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Workwear Hall of Fame: Fawn Pump

Coffee Break· Workwear Hall of Fame |

Purple Pumps: SJP by Sarah Jessica Parker Fawn PumpI’m always a fan of purple pumps, but my sweet spot is usually the more wine-colored, dark purple — these lighter purple heels from SJP look gawrgeous. They only have 2 reviews, but they’re both 5-star, which is always a good sign. The shoes are $350 at Zappos, available in sizes 35-40.5. SJP by Sarah Jessica Parker Fawn Pump This post contains affiliate links and Corporette® may earn commissions for purchases made through links in this post. For more details see here. Thank you so much for your support! 2020 Update: We’re adding these heels to our Workwear Hall of Fame because after years they’re still around, coming out in new colors, and getting rave reviews.

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Workwear sales of note for 6.02.23:

  • Nordstrom – The Half-Yearly Sale has started! See our thoughts here.
  • Ann Taylor – $50 off $150; $100 off $250+; extra 30% off all sale styles
  • Banana Republic Factory – Up to 50% off everything + extra 25% off purchase
  • Boden – Sale, up to 50% off
  • Cole Haan – Up to 50% off select styles; extra 20% off sandals & sneakers
  • Eloquii – 60% off all tops
  • Express – 30% off all dresses, tops, shorts & more; extra 50% off clearance
  • H&M – Up to 60% off online and in-store.
  • J.Crew – Up to 50% off “dressed up” styles (lots of cute dresses!); extra 50% off select sale
  • J.Crew Factory – Up to 60% off everything; 60% off 100s of summer faves; extra 60% off clearance
  • J.McLaughlin – The Sale Event: extra 30% off
  • Loft – 40% off tops; 30% off full-price styles
  • Sephora – Up to 50% off select beauty.
  • Shopbop – Up to 60% off sale
  • Sue Sartor – Lots of cute dresses on sale!
  • Talbots – 25-40% off select styles

Other noteworthy sales:

  • CB2.com – Up to 40% off; pop-up sale up to 30% off
  • Joss & Main – Up to 60% off, plus an extra 20% off with code
  • Tuft & Needle – Save up to $775 on mattresses (Reader-favorite brand; Kat really likes hers!)
  • West Elm – Up to 25% off in-stock furniture; up to 60% off clearance

Some of our latest posts here at Corporette…

And some of our latest threadjacks here at Corporette (reader questions and commentary) — see more here!

About Kat

Kat Griffin is the founder, publisher, and editor-in-chief of Corporette. You can read more about her here.

Comments

  1. dc

    Health insurance question: I saw my internist last month for just a pap smear — nothing else. I got an EOB this week saying that I owed a $30 copay. I called Blue Cross, who said that the provider had billed it as an office visit instead of just as a pap; the provider’s billing department says it was written up as an office visit, so that’s how they billed it. When I pressed, the rep I spoke to acknowledged that it was for a gynecological exam and pap, but said it wasn’t listed as preventative. …which, of course it’s preventative, right?

    Am I correct in thinking that copays don’t apply to pap smears under the ACA? I asked that it be submitted for review and possible rebilling. Is there anything else I should do in the meantime? TIA.

    • Cj

      Correct. There should not be a co-pay if he visit was pap only for your once a year preventative exam. You were fine to do what you did and nothing more need be done. See what happens. Don’t pay now.

      But if you had a discussion with the doctor before or after the pap where you mentioned any issues / concerns and the doctor gave you any input, then the clinic could code it as an office visit too…. Especially if the doctor had to document any discussions in a note.

      This billing is usually done separately by billing specialists in the hospital or clinic, and docs usually have no idea at all. FYI.

    • anon8

      The way things are coded can make a huge difference. My husband went in for what he thought was a preventative colonoscopy, but it was coded as diagnostic so we had to pay a huge amount of of pocket.

      The insurance company actually said they would accept an updated claim from the doctor if they wanted to change it to preventative. We lucked out and go a helpful person on the phone who actually gave us the codes for preventative care.

      My husband actually spoke to the doctor who agreed it should have been coded differently, but the office manager at the hospital wouldn’t budge. Very frustrating.

      Now we know to ask about these codes before procedures are done.

      • ouch...

        Did they remove a polyp or do any biopsies etc.. with the colonoscopy? Or was it just a routine screening colonoscopy with no findings? If anything was actually “done” during the colonoscopy, then the test immediately changes from preventative to diagnostic. It is totally totally crazy. You go in to the test not knowing if it will cost NOTHING or if it will cost a couple thousand dollars towards your deductible. Just… crazy.

        But if it was a truly preventative colonoscopy, I would raise hell and keep asking for the supervisors/higher level people to complain to. It is an error.

        • anon8

          No polyp removal or biopsies. I guess the way the doctor’s notes were interpreted, it was seen as diagnostic. Both of us were on the phone numerous times with the doctor’s office and hospital and we didn’t get anywhere. They just flat out refused to change the coding, so we just paid.

          We’re lucky we haven’t had significant health issues. It is crazy how much stuff costs. We kept getting bills in the mail from different places. I just like to make people aware of it because we didn’t know about this before.

    • anon a mouse

      It’s not clear from your comment whether you asked your insurance to review it or the doctor’s office. You need to get the doctor’s office to re-code it before insurance reviews it. Otherwise insurance will keep processing it the same way, as a non-preventive visit.

      Ask me how I know.

    • Marshmallow

      Something very similar happened to me: annual pap billed as an office visit. It took some back and forth but my doctor re-coded it as preventive and then my insurance covered it 100%. You have to be persistent though, which is totally annoying.

      The one that REALLY burned me was my IUD insertion. I switched from my preferred BC method (NuvaRing, which wasn’t covered because it’s a brand name *insert eyeroll here*) to an IUD that my insurance assured me would be 100% covered. Sure, the IUD was covered. But the insertion was billed as an office visit and the required follow-up ultrasound was billed at some even higher diagnostic rate. I wound up paying around $180 out of pocket. So much for “free” preventive care.

  2. Anon

    This morning’s thread got me thinking — can we talk 401k/retirement/TSP? What is everyone’s strategy (and age)? Are you maxing out to 18k or just to an employer match, or not maxing out at all? Goals? I feel like it’s not something I can talk about IRL and I’d like to know if I’m missing something/doing it right or wrong etc.

    • Anonymous

      My husband and I are both 30. We have started saving a significant amount for retirement only recently, because we were aggressively paying off debt before that. We are currently both contributing 14% of our salaries every year. For him that’s close to the $18k limit, for me it’s about half that. In addition, his employer contributes 10% of his salary to his retirement account. I don’t get an employer contribution yet, but will also have 10% in a couple of years (there’s a waiting period).

    • jwalk

      I’m 25 and contributing enough to get my full employer match plus a little extra. It’s not close to the max and I could definitely add some more, but I’m starting grad school in the fall and trying to balance putting a good amount into my Roth 401(k) while still leaving some extra to use for grad school (and avoid extra loans). Every year I get a small raise (basically COLA) and at the same time add a percent or half percent to the amount going into my 401(k), so I don’t notice the money leaving my pocket. My goal is to be at or near the max on a yearly basis within the next 5-10 years.

