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Updated: Nov 1, 2018 175 Comments · by

Coffee Break: Etsa Long Double Breasted Coat

Coffee Break

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Apiece Apart Etsa Long Double Breasted CoatI seriously think this is going to be the winter of the coat! I like this mint-green wool number from Steven Alan — it's so unusual to see such a light color, and it's really fresh and fun. The collarless style is a big one for fall, and I like that this coat is long enough to wear with a dress. It's $595, available in sizes 0-8. Apiece Apart Etsa Long Double Breasted Coat Psst: here's a lower-priced version and a plus-size option in a slightly darker blue.

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Comments

  1. Anon

    1) The winter of the coat? I’m pretty sure coats are popular…every winter.

    2) This looks like my grandmother’s housecoat. Not a fan.

  3. LawyrChk

    In-house and just got a very complimentary thankyou note from an internal client. Should I share with my boss? If so, what do I say so it doesn’t sound like a total brag but does reflect that my clients went out of their way to note I was exceeding expectations?

  4. Diana Barry

    I love this. NMS at all but I can see someone with a cool-toned complexion rocking it.

  5. Miss Behaved

    Everytime I see a coat like this, I wonder how other people can wear it. This coat would look pretty for about 10 minutes and then I’d spill a cup of coffee on it. Same for all the winter white and pale pink coats. Good thing I don’t like pastels anyway…

    • Spirograph

      I have a winter white coat that I love… but after I smudged the arm for the millionth time on the window of the Metro (what is on those that leaves black smudges?!) it was relegated to days that I am not taking public transportation. Or touching anything. Or around my kid. Or going outside in a city.

  6. Kate

    A coat–something you wear over bulky winter garb–that tops out at size 8? Wow.

    • A Nonny Moose

      I think that’s a sizing availability issue– it now maxes out at 6, which makes me think it’s selling out. Which makes sense because it’s gorgeous.

  7. HSAL

    My name is HSAL, and I have a coat problem.

    I love this, but I struggle with similar colors. I have a vintage mint (greener than this) coat that I love, but it never seems winter-appropriate, and it’s too heavy for spring. Maybe I should make more of an effort this season. You know, in addition to my 13 other winter coats. COATS FOREVER.

    • Baconpancakes

      My mind boggles. With jealousy. I know a lot of people have a lot of coats, but with my eeetty beeeettty coat closet and already-stuffed bedroom closet, I have no idea where I would put them. I top out at four, but I’m probably going to eek in another one this winter.

      But if I could, I’d probably get a winter white coat, a wool pumpkin coat, a sleek red quilted puffer coat, a camel cashmere coat, a black waterproof Canada Goose coat, a short zip-in-zip-out-liner North Face, one of those utility jackets everyone and their mother has, a bright yellow raincoat, a black trench, a red trench, a black wool coat, a cloth-of-gold party coat, a navy toggle coat, a Burburry traditional trench, a slate grey barn coat, a navy puffer vest with a fur-trimmed hood, a hunter green knee-length wool coat, a baby blue swing coat, and one of those short stadium jackets by j.crew. Not that I’ve thought about this at all or anything.

      • (former) preg 3L

        Wow… I am so impressed with how much thought you’ve put into this. I’m totally on board with a wool pumpkin coat! That sounds like the perfect fall accessory/necessity!

        • Baconpancakes

          I keep a list of all the clothes I see that I like, and prioritize which things I’m looking to buy this season based on the colors/textures/styles I decide are “Fall 2014” or whatever, and kind of obsessively figure out which brands and styles are the perfect one. I’m actually waffling between the Canada Goose coat and the Patagonia Tres, which is completely absurd, because I don’t have either one of those in my budget.

          • SuziStockbroker

            The Canada Goose coat is worth every penny if you live somewhere cold.
            I bought one in January and wore it every day until April (and there were a couple of days in April I should have worn it). Supposed to be another frigid winter this year.

