Frugal Friday’s TPS Report: Sleeveless Dress

H + M Sleeveless Dress | Corporette

Our daily TPS reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices. This week, we welcome an old friend back to the blog — Belle from Capitol Hill Style, who was also good enough to take a week of TPS reports during my first maternity leave (and has guest posted about how to maximize a chance meeting with a VIP).

Sleeveless dresses were not allowed in my last office, so cap sleeve dresses became my go-to summer style. This H&M dress has a great neckline that would be flattering on many body types, and a sleek shape. I also love the textured fabric; it gives this basic a little something extra. The dress is $34.95 at H&M. H&M Sleeveless Dress

Seen a great piece you'd like to recommend? Please e-mail tps@corporette.com.

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162 Comments

  1. I noticed the other day when you gals were posting your make up routines, very few contained eyebrows. May I ask why? I am a brow addict, and find that good brows take a look to a whole other level of polished. Admittedly on my commute to work I will examine the eyebrows (or lack there of) on other women and wonder. Maybe you guys can enlighten me?

    1. What do you mean by good brows? Like filled in? I make sure that mine are always neatly groomed, but I’m not sure what else one should do with them. Admittedly, my makeup routine is quite minimal

    2. Tending to brows, for me, does not involve makeup, just some plucking and snipping.

      And makeup on my brows might be OK for getting pictures done, but it can look awfully theatrical, especially during the day, especially at work.

      But I am like Brooke Shields in the 80s. I’m a bit sad that they’re thinning a bit with age, but they are still very much there.

    3. Also curious to know what you mean about eyebrows. I try to keep up with mine as far as grooming them, and I might brush them if they look a little crazy, but I never thought they needed additional work. Mine are full enough and dark enough, though, that I don’t think that using an eyebrow pencil or powder to fill them in would be necessary.

      1. I mean at the very least some brow gel, so they stay where they belong during the day. But pencil or powder to fill in any sparse spots. Regular waxing/plucking and trims. Even dying/tinting them, if you dye your hair.

        1. I do this. Eyebrows are a key part of my makeup routine. But I’m also very fair so my face disappears if I don’t.

        2. Ah. Well, I would say I find eyebrows to be sort of like painting my nails regularly… it looks nice and polished, but it’s maybe a step more than I want to put in on a regular basis. I get them waxed/trimmed/tweezed when I think I need it (probably every 6-8 weeks). I don’t do brow gel…someone who waxed my brows once suggested it, but I haven’t really gotten around to buying it. I sort of think my routine is high-maintenance enough, so I don’t really want to add more to it, you know?

          1. I agree with this completely. Plus I find (on me) that if my brows are trimmed and well maintained, they don’t need gel to keep them in place.

            I also find that if your eyebrows are darker, using more product on them makes you look older (and not in a good way).

            It’s probably different for women who have lighter eyebrows though

      2. I agree with January. I have plenty of dark hair all over, including in places you don’t necessarily want it, but that also means I have full, thick eyebrows. I’ve never even considered the need to fill them in. I wax them regularly so they don’t take over my face but I don’t do anything as part of my daily routine.

    4. I pluck mine so they don’t grow all higgledly-piggledy around my face and that’s it. If by “good” you mean filled in with liner and powder etc, I just think that looks silly and overdone so I never bother with it. I think of doing brows as a bit like lip liner. I know it exists but it just seems like 7 steps more effort than I find necessary.

      1. Same. I see very few people who need to do more with their brows, but many who could stand to do less. I get my threaded occasionally, and tweeze strays in between, but that’s it. Part of my eyebrow is white but filling it in just looks strange to me.

    5. I do my eyebrows. I enhance them with a brown filler. But I wear a full face of make up and glasses a lot of the time so it is a necessity to make the face look balanced. I’m definitely not a brow expert though, it seems to be a hot topic on the beauty blogs lately!

      1. I do mine! I get them threaded regularly. … I’m a brunette and currently filing them in with a blonde anastasia pencil but wondering if I should try a darker color and a powder again. To the brow addict – What are your favorite products?

        1. I am a big fan of “The Face Shop: Design My Brows” its a flat pencil, very unique and only $4. I usually just use maybelline clear mascara to set it. I used to be a fan of the e.l.f. brow kit, but I find it takes longer, amazing results though.