    • Anonymous

      Early 30s. I max out the pre-tax amount on my 401k ($18k); no employer contribution. We also contribute $5500 to an IRA every year for my husband. It used to be tax-free, but apparently there is an income limit to that. I hear you can convert the IRA into a Roth at the end of the year so you at least avoid paying taxes on the capital gains — we will look into that this year. I still think it’s not enough (I want to retire by 60 with lots of travel money), but have been procrastinating about figuring out other options.

      • Anonymous

        I have attempted to do that IRA-Roth conversion every year for the last three years and the amount we’ve spent “fixing” tax-related mistakes has been far more than the taxes would have been if we’d just left it.

    • Cj

      Yes, maxing out 401k and Roth IRA yearly. I am single in my 40’s, no debt, and will probably never have a mortgage due to lifestyle choices (not good financial move for me, no spouse to share expense, higher COL job option cities, frugal, future employment horizon is too risky and prefer flexibility, fear of expenses of home ownership).

      Goal….. To sleep well at night, learn to live with a modest income so my retirement transition will be secure as a single woman. Caring for my parents has taught me to prepare for the worst (and I’m working on hoping for the best).

    • Sydney Bristow

      I’m 32 with significant student loan debt. After years with either no retirement saving or just maxing out an IRA I’m trying to balance retirement savings and paying off my loans.

      I contribute 6% to a Roth 401k and my firm contributes 6% (regardless of what or whether I contribute). This is nowhere near maxing out.

      Originally my plan was to increase 1% every year thinking that I wouldn’t really feel the difference. But I feel so much pressure from my loans that I don’t think I’m going to adjust that yet. I’ll reasses once I pay off my private loans.

    • Anonymous

      I’m 35, single, no kids, been a lawyer for 10+ years. I max out my 401(k) contribution, and now have a fairly generous employer match (7%, with an option for an additional 5%). In my view, if you can cover your monthly expenses, including debt payments, and save enough for your needs and comfort, I think your goal should be to max out your annual 401(k) contribution. Last year, I did the “back-door” Roth IRA; however, I’m planning to consult a financial advisor to determine whether I should actually do that again this year. I like the idea of tax-free growth, but, I need some advice.
      Apart from my contributions to designated retirement accounts, I have a pretty good-sized investment portfolio, whose growth I plan to rely on in my retirement years. Since I have about 30 years before retirement and I have time to ride out market volatility, my investments are almost 100% in stocks.

    • lucy stone

      I’m 33, married to a 39 y/o, baby on the way. I max out my employer provided plan which has no match and also have a mandatory pension contribution which is roughly 7% of my salary and then my employer contributes an additonal 7%. For me this makes sense because I benefit from having the lower salary on my W2 due to my pretax 457 contributions, since it makes my loan payments lower. My total contributions end up being a little over 25% of my gross salary. My husband has a SEP plan that he contributes to when he can and also a large life insurance policy because he’s our higher earner and is self employed.

    • Diana Barry

      I max out at 18% every year(my firm matches 4%, which is not great but better than nothing!). DH maxes out his SEP every year too. We are late 30s. We don’t have much non-retirement liquid savings yet, but we do have equity in our home and an additional piece of real estate without a mortgage.

    • emeralds

      I’m 28 and have an employer match for the first time, so I’m contributing 8% to get the max match. It’s nowhere near the cap, but then that would be like 40% of my salary, so not a realistic goal for me. I’m planning to start contributing an extra 4-5%/month to my personal IRA in September. I’ve been contributing what I can to that IRA since I graduated from college, usually 5-10% of my takehome. I try to throw a big percentage of any windfalls or bonuses in there. I have about $2,000 in stocks with the dividends set to reinvest; I don’t plan to touch those until retirement, so hopefully that will be a nice chunk on top of what I’m saving myself.

      Sometimes I feel like I’ll never retire, but then I also feel like I’m doing the best I can. And I’m happy with a simple, low-key lifestyle in a LCOL area.

    • Anonymous

      I’m 36, married, 1 kid so far. HCOL area and daycare expenses. My husband maxes out his 401k. After years of maxing out my 401k, I contribute 11% (no match) because that’s what we can afford right now. Maxing out my 401k would be about 24% of my salary. My goal is to increase 401k savings when childcare expenses decrease, and in an ideal world to get back up to maxing out when my kid gets to public school.

    • meara

      I’m in my late 30s. In my 20s, I didn’t start for a few years, and eventually did whatever my employer matched (generally 3%?). In my early 30s, I did about the same, and I think may have bumped it up to 6% when I had an employer that only matched half (up to a total of 3%, so…I had to contribute 6 for the free money). Then the past few years I kind of realized that wasn’t going to take me very far, and bumped it up to 10%, then 12%, and now I think 15%? I should max out this year. Wish I’d done that earlier, but oh well–my salary in the early days wasn’t that much, either. The calculator on the retirement website seems to think as long as I keep at it I”ll be ok. :) But I’m also single, no kids, and only had $18K in undergrad loans which I paid off in my 20s.

    • Anonope

      Ugh. I’m in my mid-30’s, as is my husband, one kid, HCOL. We’ve paid off our loans. I put away about $7k/year, which is 5%. I do have an employer match, and plan to stay here like, forever years, so hopefully that’ll add up. I definitely feel a bit behind the ball.

    • Kiki

      I’m 43 and both my husband and I max out our 401ks (18k per year each). We don’t do any additional IRAs or anything though I think we should. I’m unclear if there are income limitations with that…

    • Anon

      I’m 26.. Maxing out 401K this year. Intended to do so last year but was out on maternity leave and my employer didn’t allow changing contributions after 1/1/16.
      It is more a tax move than a retirement move at this stage in life for DH (31) and me:/

    • Lillers

      We are in our early 30s, living in a relatively HCOL area (not SF or NYC though). No kids yet. Aggressively paid off our student loans within the first 5 years of working. My DH and I both max out our 401(k) and IRAs. We also contribute to our own brokerage account for retirement, although this amount varies from month-to-month depending on our expenses. Our goal is to retire at 55, so we want to have savings to dip into without penalty.

      That said, we try to balance the “save all the money!” thoughts with “enjoy your life now!” experiences. We find it fun to save up for shared goals and retirement is one of them. Along with a vacation home :)

  3. Another R

    I am an attorney with several years of experience. Earlier this year I essentially lateraled and my current practice area is relatively similar to what I have done in the past. The partner I work for is nice and experienced (this is my opinion as well as the general consensus in the legal community in my area based on my diligence). The partner is also exceedingly busy. So far, more often than not, assignments have been given in a vacuum without context or any other documents but the one at hand. Sometimes when I ask for additional information I get it, sometimes I don’t. I do not have client contact. I cannot tell if this is: part of my “training,” because the partner is too busy and is overlooking relevant things, because the partner is holding tightly to clients/work, or because of some other reason I have not considered. Thoughts? How would you proceed if you were me?

    • Anon

      What year are you? I’d handle it differently as a 3rd yr vs. an 8th yr. As a 3rd yr, you kind of have to put up with it. As an 8th yr, I’d start to insist on client contact to see what he says; are you on client calls? If not, is it bc he doesn’t think of it or he doesn’t want you to have contact? What happens if you were an 8th yr who said — in order to write this brief, I need to know x, y, z, about the facts — is that knowledge you have or do we need to schedule a call with the client?

