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Updated: Nov 1, 2018 118 Comments · by

Coffee Break: Journal Bon Shopper

Coffee Break· Under $150

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Kate Spade New York Journal Bon ShopperAs readers have already noted: Kate Spade is having a surprise sale, with prices up to 75% off, and a ton of cute jewelry, bags, and clothes. For today's Coffee Break I'm loving this witty tote (which, like much of the sale offerings, was apparently designed for Kate Spade outlet stores). I like the coated poplin, the interior pockets, and the overall size (13″ x 12″ x 5″) — great if you have a few papers, shoes, snacks, et cetera, to lug to and from the office. Originally $148, the bag is marked to $50; get free shipping if you sign up for emails from their newest brand, Kate Spade Saturday. Kate Spade New York Journal Bon Shopper Psst: The Beauty.com Friends & Family sale is on also — take 20% off your purchase, including lots of good supplies like hairbrushes and blowdryers. (L-5)

Sales of note for 9.19.24

  • Nordstrom – Beauty deals through September, and cardmembers earn 3x the points (ends 9/22)
  • Ann Taylor – Extra 30% off sale
  • Banana Republic Factory – 50% off everything + extra 20% off
  • Boden – 15% off new styles
  • Eloquii – Extra 50% off sale
  • J.Crew – 50% off select styles — and 9/19 only, 50% off the cashmere wrap
  • J.Crew Factory – Up to 60% off everything + 50% off sale with code
  • Lo & Sons – Warehouse sale, up to 70% off
  • M.M.LaFleur – Save 25% sitewide
  • Neiman Marcus – Friends & Family 25% off
  • Rag & Bone – Friends & Family 25% off sitewide
  • Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
  • Talbots – Anniversary event, 25% off your entire purchase — Free shipping, no minimum, 9/19 only
  • Target – Car-seat trade-in event through 9/28 — bring in an old car seat to get a 20% discount on other baby/toddler stuff.
  • Tuckernuck – Friends & Family Sale – get 20%-30% off orders (ends 9/19).
  • White House Black Market – 40% off select styles

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Comments

  1. Anonymous

    Reposting from the last thread (wasn’t sure if we’d have a fourth post today):

    Does anybody know of any services that will make your pictures better after you’ve taken them? (Does that question even make sense???) I have a friend who posts pictures from his iPhone that are so cool and have obviously been altered. Is there an app for that or something? I’d also like to have a program that is not-iPhone specific so I could do the same thing with the pictures on my camera. Any ideas?

    • TCFKAG

      There are tons of apps that do this, depending on the effect you want to get, but Instagram is the most popular. There are also ones that will sort of do automatic touch ups and the like or turn them into blac and white or sort of “paintings” or give other effects.

      Maybe google for the types of effects you want to get?

      • Anonymous

        Thanks. I got an answer on the other page that works for me. The problem was that I didn’t know how to Google for that really – the effects I want are just sort of vibrant colors, whatever. Not just “black and white” or “paintings.” I just want a program that has lots of choices so I can pick one. And I don’t have many friends who use Instagram (at least from what I can tell on Facebook – maybe they do and it just doesn’t say that or something), so I was not aware that Instagram will do filters like that. I’ll give it a try.

        Anyway, people on the other post (totally not you) accused this of being a joke post. I get tired of this patrolling, where everybody is just worried that someone is posting a joke disguised as a real post. Why would I ever post a joke about photo filters or whatever? That doesn’t even make any sense, and it is just insulting the OP.

        • Anonymous

          Its just because your question was so obvious. Only person said it- the others gave you answers. The great thing about this site is you can ask questions anonymously but you have to be prepared that when you ask a really obvious question (you didn’t describe the effect, you just asked if there is an application that makes photos look better after you take them. Um yeah, photoshop/instragram/literally any photo program that comes with the camera. Its technology that is decades old) you are going to get some side eues.

          • Anonymous

            Well, I’m not going to argue with you about whether I should have known of those photo programs (none of which came with my camera, by the way). I just think it’s rude to call someone out like that. I’ve seen it done to others too. Can we all please just stop worrying if a poster is trying to pull one over on us by posting a fake question as a real question?

          • NotYourGeneration

            Well, here I am, with my PhD and JD, and I guess just plain effing stupid. I also didn’t know of the magic of instagram. Too busy living my life and not posting about it.

          • Anonymous

            I’m not talking about instragram. You are saying you didn’t know that photoshop existed? Or the ability to edit pictures? It doesn’t matter what generation you are- that technology came out more than 20 years ago. I never use instragram- I’m just saying when you ask if a technology exists thats older than cell phones, people are going to ask if you are serious. What do your degrees have to do with that?

        • PollyD

          I didn’t think it was an obvious question, but then I am old and just got a smart phone a few months ago.

          Oh well, I am sure there are things that would puzzle other people but are obvious to me.

        • 2013

          I agree. If my name is not ELLEN there is no reason to automatically assume I am an idiot or a troll. That too often seems to be the attitude around here, when this site is also a great resource (and would be without the attitude).

