Coffee Break: Mosaic Bag

74 Comments

1. Help! Does anyone have tips on making it through a super busy and stressful period? I’m on my 12th straight day of work (and have to work tomorrow too), half of which was on a work trip that had me working 12-14 hour days. I got home “late” (for me) last night and then leave after work tomorrow for a ski/bachlorette trip for my BFF. Tonight is my mom’s birthday so I have family dinner and also need to visit a beloved relative who is on hospice on my way to dinner. I’m exhausted.

   I’ve been trying to have produce and protein at each meal, get a full night’s sleep, have my water intake outpace my coffee/alcohol intake, and make sure I’m getting in some movement each day (but not at the expense of sleep!).

   Work trip popped up last minute, otherwise I would have done my best to not schedule a crazy work trip right before the ski trip. And, obviously, no one plans hospice.

   1. Heavy metal and rap

   2. bare minimum of everything else. my family (fortunately) doesn’t do family dinners on a weeknight. obviously i understand that you don’t want to cancel on your mom, but maybe in the future to schedule less during the week leading up to a trip? it sounds like you are already doing everything you can!

      1. Unfortunately, work trip was planned/approved one day before I left. I work in humanitarian aid – so as you can imagine this is a particularly busy/stressful time in my field. But, even in “better” times, trips do not come with advance warning.

         Normally a weeknight dinner is fine (when not traveling for work I work 9-5; my parents live a quick 30 min train ride/40 min drive away). I think in different circumstances I’d tell my mom I’m going to rain check, but her brother is the one on hospice so she’s going through a lot.

         1. Your mom does not want to add to your stress. She would likely understand if you had to cancel.

            1. I would never, ever cancel on my mom on her birthday while her brother is on hospice. Cancel something else first.

            2. What? No, your mom is not last priority when her brother is also dying. Shame on you for this suggestion.

            3. What? No, OP has this right. OP, my solution is coffee and as much sleep as you can get.

   3. The ski trip will sort it out. Have fun!!!

      1. Thank you, looking forward to it! I’m an enthusiastic but meh at best skier, but it’ll be with a great group of our college friends and a nice distraction from everything else going on. And plenty of much-needed “apres ski”.

         1. I’m a huge believer in active hobbies/excursions and social time being MUCH more restorative than “downtime” at home (in most cases). I bet you’ll come back tired in a good way this time.

            1. Maybe for you.

            2. 100! The ski trip is the solution here.

            3. Yes, for me, and everyone else I’ve talked to who has tried it :) I’ve never met anyone who felt restored after a full weekend of bedrotting.

   4. I’m working from home today (I don’t typically) after an extended business trip. I have SO MUCH on my plate. But, at 11am I booked an 11:30 facial at my favorite place around the corner, took a roughly 1 hr 15 min “lunch” and I’m feeling a whole lot better about life. I’m drowning at the moment, but all the guys take an hour for the gym daily (how, I have no idea..) so I said eff it.

      I invite you to similarly say “eff it” and do the thing that will give your spirits a little lift. I might get a pedi tomorrow when WFH again. I figure the hour spent today/tomorrow on me will lift my spirits, improve my productivity and then some.

      1. Thank you! I will definitely get a chair massage or something during lunch tomorrow.

   5. I’m assuming you feel like you can’t afford to get sick right now. I know there’s a lot of back and forth about the efficacy of vitamins, but I find them helpful. And, both my PCP and my registered dietician recommended them.

      So, I take a daily women’s multi vitamin. On the dietician’s recommendation I also take magnesium (good for stress and sleep!), B12 (I have a deficiency), and this time of year Vitamin D. Once I started doing that I get sick way less frequently.

      When I’m particularly worn down or feeling not 100% I take an Airborne tablet. I know it’s not proven, but I swear Airborne has helped me fight off several illnesses over the past few years.

   6. You’re doing a great job as is. Some other things that help me: taking 5 minutes to stretch or do gentle yoga. I work out a lot, but I don’t often take as much time as I should to stretch. When I work long hours or travel a lot (basically more sitting than usual), I get super tight and sore and this helps a lot. Likewise, if you can find the time and afford it: a massage. Even just a 15 min chair massage at the nail salon is helpful!

      I normally drink plain water, but if I’m having trouble getting enough it’s good to remind myself of other options: fruit infused, La Croix, etc.

      When things are chaotic I try to start my day with a smoothie: hydration, fruits and veggies, protein (powder) and good fats (PB, chia seeds, milk) help a lot! I love adding cucumber to mine for the hydration. Even if the rest of my day goes to sh!t, I’ve had one good meal. I also love that it takes 3 mins to throw together (when I’m not busy I prep smoothie-ready baggies). I keep some shelf stable and “not terrible” food at my desk or in my car for “balanced-ish” meals: I too often rely on a meal of a bottled protein shake, dried fruit or a hearty fruit like an apple, nuts. Ideally I can get a great big salad, grain bowl, or other meal for my 3rd meal of the day, but if not, at least I had 2 passable meals.