      • Another R

        Much closer to 8th year than 3rd. If I say I need x, y and z, the partner either gets it from the client and provides it to me or tells me to do as much as I can without x, y and z.

        I’ve pushed things a bit, but not as much as I might normally be inclined to do. Once, separate from any specific request for information, I indicated I felt as if I was in the dark and stated I did not know if that was intentional or not. I did not hear back on this comment. I just cannot tell how much of this is due to the partner being so busy (oversight) and how much is intentional.

        I’ve worked for amazing mentors and total a$$holes. I always got a sense of maliciousness from the latter that I am not getting here.

      • Another R

        I should add that everyone at this firm has the option to work remotely whenever they wish so the everyday interactions I’m used to aren’t happening with great frequency. I do see the partner and other colleagues in person but email is the most common form of communication between us.

    • Anonymous

      A partner I worked for was similar, and I always thought that one of the reasons he was so exceedingly busy was because he didn’t delegate enough. (i.e. he’d have less to do if he would just let me do the interview instead of doing it himself). He got better after we had worked together for a while because he trusted me to take care of it. So I guess my advice is two-fold – (1) can you offer to call the client to get the info/whatever you need and see if he bites, framing it in a “it will save time” way; and (2) perhaps you just need to wait it out a bit.

  4. Anon

    So we have a soon-to-be 2L summer associate at our work place. He’s done a nice job (from what I hear – I haven’t worked with him) and is a well spoken/polished guy — I have talked to him. He and I were talking re the upcoming on campus recruiting at his top 10 law school. He has quite a few interviews but is nervous about the whole thing and obviously wants a few more interviews in order to up the odds that he gets a biglaw summer gig and gets to be in DC. In talking it came up that I was at a biglaw firm for 10 yrs — just left last yr for this job. He had ranked that firm in the on campus process but didn’t get an interview (not bc the firm said no, just bc of the matching algorithm the school uses).

    He politely asked if I’d be willing to connect him to someone over there; he wasn’t pushy about it at all and would take no for an answer. Thing is — while I have many partner contacts at the firm and was well liked, I’m not happy with how my career turned out at the firm — i.e. didn’t make partner; got pushed out etc. While it is a vault 20 firm, now that I know how ruthless they REALLY are and how they will treat their longtime trusted associates — I have ZERO interest in recommending that anyone go there. So when I meet a solid kid like this I’m thinking — go someplace else where you’ll have a better career. And yet part of me thinks — he may not be looking to go to a firm and make partner in a decade; he may just be looking for money and a good work experience — both of which he will get. I know if I send the resume, they WILL look at it; and it would be a confidence booster to anyone to go into on campus recruiting with a round of interviews at a major firm already under your belt. But mixed feelings and I DON’T want to share my career ups and downs with a 25 yr old. WWYD?

    • Anon in NYC

      I would send it along and let him make his own decisions. If he asks you about the culture, share your opinions.

      • Senior Attorney

        Yep. As you know, the vast, vast majority of people who start out in firms like that end up leaving for a million reasons. He’s a big boy and knows how to ask questions.

        I would urge you to be honest if he asks about firm culture and your experiences, though.. You can talk in generalities and even tell your own story but give the impression it happened to somebody else. (Honest-ish, I guess…)

    • LAnon

      You should share your career ups and downs with a 25 year old – great “real world” learning experience for him! You don’t have to go into the gritty details of every way that they slighted you, but you could tell him that you’d be happy to recommend him to them, but are a little hesitant to recommend them to him.

      He might ignore your advice, or give you more insight into what he’s looking for, but I don’t think you’re going to do any major damage by suggesting that it’s a great place for some money and experience, but you found it to be a poor long term fit.

      • Anon

        I think the “you’re willing to recommend him to them, but not them to him” would be an excellent way to phrase this. As a recent grad, that would be something I would really appreciate. People want to go where people like, or at least don’t hate, work. I would want to know your experience to make my own decisions.

    • Bee

      If it were me, I would probably be honest-ish with him about my experience at the firm. Nothing you wouldn’t want him repeating internally at the firm, but negative enough that he’ll get the point. Something like, “It’s up or out and partnership prospects are very limited.”

      Honestly, though, this is a lot of firms. Maybe it will make a difference for him if he gets a bunch of offers but it’s not going to dissuade him from asking for an interview. If you think well enough of him, it doesn’t hurt to send along his resume.

      • Anonymous

        Exactly. This is all big firms. Stop being so bitter that your career worked out like most people’s do at those places.

    • The sad reality

      He’s male. I’m assuming your female. Sadly, his experience at the firm might be far better than yours. (Because the firm may be sexist; not because you aren’t awesome).

      • Anonymous

        Sad, but that was my first thought too. I also agree with advice above to warn him in broad terms that wouldn’t offend any partners at the firm (e.g., “it’s very tough to make partner there”) and then let him make his own decisions.

      • Anonymous

        Nice attitude. I hope you face the situation of working long hours for a decade for something you want only to be denied – and someone helpfully tells you to get over yourself.

        OP – I get it and I’ve been there. I think your second line of thinking is right – right now he needs to up his odds of getting one offer as he will need a paycheck. So help him out with that if you can. Now if he’s in the fortunate situation of getting 2 or more offers and one of them is your firm, then I see nothing wrong with tipping him off that maybe your former firm isn’t the best option.

        • Anonymous

          I’m not Anon at 3:14, but you do realize that OP is the same poster who has been peeing and moaning about her job situation here for months, right? Anon at 3:14 was not responding to one remark, she was responding to a poster who has posted here probably 20 times in the last year about how miserable her life is now that she failed to make partner at one firm and is in a govt job. The first few times she posted she got lots of great advice and empathy, but she appears to be taking none of it and people are sick of hearing about the situation.

      • Anonymous

        +1

        This weird obsession with your own career unhappiness is getting tired. We get it – you didn’t make partner, you ended up with a perfectly good government job that lots of attorneys would kill for that is apparently not good enough for you, and you’re convinced your unhappiness is entirely the fault of the firm and you had absolutely nothing to do with the outcome that has apparently been foisted upon you.

        Enough. Get a therapist and get over yourself.

        • Anon

          Wait, do you know who the OP is? I’ve been reading this site for a while and have no idea. Or maybe I’m not paying attention. Not asking for you to out them but just making the comment that I guess I pass over these kinds of threads generally.

      • AnonNY

        I’ll take your guys word for it bc I don’t read here daily, but I find it really really hard to believe that there is ONLY 1 poster amongst all the readers in the predicament of not getting the job she wanted and being stuck in one she doesn’t like. You may be jumping all over the OP for no reason.

        • Different anon

          Possibly, but the writing style is the same from post to post. Also, I don’t think there are many people who consider a 10 year run at a big firm to be the worst thing that ever happened to them.

  5. Staying Hydrated

    I sometimes have to take a medication that really dehydrates me (dry eyes, dry mouth, thirst, awful headaches What can I do to stay hydrated? I am drinking water regularly, but was wondering if there are any other things to do — would eating fruit for instance help? TIA!

    • Anonymous

      Salt will help you retain more water, so eat salty nuts, etc. Drink water with electrolytes in it will also help you retain some of the water. Coconut water also seems to hydrate me better than regular water.