      • Maggie

        Cropped to a square + “vintage” looking filter = probably using Instagram. It’s super easy!

        I use Picasa to touch up my pictures on my computer (from my real camera, not my phone).

        • Cb

          Picasa has some cool vintage-y filters as well as just general good (and easy) editing tools.

      • Meg Murry

        I haven’t used it myself, but when people were all in a uproar over the changes to instagram’s terms of use (I don’t remember the details, but it basically said they could use or sell your photos however they wanted, and people were furious) there were several alternatives put out there, including a flickr app. So googling “instagram alternative” would probably find some other programs/apps/services that do cool photo effects as well.

    • ceb

      If you are looking beyond apps, google “HDR photography” (high dynamic resolution). It is a method of getting supper saturated colors.

    • L2fly

      There is a free shareware Photoshop alternative called GIMP out on the web that I use to brighten up the colors in photos, but it does take some time to learn how to do simple things. It may be more than you need, but it’s available if you (or anyone else) wants to play with it.

    • sdchicky619

      PicMonkey has photo touch-up tools, although I mostly use it to make photo collages.
      Other iPhone photo apps I use in addition to Instagram: Lumie, Camera+, Piction, PicFx, MoreBeaute2.

    • j

      If you have Android, try Vignette. It’s really REALLY customizable and can make some really cool pictures. Also has the added benefits of applying the filter pre-photo and allowing you to fiddle with the settings if you please.

      • j

        OK – clarification – I can’t read today and thought you asked for a non-iPhone app. I second the Gimp rec. There’s also an online editor (I wish I could remember the name) that isn’t Photoshop, but laid out very similarly. Less of a learning curve than with Gimp, at least for me.

  2. poll

    does it sound a lot more disrespectful for somebody to say, “i’ll have my admin do xyz” instead of “i’ll ask my admin to do xyz”? and is it different when referring to more junior associates?

    and generally for admin, how do you phrase requests to them? do you say, “can you please do xyz?” or “i need xyz”?

    also for reference, i am a junior associate, and still building my relationship with my administrative team.

    • Ellen

      As long as YOU are respectful, the word’s are SECONDARY. The manageing partner often tell’s peeople — refering to me — that “I’ll have Ellen take care of it”. Some peeople would think that is not respecteful of me, calleing me by my first name, but other’s who know us just know that the manageing partner is just bieng freindly by calleing me Ellen, rather than Ms. Barshevsky, which sound’s SOOOOO Formal!!!!! Also, when he talks about Lynn, the office asistant, he some times calls her “the girl”. Lynn does NOT care, and neether do I, b/c she is young and like’s to be thought of as a young adult. What is he suposed to say anyway? ” I will have my woman take care of it?” That sound’s even MORE silly! I think that you MUST consider the audience and the SOURCE of the word’s rather then the word”s themselve’s. If the guy is OK, like the manageing partner, the words do not matter. On the other hand, if he is a jerk, then ANYTHING he says is suspect. FOOEY!

      I have to get 2 breif’s into court by 4:30 pm, so I can’t tell you much more, but I have to think of how I am ever goeing to prepare a HOME COOKED MEAL for Philip! HELP!!!!!! I may need to inlist Grandma Leyeh’s help from the BRONX. All she can say now is OY!!!!!!

    • goldribbons

      When someone is asking/telling me what to do, if I’m new, I generally take what I can get and do a good enough job that it demonstrates I’m an asset, not a peon. When giving instructions/asking for work to be done, I try to “ask” unless it’s past midnight and grammar has fallen by the wayside. However, it’s important to be clear that you actually need what you’re asking for. I try to put the question on the time part, rather than on the task – e.g., do you have time to do XYZ before lunch today? YMMV and I’m sure others will chime in.

    • mascot

      As long as you are polite, I don’t think your exact phrasing matters. That being said, remember that you are asking them to perform their job duties, not to do you a favor. As a brand new associate, I had a particularly prickly admin jump my case for asking if she minded doing something instead of just asking her to do it politely. I now only ask for a favor when it really is a favor.

    • Anon in NYC

      When speaking to other people about a task that I plan to ask my assistant to handle, I usually say something like “I’ll have my assistant handle xyz”. I’m not sure to whom this would be disrespectful — it’s a task. Presumably someone more senior to me has given me a task and I’m going to appropriately delegate. If my assistant were sitting in the room, I’d probably turn to him or her and ask if they could handle the task (rather than just simply saying that they would). I think the same applies to a junior associate (or a midlevel, or a partner saying it about a counsel, etc.).

      When I ask my assistant to do something, I always say “would you please do xyz” because that’s just polite.

    • anonymama

      I’m an admin, and personally, I prefer it when people are more direct. It feels more professional to me. But some people would prefer asking. Usually older attorneys who are more familiar with what their admin handles, and have pretty clear roles already figured out, are way more likely to say “I’ll have assistant handle xyz.”