          • Danielle

            I also drool for the Canada Goose coat. However, I got the TNA Bancroft parka (via Aritzia) last year for Christmas, which I think is a great alternative for under $400.

          • anonymous

            I wanted a Canada Goose but never wanted to spend the money. Finally my partner gave me one as a gift and now if it was ever lost or damaged I would spend the money on a new one in a second. It has made such a difference in my quality of life to be super cozy, warm and comfortable all winter. I actually look forward to the first day it is cold enough to pull it out!

      • HSAL

        I also want the wool pumpkin coat now. So deliciously autumnal. Do you have a link, or is this just something you’ve imagined?

      • ss

        I have an orange coat and it’s amazing how it goes with virtually everything I wear, professional and off-hours.

    • S in Chicago

      I have a pink coat that I feel the same way about. Pastel color in a heavy weight so hasn’t had a ton of rotation. I actually got a little bit more use out of it this past year though by pairing it with a heavy scarf that was primarily burgundy with a small bit of light pink . I also buttoned it lower, showing more of the scarf.

      Perhaps getting a heavy scarf in a dark charcoal, olive, or navy that has a dash of the mint color could do the same for yours?

  8. housecounsel

    I think it’s gorgeous, or it would be until the first post-snowfall day in Chicago when a CTA bus splatters filthy slush all over it.

    I have seen pictures of Angelina Jolie wearing a gorgeous white wool coat in NYC. She’s in NYC. She has six kids. How does she have a white wool coat???

    • Lorelai Gilmore

      Because she has a staff to protect the coat from the kids and the winter? Celebs: They’re Not Just Like Us. (See also Personal Umbrella Handlers)

    • Ellen

      It’s easy. She does NOT have to walk in the slush with a fitbit, like us. She has a gym with a trainer so she never looks sloppy, like us. She does NOT have to work b/c she married Brad Pit, and he has alot of money to spend on her.

      For the rest of us, who have to work for a liveing, this is a fluff item. I need a WARM coat that will not show the dirt in the winter, b/c I have to walk to and from work to keep my TUCHUS in check, and do NOT want to have to freeze my tuchus walking the 40 block’s to work every day and back. The onley break I get is if it is snoweing wet or to icey. I do not like falling in the snow, b/c there is so much dog poop in the winter and I wind up stepping in it. That is how I ruined my FRY boot’s, with the poopie.

      The manageing partner’s brother is at my apartement now cookeing up something for us. He said he had alot of ingredeint’s and invited Harold over, so at least he will not be abel to talk about my tuchus and wieght and compare me to his wife, who was once very pretty. I think their divorce is comeing thru soon, but I have NO interest in him, even tho he alway’s tells me that he is full of penned up energy for sex. The mere thought of him pumping up and down is gross, so I ALWAYS change the subject. YAY!!!

  9. Anon for this

    TJ – I really want to buy a house (when I was a little girl, I used to sketch floorplans instead of flowers or other more “normal” girly things). I am struggling with major house envy with my friends (most of whom had parental help with the DP in our very HCOL area). The amount of $ we need to save for a downpayment just seems so insurmountable that it is hard to stay disciplined and there is zero chance of parental assistance from my side or my husband’s. Any tips for how to (1) stay focused on saving, and/or (2) forget about comparing myself to everyone else?

    • Wildkitten

      Have you gotten financial advice from a professional? I know in my HCOL I will never have a 20% down payment, even though that’s what you’re “supposed” to have.

    • A Nonny Moose

      No ground breaking advice but you do have my sympathy and commiseration.

      Have you set up a separate account for DP saving with auto payroll deduction? That has helped us a lot.

    • OP

      1. Pay yourself first every month, into your downpayment fund, and learn to live on the rest.

      2. Quality > quantity. Go small and small is easy to make perfect (and keep clean and forces you to keep the clutter at bay).

      Think of NYC: your home is not your life and is not who you are. It is where you sleep when you get home from your life, where you meet your friends (they are your friends and love you, not your house or your stuff), and where your stuff is.