    • Bee

      My allergy medicine does this. I do find that swapping out my normal meals and snacks for something more fruit and veggie centered tends to help – celery sticks and grapes instead of almonds for a snack, veggie-dense salad instead of whatever came out of my crockpot for lunch. I also try to cut down on salt and drink less coffee (my downfalls).

    • Cj

      If you get headaches and are thirsty, this sounds like true dehydration and you must drink…. Especially is your heart rate is up, your blood pressure is down and you feel a little woozy if you stand up too fast. There’s no way around it but drinking. I would also recommend some low calorie sports drinks with salt (eg Powerade zero) or added salt in your food that day to try and help you hang on to the fluid you are drinking.

      Talk to your doctor about lowering the dosage of this medication or alternatives. Try dehydration will make you tired, have difficulty concentrations/thinking, and can put you at risk for falling.

      If it is simply dry mouth/dry eyes as a side effect, then eye drops and lozenges/gum, a glass of ice etc… can help and there is a whole line of mouth care products at the drugstore that can help dry mouth.

      • Anonymous

        This. I had a medical issue that, in Eastern Medicine, is attributed to chronic dehydration. In addition to the Western Medicine remedies, I drink 64 oz. of water per day total. For each 8 oz glass, I add a pinch of Himalayan sea salt (table salt if at a restaurant). It works!

        On their own, neither the salt+water or the western remedies are effective. Water (no salt) and western remedies was not working.

        I also get my blood pressure checked monthly by the doctor. Despite all the salt, it hasn’t changed over the last 6 months. Of course, consult your own doctor.

    • BB

      There have been studies that show that drinking milk helps hydration more than just water (something about the fats helping). It’s not calorie-less like water, but if that’s not a concern, maybe something to try?

    • Wendy

      I also have a problem with dry mouth as a result of allergies and medication. My dentist recommeneded using Biotene to counteract the dry mouth which can cause cavities. See https://www.biotene.com/. I don’t know if it would help with the dry eyes and headache.

  6. Anonymous

    I’m invited to a wedding this fall (in the south, in the late afternoon in to the evening, outdoors ceremony) with the dress code of “elegantly casual.”

    Does anybody know what this means? What would you wear if this was you?

    • Anonymous

      I’ve gone to weddings in the Northeast that were “elegantly casual” or “dressy casual” (I think they’re synonymous but maybe I’m wrong). Women wear sundresses or brightly colored business casual dresses and men wear khakis or dress pants with a dress shirt and some but not all wear a tie and/or sport coat. I think of it as what you’d wear to church. But the south is a whole other ballgame when it comes to weddings, so I really have no idea if it means the same thing there.

    • Anonymous

      My guess would be that they want people to not show up in t-shirts and jeans, but still be casual. I would go for a floral dress with cork wedges. Something easy, but also something you wouldn’t mind seeing pictures of in ten years

    • CPA Lady

      A jersey maxi dress? I got one from soma called the “midi wrap dress” that might be considered elegantly casual? I think its sold out but you can still see a picture of it on the website if you google.

  7. Trashy TV!

    Can we talk about the delicious trashiness that is The Bachelorette? Although that tire fire just ended, here comes its dumpster fire cousin, Bachelor in Paradise! Why do I love this crap?! The only thing that makes me feel a little better is that this is the only trashy tv I watch. Does anyone else watch and enjoy (and maybe even feel a little better about your own life)?

    • Tetra

      My fiance and I started watching with Ben’s season, and now watch religiously. It is so ridiculous and fun to discuss!

      • Trashy TV!

        So, I don’t really watch The Bachelor – it’s the only one of the three in the franchise I can’t get into. I think I get bored watching all those women cry SO MUCH over a guy they barely know.
        That said, Wells might be my fake internet boyfriend.

        • Meg March

          I love the Bachelor because the women typically get so much cattier and have more drama than the men on the Bachelorette do. However, the last couple seasons have not held true to that trend, what with Nick vs Shawn and Chad.

    • Anonymous

      I watch the bachelor/rette and Real Housewives of NJ for my trashy tv. Can’t believe Jojo picked Jordan – just like Andi Dorfmans pick of the washed up baseball player; just like them I can’t see if lasting beyond 6 months. She let go of good, employable guys like Luke (West Point grad) and Chase for a pretty face who couldn’t hack it in the nfl?!

      • Tetra

        They never discuss practical things like jobs, where they want to live, or even their religions or overall outlook on life! It’s crazy.

    • TK

      I have watched all three, BIP is my hands-down favorite. My husband gave me the side-eye when I purchased Season 1 of BIP on Amazon but he was hooked by episode one. The tears! The alcohol-fused drama! The declarations of love! The heartbreak! Glorious.

      By day we have important, responsible attorney jobs and in our personal lives we raise a toddler and care for aging parents. It’s nice to have an outlet that is so farfetched and disconnected from our reality that we can just indulge and laugh.

      Bachelorette wasn’t as much fun. Too much agonizing over whether someone wash “there for the right reasons.” Such terrible options – I think 3 of the ‘top 4’ were unemployed. It half pretends to be a serious show, while BIP doesn’t even try.

      • Anonymous

        I love the “former competitive swimmer” and “former football player” nametags – I mean… really people?

  8. Eyeliner?

    What’s everyone’s favorite liquid eyeliner?

    I bought a Sephora brand one a few months ago to try and I think I really like the look, but not the actual liner. Some of the things I’m looking for: Sephora-carried brand (not drugstore…so close to 500 points!), no budget, very fine tip, nice smooth black lines. TIA!

    • Anonymous

      Benefit They’re Real push up liner.

      It’s like gel, but in a marker tip…. I love.

    • Anonymous

      I really like Kat Von D. It doesn’t smudge or bleed throughout the day (and I’m terrible about itching my eyes). I use the finest tip available but it gets harder to apply it in a super fine line after a couple of weeks of use. I have an old Mac gel liner that I apply with a brush – great smooth, super fine line – but it will smudge if you look at it wrong.

    • From Hawaii

      MAC liquid last liner; it’s liquid that you apply with a brush and it does NOT budge. I liken it to acrylic paint. :)

    • LAJen

      The Stila waterproof pen eyeliners. They are flawless and goof proof. They don’t smudge, even if I tear up during a movie or sweat while dancing all night. Love.

      • DC Anon

        Stila works SO WELL for me. I’ve tried other liners from time to time and they’re never as good. The brush is easy to use, the eyeliner is very pigmented, it’s totally waterproof (no smudging, even with my hooded eyelids), but it also comes off easily with makeup remover.

      • nutella

        +1.

        I actually found this one buy asking someone at Sephora. I had read a blog post about another one and the Sephora woman was so great and gave me the honest run-down “this one isn’t as pigmented, this one is annoying to use and time consuming, and this one smudges SO MUCH and you’ll have raccoon eyes.” The stila one is pigmented, easy to use, can be really fine or layered thick (I’ve had it for months and the tip is still fine), stays put and the same color and point from 7:30am to 11:00pm or so when I wash my face. What I don’t understand is how it doesn’t smudge and doesn’t even run when my eyes tear up but still washes off so easily. Highly recommend!

