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Coffee Break: Portable Mini Humidifier

Readers, do you have a portable humidifier that you love? I'm on the hunt for one for travel, and the old reader favorite is sold out. This one from Amazon seller MOVTIP comes really highly rated, and I like the kind of sleek look of it, as well as all of the colorways. This one is USB powered, though, so keep that in mind!

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These are some of the Corporette readers' favorite items for business travel…

collage of 18 different things readers love for when they travel on business trips
Reader favorites for business travel: 1) rolling bag (Travel Pro is a favorite!) 2) travel adapter 3) a wall tap 4) laptop privacy screens 5) travel wraps like this 6) Bluetooth keyboard (great for using with an iPad or iPhone), 7) packing cubes (pictured), 8) Kindle! 9) eye mask (pictured) 10) disposable toothbrushes – great for when you land (pictured) 11) ginger tablets for motion sickness, 12) noise-cancelling headphones, 13) ear plugs 14) Hanging makeup bag and/or Dopp kit (pictured), 15) reusable water bottle (pictured), 16) mini sauces and dressings (pictured) 17) portable humidifier (pictured) 18) facial mister (pictured)

Sales of note for 12.13

  • Nordstrom – Beauty deals on skincare including Charlotte Tilbury, Living Proof, Dyson, Shark Pro, and gift sets!
  • Ann Taylor – 50% off everything, including new arrivals (order via standard shipping for 12/23 expected delivery)
  • Banana Republic Factory – 50-70% off everything + extra 20% off
  • Eloquii – 400+ styles starting at $19
  • J.Crew – Up to 60% off almost everything + free shipping (12/13 only)
  • J.Crew Factory – 50% off everything and free shipping, no minimum
  • Macy's – $30 off every $150 beauty purchase on top brands
  • Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off, plus free shipping on everything (and 20% off your first order)
  • Talbots – 50% off entire purchase, and free shipping on $99+

137 Comments

  1. My college aged son came home for Mother’s Day this weekend. He lives in a tiny apartment style dorm with five roommates, three to a bedroom, he calls “the guys.” They’re all freshman.

    At the beginning of the year all the guys had meal plans and would walk to the dining halls, but my son has always been interested in cooking so he has been making some pretty nice meals in the tiny (and I mean tiny) kitchen of their dorm room. He takes the city bus to the grocery store and stocks up weekly. It really has saved us a lot of money, and it has given my son and I something to text about. I’m the cook in the family, so he’s always asking how to make this or that. He’s made a lot of roast chickens, which is kind of one of my specialties.

    This weekend he told me The Guys have all dropped their meal plans and are cooking for themselves. He said, “I hope you don’t mind, Mom, but they’re all making your roast chicken now.” In fact, several of The Guys went home and made roast chickens for their moms for Mother’s Day.

    I don’t think my son really grasps how very much this made my day!

    (In case anyone is interested, “my” roast chicken is basically Molly Stevens’, the key to which is pre-salting.)

    4. Omg I LOVE that! High five to you for teaching six college-age guys to cook!

    5. Love this! When I picked up my son at the end of his first year of college, I found the few plates he took with him still packed from when he moved in. He and his roommateshave kitchen access but had a microwave, and I knew he at least made a lot of PB sandwiches, so I asked how he made sandwiches without plates. He said, “Oh, on a paper towel. Or just, you know, my pant leg.”

    7. wow, what an awesome story! Also great for future partners that “the guys” can feed themselves and perhaps their own family one day!

    9. That’s amazing! I also feel like men these days are a little more independent and capable rather than needing a woman to cook and clean etc. When I was in my 20’s my then bf who was in his 30’s thought cooking meant heating up a frozen bagged meal where you just add water!! Love a man who can actually cook!!

    1. They usually have sales at Memorial Day, Labor Day, etc., but it’s only 10 or 15% off. They also have end of season closeout sales where some things might be a little more discounted (I’ve gotten some decent deals on jackets), but I don’t think they ever have big sales on everything. If there’s something you really want, you could wait until Memorial Day, but otherwise you’re better off just buying it before it goes out of stock in the size or color you want.

  3. A few red flags on the post above – brand name I’ve never heard of, brand name is a random amalgamation of syllables in all caps, number of positive reviews is a really surprisingly large number (here 21,000+) and the photos are clearly photoshopped stock photos. Doesn’t bode well for product quality or safety, or compliance with supply chain ethics.

    1. I just realized I might be on the crazier side of plant lady when my first thought when I saw the post was that it might be a good option for in one of my big plants that wants more humidity. I didn’t realize portable humidifiers were a thing.