      House and stuff =/= happiness. No joy inhibitor is worth what it costs to get.

      • Lorelai Gilmore

        I agree on the small houses. Every extra square foot of space is an extra square foot that has to be furnished, maintained, cleaned, and otherwise managed.

        • Anon

          I think there is a happy medium here. I am a huge advocate for small dwellings, and live in one, but I find it to be more difficult to keep a small house clean. If you go too small, every nook and cranny has something in it/a piece of furniture blocking it. The amount of space that is best certainly depends on number of people, lifestyle, pets, and other things, of course.

    • Lorelai Gilmore

      I just want to empathize. We also live in a very HCOL (SF Bay Area), with no parental assistance, and the down payment just killed me. Ultimately, we only pulled it off because of various job changes that made us some extra money, which just became the house money. We also put down less money than the books recommend – 10%, instead of 20%.

      Can you buy a very small house? A starter house? If you’re into floorplans, are you potentially also into renovations? Maybe if you downscale your ambitions, there’s something out there for you.

      Also, depending on your personal finances, you might want to consider borrowing against your 401k. I know it’s a terrible idea, etc., but it’s a possibility out there.

      Finally, what about moving into a super crappy apartment for a little while and throwing any extra money you save on rent into the down payment fund? If the house really is a priority for you, then I think it’s worth thinking through creative options to finance one. And it might be easier to keep focusing on saving if you’re finding ways to save more each month – there’s something satisfying about watching the numbers go up faster.

      Good luck. It’s really hard to pull this off in these super-HCOLs without start-up cash, parental support, winning the lottery, or serendipity.

        • Anon for this

          Why? I have considered this (as it would nearly eliminate the remaining DP saving issue for me). My big concern is that it may limit my ability to switch jobs. My understanding is that if you borrow from your 401K and you move to a new company that either does not have a 401k plan or has one that does not allow loan transfers, then you run into serious issues (i.e., pay it back in full or take a hit with penalties). I definitely would not want a 401K loan to be a reason I couldn’t switch jobs. If there is a way to deal with that issue (and I am actually having a financial advisor look into this for me), is there a huge reason not to do this? I contribute the max each year, so in theory I’d pay back a $50K loan in 3 years.

          • Anon & In Real Estate

            Lots of hairy technicalities, moving jobs might be one of them but I can’t say either way – if you’re 120% on your financial game, then you could think about it. But, see my post below! There are other, more favorable/less risky alternatives

          • Digby

            Some employers/plans allow terminated employees to keep making loan repayments – instead of making the repayments through payroll deduction as you did as an employee, you make the payments directly to the plan recordkeeper (Fidelity/T. Rowe/whomever). Check your plan’s summary plan description/call your plan’s recordkeeper to see if your plan allows this. Most plans don’t allow employees to transfer in loans from previous employers’ plans – they don’t want the hassle/potential liability if the loan wasn’t issued/maintained in accordance with IRS regs.

    • Anon

      Compare yourself to single people who don’t have a spouse to save with. You will feel rich. :P

      • Also

        +1

        I remember when the great Gunderson wave of raises swept across BigLaw. Real estate prices went up just as fast to soak up all that $ (so singleton lawyer w/ loans was SOL).

      • Solo

        +1. I would LOVE to own a (small) house instead of renting. It will never happen as long as I am single and as long as I have student loans.

        • anon

          This is my life’s struggle. My life goal is to lead a DINK lifestyle.

          How many times can I use the word “life?”

        • Anon for this

          I feel your pain on that one. Spouse and I combined used to be over $3K a month in student loans. We were aggressive for a few years (before we had to start paying for childcare) and now it’s at $1100ish/mo. Still definitely hindering our ability to buy a house but much more managable.

        • Alana

          Also people who are neither highly compensated professionals and public interest employees who are eligible for student loan repayment forgiveness programs.

