Coffee Break: Ridged Metal Hair Tie

woman with very blonde hair wears gold hair tie; her hair isn't quite looped all the way through the ponytail making a sloppy bun

I always like a polished hair tie — and this pretty one from J.Crew is winning rave reviews.

Reviewers note that it holds their hair really well, is a great way to elevate a look, and is a really elegant look.

The hair tie is $20 — if you're looking for something more affordable, check out this similar option for $13 from Target.

Sales of note for 12.10

86 Comments

  1. If you had a free afternoon in NY late this week, how would you spend it? Open to a particular exhibit at a museum, and can be indoors or out . Assume have checked all the typical tourist things off my list; looking for something a little deeper. Staying in midtown and would like to spend more time doing versus in transit.

    1. The Met. If you’ve been once, you’ve been once, and you certainly have not checked it off any sort of forever list. I could spend a years worth of afternoons in the Met, easily.

    2. It does involve a bit of time in transit, but I would go to the Cloisters and really geek out. Especially if the weather is nice.

    3. I would go to the Rubin Museum of Art on 17th street because it’s always lovely and this is literally your last week to go there as they are closing after this weekend.

      I would browse the amazing Tibetan art, buy something as a souvenir at their amazing gift store, and have lunch somewhere fabulous nearby. I would probably avoid the High Line but might sit a bit in Madison Square Park or Union Square after and just people watch. If I was traveling home after, I would stop by Breads Bakery on 16th street and pick up a delicious Babka to take home.

    4. The weather looks lovely, so I would go down to the meatpacking district to see the Great Elephant Migration exhibit.

    5. I love the MoMa and it gets so crowded during high touristy season so that would be my pick.

    1. It’s a little more casual than I would do, but styled correctly it “could” work. I wouldn’t buy it for that specific purpose though.

    2. It could be appropriate for black tie optional with sparkalie intentional accessories, knock out shoes, and a bold lip. The dress is plain so your add-ons would really be carrying the look.

      1. agreed. and agree with the above poster i wouldn’t buy it just for this. if you own it and dont want to buy something new, i think you can definitely make it work

    3. Definitely not appropriate! You want something floor-length or maybe a little shorter (mid-shin), in a formal cut and fabric.

    4. I don’t think black tie optional means you HAVE to wear long, but this would need some serious zhushing up.

    5. I like it, maybe not for this, but I feel like it’s too early to dress shop for a spring wedding.

    6. With that dress, you are very much opting out of the black-tie part! Even with good shoes, makeup, hair, and jewelry, it seems underwhelming, like it maybe could work for an evening work cocktail-type event, but not anything more formal. The fabric isn’t helping change my mind, either.
      I’m a New Yorker and go to a couple of black-tie events a year, and I would not wear this. If you don’t have anything already, this is where The Real Real or other vintage/consignment comes in handy. You can absolutely get something fun that you’ll be happy wearing at that price point on the resale market. Or, Norma Kamali is a surprisingly great source for black-tie and party dresses. Sign up for the emails: about every week there is a “pop up” sale with heavy discounts.

    7. I disagree with others saying it could be appropriate with the right lip and bag, etc. If people are wearing floor length or midi you are going to look really out of place. The magenta would it least help it read as a silky fabric. But I still don’t think it’s dressy enough in length and shape.

      I have to attend a lot of galas for work. I’ve snapped up some surprisingly great deals on formal and cocktail dresses at BHFO. A lot of the same brands if not identical style as Macy’s if you’re shy about ordering something without trying it on. Highly recommend.

    8. I don’t live in NY so don’t know whether NY would be a special case, but I wouldn’t choose this length for black tie optional. I think this is more informal cocktail, but YMMW.

  2. Fellow ladies with bellies: what shirts are we buying now? I need to update my closet in a major way.

    1. A few weeks ago, I bought 3 of the Banana Republic’s silky classic shirts (button up) featured on this site. I like them so much I’m considering buying more. I think they would work on a lot of different body shapes.

    2. Try the “ruffled split-neck top” (with long sleeves). I’m a 5’3” apple and I have two of these in the regular length. They run a bit short & boxy which is actually reasonably flattering.

  3. Any recs for a free afternoon in Houston? Normally I would check out a museum but it’ll be a Monday, so everything is closed.