      The key is to be clear what you are asking for, and also respectful that the admin may have other things they are working on. For things that are more a preference, or less urgent, I would ask “Can you do this?” But if something is urgent or really needs to be done soon, then it is completely appropriate to say, “I need this by 2pm, the partner wants to review it then.”

      And be respectful, but don’t feel bad or apologize for asking for something that is in the normal order of things (apologies are fine for last-minute or awful requests). It’s odd to me for someone to ask for a normal task as if it were a big deal, or a favor, when it is an integral component of my everyday job.

      Hah, now I am wondering if I ever worked for mascot.

      • mascot

        You know, I ultimately glad that I got some guidance on how to phrase things without sounding condescending. I’ve tried to keep those distinctions in mind ever since.

    • ITDS

      I am an admin, and “please” and “thank you” go a long, long way. I recently received an email consisting of “confirm this” from a fairly prickly exec, and it would have been so much nicer to receive “please confirm this”. You don’t have to be super nicey nicey, but adding please to an otherwise brief (or abrupt or curt) email can make a world of difference.

    • Senior Attorney

      I actually agree with ELLEN — as long as you are in fact respectful, the words you use are generally going to be secondary.

      This reminds me of a passage in a book I read years ago — maybe it was “Brideshead Revisited?” — in which the characters were discussing how to phrase requests to servants. One faction thought it was best to say “Will you do X, please?” and the other faction was horrified at the very thought and maintained it was prefereable to say “CAN you do X, please?” Because OF COURSE the servant was presumed to be willing to do the task, so the only remaining inquiry was whether the servant could, in fact, do the task. As in, whether it was physically possible. Thus, “Can you?”, not “Will you?” It made me giggle/shake my head then, and it makes me giggle/shake my head now.

      • Julep

        Eeek. I also agree with Ellen. That plus the Bruins win last night… *mind blown*.

        • Houston Attny

          If, at any point in the next day or so, you throw your hands up and say “FOOEY!” you’ll know you really need a vacation.

    • Julep

      I treat everyone the same. Would you ‘ask’ someone in a non-admin role to do something, or would you ‘have’ them do it? “I’ll have IT upgrade our memory…” or “I’ll ask IT to upgrade our memory…”

      Everyone I work with gets please and thank-you. In my mind, to presume that an admin needs any more (or less) courtesy than other professionals demeans the admin. I feel the same way about ‘administrative professionals’ day’ or whatever its called. I am not an admin now, but I once was and I want the same things now as I did then. Respect for my work and the opportunity to advance (should I be so inclined) is enough — you can keep the flowers and chocolates.

      • Avodah

        @Julep. Absolutely. I was an admin. Being treated with the same professionalism and courtesy that my supervisors treated others w/ went a long way. It felt condescending when people said “Ill have ___ get lunch.” instead of “I’ll ask ___ to get lunch.” Maybe it is just me.

        As far as respect for work and opportunity to advance- I could not have said it better myself.

        FWIW- When I was an admin I made more $$$ than many people in non-admin roles. I also had more education. :P

    • Abby Lockhart

      Order new checks. I use them very rarely, but for that reason I always forget to change the address on them.

    • Em

      Is the admin present? If so, I will ask – not in a way “would you mind doing this” way, but in a “do you have time right now; what’s your schedule like” way. If they’re not present, I usually say something like “I’ll have one of our secretaries do that” or “I’ll find a paralegal who has time to do that.” I feel like that recognizes that my assigned secretary or a given paralegal is not, in fact, my personal minion regardless of all else in their work life but also makes it clear that I’m delegating appropriate tasks to appropriate people.

  3. Merabella

    Alright, so I’m moving soon. I feel like I’m totally forgetting the “ALL IMPORTANT MOVING THINGS”. Tell me, what is one thing you forgot to do, or something you always do when you move?

    • Anonymous

      This may not be what you’re looking for, but label boxes REALLY REALLY specifically. Especially the box with toilet paper, paper towels, and similar types of things that you’ll need in a hurry.

      • goldribbons

        I always put some TP in the car or in my bag so I know exactly where it is upon arrival at the new place (or, in NYC, buy some at the nearest duane reade before entering my new place).

      • Silvercurls

        Label the boxes on several sides, not just 1 side or the top (because the movers will not necessarily stack them up the same way you did) and add the destination room.

        Also, number the boxes and keep a list linking box numbers & contents. It saves your sanity when you know that the frying pan will be in box 25 rather than in umpteen boxes labeled “kitchen.”

        Identify a number of key items without which you will immediately lose your mind. YMMV. My “commmand central” box included Items to Be Packed Last (markers, tape, scissors, sticky notes, pad & pens) and Vital Necessities such as contact information, current bills, and the cell phone charger. You’ll also need quick access to toiletries, medications, a calendar (if you don’t use your phone for this), sleepwear, and clean clothing and underwear for the next few days, whether you’re going to stay grubby for doing move-in chores, return to work immediately, or attend some other special event.

