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Frugal Friday’s Workwear Report: Faux Leather A-Line Maxi Skirt

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A woman wearing a black long-sleeved shirt, a brown faux-leather skirt, and black heels

Our daily workwear reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices.

Leather (or faux leather) in the office can be a bit controversial, but the general consensus around these parts is that it can work if the styling is right. This A-line maxi skirt from Vince Camuto is a classic shape, and with a conservative top and accessories, I think it would be perfect for almost any office.

I would probably go for a feminine blouse in a silky fabric to balance things out, like this bow-neck blouse from Ann Taylor. Sadly, it doesn’t seem like this skirt is available in petites, so unless you’re willing to spend quite a bit on alterations, this is going to be for the taller folks only! 

The skirt is $39.97 at Nordstrom Rack and comes in sizes S-XL. It also comes in navy and merlot. 

Sales of note for 10/2:

167 Comments

  2. Anyone have a third-party tested brand of creatine they can recommend? Decided to start taking it but always wary of our unregulated supplement history. A friend works at a lab that does testing for some popular brands and that hasn’t helped my confidence, ha.

    1. I use Thorne creatine. Their website says their supplements are third party tested.

      I started about a month ago with the recommended 5g dose. It disrupted my sleep, made my face flush dramatically, and increased my heart rate during exercise. I scaled back to 3g and all those side effects went away.

      2. Thorne is probably fine right now, but they were just purchased by Proctor & Gamble, so you can expect the quality to change and become junk. Super upsetting because I use their creatine and supplements.

        I just purchased creatine from Crucial Four and I am liking it so far. I also use their salt as an electrolyte.

        1. Thorne was owned by private equity, and was recently purchased by Procter & Gamble (not Proctor). Once the private equity firm decided to sell Thorne, several companies bid on it. Being purchased by P&G is not necessarily a bad outcome, P&G already has a huge presence in personal care, resources they can invest in the brand, and a reputation to uphold.

      3. i looked at Thorne a while ago – none of their stuff is USP verified, right? i always forget the other main body that does it. i try to only buy supplements that have those 2 verifications.

      1. She can’t share brand names or specific results – just things like “we tested a protein powder that had a lot of lead” or “one vitamin D supplement had no measurable vitamin D.”

        1. Maybe ask what brand she uses?

          This seems like a very extreme interpretation of the NDA she likely signed.

          1. How is that extreme for a company to prohibit discussing a specific company’s testing results? That would obviously be confidential information.

          2. Of course you don’t ask her to share specific test results, but can’t you ask if she foreswears use of all such products for herself, or if there are any she feels comfortable keeping in her own pantry? Obviously don’t trash your friendship by then blabbing that all over the place and telling everyone your friend endorsed the brand, but it seems really weird to not ask the actual expert you personally know.

    3. I’d ask whatever doctor recommended it, but my doctor usually just goes by whatever manufacturer provided the supplement used in the studies that are the reason for considering taking it in the first place. These often also have some third party certifications, some of which are meaningful. Some supplements are regulated in countries that have stronger regulations. And sometimes there’s a ConsumerLabs review though I am actually not sure how reliable that is (your friend may know!).

      Googling suggests Creapure from Germany is the brand name of the creatine monohydrate in a lot of studies. But if you’re hoping to take another form of creatine you’d have to start over.

      It’s right to be wary of our unregulated supplement industry! But it’s also wrong to be excessively suspicious of the exact same manufacturers we rely on for baby formula, prenatals, enteral nutrition, medical foods, deficiency treatments, and research. We just have to do a lot of homework to make sure we’re sticking with the reliable suppliers.

    4. No recommendation, because I don’t know, but I’ve tried most of them. I know my husband prefers the Legion brand to the Mary Ruth, but I think that’s specific to taste. I asked chat, which recommended Legion. I ordered Mary Ruth because I was looking for vegan (I have alpha gal.)

    5. Look for supplements that have USP or NSF certification, showing they have been tested for purity / contents. Your doctor should tell you that. Interestingly, a lot of the supplements sold by Costco have these certifications.

      You can go to their (USP or NSF) websites and search for your supplement, and then find companies that have their certification for that supplement.

      As the other poster mentioned, it is good to use the supplement source used in clinical testing that has proven benefit.

