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Updated: Nov 1, 2018 182 Comments · by

Suit of the Week: DSquared2

Suit of the Week

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Dsquared2 SuitFor busy working women, the suit is often the easiest outfit to throw on in the morning. In general, this feature is not about interview suits for women, which should be as classic and basic as you get — instead, this feature is about the slightly different suit that is fashionable, yet professional. I don't normally think of Dsquared as a great brand for suits — for some reason I think of them as being a really edgy sportswear brand. But oh: I love this suit. According to Yoox, it's primarily made of virgin wool, mohair wool, and silk — which tells me that it's going to have some weight to it, and hopefully be super soft. I love the leather accents (that leather bow in back!) and the tweed effect in general. Wow. Gorgeous. It's $648 at Yoox: lucky size 4 only, alas.
(L-5)

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Comments

  1. Amelia Pond

    I am meh about this suit.
    But I have a suit related TJ. I bought a new black suit recently and it has a pocket on the upper left by the lapel. I have never had a suit with a pocket here, but I really want to wear a pocket square. Not for interviews but maybe in place of a statement necklace. I love pocket squares on guys and would love to rock a pink or patterned square with an otherwise boring suit. I have never seen a gal wearing one, but can it be done? Are pocket squares allowed for ladies?

    • R in Boston

      Love pocket squares. I try to rock them when possible (i feel like my jcrew suits have a pocket there? something i own does, at least). I say go for it.

    • Quiche

      I just saw a blog post talking about this! She rocks pocket squares all the time, and while I haven’t seen anyone do it in my city it does look great on her so I assume it would look great on you too. Won’t link to avoid moderation, but check out Alterations Needed.

      • Amelia Pond

        I think this is the first time in my life I have been in front of a trend!

    • Brooklyn, Esq.

      A senior partner where I work does this. She is a force of nature. If you have a similarly strong personality, I’d say do it.

    • Amelia Pond

      Excellent! I may swing by the store to find something fun to wear tomorrow!

    • qwerty

      the blogger for “alternations needed” has a formal and menswear inspired aesthetic and she wears pocket squares all the time. it’s cute!

  2. Molly Porter

    This is a beautiful suit, but isn’t it a bit showy for most of us working stiffs? I could totally see it on a c-level exec or other high-level powerful businesslady.

    • Senior Attorney

      I don’t know what c-level is, but I’m pretty senior (hence the name) and I would totally wear this suit! If I spent that much on suits, which I don’t. ;)

  3. Woods-comma-Elle

    I’m reposting from earlier and thanks for the responses so far, Vancouver I was asking about the best way to tell my firm about taking the bar in a different jurisdiction which isn’t going to benefit the firm. I will paste my original query below and although I appreciate the advice not to tell my firm, this really isn’t an option. For one, I need my vacation time approved by my supervising partner who will ask why I want to book time off so far in advance (I do not want to lie, see below). And, my firm offers study leave and I will want to take it as it is additional to vacation days and, again, it needs to be approved by boss. Also, some people already know I want to take the exam and i don’t want to be in a situation where haven’t told my boss and he finds out some other way.

    Anyway, on that additional note, ways to approach this appreciated where not telling isn’t an option. Thanks guys!

    *****

    As some of you will know, I am currently living, and qualified, in England and I’m thinking about the CA bar exam in February. I have pretty much made up my mind to do it, but now the issue is I have to tell my firm. I do not expect my firm to contribute financially in any way (although I might be lucky, but someone else just did the NY bar and didn’t get anything paid for them), but obviously I will need cooperation in terms of the requisite time off etc. I work in a small team for two partners, Partner A and Partner B, whom I get on with really well, particularly Partner A, who thinks I’m a superstar and doesn’t actually know how to cope on a daily basis without me (a whole other problem altogether). However, Partner A has a bit of a tendency to act like a spoilt brat and fly off the handle at times. I expect his reaction to be (1) outrage that I don’t think working in his team is good enough that I need to do this exam (2) failure to understand why I would want to do this when in his view it will have no use to me whatsoever (3) paralytic fear that I will quit my job and move to California and (4) snide comments about how I will be far too busy in the next six months to do it. I am thinking that the way to deal with this is not to make a big deal out of it and certainly not make it sound like I am asking for permission. Once it has been sorted days-off wise, I don’t plan to mention it again and certainly don’t want to give Partner A any reason to question my commitment at work on account of it. I think I would simply say I am going to do the exam and I will need xy and z days off. I don’t actually want to sign up and pay for bar prep until I have the days off sorted, but I am also concerned that unless I tell my boss that I have already signed up for something, he will think I am asking for permission (and I do not want to give him that impression) and will say no. I appreciate that this is very much a know-your-boss situation, but I would love some input from people who have had a similar situation before and, even if you haven’t, I would welcome your thoughts.

    • Anonymouse

      I am sorry, but why are you reposting when people already responded to you in another thread? Newsflash: this site isn’t all about you!

      • Woods-comma-Elle

        Wow thanks so much for that anonymous, I’m so grateful for your contribution. Since you asked, I posted late on the other thread so not many people responded and on reflection the context wasn’t clear hence I reposted, but I’m really sorry to have offended you.

        • Marilla

          Elle, Anonymouse posted a similar response to someone else reposting from one thread to another a couple days ago. They seem to have anointed themselves the Reposting Police.

          I read your post this morning, and I think you have the right strategy in mind. Tell them, as a neutral fact, not as a dramatic declaration and not asking for permission. (I’ve signed up/am signing up to take the CA bar exam in February. I will need X number of vacation days/days off on dates A, B, and C for courses and the actual exam.) If you think you need to soften it, you could add a sentence about why you want to do this particularly now – whatever reason that isn’t “because I’m totes jumping ship and leaving as soon as possible, suckers!” Maybe because you figure you might as well get this done now before you need it, you know you will want to move back eventually, or it coincides with travel you want to do to the US around the same time.. something neutral.

          Have you asked the person who did the NY bar how they handled it?

          Good luck and also congrats on being a superstar!

