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Suit of the Week: Halogen

Patterned Suit: HalogenFor busy working women, the suit is often the easiest outfit to throw on in the morning. In general, this feature is not about interview suits for women, which should be as classic and basic as you get — instead, this feature is about the slightly different suit that is fashionable, yet professional. I like this suit for a lot of reasons — it's hard to go wrong with a small print in black/white, it comes in regular, plus, and petite separates sizes, ensuring something for everyone, and the open, collarless jacket with pencil skirt is a sleek look for summer. But for whatever reason, when I first saw this on Nordstrom's site, it was right next to this Smythe jacket, and considering the price difference for two very similar pieces, I like it even more. The jacket (Halogen Zip Pocket Open Jacket) is $98 ($108 for plus sizes), and the skirt (Halogen Welt Pocket Pencil Skirt) is $59. (L-7)

Sales of note for 12.2.24 (Happy Cyber Monday!! See our full sale listing here!)

And some of our latest threadjacks here at Corporette (reader questions and commentary) — see more here!

Some of our latest threadjacks include:

191 Comments

  1. I also wanted to recommend a seersucker pants suit at BR that I recently bought. It’s very flattering, wears well, doesn’t wrinkle too much, etc. Tons of compliments. And I’m not a pants girl usually, so this is a big deal!

  2. Is a black skirt suit suitable for an interview in the summer in Atlanta? I think navy would be better, but I don’t want to buy a new suit. Would a lighter colored top and nude pumps over black make it look less wintry?

    2. Black skirt or pants are always fine for interview. The only exception I can think of is a very creative (fashion) field.

  3. Experiencing something like golden handcuffs at my work, but more like lifestyle handcuffs.

    My job has extraordinary work/life balance. I work about 9:10-4:50 every day, and usually take a 45min+ lunch break. My boss and coworkers keep a similar schedule (maybe even a little more luxurious!) and everyone works from home once a week.

    Sounds great, but – I don’t enjoy my job. There’s rarely a heavy workload, my boss is incompetent, the whole company is a mess. I’m bored and frustrated, but very rarely stressed. From the outside, it’s a great resume-builder and I get paid well. But I just kind of sit at work rolling my eyes all day and surfing the internet. I never envisioned some kind of “dream career,” I just ended up being successful in a random industry.

    Yeah, a lot of people would love to have my problems. And the idea of going back to working 70 hours a week, as I have done in previous more junior roles at other companies, sounds awful. I have been here a year and am looking at options, but also want to have kids soon and this seems like a great place to be for that.

    This feels like a ridiculous post, but does anyone else have this “problem”? I’m trying to enrich my ample non-work hours. Cooking elaborate meals (my husband gets home 3 hours later than me), gardening, exercise. But I feel like 8 hours of my day and brain are wasted five times a week. For those whose lives are not fulfilled by their careers, how do you enrich your extra time? How do you avoid feeling resentment and boredom every day? I know this is the opposite situation of most posters here, but am curious about others.

    1. When I have had boring but well-paying jobs with resume potential, I have gone through the following evaluation?

      * Is this a temp lull or will my job always be boring? Can I handle this LT?
      * Can I get enough mental stimulation in other parts of my life (adult ed classes, reading a good book during my lunch break, etc.)?
      * Will my skills atrophy?
      * Do outsiders “know” about the boring nature of my job in a way that it’ll hurt me later?

      I personally have done this, but only when, say, I knew I was going to grad school in a year so it didn’t matter. If this were my LT job stretching before me, I might pause more. But see the discussion from Blonde Lawyer a few days ago about the fact that sometimes a job is a job that pays the bills and you don’t always have to be climbing the ladder, if you’ve got a decent thing going and are paid enough. Up to you, really.

    2. If you don’t have that much work and you don’t have pressing deadlines, could you compress your work into your four days in the office and essentially treat your WFH day as a third weekend day? Your workdays might be busier if you’re trying to do a full-time job in four days and you might feel less like your life is being wasted if your down time could be used for fun stuff like reading or baking instead of sitting in front of a computer mindlessly surfing the internet.
      I will say though that although generally your situation sounds like a great gig to me, I’ve found how much you mesh with and respect your boss to be HUGE to work satisfaction and I don’t think it’s unreasonable for you to be really unsatisfied with your current situation if you feel like your boss is incompetent and the company is a mess. Those are pretty big things IMO.

    3. What do you like to do? What are your passions? I’d focus on finding things that really excite you and trying to do those in your free time. Maybe someday you’ll decide you want a career that incorporates your passions in a bigger way, or maybe you’ll accept that you have a boring but well-paid 9-5 and lots of free time to do what makes you happy. I feel like you have to start by asking yourself how you would want to spend your days if you could do anything (and still maintain your current lifestyle).

    4. Stay. Learn a new language. Get involved (lead?) the professional association in your field, develop a specialty relevant to your company’s work. Tons of ways to occupy your time that are stimulating and appropriate for work hours.

      You will be grateful for a boring, low stress job when you have babies/small children and you’ve only slept 4 hours.

      1. +1 to staying. If you’re just about ready to start a family, that’s your motivation right there. Everything that’s bugging you right now will become less important than the flexibility of the job as you get closer and get more excited about your family life changing.