    • Anon in NY

      I wear liquid eyeliner every day (my only other daily makeup is undereye concealer for genetic dark circles). My favorite super cheapy is ELF – at $3 you can take it on a weekend trip and not worry about losing it. For a more polished day (and longer wear) I love Stila’s all day liquid liner – easily buildable, never smears, really lasts all day.

      • pugsnbourbon

        Do you use the gel or the actual liquid? I use the gel and it lasts all day, but it usually smears onto my browbone. I should probably just use eyelid primer …

    • Scarlett

      Building off this question – does anyone have an eyeliner for upper lid “tightlining” they like? I had a makeup artist do this for my wedding & it looked rad & I’d like to try myself (not sure I could pull it off on my own, though).

      • Hermonine

        yes! I swear by my marc jacob’s “highliner.” It’s a gel crayon and it’s fabulous. It’ll come off a little during the day but I think that’s typical for tightlining.

        • Houda

          +1 a bit expensive but unbelievably creamy and easy to use as I wear contacts and am so shortsighted I can only apply makeup after having put on my contact lenses

  9. Trashy TV!

    Can we talk about the delicious trashiness that is The Bachelor*tt*? Although that tire fire just ended, here comes its dumpster fire cousin, Bachelor in Paradise! Why do I love this crap?! The only thing that makes me feel a little better is that this is the only trashy tv I watch. Does anyone else watch and enjoy (and maybe even feel a little better about your own life)?

  10. Anonymous

    I’ve never been able to get into the Bachelor franchise (not for lack of trying though!) but I love Real Housewives of NYC and OC, so I definitely can’t judge.

  11. Hilary/Donald

    OK, so I hate arguing about politics but was wondering if anyone read the Thomas Friedman NYT editorial entitled “How Clinton Could Knock Trump Out” on 8/3. For background, I’ve almost always voted Republican but I am in a heavy blue state so it never counts anyway. I’ve been “socially liberal, fiscally conservative” all my life – pro-choice, pro-gay marriage 15 years ago when that was not a popular Republican position but trained in economics with a graduate degree I’ve not been comfortable with the swing to socialism I’ve seen from the Democrats. I’m also pro-defense spending which is more Republican. Disliked Bush but also disliked Obama and Clinton too. Can’t bring myself to vote for Hilary won’t vote for Trump. I would vote for Tim Kaine if he were the top choice. But if I was in a swing state…

    Quote from the article. “And that leads to my second reason for pushing Clinton to inject some capitalism into her economic plan: The coalition she could lead. If there is one thing that is not going to revive growth right now, it is an anti-trade, regulatory heavy, socialist-lite agenda the Democratic Party has drifted to under the sway of Bernie Sanders. Socialism is the greatest system ever invented for making people equally poor. Capitalism makes people unequally rich, but I would much rather grow our pie bigger and faster and better adjust the slices than redivide a shrinking one.

    There are a lot of center-right, business Republicans today feeling orphaned by Trump. They can’t vote for him — but a lot of them still claim they can’t bring themselves to vote for Hillary, either. Clinton should be reaching out to them with a real pro-growth, start-up, deregulation, entrepreneurship agenda and give them a positive reason to vote for her.”

    Comments?

    • Anonymous

      Why should she risk further alienating the left at this point? I almost think Hillary should hide under a rock for the next 3 months and let Donald and the GOP implode.

      • Ellen

        I usueally stay away from political discussion — it is hard to find a guy to date if you start talking politic’s, but among us in the HIVE, I am a bit surprised also what the Donald is saying these days and that Ivanka has not taken over the publicity on tough issue’s for her dad. Ivanka is what I realy aspire to be — haveing both beauty, brain’s, a head for busness, and a rich husband (Jared Kushner). Ivanka was great at the convention, so she should realy tell her brothers and her dad NOT to speak out on the issue’s and let her do the talking. I am sure she could make a great Secretary of State or whatever, but not if her dad keep’s saying bad thing’s in pubic. I think mabye in 4 years that Ivanka should run for office herself, if NOT for president, then at least for NY Senator, as Kristen Gilebrand and Shumer may want to retire. I would vote for Ivanka. Yay!!!

    • Anon

      Hmm.

      I’m all for growth and entrepreneurship, but I think “because she’s not a bat-sh*t crazy, unqualified, xenophobic, sexist, racist a**hat with dangerously overinflated self-worth and a lack of respect for the reality of necessary cooperation in global politics” is a pretty freakin’ solid reason to vote for her.

    • Emmer

      Honestly, Hillary is a very smart and economic-savvy woman. I think she will advocate for policies that promote growth. She had to make some concessions in the Dem platform to appease Sanders voters, but the platform means nothing. The Republicans in Congress are not going to let anyone pass quasi-socialist laws anyway – my bet is that you’ll see some compromise measures that lean pro-free trade and growth.

    • emeralds

      I’m not an economist, but from what I’ve been seeing during my lifetime: Capitalism in the U.S. has no interest in “adjusting the slices,” unless it’s to let the 1% get richer while the rest of us struggle. That’s why you need regulation from some kind of outside body. I’m primarily a Democrat for social reasons, but I will never get behind a Republican-style fiscal platform that deregulates business. I graduated into a recession caused by a bunch of 1% pigs enriching themselves off of the backs of American mortgage holders–I have no interest in living through that again.

      • Eh...

        +1 – Trumps supporters (from what I can tell) are the people who have not bounced back from the last couple of recessions. Capitalism is doing fine – for people who have money. But the very nature of capitalism means stuff can got to sh!t in a hurry. Gov’t regulation helps to soften the valleys (and blunts the peaks) – so EVERYONE does better. And I don’t think that’s a bad thing. I don’t think we are anywhere near becoming a truly socialist society.

        Our pie is going to grow faster/better/with lots less resentment if something can be done to help the sectors of the country that have lost the manufacturing jobs that used to be the backbone of the blue-collar workforce. Some of it may be to influence some manufacturing to return (with gov’t provided incentives, tax based, rather than tariff induced, I would imagine) or via some other program. But if anything happens, it’s going to look more like the New Deal than because of Capitalism. Yeah, the gov’t might get it wrong, but Unfettered Capitalism sure isn’t going to get it right.

    • Anonymous

      If endorsements from Michael Bloomberg, Meg Whitman, Mark Cuban, Seth Klarman, and Warren Buffett aren’t enough to convince you to vote Clinton, I don’t know what will be.

      Trump is an awful business person with no understanding of international trade. The fact that he refuses to release his tax returns, even after Buffett’s offer, says a lot.

      There isn’t a third “pro-business, non-crazy” alternative on the ballot. In November it will either be Clinton or Trump who wins.

    • Anonymous

      I’m confused why a socially liberal, business Republican would feel like they can’t vote for Hillary. One of the biggest complaints I’ve heard about her is that she’s too pro-Wall Street and big business. Most fiscal Rs I know ARE voting for Hillary (and some very prominent ones have endorsed her), and for those who aren’t it’s either because 1) they don’t agree with her on some social issues and can’t get past that or 2) they’ve bought the GOP propaganda and think she’s dishonest and untrustworthy. Changing her economic policies wouldn’t capture votes from either of these groups. It seems like neither of those two reasons applies to you, so I’m confused what exactly your objection is to her. Her economic policies are not remotely close to socialism.