          1. It can be found at The Face Shop stores or online, on The Face Shop website. Its a Korean brand that is only now expanding to new markets, so your city may not have one yet.

      2. I should also add that I’ve also had them dyed before when I was dying my hair darker. Wasn’t thrilled with the result, I prefer to use makeup on them instead.

    6. Funny you say that, because a few years ago, I always thought something was missing from my makeup that didn’t quite make me look finished & I finally realized it was my eyebrows. Even though I am dark complected, I am not hairy whatsoever so they looked way too sparse and just not polished. I now get them waxed and tweeze touch up myself and fill them in daily and it has made a HUGE difference. So much so that it is the only makeup item that I now consider an absolute daily essential. I’d pick it over anything else if I had to choose 1 thing!

      1. I agree with this sentiment and experience. I can wear less makeup overall (on days I’m rushed or just not into getting ready) and still look polished if I just add in some brow powder. I pluck stray hairs, but I think that’s enough because I’m blessed with well behaved brows (and fuller brows are “in”). On “light” makeup days I wear concealer (benefit), brow powder (benefit), mascara (drugstore whatever), and smashbox press powder.

      2. Yes. This. I’m fair-skinned but have the same approach. IMO it looks better on my minimal-makeup face to have great, nicely-defined brows.

    7. Mine are dark and reasonably full so they just need some plucking and trimming. They aren’t so long that I need to gel them, they stay in the same place always.

    8. I didn’t post the other day, but I do fill in/ darken my brows with a brow pencil because they’re very blonde (much lighter than my hair) and, like you, I think I look better with noticeable brows. I would guess that a lot of women don’t apply makeup to their brows because 1) their brows are already thick/filled in enough or 2) they just don’t care or think it makes enough of a difference to worry about. I would say filling in my brows is definitely the longest step of my routine and I wear a full face of makeup daily. It’s time consuming, easy to mess up if you’re not familiar with it, and the payoff just isn’t worth it for many. It also seems like filling in your brows is a more recent trend that perhaps gained popularity with the revival of the bold eyebrows trend.

      I do find your concern that other women don’t do more with brows troubling though. The notion that women need full, thick brows just sets one more beauty standard that is just not natural for many women and you seem to be perpetuating this unrealistic idea of beauty.

      1. Huh. I find filling my brows super easy, takes like 30 seconds. I use a sephora brow brush and anastasia powder, that’s it.

        (Note, I only do this about 25% of the time and never did it before last year, when the sephora girl showed me how I looked with them filled in.)

        1. Since my eyebrow hair is so blonde, I have to completely fill them in with a pencil, which takes a bit more time that just filling in the sparse spots. I’d say it probably takes me at least a minute on a quick day, which is definitely longer than any other step in my makeup routine.

    9. My eyebrows are pretty sparse and don’t need much maintenance. I do usually use a Shu Umera gel (discontinued unfortunately) to fill them in.

    10. If my brows are waxed/plucked then I don’t need to do anything to them. They stay in place. I may need to fill them in for professional photographs because of the flash hitting my brow bone but otherwise I don’t do anything with them on a daily basis.

    11. My eyebrows are so full and jet black that I am at the other end of the spectrum. I get it threaded/waxed every 2 weeks to make them look neat. That’s about the only maintenance I do for my brows.

    12. I didn’t post my make-up routine, but I definitely do my eyebrows (I have a darling little kit from Sephora that has light/dark powder, wax and brushes). I have dark, waxed/trimmed eyebrows but fair skin, so filling in my eyebrows with powder stops my fair skin from showing through the dark hairs and makes my eyebrows look more committed to being on my face, and brings more focus to my eyes.

      Until about a year ago I definitely thought filling in brows was too much work, but I find it really quick and really impactful.

      If I am wearing only concealer and mascara on the weekends, I still do my brows.

      1. “makes my eyebrows look more committed to being on my face”
        :-) great way of putting it!

    13. I use Anastasia powder to fill in. As long as I use the lighter color on fullest part of my brows near my nose, it doesn’t have that overdone look. For an extra oomph and staying power, I’ll use the Nars gel. I love the way it looks.

    14. In the context of this discussion, I found it interesting to look at the eyebrows of the photoshopped images in the link someone shared below. Some of the photoshoppers had cleaned up stray hairs around her eyebrows, others had darkened her eyebrows and so on.
      I haven’t paid too much attention to my eyebrows in the past, but I can certainly see what a big difference they can make to the overall look.

