatrist.

  9. SF Bay Associate

    Part of Zappos’ clearance, I expect. I need a new pair of flats, and I saw that the Gentle Souls Bayside was well rated and on sale, so I had Nordstrom price match Zappos’ sale price :). Hopefully, these are winners because my current pair of commuting flats is beyond dead.

  10. b23

    I’m sitting in my office with my sunglasses on because the sun shines *directly* into my offices in the afternoon. It gets hot, and the constant sunshine gives me a headache. Any ideas? I’d like to do curtains but am afraid that would be too girly. I’ve heard there’s clear but reflective stuff you can put on the windows. Does that work if you put it on the inside? Where do you get it?

    Thanks in advance! I’m feeling like a baked potato right now.

    • Research, Not Law

      I’ve always been fortunate to have blinds, but here are approaches that friends or coworkers have used:

      Tension rods at top and bottom of window with a flat (not gathered) curtain in a mod print. It was a brand new LEED building, so hanging permanent blinds were not allowed. The rods are completely removable and the effect was certainly not girly.

      Two office areas with major skylights used large umbrellas at work stations, as in the beach/tiki variety that can be angled. I admit it always makes me giggle, but it’s effective.

      The film should work in the interior. I think you can get it at home depot / lowes or ikea?

      • b23

        I do have blinds, but somehow they don’t work well enough. I’ve tried pointing them both directions, but it’s almost like the sun just reflects off of the blinds straight into my office.

        By the way, why are permanent blinds not allowed in a LEED building? It seems like they would be encouraged. In fact, my building is brand new and LEED, and we all have blinds.

        • Research, Not Law

          Utilizing natural lighting is one way of earning a LEED “point.” With the design of this particular building (office around the parameter/windows and cubicles and conference rooms in the center), office-holders were told they could not block the light coming in their windows. Granted, once they got LEED certified, I don’t think there are “follow-ups,” but apparently the building manager was quite dedicated. It was a friend’s office, so I don’t know all the details. Maybe she also had blinds that weren’t doing the trick.

    • Fiona

      I had this exact problem last year, and I finally asked to move offices to a northeast facing side of the building because I was getting so many headaches from the glare. I felt like a dainty daisy asking for the office change, but it has made such a huge difference in my daily experience that it was absolutely worth it. Any chance you could do something similar?

      • L

        Assuming your company doesn’t own the building you’re in, could you talk directly to building management? They may be able to do some type of tint for you and if you’re worried about the girly/dainty factor, no one in your firm would know.

        If not, amazon has a lot of options if you search window tint. You could also put a tension rod behind your blinds and hang a plain curtain to help you from roasting!

    • Bluejay

      I think it’s fine to do curtains. If you don’t want them to be girly, then just pick some rather plain ones. You could also get one of those tri-fold screens and put it in front of the window to block light.

    • GerryMcGrew

      I had the same problem but my glare was triggering migraines. I explained to my boss how the glare was triggering my migraines and explained to him what happens when I get them. As a result, the building installed woven shades rather than blinds (they roll up into their own shadow box on the top and I can pull them down when needed). They still add a bit of light in but it’s extremely filtered. Unbelievable difference. I’m moving offices (upgrade) this year and have already warned my partner that I’m going to ask for the same window treatment.

    • ESquared

      I have this problem in 1 of the rooms in my parent’s house. It makes everything crazy hot & you wake up as soon as the sun goes up…. the reason that blinds don’t work is because it’s a semi-circle window. We used dark film, it works great, but It’s kind of ugly (we have the black-ish one)– it’s very similar to the film on tinted car window.
      http://www.sears.com/shc/s/t_10153_12605?tName=light-blocking-window-film.html&i_cntr=1328675892909
      I’ve also seen the decorative ones at Jo-Anne’s & I think my mom got her’s at walmart or target.

    • Pip

      There’s polarizing film that’s pretty clear but still filters out a certain percentage of the sunlight. You should definitely run this by the building manager, since there might be technical reasons to use/not use certain solutions, and they might have some good ideas as well. And talk to the HR department or your boss, since your working environment is unhealthy.