  3. If you have longish, straightish hair, what’s your typical wash and go routine?
    I was using a hot air brush to straighten and smooth mine, but I started to feel like it was looking really flat. I’ve started experimenting with blow drying and putting in a bun while I get ready, which leaves it curly, but it’s really unpredictable-sometimes it looks great and other times, just messy (and it’s just as much work as the blow out). I sometimes try to add gel and scrunch it thinking I’ll get waves, but it’s usually just messy. What works for you?

      1. Thanks! What’s your process with it? (Put it in right after washing, blow drying, whatever)?

    2. I wash it at night 4-5 times a month and let it air dry. It’s usually good to go in the morning. If I need to step it up, I’ll blow dry it before bed and it’s much smoother.

    3. I wash mine every 3-4 days, and blow dry w/ a paddle brush, brushing across my head at first to give my roots some volume. On non wash days I use a hot air paddle brush to smooth and shape when necessary, but I do it from underneath in a couple of layers to give a little lift. If it’s feeling flat I’ll heat up a round brush a bit w/ a hairdryer and then curl while applying heat w/ the dryer. I’m sure a plug in heated round brush would do the same, I just don’t want to buy another tool.

    4. Long straight and fine hair:
      Generally wash every other day in the evening. Currently I use the L’Oreal Elvive shampoo and conditioner in the black bottle and the trader joe’s leave-in conditioner spray as a detangler. I brush through with a paddle brush and then leave it damp for 30 mins (if I have the time) to reduce blow drying time. Flip the hair upside down and blow dry the roots, flip back upright and do the rest until 80% dry, then use a 2″ round brush in rough sections to dry the rest of the way and flip the ends under. Round brush is essential for making it very smooth and shiny. Sometimes will finish with Nuxe oil on the ends.

      1. I also have long straight and fine hair and this is very similar to what I do, except that I wash it almost every day. I live in a humid climate and my hair gets very greasy very quickly. The round brush is key and seems to give me a bit of a volume lift in addition to making it smooth and shiny.

        1. I “trained” my hair during the pandemic to not need washing every day, but I also live in a not particularly hot and humid place. I’ve also found a silk pillowcase helps for keeping it looking nice!

          1. I tried this over a maternity leave and my hair blew me a raspberry and did a hard pass on my attempts to be the boss. Camping concurs that there is no adapting for some of us.

          2. I tried this briefly during the pandemic because *everyone* was recommending it and it also didn’t work for me. TBH, I don’t find it that difficult to wash it essentially every day. I guess that’s the upside (at least for me) of fine, straight hair. Washing it is quick, drying it is quick, and my hair seems healthy enough that I don’t think I’m wrecking it with shampoo and 5-8 minutes of blow drying. My hair is comparatively glorious and can go for a few days without looking meh whenever I travel out west, though. Alas.

          3. I trained my hair when I was home sick one day (pre-pandemic) and watched an hour long Wen infomercial 😂

          4. Some hair isn’t trainable and just needs to be washed. I’m convinced there’s a conspiracy among hairdressers to push this anti-shampoo narrative.

            Certain hair types really can’t be washed frequently. But most of the time someone talks about their twice weekly shampoo schedules
            …yeah, it looks like you don’t wash your hair enough.

    5. Nothing right now. Humidity is not high enough for waves so it’s just fuzzing up. Bun for now.

    6. I wash it before bed every night. It dries while I’m sleeping then in the morning either straighten it (to give the ends a little bend) or curl it depending on humidity and how much time I have. My roots are always flat if I blow dry it, no matter what products or techniques I use. The same thing happens at the salon so it’s not a skill issue.

      1. I have flat roots too, but I ask my hairdresser to thin it out/make it less heavy, and whatever she does helps.

    7. Wash with a no sulphate shampoo (which my hair and scalp prefers to avoid), quick anti-tangle brush, towel on hair while I dress etc.

      Shake it out, and a small clip to lift front while doing skincare and make-up.

      Hair dryer with round brush, lifting the hair, not smoothing to almost dry.

      Curl cream from bottom to ear height, scrunch and lift. Some hair volume wax to lift crown.

      OR salt water spray, scrunch and lift, for more texture.

      OR air dry after towel. Curl cream, scrunch and lift.

    8. I wash at night every other day and blow dry straight. In the morning I use a heated round brush, flat iron, or curling iron, and spray volumizing spray at the roots. I agree with another commenter to have your stylist thin your hair a little (I just get some thinning at the ends of my hair) so its not as weighed down.