      1. I agree that filling in the brows adds a nice finishing touch. I use the Clinique brow powder. I found it easier to use than pencil. The powder looks more natural.

  2. When you were first year associates, how many hours did you bill? How many were you expected to bill? We have a 2000 target but have been repeatedly assured that we won’t be penalized for not hitting it our first year. However, I’m wondering just how far below is expected… I’m currently 200 hours behind, and it’s freaking me out. But there just hasn’t been much work, and I’ve done a lot of non-billable stuff. I’m in Biglaw, not NYC.

    1. I have a 1800 target. 2000 does not sound fun. Are you 200 below for the last 6 months, or are you 100 below target, so if you keep this pace, you will be 200 under your target by year end?

      I haven’t seen any first years penalized for not making target any any firms. You likely will not get a bonus though.

      1. In my first full year, I didn’t get a raise since I was about 75 hours below target. In my first partial year (August-December), they didn’t prorate correctly (they expected a full month for August when I started on August 13) and they noted that I missed my hours. And this is why I’m at a new firm.

        Anyway, current firm requires 2150 hours and the pace is harder than I expected since I’ve had two terrible colds and a stomach virus in the last month and a half. Disappointed with my current pace. Ugh.

        1. 2150 hour requirement? I’ve never heard of such a high requirement before. Does this include non-billable stuff as well?

    2. unless there are other first years that have significantly more hours than you do (like you’re 100 or more behind their pace), coming in at 1800 is awesome for a first year. (If you mean that you’re on a 1600 pace, that’s actually not awful either – I think I billed 1100 or so my first year, though my first year was also 2009.)

    3. It really depends on the pace of the other first years or the work load of your group/firm. If you have a partner mentor (most firms assign them these days, I think) ask. Or better, as the partner you most frequently work with. They’ll appreciate your concern (or should).

    4. What’s your billable year? Our first years start a couple months into our billable year, so I would not expect any of them to hit it the first year and would expect them to be 300-400 hours off at least. Even leaving that aside, there’s a lot of ramp up. Unless you are only a month or two into your billable year, 200 hours under sounds totally reasonable. Do you have an older associate or a partner you trust that you can ask? I’d be fine having that conversation with any worried first year.

    5. I’m very interested in this thread mainly because it’s giving me some perspective on my current situation. I’m billing about 200/month (NYC BigLaw), which works out to 2400 a year, and I was recently told that I am not billing enough, my hours are considered “low” in the department, and I should aim for 250-300/month (or 3000-3600/year). I was told that I am not considered “at capacity” and will be given new cases until I start billing at least 250/month. Don’t worry, I’m currently looking for a new job, because this place is INSANE. Please continue to post your hours and give me some perspective that I am not lazy for billing 2400…which to me feels pretty darn busy.

      1. yes, that is INSANE. my high water mark year to date has been 2350 (of a 2000 target), and that was even including two full week vacations in the FY. Typical years come in between 2100-2200, which feels busy but at least sustainable.

      2. Yikes. You would be a couple hundred hours above the highest billing associates in my midwestern BigLaw firm. We would be telling you to stop working so hard because you were going to burn out.

      3. This is crazy.

        I would question if there are more than 200 “good” hours in any month. My clients wouldn’t want someone like this doing their work — at a certain point, quality takes a back seat. Your firm is serving its equity partners better than it is serving its clients.

        1. This is what I always think – how good is a lawyer who has had a total of ten hours’ sleep in the last week and can barely spell their own name, yet is churning out loan agreements at 4am?

          I mean sure, there are busy periods and I’ve done my share of all-nighters, but at some point you just have to stop or you will be negligent.

          Unfortunately law firms aren’t being called out by clients who just want their stuff now-now-now and until they are (or someone gets a massive fine from the regulators), nothing will change.

      4. I’ve never billed over 250 a month. My highest billing month ever was 222, followed by a 220, but then I had a couple of 6-7 hour days in there so I suppose I still technically had some capacity.

        *rolls eyes*

        Sadly as I understand it, what you’re describing is not atypical in NYCBL so well done for looking to get out.

