Suit of the Week: J.Crew Factory

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1. My teen is looking for vivid glittery eye shadow. No subtle color, buildable color, or soft tones for contouring. Think: trashy and opaque and bright.

   She is getting frustrated with drugstore picks and our Sephora is a hot mess. What should we be going for?

   I’m no help (sunscreen + spackle is how I roll, with some eyebrow help).

   1. If Walmart doesn’t have it right now for Halloween, it doesn’t exist.

   2. Morphe ones are great and highly pigmented. So are Kat Von D brand.

      1. +1

   3. Try Ulta

   4. My niece is into cosplay and swears by Colourpop, Morphe, and Danessa Myricks for highly pigmented eye makeup. The first two are at Ulta, and Danessa Myricks is at Sephora.

   5. NYX has a vivid palette called ” I Know That’s Bright”, that one might work.

      Jeffrey Star and Morphe can also work.

      Have her watch Angelica Nyqvist on youtube, she has great reviews of indie makeup she and uses very bright and unsubtle colors, with beautiful lime green, orange, blue etc

   6. I have a really good purple one from Elf – it’s a liquid eyeshadow. Otherwise Google whatever palettes they use in Euphoria.

   7. urban decay – https://www.urbandecay.com/urban-decay-eyeshadow-singles-24-7-shadow/ud1053.html?dwvar_ud1053_color=SET%20LIST

   8. I used to love using a paint-pot cream style of gold eyeshadow for dramatic color. Would recommend maybelline color tattoo in Gold Rush if they still make it!

   9. Half-Magic Beauty. Sold at Ulta

   10. MAC was always really good for this, as their pigments are high quality. If they don’t have a glittery eyeshadow, try a vivid solid color then add glitter. Sounds fun!

   11. Stila glitter and glow, Pat McGrath, violet voss. If you’re lucky, you can find at Marshall’s and TJ Maxx.

2. In the last week I’ve received 5 letters from 5 banks saying that my credit card applications are denied. Surprise! I didn’t attempt to open any credit cards. Interestingly, they were all attempted opened in my maiden name, which I’ve not used in over 15 years.

   My credit is frozen, so thank god for that. I called all the banks and reported them as fraudulent applications. What other steps should I be taking? I’ve changed all passwords and have very complex passwords. I already check my credit card statements and all financial accounts frequently (probably more frequently than the typical person). Is that all I can really do? Is freezing credit enough? I’ve had DH do the same just to be extra cautious.

   I just assume we’re all the victims of having information stolen via data breaches by now so I’m not getting overly worked up but I just want to be pragmatic about taking protective steps.

   1. I think you can set up an online account with the social security SSA.gov, to make sure nobody else does it with your information, and to receive information via email instead of mail. I feel like I have to move on instinctively from thinking snail mail is always more secure. There was a news story about mail stolen from a USPS truck and everyone just shrugged and said that happens all the time, it just made slightly more waves because the mail probably contained ballots!

      1. So much mail was getting stolen from the mailbox on the corner next to my in laws building that they got rid of the mailbox. The building is full of old people who still pay their bills by putting checks in the mail. They are out $10k and their bank is being really unhelpful. I no longer trust the mail for anything important (sadly).

   2. When I had a similar problem, I filed a police report (useless, but at least at that time, you had to in order for the credit reporting agencies to take your FTC identity theft affidavit seriously). I then submitted the FTC affidavit to all of the credit agencies and told them to put a statement on my account to the effect of: “I’ve been a victim of identity theft. Do not issue credit to anyone claiming to be Digby Jones (current name) or Digby Smith (former name), without verifying with me first.” Who knows if credit issuers take the extra seconds to review statements like this, but at least I did what I could to alert them. If they issue credit to a scammer then come after me (which is what happened), I can now point to that statement on my account and say “Go suck it, Equifax.” (They were the absolute worst to deal with.)

   3. Freezing your credit is a start, but not enough. There is a sub-Reddit called r/IdentityTheft, and pinned to the top is information about Identification Recovery 101 and Freezing Your Credit Reports is not enough. For example, you need to freeze ChexSystems for opening bank accounts, and NCTUE for utilities and telecom.

      The Consumer Protection Financial Bureau publishes a list of “reporting agencies.” I am not sure it’s even possible to freeze everything, I’ve not been able to but just focus on the ones that highlighted as important.

      1. thank you

3. Who has a good organizing system for office bits and bobs? I have about eight different places where I keep things like paperclips, extra paper, binders — but also extra chargers and wall taps and things like stamps and printer ink. I need to consolidate, trash, and organize I think.

   1. I have hardly any bits and bobs anymore – do you still use paperclips and paper?

      1. for paperclips I realized I needed some today for a hobby project (seed envelopes) and had no idea where I’d have to dig for them. I think that’s the thing i have so much junk I never use mixed in with stuff I might need that I need to just organize.
         we use binder clips frequently for chip clips
         I’m always hunting for new iphone cords or whatever but they’re always a tangled mess with cords I haven’t needed since like 2011.