      Take a few minutes here and there to zone out or have fun: silly Instagram reels, a fun podcast while driving, quick call to a friend.

   7. I don’t get as restful sleep when the air is super dry, as it is right now. I find running a humidifier makes me feel so much better. I sleep better, I feel less dry, and my sinuses are much, much happier.

      Hard to do on the road (though they do make travel ones I have traveled with!), but should help you tonight.

   8. Outsource anything I can. Time saved is more valuable right now.

      The exhaustion you feel is also likely emotional. You probably feel like you don’t want to disappoint anyone and it’s taking a toll. The family stuff can’t be negotiated away, but make sure your friend knows you also need rest during this trip. Sleeping in and missing an activity so you feel less overwhelmed are not going to ruin a trip.

      Set aside the other life management things for when you get back.

2. What are the winter equivalent of linen pants? Comfy, can be dressed up or down, versatile? I wear linen pants constantly in the summer, but don’t have a good equivalent for winter. I do wear a lot of ponte in the winter, but I don’t think it dresses down as well as linen.

   1. Lined Athleta Brooklyns?

   2. Black jeans with stretch

   3. Stretch cords from Talbots or JM McLaughlin.

      1. This, too. Mine are from Kut from the Cloth.

   4. I have been wearing silky pants but in SEUS where it is generally warm and in a car city where we are not outside a lot if it is cold.

   5. the Spanx AirSense ones are really good, maybe I’m delusional but I think they can be dressed up as much as linen pants. I just wish they had pockets!!

3. I have a purse question. I finally got a spendy nylon bag (think used Prada or MZ Wallace). It’s winter and I’m slathering on the moisturizer every time I wash my hands. Won’t I leave an oily smudge on the handle of the purse and any parts my hands touch over time? I am now second-guessing what I thought would be a carefree purchase. I never really wrecked a leather bag with my moisturizing and in week 1 of ownership I am really trying not to touch the bag or towel off my palms to get any excess off before touching my bag.

   1. I’ve had a lot of nylon bags and have never noticed it… if it’s a used bag and doesn’t already have those marks then I think you’re fine. What was the resale market like for those? if lots of options then they’re probably pretty hard to screw up.

      if you want something lightweight but washable highly recommend the Rothy’s bags.

   2. If you do get anything on it, I highly recommend saddle soap for anything leather and Dawn dishwashing liquid for anything nylon.

4. I’m staring at two thiiiick sirloin steaks in my fridge that were supposed to go on my grill, but failed to consider the fact that I can’t get to said grill because it’s buried in 2 feet of snow and probably frozen shut. They’re small (supposed to be an individual portion each, so size of my fist?) and about 2 inches, maybe more, thick.

   Naturally, the steaks have an expiration date of today. What’s the best way to cook these indoors tonight? I’m not really feeling steak but my little kids will crush these. So, not looking for a gourmet execution but the thickness scares me that I will overcook them… ideas?

   1. Crank up the heat on the biggest burner on your stove as high as it goes and cook on a screaming hot pan (preferably cast iron) like you would on a grill. Make sure to turn on the fan first :)

   2. Cast iron pan but crank up your air purifier and open the windows (even if it’s cold). We have an air quality monitor indoors and cooking steaks on the stove put us into Mumbai-on-a-bad-day levels in no time.

      1. Yes–sear brown w a cast iron on the stove and then stick them in a hot oven, the internet will give you the right time per oz. And yes, it will help to open the windows and turn off the smoke alarm.

         1. So I am not the only one who sets off the smoke detector when cooking a steak?! Feel so much better. I have monitored security and a fire truck actually came once! (which I feel terrible about to this day)

   3. You could do a reverse sear–start in the oven for fairly low for like 15-20 minutes then put in a very hot pan for a minute or two per side.

   4. Salt and pepper. Sear steak on all sides on hot cast iron, then finish in the oven. You’ll have to look up exact oven times for how well done you want them.

   5. Throw them in the freezer?

   6. To me reverse sear is the easiest approach to indoor steak. Or you could forego the steak concept, slice it up, and make something Asian.

      1. Seconding this if you want to avoid setting off the smoke alarm. Cut the meat into “steak tips” size chunks or super thin slices and make stir-fry with whatever vegetables you have handy.

   7. Can you cut them in half so they are not so thick?
      If not, definitely do the reverse sear, or slice them thinly and saute.

   8. Cast iron sear, finish in the oven

   9. It’s unfashionable to broil now, but please remember your broiler is just an upside-down grill. Preheat the broiler pan in a hot oven to get grill marks, then broil quite close to the element. That’s what it’s for!