      • nutella

        +1

        Yeah wut? This makes me laugh, really. Somehow Hillary is simultaneously SOOOO establishment she’s a republican to Bernie backers and also SOOOO corrupt and a socialist to Trump supporters.

        Frankly, I think even if my fiance ran for president there would be some ideas I don’t totally agree with. You pick a candidate either on the whole or for some based on 1 or 2 issues. I don’t really have a problem with mostly establishment because I think status quo is doing us pretty good. We don’t need a government ‘revolution’ or coup (Turkey). And I don’t think we need a dictator (Russia). Things need fixing, sure, but I’m generally OK with how things are run.

        And by the way, you are voting for Tim Kaine — that’s why his name is on the ticket. (Same goes for backing Mike Pence with Trump or Sarah Palin if you voted for McCain, that’s how these things work.)

        Last but not least, someone says it all the time here, but until we have a true multiparty system, if you aren’t voting HRC, you aren’t “Never Trump.”

        • Hermonine

          “Frankly, I think even if my fiance ran for president there would be some ideas I don’t totally agree with.” well said.

    • Anonymous

      I vote Democrat because I believe that government influences social issues far more than it influences economic issues. To some degree the economy is cyclical. It will move up and down in response to government regulations, but also in response to factors that have nothing to do with government, like natural disasters, supply and demand, etc. Social issues are largely impacted by government policy and the resulting impact can last decades or centuries. I’m not an economist, and I don’t pretend to understand how a Clinton presidency would leave me better or worse off financially, but I know a Clinton presidency would result in all of us being better off in terms of inclusion, diversity celebration, and decreased institutional discrimination.

    • Anonymous

      I vote ONLY based on the economy and have zero interest re abortion, gay marriage or whatever else. I too hate the democrats swing towards being way too progressive and socialistic. I’m hoping it’s fake and just to appease the Bernie voters and all of it is forgotten once HRC is in office; or there’s a GOP House/Senate that won’t let it pass. Sorry but I have zero interest in a tax on trading to pay public college tuitions for families making 125k/yr; if that particular plan passes, this will have been the last time I’ll ever vote democrat.

      • Hermonine

        I know I shouldn’t take the bait…but how do you have “zero interest re abortion, gay marriage or whatever else” ?

      • Alanna of Trebond

        I sort of understand this position, because I am privileged though not white. I HATE the college tuition forgiveness plan and think that it is bad for the economy. I am ok with, over time, working to make tuition lower.

        Also, I am pro other social positions that do affect me – i.e., paid maternity leave and subsidized child care, equal pay for women.

    • Midwest Mama

      Only somewhat related…..does anyone think Trump will actually drop out of the race before November? I keep seeing the headlines but have no idea how much truth is behind them.

      • Senior Attorney

        I don’t think he will drop out but I swear, every day or so Lovely Fiance and I look at each other and say “He’s just punking us. He’s totally punking us. Kicking a baby out of a campaign rally? Nobody would do that unless they were just… totally punking us!”

        • Ugh Trump

          I hate Trump but I LOL’d at first about Trump kicking out a crying baby. Haven’t we all fantasized about doing that somewhere? Like in a movie theater or on an airplane. We are all generally nice people so we wouldn’t do it but we wish we could. So for a few seconds I thought “ahhh, he’s living the dream.” But then when I read what he really did, it was just plain sadistic. First he said he loved babies and the baby could stay. Then he said no, get that baby out of there. Then he made fun of the mom for actually believing him when he said it was okay and that of course it wasn’t. That’s humiliating.

          • Anonymous

            That was the worst part for sure. If he’d just immediately been annoyed and said “Take the crying baby out of here” well, that’s not typical politician behavior, but it’s pretty relatable to most people. But telling her “Oh I love babies, the baby can stay, a baby’s cry is beautiful” and then turning around and mocking her mercilessly because she took him at his word is just unspeakably cruel (and textbook Trump).

      • Anonymous

        the GOP might wish that he does but based on what we’ve seen so far I don’t think his ego would allow it

      • Anonymous

        I def don’t think he’d drop out under pressure from GOP establishment, which is what the current “will Trump drop out” discussion is centering around. He seems way too stubborn to do that. I do think there’s a non-zero chance that if he wins, he will decline to serve and Mike Pence would become President. And honestly, as much as I despise Mike Pence (and I despise him a lot), I think that would be better. Pence would be a terrible president who would undo a lot of the progress made under Obama, but he’s not going to start a nuclear war.
        Mark Cuban said that Trump wants to win the popular vote but not the electoral college, so he’s a “winner” but doesn’t actually have to do anything, and I think there may be some truth to that.

    • Anon

      I have similar political beliefs to yours and I’m voting for Hillary precisely because she’s not Donald Trump.

    • Anonymous

      My thought is if you vote for bigots, you’re a bigot. If your pocketbook is more important than gay marriage, you aren’t pro gay marriage. You’re just another sanctimonious white rich person in it for herself.

      • anonymous

        Ummm…isn’t gay marriage legal already? My “pocketbook” lol is not more important than gay marriage. But thanks for being a vicious, bigoted troll.

          • anonymous too

            Breaking news – Supreme Court Declares Same-Sex Marriage Legal In All 50 States

            June 26, 201510:05 AM ET

        • A.non

          Everyone has their priorities. I want to add that although same-sex marriage is legal across the USA, gay people are not a protected class when it comes to housing and employment discrimination.

          The attitude expressed by Anon @ 4:03 is part of the reason why some women who are poor, working class, middle class, LGBT, disabled, and/or not-white do not support Clinton to the same degree her race/gender/education/class counterparts did in 2008 or now.

  12. Mascara

    Anyone have a favorite mascara to recommend?

    Ideally something I can wash off with soap and water but relatively smudgeproof

    • jwalk

      Covergirl Clump Crusher. Not water proof and probably not smudge-proof if you were really going at your eye, but it doesn’t smudge during the day for me with normal wear and is very easy to remove. Plus, the lash length!!!

    • Anon in NYC

      I really like Make Up Forever Smoky Extravagant Mascara. You can buy a travel size from Sephora, too.

    • Anonymous

      I like Maybelline Lash Sensational — but you’ll need a chisel to get off the waterproof version, so stick with the regular. Totally smudgeproof IME.

      • Brunette Elle Woods

        I second Maybelline Lash Sensational. It’s the best. I tried Dior, cover girl, etc and I always come back to Maybelline.

    • BB

      I like Blinc – it’s a “tubing” mascara (makes tiny tubes over your eyelashes vs. sticking to them) which some people love and some people hate. I love it – it’s very not clumpy and washes off easily in the shower.

  13. Anyone like COS?

    I really want to like their minimalist clothes but am trying to figure out if my body type (5’3, busty!) would work well with their cut. Anyone a fan and can comment?

      • Snoozy

        Actually, I’m shorter and bustier, and find their stuff does work, at least in dresses – basically, I go with their most sack-like or straight-cut options, and let my figure give them shape. This season isn’t fantastic, though.

  14. pear rant

    Warning: superficial rant ahead.

    I am so sick of being majorly pear-shaped. I am HUGE in my butt/hips/thighs and smaller everywhere else. Dresses and pants never fit. I feel so dumpy and out of proportion, like I can never look sleek and chic. I know this is silly, but I always compare myself to everyone else and come up short. All the weight I gain only goes there so I look even worse.