    1. The Museum of Natural Science is open on Mondays. In downtown, Discovery Green usually has something going on, and you can have lunch at Phoenicia across from the park.

  4. What’s your feeling now about 5 weeks out from the election – do you think Harris can win?

    I was excited when she arrived on the scene as I thought Biden had no shot. And now I feel like I’m resigned to a Trump victory. I know the polling shows her slightly ahead but IDK I guess I know too many people IRL in very liberal places like NYC who are saying they couldn’t possibly vote for Harris due to the economy, her economic policies, etc yet living and working in liberal NYC they are the types who’d never be truthful in polling, they’d just vote for Trump privately. So if that can happen in NYC why wouldn’t it happen all over?

    IDK I just feel fairly negative about her campaign all of a sudden as it has one hundred percent become about abortion which is not an issue everyone cares about. Even as a woman, I don’t pretend to care that deeply. Meanwhile people are still complaining about high prices even though they’ve abated, people don’t feel that and when asked she starts with – well I was a middle class kid with a single mother blah blah. I just think more and more people are going to vote with their wallets. And I don’t say this in support of the other guy – the dementia patient with no policies. But at the end of the day he’s a man and men and let’s be real many women assume only a man should be president.

    Convince me that there is some reason to be hopeful here?

    1. Yes I do think she has a chance, and I’m making the calls and going door to door and sending the postcards and talking to my network. And if all of us focus on doing what we can to help Instead of fretting, her odds get better.

    2. I don’t think she will win. She is polling behind Hillary, who lost, and well behind Biden 2020, who won very narrowly. People say Democrats outperformed polls in the last couple of elections, but Trump wasn’t on the ballot. He’s never underperformed the polls and usually outperforms them by a sizeable margin.

      But it will be crazy to have Trump elected without winning the popular vote AGAIN, which seems likely. I’d be shocked if she loses the national popular vote.

    3. One specific area where her polling is increasing most recently is on the economy. Also immigration.
      Anyone who thinks rounding up and deporting all the immigrants is good for the economy is a fool. And yes, at least JDV is suggesting that is an economic policy, not just racist propaganda to pull in the base. (And yes, despite what some person here tried to suggest to me, that campaign is NOT distinguishing between legal and illegal immigrants in targeting them to divide people. See, e.g., Springfield.)

    4. Are you a troll? Why should we convince you of anything? We all have to get out and vote. Periodt.

        1. Not the OP but I think this is worth the discussion. This is EXACTLY what happened on this board in 2016 when anyone who tried to state the reality was that many people were going to vote for Trump even if they weren’t admitting it openly – they were laughed off as selfish rich people who were out of touch. When in reality those posters WERE the ones who were in touch with middle America outside of the 95 corridor and California and with folks who aren’t all ivy league or top 20 university grads.

          Frankly it’s the same thing that happened on this board with Covid in February and March 2020. Some people tried to say they were already taking precautions, canceling cross country flights and they were laughed out of the room for living bubbling wrapping themselves.

          Apparently this board doesn’t handle dissent well.

          1. Then maybe those middle America people are garbage and know they have bad character.

          2. But this isn’t discussion, it’s crystal ball gazing. The discussion is encouraging people who are kind of undecided to not bother to show up to vote because she’ll probably lose anyway so oh well why should they take time out of their day to go vote.

            Who knows what’s going to happen? Get. Out. And. Vote.

          3. Anon at 3:54 – that’s right, calling the people on the right who might be undecided a “basket of deplorables” pre-election went so well, let’s call them garbage this time… Ugh. eyeroll. Please don’t.

          4. This board does *not* handle dissent well. I had to take a break a few years ago when commenters were getting rabid about their right to snack incessantly and also call it a “healthy choice”–it can be mind boggling even with the small things.

          5. I think no one cares about the habits of others. I think people doing exactly what they want and labeling it a superior choice makes the average person roll their eyes skyward.

    5. I don’t think she will pull it off. I have already voted for her in an early voting state but honestly we need someone who is focused on money not abortion and democracy. Those are nice in theory but people go with who they think helps their bottom line. Not that Trump does but people think he does.