      When I clicked over, these ceramic ones where a similar option that intrigues me even more….I like that they are more natural/no electricity whatsoever.
      https://www.amazon.com/Humidifiers-Decorative-Humidifier-Non-Electric-Bluestone/dp/B01C4KFDLO/ref=pd_day0fbt_sccl_1/147-6162763-9970450?pd_rd_w=ulK0J&pf_rd_p=bcb8482a-3db5-4b0b-9f15-b86e24acdb00&pf_rd_r=GW9F9YQHZYH87A182SCE&pd_rd_r=43728567-2ca7-440e-a7de-fb5460c4277c&pd_rd_wg=FYbYf&pd_rd_i=B01C4KFDLO&psc=1#customerReviews

    3. Yeah, I have an Amazon rule where I don’t buy from sellers who have their name in all-caps. I’ve seen so many of them selling the exact same product under different names.

  4. Is anyone here a regular Kohl’s shopper? I never shop there but my husband bought an appliance there and we now have $50 “kohls bucks” or whatever they call it, it seems real and he wants me to spend it. It excludes makeup, which would be the easiest thing. I was thinking of towels or something like that. Are any of their brands good for this? I’m open to either bath or kitchen towels.

      1. They have a lot of designer diffusion brands and I have had a lot of fun with those. Also, sneakers.

      2. I like Vera Wang’s pajamas at Kohls. I also bought some dish/bar towels from them and they’re good.

    2. I bought a nice Ugg comforter from Kohls. And they carry other name brands too. I don’ t know of any Kohl’s specific brands, but their kitchen stuff is fine. I would say on par with Target.

    4. Does Lauren Conrad still have a line of clothes there? It was a decade ago now but her maternity stuff was really cute and well made! I’ve also used my ‘Kohls cash’ to stock up on lego sets/bubbles/art sets for child birthday parties when my kid was smaller and we had what seemed like a party every other weekend.

      1. You could probably find the toys cheaper elsewhere, but Kohl’s has lots of kids clothes. Pieces go on clearance for like $5-$10.
        Towels, sheets and bathmats are decent quality. Pillows too. They also carry Fiestaware but check if it’s excluded.

    5. I have some Vera Wang towels that I really like, they are still nice and fluffy ~ seven years after I bought them. I’ve also used Kohl’s cash on basics that I always need, like tights and socks.

    6. I love their bath mats. I go there just for them. Sonoma Goods For Life ultimate bath mats. Fluffy. Washable. Colorfast. Fast-drying. Non-slip. Non-moldy.

      1. OK thank you! I love a very specific recommendation. I’ve been buying my bath mats from your employer and the rubber backing does not stay put. They get downgraded to dog mats and now he has too many because it happens so fast.

        1. Oh yeah, I haven’t found a single bath mat I liked off of Amazon. Similar utter frustration. I was also surprisingly disappointed by what I found at Target. Kohl’s definitely wins.

    7. Kohl’s is where I bought my Nutribullet blender, which I adore, on sale for about $50.

    8. It’s legit. And unlike some other stores you don’t have to spend $100 to get the $50. You can literally spend 50.01 and owe a penny.
      They have good basics. Name brand sneakers. There’s a chaps and Vera wang line that are good. Bras are department store brands.

      1. It’s legit but buyer beware – using Kohl’s cash affects how a potential return is handled. You’ve spent $X to get $Y Kohl’s cash. If you spend your Kohl’s cash and then decide to return all or part of your original purchase of $X, the Kohl’s cash will be deducted from that return amount. If you’re not looking to return the original purchase, you’re golden.

        I worked at Kohl’s when that policy rolled out and BOY was it fun to explain.

        1. I am not sure I understand the problem. Do you mean it’s not possible to turn Kohl’s cash into actual cash through buy-and-return, or some other issue?

          1. I’m OP Sounds like if my husband returns the thing he bought, and I’ve already spent the Kohls cash on something else, he doesn’t get all of his money back, he gets original purchase price minus the kohl’s cash. Is that also true if we never spend the kohl’s cash?

            It’s kind of tricky because it’s a little less generous than a straight discount like 20% off.

            He bought a thing that cost $250 and got $50 Kohl’s cash. In this example it feels like he got 20% off. But if he returns the thing, he only gets a $200 refund.

          2. OP, if you never spend the kohl’s cash it does not affect the ultimate return price.
            Anoshmanon, you’d think it was pretty straightforward but it was earth shattering for some folks.

  5. I have a situation with my friend group that is really irritating me, and I either need to get over myself and chalk it up to a stage-in-life thing or gently call them on their BS. There are four of us in said group. Between the four of us, we have kids ranging in age from 6 to 16. Several are in the same grades. A lot of these kids are pretty heavily involved in sports and extracurriculars. Mine are, too, but not at the same level.