          • anonymice

            Actually, anonymouse seems most annoyed about another syndrome: the twits who think their sayings are sooo important that they can’t wait 10mn for moderation. I’m afraid she isn’t alone there.
            Besides, if you need an answer so much or so urgently, you should probably not be using a site instead of a therapist/lawyer/emergency room..

      • L

        This site also isn’t about nasty comments. If you don’t like something, move on.

        As to the topic at hand, can I ask a stupid question? Why do you want to take the bar exam? Is it a lifelong goal or do you potentially want to move there? I think that could help guide your explanation to your boss. Is there any way you would have a legitimate reason to need to be licensed in CA for your current job (business opportunities, access to better professional information/resources)? If there’s an inkling of that, I say start there first.

        Finally, you could always just start off with the positives – I am happy here, I do not want to pick up and move to CA. However I promised myself by the time I was X, I would do this so I will require the following days off. Thanks in advance for your support.

      • Anonymousse

        Why are you being mean about it. Newsflash: this site isn’t about you either! Or me! Or anyone in particular… Let’s chill out a little bit.

        • Senior Attorney

          I think it’s too late to say “let chill out a little bit” after you’ve already posted something nasty, unless it’s preceded by “I’m sorry for my nasty comment above.”

    • Anne Shirley

      Maybe I missed it, but why are you taking the CA bar exam? I think you need to be prepared with a reason that makes it sound like you are taking it for your current job. I’d also be careful not to box yourself in with the one who is likely to fly off the handle- if you think of the conversation more as breaking the ice on the idea with him, it might be easier to handle without him getting really entrenched in his position.

      • M-C

        Yes, not knowing your area of law it’s hard to give you specifics, but if I were you I’d show up with a good line about how this will be helpful for your current firm. International relations always sound good :-). You may also want to hit up partner B first, so you have at least one ally before chipping at the troublesome one, and you can act shocked that pA would see anything wrong with what his partner routinely approved.

    • KLG

      A friend recently had to do this in telling her Biglaw firm she wanted time off to take the bar in a state in which they do not have an office. She basically told the appropriate persons that she is hoping to move to that state someday and figured if she took the bar now, it would be easier to apply in a few years. I’m sure they can read between the lines and realize she’s out as soon as she finds out she passes and starts applying for jobs but this explanation seemed acceptable to the powers that be at her BigLaw firm and has not hurt her assignments, etc. since her return post-bar exam.

  4. Boring Decision to Make

    DH and I have an old, crappy, scratched, chipped dinnerware set from BBB. We had been thinking of upgrading to nice china, but I did the math, and to get dinner plates, salad plates, and soup bowls (we don’t really need the butter plates or teacups and saucers, and the five-piece sets don’t include bowls), we would be paying close to $1,500. (We’d like to get sets of 12 instead of 8 as a cushion for when kids and I break things and/or when we have lots of guests over.) We are having a really hard time justifying paying that amount, although we both have relatively high-paying finance jobs and could afford it. What do you all do (assuming you didn’t register for your wedding)? Is it worth it to get nice dishes when you have little kids and klutzy selves? Do you buy used? Do you splurge? Do you save? Do you get something that is cheaper than china but nicer than college dinnerware? Is there a better season or store to buy? We also happen to be picky, and the options on overstock were not to our liking. Craigslist would involve trekking to view, then having to bring everything home without chipping it. We are at a bit of a loss. Also embarrassed at how much time we are spending making this boring decision. Would love advice.

    • Laura

      I would go for something that may not be as fancy as china, but that you know comes in an enduring pattern. Something like Fiestaware (but not necessarily Fiestaware), which you could buy a set now knowing that if you broke it in 5 years they would still make it.

      My husband and I got stuff from BBB – the basic white dishes, which come individually, are really reasonable and timeless, and all coordinate with each other. We’ve dropped a couple of bowls and a coffee mug, but it’s no big deal because they still carry all of the dishes and are easy to replace. We have even considered starting on a back up set of these in case they ever stop carrying them, as we like them so much and they go with a lot of decor styles.

      • Homestar

        This. I am sort of in love with Le Creuset’s dinnerware at Sur La Table because it is nicer than my target dishes, but it isn’t fine china so I would use it everyday. My Le Creuset pans are pretty sturdy, so I would expect the dishes to be the same even though I haven’t seen them in person. The colors sort of remind me of Fiestaware. I really like the ombre effect on the “Flame” version. For me the Le Creuset would be a splurge, but it is much more reasonable than $1500 china.

    • NOLA

      I would say go for something nicer than college but not fine china. I have my mother’s Noritake china and haven’t used it in years. Fine china isn’t worth it unless you have a ton of it and use it to entertain. You’re better off investing in a set of nicer casual dinnerware. Friends of mine got Fiestaware and got one place setting in each color so they’d never have to worry about replacing a single color. The Noritake dinnerware is also really pretty. I bought a nice set of dishes when I had my first apartment then another set of the same when I got married. I’ve filled in pieces from Replacements so fill out the sets.

    • InfoGeek

      I don’t use bone china for every day. Is that what you’re looking at? We save it for holidays and special occasions.

      I like Fiestaware for daily use. It’s strong and has some weight. You can customize it by choosing 1 or more colors to mix and match. We have cobalt and sunflower and I love those colors together. I had a friend who used red and green for Christmas and just mixed a whole bunch of colors for the rest of the year.

      Our original 5 piece place settings are round, but we’ve added some square luncheon plates and I really like the size and the way the square pieces look.

      Fiestaware is a classic that’s been around a long time and there are tons of accessory pieces available from all sorts of places (Kohl’s, Macy’s, Amazon, etc.).

      It does break, but see the note above about how easy it is to find.

      I see 4 piece place settings (with mugs) or 5 piece place settings (with cup & saucer) for just under $30 each on Amazon. Shipping’s usually pretty expensive because it’s heavy.

      • Senior Attorney

        I LOVE my Fiesta! I have pink, but if I had it to do over again I’d have gotten white. they do discontinue most of the colors eventually, but white seems to be a mainstay. You can always find it discounted somewhere. I got a lot of it on sale at Macy’s. And it is virtually indestructible. I’ve had mine for more than 15 years and have yet to break a piece.