      5. Wow. That’s insane. You are not lazy you are just working at the wrong firm. 2000 hours per year is hard enough.

      6. Anytime I’ve billed more than 225 hrs (billable) a month, I am very tired, because 225 billables is more like 250-275 if you’re working at ~82% billable. Regularly looking for 250-300 is Cravath-style, not sleeping, all-nighters, depression-inducing.

        I am sure you’re not getting paid more (biglaw) than other shops for working that hard, unless you’re at Wachtell…lateral. Quick. Sounds like you’re already on it….

    1. I saw some of these pictures on Yahoo last night and the comments were interesting. It was only the American photoshoppers who has changed her features so much that she was unrecognizable. All other countries just applied some make up, added clothing, jewelry etc. May be it says something about the beauty standards here.

      1. I thought the USA ones were creepy, but I thought the Philippines and India were the most drastically different.

        1. The USA one was creepy. It made her look like a child.

          The whole series was very interesting.

          1. The biggest conclusion I drew from the photos was that Americans (and some other countries) are REALLY bad at Photoshop. I thought the project was a clever concept though and it was interesting to see the differences in the examples that were more skillfully done.

    2. It is interesting to see how opinions on beauty vary throughout different parts of the world. As she stated herself, some of the freelancers were amateurs and it really shows so it’s hard to really know whether they’ve actually changed her to meet their standard of beauty or not. I think it would be interesting to send the image to top fashion magazines in various countries and ask them to change the image to meet their beauty ideals. That might be a more accurate portrayal of how it varies.

    3. The Germany one, IMHO, made her look like a character from a Victorian-era painting.

  3. This dress looks nice for the price. I wish our interns would buy dresses like this instead of their F21 getups.

  4. Now if only H&M dresses would ever actually be this long on me. Everything I try on there is mid-thigh AT BEST, so it is a “tops only” store for me.

    1. Cosign. And I have the world’s shortest torso and really long legs, so I look even more special in super-short dresses than “normal-height” people do. Urgh. Not a fan of all the short dresses the past few seasons, which are not even club-worthy for me!

  5. I love this dress. Great picks this week, Belle!

    It has an exposed zipper, which I really don’t like but I might give it a shot anyway. There isn’t a picture from the back on their site. How does H&M sizing run compared to someplace like J Crew? This comes in XS-L. Is a L closer to a 12 or closer to a 14?

    1. If you click on the red version, the second pic down shows the exposed zipper.

      I haven’t worn H&M in awhile, but my recollection is that it runs very small, so a L would def be closer to a 10/12.

  6. I saw some of these pictures on Yahoo last night and the comments were interesting. It was only the American photoshoppers who has changed her features so much that she was unrecognizable. All other countries just applied some make up, added clothing, jewelry etc. May be it says something about the beauty standards here.

  7. Does anyone have info on how this dress holds up? My problem with stuff from H&M or OldNavy and the like is that serious pilling and other problems of poor workmanship/quality always seem to show up after 1-2 wears, which means, while Frugal, it’s also sort of disposable.

  8. I need some advice on managing a summer student – how much guidance should I give them? I have a very enthusiastic (male) summer student who does good work but has no filter. He has told the office about the multiple girls he sees at one time, why he is so excited to leave early today to go and do X… his stories are unfortunately getting around and I’m pretty sure he is only going to be remembered for these exploits.

    I don’t think that the current situation be mitigated at this point but should I have a quiet conversation with him about impressions made in the office for future jobs? I’ve offered him some other advice previously and am not sure he really took it to heart.

    1. I hate to say it, but if he didn’t take other advice to heart, he won’t listen to advice to shut his trap, either.

    2. I would say things directly to him when he says the inappropriate things. Since he has no filter I don’t think a side conversation will do the trick, but this is a great learning opportunity for a student. Like, actually say “That’s not a work appropriate topic” when he talks about inappropriate things.

      1. +1, just address it frankly. I had a younger new hire try to hug me once. We were friendly outside of work, but I had to say “I’m sorry I don’t hug at work!”.

    3. As a current summer, I would really appreciate any feedback regarding my performance or behavior. I would tell him and if he doesn’t adjust accordingly, at least he will know why he wasn’t brought back after the summer

    4. This is tricky given that he is talking about dating. Being a female supervisor I would tread very lightly in this area and perhaps talk to HR about the issue to vet what can be said without causing any issues for you.