    The problem is trying to schedule ANYTHING. A girls’ night out, let alone a girls’ trip. There is always a kid thing that interferes. And I understand it on some level, because I prioritize my kids’ stuff, too! But it sometimes verges on the ridiculous. Like you can’t skip a single softball game when your daughter has a tournament every weekend and will play 50 games this season? And it’s cool that all four of your kids are in summer swim league, and of course we get that you don’t want to miss their weekend meets, but you can’t miss ONE MEET for a girls’ trip? Because your kids’ swim schedule eliminates 9 out of the 11 weeks of summer break.

    The kicker was back in early April, we were trying to find a short trip that we could go on together for 2-3 days. This was after plans for a longer road trip fell through because of the aforementioned swim schedule. We’d floated the idea of doing something the week of Memorial Day, and several of the women wanted to run those dates by their husbands. Fine. But nothing had happened for nearly a month, and one of the women was complaining that her husband was going to be out of town part of that time, so I figured any trip plans were off. I didn’t reach out because I’m tired of being the organizer. Friend texted us all last week: Hey, guess what! DH’s work trip is canceled! We can travel during the week of Memorial Day after all!

    Uhhh, what? After sitting on that for a bit and with nobody else responding, I texted back and said when it looked like plans weren’t coming together, DH and I started making plans to do our family vacation that week. Crickets. Then several hours later: Well, maybe we can all pick just a day to get together and go to a winery and get pedicures. YES, SURE. Sounds fun. But don’t act like I canceled the girl trip by taking a family vacation.

    The kicker is that our husbands get together fairly regularly for a drink or whatever. Why it’s so hard to plan something just for us, I do not understand. Their husbands are very willing and able to step in. The real answer, I think, is that they like being Supermom and fully in charge of their families. And I find it immensely irritating that family life can’t be set aside for 48 hours, especially at this stage in life when the kids are older, also capable human beings, and don’t need Mom standing over their shoulder at all times.

    Is this just how life is when you have more kids in middle school/high school? Because the idea of it becoming easier for moms to hang out when the kids get older is really not panning out.

    1. I’d say only 30-40% of my female friends are parents, but I’m sort of at the “I’m willing to host on Saturday the 15th,w ho can make it then?” stage, and am fully fine with only half of people showing up. For a trip out of town or to an airbnb, I try to loosely get some buy in and book a house. I say we’re booked this weekend, let meknow by next month if you’re in, and move down the list of friends if people don’t sign up.

      It’s definitely frustrating, though.

      1. +1. It’s never going to be the case that everyone is truly free. If you’re asking people what date they prefer, of course they’re going to try to work around other commitments such as kids’ sports schedules. If you just say, let’s do X on Y date, then they are actually put to that choice of what to prioritize. It’s a slight nuance but it’s the difference between intentionally scheduling something that conflicts with the sports game, versus, my friends are doing something that conflicts with the sports game that I actually want to join in on, so I’ll prioritize the friends over the game this time.

    2. Oh, also, maybe try a more impromptu thing? Like, hey, noticed a new restaurant with a cool patio, I’m planning to head there around six to celebrate my promotion! Can anyone join me?

    3. I suspect it’s less about swim meets and more just that they don’t really want to do girls trips and kid stuff is a good excuse. None of my close girlfriends have wanted to travel since having their first babies (5 years ago now). I don’t think it’s really about not being able to leave their babies (they all work and most travel for work) but more just that they don’t really want to spend the time or money on a girls trip and the kids are an easy out. Sorry, it sucks. I’m jealous of women who have friends to travel with.

      1. Yep, this. Especially for friends of mine with kids on the younger side of that range (6, for instance), they’re just exhausted. Planning a trip is just too much for them at this stage. Not saying I agree with it, but it’s pretty common.

        1. I don’t think it really matters whether you “agree” with another family’s personal choice about how they spend their time. There’s no right or wrong way to do it.

          1. I think sometimes they de-prioritize friendships to the point where they will not have any when the kids head off to college. Just specifically – I’ve had two good friends who’ve so thoroughly retreated into their family since having kids that I genuinely don’t think they have done anything outside of their family in 3-4 years (pre-COVID). I disagree with that. Otherwise, I get it – they’re TIRED and are not always in the same financial/health/family position.

          2. All of this talk here over the last two years about just doing whatever one can do get through this pandemic and you’re going to criticize the choices of an entirely different family from your own? It’s not your place, you don’t get to “disagree” with it, at least not without sounding like a judgmental wacko.