        • Banker

          I am still using my Fiestaware, and no doubt I’m jinxing myself, but I don’t recall one dish breaking in 9-10 years.

        • darjeeling

          I’ve got white Fiesta and it has been great, although it does have some little gray marks on it now after years of use. Another great thing about Fiesta is that there’s a ton of vintage stuff out there so you can supplement a plainer set with a great vintage pitcher or similar.

          • Dorothy

            Those gray marks come off — next time you’re at the grocery store, get a can of cheap-o Bartender’s Friend (yellow can). Scrub those gray marks away with a sponge and some of that powder, and it will look like you have new dishes!

    • SF Bay Associate

      We have Aplico from Williams-Sonoma. It’s lovely and nicer than “regular” dishes, but dishwasher safe. We also eyed the Pottery Barn caterers’ dishes, but we didn’t like the coordinating bowls.

      • LadyEnginerd

        I’ll second this one – the Apilco stuff is awesome if you only want one set of china that works for both every day and entertaining.

        We always had “everyday” dishes and “special” dishes growing up, so I’d either keep your old set as the “everyday” dishes or get something cheap and indestructible in addition to fine china. Corelle isn’t the prettiest, but I agree with everyone below the basic white is inoffensive and this stuff withstands everything – even being hit by a hammer! http://www.corelle.com/patterns/winter-frost-white

    • Amelia Pond

      I would not get a formal set of china to use everyday with kids. I know my mom cried when my little sister accidently dropped a bowl one Christmas (it was my mom’s great-grandmother’s set). I would hate feeling that bad or being that nervous daily. And I would feel that bad if I had just spend 1200! That being said there are nicer mid-range everyday sets. I got the Pearl collect set from JC Pennys and it is actually very nice. It comes automatically with 12 place settings and I want to say it was around $100.
      But if this is just for formal/special occasions, I think it is worth a splurge. It does make things feel more special when you have the “good plates” out.

    • Walnut

      I cringe at the prices of nice dinnerware. I’m a Fiestaware fan personally and have started picking up the pieces when I see them on sale and I’ve been gifted some pieces for Christmas.

      Is the variety you want one than can be picked up over time or do you risk the set being discontinued? If you can wait, I would build the collection over time and with coupons or discount codes if they are available. Keep 4 of the crappy plates/bowls around for the kids to use.

    • Anon in PNW

      I would totally shop antique stores for a set of fine china. I see complete china sets for 8 or 12 or even more for 200-400 dollars depending on the brand, etc.

      • Senior Attorney

        I got (one of my sets of) my fine china at a n antique mall. Something like $600 for service for 12, and the place settings are 7 pieces each including two different kinds of soup bowls, plus there were also multiple serving pieces. It’s gorgeous and I love it!

    • Eleanor

      Antique stores! Of the antique-mall variety, not the really fancy and expensive variety. I am always amazed at the amount of china, including complete or mostly complete sets I see in antique stores or used furniture stores, at quite cheap prices. The only drawback here is that you likely couldn’t find replacements if you broke a dish.

    • rosie

      I would not want to have fine china for everyday use, but I do think it’s worth getting a set of “everyday” china or stoneware that you like. You will have it for a long time and use it all the time (assuming you don’t eat at restaurants every meal). If you’re looking for deals, check out outlets (Lenox, etc.). I sometimes see dish sets on Ideeli, too. Macy’s often has amazing deals on housewares, you just have to check–I purchased two fine china place settings as a wedding gift for $150 total (normally $180 each–buy one, get one free plus a coupon code).

    • Darby

      Oh I love dishes. So I have tons & tons & take an “accessories” approach to them. I don’t focus on full sets, rather I buy pieces (dinner plates, soup bowls, etc.) as separates. I get commercial brands at outlets (Crate & Barrel, Mikasa, etc.), pick up sets on sale at Anthro & Jonathan Adler & also buy a ton at garage sales & flea markets. I use dishware to create different moods/kinds of parties & I like an eclectic look. This might not work for you if you want it once & done, but I love having a lot of different options.

      • NOLA

        One of the good things about taking a “separates” approach is that if you buy a solid color, you can fill in other pieces that go with the set without matching. My dishes are cobalt blue and I have pottery pieces that go with it and white platters with blue rims and white plates with cobalt fleur de lis. It’s more fun that way!

        • Anastasia

          I love this idea.

          We didn’t register for china for our wedding, and frankly don’t have space for it at the moment in our starter apartment. But when we move into a house with room for a china cabinet (oh, I love china cabinets! My grandmothers have beautiful ones, and my mom, too), I might steal this approach. So many brands and eras have kept coming back to cobalt and white, I bet your eclectic set is awesome!

          On a more general note, my mom started using her good china set for every day at one point when siblings and I were all old enough to be careful. It had metal rims and was dishwasher safe, as long as we used the delicate cycle and no heated drying. The *people* in the house never broke a dish, but our dog liked to lick the dirty dishes when the dishwasher was open….and one day she got startled mid-lick and somehow pulled out the whole lower drawer when she jumped. We lost a few place settings, and that’s one of the only times I’ve actually seen my mom upset about “things.” :(

    • Leone

      This is as cheap as it gets but I LOVE our Corelle. We have everything in just the super plain white. Lots of different-sized bowls, plates, mugs, etc. I spend my housewares money on nice napkins and fresh flowers for the table. The white plates look great with everything and hold up well.

      I’m also a big believer in kids using “real” dishware, not plastic plates. So while I’m teaching my kiddos not to throw their plates off the table (!) I don’t have to cringe every time they threaten it, because Corelle is so easy to replace. And it’s so simple it doesn’t look out of place when I’m hosting a nice dinner party for adults.

      • Honey Pillows

        I’m still trying to convince my boyfriend to move from plastic plates to Corelle. He’s still convinced they’re too expensive and not microwave safe. *sigh*

        • No Problem

          What?? First of all, how much do you spend on plastic plates? (I’m assuming you’re talking about disposable ones) Add up that cost over a year or two and compare to the cost of a set of Corelle dishes. Second, I’ve been using my mom’s set of Corelle dishes that she got in her 20s (so early 1970s) for years. We used them as a family until I was at least 10 before graduating to Fiestaware or something similar. Then they sat in a box in the basement until I took them to college. This is all to say that they are extremely durable and will last forever, and are absolutely microwave safe. Your boyfriend needs a reality check.