  9. Someone who has been awful to me for years is currently having a wardrobe malfunction. I don’t think she is aware of it and it would be easy to fix.

    She has been really awful.

    What would you do?

    1. If its an easy fix, I’d tell her. Being awful back just continues the cycle. Besides, karma is a witch – no matter how much you dislike her, wouldn’t you want her to let you know?

    2. She’ll still be embarrassed if you tell her but you’ll be being a bigger person. That’s a win/win in my book.

  10. Need some shoe advice and suggestions-
    Because I am terrible and coordinating, I generally try to keep my wardrobe only to black/charcoal/tan as neutrals, and phased out of most of my navy & dark brown so I didn’t have to think so hard about coordinating shoes and accessories with them. However, I have a couple of dresses that are in browns that I would like to wear to more casual functions or work that I don’t have shoes for (I have heels, but I can’t wear them to walk any extended distance, and I don’t really want to learn)

    What color shoes would you buy to be most versatile and go with a brown/tan/cream dress in a casual setting? Preferably flats or hidden wedge, and ideally something that I could wear with some of my other dresses (like solid black or black and white print). I was originally thinking nude, but the problem with that is that I don’t really like the tan-ish nude shoes, and true nude-for-me is a lot closer to ivory.

    I was thinking maybe red or light pink might be a better “neutral” than nude for me, but I don’t know. Any suggestions? Bonus for links to actual shoes!

      1. Sorry, I totally failed on your request to avoid heels. However, I still think that color is a nice basic neutral.

    1. Do you already own something charcoal? Gray always feels like a good neutral with creams and browns to me. Otherwise, I agree with the nude or something in a bright color, like red or coral.

    2. What about a patterned shoe in neutrals? I have a pair of brown/gray/tan snakeskin shoes from Cole Haan that seem to match just about everything.

  11. I wanted to say thanks to the OP and responders who recommended summer book reads yesterday. I love reading but haven’t made time for myself to do so recently– I am so excited to download many of these books on Kindle!

    1. Me too! Have a few days holiday planned in July and I am going to go and lay under a tree (weather permitting, this is Scotland) with a book.

  12. This feels like a silly question, but I can’t seem to find the answer on the internet…. what does “law and motion department” usually mean at a law firm? I’ve been working for a sole practitioner and am now interviewing with a larger (but still smallish– less than 50 attorneys) firm which has several attorneys listed as being in the law and motion department. This sounds appealing to me (I’m a litigator who doesn’t particularly enjoy trials), but I am wondering if it signifies lower pay/lower growth potential? Do “law and motion” attorneys typically argue the motions or only do research and writing? Is this a term that means something different at different firms? Obviously I will find out more at the interview, but I am wondering what the general perception is. Thanks!

    1. I don’t know exactly, but my guess is that it would really be the research and writing aspect of litigation and not the courtroom / deposition aspect.

  13. This might get me thrown into moderation, but does anyone have any favorite “no show” non-thong undies?

      1. I’ll second all the Soma Vanishing Edge recommendations. I used to wear !hongs every day, but I wear the soma hipsters almost every day now.

    1. Lululemon no seam hipsters and their knock off at Target. I think the Target is Gillian OMalley seamless hipster.

    2. Naomi & Nicole – can be found @ Macy’s and Kohl’s. I prefer the lace front hipster as I’m long-waisted and the high cut briefs do not go up high enough for me.

    1. I really liked this. And I love Belle, for being a fashion blogger (and a slim one at that) who actually remembers that women of other sizes exist (and want clothes). As much as I love Kat, she doesn’t even point out when her choices actually come in plus sizes all the time anymore, let alone actually think of us on the front end. (It wasn’t always like this. Kat posted lots of things that worked for me and lots of other sizes in the beginning. To be fair to her, I think those choices are also dwindling in the market.)

    2. yes – totally agree. I’ve gradually whittled down the types of items I’ll even consider buying from them (first the merino sweaters went, then the cashmere, then the t-shirts, and now the Jackies (a longtime favorite of mine, but the cotton doesn’t hold up very well anymore and the sizing is wildly inconsistent – quality control problems). The only things I’m now willing to purchase are shoes, pants, casual dresses, button-front shirts, and swimwear, and even then, only when they’re on sale and at least another 30-40% off of that price (as Belle notes). I also have items from the 2003-2005 era that are still in regular rotation and holding up well, while items from 2 years ago are in the donation pile.