  11. jobseeker

    Thread Jack re Job Search:

    I need some advice, thoughts. I had a second interview for my dream in house job Wednesday week that went well. I was asked for references and I provided three. The potential employer emailed to let me know she had sent out emails to the three reference providers. I heard back from one the reference providers on Thursday last week, that he had a great conversation with the potential employer (I asked all reference providers before providing their names). I have not heard from the other two references or the potential employer. Should I follow up with the other reference providers to see if they have been contacted? I would hate to be bug-a-boo, however the suspense is killing me. Is it too soon to follow up with the employer? I want to be proactive but not overbearing. thoughts please??? Thanks!

    • anon

      Nope, don’t follow up yet. Send a thank-you to the employer asap if you haven’t yet, but don’t follow up on the references.

  12. In-House Europe

    For those who remember my self-doubting post last week – where I wrote that I had asked for a promotion and was feeling guilty because we are planning to start trying for a second child soon…I got the promotion!!! It is still not public at work so I can’t tell people there about it – but luckily I can share here.

    Am super excited and a little overwhelmed – I am now on the same level as people 2 times my age but I just keep telling myself that they wouldn’t have given me the raise if they thought I couldn’t do it.

    It is still not public

    • Research, Not Law

      Missed the OP, but congratulations!!!

      For what it’s worth, I still went ahead with our plans for a second child even after being selected for my company’s leadership development track. I was a nervous about how it would look, but baby is due in a couple of weeks and it all seems to be working smoothly.

      • anon

        Research, Not Law –

        Any tips on things you did well to make it work so smoothly?

        Signed,

        Very Similar Situation Several Months Behind

        • Research, Not Law

          Nothing too much beyond the normal staying-professional-while-pregnant stuff. Knowing what first tri was like, I did wait a few months to get established before getting pregnant. I was able to make connections, stake out my role, make progress, etc before hitting that awkward period when my work goes downhill. I did my best to arrange my workload to hit in 2nd tri and early 3rd tri. I also made sure that I’d clear the first big deadline before maternity leave. (LOL, although a delay – completely out of my control – did push back that deadline to my EDD! I completed in advance and arranged for someone else to present if I have may baby sooner).

          I never commented about the timing relative to the professional transition and certainly made no apology for getting pregnant. I proceeded with a matter-of-fact “this is what’s happening” attitude, which seemed to have worked. Then I portrayed that my job was still a priority by continuing to do it well. I tried to make it difficult for someone to reference my pregnancy as a reason why I shouldn’t have been selected. Maternity leave is obviously challenging for an organization, but since I’ve been in the position for a year I feel justified in having the time off.

          Interestingly, I felt unexpectedly empowered to be saying “I can kick @ss in my career *and* have the family I want.” It feels good.

          PS – I should mention that I work for a pretty family-friendly company. Most people have families, although most women have only one child.

          • Research, Not Law

            Hmmm… I should also mention that it was exhausting to do it all. My post made it sound like no big deal. Fighting morning sickness and fatigue to put in a full day’s work only to return home to a toddler that needs (and deserves) my attention was hard. Keeping up by working after her bedtime was impossible (I was often asleep before she was), so I would try to get a couple of hours in on the weekends. It was a vastly different experience than my first, when I did what I could at work, indulged in carefully planned prenatal exercise and healthy snacks, and relaxed on the couch in the evenings.

            So tips for home: Don’t be hard on yourself for not being perfect. My daughter and I watched a lot of TV, which was a complete no-no before. We snuggled on the couch and chatted about the show, so I could partially appease my guilt. I focused on being a warm and attentive mom… even if I wasn’t such a fun mom. My husband took on all household duties and what he couldn’t do either didn’t happen or was hired out. (We ate a lot of take-and-bake pizza and cereal for dinner…) Set realistic goals for work and home so that you can rest. Unisom sleep tabs are an absolute necessity; you’ll get good sleep and wake up without nausea, which puts you on the right track.