        • Elysian

          Definitely microwave safe. Also, oven safe – “Plates and bowls can warm contents in conventional ovens up to 350 degrees F.” It’s basically just fancy glass. And you can get service for 4 people for like, $30 – dinner plates, lunch plates, bowls, and mugs. I am very confused by his arguments.

        • MelD

          I just got a4 place setting set of Corelle for $7.50 at Target. My guess is that he spends more than that in a month on plastic plates!

        • M-C

          Eeeuw! Beside esthetic and financial arguments, plastic plates when microwaved release really nasty stuff in your food. If I were you, I’d buy a set of Corelle and just use if for myself if necessary.
          Is this just laziness about dishes? Get a dishwasher.

      • Bonnie

        Another Corelle lover here. We’ve had the same set for about a decade. They’re durable and definitely microwave set. Ours is basic white so I can accessorize with different linens. We do have a set of nice dishes but rarely use them because it’s a pain to have to hand wash them.

      • CJ

        I just passive-aggresively packed up my roommate’s stoneware while she was on vacation and replaced it with Corelle. Maybe not “un”breakable, but very break resistant, shiny, grown up, thin like china, strong like plastic, easily replaceable, lots of patterns, cheap. I can’t say how glad I am to get rid of thick, heavy, breakable, stoneware.

        I grew up with it and my mom’s set has lasted through the microwave, dishwasher, end thousands of meals.

    • Anon for this

      I am a klutz AND have children. We got restaurant-grade chine from a restaurant supply store. It’s more expensive than BBB stuff, but no where near as expensive as what you’re quoting. I have ruined many a dish set, but these still look brand new after ~5 years. Plus, they make our food look fancy ;) We have Homer-Loughlin, which is made in the USA, too!

    • Elysian

      We have Corelle, which probably falls under “the kind of stuff you get for college” but I still love it. It’s not expensive, its hard to break, and its light and thin (great for storing lots and lots of stuff). It’s also the type of dishware that I grew up with. You can get it at Target, Amazon, their website, BBB… The only caveat is that they change designs sometimes and its hard to get replacement pieces. But its so inexpensive that I don’t mind getting another set if I lose enough pieces.

      My college dishware actually WAS Fiestaware, which most people have recommend. Then and now, I think its too heavy for my pitifully weak arms. I don’t have kids, but the couple Fiesta pieces I still have are broken and chipped because I’m a klutz and my dishwasher kills things. My Corelle is holding up a lot better.

      • ELS

        Huh. I don’t have Corelle, so maybe I’m lacking comparison here, but I got Fiesta dishes as my first grown up dishes with my husband, and I haven’t had any problems with chipping/breaking, etc. Of course, I agree that it’s heavy, but that’s part of what I love about it – it’s substantial. Of course, the main motivator was being able to collect a bunch of crazy colors. :)

        But, after several ringing endorsements of Corelle, I may have to give a set a try. I’ve been looking for another set of all-white dishes, and I’m a big fan of inexpensive + durable.

        • LadyEnginerd

          Corelle is designed to be stronger than stoneware. Like throw it on the floor and it bounces kind of strong. It was developed by the same company behind both pyrex and gorilla glass and is in its own way an engineering marvel. It’s super lightweight (which can lead to it feeling informal) but it really resists chipping.

          • Senior Attorney

            God help you if it lands wrong, though. When it breaks it doesn’t just break, it shatters into a million billion tiny sharp shards and splinters!

          • KK

            This is so true. It’s odd. I have dropped several of our Corelle pieces and they just bounce, but one time I dropped a bowl and it straight shattered. Weird. But it is generally very durable and cheap enough that I don’t really care if one shatters. Great everyday dishes.

            I’ve always thought that when we have more money, I’ll get nicer dishes. For now, I’m fine with just the corelle.

      • Bonnie

        Most outlet malls have Corelle stores that sell replacement and filler pieces.

    • SH

      I have the Noritake dinnerware set. I got it when I moved into my law school apartment, and 4 years later it still looks new and shiny. It’s nice quality, and I’ve stuck it in the oven under the broiler for a few minutes and no one died from eating off the plate, so I’d say it’s pretty decent. I have a set of four and a bunch of the serving ware, and I don’t think I spent $1500 for all of it.

    • Marilla

      I have nice formal china which we use every week (Friday night dinners, whether we have guests or it’s just me and my husband). We registered for it and returned the majority of the stuff we got for credit, because the china was the most important for us out of all our registry stuff. I can honestly say it’s my favourite household item and it was 100% worth it. We also got 12 settings because of big families/lots of guests and had to buy bowls separately.

      The most important thing, I would say, is to keep an eye out for sales. We got all of our pieces between 40-50% off – without that discount I would never have allowed myself to buy the pattern I loved. It helps to have a trusty sales associate who will call you when there’s a good sale. I think this is true whether you want fancy china or more in-between stuff. (If you are in Canada – check the Bay for great frequent sales.)

      I know that most people don’t use good china regularly, so if it’s just for once a year, yes, look for something in between the Walmart boxed sets and Wedgwood bone china that you can use daily and dress up for occasions (with things like cheap charger plates or coloured napkins.. lots of ideas online). It’s not worth the storage space or the money if you only bring it out occasionally. (And I definitely would not use our china daily – it would take away from how special it is.)

        • Marilla

          I seriously love my china. You’re definitely right that it sets a mood, and it inspires me to step it up with flowers/candles etc. Plus it makes my food look so much classier than during the week :)

    • elz

      After being married for 11 years, we just bought new “everyday” dishes since that is what we see on a daily basis. I was sick and tired of the ones we got after our wedding. I stared at those flowers too many times, I guess! We have used our china maybe 3 or 4 times in 11 years. Our entire set was my in-laws first set of china. This is primarily the reason I hate that set of china-Ha! Anyhow, we purchased the Williams-Sonoma white dishes with a red ring detail. I already has all white serveware, so everything coordinates and can be used for any occassion. I highly recommend all white, or almost white dishes, they are really versatile for entertaining.