        1. And as you wish (or be grateful) for all of the free time you currently have and the apparent lack of stress.

    5. You mentioned you are thinking of having kids soon, and you’re right that the schedule you’ve described is ideal for that. I know this may sound a little lean-out, but is it too boring to stay there until you’ve had a baby? The schedule you’ve described would be great if you felt a little sickly during your pregnancy, or if you wanted to spend time decorating a nursery, reading up on baby products, etc., and it would be great when you return to work while still navigating a newborn. You could keep looking for something else– and even transition to a new job after parental leave instead of returning to your current one. If kids are still more than a year away for you, maybe don’t wait around. And you can absolutely have a baby if you switch to a more demanding schedule. But as someone with an infant, I think you might value your flexibility a lot more in that situation.

      1. I totally agree with this. I often agree when people say “don’t leave before you leave” but it seems, honestly, quite crazy to leave a job like this when you want to have a baby really soon. This seems like a perfect gig for the pregnancy/newborn years.

        1. +1,000,000.

          Something I didn’t realize when I had a baby was how often they get sick. A job like that would have been a godsend the first year of my daughter’s life. I had been back from maternity leave four days when I had to go get my child from daycare for the first time because she was running a fever. I started crying in my pediatricians office when he told me that during the first year in daycare they typically catch something new every 7-10 DAYS. Then, the next year its half as often, and the next year half as often again. I’ve found this schedule to be brutally close to what I’ve actually experienced. Stay in this job for another couple of years if you really are planning on having a kid soon.

          1. Seriously!? Every 7-10 days? How do parents in Big Law and other Big jobs do this!? It’s unimaginable to me.

          2. I think the question is, how do people without paid leave, enough money to hire a nanny, or dependable family members nearby handle this? A lot of people just get fired when they miss too much work because of sick kids.

          3. Yep. I do this through: trading off days with my husband, in town retired grandparents, working from home, using PTO to cover kid sick days, and working extra hours on nights/weekends. And I still get a lot of snide comments at work, even when I’m getting everything done. No way I could do this with a job that pays hourly or that I couldn’t do remotely.

          4. Exactly! Wow not to make working moms feel bad but my first kid (I quit my job) literally didn’t get sick once his first year. I feel for low income moms whose kids get sick and have to miss work…

          5. Many of them have nannies I think, so illness is less of an issue.

            I handled it by leaning out. I don’t know if public accounting counts as a “big job” though.

          6. Exactly, anon prof. People with “Big jobs” use their big salary to pay for care. There are services exactly for this situation. It is the people without the means to pay for someone to take care of a sick child who can’t go to school or to their state-funded day care (though I also recognize, at least in my state, this is a very limited number of families who actually receive this type of help despite it being one of the key factors to maintaining employment.)

          7. Just throwing it out there- my kid was in daycare from age 3 months – now (3 years). She was not sick (seriously) every 7-10 days EVER. I’d say there were periods where she had a constantly runny nose (nov-March), but she went to daycare. She got a few biggies in the first 2 years- bronchitis, RSV, and a couple nasty ear infections. Those were 3-4 day absences. But I was not missing work weekly or even biweekly.

    6. I am in the same position but with a young child already. Yes, my job sometimes feels like I am under-using my skills, and the atmosphere of non-go-getters can really drive me nuts! So I am with you. I look at job postings all the time, but I know I have a sweet gig for this time in life, especially since we want to have a second child soon. It just depends on how much you can put up with and whether you can find fulfillment in other areas of your life. But trust me, I feel your pain!

    7. I actually am in a very similar situation. Great work/life balance, mostly dysfunctional team with slightly toxic coworkers, disorganized work environment, and an ineffective boss, and while I enjoy the work I do have, there’s just not enough of it to keep me stimulated and engaged all day. My husband and I are TTC and I’m trying to convince myself that this is the perfect job to have while in the first stages of motherhood – and everyone at the firm I left would give their right arm for this job – but it’s hard to fight the side of me that’s a little bored, unchallenged, and intellectually atrophying. Each day feels slow and long, but unstressed, unhurried, etc.

      No real advice here, other than commiseration. I’m trying to think of it as leaning out, just maybe a little too early before I really needed to, but i’m holding on to it for the time coming when i’ll thank my lucky stars I have this job. Hoping that’s the case!

    8. I am you. Have your kid(s) now. You will still care that they day-to-day job sucks, but be very, very glad for the flexibility.

    9. If you are rarely busy and often surfing the internet, could you come up with pet projects? Or take an online class (or evening class) that is kinda work related and do the reading and homework at work? Could you become involved in an industry group or Rotary or similar and do some of that work during work hours?

      If your boss is incompetant and the whole company is a mess, is it a stable position? Is there a risk of losing your job? If there is a risk of the job going up in smoke, it’s probably a good time to start looking casually for another cushy position – since you aren’t desperate, maybe you could find something with similar hours but at a less terrible company/boss. Or is there another division or group you could potentially move to?

      If it’s just “meh, this is boring” I’d work on finding ways to make it less dull with pet projects, or with straight up doing personal things like meal planning and bill paying at work. If it’s “I hate my life because this company is so disfunctional I just spend all day fixing other people’s f-ups” I would say that’s a “get out now” scenario.