          3. Depriorotizing friendships is a mistake. My good friend’s mom prioritized her husband and kids for 20 years while losing touch with all her high school/college friends and never making any outside-of-work work friends, then her husband passed away in their 50s and her entire social and support system consisted of a sibling who lives on another continent and her 2 kids. It has been seriously hard for my friend to be the person her mom relies on for every kind of interaction and support.

          4. The poster indicated that she did not think her feelings matter here and she just accepted the facts. She is allowed to have feelings or make judgments about others. You clearly do.

          1. I’m saying this gently, but I think what they’re really saying is they don’t want to go on this trip. I’d try for smaller things – dinners, etc. Even if it’s “hey, scored this awesome reservation (pick a place nice enough it’s a win to get a reservation, but not so nice that you’ll get charged for dropping the number down) at this place we talked about on date at time, let me know if you can make it – happy to adjust the number depending on who can come!”

      2. This. I hate girls trips. I sucked it up for bachelorette trips but I’m done. I inevitably want to stay in a nicer hotel/go somewhere someone else hates/drink less/go to bed earlier than the group. I might feel differently if someone proposed something all inclusive within driving distance but I realize that’s a unicorn situation. I will meet you for local dinner/drinks/brunch/movie/pedicures! I’ll host you at my house even! But I’m particular about travel and group trips are my own personal hell.

        1. Do you participate in text banter with close friends suggesting you are interested? OP’s friends do.

          1. Not Anne-On, but one of my friends who clearly doesn’t really like girls trips happily participates in text and email threads about planning. She’s a people pleaser who has a hard time saying no to people, so she acts enthusiastic and then usually comes up with an excuse (kids, work, husband, etc) when things progress to the booking stage. In fact, the most recent time I actually booked a trip with her, she begged off at the last minute, leaving me on a trip with two of her other friends I’m friendly with but not super close to, so now I won’t plan a trip with her again. I love her like a sister, truly, but this aspect of her personality really drives me crazy because I prefer people who are direct. Not liking girls trips is fine! Not everyone likes the same things. But then you should be upfront with your friends that you’re not interested instead of stringing them along and making excuses at the end. But it is 100% a thing people do.

      3. I also think it’s this.
        I’ve posted about this before, but I am on the whole “if they want to, they will” tip when it comes to many things in life, including what goes on with my friends. I planned a friend trip for June with some friends from high school and got the whole thing confirmed and the trip paid for by everyone within a few days earlier in the spring. Meanwhile some of my local friends can’t seem to get a free spot in their schedule to go to drinks between now and December. They aren’t that busy; they just don’t want to. If they wanted to, they would. So my new thing is, I am going to make plans/do stuff with the people that indicate not just with words, but with actions that they want to participate in things. Like OP, I am tired of always being the planner/organizer and think taking on that role has allowed several people to continue halfheartedly participating when they really don’t care/don’t want to. If people want to get together, more than one person can take the initiative to put the planning in motion and then everyone involved can mobilize themselves to commit. If they want to, they will.

      4. 100% would find any excuse not to go on a girls trip. I hate leaving my kids. It’s not something I would ever do. No desire. I find it kind of strange that mothers of small children would even propose that.

    4. “I find it immensely irritating that family life can’t be set aside for 48 hours”

      Uh, no, this is not your call to make. I think you’re being unreasonable and you don’t get to decide what is a skippable activity for another family. Sounds like the men have it easier because they’re not trying to plan entire trips.

      1. This. I also think it’s unreasonable to be miffed that the swim meet or baseball game they miss is going to be spent on a girls trip. When my stepson was in middle school and it’s constant activities, those weekends he didn’t have a game were so precious. Having a friend try to plan over it with a girls trip would have been unreasonable at that time, when I could hardly get a weekend for our own vacations or activities as a family. For what it’s worth, the time did go by quickly. By high school, most kids are focused on fewer sports as cuts by skill come into play more heavily and their own interests start to narrow. I think you are aiming too high. Instead of trips or even all-day activities, plan the occasional dinner (or even post-dinner dessert and cocktails) and don’t assume everyone will be able to make it every time. There is a season for all things, and this one ends faster than you realize. Now I would give anything to be sitting there watching one of those games.But the upside is a lot more time with my friends again. I think what helped was that we still did things, even if it was only once in a blue moon for awhile there. Don’t give up if the relationships matter. But also get rid of the resentment. They’re not trying to be Supermoms. They’re trying to enjoy their kids while they can and they don’t need to be guilted for doing that.

    5. Well, maybe these moms enjoy the experience of being a sports parent more than they enjoy doing “girls'” things with this friend group.