            I often felt like I was putting my family behind my career in the short term (although my sweet husband disagrees), so I had to constantly remind myself that it would pay off in the long term.

  13. Almost there!

    I’m four months away from the end of my year-long internship and meeting with my boss tomorrow to discuss my career prospects. I have a general idea what arease I’d like to work in and what I want to do but would love to hear the hive’s input.

    Are there things you wish you knew/had done when you were just starting out? Thanks!

  14. Magdeline

    Threadjack:

    Has anyone ever gotten a semi-permanent gloss/glaze done on your hair? I am thinking about getting one done just for a bit more depth/shine, but I’m a little nervous that it will dry out my hair rather than making it shiny.

    • anon

      I did and liked it very much. I’m very low maintenance with color, so it was perfect for me. It just amped up my hair color and made it shinier.

    • MJ

      My stylist does my roots’ regrowth with permanent and does a semipermanent gloss on the rest of my hair. (I am an auburn-y brunette with super-dry, curly hair.) The reason she does the gloss is precisely because of my dry hair…so I think your stylist is on the right track, based on my experience!

    • TCFKAG

      I did. Its a lower cost, lower impact version of a keratin treatment (or at least that’s what I think of it as.) My hair was silky and shiny and beautiful. It was a great choice…speaking of…maybe I need to make a hair appointment.

      • ESquared

        I’ve done both– it’s not really like a keratine treatment (k makes my very curly hair pretty much straight, and frizz free, AND shiny– it’s basically a miracle, if not one that makes me question what kind of long term health hazards I’m facing ;-p). The gloss is nice though, it makes you look like you’ve used that great conditioner that comes with hair dye. And prob has less potential side effects. ;-)

    • Equity's Darling

      Yup, I do them to add more depth and shine to my brown hair.

      Totally love them, and my hair is smoother afterwards. I also tend towards drier/frizzier hair, so I think they’re amazing.

      I’d recommend giving it a try- it only lasts 6-8 weeks I think, so if you hate it, it’s really only a short-term change.

    • Mountain Girl

      Try an olive oil soak – especially if you have some length to your hair. When my hair starts looking dull and drab it is a true miracle cure and you probably already have it in your pantry.

      Put a little bit on your hands and rub it into the length of your hair. Twist your hair up or braid it and go to bed. In the morning wash as normal and your hair will be soft and shiny. I do this about twice and month and have found it has even tamed those coarse wild gray hairs that are starting to pop up. Go to YouTube and check out some of the recommendations on there.

      • ESquared

        Oh oh– try Jojoba, you can get it at Trader Joe’s!!!! It’s great too. I lived on having it in my hair/face/body/everything when I was on accutane (dried EVERYTHING out).

    • Magdeline

      Thanks for the input!! I’m excited; I think I’m going to go for it!

    • Anon

      I did it for years until I got too gray and had to go permanent. The gloss makes such a difference. I’d also highly recommend Moroccan Oil if you wear your hair straight or blow it out. It makes your hair super shiny without being greasy.

  15. Aguacatechica

    I wrote last week about getting a job offer from a public interest organization but really wanting a position with a state government agency that I had interviewed with, and wondering whether or not to tell the state about the job offer in order to nudge them along in their decision. I took the advice I got from here and it worked! I was given an offer by the state by the end of the week! THANKS SO MUCH to the ladies who wrote in and encouraged me to do some polite nudging. I’m now working in government much sooner than I had ever dreamed I would be!

  16. Fiona

    Update to my complaining about the real estate market a few weeks ago — we just put an offer on a condo this afternoon! Now I’m spinning in my chair and having no luck at all getting any work done at all. Waiting = torture!

    • Tra la la

      Congrats! Fingers crossed . . . we are still on the hunt for our house. I keep telling myself that I need to be patient.

    • JJS

      We are still having no success but I’m glad someone is! Good luck and I hope you get it!