      1. Meg makes great points–is it sustainable/stable? Is there a possibility of losing your job.

        I had your job, but I was a 3rd year lawyer, and when facing down any more time with a toxic boss, and given that I was in those years where I was supposed to be building my skills and learning stuff, I felt like I was wasting time, so I got a new job, but you sounds like you’re in a different situation.

    10. This would be a dream job for me because I would attempt to do creative writing during the downtime. Can anyone give an idea what kind of industry this type of unicorn-for-me job might be in?

      1. +1 I run a blog that is successful enough to require 15-20 hours a week of work, but not successful enough to provide me with any real income, and this would be a dream scenario for me too.

        1. Self employed so right there with you! Any downtime for me (like stalking this s*te) is unpaid time.

      2. Be careful with this suggestion, if you’re creating a business on business hours, there could be some conflict. And, depending upon who your employer is, they may actually have rights in that business.

    11. This describes my situation exactly. I feel the same way, have a similar type of job, and everyone else working difficult schedules for less pay drools over my situation. Do I want something more exciting? Yes. But am I really willing to give up the really, really great schedule benefits a year ahead of having a child? Tempting, but no. I just think my future self will thank me, even if my current self is bored mindless.

    12. If you have free time, consider having a baby! A baby will be sure to complete your life!

    13. I left a state agency where about 1/4 of the staff either came in late, had to leave early, or couldn’t come in at all. I got so spoiled with going to the hairdresser and chiropractor for a massage in the middle of the day because I could. Thing is, no one expected anything of me or anyone else and I was not advancing. And the happy hour lunches were insane. Six months ago, I took a small pay cut for a job further from home where I am working way more hours and feel guilty leaving at four for an appointment. I AM SO MUCH HAPPIER!!!! Feeling useful is one of the most important things in life. Don’t underestimate it. The only reason to stay in such a place is if you are caring for young kids or elderly parents.

  4. Hi ladies – I know there’s lots of lawyers on this board. Quick question – I paid up the nose to nab a hotel that is very close to my bar testing s*te (Albany). Is it worth it? I have heard it’s nice to know where you are going to get your lunch and whatnot. Thoughts? I could save about $200 with a hotel that’s driving distance, but then it might be stressful getting there and whatnot. Any advice about this (or any other bar matters) super-appreciated. Thank you!!!

    1. You probably won’t go back to the hotel for lunch but you don’t want to be worried about traffic and parking either. When I took the bar (not in Albany) I stayed in a hotel a 5 minute cab ride away. Maybe there’s a middle ground? Good luck.

      1. I agree. I took the Bar in Albany –ugh — but my Dad made me stay right by the place where we took the bar. It was a good idea, b/c the last thing you need is to save a few bucks and then have your car break down, or have it towed b/c you parked in the wrong place, just to save a few bucks! Dad also made me eat at Jack’s Oyster House where he went with his army buddies years ago. It was Yummy and he paid for EVERYTHING. With food and logging NOT a probelem, I of course PASSED the bar on the FIRST time! YAY!

        I also ate at a good Italian restrunt, but I forgot the name. Does anyone in the HIVE know that restrunt?

        And as a result, I have NOT had to go back to sit for the bar EVER again in Albany – ugh! Sorry to those in the HIVE that live up there, or work there, but it is hardly the place for a city girl like me! DOUBEL FOOEY!

    2. I think it’s worth it, especially depending on what “driving distance” means. If you can save a lot of money by staying a few miles away, it might be worth it, but I wouldn’t want to be more than a 10 minute (at rush hour) drive from the bar exam. Also, if your employed your employer might pay for the hotel – mine did.

    3. Check out air bnb – I know some people who did this and saved a ton over the hotel prices (even more than 200).

    4. I think it’s totally worth it. I took mine in Manhattan and lived in Brooklyn but got a hotel anyway. Being able to walk there and have no stress in the morning (subway for me, parking for you) was worth every penny to me.

    5. Lawyer in Albany here (and I also took the bar in Albany). The answer is – it depends on which bar testing site you are assigned. If you are in the Times Union Center, yes it is worth it (both for traffic and parking reasons). If you are at one of the other locations it is worth less. My assigned location was in Troy and I had to drive, but it wasn’t a big deal (also FYI, if it is Troy – there are ZERO good lunch options in walking distance, at least when I took the bar – bring lunch and leave it in your car).

      If you are driving, make sure you leave plenty of time, traffic at rush hour can randomly get really awful.

      1. I think you can bring a lunch in, no? I did in Albany. If you can’t — be careful of what you’re bringing to eat and leaving out in the hot sunny car all day; it should be ALL packaged goods.

        1. If only there was a small, insulated box and a cold, maybe even frozen substance, you could put inside said box along with your food items to keep them cool until lunch.

      2. We don’t know which site yet, unfortunately…just Albany for now. So I guess there’s a risk that I pay up for the wrong location, now that you mention it. I am an idiot. Ugh.

        1. Anonymous at 3:01 here — If the hotel you are paying for is downtown, I would keep it. The hotels around Albany sell out very quickly for the two days of the bar, and if you get rid of the hotel, there is a risk you will have to stay much farther away. Also, as I said earlier, I think the most stressful parking / driving situation would be if you are assigned to the Times Union, so keep a hotel closer to there. That’s what I did and it ended up working out even though I wasn’t at that location.

          Good Luck on the Bar!