    9. My hair is more wavy, but I’m replying because usually I do use a hot air brush. Recently I’ve been putting a little bit of curl cream in and braiding it and letting it dry like that, and that’s worked well to create defined waves that look like curls and not mess

    10. I run my head upside down and blow dry it, combine it my fingers or a brush. If I feel like putting in more effort I use a round brush. I don’t use any product – I feel like it doesn’t do much of anything and it seems gross to have extra gunk in my hair for no reason.

      1. I feel this way about product. I would just have to wash my hair more frequently if I used it and it would be harder to run my hands through my hair.

  4. Does anyone have recommendations for flat back earrings / nap earrings / comfortable earrings? I’m trying to wear earrings more often and need to get some better quality earrings that are comfortable, but not yet ready to spend $$$$ money yet. Would prefer ~$100-150 or less for a set.

    I’ve been looking at Maison Miru wondering if they are worth it. I also have been looking at Aiti because I really like the style of their arc hoop earrings, but then wondering if it’s scammy. Yesterday I fell down a rabbit hole on the Kosiner website, who I had never heard of but I really like the way they sort their earrings. Anyway, if you have experience please tell me what is good and what is crap. Thank you!

    1. The Melaniefavreau shop on Etsy has a pair of gold earrings that I’ve worn non-stop for 2 years now. Very comfortable. Someone has to help you put them in, but otherwise fuss free.

    2. Have you thought about just getting backs from Chrysmela Catch? They won’t fall off and then you can keep any earring back from stabbing you if you are sleeping in them (I don’t do that but do it sometimes when camping or traveling).

      1. I did think about that, but honestly my little studs that I like are not great quality (like the kind that turn my pierced holes slightly black after a few days) already so it’s worth getting some better ones. But one I have the better ones, that is good to keep in mind!

    3. My second holes started growing in during the pandemic because I quit wearing jewelry. I bought some 14k gold mini hoops from Mejuri. They kind of close on themselves and I just leave them in. It’s been 5 years now and they’re still going strong.

    4. I have Maison Miru nap earrings that I wear in my second holes and I really like them. I’ve had the current pair in for months and I never notice them. They are really hard to put in and you may need help!

    6. I buy cheap cubic zirconia surgical steel ones on amazon. They are like $10 for six of them. More than one person has mistaken the smaller ones for being real studs. Search for WSSXC flat back earrings.

    7. I’ve been super happy with my Pave Lightning Bar Nap Earrings from Miru, which are a dupe for Mateo’s bypass studs.

    8. I have Maison Miru crystal studs in my second holes and have had them in for a year or so now with no issue. I did not have trouble putting them in. I’ve also worn simple small gold clicker hoops from Quince in the same holes and those worked as well for long-term wear.

  5. I’m looking for new cereal or soup bowls (NOT the pasta-style bowls, like properly deep ones) that are … fun? Whimsical? Not boring? Something that sparks joy.

    Anyone have a set they love? I do need them to be dishwasher/microwave safe. My six year old does that part of the dishes. She is very careful, but she is still a six year old handling wet dishes, so the ability to withstand minor drops/bangs would be helpful!

      2. OMG I could have lived the rest of my life without knowing Fiesta had holiday pieces…

    3. I also could use some new cereal bowls. I was planning to check World Market.

      For dropping, enamel bowls are amazing. I don’t love them for hot soup though. For that I have double handle bowls which I love but bought ages ago!

        1. I think mine were from even longer ago, and then I got new ones from I think Home Goods. I love handled bowls for soup or chili!

  6. I feel that this skirt length is really tricky. It’s not really workwear. It’s really not casual wear (not for cooking dinner or going to the store or band practice or errands). I feel that in a wool flannel or a tartan, it’s wear to horsey event with flat boots (not what I do, but an event I can imagine).

    I have a real leather pencil skirt that is lined and I wear it a bit on Fridays when it is cooler because it is a good drinks-after-work outfit.

    I also have a pleated longer faux leather skirt that I wear in winter because it has tremendous insulating properties. But it is a IDGAF look that really works with no dress code other than “guest lecturer in history of philosophy of science class.”

    1. This is one of those things that I think of as perfectly acceptable for my (biz-cas) workplace, but just not really the image I want you to project. It’s also (for me) too conservative to wear when I’m going someplace fun but too fussy for someplace very casual. So, I’d probably wear it to a family or church event, or something like that, but that’s it. I do sort of like it, but it doesn’t really have enough of a use-case to justify.