  17. Blonde Lawyer

    For those of you with nice, fancy, ergonomic office chairs – did your office pay for them or did you foot the bill yourself? Along the lines of TPFKAG’s post about not wanting to spend money on yourself, I have trouble spending money on things for the office that I think work should be paying for.

    Normally, I am great about asking (and getting) what I need. But, everyone (including head partners) at my firm uses the same big over-sized vinyl conference room chairs. I was able to get an ergonomic desk setup which makes my life so much better, but I’m still sitting in a conference room chair. I’m in a small firm where I think I’m already seen as a little high maintenance because I’ve asked for (and received) much more than those that came before me. I’m afraid asking for the chair would be over the top (for this office.)

    On top of that, I’ve been asking for a headset (hate speaker and without it my neck/shoulder hurts) but I had no idea they were hundreds of dollars. Partner initially said “find a cheaper one.” I have a loaner now from the phone guy but that one is pricey too for permanent use.

    I’m not sure I can pull off asking for both but I don’t want to cross any invisible taboos by buying myself office stuff (like a fancy chair.) Part of me doesn’t want to give the impression of “oh, just say no, I’ll buy it myself.” Part of me doesn’t want to look “different” from the rest w/ my fancy chair and headset. But, I know ergonomics are important and I don’t want to short myself either.

    What have you done?

    • Former MidLevel

      I don’t know how big your firm is or if they do this kind of thing, but at my firm I asked HR for an “ergonomic assessment” and they actually had an ergonomist come in, evaluate my workspace, and make recommendations. It seemed to help that it was *him* making the suggestions, not me.

    • Bluejay

      Although I would normally never recommend to buy your own office supplies, in this case, where even the partners are using the cheapo chairs, I think it is unreasonable to ask for something that no one else has unless it is truly, genuinely a medical need. In your case, I think you should buy the chair yourself. Then it’s yours and if you leave the firm, you take the chair with you.

      For the headset, I’m not sure what you mean or why it would cost hundreds – what I’m picturing is readily available for under $30 at Best Buy. But anyway, if you’re on the phone a lot for work calls, it seems like a reasonable request to have the firm buy it. That said, if you’d be the only one getting a headset and no one else uses one, it may be better to buy it yourself, too.

    • Godzilla

      I think shoes like these can emphasize the girly-ness of an outfit. So if you wore a cardigan/blouse with an a-line skirt, these shoes would contrast with the outfit enough to highlight it. I don’t know how else to explain it. But, it should be done with purpose. So, a colored skirt and patterned top. Not navy/neutrals all up and down, that’d look frumpy/dowdy/matron-ish.

  19. Art

    All, any suggestions of where I might look for a cool, modern large print for my office wall? I tried Etsy (because I don’t like the idea of a framed art poster tooooo much), but I am totally overwhelmed by how many options there are, and there’s no good way I can find to narrow the search.

    Any thoughts would be appreciated!

      • TCFKAG

        Those iPhone skins were AMAZING. I ordered one for myself, in the spirit of buying myself things I need from this mornings discussions. :-)

    • Anon

      try 20x200DOTcom. They have a nice selection of modern art that is reasonably priced.

    • TCFKAG

      Not sure if you’re looking for particular artists — but if you can find a print of appropriate size by Hunderwasser (an artist from Vienna) — I think they are very cool and graphical and modern, while still being work appropriate.

      • Equity's Darling

        The Hundertwasser building is super cool also….you know, in case you were also planning any travels….

        Anyways, back to the topic, I’m partial to hitting up local art student shows, because they’re a) reasonably priced, and b) supporting students, and c) supporting local artists.

    • nona

      Not a modern print, but…. National Geographic has an art store online where you can order any of a large number of their photos, in a variety of mounting options. They’ve also got some of the Hubble telescope pictures, which end up looking pretty abstract to me.

      • Art

        Perfect! Thanks, I’ll look into this. TCFKAG, I checked out Hunderwasser — good suggestion!

    • Homestar

      Readers Digest did an article on 11 websites for affordable art (some already mentioned here). Link to follow.