        Get rid of as much junk as you can before moving! Second-best solution: isolate the junk so that at least you know which boxes need further sorting and which boxes can just be unpacked. If you are a hardcore packrat (don’t ask me how I know this) you can make a second effort to downsize the “no sorting needed” boxes post-moving by donating, recycling, or dumping anything that you’re not happy to find when you unpack!

        Finally, get your bathroom, bedroom, and kitchen up and running as soon as possible in the new place. Otherwise you’ll be cringing in the bathroom, sleeping in discomfort, and paying a fortune for eating out.

        Most moving companies have web sites with information and checklists. I suspect that some women’s magazines do as well (Real Simple, maybe?)…and perhaps the archives of this site also.

    • EB

      Seems obvious, but don’t forget to forward your mail. We bought a house about a month ago and are getting tons of the prior owners’ mail (including personal cards/letters, not just mail from businesses) every day. Also, this is the first time we’ve owned and completely forgot to set up trash service (previous landlord had the service in her name and paid for it) at our new place.

      • Small Town Atty

        On a related note, if trash service is already set up, find out when the pickup is! We forgot to do this and it turned out to be harder than I thought (we live outside of any city limits), so eventually we just left our cans by the road until one day they were magically empty. Then we knew when pickup was!

      • Jill

        Yep. And change the addresses on any online shopping accounts like eBay, Amaz9n, etc., as well as the address for your health insurance.

        • Anonymous

          The one I forgot when I moved was my automatic mail order prescriptions that I had to scramble to get at the last minute when they got lost in the mail when I forgot to update my address.

      • EB

        Few more things: we put toilet paper, hand soap, medications, phone chargers, toothbrushes, toothpaste, contact solution/case, etc in a bag that I kept in the front seat of the car with me so we knew where that stuff was immediately upon arrival.
        This may be a bit over the top, but I printed off tons of large labels (glass, master, bathroom, attic, basement, etc.) and put them on the boxes. I have moved a lot and usually lose or accidentally pack the marker I was using to label boxes.
        I picked up several wine boxes from the liquor store to move glasses, vases, bottles, etc.

      • Meg Murry

        Call and get the utilities switched to your name in advance – you can usually specify the day you want it effective, like June 1 or whatever. Nothing more fun than the power company and gas company turning off your utilities that the previous people canceled at 4:30 on a Friday afternoon. We got the power turned back on right away with a phone call, but the gas took until the middle of the next week, which meant no hot water all that time. And then when they turned the gas back on the water heater wouldn’t fire back up and we didn’t have hot water for 2 weeks until we could get a new one installed. So yeah, don’t let the previous people turn off the utilities on you – its worth it to pay 1-2 days of their utilities if necessary vs moving in with none.

        And FYI, you can fill out the form to forward your mail online, you don’t even have to go to the post office

    • SFBayA

      We’ve moved 5 times in 6 years. +1 to labeling very specifically. I also put categories of clothes together in clean kitchen trash bags because I’m convinced that the boxes aren’t clean. Then I just need to open my sweater bag and put all the sweaters on their new shelf, same for workout gear, etc.

      Don’t buy the cheapest packing tape. It sucks. Spring for the better tape, and borrow one of those bad booty tape dispensers from your office packing area if you can, with the giant handle. Also note that Home Depot is the cheapest place to get boxes/tape/bubble wrap/packing paper/etc.

      Put EVERYTHING in boxes, especially if you have movers. Awkward items slows them down so minimize that.

      We pack almost everything a few days before, and the last box is our start-up box, with two sets of dishes, toilet paper, toothpaste, paper towels, hand soap, box cutter, and all the things that are really necessary immediately. That’s the first box that’s opened in the new apartment.

      It’s really easy to learn to spackle and repaint areas of the walls you’ve damaged. You’ll spend like $10 at Home Depot, a couple hours of time net, and save your deposit. My non-handy DH learned to do it and it turned out so well that you seriously couldn’t tell where we damaged the wall. Note that you’ll need a 1″ square piece of paint in order for paint matching, if you need touch up paint. Allow 48 hours minimum to complete the project because you’ll need to let the wall thoroughly dry between coats. Don’t forget the texturizer thingy for the wall if your wall isn’t smooth. Also, Mr. Clean Magic Eraser is in fact magic.

      • rosie

        U-Haul has a brown paper tape that is very easy to tear by hand and held up well the last time we moved. Also, we didn’t really price compare on boxes, so Home Depot might let you do this and be cheaper if SFBayA already did the comparisons, but U-Haul will let you return boxes. It reduced my stress level to go in, buy a bunch of boxes in all sizes without having to worry about wasting money, and then just return what we didn’t use.

      • Gail the Goldfish

        Mr. Clean Magic Eraser is AMAZING. I have no idea how it works, but truly, it is magic.