    6. Yes it’s worth it. I took it in Albany and didn’t get the hotel that was right there — don’t remember why, I think it was sold out — and thus I was a 10 min car ride away. So then I had to rent a car and park (bc I did NOT feel comfortable with the taxi situation in that city and didn’t know if there were enough cabs to go around in the morning). So I recall getting to the venue like 90 min early bc I didn’t want to deal with any kind of downtown traffic or parking issues and then just meandering around the venue when I could have been in my hotel room relaxing. So yeah . . . it’s worth it.

    7. I lived about a 30 minute drive away from my bar testing site and I rented a hotel right next door. It was SO nice to just be able to walk over, walk back to the room for lunch (bought a salad and left it in the room fridge), and walk back at the end of the day instead of dealing with rush-hour traffic, parking, etc. It was well worth it to me to avoid all that stress. I was also 7 months pregnant, but would have done the same thing even if not pregnant.

    8. Wrote the bar in Ontario, but for me booking the hotel right next door was absolutely worth it. My first exam there was apparently a major car wreck AND a fire in the subway system. I have no idea if anyone missed their test because of that but it would have destroyed me even if I made it there just under the wire.

      Ask yourself if $200 is worth paying for one less stressful aspect on one of the more stressful days of your life. For me it definitely was.

    9. I took the February bar in Albany a few years back and stayed at a pretty cheap hotel that wasn’t right near the testing site. The hotel had a van taking the bar exam takers to the Empire State Plaza testing site. I made sure I was on the first one that went out so I was sure to be early.

    10. So, this is obviously unlikely, but I had a friend whose car broke down on the way to the LSAT. And because of that I paid for a hotel within walking distance of the bar exam. If there is an accident or anything else that ties up traffic I would not want to deal with the stress. If I did stay a car (or cab) ride away I would be sure to give myself lots of extra time to get there in the morning.

    11. Worth it. I paid out the nose to stay at the hotel where I took the bar, and a few girlfriends and I ordered room service lunch in my room both days. I called to place the order in the morning before going downstairs. It was so nice to not worry about lunch lines and know that we’d make it back in time.

    12. Worth it. I did the same, in the same place, and it was so nice to be able to escape the hordes of stressed out bar takers by retreating to my hotel room for lunch.

    13. I think the advice you’ve already gotten is likely to be correct for you, but I’m not sure it would have been for me, so I’ll offer the other side.

      I took the Bar a 15 minute drive from my apartment and did not get a hotel. For me specifically and personally, the upside to getting to go home, sleep in my own bed, see my husband (who made me dinner), prep a Bar Exam’s worth of healthy lunches in advance (and have all utensils/tupperware/whatever on hand for each day), and just get.the.heck.away from the stress fest that was all other test-takers was key.

      Obviously most of that doesn’t apply to you–it’s different to drive for the sake of staying in your own place than for the sake of saving $200. That said, the last benefit I listed–getting away from other exam takers–was, in retrospect, huge. You know if you’re the kind of person who would benefit from that (in law school, study groups were awful for me–I worried too much about what other people were doing and not enough about what would work for me), but I think it’s worth considering, and if I were in your position, had some reasonable confidence that the more distant hotel would not be full of test-takers, and it wasn’t too far away (30 min might be my max), I’d take the cheaper hotel.

    14. Worth it. You’ve invested so much money/time to get to that point that an extra couple hundred dollars for some piece of mind when you’re *this close* is absolutely worth it.

  5. I’m not generally much of a museum person, but I really enjoy niche museums/museums that specialize in one particular thing. For example, when I lived in DC, I really liked the spy museum (though tix are kind of expensive) because it’s small, manageable in 1.5/2 hours, and specialized.
    What are your favorite niche museums, anywhere in the world? Asking mostly just out of curiosity – unfortunately, I have no upcoming travel planned…

      1. Second. Chihuly is fantastic!

        Also, The Ringling in Sarasota, Florida. The grounds have a traditional art museum, but there’s also a circus museum, gardens, and the Ca’ d’Zan (John Ringling’s mansion)–I believe General Admission includes access to everything.

    2. The weirdest/creepiest museum I’ve ever been to is the Capuchin Crypt in Rome. I swear I’m not a dark or morbid person in general, but found the museum really fascinating. The Capuchin monks had dirt brought back from the holy land. They would bury their dead in the dirt, and once they were decomposed, would dig them up and use their bones for art so they could re-use the dirt for more burials. It’s a series of underground rooms filled with all kinds of bones arranged “artistically”.

      Also, the Ave Maria Grotto in Cullman, AL is really interesting. It is a sculpture garden made by a monk. He made sculptures of famous buildings around the world out of found objects/trash. I call it “Catholic Rock City”.

      1. Yes, I loved the Capuchin Crypt! I know some of the people I was with very uncomfortable thinking that they were looking at dead people, but I thought it was surprisingly profound – and I’m not a religious or spiritual person. Highly recommended.

    3. I like the Computer History Museum in Mountain View and the Tech Museum in San Jose in the bay area. Super nerdy but incredibly informative. I have a STEM undergrad but learned a TON at both these places.
      Everyone loves the Exploratorium in SF but I’ve never really understood the hype. I don’t think it has that much that’s useful to adults, especially compared to the two museums I mentioned above. It seems like much more of a kid place.
      It’s not really a museum in the traditional sense but I’ve gotten a huge kick out of the studio tours I’ve done in LA, especially Warner Brothers. I am a big TV/movie geek and it’s so cool to see props and costumes from some of my favorite movies and shows.
      I really want to go to the spy museum! Definitely on my list for the next trip to DC.