      1. I agree. I’ve been sitting on a gift card to JCrew I received over a year ago, because very little in the store appeals to me. The suiting cuts aren’t as nice, the sweaters pill after a few wears, and everything else isn’t worth considering unless deeply discounted.

        1. If you can’t bring yourself to use the gift card, I’ll take it! What about spending it on small accessories, flipflops, etc?

    3. Her rant hits so many nails squarely on their heads…and applies to many more lines than J.Crew (which has always, even its petites, been for taller women than me). Because they frequently have cropped jacket styles and petites, AT has always been my go-to for suiting. But the quality has gone down the toilet, and the sizing is completely out of whack. I’m still 10+lbs over my pre-pregnancy weight, and I’m already starting to fit into new clothing that is my pre-pregnancy size (even though I can’t yet wear my pre-pregnancy pants). How is anyone supposed to shop?!! I exact my revenge by ordering 4+ sizes of everything (since most retailers can’t even be bothered to stock my size in the store) and then return whatever doesn’t fit. I’m not sure who wins in this situation, though ;)

    4. In case any one from J Crew finds this thread: I too have completely stopped buying J Crew stuff. It disintegrates after 1-3 wears.

    5. Okay, I am with you all, both in terms of quality and the sizing issue. But J Crew has been on an out-of-control-styling jag for a LONG time. I am thinking back to a blog or whatever they called it in the early days of the 2000s that was nothing but preposterous JC catalog pics.

      1. I know a lot of people much more “fashionable” than me go gaga over Jenna Lyons, but I think that woman looks like a hot mess most of the time, and her leadership is a big reason why J. Crew has drifted so far from its wonderfully classic roots.

  14. I’m not sure I understand Belle’s comment that it would work in her office with a no-sleeveless policy; it is literally called “Sleeveless dress.”

    1. True, but the shoulders are covered. I would call it more of a cap-sleeve than a true sleeveless style.

      1. Yeah but I think if you plucked the average boss off the street, especially a male one, he would have no idea what you’re talking about. I don’t think the type of place that imposes a “no sleeveless” policy is especially concerned with that one inch of shoulder. They want sleeves. But, then again, maybe not, if this kind of dress would fly.

        1. I agree – if the office actually cares about lack of sleeves, I don’t think that this would cut it. At best, you would be doing the “I’m not touching you” thing of being so just barely in line with the rules that you’re even more annoying than a real violater.

          I like this dress, though, and it would be great if your office doesn’t have a no-sleeveless rule, but you’re just not super-comfortable without sleeves at work (i.e., me).

        2. I agree. I personally wouldn’t wear this dress (at least not without a jacket) for that reason, but there’s definitely offices where it would be just fine.

    1. Honestly, your weight could very well fluctuate that much from day to day. I wouldn’t worry about it, but if you are, try using your lunch break to walk around the block a few times.

        1. I would try that, and also just try to get some other movement into your day. I get off my bus a stop earlier than I could and get some extra walking in that way. I use a printer that is not the closest one to my office, I get off the elevator 2 floors down and walk up to my office in the morning and after lunch. I get out for a lunch time walk.

    2. You can gain or lose 3 pounds in a day based on what you eat/excrete/drink/retain. I wouldn’t worry about it.

    3. These comments always make me really confused because I can gain / lose 3 lbs based on something like whether or not I ate Chinese takeout for dinner the night before. Do people step on the scale and it says the same number every time? I have about a three pound range based on a lot of factors…

      1. I’m with you. Maybe my scale is inaccurate or super sensitive, but my weight fluctuates +/-3 lbs throughout the day.

      2. I think that’s true if you are just randomly weighing yourself, but I can usually tell if my weight change is random fluctuations or actual weight gain by weighing myself at the same time of day and also noting if the number is always the same or higher. In other words, has my average weight shifted up? Then again, I”m super short and small-framed, so 3lbs on me is equivalent to a lot more on taller people. My water weight fluctuations are more like a lb.

      3. This comment is a troll comment, designed to poke fun at whichever poster this week was upset about gaining 10 lbs and all of their clothes being too tight as a result. The troll is then going to submit this post to the STFU site because they need Tumblr and the woman who runs that blog to acknowledge how clever/funny they think they are being.