        This isn’t really a tip since it’s not something you can plan in advance for, but a funny moving story (which will out me to anyone who has ever stayed with me): When we moved into our most recent apartment, the movers were late so we didn’t finish moving until like 11 at night (yea, our new neighbors really appreciated that one). All we wanted to do was take a shower and go to bed. Except… we couldn’t figure out how to turn on the shower. Twisted and pulled everything that looked conceivably possible like it could be the switch to turn on the shower. We ended up just having to take a bath. We had to call the landlord the next day (feeling like idiots). It was not obvious, and we always make people staying with us try to figure it out before we tell them how to turn it on. No one has figured it out yet, which makes me feel better. So I guess the moral of the story is check out the shower hardware before you move in.

        • SoCalAtty

          We had a midnight move in when we moved from northern CA to southern CA. It took us longer than we thought it would with the trailer, and we had a wedding to go to the next day. I think we finished at around 3am…it was not good.

          The next time I moved, I hired movers! Learned my lesson. Check out the shower hardware and a huge second to switching the utilities far in advance and checking those, too!

    • L

      pack an overnight bag. Seriously. Clothes and regular overnight stuff plus towels, toilet paper, band-aids, advil, water bottle (refillable) bar of soap, shower curtain, sheets and a pillow. If you want to be super awesome, maybe a set or two of plastic silverware, paper plates, a few bottles of water/gatorade and a spray cleaner of your choice and paper towels, a plastic garbage bag (or two) and SCISSORS. For the love of all things polka-dotted pack an extra pair of scissors.

      Put it in your car in the passengers seat so you can get it when you need it. This way if you’re like me and realize about halfway through unpacking that you’ve completely underestimated the amount of stuff you have/traffic/time it takes to get the moving van returned, you can shower, sleep and order chinese food with relative ease. Which is really all you need your first night.

      • Sydney Bristow

        I definitely second this advice. Don’t forget to throw in things like your cell phone charger. Depending on how big your move is and how long you normally take to unpack, consider including a pot so that you could pick up some pasta and a jar of sauce so you don’t have to survive on takeout for too long.

      • Anonymous

        Definitely a shower curtain. When I moved into my current apartment, it was ridiculously difficult for me to find even a basic shower curtain liner, and I live in a major metropolitan area.

    • mascot

      Get as much organized as you can before you start packing and do your cleaning out on the front end. After packing and then unpacking 100 boxes, the last box you want to deal with is the one from the junk drawer/homeless items closet. And then you end up with a few boxes of junk that keep following you around and never get unpacked.
      Having a box for immediate needs is good too – tp, paper towels, clean sheets and towels, toiletries, pajamas, phone charger, etc. for when you just want to crash at the end of the day.

    • AIMS

      I take a week’s worth of work clothes to the dry cleaners to clean/press ahead of time so that it’s all ready for me when I’m at the new place. I find it very helpful to not have to think about what I am going to wear/where it is when I am in the middle of unpacking boxes.

      • anne-on

        Thankfully, I moved for what is (hopefully) the last time while on maternity leave, but that is brilliant!

      • phillygirlruns

        also hoping not to have to move again anytime soon, but filing this one away for sure.

    • TCFKAG

      I run around like a chicken with my head cut off, throw stuff in random boxes, whine for a week, get super sore muscles, and then swear we are NEVER doing this again and next time we are HIRING people gosh darn it.

      (Lol. Not helpful, I know – but I and my husband are terrible movers. My best friend when she moved from the west coast created a spreadsheet where she listed what was in each box and then numbered each box on the outside – made prioritizing unpacking much easier. I have never been so organized.)

    • Anon

      Drink a lot of water.

      Seriously.

      Last move involved moving out of a 2nd story apartment, without help. My BF and I moved the couch, recliner, mattresses, washer, dryer, etc. from the apartment to the moving truck by ourselves. It was a heck of a workout. Water, water, water.

    • NOLA

      Make sure you have plenty of boxes. Running out of boxes is the worst. Also, when I’ve moved, I’ve found it helpful to keep boxes in one or two rooms so you will have calm in your bedroom and kitchen and not have a house totally filled with boxes in a half-unpacked state.

    • Nonny

      If you are hiring movers who will come back and take away all your packing paper and boxes two weeks later, take them up on that offer, even if they charge extra.

      Says the person who didn’t do this once, and wallowed in paper for months afterwards since she had to put out the paper in dribs and drabs so it wouldn’t overwhelm the recycling bin.

      • Lynnet

        Hypothetically, if one were so inclined, one could drive or walk around to all of the apartment dumpsters in the immediate neighborhood and split up one’s packing stuff between the different dumpsters….

      • Meg Murry

        or put up your boxes on Craigslist or freecycle – lots of people need moving/packing boxes, you can get rid of them easily this way. Just specify that they have to take it ALL, not just come and get a box or 2.

    • rent grad

      I label boxes really well but I also number the boxes with a priority type system. I usually have three levels of priority – 1 being the boxes that I should unpack first and 3 being those boxes that 2 years later I likely still haven’t unpacked. But I always pack an overnight bag and keep it with me, so I make sure I have tp and toothpaste immediately available upon arrival. Good luck!