    • Honey Pillows

      I’m going to be the lone dissenting voice here and say that if you want china, get it.

      Don’t get it just because you feel like you should -Crate and Barrel has plenty of nice dishes that will last longer than college plates but won’t break the bank. However, if you love having family dinners, throw dinner parties, or have a reason to celebrate semi-formal dinners regularly, setting a table with beautiful china sets a mood you can’t replicate on Fiestaware. My mother has a set of Fruit of Life Lenox she absolutely adores, and she uses it every Friday, and hosts big family dinners or religious dinners multiple times a year.

      You should keep a set of ordinary dishes for every day cereal and microwaved leftovers, but if you love it, you can afford it, you can see yourself using it, and you have space, then sure.

      • TurtleWexler

        Yep. We have an everyday set of white dishware from Crate and Barrel, and it’s really nice and durable. But we also have some gorgeous Lenox china that we rarely use, and now that we’re settled in a house, I definitely plan to pull it out for “dinner dates” at home, whenever we have company, and on basically any other excuse I can find. We purposely chose a china pattern that has been around for awhile and will also coordinate well with other patterns if it’s ever discontinued. I love it and don’t want it to languish in boxes!

    • Jennifer

      I don’t find this a boring topic at all! We have the Classic Century Dinnerware by Eva Zeisel for Crate and Barrel. It’s moderately priced and has been continuously available since at least 2005. I have found it to be sturdy for everyday use (I have two very young children) but distinctive/pretty enough to set out for company. I think the key is to find something to your liking and use it without a second thought. Even if it’s fancy china.

    • AIMS

      I wouldn’t spend $1500 on my china, personally, esp. if we’re talking everyday dishes that kids or dish washing may break. But I would absolutely get new nice dishes! I just don’t think it has to be a $1500 proposition. I went to a Williams Sonoma outlet and bought their Brasserie banded porcelain dinnerware — dinner and salad plates –for I think around $150, maybe even a bit less (WS Outlet is the sh*t because it’s all the same store stuff but for much less). They had bowls, but I wanted something different so I bought coordinating bowls in a more colorful pattern (2 sets of 4 @ $29/ea). The dishes are great quality for everyday use and coordinate really well with other stuff if you want to change it up.

      I would recommend doing something similar. They don’t always have such amazing prices (I got lucky), but they have big sales very frequently so if you have one near you, stop by and talk to the salespeople – you can catch a fantastic deal!

      You can also look for big home sales from places like Bloomingdales’ (they usually have a huge one come Labor Day) or check out Homegoods, which often has really great British china (I tend to avoid China china).

      Anyway, it might take a bit more effort but you can get really fantastic dinnerware at so many places for I’d say well under $500, and probably around $300. And that I would definitely do!

      • MissJackson

        AIMS, we’re dishes twins! I also have the WS Brasserie banded porcelain dinnerware. We’ve had ours for several years and (knock on wood) have not broken a single piece yet. I paid retail, but it was still infinitely less expensive than fine china. I have the blue/white, and since that’s a traditional dishware pairing, it’s been easy to pick up coordinating pieces, too (I have some really fun dessert plates)!

        My husband and I are just not “fine china” people — we could not envision ourselves using it enough to be worth the price. Also my mother in law has roughly 12 (not an exaggeration) full sets of china, so we figure at some point in the future we will likely inherit a set or two should we so desire. However, if you are someone who would love and use fine china, I certainly do not think that you should deprive yourself.

        • AIMS

          Haha-I have the white & red! I agree – they’re great! It’s easy to mix them with other patterns, too, so whenever I see cute bowls or salad plates on sale at Anthropologie, I don’t feel bad picking up a couple to mix into our rotation.

          I think it’s nice that your MIL has so many sets, though. I’m very sentimental about stuff like that so the idea of family china passed down the generations really appeals to me. My grandmother had some beautiful china and I really cherish the few pieces of it that came my way (and it’s a nice way to feel like she is still in my life in this small way).

    • Adele

      What kind of dishes are you buying that cost $1500 for 12 dinner plates, salad plates, and soup bowls? Is this “fine china” we’re talking? I would not recommend that for daily use — the wear and tear will wreck it, never mind the kids. If you notice, even nice restaurants don’t use that kind of plates for actual service.
      Plus, most of even the nicest dishes go on sale all the time!! Never pay retail! You can get a great Villeroy & Boch set of dishes, cups, saucers, serving bowls and platters, included, for about $800 for 12 right now at Bloomie’s, and it’s not even at a particularly good sale and includes a ton of stuff you don’t need. I think there’s a lot of room between old BBB dishes and a $1500 set of china! ;-)

    • lawsuited

      We compromised and got reasonably nice stoneware from Pottery Barn. We saved some money by getting 12 dinner plates for when we entertain, but fewer side plates, soup bowls and cereal bowls.

      I desperately want a full set of Kate Spade china (and I do mean desperately. I dream about it) as my “special occasion” dishes which will put me back at least $1500. I’m thinking about asking for place settings as Christmas gifts this year so it’ll be more affordable for me to buy the additional place settings to make a full set. You could consider slowly collecting place settings of nicer china over time?

      Also, you could mix nicer dishes with less expensive ones to make a full set. A friend bought very nice but very expensive bowls that she loved from a boutique and then mixed them with dinner plates and side plates from IKEA.

      • Marilla

        The Kate Spade china patterns are gorgeous. I all-Ellen-caps LOVED the Gardner Street collection. (My husband did not, otherwise I wouldn’t have been able to pick between that one and the set I chose in the end.)

        (And now I’m going to be the crazy china pattern lady on this site forever…

        • Boring Decision to Make

          The Gardner Street (green) is actually the collection I am dying to own. I appreciate everyone’s comments, although the truth is I don’t love monochrome dishes and I hate heavy dishes, plus we want small bowls (that can stand on their side in the dishwasher)…I think we may stick with what we have for now, since I am not so excited by the alternatives. Thanks, all!

          • Anne Shirley

            Buy it! That pattern is gorgeous, and it sounds like you can afford it.