  20. Anonylawyer

    Love them! But…no platform. Even a 1/2 inch platform would make these doable. I don’t do more than 3 inches with no platform.

  21. MJ

    Help! Need hive mind advice.

    My former boss and former client, B, is trying to poach me to join her at her new company. She invited me for lunch with her at said company last December, and proceeded to introduce me to everyone on her team. It was a stealth ambush interview, but I didn’t really “sit down” and interview–she and I just had lunch.

    She has now gotten to the point that she emails me and calls me multiple times per day because I “haven’t sent her my resume.” I told her flat out, multiple times that while my current job is not 100% perfect, I still have more to learn in the position, the timing is not right and I am not looking to move. I also told her that geographically, it’s the wrong direction. She’s NOT hearing me say no. She’s also contacted other mutual acquaintances that know me and her bosses and had them put a good word in for me. I don’t want to work there! It’d be a step down in responsibility, pay, prestige. The commute would be horrible. I don’t know how much clearer I can be.

    The last email she sent (minutes ago), following a very forceful VM, as I am now screening her calls was, “Is everything ok? Last we had talked you were going to get a resume to me. I figure since you haven’t gotten me a resume that you’re not interested in the position, but I’m worried about you. I’m totally cool with you not wanting to leave [current position], but let me know what’s going on because I value your friendship.”

    She is laying it on ridiculously thick, and the hard sell is extremely offputting! Maybe I’m being rude by going radio silent, but every time I tell her no, I get another earful on how I need to join.

    How much more do I need to say, short of “Heck no I don’t want to work there” should I say? Help!!! Need advice on the “Thank you so much for thinking of me, but it’s just not the right opportunity” email or telephone conversation.

    This lady is killing me, and I _do_ value her friendship, but it’s like she’s already decided that I HAVE to go work there, and I don’t. I won’t.

    • TCFKAG

      I might go with something more forceful than “Thank you for thinking of me” like “I’m sorry if there has been any miscommunication, but I am committed to my current position. I’m not currently looking to make a move. Of course, if I hear of anyone looking for a job, I’ll pass their information along.”

      Something like that.

      The fact that she’s contacted you EVERY DAY about this is INSANE. woah.

    • karenpadi

      She is being so unprofessional. When this happened to me, I kept trying to be polite. Big mistake. Finally I just said, “I don’t want to make a move. My current firm really values me and that my leaving would be disloyal. The moment [my boss] turns evil, you will be the first person I call.”

  22. Bonnie

    Not sure if it’s too late in the thread to get a response but fingers crossed. Any recommendations for privacy screens for a flat screen monitor? I changed offices and now everyone can see my computer screen when they walk by my office.

    • AIMS

      Don’t have a specific rec., but when I was considering getting one I found Amazon to have a lot of options, with helpful reviews.

  23. anon

    I need to buy some garment bags for my suits. Does anyone have one that they can recommend? I have done some of my own research but I havent found anything yet that I really like…

  24. fashion emergency

    If you had time to go to only one store to buy a suit, had a fairly limited budget (but not so limited you had to buy it at Target or H&M), where would you go? Tall, long torso/ short legs, for shape 36/26/37, shoulders broad in proportion to waist. Due to some body changes my current wardrobe doesn’t fit and I have a suit-wearing occasion in the next few days! (The threat about what stores work for what body types wasn’t that helpful.) Anyone similarly shaped who has suits they love, let me know where they’re from!

    • Gooseberry

      In this type of emergency, I’d suggest a dept store (and then you can pick depending on your price comfort Macys, Bloomies, Nordstrom, higher, lower, etc.). I say this because you say you only want to go to one store. My body shape sounds like yours, and Ann Taylor fits me and might be in your price range, but then you are stuck there with the 3-4 options they have, only a smaller set of which may suit whatever occasion it is, and you have to hope that you like it, and they have your size. At least at a department store, you can choose from a greater variety.

      Or, can you borrow to get through this date and then give yourself more time to find a suit that fits well and that you like?

      Good luck!