      My husband and I were heavily-involved sports parents and between us never missed a game or tournament. As the kids got older other parents made different choices and sometimes we were the only parents along on trips. We didn’t criticize other parents for not attending but we enjoyed doing so. We are not sports experts but loved organizing, watching, cheering and managing and somebody had to do it. We planned family and personal travel around the schedule. We had one friend who criticized us for this choice but it was our choice to make. I would never have missed a game or a tournament for a girls’ night. I just enjoyed watching the kids more than doing those kind of things.

      Now that ours are aged out of sports and grown I don’t regret a single second of any of it. Looking back, it was over in the blink of an eye. There’s a poignant essay written by a hockey mom about attending her son’s last game and suddenly realizing all she would miss about the grind of being a sports parent. It rang true for me.

      It appears that your friends are making THEIR choices. Gently, I don’t think it is fair for you to say those choices are “BS”. If you want to make different choices you will need to accept that you will have to attend events you want to with the friends who are available or with other friends.

      1. I could not agree more. In 2020, as I took my son to his last Scouting event, not knowing a pandemic was lurking and that would be “the last of it”..followed by virtual events for all his “last of” Senior year in high schoolI wish I would have leaned in even more and not wasted away a “is this over yet” snarky conversation with other Moms in the back. Because, guess what it was. So perhaps these other parents are enjoying these moments even more than they had before. Let us give each other grace for our choices, and let us be there on the other side when these fleeting moments are over and we have time again for girls adventures. I am so grateful for my friends at different stages of life who are still around now that I have more free time and less child scheduled activities. We have those trips, those sangria afternoons, those pedicures, all the sweeter for what we have been thru together.

      1. +1. Why does it have to be a weekend trip? Why can’t you just say ‘hey, I’m hosting a backyard bbq on date X, kids are welcome, come over and we’ll catch up!’ or ‘who’s free for drinks on date Y at place Z, lmk who’s free to join!’.

        1. Yep, this. We travel with one other couple who have kids the same age, similar travel goals, etc That’s it. Adding even one more would be immeasurably complicated. Oh, did I mention I’ve been friends with one half of the couple since we were in high school? Maybe once the kids get older we’ll expand it – but by older, I mean college.

      2. OP did stop trying. Then her friend popped up and tried to revive the trip (which was a revival of a first trip they all planned together that fell through) and made OP feel guilty for having made other plans altogether.

    7. So.. my kids are older, but my daughter was in a competitive sport and my friends during that period just became the other parents of kids on the same team. She did both varsity high school and a club travel team. I did notice in many cases that it was only the mom who was ever there. My husband and I either traded off or went together – typically he did weekday stuff and I did weekend stuff because I had the more travel-heavy job. But there were plenty of moms I would have thought were single moms. I never did meet one particular girl’s dad and it surprised me to find out that her parents were still married to each other!

      I know you (sort of uncharitably, but I get that you’re annoyed) think the dads would happily pick up kid duties to give the mom a chance to have a break, but there’s lip service and then there’s actually doing the thing, and I found in these circles the dads just never did the thing even though they all said they were willing to, and it wasn’t all the moms saying never mind, I’ll do it.

      Lower your expectations a bit, don’t assume you know what is going on in someone else’s relationship, and be OK with making looser plans. This too shall pass, at some point you’ll all be empty nesters and have more time for get-togethers.

      For what it’s worth, I’ve always had a hard time scheduling get-togethers with my entire friend circle as well, and I’m the only mom. EVERYONE is busy, whether it’s with kid stuff or not. Sometimes you have to be OK with not everyone being able to attend. Perfect is the enemy of good enough.

    8. When I read your post my first impression was – they’d be ok hanging out locally for a few hours but not going away for days. That’s why the DHs get together somewhat regularly for drinks but the wives can’t manage to get together – because they’re trying to plan too big. I mean I sort of get it. I’m at an age now where travel is annoying unless it’s someplace I REALLY want to go. Logistics, laundry, and packing and traveling to go sit in an AirBnb drinking and going to a few dinners just doesn’t do it for me when we could just dine locally. To be fair you don’t say what these girls trips are but that’s usually what they are – I doubt you’re jetting off to Paris.

      1. This right here.

        Signed,
        Scouter mom who has camped 20+ days since the pandemic b/c other moms can’t seem to do the camping thing; no way I am taking another trip; happiness is my own d*mn bed

    9. I am married with no kids and my best friends have kids and live in other states. We can usually find time for small trips but I always suggest places where I would want to go anyways and would enjoy even if they don’t show up. I get my own place to stay and let them know where it is in case they want to find a place close by. They will try their hardest to make it but I know they can’t help it if their kid get sick or something else that is higher priority shows up in their life. I plan to have a fun time no matter what.