      • Anon

        +1

        I wish I could tell this to my married friends who constantly complain about how expensive it is to live in our city while they have two incomes compared to my one

        • Carrie

          I hear you…. The first time I walked into my married work colleagues house in SF’s and saw how she lived, I just sighed. They complained, complained that it was small (it was a house!!! in San Francisco!! That was beautiful!!), and I just sighed….

          Living as 2 is so much cheaper than 1.

    • Ginjury

      No advice, just commiseration. We currently have a ~3 year plan (which means waiting much longer than I ‘d like to) and I play with the Bankrate simple savings calculator just about every other day to see how much we’ll have by then. I’m in a HCOL area and really want to save up 20% because the difference you pay over the years is ridiculous and I don’t think I can stomach it.

      Considering that many of the readers here do live in HCOL areas, what percentage did you put down and did you really get a place that was 3x your annual household income, like conventional wisdom suggests?

      • West Coast Lawyer

        In the SF Bay area. We put 0% down, back when you could get away with that (I wouldn’t necessarily recommend that now, but it worked out fine for us) and paid approximately 5x our combined annual gross income. We felt comfortable with this because we had a reasonably good chance of significant income growth over the next 5-10 years (and luckily, neither of us was laid off in the crash, although we did build up a pretty sizable emergency fund when things started tanking just in case).

    • BankrAtty

      I’ve written about his here before, but my spouse and I managed to save $45,000 over two years toward a down payment. Before taxes, we made in the low $90ks–not exactly rolling in it–but lived in a low COLA. We made several decisions during this time that allowed us to save so much: I did not contribute much to retirement savings (~$5k a year to an IRA), I did not put as much toward my student loan payments (although I was paying slightly less than double the minimum payment), and we watched our spending very carefully. This meant eating a lot of lentils, carpooling, drinking cheap wine from trader joes, no cable, no new furniture, and limited clothing purchases. Basically, we committed to saving money and then built our lives around that goal. As a result, we now own a condo in a high COLA, and I’m a really good cook from all of that eating at home. I know the decision not to save aggressively for retirement for two years in one’s mid-20s is controversial. But given that I was not eligible for a 401(k) (I was clerking) and only had so much cash to spread between student loans, the down payment fund, and retirement, something had to give. (My spouse contributed to his 401(k) during this time.)

      • Clementine

        The main way that we saved up our down payment was as follows:

        Went from a household income of $35k to a household income of $85k in year one (graduation related). In year two, grew to a total household income of $140k. We decided to live at the level we could afford when making $50k/year and bank the rest. In year 1, this is how we paid for our wedding. In year 2, we were able to save up a sizeable down payment because we didn’t adjust our spending.

        Just as a note: I still think it’s funny that we can make a great household income, but I will always ask ‘ooo. can I really afford these $10 socks that I really genuinely need?’

    • Anon & In Real Estate

      Keep in mind, banks need to lend money in order to make income on the interest. I’m in an expensive area in the northeast and felt the same way. Given the high cost to enter the housing market (so long as you have good credit, jobs, etc etc) banks are getting creative to help get dollars out the door to borrowers.

      For example, we found a bank that will give us an 80% first mortgage and then layer a second mortgage at a higher rate for another 10%-15%. They blend the rate and payment, and you wouldn’t know the difference – you make one monthly payment that covers both loans. The result is a higher monthly payment since you’re borrowing more, of course, so there are other things you need to consider. But, my point is that banks are aware of the challenges in certain markets and also “hurting” because of the expensive areas. Definitely pick up the phone or go in person and ask about their lending programs. Also – banks that don’t sell off to Freddie/agencies and actually hold their loans in house are going to have more flexibility. I would almost avoid the BofAs, TD Banks, etc, and go straight to my local regional bank/credit union. Good luck!

    • Parfait

      I feel your pain. I spent some time today looking at houses for sale in my midwestern hometown and weeping. If everything goes pear-shaped for me in LA, like if it gets overrun by zombies and everyone I know here gets eaten, I can always crawl back there and buy something lovely to live in for a pittance.