    6. I live in a purple area of a red state. I expected Trump to win against Biden. Now it’s a coin toss.

      The Republicans I know are always going to vote for their nominee to get their policy goals achieved. The ones who hate Trump as a person will still vote for him to get what they want on taxes, abortion, Israel, etc.

      I know too many on the left who are just too wrapped up in their feelings. Harris doesn’t agree with them on 100% of everything, so in their minds she is just as bad as Trump.

      1. ^^^ this. She is not perfect, neither is he, but they will still vote Red.

    7. I like to think polls are more accurate now. One, because pollsters were so wrong in 2016 and have worked hard to improve accuracy since then. Two, I think it’s much more fashionable and/or acceptable to be pro-Trump in 2024. “Loud and proud.” Three, I also think the number of average Americans who voted third party in 2016 fully understood the risks in 2020 and do again now in 2024.

      Also, FWIW, I’m not hearing all abortion, all the time, from Harris in my news feed.

      1. The polls were more wrong in 2020 than 2016, fyi. It just mattered more in 2016 because the outcome was off from what polls predicted.

        I do think there’s a strong argument to be made that polls can’t capture the youth vote and if Gen Z turns out in force she can win. I’m not very bullish on that happening though. The young people I know think both sides are terrible and a lot of them plan to not vote or vote third party.

      2. I am hearing all abortion, all the time, from Harris in advertisements, but I think that’s because it’s a weak point of a R candidate in a statewide race.

    8. I think it feels better/safer for people to say “no she won’t” and appear wise as opposed to getting their hopes up and appearing naive if they turn out to be wrong. This is basically how I read every election prediction around here. Too many people buy into the idea that cynical = wise, which is probably the goal for those who would benefit from this anyway.

      Personally, I have no idea who will win but I am hopeful. Hopeful that just as there are people who vote based on their economic interests above all else, there are also a lot of fundamentally decent people who are ready to move on from all this division, who don’t want to worry about what awful thing a presidential candidate might say on the news that will require them to explain to their kids that, “we don’t talk like that about other people.” Hopeful that even if they don’t vote for the other side, maybe they just sit this one out.

      Trump has literally won only one election and dragged down every single other one since. Maybe he manages to win this time, but I don’t get this chorus of inevitability. It’s only inevitable if people allow it to be.

      1. I don’t get it either. It’s all about the swing states. I just don’t see him winning enough of them but who knows.

      2. I’m hoping there are enough people smart enough to recognize that the second term policies will not affect their net worth the same way the last term’s policies did.

      3. There may be an element of downplaying it to avoid getting our hopes up, but fwiw, I thought Biden would win and I don’t think Harris will. It’s hard to overestimate how racist and misogynistic many people in this country are, as we saw with Hillary. Hillary was a uniquely bad candidate in many ways (and I say that as a fan of hers) and has baggage that Kamala doesn’t, but she also had a lot of factors on her side that Kamala doesn’t: the ability to tie herself to a popular incumbent president, a strong economy, no big Middle East conflict, and a historically unpopular opponent. A lot of people who were horrified by Trump in 2016 now find him more palatable for some reason. I don’t get it, because what he did on Jan 6 is in my opinion far worse than anything he did in 2016 or prior, but it definitely seems to be true.

    9. In deep red Kansas, we’re seeing a groundswell of support for VP Harris. There is local polling that is moving the state from “confirmed Republican” to “leans Republican”. As she releases more detailed policy statements on economic growth and as the details of Project 2025 are being sussed out, individuals who might be inclined to vote for him are reevaluating their support.

      I would like everyone to quit sane washing his statements. He invoked the idea of a Purge yesterday, giving law enforcement carte blanche to be violent as response to crime. He said the VP was born mentally impaired. These are not statements of someone who is mentally sound.

      1. Yes he is obviously a fascist and senile but the problem is, is that REALLY being broadcast to people other than those who watch MSNBC all the time or are on X following everything in real time? Seems like most people have no idea what he says about anything so they think – eh so he’s a little racist, at least I’ll be better off monetarily. I just think most people don’t watch news all that regularly, certainly not enough to catch whatever scary thing he said yesterday.

          1. It’s ridiculous how much they “sanewash” him and make his rambling rants sound coherent and semi-reasonable.

      2. Are people really still talking about Project 25? It’s been debunked over and over.

        1. There’s been no debunking of T’s ties to the Heritage Foundation and to the specific individuals who wrote the plan. There’s also plenty of historical precedent for Heritage Foundation getting their way.