         1. I have a desk where all that stuff goes. paperclips, pens, sharpies, stapler, post-its, rubber bands, batteries, envelopes, cards, ruler, binder clips, tech cords, paper, etc. If I didn’t have a desk, I’d use a plastic tote or designate a kitchen drawer/cabinet as an “office/toolchest” location.

            And a “Yes,” to getting all your stuff in one place and getting rid of the stuff you never use.

         2. For cords, we have all cords in ziplock bags. My husband coils them properly and puts twisty ties on them. If we do not KNOW what the cord is for (like, 100% certainty, no “I think this goes with that external battery…”), we chuck it. If we need the cord, Amazon will have the replacement. We don’t have enough cords to need to label them, but YMMV.

            Digital camera cords are kept in the digital camera bag and similar — this is for cords that don’t have a natural home.

   2. I have a shelf in a cupboard where I keep a couple of boxes with lids where I store the office stuff that’s not in daily use, or the extras. I don’t organize beyond keeping it in the dedicated office box. My printer lives on that shelf as well. Extra chargers and electronic bits and bobs are in a small, dedicated drawer. Extra paper on top of the printer on the shelf, specialty paper and envelopes in a small, dedicated drawer.

   3. I have two small boxes that live on my bookshelf. One is — “it’s small and what if I need it someday” — and the other is stuff I actually use occasionally, like pens, mini stapler, post its, paperclips, and stamps. There’s a decorative cup next to it with a few pens and pencils. I keep my notepads and stationary right there too, and when I (rare) have something paper-like I need to actually keep for a while, I put it there (like birthday cards not ready to be mailed).
      I do not have a desk at home or a printer (and rarely wfh).

      We also have a “tech drawer” in the credenza in our living room. Ipads, kindles, switch, and the family laptop all live in there when not in use. All the associated cords are in there. Aspirationally, they are rolled up and placed in an apple ipad box (open), but in reality they are just a tangle.

   4. I just have a few small bins for all that stuff. I don’t really use it much either, but still need it just often enough that I need to have some around- I never use paper clips as paper clips, but need them a few times a year to reset various electronic devices, I print something once every month or two and mail things somewhat more frequently than that, use post-its occasionally when a physical reminder is helpful, etc. I don’t use binder clips, though, and just have a little bin of clothes pins in the kitchen for closing bags. I also have a battery bin and a bin for chargers of various kinds.

   5. For hobby things I bought the plastic (poly -something) stackable boxes

      For my desk I bought a white table top organizer from Target. Honestly target had a lot of good options.

      I also got a “Wrap-It 28pk Cord Holder and Desk Cord Organizer Cable Clips Black” to keep cords organized instead of all of over the place

   6. This is a fancy solution but I have an antique apothecary type chest in my office with little drawers for these things. I use binder clips in both my office and my kitchen all the time so I like to know where they are.

      The regular paper clips I don’t use much but I always end up with a stash of them, so those sit in a magnetic Darth Vader paper clip dispenser (he’s handing me one, his hand is a magnet) from Hallmark several years ago. Seriously.

4. Another office supply question – what is a good headset for Teams/Zoom meetings? My old one broke and I’ve only got my kids’ gaming headsets.

   1. I have a corded platting a one I like better than my wireless planteomics one. It does a good job of canceling the exterior noise in the background but it does bit noise cancel the surrounding noise for me.

      1. Wow. Plantronics**

         It’s the corded one with the red cord on Amazon.

         There are a gazillion better options but I use this one daily in a small office with 5 other people and am happy with it.

5. I’ve been thinking about the poster from this morning whose husband has fallen for two financial scams and has believed disinformation. My mind immediately went to the way social media algorithms push right wing topics and disinformation to anyone with bro-coded interests. Like somehow, there’s a clear path from keto to crypto. I don’t know what the solution is, but it’s troubling.

   1. Just wanted to add that I have no idea if this plays any role in the OP’s situation. It’s just where I went after reading her post.

      1. +1 – there’s something to this. Does the OP’s DH listen to Joe Rogan?

   2. +1 I am seeing a lot of other people in my otherwise well-educated well-meaning expanded social/friends circle repeat right-wing points as if they are facts. I still try my best to push back, educate etc but am THIS close to giving up on it all.

   3. Disinformation like what? The John Kelly thing has already blown up and been thoroughly debunked, and that didn’t stop the Vice President from making an official press announcement. Literally, disinformation promulgated from behind a seal of the United States.

      1. Oh, please: ivermectin, bleach, etc.

      2. Believing one person over another isn’t “debunking”

      3. Right here is an example of someone who falls for disinformation.

   4. I think people have a need to believe things and belong to groups. If we lose faith in things like the media, govt, medicine, something else will just replace it. Even if the something else is, “you can’t believe anyone or anything so i think it’s all a simulation”.

6. Help me. I am traveling to back to back work conferences in different countries with temps ranging from 46 to 80 degrees. Have given up on carry-on only packing but curious:
   1. how many shoes would u pack? what types? i need to account for formal, casual and weather. Could rain but not typically rainy weather.
   2. can i get away with one outer jacket? what type?
   3. planning to repeat actual presentation/conference outfits: silk/polyester basic dresses with and without leggings but REALLY struggling with pants. WWYD?