      • Lorelai Gilmore

        Never look at real estate in other cities! It will just make you rend your clothing and weep. And never tell your inlaws (who live in the lowest COL metropolitan area in America) how much you paid for your teeny California house. Ask me how I know.

        • Nonny

          Oh gosh, I live in one of the most expensive real estate markets in the world (no exaggeration – we are regularly on all the “most expensive” lists) and even though my house is in a slightly less expensive suburb, I am incredulous at how much my house cost. I was embarrassed to tell my parents (who really don’t live that far away, but in a very different real estate market) how much we paid. I could buy a mansion for that amount just about anywhere else in North America. Or buy the same house in another location and have my mortgage paid off in 10 years. It makes me want to cry.

      • Blonde Lawyer

        I had friends from LA visiting in our New England town. We were walking down the street and LA friend stopped, wide mouthed, like she had just seen a car accident. She was watching an electronic billboard in awe of the advertised homes and prices.

    • Bonnie

      Consider homes that are not perfect now bit can be renovated over time to be your perfect home. Not a complete gut job fixer upper but maybe a house that needs updating but has good bones.

    • Susie

      Look into whether any of the cities or counties in the area you want to buy in have any downpayment assistance programs? I got one for “middle income first time homebuyers”, which resulted in me putting 5% down, the county program paying 15%, and the remaining 80% standard mortgage. No mortgage insurance required.

    • Anon

      Not sure about the rules now, but (several years ago) I was able to withdraw 10K from an IRA without penalty to put toward a first time home purchase. You could ask a financial advisor whether you can do that and whether its a good financial move for you.

  10. Anonymous

    I have an abundance of potatoes and tomatoes from my farmer’s box over the last couple weeks. I don’t particularly like either very much-any good recipe suggestions? Especially those that I can cook and freeze?

    • Spirograph

      Shepherd’s pie? I don’t have a favorite recipe, but it’s my go-to for using up leftover mashed potatoes.

    • Anon for this

      Pasta sauce and jar it? Maybe just dice up the potatoes into french fries that can be frozen and then either baked or fried later.

      • Baconpancakes

        If you do this, parboil the fries for a few minutes, then freeze them. That will give them the crispy outside texture that makes fries delicious.

    • hoola hoopa

      I have good luck freezing pureed potato soup. I add leeks and cauliflower. For best results, freeze before adding dairy or dairy substitute, but I usually add beforehand because I freeze leftovers and don’t mind a bit of an off texture.

  11. Jordan

    I heard this winter is supposed to be particularly bad from several of my clients. So maybe Kat means people who don’t normally need a coat will need a coat. Or that the winter will be long. Or bad.

    • TO Lawyer

      Please don’t say that. I’m still having traumatic flashbacks from this past winter. I don’t think I can do this again. I may need to move.

      • Equity's Darling

        Yes. Agreed. The snow this week made my flashbacks real life. It was not good.

      • housecounsel

        I am ready. I bought two pairs of gorgeous Sorel boots, including the ones I coveted all last winter, and I actually want to wear them.

      • Bewitched

        Took me a minute but I snorted out laughing at this. Not entirely sure why!

      • Jordan

        They are all groundhogs. But they pay well and I feel I can adequately communicate with them and represent their interests. Especially when it comes to land use mediations with beavers (damming up the place) or squirrels (nut hoarding, nuts EVERYWHERE). Plus, they love my Bill Murray jokes.

        For real though, a farmer/country type client, jewelry store owner & staff, and a mechanic. They all referenced the farmer’s almanac and 2 of 3 referenced the “woolly bear stripe” which I have no idea what that means. All of them randomly mentioned this though within the past week and I hadn’t given it much thought collectively until I read this post and feared it’s some trending topic I missed.

        I hear the next winter will be the winter of the left accent glove. In case anyone plans that far ahead or already has too many coats and wants to get a jump on it this year and be a trend setter.