    2. Haha “guest lecturer in history of philosophy of science class” is the only dress code I want. Love it!

          8. Only people who have never been chic a day in their life take issue with the word, in my experience.

          9. @2:48, are there any women you take seriously other than yourself? At all?

            Figuring out why you’re discounting so many other women as unserious might be a good place to start.

      2. No one will send you home but they might question your judgement a bit (even if unfairly.)

        1. The only time I’ve questioned judgment based on what someone wears to work is when they look like they’re going to clean out the garage. This isn’t that. What it is though is a trap with an office chair – it’s begging to get caught under the wheels.

    4. I always like these in theory but feel like Little House on the Prairie when I wear them. Or yes, philosophy professor. Depends on the material.

      1. So much of fashion now looks good on the young, the tall, and the thin. On me, a lot of it is bad cosplay Ma Ingalls.

    5. I would absolutely wear this length to work with flat boots, but not in leather. I feel like this is a very awkward length for leather.

      1. Agreed. I definitely wear skirts like this to work with boots, but also wouldn’t do leather

  7. I’m looking at a couple of Quince sweaters. On the sizing chart, I fall between a large and an extra large. Would you go with the bigger size, or the smaller? My concern with going smaller is that more tension on the fabric would lead to pilling. But, I also don’t want to look sloppy.

    (Reposting here because I accidentally put this on yesterday’s!)

    1. For me this would depend on fabric composition and intended care. Cotton you intend to put in the dryer? Get the bigger size. Wool you’ll hand wash and air dry? Get the smaller size

    2. I have a few of the cashmere cardigans—I took a medium but probably could have done a small. I wanted some wiggle room and am happy with my choice. I ordered a medium in a cotton sweater and felt that its size was sloppy. It might be dependent on sweater shape.

      2. I have a long wool sweater from Quince that would probably be a nice fall sweater if it fit. Instead its a size small and so large it looks like a bathrobe. I use it as my around the house robe. I’m normally between a size small and medium.

    3. With Quince I think shipping and returns are free, so it’s better to order 2 sizes and return the one that doesn’t fit. I only bought a few items, but I wouldn’t say the sizing is consistent. The joggers and sweaters were true to size, maybe a bit on the large size, but the dresses definitely ran small.

  8. I’m so excited right now. The not-for-profit that I’m on the board of launched our annual fundraising event last night, a silent auction. In just over 12 hours, we have had multiple bids on items. The auction will run for two weeks and end during a big dinner that we have sold out the tickets for.

    I was brought on the board specifically to help fundraise, and I have found that I have a real talent for it. I have a no-f’s-given approach for making the ask, at the same time offering the understanding that it might not be a good time for someone.

    1. Question for you. How long in advance of the silent auction did you start promoting the items? Two weeks seems long for an auction. Do you do a lot of promoting for it? I’m on board of a local non profit and got volunteered to help with our annual benefit. It’s quite an experience for me as someone who doesn’t like to fundraise or sell, and knows very little about marketing.

      1. I started soliciting donations in February for the auction in September. We started actively promoting the dinner in July. The silent auction promotion started in August. We’re posting about it on the organization’s social media at least twice a day now.

        We received a marketing grant from the USDA last winter that allowed us to hire a part time marketing associate.

        My best advice is to come up with small themes you can use to tie multiple items together. We have a Choose Your Own Adventure item, with zoo passes, a gymnastics birthday party, a roller skating family night, and several other small items. A Taste of the Old West, with western novels written by a local author, bourbon from a local distillery, and meat from two of our local butchers.

        One thing that we’ve already found: quilt guilds love to have a place to donate their work. We have one this year that has already doubled its starting bid. The quilter had already offered to make one each year, because her family and friends already have her work, and she loves to quilt.

        Two weeks is pretty standard for silent online auctions, based on my experience and what the fundraising site has told us.

    2. That is so exciting! I have dropped off several boards based on my dislike of fundraising and I am so glad that there are people like you that have a talent for it. What good fortune for your non-profit

      1. I don’t think anyone is ‘good’ at fundraising, they just lack social tact and have a lot of audacity so people give to escape the awkward interaction before downgrading the relationship to acquaintance, AVOID.

          1. And it’s a skill. There’s a knack to not making the ask awkward, just like any other social interaction. It’s not something I expected to be good at, given that I’m an introvert who really doesn’t like noise, but I can talk to almost anyone and find common ground. I give the 30-second pitch and then let the conversation flow.