   1. Warm weather pants with long underwear/tights for the cooler destination?

      1. You don’t need long underwear in 46 degrees.

         1. This! Unless she means a high of 46, which could mean lows in the 20s or so. But the temperature fluctuating between 46-80 is not that big a temperature range — that’s a very standard daily variation this time of year in the Midwest or New England. Wear short sleeves and bring a jacket for chilly mornings and late evenings.

         2. YMMV. I’ve worn my silk long underwear in Paris this week in temps in the 50s and been happy to have it.

   2. I would pack – 2 pairs of shoes that go with your conference outfits (loafers or flats), one pair flip flops, one pair sneakers; wear the sneakers on the plane and treat with waterproofing spray before travel.

      For coat I would go with something squishable like a Patagonia Nanopuff.

      Why are you struggling with pants? The same pair of basic black pants could cover at least 2 days IMHO.

   3. I like ponte pants for travel as they don’t tend to wrinkle and are stretchy.

   4. How much time will you be outdoors and what activities outdoors do you need to accommodate?

      This time of year that temperature range is a daily spread where I am. I don’t bother with a coat just for walking from my car to the building unblock it is significantly colder. I do wear seasonal fabrics (wool blazer rather than linen, etc.).

   5. Dresses with leggings feels a little casual to me for a conference, but you likely know your industry. I would not do dresses + leggings for a presentation, I’d do hose or tights if you run cold. Leggings under dresses is a very knockabout/running errands/threw these on because I’m cold look rather than polished and professional to me personally.

      For multi day trips under a week, I typically pack four pairs of shoes (wearing the heaviest/bulkiest on the plane): one walking shoe, one indoor slipper/sandal shoe for walking around the hotel room or whatnot, one fancy going out shoe, and one simple comfortable shoe for everyday. In practice, it’s likely a sneaker or boot, a flip flop or shower slide, a pump/strappy sandal and a mule or loafer.

      For pants, I’d pack one neutral lightweight wool cropped or ankle and one trouser in a color or pattern to mix it up.

      Jacket you might need at least two–one colder weather wool blazer or similar and one lightweight like a denim or canvas but a 3-season oversized wool blazer might do for both trips.

      Something that really helped me is planning it all out visually. I copy-paste stock images of the items I am planning on bringing on a blank page (powerpoint, canva, etc) and then plan my outfits from my pieces. It helps me immediately see what I’m missing (tops, purses, jewelry) or if things are mismatched in some way or not working. I’ve done this for all my trips in the last couple years after several trips in a row where I under-packed or packed the wrong thing, and promised I wouldn’t do that to myself again.

7. My dentist asked if I clench my teeth and I think he might be right. I will mention it at my upcoming appointment but I wonder how others deal. Depending on my work stress, I definitely have tension in my jaw. I’m trying to do more stretching, and I tried a generic mouth guard from target but it felt weird. Any other things I should look into?

   1. The only solution for me was to decrease my stress by finding a different job. I tried a custom nightguard from my dentist, but I cracked it in two. It’s been 8 years, but I’ve started clenching again. A couple of days ago, I set a goal to apply to 3 jobs by the end of the year.

   2. An actual mouth guard fitted to your teeth that you get from the dentist. There are ones that cover your whole top (or bottom), or small ones that sit at the front of your mouth. Clenching can wear away teeth and cause gum recession. My dentist told me to even wear it during the day if I find I’m clenching. That might be too much at work, but is certainly one solution

   3. The only good OTC mouthguard I know is SOVA (or maybe if there are similar ones to SOVA). The kind where you mold it yourself. That’s what my dentist had me use.

      A B complex and a high absorption magnesium supplement help me generally with stress. Apparently magnesium discourages muscle tension. That would be something to discuss w/PCP probably more than dentist.

      1. Oh and my dentist offers Botox for this, but I’m not a candidate. But apparently it really helps some people break the habit.

   4. I have a night guard from the dentist and I have Acupuncture every 3-4 weeks. The Acupuncture has helped a lot, and it may not be necessary for you to go that often, the four week cadence works best for me. Acupuncture may seem expensive, but clenching your teeth will eventually ruin them.

   5. Don’t waste any more money on over the counter stuff. It’s never going to fit well and you won’t use it. Get a custom one from your dentist. That is something you’ll actually use and it will save you money in the long run.

      1. I threw out the custom one from the dentist. It cost $$$ and “fit well” but it was so uncomfortable and made of such unpleasant materials I could never sleep in it. I wouldn’t invest without seeing a sample.

   6. Certain antidepressants make you grind your teeth. Other drugs might too. In case that’s a concern. I have to wear a custom mouthguard for my grinding.

   7. Retainer that is thicker like a mouth guard so I grind plastic rather than enamel. A dentist will make a top or bottom for about $200-300 each, I think. And less stress.

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