        • ExecAssist

          Lolz this had me dying (laughing)…minus that second paragraph…since I’ll be moving up north just in time for this thing that seasoned veterans are dreading :(

        • Anastasia

          lolz, The woolly bear stripe refers to a fuzzy-looking caterpillar. I used to get inordinately excited about finding them when I was little. They are the best caterpillar. Alas, I rarely see them where I live now… that’s probably why I didn’t know about the winter of the coat.

          Thanks for the tip about the glove!

        • Nonny

          Oooh, the left accent glove. A distant cousin of the blue little fingernail.

          Although how do you know if the accent glove is the right one or the left one?

        • tesyaa

          Last year I heard people saying that the Farmer’s Almanac predicted a bad winter, and I totally disregarded it… I shouldn’t have. So now you have me worried.

        • Brit

          I think the wooly bear stripe refers to wooly caterpillars and how thick their one stripe is?? Where that little nugget of (possibly wrong) information came from is beyond me. I just know the 7 rule, but that’s because of Laura Ingalls Wilder.

          • tesyaa

            I cannot even count how many times last year we invoked Laura, Carrie, Almanzo and “The Long Winter”.

          • Anon

            Someone should go find a muskrat house and report back on how thick the walls are.

  12. BB

    I am absolutely hopeless when it comes to this color – I have a serious mint/light blue addiction! I’m glad this coat doesn’t come in my size, but it is giving me a push to sew myself the baby blue tweed coat I’ve been meaning to make for months!

  13. Wildkitten

    I am so over my warm coat from last summer – it’s very collegiate, not professional, and I wore it every day for months on end during polar vortex. Anyone have great suggestions for super warm coats? I don’t want to spend as much $$ as the patagonia tres.

  14. MNF

    TJ – How friendly are you with your coworkers?

    I work in a relatively small law office (mid-sized? 30-40 total staff), but there’s no one else at my level . At every other job, I’ve always had an ally of sorts – someone in a similar position that I could chat to about work and with whom I could grab lunch or coffee. I guess what I’m missing is a colleague whose office I can pop into to say, “I’ve been researching this issue for partner for 8 hours – talk to me for 5 minutes so I feel like a human again.” Now I feel like I have to be on guard, all the time. Is this a silly thing to be concerned with?

    • hoola hoopa

      How long have you been at this office? I’ve had a couple that fell to social relationships easily and others that took a year or two.

      It does sound like you will need to open up to chatting with people not at your level on the org chart, which frankly I think you should be open to even when you do have a parallel.

      • MNF

        It’s been over a year. It’s not so much that I’m silent all day. I have chats with people I work with (“your kid just started kindergarten – how’d the first day go,” “how was your weekend/vacation,” “what do you think of this local news story featuring your suburb”). I guess I just miss having someone to commiserate with when the supervising atty gives me a third (different) set of instructions within a week (i.e., do it this way, I finish, actually no, I changed my mind, do it this way, etc.).

      • Marilla

        +1 to it takes time and it doesn’t have to be someone at your level. Some of my best beloveds at work (whether I was a summer intern or a senior advisor) have been admin staff. Or managers, to think of it.

    • cr

      I agree — small office means you won’t have an exact counterpart. I’m in a comparably sized office, and my office confidantes are either same position/major difference in seniority or different position entirely. Some are same age, some aren’t.

    • Boston Legal Eagle

      I find that I have the best co-worker conversations when people are there late chatting over dinner. Not sure if you have reasonable hours or not, but generally people let loose near the end of the night when there is less pressure to respond to emails, get daytime work out of the way, etc.

  15. Student Loans

    A lot of people here commiserate about their astronomical student loans. I’m just curious what percentage of monthly income student loans generally take up. Semi-humble brag: I’m fortunate enough to not have student loans, but a $2200 monthly loan payment (as mentioned above) would wipe out the majority of paycheck. So I assume your income is somewhat more proportionate. Is my assumption way off?

    • Sydney Bristow

      My minimum payments are nearly 30% of my take home pay. I’m trying to pay them off as quickly as possible though so they are typically higher than that (ideally 50% if I can swing it). It really sucks.