    5. We have been to the Transit Museum in Brooklyn approximately a million times– my SO is a train nerd, but it’s just a really cool museum. We take visitors there frequently; it’s good for all ages. There are old subway train cars that are each restored to a different decade, and the detail is remarkable. All of the ads are period, the system maps are period, etc.

    6. I don’t have a favorite niche museum per se, but have you ever seen the website/newsletter called Atlas Obscura? They are full of oddities and niche sights/museums. Some of those are bound to be good for future trip planning!

      2. The Rodin museum is lovely; Paris has a number of small museums that are worth an afternoon, like the Dali museum (more like a gallery) in Montmartre and the Musée Jacquemart-André, which is a house museum that features both art and the beautiful residence.

        In the same vein, I liked the Chagall and Matisse museums in Nice. In Rome, the Museo Borghese was fantastic, especially because it had a number of pieces that specifically were designed for rooms in that house.

        In the US, the Corning Glass museum in Corning, New York is pretty great, but I love glass generally and art glass specifically.

    8. This is not *exactly* a museum, but I did the Sun Studio tour in Memphis many years back, and it was great. It’s not much of a tour, mostly just one big room, but an enormous amount of rock and roll history took place there, and I found it really fascinating.

    9. Not having been alive during the time period, I think the Sixth Floor Museum in Dallas is fabulous. It’s a museum on the sixth floor of the book depository building where Lee Harvey Oswald shot JFK. The museum does a great job walking you through the time period, JFK’s presidency, the shooting, and the fall-out. It’s a go-to for taking out-of-towners and especially out-of-town baby boomers.

      1. Agree! I don’t know that I’d want to do it more than once, but I loved it. They did a really good job with the space.

    10. Pharmacy Museum in New Orleans (it’s tiny, but only $5! and a nice way to fill 45 mins). Civil War medical museum in Frederick, MD. There’s also a medical museum at NIH and one in Philly, I believe. I love offbeat museums!

      1. I’m not sure if it’s the same as the medical museum at NIH, but my mother, a pathologist, loves the National Museum of Health and Medicine outside of DC, and she always squeezed in a visit when we traveled to DC. (I’ve never been, as I get grossed out just hearing about the exhibits there.) Next time she’s in New Orleans, I’ll suggest the pharmacy museum.

    11. SF: Cable Car Museum. DC: National Building Museum; National Cathedral (especially the Bishop’s Garden); Woodrow Wilson House (history nerd kid me loved it). Agree with the Capuchin Crypt. I also went to Sedlec near Budapest, another ossuary. Venice: Jewish Ghetto.

    12. The Tenement Museum in NYC is really great. Amsterdam has a fun houseboat museum of just cats – I liked it, but I really like cats. The Hemingway House Museum in Key West is also great for all the cats there (as well as the Hemingway stuff).
      More of a traditional museum, but the Thyssen Bornemisza museum in Madrid is one of my favorite museums ever – it’s basically this one family’s art collection but arranged to show the evolution of western art starting with the 13th century and through today. You start at the top of the museum and work your way down and it’s just the most amazing, engrossing experience seeing how all this art evolved period to period.

    13. I love sculpture gardens, including the ones at the Rodin Museum in Paris and MOMA in NYC. New Orleans has a beautiful, free sculpture garden in City Park, and it’s one of my favorite places to spend an hour or two. I’ll echo the suggestion of the Dali Museum in St. Petersburg–it also has a sculpture garden, but it’s incredible inside too.

      1. Walker Art museum sculpture garden in Mpls, Paradise Garden in Sumerville, GA (home and folk art shrine of the late Howard Finster), the 24-hour Church of Elvis in Portland (which now may be defunct).

    14. Barcelona Maritime Museum. Right on the paseando on the way to the Colon Monument, Aquarium, etc.

      Drumheller (Alberta, Canada) — Royal Tyrell Museum (best dinosaur museum anywhere and close to the Dinosaur Provincial Park for fossil hunting, hiking, camping)

    15. Museum of the Rockies – Bozeman, MT. Phenomenal dinosaur exhibit (all locally sources) – not extensive, but is focused and is good at describing how we know what we know about dinosaurs. The museum itself only has two other exhibit rooms (one on MT history and the other as a travelling exhibit), so it’s pretty easy to digest.

      3. Great museum. I planned a 500 person reception there any everyone loved it. Good for kids too.

    16. Not really a “favorite” in the enjoyment sense, but one of the museums that has had the most profound effect on me is the Museum of Terror in Budapest, which is about the series of brutal regimes that Hungary was under starting in the 40s and is very immersive. I literally needed to sit down on the sidewalk outside and have a piece of chocolate after I walked out. You go through the museum from top to bottom and the basement is all the old cells from when the military police used the building for holding and interrogations. You are allowed to walk in to the cells, but I never got beyond the doorway because by that point in the experience I was so scared and paranoid that I thought it was a real possibility the cell door would close behind me. Obviously even if that happened as some sort of gimmick it would have opened again shortly, but that museum got me out of all rational head space.