          • KLG

            I registered for Kate Spade china for my wedding (not the gardner pattern). I couldn’t help it :) I’m embarrassed to admit it but I know I was willing to buy whatever we didn’t get gifted to make 8 place settings. I grew up with my mom using the nice china as often as she could for dinners with my grandparents and when we were 10+, for our birthday dinners, even if the birthday meal was spaghetti. :) I know it seems like a lot of money but if it is affordable on your salary and will make you happy every time you use it, definitely go for it! Even though I think my mom’s china is ugly, I LOVED eating on it and think of all those happy memories with family every time I use my own china set.

        • SAB

          I have 4 sets of china. Everyday, informal, formal, and Christmas. Trust me. It gets crazier.

          • gov anon

            I <3 you SAB. At the moment I only have 2 sets. Everday, my "good" dishes (Franciscan's Desert Rose pattern–they were my Grandmother's everyday dishes), and I desperately want a set of Christmas china. But Mr. gov anon doesn't see the need.

          • PT Lawyer

            I’m with you – I have ….

            – Mottahedeh Blue Lace (12 settings, wedding china)
            – some Mottahedeh Merian dessert plates
            – 40+ plain white plates with gold trim (mostly Rosenthal) for parties
            – my grandmother’s pewter (yes, metal) dishware for by the pool
            AND
            – 10 year old Martha Stewart for KMart set for everyday, plus 4 melamine plates for the toddlers.

            Plus some other odds and ends. I love my china and NO ONE uses paper plates in my house.

      • Anonymous

        I have the kate spade black and white china set (forgot the name) we got for our wedding. The dinner plates and side plates that we use all the time are simple and the dessert stuff has a cool grphic flower print. Do I use it all the time? No. Do I love them? YES.

    • karenpadi

      For everyday dishes, I have a set of plain white bone China at macys for about $150.
      I love it!

    • anon

      I bought a couple of 8 place setting sets of Mikasa Italian Countryside from Macy’s. They were on sale for $150 for a 45 piece set at the time, so I got 2, total of 16 place settings. It’s not fine china, but I like it, and it doesn’t bother me if someone breaks a piece.

    • In the Pink

      Got some daily stonewear, Mikasa – Sedona style, from BBB website…good for being sturdy and nice enough that you could put it out for company use.

      FWIW, for the past 27 years of our marriage, we had 3 sets of dishes. Mother’s age Rosenthal (which is in a storage buffet by the DR table and never used). Our wedding choice was a Mikasa (Travertine Grey) which we loved, but shortly grew to hate because the gold rims prevented microwave use. Relied upon my set of white Corelle for every day and expanded the set over the years. Just got rid of the Corelle and the Mikasa fancy as we renovated the kitchen and lost storage.

      Since we don’t entertain and family lives elsewhere, we have the fine Rosenthal (because I have to keep it and adore it and bought Fostoria antique stemware to match it) and the everyday Mikasa Sedona. That’s it.

      YMMV.

      Took a while to find the Sedona and agree upon it. I was rooting for a white, asian shaped set of anything, as it goes with everything, but D won out. He’s color blind, so blue is the color for him.

      Had taken a poll of colleagues and long time friends and the consensus was white. I don’t live with them :)

    • Kellyn

      I love the plain white dinnerware from Crate and Barrel. Inexpensive, tons of pieces available, easy to replace. Simple.

      I do have formal china but it’s not everyday stuff. It can’t be dishwashered so it’s not coming out unless it’s a nicer occasion.

    • mamabear

      I have two sets of china. One set is the one my mom painstakingly collected for me piece by piece using stamps at the grocery store when I was a baby. Though the label says “fine china, Japan” I doubt it’s anyone’s idea of truly fine china. However, i wouldnt trade it for the world. Over the years, I have found some pieces to add to it on ebay. I can serve 8 now. I doubt I will ever be able to serve 12. I use it at Thanksgiving, birthdays and Easter. Probably wouldnt use it for a big dinner party anyway because I know how my friends are when we’re all together with wine flowing. :)

      The second set was started for me by my sister as a Christmas gift. It’s the traditional Spode Christmas tree pattern. She was going to buy me a piece a year as a christmas gift (we never know what to get each other) and then forgot after a couple of years. So i found an 8 piece set at an estate sale and filled out my collection. I think this set is somewhat collectible because it is all made in england, whereas newer spode is made in china.

      We use the spode a lot. I actually switch out my everyday dishes for the spode the day after Thanksgiving and switch back on new years day. The switch gives me a chance to go through all of my dishes once a year and replace chipped pieces. My kids really look forward to eating on the Christmas plates for all of December.

      My everyday is a discontinued Johnson Bros England pattern in plain white. I love it. I’ve had it longer than I’ve had my husband. I dont like chips, can live with a little crazing but not a lot, so I replace individual pieces via replacements dot com. It was a very popular pattern in. england for years so no shortage of pieces on the market, though I expect they’ll increase over time. It’s good to have an everyday set with all of the matching platters and so forth – makes every meal feel more special and it’s good enough for when company comes over.

      So – clearly, i am INTO dishes. My opinion? If you think you’d like a beautiful set of china and can afford it, go for it! It’s a lovely old tradition and you can hand it down to your children.

    • Working Girl

      We got a full set from Villeroy for our wedding and it is totally worth it in my opinion. We use it whenever we have dinner parties or want to cook something special for each other. It looks beautiful and I love seeing my table well set. I would say it comes out once a month or every two months, no more, but it will last us our lifetime. It stays far away from the kids!

    • gov anon

      What about something like Fiestaware? Still nice but not quite as pricey as fine china. Also, very mix and matchabl! Even if they discontinue one color, you’ll still be able to get coordinating colors and everything will still look good together.

      I wish we’d gone the Fiestaware route last time we bought dishes. We did buy a nice set of Pfaltzgraf dishes last time, and of course the pattern we picked was promptly discontinued. It is such a pain to replace broken pieces.