    • A Nonny Moose

      My payments are nearly 1/3 of my take home income (30%). It is pushed up by my husbands salary (which is triple mine) but he has even higher loans than I do.

    • anon

      Mine would be that if I did a standard payment plan but because I am in a similar situation I use Income Based Repayment so I have flexibility.

    • ExecAssist

      Up until last week, mine were ˜12% of my take-home pay. It didn’t seem like a lot to me, and it wasn’t income-based. Since I quit my job to make a career switch, I just went on income-based payments which dropped me down to $0/month.

      Also, I’m jealous that you have none and I look forward to being debt-free!

    • Anon

      I’m the $2200/month poster. My monthly take-home is just over $6,000 based on two paychecks per month (I’m paid bi-weekly and I don’t count the two “extra” paychecks per year, those are straight savings/splurges). My healthcare, life insurance, dental, and 401(k) (I max out) are already taken out.

    • HSAL

      I pay extra in order to get one loan out of the way faster, so right now it’s about 18% of household takehome. Next May it will be less than 5%. When I was single and paying extra on some other small loans to finish them off early, it was probably close to 25% of my monthly income.

    • Boston Legal Eagle

      Currently paying approx. 25% of my and SO’s combined take-home pay (which is only a little less than the rent we pay in our high COL city). Looking forward to getting these loans paid off!

    • AIMS

      Just under 20% if doing minimum payments on a 25 yr. plan. My SO’s are higher because he also has undergrad, which luckily I don’t. We actually have a healthy-ish down payment saved up even for our HCOL area to buy a place but because our loans end up basically being a mortgage, we can’t really afford to pay for the monthly payments that would be required (mortgage + maintenance) to get a place that we could reasonably live in for 5+ years and also pay our loans. Sometimes I wonder if we should just take the down payment money to pay down the loans and start from scratch but then I worry we’d never get there again. So now we just try to build a bigger down payment and pay off loans so that we have lower monthly mortgage costs and hopefully with rising income it will eventually all work out. But lots of big ifs there. When my non-law school/grad school friends find out how much loans we have, they are all shocked. And we’re not even the worst amongst some of our classmates….

    • Anon for this

      Payments for SO + me combined were about 30% of our total income at first. Now, they are at about 8% of just my take home pay (it’s been 7ish years). The reduction is a combo of pay increases and paying off debt. At least one of the loans we had was only a 3 year term so it went away relatively quickly. Others we threw extra money at and got rid of. For one, we extended the term to reduce the payment from over $600 to under $200 because the interest rate went down to less than 1%.

  16. CKB

    So… I got laid off today. It was 100% cost cutting measure. My division has been struggling to meet targets, we had 2 controllers, and I had the least seniority. Luckily they paid a decent severance package, and I live in a city that has lots of need for accounting professionals. However it still sucks. Have to tell the kids when they get home. I’m going to take the next few days off to process, but will update my resume next week so I can get hunting for a new position.

    Anyway, not really looking for advice or anything, but I know so,e of you have been in this position and can commiserate. :(

    • Marilla

      Nooooo! So sorry to hear that CKB. But I think everyone here knows how awesome and professional you are and you will no doubt find something new in not too long. Definitely give yourself a break first though :)

    • Equity's Darling

      I’m really sorry to hear that! I know you’ll land somewhere good though, there are usually pretty good options in our city. Something similar happened to me, and I am so happy with how the cards played out, I landed somewhere better, with better work and I’m happier.

    • tesyaa

      Is there a huge rush to tell the kids? No need to keep it a secret (I know people who have done that for weeks or months, which I strongly wouldn’t do), but just for a day or two until you get your bearings. If you feel better and more confident about approaching your job search, the kids will feel more secure too. (I have no idea how old they are, which might make a difference).

      Sorry to hear the bad news, hope the job search is as easy as possible!

    • Sydney Bristow

      Oh I’m so sorry! That sucks. Do something nice for yourself today.