          2. That is probably exactly why you are good at fundraising. You are not an obnoxious smarmy extroverted salesperson. You make genuine connections and don’t badger people.

            There are two competing fund drives currently going on at my church. The person in charge of annual giving made a very clear presentation of the church’s entire budget, including what programming each line supports and exactly why there is a shortfall. Afterwards my husband and I asked one another “should we increase our annual giving to help cover the deficit?” The chairman of the capital campaign, on the other hand, is an odious man with a day job as a “financial advisor” who sells all sorts of investments on commission. He wears a Rolex and shiny shoes and hair gel and pretends he’s your best friend while putting on the hard sell to contribute. I know the church needs a new roof and all that, but I am very tempted to give the money we’d intended for the capital campaign to the annual fund just because I detest this guy so much.

        2. Fundraising is the nonprofit of sales. There are some people who excel at it, and they are very valuable.

          1. It’s usually because the ask is on false premises. Like you get invited for coffee then they drop the ask on you so you’re like oh they didn’t actually want to hang out it was a pretext for the ask. No amount of delicate phrasing can undo that ick.

          2. I never think anyone is asking me for coffee without a reason. But I work in politics.

          3. Right? When the Director of Development or one of their team asks you out for coffee, you know the ask is coming.

      1. Be thoughtful about who you approach and how. Everyone has something to contribute, but you don’t need everyone’s contribution every time.

        Look for low effort, high reward opportunities. Our major fundraising effort takes a lot of work and energy. We’re also going to do a longest drive competition at a local golf course later this fall. (Charity golf events are money makers, but full tournaments are high effort to put on.)

        You can look for local businesses that offer NFP donations. One of our local liquor stores does a monthly tasting class for a minimal fee, and they donate the proceeds to a local nonprofit. I got us on the rotation, so every 4 to 6 months, we will get a small amount.

  9. I posted here a couple weeks ago about some out of the blue jaw and tooth pain and several of you provided helpful feedback. I ended up in the ER after waking up to a hr of 150 one night. After that it became more frequent and I got nausea and had a lot of sinus pressure. The current working theory is I must have had an infection that set off an arrhythmia. I’ve spent the last week in and out of the pcp and ER and have follow ups with cardio scheduled. After a course of antibiotics and nausea meds the doctors have no explanation for what the infection is or how to get me back on my feet. My dentist, who I trust a lot, and an endodontist are recommending I pull a resorbed molar in that area based on my symptoms and because it will eventually need to go anyway. I have a consult for that on Monday but am just feeling overwhelmed and the doctors I’ve talked to don’t agree it is tooth related. I feel like I have been fortunate to have access to all of these providers but they just point me back to the others and I don’t feel like I’ve gotten guidance I can actually act on. What would you do next if it was you?

    1. I would get tested for an immune deficiency (simple blood draw). Unusual infections, such as osteomyelitis, are a symptom. It’s very possible this is just some weird one-off situation with no immune deficiency but since the testing is extremely easy and most people have delayed diagnosis, I would recommend getting it done.

    2. How old are you, how are your blood lipids, and is there a personal history of angina or any family history of early heart issues?

      The heart rate spike makes me curious and heart pain can be referred elsewhere, especially in women.

      1. 40, completely normal, and yes – my uncle on one side died from a widowmaker in his 50s and on the other side my aunt and grandmother had afib. The ER ruled out a heart attack or anything immediate but am following up with cardiology with an echo scheduled later today and a holter monitor. But I’m having nausea, chills, etc. which seems to be leading them away from heart.

        1. Sometimes in infection is cardiac (they may want to do a cardiac MRI especially if they don’t like what they see on the holter monitor).

        2. I would definitely wait until the cardiology appointment to make any decision decisions. Nausea, chills, and all are actually common with a lot of cardiac situations.

    3. yikes. i’m so glad you’re being cared for! i hate to be That Lady but have you considered putting your symptoms/charts into chatgpt? it can be pretty good about giving you questions to ask your doctors.

      1. I have done this and like all things AI it gives me a different answer depending on how it’s framed. I just feel like I’m being bounced around without any real direction. I also found out during this that my PCP is moving so this may be the push I needed to finally go direct primary care or concierge.

    4. Mystery infection sounds like an infectious disease consult to me, but maybe that happened at the ER?

      1. PCP suggested that as a next step if the tooth extraction doesn’t solve things. I am really upset about losing a tooth especially since absorption is apparently not well understood and so no one can be really sure it will help here.