    • Anonymouse

      Yes. I think most of us glance at the clothes, declare them unaffordable/unsuitable, and move on to more interesting topics. :)

        • SF Bay Associate

          Not at all. We have lots of law students and r-e-t-t-es either starting out in their careers or in less well-paid positions, and the temporarily unemployed living on a shoestring along with the executives, judges, law firm partners, and other powerful positions. One of the things I love about this blog is that there are women like me, and women very not like me, whether it’s much more wealthy or much less wealthy, much more experienced or much less, much more liberal or much more conservative, etc. The diversity of smart, thoughtful women supporting each other is what brings me back again and again.

          My family eats off Corelle, too, Molly :).

          • Anonymous

            I think mine is Corelle. It was my aunt’s. As it starts breaking I’m thinking I may get a set of all-white dishes….

          • Leone

            haha I just posted above about how much I love Corelle. Could maybe afford other dishware if I wanted to/planned for it but I don’t want to! Nothing wrong with Corelle.

        • Honey Pillows

          There’s a lot of variance. And there’s a surprising number of unemployed/underemployeds on here as well (like this gal…)

        • Ashley

          I’m in marketing, and I think there’s a couple other ladies in marketing, so you’re not alone :) Also, I wear cheaper clothes than what’s shown most of the time. Today’s outfit features the ultra high-end Target and JC Penney! However, agreeing with SF Bay Associate on the variety of perspectives here, and chiming in to say it’s a great community.

      • Walnut

        I’m an accountant and I eat off a variety of dinnerware. Including Chinet when I’m just not feeling up to dishes.

        • Anne Shirley

          Wouldn’t one of the key rules of content marketing and social media be to get to know what goes on in a forum before starting to post there? Just a thought.

          • K...in transition

            gross! How about “welcome to the hive, Molly!” or answering the question… I know we’re all protective of our home here but let’s not kick new kids out of the sandbox… as long as she doesn’t throw rocks or smash our castles, she’s welcome to play with us :)

            Welcome, Molly!

    • AG

      Yes, it’s a site for narcissits to talk about their insipid problems. Welcome to the hive, indeed.

      • anon

        No, you rude person, the narcissits can sit in the corner and be insipid all by themselves until they learn how to spell.

  6. Partner trouble

    Threadjack to prevent myself from screaming in my office

    I work in a small firm. Four partners and a couple of associates. I was hired by on partner, and do work for that partner and another partner. The other two don’t really have enough work for me. I have been here about a year.

    I love my job most of the time. Low billing requirement, decent pay, super lax schedule and dress code. From the beginning I had issues with the partner that hired me. He has superiority issues and about once a month I can expect a degrading email about my work product that is simply untrue. He also has a habit of sending me borderline abusive text messages to my personal number over the weekend. If it were just this, I could probably deal. However, his work product is pretty terrible and I end up cleaning up a lot of it after the client has seen it. I really don’t respect the man, and I just got another one of his angry emails that is completely misplaced, and I am fuming!

    I really enjoy working with the other partner, and he is aware that of the situation and agrees that it is totally inappropriate. I know I need to suck it up, but sometimes it pains me to introduce myself as being from this firm because of this problem partner. Meanwhile, the “nice” partner is the best attorney I have worked for, and an amazing teacher. I have been told that “the issue will be resolved” but I know that likely nothing will change.

    Posting from my phone for anonymity purposes, so please excuse typos!

    • AnonInfinity

      This sounds really cr*ppy. I have no advice, but I’m sending good luck vibes your way that it actually get resolved or that you’re able to find the intestinal fortitude to deal with it. If it were me, I’d consider looking for another job.

      • Partner trouble

        Thanks! Its definitely a too good to leave, too bad to stay situation. Having been in much worse circumstances, I’m afraid of landing in a truly terrible position. I’ve been here about a year, so maybe its time to start at least kind of looking.

      • emcsquared

        I’ve been in a similarly abusive situation – unless the good partner is willing to step in and say that he’ll supervise all your work for bad partner, I would start looking for a new job ASAP.

        Have you dug underneath the situation? What politics would convince the other partners to stay at a firm with bad partner? Is bad partner a big rain maker who keeps the other partners afloat? If so, I would tread carefully and be very quiet about my job search.

        • Partner trouble

          Good partner is doing what he can, but he can’t supervise all my work. Office politics are a while other issue. As far as I can tell, bad partner is a bad apple, and the others aren’t thrilled about having him around. He may be a bit of a liability but it hasn’t risen to the point of the others making major changes. One major partner left recently and this guy hoarded the work, and then did a terrible job with it. He may think he’s the rain maker, but really its the good partner who has the great reputation.

          If he would just leave me alone and let me do my job it might not be so bad, but I really hate being a punching bag.

          • Anon for this

            I had literally this situation happen to me recently.

            After about a year, I’m leaving. I couldn’t handle the abuse for the salary.

            If your firm is anything like mine, nothing will change. Please look out for yourself.

    • Herbie

      Read The No A$$hole Rule regarding tips for surviving a Den of A$$sholes. And start looking for a new job. Lax schedule and laid back dress code aren’t worth putting up with a Grade A A$$hole.

      • Partner trouble

        Its more than that. Financially its a great deal, I have tons of autonomy, and they have been fantastic about letting me build my own client base, and I’ve thought this might be a great opportunity to start working towards my own practice. I’ve been able to significantly limit my interactions with bad partner, but its time to decide how much is too much.

        • M-C

          Building your own client base sounds like the key here. And if you’ve been able to limit interactions with Bad Partner, then life’s improving. Keep up both of these things, as they’re crucial to you.

          Alas, the nicer Good Partner is, the less likely it is that he’s actually deal with BP. You may want to wait a bit, till he’s convinced that you’d be a really painful person to lose, and then start educating him with anti-bullying materials (snakes in suits?). Eventually you’ll want to make the argument to him that allowing bullies to fester at work is a bad business move. But then you’ll be ready to move on, with your client base, if necessary. How about giving yourself a deadline, like a date (another year?) or a certain number of clients?

          Meanwhile, how about gathering solid documentation about BP’s misdeeds? Keep evidence of his professional failings as you go, as well as of his personal abuse (with more doc of how you actually did things right). It’ll keep you from blowing up so much (“aaah! a good one for the file!”) as well as being extremely helpful should there ever be a showdown.