      I would be annoyed too if I was in your place mostly because I hate it when people don’t want to help solve the problem. They should say that you can’t go or don’t want to go so that at least the others can make plans.

        1. OP here. Then why do they keep saying they want to go places and do things together?! Start text threads about it? It makes no sense to do all that if you’re not into the idea.

          1. Ohhh that’s a bit different then. I think people missed/didn’t realize this from your original post.

          2. Because they like the idea of it. Because it’s a way of expressing that they love and value their friendships. People do not always say exactly what they mean.

          4. I feel like most of the commenters are ignoring the words in your post and projecting their own feelings onto your situation. I would be annoyed, too, if they are indicating interest but also making it very low priority at the same time.

          5. I think a lot of people like the idea of a girls trip in theory but in practice don’t want to actually do it.

        2. I understand it is not their problem but I see it as the busy ones kinda stringing the OP along because they aren’t saying they are unable able to go or don’t want to go. Their continued participation in the coordination process seems to imply they can go. I think it is fine to prioritize whatever one chooses to in their life, it would just be helpful to clearly communicate it to others who are impacted by your choice.

          1. I agree with anonymous at 524. It IS annoying but clearly we live in a society where people (not just women, not just Moms, but that is the example here and why everyone is so defensive) think they get to get away being rude and flak-y.

          2. If OP gives off even a whiff of the attitude she has here to her friends I’m not surprised. Why would they want to spend time with somebody who thinks all of their life choices are wrong?

    10. Honestly, I have always found it difficult to coordinate multiple schedules, kids or not. For girls night out, I would pick a date, and whoever can make it, makes it. Don’t sweat it if it is not all four of you every time.

      Girls trips are a bit more complicated… I have to admit that they are not a high priority for me at this point of my life, and that just might be the case with your friends too. You said the husbands are just meeting for a drink. That is much different than an entire weekend!

      1. The trip was one example, but it’s really become everything. Wasn’t always the case.

    11. I mean I’m 42 and single and I wouldn’t want to do girls trips so it doesn’t shock me that some people with kids don’t. IDK why but when I travel I 100% want it to be how I want, which it isn’t with groups of people. Me having to wake up early because everyone wants to hike or go to breakfast or having to play games or whatever seems like work to me. And while I don’t have kids I love sports so no way would I miss out on a 16 yr old’s games — I mean I feel like high school sports when varsity teams are good are the reward for having to sit thru practice at age 4 when it takes 15 min to get one hit.

    12. Why are you stuck on a multi-day weekend trip? It sounds like the husbands get together regularly because a 1.5 hour happy hour after work is tremendously easier to put together/agree to than a multi-day trip. Maybe the women just don’t want to go. I think you are wasting your own ire at a non-problem – you still get to see them, just not on your terms.

      1. The OP made clear in her post that the multi-day trip was a group idea, her friend is the one who revived it when OP had dropped it, and this problem exists even when they attempt one-night events.

    13. Some people are big on girls’ trips, some are not. You can’t change them. I get that the fake interest in the trip is the real annoying part—don’t pretend you may want to do it and flake out, just say no from the start.
      I am not a girls’ trip person, but would love brunch/lunch/dinner. The guys are getting together for a few hours, which is not an equivalent ask. Try that.
      And yes, scheduling things (even brunch) is immensely annoying. I get it. But it’s an easier ask than a weekend and perhaps you’d get a more positive response.

    14. Ha. I have a friend who can’t even get together for dinners or a brunch on the weekend, even when planned a month in advance, because of her kids’ activities. And her husband NEVER seems to be able to take over – he has an activity on the weekends that is apparently sacred.

      I try not to say too much because I don’t know what sort of arrangement they have in their marriage, but she works full time, too, and seems to be the one in charge of all kid things AND all household things, including the yards. He had a meltdown over being asked to let in the housecleaner and the guy who was delivering an appliance on the same day (I’m pretty sure he is working from home full time or nearly full time and I’m pretty sure his job is not one with wall to wall meetings all day).

      I don’t think I like this husband very much.

    15. You don’t say how many are in the group – if it’s only 3-4 that’s different. But if it’s 6 or more, how about proposing 3 separate dates and if you get enough commitment, book that one? Like “Would like to plan a trip to X local sometime soon. Do any of these weekends work for you? Weekend A, Weekend B and Weekend C. Then book the one that gets the most “likes” and tell the others “next time we hope it works for you too.” This shouldn’t lead to hard feelings for those left out and they can always plan one that works for them the next time.