        1. I would reverse the order of things and see infectious disease before endodontist.

          I’m not sure what your status is right now in terms of symptoms and meds, but I would also just not do dental surgery with cardiology follow ups still in my calendar.

          2. That’s a valid point. I think I’ve been hyper focused on it being dental related because the first big tachycardia episode started the same day I got a twinge of pain in my jaw and the only thing that has been consistent throughout this is pain and pressure in the roof of my mouth on that side and some random teeth hurting here and there. Also considering seeing an ENT to at least scope the area and see if that sheds any light.

          3. If cardiology gives you the AOK to go ahead with the surgery, I’d feel better about that.

      2. Were there any indicators for infection beyond pain? Fever, localized warmth, high WBCs in the bloodwork?

        I’ve had zillions of infections but not with a HR spike and severe pain.

        1. Low grade fever, chills, and WBC about twice my normal (mine is usually low because I have lupus).

        2. Agree. I would not be attributing this to a local infection, now systemic, if there are no other systemic signs of infection. I would see an Infectious disease doctor ASAP. It is clear the doctors don’t know what they are treating.

          OP – what imaging have you had of your face/jaw? You want to see that there is signs of an abscess/local infection before you start pulling teeth aimlessly.

          1. I had a regular CT for sinuses etc and a CBCT of teeth. Endodontist said there is no active infection visible but that it is possible the resorbed tooth root has hidden infection leaking into my sinus. I have confirmed with Dr Google this is a thing called Odogentic Sinusitis and is consistent with my symptoms of pressure and pain in roof of mouth and sinus area. This is why I feel confused though! Why are multiple people telling me to pull it if there’s no clear sign of infection?

          2. Also FWIW I have known about the resorbed tooth for a long time. I was told it would have to come out someday but I could wait until it presented an issue. I think that may be why they don’t seem very concerned about removing it even without clear infection signs.

    5. People can get arrhythmias without infections. I wouldn’t jump to causation here.

      I’d see cardio and get the heart issue sorted. Then once that’s stable, I’d get the molar pulled.

  10. Would love a product recommendation. I have color treated hair and for some reason, the ends always get stiff and crunchy if that makes sense. I have tried using extra conditioner but don’t see a difference. TIA for any ideas!

    2. Try the protein mask, but that sounds like it just needs to be trimmed off. Would a small trim be feasible?

    3. Oribe Gold Lust shampoo and conditioner. Follow up with the Oribe supershine light (not the regular) moisturizing cream. You’ll need to use a clarifying product once every couple of weeks as it is heavy. It’s expensive but so worth it, and usually you can get trial sizes or kits at Sephora.

    4. YMMV, but my hair gets stiff and crunchy from protein treatments. Check to see if your conditioner has protein (it may be hidden in the ingredient list as keratin or collagen). I have to use a clarifying shampoo and then a protein-free moisturizing shampoo and conditioner. I love the momo line from davines, but there are lots of options.

    5. Is it just very dry? If so, I’ve had good results with the Oribe Signature Moisture Mask, used weekly, and the Phyto balm #7 used as needed on the ends. I really like the Phyto product over some other leave in conditioners as it actually moisturizes the hair and does not rely on silicone or dimethicone to create fake softness.

    6. Also, tell your stylist this and don’t dye your ends unless you have to. Typically you need more color from the roots, but you may be overdying the ends!

      For moisturizing conditioner, I like Nexxus Humectress and it comes in giant size at Costco inexpensively.

  11. Can someone comment on people who tuck in shirts to pants with belt loops but there is no belt as a part of the outfit? Meghan Markle has done this intentionally multiple times and I don’t understand the style.

    2. I do this because I hate the stiff feeling of a belt, it’s hard enough to find good pants without filtering out anything with loops, and typically blouse the fabric of the top over the waistband a bit to make it less obvious.

    3. Yes–can explain. If you look at MM, she is very shortwaised and leggy, and she has no waist–she’s straight up and down. Adding a belt can affect how the outfit looks visually in a way that’s not flattering, and also emphasize that you’re out of proportion. The shirt plus pants looks cleaner and doesn’t ruin the visual line.

      1. This right here. I have the same problem as a very long-waisted person who is straight up and down.

      2. This right here. I’m bigger than MM, but I have the same challenge of not really having a waist. Visible belts are not a great look.