    • Abby Lockhart

      If you are hiring movers, buy some bottled drinks (water, Gatorade) you can offer them. Happy movers will move faster and go the extra mile for you. Also have some cash in your pocket to tip at the end. I also spent a lot of time with a Container Store catalog before moving into my current space. The storage in my last place is quite different from that in my current place, and having a plan for where things would go, and a box/bucket/basket/hanging thing-a-ma-bob in place before unpacking made a world of difference. This may not apply to your situation, of course. If you are doing the move-out clean yourself, be sure you’ve got those supplies on hand. I find it most efficient to clear out and then clean one room at a time, then move to the next, and put all of the boxes in one designated area, preferably near a door.

    • Lilly

      I remembered to do this on my last move, and it was helpful. Pack a suitcase, as if for a long weekend but instead of the weekend the “trip” is your moving day and about three days after. Take the suitcase with you – do not give it to the movers. My suitcase had travel size toiletries, makeup, hair dryer, a nice casual outfit, a couple of ratty outfits for unpacking and doing stuff in the new house, work outfits, healthy snacks, bathroom tissue, a shower liner and rings, a couple of towels, and a set of sheets. Tar ruling with the suitcase was one box of stuff the dogs would need, another box of basic cleaning supplies, and temporary, stick up window shades. Amazon has the shades, called Redi Shades, and I can’t recommend them highly enough if you’re moving in without window coverings in place. Light filtering shades which provide total privacy when down are $8 to $15. A little more money gets room darkening ones for a bedroom. They raise and lower, and stick well enough that some of mine stayed up half a year while I figured out what kind of window coverings I wanted. They remove without marring painted trimwork.

      • Lilly

        “Tar ruling”. Stupid autocorrect.
        “Traveling”, not tar ruling. Sometimes I really wonder about the people who programmed autocorrect.

    • anonypotamus

      I seem to recall a post/thread on this topic that came up recently under “Last year on [this site]” Try searching for that thread – I think it had a ton of great/smart/duh ideas that I wanted to flag for future reference.

    • short distance moves?

      Question about moving short distances within the same city (about ~1 mile). Does anyone have experience with a moving company which offers reuseable crates and or cloth packing materials? It just seems to wasteful to use all those cardbord boxes and bubble wrap for a short move, where it’s not necessary to have things taped up so as to survive a cross-country haul.

      • Meg Murry

        no experience with a company, but for a cross country move with an open pickup truck we bought a ton of rubbermaid storage totes, then sold a lot of them on craigslist for a discount when we unpacked. We also used towels, sheets, tableclothes and t-shirts to pack between dishes rather than buying bubble wrap or paper, and asked our coworkers to give us their newspapers for a few weeks to use as packing paper – it worked just fine and we didn’t spend a lot of money. For other short haul moves we also did things like just load dresser drawers still full of clothes right into the backseat of a car and drove them across town, and laid clothes and coats on sheets across the backseat still on the hangers – no need to box it up and then unpack it. We also followed the suggestion above and took everything that could stand to be drycleaned to the cleaners a week in advance like winter coats, then picked it up after we moved.

        • short distance moves?

          This is a great idea! I’m more concerned about the environmental waste than the cost, so this might be perfect!

    • Cornellian

      Transfer the utilities to your name.

      OR, forget to, and then have a thousand dollar bill the next year when you figure it out.

    • Blue

      Buy good packing tape with the fancy dispenser. I moved two weeks ago and I cannot even tell you how much time I spent trying to find the ends of that cheap packing tape.

    • Senior Attorney

      Not a moving tip per se, but don’t get all excited and buy a bunch of stuff for the new place until you’re actually IN. I have been burned several times by buying everything from furniture to artwork to kitchen stuff that I thought would be perfect in the new place, but either didn’t fit or just wasn’t right for one reason or another. Be patient. There will be plenty of time to shop once you’re settled.

  4. TCFKAG

    Thanks to the Anon yesterday who recommended Dance Academy – I’m a couple episodes in and I already really like it. It really is like a younger, Australian Center Stage. :-)

    • Diana Barry

      Yes!!! Although I always wish they would show more dancing. Couldn’t they have made Center Stage into a tv show?

      • Anon

        I feel badly every time I watch Center Stage for agreeing that Jody *is* on the large-side for a ballet dancer. Even though she isn’t, objectively, a large person.

        –Buries head in shame.

        • z.

          I feel guilty for immediately recognizing her as Jody from Center Stage when she had a recurring role on One Tree Hill as Clayton’s dead ex-wife/psycho stalker. Or that she’s on a McDonald’s commercial for some kind of mint cold coffee drink. And is now on Pretty Little Liar’s as Aria’s dad’s psycho stalker.

      • anon

        But they did make Center Stage 2. Which is so bad and yet contains one of the funniest scenes in the history of movies:

        Boy and girl are dancing in street, finally declaring their love and attraction for each other. Scene cuts to girl’s apartment doorway, where they do one final dance move to fall into her bed. Cut to black.