      I’m another whose kids are grown, but I didn’t miss any varsity games (was team mom for 2 years) and for the travel team, I went to 90% of them. Was also team mom for the travel team for a couple years. DH was coaching other kid’s team and a third team, so if it was double-booked, he obvs went to the one he coached and I would go on the other. I don’t think I missed more than two weekend games where I wasn’t at the other kid’s game – once for a bat mitvah and once for a funeral. There weren’t many girls getaways during this time but I also did go to some family trips, which were planned around tournaments and sometimes the kid missed a travel game. It was a short period of time, as someone said. I do miss it now that they’re grown and I got some lifetime friendships out of some of the teams. And, honestly, the travel team used up some of the discretionary travel budget so it’s good that I enjoyed going to new hotels with nice pools and hot tubs, some of which were in nice places, others not so nice.

    16. I understand how this would be really annoying, especially when people say they want to come or actively participate in planning and then decide they don’t want to or can’t do it after all. It’s also exhausting to be the person who feels like they’re the one always making the effort in the friendship (it sounds like this might be part of your frustration a bit as well).

      I agree with the above that you might get more mileage out of a local, few-hours event. I find trips to be really hard to plan together even for people who want to go and are fully committed, so I hate to say but you might just not have that experience with these people for now.

      1. I think you’re right. It’s disappointing but not as much as fantasizing about things that realistically are not going to happen.

        1. The OP notes being perfectly content with the alternate plan of a one-night event. She asked that her friends not guilt her for having moved on from the idea of a multi-day trip over a holiday weekend and planning a trip with her family for those dates instead. She also noted that planning a one night event also seems impossible because her friends never prioritize it over anything.

      2. This happens in my friend group and it is irritating. But what is truly the most annoying is that the person who brings up getting together most fervently is always the one who’s okay with the dates selected—sometimes ones where the remainder of the group has had to shift our own schedules and prioritize the trip— then ultimately has some conflict and wants to start the planning process all over again. Basically, she wants the entire group to work around her schedule.

        She’s getting left behind this time.

    17. OP – Basic Beeotch Soccer Supermoms are truly boring and obnoxious and self-centered. This post proves it with all the projecting and belittling without even reading your post. You absolutely should be annoyed and disappointed by friends who waste your time and create false expectations and then disrespect you and fail to follow through. Hang out with the husbands.

      1. haha well this post says a lot more about you than it does any of the anonymous posters here. Good luck with your sh1tty attitude about other people.

        1. From skimming your comment I see that you are not a good witness to your own life, your priorities are all askew, and both your family and friends are not that into you. Get over yourself and realize other people don’t actually care about your opinion. In fact, it is my opinion that you don’t get to have one.

          See how that works?

      2. +1 million

        In my old age (41), I don’t bother with these types anymore. Making plans should not be that hard. It’s utterly tiresome to listen to women whine about how they can’t get out.

    18. I have to say, reading your replies to other people, including random aggressive replies from Anonymous (is that also you?), you’re a little offputting. I think you don’t actually like these girlfriends, and you are judgmental of their priorities, and you should stop trying to plan a trip. They don’t want to go, or they don’t want to go with you, but either way, you’re wasting your time. Let someone else plan it and see if it happens, but don’t count on it.

      1. I am the aggressive Anonymous and not the OP. The initial post reflects that OP let it go when it fell through, so much that she planned over it. She said she doesn’t want to feel guilted about not championing the trip anymore. Did you read the post?

        I think it is fair for OP to feel disappointed that her friend posse let their lives shrink down to their households, though, and to come here for a temperature check among other soccer moms, in the nature of many posts on this board.
        Based on the unkind, catty, dismissive, and self-centered reactions she got from said soccer moms here, and the experience she describes with her current friends, I would encourage her to find other friends or, even easier, hang out with her friends’ husbands, who are apparently more social.

        1. Reading this late, a lot of the commenters do seem to have read the OP as an attack on their own choices, instead of a rant about flaky responses, so it did turn to “I love being Supermom” instead of “yeah, that’s so annoying” when reading the comments en masse. Wouldn’t use your descriptions, but a little defensive, yeah.

          It’s turned it to a quite funny “No true Scotsman” session, though: No true Soccer Supermom will ever meet up with friends in sports season! Which is obviously nuts, but the tide of comments dragged it there early, so there we are.

          To OP – in your situation I would to do plan some one-on-one stuff for a while, and not involve the whole group. Make some low level plans on fairly short notice with one person, something you wouldn’t mind doing on your own if it falls through.