    It’s just the body I have and I appreciate it for what it can do for me, but sometimes I just wish it looked different. /rantover

    • "Ruler" here

      Hey pear, guess what? I am so envious of women like you! I’m a ruler – absolutely NO curves to speak of. Clothes also don’t fit me very well. I think this is a case of “grass is greener” but I get the frustrations that come from having a hard to clothe body type. But seriously – I’m sure as a pear you have lots of secret admirers like me who do not think you’re dumpy.

    • Yes...

      Fellow pear here.

      Yup, yup, yup.

      I have to tailor every single item. Obviously I can’t afford this, so I never look sharp.

      Figure out the few brands that are your friends, that have curvy fits. Shift dresses, with the occasional A line with lots of stretch fabrics.

      Belts are your friends.

      Go to YouLookFab, and read her recs for pears.

    • Pears

      I am the peariest of the pears and my god I love Ann Taylor! The (non-sheath, duh, lol) dresses fit perfectly. Also Eileen Fisher shift dresses somehow fit both my A cups and my Kardashian bottom.

  15. Anonymous

    Does this site have a search feature? Asked a question a while back re Doctor recs, got good ones, didn’t write them down thinking I’d return to the thread and now of course I have no idea which of the 10-20 weekly threads it was in or even which week.

    • Moonstone

      I think the search only covers the actual blog post, not the comments. You can do it on google:
      site:www.nameofthiswebsite.com search term

  16. Furniture

    I’m in love with the bedroom furniture at Room & Board and CB, but I know it is out of my price range. I tried a few unfinished furniture shops thinking I could have it stained similar to the styles I like, but didn’t really find anything terribly exciting. I really don’t want to put together my own bedroom furniture (so no Wayfair). What reasonable priced options am I missing?

      • Aunt Jamesina

        Yup. A lot of authentic midcentury pieces will have a similar feel to those stores, but at a much better price (and, especially in the case of C&B, much better quality than new). I’ve bought a few very gently used Room and Board pieces on Craigslist for a fraction of the original price. They’re fantastic quality.

    • Anonymous

      Cost Plus World Market has some great furniture and everything I’ve bought there has been really well made. I think there might be some assembly required, but I’m sure you can hire someone to help you with that as well.

      • Senior Attorney

        Yes, re-think the assemble-it-yourself furniture. If you have Task Rabbit in your area you can hire somebody to do it pretty inexpensively.

      • Marie

        Craigslist for now, and save your money for the well-built furniture you really want. West Elm, CB2, and the like use a lot of plywood and particle board. They’re really not too many steps up from Ikea in terms of construction, in my experience.

        • Marie

          Whoops, that was supposed to be a reply to the OP, not to Anonymous at 4:39 pm. I didn’t mean to sound like I was objecting to Cost Plus, which does have surprisingly well-made, solid-wood furniture!

    • AZCPA

      None of the furniture I’ve purchased at Wayfair has required assembly. A couple of pieces have need to have the drawer handles screwed on, but that is it. I believe you can search for whether assembly is required in their search feature.

  17. Anon for This

    Let’s decide between three hypothetical jobs based on the following assumptions: (you are a part time mom of two preschoolers considering having a third; (2) you are pretty much entirely burnt out on the billable hour system (3) you love the city you live in and don’t want to move; (4) you have to make at least 100K / year; (5) you have some student loan debt and some personal debt but overall finances are in order if you make that $100K / year; (6) City You Love is HCOL relative to most cities in your area.

    Now for the potential jobs:

    (A) Start your own firm (law) with a moderate book of business. At the time business starts, have about 1/2 of the workload you need to make $100K; be able to work part time, from home (common in your geographic area, even in law for solos). Know you have to build the business over the first year to about double your book. Work will be billed by the hour. You may miss going to an office. You won’t have much support staff. You risk burning bridges with your only potential employer in City You Love if you leave current job to do this. Risks and limitations of being solo.

    (B) Take a job with a municipality. No billable hour requirements, no litigation, so lower stress and time. Salary is lower than you have had in 5 years and lower than 100K. You have to move away from City You Love but to a lower cost of living city. Benefits are great.

    (C) Start new firm with a partner. Work will be hybrid billable hour and contingency. Will require taking on significant debt in the first year, but business plan is solid and should turn profitability corner in 18 or so months. More support staff and physical office space (also why we need to undertake more debt than in the solo option). Limited by partner’s limitations, but security of having a partner. Will make $100K from revenue in 1st year, but will have to pay self (and partner) minimum necessary from business’s line of credit until then.

    Thoughts? Which one would you take? Which one could you absolutely rule out? Why?

    • Anonymous

      Are you high? I’d take none of them

      A- lol at doubling your book of business. You’ll probably lose money.

      B- nope. You can’t afford it.

      C- srsly? Whatever job you have no, and I am assuming you work at a firm, pays you regularly and hasn’t required a capital contribution. And you still haven’t gotten your act together to pay off your consumer debt? But somehow think you can afford to take on even more debt?

      All of this is cray. Keep your job.

      • Anon for This

        A. Let’s assume doubling is feasible. That really only amounts to 25-30 hours of work. Not that difficult.

        B. This is probably odd, but due to change in COL, this is most affordable option. I have over $200K equity in my house – which would buy a house 100% cash in LCOL city for municipal job plus pay off (very minor amount – < $5K) of consumer debt. Student loans, yes… its a thing but also less than $10K.

        C. Do most businesses not take on debt to start? Some risk is worth taking, no…?

        I get that you may just think I'm crazy but I thought I'd clarify / ask a few questions because I do appreciate you responding…. but I think some things were assumed that aren't true in your response.

        • Anonymous

          A- let’s not. Because that is a massive assumption. Assume you don’t double and in fact lose some of your current clients. Do you still like option A?

          B- ok that makes sense/ but you love current city so how is this better than keeping your job

          C- absolutely most businesses take on debt. Most small businesses also fail. Can you afford that?

      • CKB

        Yeah, the part time mom comment bugged me. As a full time working mom of 3, just because I work does not mean I’m not a full time mom.

    • Blonde Lawyer

      Contingency takes years to pay out. If you need 100k/year I wouldn’t rely on contingency cases for your revenue. I really don’t like any of your three options. I would recommend option D. Reach out to firms that deal with your expertise. Suggest a staff attorney position, 70% hours at 100k.

      Look for firms that are missing what you do but have it ancillary to their cases. For example, a PI firm that doesn’t have anyone doing workers comp.

      You mentioned municipal law. Tons of firms want to have someone on hand that can deal with the unique municipal hurdles that crop up in all of their cases. You would become their on-call person for those issues. A PI case on town property may have immunity issues for example.

      Look at small to medium sized firms. Firms without big management committees are far more likely to agree to unique arrangements. You can work out an origination bonus for the book that you are bringing.

        • Anon for This

          I appreciate your constructive comments.

          I am at a medium firm and could do 70% time here. The problem is I bring in a lot of my own business. I would love to go 50-70% time here, but then the pay is hourly and about a fifth of my hourly rate. Since those are my clients in the first place, how does it make any economic sense to take 1/5 of the pay and give 80% to the firm. And get no origination credit / credit for those being my own files. I kind of can’t stomach that part….