        Gets me every time.

  5. AIMS

    Okay, total TJ. Prince Harry is in NYC/NJ today and I am daydreaming about how we run into each other on my way home and then get married. Very hard to focus on my work right now.

    • LilyB

      don’t you agree that the coolest thing about marrying Price Harry would be having Kate as your sister-in-law???

      • AIMS

        Not that Kate wouldn’t be lovely, but the coolest things for me would be all the hats, Harry, and the castles. Probably in that order. I also enjoy horses so I feel like watching him play polo in different countries would be a good diversion. Plus, who wouldn’t want the chance to just focus on making royal babies and attending to one’s charitable causes? And, he’s just so adorably (especially when playing naked pool).

    • Monday

      FOOEY! You’re too classy for him. But I will only voice my objection once. From now on I will be supportive and non-judgmental, whatever you decide to do. I understand that he may have appealing qualities that are not evident to waiting-room readers of Us Weekly.

      • AIMS

        Haha, I appreciate that you hold me in such high esteem, but he has a really cute bum and I am a sucker for crinkly eyes that hint at mischief.

        As a nail-salon reader of US Weekly myself, I do agree that I am probably not his usual type, but that is hardly a reason for Harry and me not to have an illicit dalliance in the highlands somewhere, at which point he will fall madly in love with me, reform his bad boy ways, propose marriage, and help me start collecting hats, doing charity and breeding corgies for the next 50-70 years. Of course, I would feel really terrible for leaving Mr. AIMS so I would make him a knight and deed him a Scottish castle. I hope he would understand.

  6. Anon

    I need some networking advice. I’m an attorney (about 8 yrs out — so mid-career I guess?) and I seriously need a new job. I live in DC and am doing the DC fed jobs app thing, which often feels like I’m just shoveling resumes into the great black maw, but I’m wondering if there are some networking steps I’m missing. I’ve been here since law school, so I have a lot of contacts, from school, from my first firm, from other jobs, and I’m definitely reaching out to anyone of those people I’m still in contact with. I’m also reaching out to anyone who I know works in an office that has an opening I’m interested in. When I say “reaching out,” I generally mean meeting for lunch or grabbing a drink and including in the conversation “hey, I’m looking for a new job — can you keep me in mind if you see anything that would be a good fit?” I’m also asking my contacts if they have other contacts they’d introduce me to.

    I’ve done a couple of “networking” events, like alumni happy hours or bar events, but they frankly seem useless. I might talk to four people in an hour, but they’re a bit random. Even if it’s a law school event, the chances that any person I talk to is actually in my practice area is kind of slim. Plus I’ve never found that a 15 min conversation at one of these events ever actually led to a real relationshop. Am I doing these wrong? Is there something else I should be getting out of these?

    Is there anything else I should be doing?

    • Hollis

      I’m not in DC, but I know from friends in fed jobs that it’s who you know. Random networking doesn’t help as much as targeting people who are in those positions now. So, can you reach out to people who are alums from your law school who are at the agencies you are targeting? Can you go to networking events for your practice area (e.g., ABA committee on whatever your practice area might be)? Or join and be an officer of an organization where there are other officers who are fed employees? Also, I am totally clueless here, but there might be a hiring freeze, which may mean that if you really want out quickly, you may need to go somewhere else as a stepping stone to your fed job. I know people who have interviewed 3 times for the first job before they got their “dream job,” and the background check took forever, but alas, that is federal hiring for you. Good luck.

      • Anonymous

        Ditto on the federal govt hiring freezes and a long and inefficient hiring process in general.

        You also have to figure out how to get by the initial screeners on the other side of USAJobs, who probably just throw darts at the applications. I just learned that my office has an open position (not for an attorney, though), and every time the screeners in HR send over a bunch of possible candidates, there’s no one who actually has the qualifications we want (ie, a degree in a specific subject area).

        I wish I had better advice.

    • Bonnie

      D.C. is tough. Do you know where you want to work? If so, find a contact in that office and ask to meet them for coffee. It’s tough and it’s awkard but I know that I only scored my dream job because I pursued it relentlessly and made two contacts through cold calls that got my resume out of the mailroom. Good luck.

  7. Ellie

    Could it be that the Cole Haan Air Talia pumps are discontinued? I only happened to buy a pair of each (the mid and the 3.5 version) and I like them sooooooo much that I wanted to buy a pair in black leather, but couldn’t find them anywhere. There are some shops that still sell them, but none of them ship outside the US, and unfortunately, I live in Europe. Is there any store that still has them and ship internationally?

    • jcb

      I don’t know, but I’m mad at mine. I’d read on here that some people were having issues with the heels breaking – right in the middle – and sure enough, the exact same thing happened to my favorite aubergine pair (the mid version). As though I had tried to break the heel in half using a hammer. So mad. No other pair of shoes I’ve ever owned has ever done that before.