    • Partner trouble

      Thanks for your sympathetic ears! Wow, I was all over this one. Clearly avoiding work! I’m going to keep an ear about about other opportunities and continue to document all the craziness.

  7. To 'Burned Out Baby Lawyer'

    Burned Out, if you happen to see this — I’ve been in your exact position before and stuck it out way longer than I should’ve because I was so afraid of being perceived as a quitter or ineffective. I ended up regretting that choice, big time. The toll it took on my mental and physical well-being was not worth it, at all. After I quit, I came down with a nasty case of mono that lasted months, not weeks. My doctor said once my body finally had a chance to relax — after several years of being ‘on,’ I had no reserves to fight off anything because my immune system was basically shot. (OK, that’s a highly unscientific explanation, but I think you get my point.)

    Definitely seek out EAP. It helped me cope with the day-to-day grind until I could get the heck out of there. And I second the recommendations to quit while you’re ahead, while you still have your good health and self-esteem.

    I think it’s really common for hard-working women to not know how to get ourselves OUT of a sh*tty work situation, particularly when they’re young. Interestingly, I struggled with the “should I stay or should I go?” question when I was in my mid-twenties and am watching my 26-year-old sister go through a very similar situation right now. It’s rough. Just wanted to reassure you that you’re not alone, and there isn’t anything wrong with you. Breaking up with a job is one of those life skills that most of us have to learn the hard way, unfortunately.

  8. FP Angie

    I never squee, but will just this once… I get to attend my *first* non-wedding black tie event in the Fall. SQUEEEE!!!! And I am so using all of you to help me find an appropriate outfit because you all have great taste!

  10. Anon for this

    Oh my gosh, I just sat in a meeting where a young woman was wearing a knit, strapless column dress over her bra. Even if somehow she thought that a body-length tube top is workplace appropriate, I would have expected that the visible white bra straps would have made her rethink. LOL, although maybe she thought strapless+straps = okay?

    • layered bob

      eergh I see this all. the. time. And women wearing backless dresses or dresses with a very low-cut or open back with regular bras. Just ’cause it’s a dirty “flesh” colored bra doesn’t mean we can’t see it!

      • qwerty

        i hate exposed lingerie, but carrie bradshaw totally thought it was a thing. it always makes me cringe when i watch old SATC episodes.

        • DC Jenny

          I think we can all agree that pretty much any Carrie Bradshaw Thing is never work appropriate. (Unless you are a freelance writer, then, hey, knock yourself out with the giant flower pins and the tutus and the exposed lingerie.)

        • Niktaw

          Second the exposed lingerie hate. Adult woman + racerback top + regular bra = no.

    • You might be a redneck

      Wow — This is on a Jeff Foxworthy CD of mine from the 90s: you are wearing a dress that’s strapless and a bra that isn’t. Bonus points for her for the full-length tube top and for being (presumably) doing this sober and during the day and at work.

      • Adele

        Lol! My personal pet theory is that these ladies arrange the dress just so in front of their mirror and think it passes as “straps” when they stand still, totally not thinking that the tube top will inevitably be sliding around as they walk and move!

        • K...in transition

          Somewhere around here I have a Jeff Foxworthy cassette… autographed!

    • aft

      I initially read “strapless” as “sleeveless,” which made me read the rest of that sentence as you horrified that she was wearing *more* than just a bra. Reading comprehension fail, but entertaining trying to guess your workplace before I figured it out ;)

    • Herbie

      It took me a minute to understand what you were talking about because I literally could not wrap my mind around the concept of strapless top over bra with straps. Hrm.

    • anon

      I see things like that on television shows, I don’t really get that look. It should definitely not be a “thing.”

  11. MelD

    I was too late to this morning’s Target review thread, and I have to say I was disappointed in the ponte knit skirt. I tried on two sizes and there was something off about the seaming that made it hang weird- for some reason the seams seemed to hang higher than the rest of the skirt. I did try the lined cotton skirt that comes in many colors and that one was not bad at all. It seemed to hang better and have a slightly better shape for those of use that are slightly curvier.

    • M-C

      Drive-by diagnosis: badly adjusted serger. Unfixable.
      However the same skirt made by another stitcher would be totally perfect. So maybe keep looking, if you’re motivated to?

    • Laura

      Mine are going back today for the same reason. Yuck. I have 2 from the spring set and love them. These look like barf.

  13. Christina Aguilera's Spray Tan

    Easy question – nail polish to interview at fortune 100 company in midwest. Communications department, director level. Yes or no? Short nails, dark red color. It looks less goth than it sounds, but then again, I don’t always trust my judgement.

    Also: Skirt suit and pannyhose – I yes to both?

    • Jill

      You will be fine if you do exactly as you suggest.

      You didn’t ask, but PUH-LEEZE , do NOT wear a Fanny-Pak to the interview!!

    • AnonInfinity

      No to the red nails, in my opinion. Yes to the skirt and hose unless you have a pant suit that make you feel more confident and is interview worthy.

    • lawsuited

      Be safe and go with neutral nails for the interview. Once you’re hired, go ahead and rock the jewel tones!

    • Merabella

      I feel like red is a classic nail color and not that extreme. But that is coming from a lady who rocked red nails to her interview and got the job, so YMMV.

  15. cbackson

    I actually really like this suit, but in my transactional-law office, the lady lawyers never wear suits.

  16. 2lawl

    Question (Quick search revealed lots of other questions on this topic, but no solutions!):

    How in the world do you keep your toes from being crushed when wearing stockings!? My Cole Haans fit me perfectly barefoot. With stockings, my feet slide forward just enough to squish my big toes thoroughly. I have a 2 hour meet-and-greet tomorrow at a very conservative firm that I will be interviewing at. I want to do that traditional skirt-suit-stockings-pumps getup.. but my feet will destroy me in a manner of minutes when standing up.

    I tried inserts today.. they don’t help. Hairspray? Cut out the bottom of the feet? I am at a loss. Help?

  17. another rette

    Had an epiphany. None of my 72 pairs of ballet flats fit me at all. I’m done. Just ordered a pair of slightly more homely but infinitely more comfortable Naturalizers. Why not make your commute as comfortable as possible?

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