      • ESquared

        I 2nd Macy’s– unfortunately, you usually have to buy the jacket & skirt together (which is not optimal for me because I am WAY different sizes on top & on bottom)– but I found that buying 2 sets was still cheaper than Loft– which is where I bought ALL of my suits in law school because I mistakenly thought it was the cheaper option!

    • Maddie Ross

      Speaking of, does anyone know if there are any Talbots coupon codes out there like the 40% off one last month? I kinda want to buy another suit, but only if on super sale…

      • ESquared

        I used to be on their mailing list & they basically had weekly 40% off ones. It got to the point that there were SO many I took myself off the list.

    • mamabear

      I’d go to a large Macy’s and browse the Jones NY. It may not be the most exciting suit you’ve ever owned, but you will certainly be able to find something appropriate.

      And how I know this is, this is exactly the situation I was in two weeks ago!

    • Lynnet

      I agree that a department store would be best if you’re in a place with good department stores, but in my hometown the suit selection at Macy’s was worse than the suit selection at goodwill. I’d try The Limited for the broadest selection for a good price.

      • fashion emergency

        Thanks everyone. I haven’t previously had luck at Macy’s, but am a different shape now, so maybe!

  25. Bo-non

    Can we revisit the Botox comments from yesterday? One commenter equated it to bikini waxes. Is it really that common? For those of you who have looked into the risks/rewards/research, and decided to do it, what pushed you over the edge? Also, I live in a large (but not NYC) east coast city — how much should I expect to pay?

    • So Cal

      You pay by the syringe. I have my crows feet and forehead done, and that is two syringes of Dysport, which is $475. More often than not, there is an online promotion through Dysport for $50 off.

      What pushed me over the edge? Not sure. Had been thinking about it for a while. Was 40. Had been scrupulous about skincare and sun avoidance for decades. But didn’t like my crows feet. This seemed more certain than department store creams and their empty promises in that there was no question but that it would work, so the extra money seemed worth it. Also, because I researched which MD to use, I was certain it would be safe for me. (I can’t imagine going to one of those mall salons for Botox.)

  26. SF Bay Associate

    PSA money saving tip – I didn’t know that you could purchase your own modem for use with Comcast internet, and stop getting charged $7/month to rent a modem from Comcast. This may be really obvious to everyone but me. Given that modems are <$50 from BestBuy or Amazon, the thing pays for itself after a while. I wish I knew about this a couple years ago.

    • Cat

      Follow-up PSA- it may take a few months for Comcast to register your self owned modem. Just did this in November and have had to call twice (and specifically request that they also remove the tax that was charged on the rented modem as well as the errant modem fee itself). But to second SF Bay, do it – the whole practice reminds me of reading about little old ladies that have been renting their phone for the past 50 years…

      • P

        PSA follow up to the PSA – even when you buy your modem through them, they might try to charge you for it EVEN THOUGH it’s on your previous bill that you bought the modem (they did to me) so watch out!

    • kmm

      I don’t know why more people don’t do this! The paralegal in my office has spent literally hundreds of dollars renting a modem from Comcast. I’m on my second modem in 7 years, spent <$50 on both of them.

  27. mamabear

    to TCFKAG

    I saw this morning’s thread by you and have the following suggestion

    1) keep a list of your basics that need replacing
    2) budget a reasonable (not miserly) monthly amount toward basics so that you don’t feel guilty
    3) allocate one Saturday morning per month to hit downtown or the mall and spend the budget. Spend the entire amount.
    4) stick to the items on the list, but also use the occasion to discover future if/when splurge items
    5) then buy yourself lunch and a nice glass of wine & read a magazine or book

    Consider this treating yourself well. You work hard and you deserve it.

    • TCFKAG

      Thanks mamabear, I think that’s a really good structure. Plus….I like all excuses for wine and magazines!

  28. Science Geek Fashionista

    I just found Black Milk leggings and clothes, and I am fascinated! Anyone else going for the galaxy, skeleton, muscle or science-ish statement for fun on the weekend?

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