      • Same Boat

        I had two separate pairs do this. If you call their Customer Service, Cole Haan will send you mailing labels so you can send the shoes to their repair department. In my case, I got gift cards for full retail value (~$180), as the shoes couldn’t be fixed. The process took about 6 weeks, but was totally worth it. And I agree–insanely frustrating that this is a pattern with the Air Talias!

        • jcb

          Thanks!! I hadn’t even considered that they would make it right – makes sense if it’s a known problem with the style.

    • Lynnet

      My local TJ Maxx had a huge selection a few days ago (in nude, not black), so you might check your local discount retailers in the nicer parts of town.

    • Mpls

      Could be – I haven’t seen them showing up in the stores or online. Which is a bummer. I think the only place I’ve seen them lately is 6pm.com – maybe Zappos.

      I wonder if that has something to do with Nike selling the brand?

  8. hmm.

    A conundrum for you savvy ladies:

    I am actively looking for a new job, in large part because there are fairly limited opportunities for further advancement at my current job. I have a second interview next week for a position that interests me very much and for which I think I have a very good chance.

    That said, despite the aforementioned limitations, there are *some* opportunities at my current job, and I’ve been given a rather long leash to develop a new project in my current role. The project has been in the works for some time and is really starting to take off. It’s exciting and I’ve invested a lot in it, and I am despairing a bit over the possibility that it may die if I leave in the near future. Although there are many aspects to my current job that I am eager to leave behind, this project is not one of them.

    At what point do I casually suggest to my supervisors–who have been *very* supportive of the exciting project–that I’m looking at other opportunities and need reasons to stay put? I’ve been getting signals from one of them that he’s eager to tout my recent successes with this project, and though I don’t *think* there’s room in the budget/hierarchy to advance me further at my current company, I suppose I should at least find out. Yes? No? Please advise.

    • Susie

      Tell your supervisor when you have another offer and not a moment sooner. Then if the project is as important to the company as it is to you, maybe they will give you a reason to stay.

    • Bonnie

      If you have a good relationship with your supervisor and think you could be happy with your current job, I’d suggest having a frank discussion with them about what is lacking and how things could be better. Definitely do not threaten to leave but I don’t see anything wrong with letting your boss know that you are looking at other opportunities.

      • BRant

        Agree- talk about your growth opportunities at the company. If you mention you want to grow, and your supervisor says there are no opportunities, nobody should be surprised when you start looking.

        My boss is currently pretty nervous about me leaving, so I hear about once a month that she’s got big plans for me, yadda yadda. I’ll believe it when I see it, but quite honestly, this job is too cushy for me to ever leave. I will, however, let her continue to worry.

    • Anonymous

      I don’t think you should ever hint you are looking or accept a counter offer. It marks you as disloyal. If you want a promotion, ask for it. If you want this project to boost your career, make your case to your manager. But don’t tie it to a new job.

    • Parfait

      I would actually not even mention that you’re looking elsewhere. Have a conversation about Great Project and what opportunities there might be for you to build on that success, where it might take you, etc. Then you can weigh that against any offers that may come in.

      • Nonny

        I got Q3 wrong as well, but can’t remember the other one I didn’t know. I think it was might/may.

    • jcb

      I got 8 out of 10 – missed the ones where you had to know the name of the incorrect usage. I don’t know! I just know that it’s wrong! Is it bad that the grammar quiz was the highlight of my day?

      • Maggie

        Nope I get weirdly excited about these things too! 9/10, so close… I got stuck on might/may.

    • Double Hoo

      Way late for this thread, but #3 is bugging me… sure, it might technically be possible to deduce that “Hilary” is male through the comma placement, but come on. First, Hilary is a female name (and I am British, so familiar with names like Leslie, Ashley, Kim, etc. that are ambiguous — to me, Hilary is not one of them). Second, who would ever phrase that sentence that way in a spoken conversation? Third, it’s a conversation, so you wouldn’t know where the speaker intended to place a comma anyway.

      I hereby declare that this question doesn’t count in the quiz because it’s so silly.

  10. Anon

    A bit of late afternoon venting. We are reorganizing and I have been discussing a move to a different area for a few months. I am really looking forward to the move, and have received feedback from others that this will be a great step / promotion for me. Practically everyone is treating it like its a done deal. Today I got my offer letter and the salary is significantly, significantly below what I was expecting, below comparable positions, etc. I will definitely negotiate, but I am so upset that they either did not do their research, or really think this is a fair level of compensation.

    • Anonymous

      When you say “different area,” do you mean different geographical locale? Are you sure that this is not market for that area? When you’re moving from one city (NYC) to another city (more mid-sized), it is not unusual to take up to a 40% paycut on the salary.

      In the end, you can always say “no” if the comp is too low and keep looking, but do not take the job and grow resentful and hate working there – I’ve been there and it would have been better for me (I think -hindsight is 20/20) to hold out for the perfect position, with good comp, instead.

      • Anon

        I meant a different division, same geographic area. You are right about not growing resentful. I’m trying to figure out how to still sound positive but stand my ground, especially since they’ve been making preparations for my transfer for some time now.

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