  6. Anyone have a clue what this is or suggestions for things to try? Every year during pollen season, I get gassy stomachaches. Right now it’s happening after every meal. It starts in May and subsides in June. The stomachaches can be bad enough to require me to lay down for an hour to three hours. They do not respond to Tums. Pepcid sometimes helps (maybe because it’s an antihistamine as well as an antacid?). I dislike Claritin because it gives me anxiety, but I do think it helps. Who do I ask about this? Are there terms I can Google? I assume it’s worse this year because of the antibiotics I was (am) on during chemo, plus the residual effects of 5 months of constipating meds, but…ugh.

      1. Your timeframe coincides with cherry season (although maybe not where you live?). But could it be a very seasonal produce? Asparagus? Kohlrabi?

      1. Fair. I have an oncologist, integrative care team, and PCP. Where would you start?

          1. Maybe? Mast cell issues can definitely manifest with GI symptoms. But I’ve had bad luck with primary care for GI issues.

          2. (And the immunologist/allergist I happened to see was absolutely fabulous.) I’m not sure what the integrative care team does though.

          3. Yeah, I’ve also had bad luck with primary care for GI, which is why I didn’t immediately leap to going there. Thank you!

    3. That is wild. I am not a doctor, but I know antibiotics mess with my stomach, so maybe focusing on pre and probiotics would help? For me, normally mild allergies can be amplified by background allergens (like during pollen season), so maybe your body is just more easily upset by a generally mild food intolerance?

      1. This, plus do your eating habits change with warmer weather? More local produce (maybe you need to wash it within an inch of its life)? Eating outside (maybe your food is picking up the allergens and your body is not happy)?

        All that said I would bring this to your PCP and maybe alert your integrative team so they can advise on interactions of any further treatment with existing concerns.

          1. Wild story – I am at new job #2! I got randomly headhunted here locally rather than working my remote gig. It felt like a really good fit from the off and the chance to be more connected to the community felt like a godsend, so I saw it through and here I am. My mental outlook is so much better (who knew I was an extrovert) and I started a week ago today. It’s been so good so far! Thank you for asking!!

          2. Wow! So the frustration wasn’t just the normal 6 month frustration — it was a bad match. I’m so glad you’re in a better place now. Congratulations!!

          3. In hindsight, I think it was. But thank you all the same for encouraging me when I needed it!

      2. Ohhhhhh. That makes sense. I have a mild dairy intolerance that hadn’t been bothering me at all. Maybe it’s flaring with the pollen season. I got in with my PCP next week but will try dairy elimination this week. That’s easier for my still-foggy brain to manage than a larger elimination protocol. Thank you (and hope you and baby to be are doing well!)

        2. We can talk off-line of course, but I should mention that the R- chemo drug that we both got for chemo causes dairy intolerance in a good number of people, including me. My son has it and both son and I have celiac, so maybe that’s why. But it lasted for about 15 months after I finished the R because I had maintenance doses after remission.

          1. This was probably unclear. I was never dairy intolerant before and it’s mostly gone now. But I recognized the signs.

          2. Ohhhh how interesting. This is part of why I was wondering if I should talk to the oncology team first, though they sent me to the PCP. Sending you and your family all the best.

          3. Yes, ask. I’m not the only one on the FB groups that it has happened to. And eliminating dairy is *relatively* easy, compared to eliminating all major allergens or doing FODMAP. If it works, it works. If not, back to the drawing board. It was hit and miss with me. Lactaid helped after a bit of time had passed. Thanks for the good wishes.

    4. Have you checked the lists of cross allergy for kind of pollens you react to? It’s normal to have cross allergies.
      Digestive issues is one of the way a cross allergy can manifest.

      I can’t eat apples during birch season, will get a wildly itchy mouth and throat. Some people I know get more serious swelling in the mouth throat.

      Also, different anti-histamines work differently. Talk to your doctor about other versions if Claritin doesn’t work for you, there might be something else more suitable.

      1. I had thought this was my issue in prior years (other triggers related to birch pollen, though not apples!). Since it’s more general this year, I suspect it’s the dairy issue mentioned above. Thank you!

    5. Have you tried Gas-X? I tried it for the first time about a year ago and it’s been a life saver for my IBS related gassy stomachaches. And from what I can tell (and after asking my doctor), it’s a very safe chemical to take long term.

      1. Do you feel like you need to take Gas-X in advance, or does it work for you if you’ve already gotten to the gassy stomach ache stage?

      2. I haven’t and will get some. Though if dinner is any indication, I’ve just developed full-blown lactose intolerance, and removing dairy removes the stomach aches (phew!)

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