    5. A belt is fussy, this adds a casual element to an otherwise structured look. I do it all the time.

  12. My mom is going to have a surgery that will put her hand in a cast for 6 weeks, and she lives alone a plane-ride away from me. I’ve been trying to think of what she might need during her recovery. So far, I have bras without clasps, elastic waist pants, and a jar opener. She is freezing food for herself and doesn’t normally blow dry her hair. Has anyone had a surgery like this? What did you wish you had thought of in advance? What could someone have done to help you from afar?

    1. Slip-on shoes? Grocery delivery? (because she will need SOME fresh stuff like fruits or whatever to complement the frozen foods).

    2. Whether or not it’s her dominant hand makes a big difference in recommendations. Which is it?

    3. Teach her how to use voice to text?

      Pre surgery, can she take notes on when she’s using two hands to think ahead?

    4. Had my hand in a cast for a similar amount of time in university. Biggest advice to her is to get used to asking for help. All of my friends learned pretty quickly that a certain pout meant I was having trouble zipping my parka, and I needed their help like a toddler.

      Best decision was to get my hair washed and dried at the salon twice per week. Get her a decent sized gift certificate to somewhere local to her. I could just never get my hair clean on my own one handed. On food, cutting with a knife is super challenging one handed, so focus on foods that she can eat or break apart with a fork. I also just asked restaurants to cut my food for me, and many chefs delighted in artistically plating my bite sized pieces of steak.

    5. If the cast is not waterproof, a waterproof cast cover so she can shower. Glad Cling Wrap also works.
      A bamboo knitting needle to scratch inside the cast even though they tell you a hundred times not to stick anything inside the cast. She is going to have to scratch, and a bamboo knitting needle is pretty gentle on the skin.
      Shirts that will go on and over the cast without being unbottoned.
      If she can’t use scissors with her non-casted hand, maybe something to help open things like chip bags. (I can’t operate scissors with my non-dominant hand, but maybe that’s just me.)

    6. I would set up someone to come in a once or twice week to help her with random things. Either hire someone or friends/family to stop by. They can help clean, change the lightbulb, help with laundry, shop etc… Agree with teaching her how to shop online, order take-out.

    7. I helped my friend when she broker her collarbone and one arm was immobilized. I second the rec re hair washing. She may also want someone (a friend) to stay with her or stop by–my friend needed help with buttons, zippers, carrying groceries or anything bulky or heavy, putting her hair in a pony or brushing it, and getting things out of cabinets that were high. Does your mom have a best friend who could stay for a week or so? It’s worth having a buddy, IMO.

      Separately, could you ask your work if you could work remotely as part of family caretaking? Not sure if this is possible, but this is what FMLA is for….

    9. Her hand will itch like crazy, and the cracks of the cast will reek of harsh body fat odours. If she likes them, something for her to mask the scent to herself a little when she’s going to sleep.

      Shoe horn, slip on shoes, zipper helpers, electric toothbrush, covers for her hand to shower, kitchen tongs if she hasn’t got them, a light crossbody bag like the Uniqlo half circle, some wrap tops, front-closing bras, a lovely robe, good stock of pump shampoo, pump conditioner and pump soap, pump dish soap, spray deodorant, dish washer tablets, laundry tablets (easier than opening a jar or box). Help to change her bedding.

      Easy pour olive oil, or bottle screwtop opener, some good kitchen scissors (you can cut a lot of food with scissors rather than a knife!), frozen onion, garlic, ginger, avocado and other vegetables.

  13. I just need to spread the word that apparently it’s a known thing that you can fully deleted (not resolve!) comments in a PDF that you’re editing and save it and somehow they can reappear for others.

    I did in fact just learn this the hard way and feel compelled to share for others who may find themselves in a back and forth memo war with a work enemy

    3. Not sure if it would be helpful in your case, but when I want to “flatten” a PDF, I will print it to (a new) PDF. I think this would likely remove the metadata you’re talking about. It also sometimes makes it possible to edit a locked PDF.

  14. Any thoughts on supporting a friend who needs to get a breast biopsy? Friend is an anxious-type who tends to spiral and catastrophize about things and is taking the news hard. I have already offered to take her to the procedure itself.

    1. That’s nice of you! Just let her spiral, maybe help her think through some worst case scenarios that are already happening in her head so she can process with some one else (yes, you will help her mom plan the funeral and will adopt her cat.)

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