        I can practically hear them giggling about all of the sincere responses from here.

      4. Well, I’ll bite and say that I’m one of those whose weight doesn’t fluctuate by much at all. I don’t weigh myself at home, but whenever I go to the doctor (average of maybe once every three months) I’ve weighed the exact same, plus or minus about 1 pound (usually not even that), for the last several years.

        The only exception was when I was pregnant, I gained some 25-30 pounds and later went back down again to what I’ve realized is my ‘baseline’ weight – which was the exact number as pre-pregnancy (doctor’s records), and it’s stayed the same since then.
        I don’t think the doc is rigging the scale. :)

    4. Can someone please explain why a mother posing a question in any way related to mothering gets flamed here, but somehow it’s OK to use this forum as a personal weight diary? Seriously, do we need a separate “Weight Issues” blog now too? This wasn’t a comment, a question, a request for commiseration, anything. Just a random update about much an unknown person happens to weigh today!

      1. I’m of the view that these threads are open for anyone to ask any question or discuss any topic as they have been since I started reading in spring 2010. I just scroll past what I am not interested in and often look back to see if there is any update on a conversation I was interested in.

        1. Yep, agreed. This place is an open forum for whatever. I’ve been reading since 2009 and it’s always been that way. In fact, that’s the only reason I read the blog.

        2. +1 People express their concerns on this forum, and get suggestions in response, and I don’t see this post as any different.

      2. Commenters here have decided that those who are bothered or triggered by talk of numbers–whether weight or size–are oversensitive and should just stay off the internet.

        Times have changed since the days of Shayna.

        1. We have a new Shayna. Her name is Wildkitten; she has something to say about absolutely everything. Even if it’s nothing.

          1. Please…this isn’t nice. How is Wildkitten going to feel when she reads this? How would you feel if somebody made similar (dismissive) comments about Babs? Yes, these are pseudonyms, but behind them are real, live people .

  15. I received a thank you gift from a coworker’s wife for something that I did a while back. We’ve never met and it was totally unnecessary but very sweet and she included a lovely note about how much what I did meant to her. I thanked my coworker and told him to please thank his wife. Should I also write her a note? I know you don’t normally thank people for thank you’s, but it also kind of feel appropriate here?

    1. I think your first instinct is correct – I wouldn’t send a thank-you note for a thank-you gift, however touching, and in any event, you also thanked her through her husband.

      1. I love the thank you spiral of doom! I probably wouldn’t do it here, but some of my friends and family like to kind of jokingly send thank you cards back and forth.

    2. Can you share what you did that was so touching that someone you’ve never met wrote you a note to say how much it meant to her?!
      I agree with the responses but if you really, really, want to maybe you could write her a “you’re welcome” email or something!

      1. Thanks all! You are probably right – thank you spiral of doom avoided! I was thrown off by the fact that she sent me a gift but I think just sincerely thanking my coworker and letting him pass on the message was probably enough.

        @Samantha: I really didn’t do anything special. I subscribe to the New Yorker and would often leave my magazines at work and my coworker would sometimes take them home after I was done because his wife liked reading them. So when it was time for me to renew my subscription and I got offered a free gift subscription for a friend, I sent it to his wife because I thought she’d enjoy it. And she wrote me a very sweet note about how she much she likes getting them every week and how it brings back all these memories for her of being young and in the city, when she would read every issue cover to cover. It was a very lovely note.

  16. Where do people like to buy pants that are not denim but not are necessarily part of a suit either?
    I’ve never been a fan of khakis (too many ill-fitting school uniforms in my past), and I currently wear mostly jeans, thicker ponte pants (not leggings) or casual dresses day-to-day, or pencil skirts/sheath dresses if I have a meeting, but I start a new job in a few weeks that is no jeans, more khakis and polo/button-down for men type of place -but not a suit environment at all. I didn’t interview with or see any women when I was there so I can’t go off that yet, but I have a feeling it will involve a step up from my current leg-wear. I have a pair of cropped wool pants from jcrew, and a pair of cotton crops from club monaco, but no “real” pants! I prefer to machine wash over dry-clean, but I don’t mind fussy wash/dry instructions. Pear shaped and long-legged, which is a big part of how I got into this no-pants situation.
    PS. I’m not new to the workforce, I’ve just always been in very casual offices and need to make the leap to business casual.

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