      1. Very effecting museum. And especially interesting if you also visit communist museums in Berlin and Prague.

    17. Thanks everyone! This was so interesting to read all the responses – I only expected a handful, but now have much to Google. :)

    18. Cabinet War Rooms: London. Not really a museum but showcases the WW2 underground cabinet
      Orsay: Paris
      National museum: Delhi (oldest exhibits are 7000 years old)

    19. The Wolfsonian Museum in Miami and the Renwick Gallery in DC. Both are smaller and focus on craft and design.
      I love all these answers!

  6. There’s always so much talk about paying off student loans as fast as possible on here. Do any of you just accept that you’re on a 10 year payment plan and leave it at that?

    I make my payments on time, and I sometimes throw extra money at them, but at the end of the day, I don’t see value in delaying life for student loans. I save aggressively for retirement, have an emergency fund, and pay my mortgage. But I’d also rather go to Hawaii with DH for a week now, while I’m young enough to look good in a bikini and before we have kids, instead of delaying all my fun until we retire. And I won’t delay having kids for student loans either, it just seems silly to me.

    1. My husband is like you. He just pays his 10 year payment amount every month and doesn’t bother with anything else. His interest rates are sub-2% though.

      I’m on a 25-year IBR repayment plan though and I refuse to have this hanging over me that long. I can’t always afford the 10 year payment amounts. Those are more in line with my goal payments every month but my income varies so I don’t feel comfortable switching my payment plan.

      That being said, I try to focus on paying extra but don’t put my life on hold. We still go on vacations, I have a newish iPhone and bought a refurb MacBook, we go out to eat, etc. as much as I’d like to say I’m Dave Ramsey gazelle intense about paying it off, I’m not. Because even if I were, I’d still be looking at a 6-7 year timespan and I don’t want to put things off that long.

    2. I honestly think I might feel differently if I were married, but who knows if that will happen? If I’m going to be the only one paying for my life and my future kid’s life (adopted or otherwise – both cost $$), I need to be debt free first.

      1. Also, 10 years is doable. If I paid regular payments, it would still take me 25 years. No thank you.

    3. I accept that I will have my loans for a very, very long time. I like to live my life and other things are a priority for me. YES, I know I will pay more over the life of the loan, but I’d rather go out to dinner with my friends once or twice a month than put that $50 towards my loan. I want to be happy now versus scrimping to pay more than whatever my payment plan tells me to and being unhappy about it. I have no kids, no spouse, I own a house, I save for retirement, I have a decent savings account (will cover at least 6 months emergency), and I have no debt other than my mortgage and student loans. It works for me.

    4. I’m in PSLF so I am in a 10 year plan and that’s it. I have a sheet with my 120 payments and I check one box every month.

      1. Same here. I made a spreadsheet with a countdown to my freedom date and I get a lot of joy out of inputting that one payment on all six loans every month. Under three years on my four little loans!

      2. I just got on to PSLF… sigh. I made my first qualifying payment this month. It is a long road. But it is a much shorter road than trying to make it through 6 figures of student loan debt, and ultimately will save me a truckload of money. And that forgiveness will come in my mid-late 30’s, so, really not the end of the world, even compared to my peers who took on the 10 year plan.

      3. My friends on it are concerned that the tax free forgiveness will be changed and they’ll start taxing it. Do others have that concern?

        If I paid the current minimums on my IBR for the full 25 years there would be a very high 5-figure amount forgiven and I’d be looking at a substantial tax bill. Less than the forgiven amount obviously, but it’s still another incentive for me to pay it off ahead of schedule.

          1. That’s an administrative mistake. There are administrative mistakes in any program. If an administrative mistake were the death knell of anything, everything would be dead.

          2. Like remember when colleges accidentally sent acceptance letters to kids who were rejected? Does that indicate that college is going to eliminated? No. That’s an administrative mistake.

        2. I don’t know the specifics of the tax forgiveness but I was told the program is written into my promissory note and cannot rescind the program to folks who have already graduated. If PSLF were retracted I would default.

    5. I would never put off kids because I had a loan payment, assuming I felt like I could comfortably provide for my child(ren), but “I’d also rather go to Hawaii with DH for a week now, while I’m young enough to look good in a bikini” comes across as kind of spoiled, not to mention vain and silly (I’m pretty sure Helen Mirren looks a lot better in a bikini than I do!) I’m not saying people with loan payments shouldn’t ever take vacations, but this reasoning that you should get to have fun while you’re young and carefree sounds kind of… entitled, I guess? You made the decision to take on such massive debt, maybe you should have to live a lifestyle that’s not necessarily super fun until it’s paid off. I guess from a financial standpoint, it depends a lot on how you define “week in Hawaii.” Certainly you can do Hawaii on a budget, and if it’s for a milestone anniversary or something I don’t think it’s in unreasonable. But, yeah, I side-eye people with $200K in loan debt who fly to Hawaii annually and stay at the Four Seasons. It’s this same sort of “I want it all and I want it right now” thinking that led to the housing crisis. You don’t have to vacay in Hawaii in your 20s or 30s, just like you don’t have to have a McMansion. Life is long and there will be time for more indulgence once you’ve reached a more comfortable financial spot.

      1. No, you should be side-eyeing people who put that Hawaii vacation completely on a credit card that they might just barely pay off before next year’s vacation. The key is to budget and not take on MORE debt, not to live like a monk when you’re making six figures.