5. ugh i hate when you check out and accidentally make an account on Square or Shop — they’re sooooo annoying.

6. No, this is not a normal birthday dinner, it is showing up for her mom in a difficult time

   1. I get the feeling OP knows this. It’s other commenters who get the major side-eye from me.

7. This morning’s thread on aging made me feel really sad. Lots of internalized misogyny. I really want to register my disagreement that if you are not covering gray hair or injecting botox, that you are letting yourself “go to hell.” That’s just not true and I feel sorry for folks who feel such pressure to look artificially young (especially when we know men aren’t held to the same beauty standards).

   1. “Aging isn’t even one percent as scary as whatever is going on with the people who try not to.”

      Like, look after your health and all, but there’s a big difference between exercising/wearing clothes that fit and getting botox/fillers/spending hundreds on hair dyes and lotions.

      1. Right—like yes, my grey hair might make me look the age I actually am, but no one is fooled by hair dye (or fake lashes, overdone makeup, extensions) If people notice you covering up grey hair you should have, they’re just going to assume other things about you are artificial.

         1. Bad take, lady.

   2. I’ll bite as I made some of those comments. It’s not internalized misogyny or any other internet meme of the day. I’m an attractive person, always have been and like it that way. I also see people who could look ankit better and probably feel a lot better about themselves with a little maintenance. Grey hair ages everyone. Men included.

      1. Wow. That’s… a response for sure.

      2. So you’re just arrogant. Got it.

      3. You just equated “better” with “younger.” This is a bias on your part you should examine seriously.

      4. My husband looks great with grey hair. Much better than if he dyed it. I also have grey hair and don’t dye it. I don’t mind looking my age (as a lawyer I think it actually helps) and I don’t think I would necessarily look or feel “better” if I dyed my hair. I look and feel fine.

      5. I like finally not looking like a fresh undergrad. My body is wash and go; I can difference my time and money on things that matter to me regardless of whether you think I need “maintenance.” It’s really weird that you think of aging as a bad thing.

         1. *dedicate, not difference

      6. Equating a woman’s self-worth to their appearance isn’t misogyny if the woman in question is yourself. Excellent logic there.

         1. Yeah, that’s just not true.

      7. I hope you are not the one giving the super long list of things you do to finally say it was genetics.

      8. You committed the cardinal sin of being attractive and liking it. Of course you’re getting ripped apart.

   3. Agreed. I could 100% look better if I invested thousands in expensive procedures and maintenance activities but it’s not going to make me happier. No one is approaching me for a modeling contract or an Instagram campaign – it’s fine to look average and spend my money doing what I love.

      1. I land here—who is my audience for this? Who am I trying to fool? And are they fooled? Live a decent life and that will make more difference to your appearance than a box of hair dye.

         1. Judging women for dying their hair is also misogyny. I don’t dye my hair to fool anyone. I dye it so my face doesn’t look washed out.

      2. It’s a slippery slope honestly. Somewhere between good skincare and ending up looking like Lauren Sanchez. Where does “good enough” fall?

         And people with all of those treatments aren’t fooling anyone. My friends who get laser/IPL occasionally & maybe a little botox between the brows look fine, but when you head down the lip injections/cheek filler/brow lift road it stops being subtle. No one’s buying it.

   4. In my opinion, internalized misogyny is a term used to put down women who make choices other than the ones you make for yourself.
      It’s gentrified name calling.

      Commenting that other women are letting themselves “go to hell” isn’t better behavior.

      There’s a middle way – not judging others for doing what makes them feel good.

      1. Hard disagree. Women dogging other women for not starving themselves into a prepubescent state and using toxins to all erase all evidence of aging? That’s 100 percent internalized misogyny.

         1. Your examples are extreme outliers. Not engaging with the substance of what women shared this morning.

      2. No one said other women are letting it all go to hell, that commenter was clearly referencing her own personal point of view.

         1. Except they doubled down above? Said “I also see people who could look ankit [sic] better and probably feel a lot better about themselves with a little maintenance.” Clearly she’s applying the logic to others, not just herself.

   5. I don’t think you’re letting yourself go to hell, but I also have dark hair and want to keep it that way for now. I’m in my mid-40s. I don’t want highlights because I don’t like the way they look. So yes, I’m having my hair colored very often to hide the gray. Maybe when I’m closer to 60 I’ll feel differently.

8. I’ve normally be fine with the cold weather. This year it’s been so cold and my next 10 days doesn’t show a reprieve.

   This has just sucked. No other word for it.

   1. Agree. Even just having the ice melt would make life a bit better.

   2. I live in the upper Midwest so the snow is pretty standard for us. The 2”+ of solid ice on every road, with no grit or powder for traction? In a metro area where we can’t run tire chains? That’s the suckiest part for me.

      Hang in there, we will get through this.

Comments are closed.