          Example: If I work 50 hours / month on a contract basis I make $2500 / mo.

          If I work 50 hours on my own, I bill those same clients $12,500. (this is all billable – non-contingency work)

          Help me make that math work…. truly, going on your own is scary, but… math.

          • Blonde Lawyer

            You go to another mid-size or small firm. That’s the number one reason lawyers change from one firm to another to basically do the exact same job. It’s the money. So you go to the managing partners and your competitor firms and say you are thinking of making a switch but this is what you would need to make the switch. You can probably find one that will give you origination credit or at least a better slice of your own pie.

            The ideal staff attorney position would have no billable hours tied to it and they are paying for your availability basically on a set number of days and set number of hours. You could negotiate, however, a bonus if you did bill over x hours plus a percent of origination.

            A common number I hear thrown around is for non-origination billables, you get 1/3rd of everything over 3 times your receivables. So, if they pay you a $100k salary, once you have $300k in receivables (based off your billable hours, not origination) then you start getting 1/3rd of every other dollar that comes. You could argue you get 1/3rd of everything originated from the get-go, without hitting a minimum of billables but they would likely want to reduce your base salary for that type of arrangement.

          • Blonde Lawyer

            Edit for clarify – don’t go to the managing partner at your firm. That won’t help. Go to managing partners at the competitor firms to feel out moving over is what I was trying to say.

          • Blonde Lawyer

            You are welcome. My posts were a little confusing. I was multi tasking as evidenced by my typos. The arrangement I was trying to suggest is base salary and once your receivables surpass 3 times your salary you get 1/3rd of your receivables as a bonus the rest of the year. Plus some other structure for origination.

    • Scarlett

      I’d rule out B just because it’s not in city you love & that’s a factor I’m personally unwilling to compromise on. My husband did A & it’s worked out well. I think it’s even better if you start with a book. I’d also consider C – the hardest part of A is not having a partner & if you have someone you’d enjoy working with, I’d probably really try to make that work. There’s also a lot of ways to structure those arrangements, so you might be able to do it in a way that’s a combo of A & C. The only caveat to all of this (& it may not make a difference if you’re already working at a law firm) is that A & C are really likely to be 100%+ full time jobs. Building and keeping business is time consuming (all the networking, speaking, talking, chatting with people, keeping up over email, doing intake, etc.) & your business might not grow as fast as you’d like it to. So, I’d still do A or C, but I’d also probably look to see if there’s anything you can do lifestyle wise to cut back so the 100K target is less necessary & I’d also probably stop at 2 kids and not add a newborn into the mix.

  18. Banks

    I am going to Boston and looking for cheaper things to do. My sister and I like to drink, we don’t really like museums, and we will have a car. Neither of us have ever been. We will be there this coming Tuesday through Friday. TIA Bostonerettes!!

    • LAJen

      Go do the tour of the Harpoon Brewery! They make beers you can only get in New England, and it’s really fun. Sometimes they also have events. It’s FAR better beer than Sam Adams, which you should skip. It’s super cheap and you get to taste lots of their beers (and since it’s summer, have Raspberry UFO for me). Also, the Freedom Trail is free and is basically a walking tour of the historical spots in Boston…and because it’s Boston, there are billions of pubs to stop into along the way. Grab a cannoli at Mike’s Pastry in the North End. Don’t let anyone tell you it’s too touristy or isn’t worth the wait–I lived in Boston for years, and their cannoli is WORTH IT.

    • Anon

      Join the Facebook group Secret Boston and ask them.

      Look at Boston.com

      MFA, Isabella Stuart Gardner Museum. Take a Duck Tour (pricy) or a ferry to some of the Harbor Islands.

      Use Groupon to get a cheap Whale Watching coupon.

    • Anonymous

      Boston is great for just walking around. Walk around 1) North End, Faneuil/freedom trail and 2) Charles St (stop at Tatte for lower priced lunch or a pastry), Boston Common and Public Garden, and the Back Bay. You can spend a considerable amount of time doing those two routes.

      Another inexpensive idea is a picnic on the esplanade (conceal drinking in coffee to-go cups). Lawn on D is a fun area outside to hang out in in Southie and the beers are reasonably priced.

      There are no drink specials here, fyi, so drinking might be more expensive that you are used to depending on where you are coming from.

  19. Babs

    Confidential to “Bostonerettes”: watch out for stylish & overachieving drunk drivers this coming Tuesday-Friday!

    • Anonymous

      Not funny. I hope ‘rettes have enough common sense to NOT mix booze and driving. Uber is cheap, yeah?

    • OP

      We aren’t drinking and driving! We parked our car but if there was anything worth seeing that we couldn’t get to by public transit or uber we do have a car. That’s all I meant.

  20. KS

    Outfit question: I’ve recently graduated and am about to start my first proper job as a lawyer. I’m a fairly classic dresser anyway and love a good silk shirt, but I tend to wear a lot of oversized clothes. I wondered whether that is appropriate or best avoided, at least at the start of the career. For example, I have this dress (http://www.cosstores.com/gb/Shirt_dress_with_slits/228955-39575524.1#c-22755) in navy and really like it, but am unsure if it would be work-appropriate. I was also considering getting this shirt (http://assets.vogue.com/photos/55c650d308298d8be216d107/master/pass/001fullscreen.jpg), perhaps to wear with a black wool skirt or with a suit. Any thoughts?

    • Anonymous

      I would avoid oversized clothing like these as a newbie lawyer (FWIW, I’m in Silicon Valley). As a newbie, you want to blend in with the other newbie lawyers and not stick out. This clothing is really oversized and just doesn’t fit the models. Even women who dress modestly for religious reasons don’t wear oversize clothing to the office.

      At least in the firms I’ve worked at, wearing this type of clothing would start rumors that you are part of a religious cult or other weird stuff. That is not the impression you want to be making.

    • Nope.

      The cos link isn’t working. From their dresses, I would only consider the “belted jersey dress” and only on casual Fridays.

      Good luck!

      • KS

        Interesting – I thought a few of the knee-length dresses with sleeves might’ve worked with professional accessories and in particular heels to balance things out, at least on non-client facing days. Thankfully I’ve erred on the side of caution when shopping for a work wardrobe!

        The potential of religious cult rumours made me laugh.

          • Wildkitten

            (And I consider myself a baby lawyer, 4 years in. I will dress like Diane Lockhart when I have made it.)

          • LAJen

            California is different–in BigLaw, we don’t wear suits except on court days or with clients. Wear a suit the first day, and then look at what other junior associates are wearing. It’s probably business casual (e.g. pants or a dress with a non-matched blazer or cardigan). Especially so in Silicon Valley, where the clients are more casual.

  21. Short arms

    I have been trying to refresh my work wardrobe after a year away from my closet due to pregnancy and have run into an issue that I feel wasn’t there before. I am petite (5’2″, 120ish) but even with petite options I’m having a problem of shirt and blazer sleeves being way too long. Like sloppy “mom’s shirt” too long. Part of it is I’ve gone up a size or two after baby but is this how clothes are made? Do you get longer sleeves with larger sizes? What are my options? Do I just factor $25 in alterations for every piece or is there a trick to this? I look in the mirror and don’t feel like my arms are crazy short!

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