        Also, while was also a little put off by the “while I still look good in a bikini” comment, the point is still valid. I, for one, lived like a monk in college and law school while all my friends went to concerts and bars and restaurants that I couldn’t afford. I refused to take out debt to do those things then. Now that I’m in biglaw, I’m not going to waste what’s left of my 20s and 30s not doing fun things that I’m going to “age out of” soon, either because I won’t feel like going to bars/concerts/drunkenly frolicking on the beach, or I’ll have kids whose needs (and expenses) I’ll have to put first.

        I often wonder, these people who say you shouldn’t have fun until you pay off your debt – are they super un-fun people or did their parents finance all of their fun in college so they don’t feel the need to do that now?

        1. Uh, I’m a pretty fun person, but I don’t think fun always requires spending money. Sometimes yes, sometimes no. Also, my parents were solidly middle class, I was the poorest one of my friends in college, and those loans are consolidated with my law school loans now. Parents paid what they could which wasn’t much.

      2. Deciding to have children while still in major debt is 100% the same as the choices that you so strongly judge; it just reflects different priorities. Try side-eyeing less, even sunglasses won’t hide those wrinkles when you go on your Hawaiian vacation at 75.

        1. I’m child-free and travel a ton, including to Hawaii, so your assumptions are off-base. And I’ll proudly hit the beach at 75, wrinkles and all!

          It’s not just about different priorities for spending your cash. Hawaii will always be there. The ability to have biological kids (and grandparents who are alive and able to enjoy them) won’t be.

    6. Mine are technically on a 25 and 15 year plan, but I make extra payments that will have me paying them off 10 years after graduation. The original plan (like, the when I started law school plan) was to get a biglaw job and pay them back in about 5 years (this, incidentally, was not a crazy plan when I started law school because the criteria for getting a biglaw job from my school were basically “are you a warm body with a law degree”). Then 2008 happened and I couldn’t start making extra payments until about 5 years after graduation. But yea, I pay some extra, but not as much as I could and I’m not really putting my life on hold that much (there are some international trips I’d like to take that I haven’t, but that’s about it). I don’t intend to ever have children.

    7. This has sort of been my plan and I was happy with it until now, when I have one child and would like another. It feels like we can’t afford a second because of my student loan payment, so I am looking into the best ways to pay it off as quickly as we can while still saving for emergencies, retirement, a new house, etc. I would love not to have this burden on my shoulders at this point in my life, which I guess is why people tell you to pay it all off ASAP! I will say, we did take some fab trips and enjoy life a lot before the little one came, and I don’t necessarily regret that. But MAN do I feel trapped by the loans now!! That being said, it doesn’t have to be all-or-nothing. Pay ahead a bit and enjoy life in moderation?

      1. This!!!! I want to have kids in the next 3-5 years, and plan to go it alone if I don’t meet someone in that time. Daycare payments will equal the minimum payments if I had stuck with the 10 year plan.

        My plan is to pay off my loans by the end of the year and start putting most of the money towards a future daycare fund. That way, if I have a lower paying job when I have kids (which 99.% likely I will) I will not be continently worried about money. And if I can afford daycare out of my paychecks at the time, it will roll into a college fund for future kids.

    8. 30 yr plan here — 2.8% interest rate and $300 payment. When I first started working in biglaw and even as a fed clerk, for the first 5-6 yrs, I was paying a lot extra; making payments of about $700/month rather than $300. Now that I’m 11 yrs out and gone thru an unemployment stint and am not in biglaw, I’ve slowed down a lot and pretty much just pay what is due. At this point, if I pay nothing extra, I will be done at age 43 — so an 18 yr repayment of a 30 yr loan. To me that’s fine, though I know people find it shocking bc they believe in paying it all off in 5 yrs or whatever. I still will pay a bit extra, but it may just be an extra few hundred (total) put in for the whole yr, so maybe that knocks repayment forward a bit. Overall though, I feel “safer” having liquid savings and not handing it all off to Citibank to pay off a sub 3% loan.

      1. Same here, except slightly lower interest rate (early 2000 graduation dates for the win!). We got rid of all the private loans as soon as possible throwing everything extra and every bonus at them (buh-bye sallie!) and only have gov’t ones left. At this point, we pay the regularly monthly payment and live our lives.

      2. Big difference here might be interest rate. I would consider that with an under 3% rate, but not at the over 7% I have

    9. We did a balance, but were pretty focused on paying off our loans. We prioritized fairly nice housing (nothing crazy) because it was important to us, and took a nice honeymoon (it was a once-in-a-lifetime trip, not an annual thing) and ate out 1-3 times a week because we prioritized that in our budget, but other than those items we lived very frugally. My husband worked some crazy overtime hours and any extra money went to loans. We paid them off right before our son was born, and honestly our finances would be REALLY hard if we were making loan payments and paying daycare (which is $1200 a month). That was one of my biggest motivators to have them paid off before we had kids.

    10. i thought i’d pay them off right away, but I decided to take the balanced road. I prioritized my higher % loans (federal) since it seemed like my variable (tied to Prime) private loans wouldn’t increase much (it was a gamble I knowingly took) and I still haven’t paid those off.