    10. I’m thinking a combination of things will coalesce: the already blue vote, the Never Trump red vote, the new voter registrations, and the fact that the pandemic deaths were disproportionately red voters who refused to take Covid precautions. I also have a question about the polls; it seems they call land lines? How can that possibly yield a representative sample?

  5. During the COVID pandemic our office became a Microsoft Teams office and one thing about the invites that is making me crazy is that as soon as the 5 or 10 or 15 minute warning pops up on people’s screens as a notification, people join the call. If enough people have signed on sometimes business is complete by the real start time of the meeting. Is this just rude behavior by my company or are others seeing this as well? Is there a way to prevent it- does just changing the notice to “no notice” end the pop-ups? Because it’s super irritating to get on even a couple of minutes early and find out that discussion has already completed. (Note that before COVID we all use dial in services and nobody showed up five or 10 minutes early for those – this is purely a teams thing)

    1. This seems like a your office thing. No one I’ve ever worked with (100s of people across many companies, departments etc) ever shows up early to teams meetings. The mention of dial in makes me think government. Aren’t your colleagues too busy to show up to meetings early?

    2. This is super weird to me. In my office, people usually show up to meetings between 2 minutes early and 2 minutes late, and there’s at least 5 minutes of casual chitchat before the actual substance of the meeting begins.

    3. This is your office. In my office people dial in 1-2 minutes early not 5-10. And for the ones that happen to be on early they’ll chit chat about the hurricane or their kids school or whatever, they don’t substantively start the meeting until everyone is on. Are you super junior? Because if not can’t you just say – hey guys it’s fine if people log on early but can we wait until the meeting time to start so the rest of us aren’t playing catch up? Frankly I think that’ll cure the early log ins.

    4. Most people in my workplace live by their google calendar and its 10 minute reminders, but nobody joins the zoom meetings early, mostly because tons of people are booked solid with meetings and jump from one zoom to the next. So our workplace’s meeting culture isn’t awesome either, but we don’t have your particular problem!

    5. Thanks everyone! No, I’m not junior, but everyone else seems to be fine with this and so it’s been a losing battle. I’ve been trying to set any of my teams meetings to have either five minute warning or no warning, but this is happening on almost every Teams call. Guess I’m glad it isn’t trending elsewhere!

      1. Not sure about teams, but on google cal, changing my 10 minute warning on an invite will have no impact on how other attendees have theirs set up. That’s a personal setting.

        1. If you create the event in Outlook you can set the default for everyone. They’d have to go in and change it themselves if they wanted to. I know this because I have shown up late to many a Teams meeting that didn’t have a reminder set.

    6. Never. That seems really rude. If you’re senior enough, I would send an agenda for my meetings and a note that the discussion will begin once everyone is on the call. Or in the moment, request everyone revisit the discussion to ensure everyone’s input. Presumably, if you’re important enough to have to attend the meeting, then you should be important enough to wait to hear their thoughts with an on-time start. If you’re junior, I would ask whoever calls the meeting to include a note on the invite that requests discussion to begin once everyone is on the call or something similar. I would find this infuriating. It’s basically saying to everyone that they didn’t need to be in the meeting after all. (Also–who has time to arrive 10 min early all the time? So many people are leaving one call for another. I would never presume to just plow forward early like that.)

    7. This doesn’t happen at my office, but it’s probably because our culture is back-to-back meetings and many run over by a few minutes. So maybe the early start problem will get better if you drown yourselves in more meetings? 🫠

    8. this is def a Your Company thing. Some people like dialing in early and just hanging out on mute so they don’t forget to join at the actual meeting time (like they know they’ll get distracted during the 10 min wait) but no one expects the meeting to actually HAPPEN then…

    9. This wouldn’t happen in my industry or my organisation, but we also wouldn’t have meetings where the business could be concluded in five-fifteen minutes with a few early people, which sounds like to me like the real problem of your organisational culture. Either too many people are being invited to meetings when their presence isn’t necessary to make a decision or you have way too many meetings that should be emails or even a group chat. Could you try going back to some meeting invites with a couple of questions or an agenda to see if it can be agreed by correspondence?

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