      • Cube Life

        +1 definitely wallow a bit this week and then hit the ground running with the job hunt next week. Good luck and chin up!!

    • JJ

      I’m so sorry to hear that, CKB. I hope you get a chance to give yourself a break and then capitalize on this.

    • Anon

      CKB – from everything you’ve posted here, it sounds like Team (Lastname) is a strong, strong unit. Your kids will be sad for you, and maybe a little bit scared because it’s something bad that happened to their Awesome Mom and because change can be scary for youngsters, but you’ll all pull together and get through it because you have such a strong foundation.

      Maybe make one day this week a super special “the kids get to skip school and everyone is having a spontaneous fun day together!” day, before you plunge into the job search.

    • hoola hoopa

      I’m so sorry. I hope this is a blessing in disguise and the soon-to-offer position is even better. While it didn’t feel like it at the time, getting laid off (the entire group was cut) was one of the best things to ever happen to me, because I landed the perfect job for me at the perfect company. GL!

    • Anon for this

      I hear you. I was laid of last month – lay offs are pretty normal in my industry. But sometimes these things can work out for the best. You’ll have a new job in no time, and then you can use that severance check for something fun.

    • houda

      It sucks but I’m glad you are very clear about your next steps.
      My employer has been undergoing a “temporary” restructuring for the past 2 years and it’s getting worse. We are all waiting in silence who gets cut next.
      I think you are handling this like a champ. With this mindset, you’ll get a new job in no time.

  17. ATTN Comments About Chicago Dress for this weekend

    Hey. Not sure if this question was yesterday or Tuesday, but today is COLD in Chicago. I am wearing a jacket (lightweight, Burberry standard) and boots. Almost everyone I see is wearing a jacket. Didn’t want you to come in skirts and short sleeves and be unprepared. Have fun!

    • Mpls

      If it’s anything like MN, its supposed to be cool (highs in high 50s/low 60s, lows in the 40s, wind) through the weekend and then potentially highs in the 70s again next week.

  18. people skills

    Any advice on how to be better at building rapport quickly with people? Let’s say you don’t see them that frequently

      • Wildkitten

        I think that’s how you bully people into being so uncomfortable they give you things you aren’t entitled to, not how you build two-way relationships.

      • Unicorn

        Yes, it was a joke. Re: how not to build relationships, see: snarky comments about jokes.

    • Traveller

      Ask open ended questions that get them talking about themselves.
      And remember key points (take notes if needed) between the times you see them (ie if you talked about their key project etc)

    • TXLawyer

      Find common ground, identify mutual friends, stay up on current events, tv, sports, etc.

    • Wildkitten

      Ask them questions about themselves and remember their answers for next time.

  19. ugh pillows!

    Please help me. I am on the edge of buying $150 of throw pillows. I love to put out different pillows seasonally. I was web browsing today and found fall colored pillows at World Market that I fell hopelessly in love with. But $150 seems so decadent for throw pillows to me!!

    • Red Beagle

      I don’t have the dress, but poplin as a cotton weave may not look professional after a couple of hours at work. That being said, it’s Lands End and they are very good at wrinkle-free button down shirts.

    • meme

      I really like that dress, but it doesn’t look like a work dress to me. I think because of the fabric and big belt.

  21. TOS

    TJ – work is taking orders for the iphone 6, due tomorrow, and I have no idea if the phone or the phablet would be ideal – I have an iphone, and an ipad 2, and do want to upgrade. I had designs on stopping by the iphone shop today, and there was no time, and the decision is due tomorrow.

    The larger phone is appealing because I am just not that nimble with texting with the key sizes, and I routinely have a purse/satchel/tote.

    The smaller one would reflect how I use it to tuck along to take pictures, and size can matter if I want to tuck it in a pocket.

    Of those who have made this decision, what was your rationale?

    • Anon

      The smaller one – I like my 5 and I want it to fit in more handbags including smaller ones I’d take out in the evening. I have an iPad and iPad mini so the larger cross-over is unnecessary to me.

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