      I had a classmate that put all his spare money into loans and paid them off in 3-4 years but didn’t save for retirement; I took the balanced route and have about 70k left in no/low interest but got to take advantage of the 2011 through 2014 rise in the market through my retirement savings.

      Some people hate paying interest, whereas, I’m okay paying a little bit more in interest over the years, if it means I’ll have some saved in retirement.

    11. From reading these comments, it seems like interest rates may have an effect on how people are approaching their loans. For context, my federal loan interest rates range from 6.5-7.65% interest (2013 grad, ugh). The balance is scarily approaching $200k. The 10 year standard repayment for me would be ~$2,300/mo. I make $65k before taxes. Thankfully, I am on PAYE. Given these numbers, it makes more financial sense for me to pay the minimum and save up for the huge tax hit I will take once the balance of the loans are forgiven in 20+ years (assuming they will still be forgiven).

      FWIW, you can also take a week-long trip to Hawaii (hotel, flight, rental car, bfast buffet) for less than $3k per couple on CostcoTravel.

      1. This is basically our plan (my husband and I graduated law together, so we have double the loans and double the future tax hit) and reading threads about paying off loans always stresses me out. I refuse to sacrifice our enjoyment of life and having children to throw more money at our loans. It may not be the most sensible plan, but for now we’d rather worry about the tax hit in 20 years (and figure that we’ll be in a much better financial position at that point) than be broke now.

      2. Same. My loan balance isn’t that high, but I’m a 2011 grad (yayyyyyyyyy) with 70k. Well, it was 70k when I graduated, but then it ballooned to 93k because, when you’re in forbearance because you’re unemployed and dead broke, interest accrues and then capitalizes. My interest rate is 6.8%, all federal loans.

        I’ve gone back and forth over paying extra v. saving more. Now that I’ve got an emergency fund and a decent chunk of change in savings, I’m trying to pay more.

        If I pay only the minimum payment over 25 years, I’ll pay the loan off in 18 years and pay about 66k more in interest than I’ve already payed (don’t even want to think about it). If I pay double the minimum payment, I can pay them off in about 7 years and I pay about 18k in interest. So simply by doubling my payments, which at this point I can afford to do, I save myself 50k over the long run.

        I dunno, maybe I’m stupid and doing it wrong. But my interest rate is so high on that balance that if I only pay the minimums I feel like I’m just throwing 10k at loans and getting only 1k of reduction. If I had a lower interest rate I’d probably pay them off more slowly.

    12. In my opinion, there is nothing wrong with this balanced approach if (a) you are currently living within your means and not taking on more credit card debt for vacations or other expenses (it sounds like you are), and (b) you don’t anticipate a move to a job where it would be hard to afford your loan payments. I have a one-year-old, and I wish DH and I had taken one more real vacation before we had kids. On the other hand, I’m job-hunting and anticipate making less at my next job, and I’m super happy my loans are paid off.

    13. I don’t have much debt (undergrad only) and DH is incredibly frugal/pays cash for everything so we’ve been focused on paying extra, but not at the expense of some fun along the way. My issue with systems like Dave Ramsey’s is that I don’t want to eat rice and beans for 2 years in order to pay my loans off faster. I like to eat out and buy new clothes and we can still afford to pay extra on our loans and mortgage so I think there’s a lot to be said for knowing what you’re comfortable spending and living within those means.

  7. I found out yesterday that I didn’t get a job that I really wanted. Apparently it was down to me and another person, and it was a really close decision. I’m feeling pretty crushed and just can’t focus on my work today. Any advice on getting over this and focusing on the job I currently have (which I don’t like)?

      1. Clothes. Treat yo self.

        Fragrances. Treat yo self.

        Massages. Treat yo self.

        Mimosas. Treat yo self.

        Fine leather goods. Treat yo self!

      2. Spent my lunch break filling my J Crew and Nordstrom carts and scheduling a massage for Friday!

    2. No real advice, but I fear I’m going to be in your shoes soon. Hugs. Can you take a personal day and just go home and wallow with wine and chocolate and Netflix?
      On a more practical note, let them know you’re disappointed but you remain interested in the position or other opportunties with the company. You never know what will happen. Maybe the person’s spouse will get a job across the country in six months and the position will be open again and they’ll think of you, or maybe another job will pop up that they think you could be a fit for. Stranger things have definitely happened!

          2. If she hasn’t seen the first season, sure. But there is only one new episode for UnReal. OINTB is having the whole new season come out Friday, I believe.

    4. I was you a couple of months ago. I didn’t get a job that I REALLY wanted. I bawled my eyes out in giant, full body wracking sobs for the better part of the evening when they turned me down. Really more of a reflection of how much I wanted to escape the job I was in than missing out on that opportunity, fwiw. Now I’m in a new job I love and I’m working with really awesome people. I could not be happier. I did not get that position several months ago because this job was just around the corner for me. The same will happen for you. Better things are coming.

      1. Thanks for this. I’m not an “everything happens for a reason” person, but I keep trying to tell myself that careers are long and this isn’t the only job in the world.

  8. I moved across the country for a ‘dream job’ about a year ago. Turns out a lot of things I was told in making my decision to take this leap aren’t turning out to be the case, most notably, when I was told I there would only be 2 people senior to me in the department. Turns out that there are only 4 people in my department anyway, and the fourth person was just promoted so now she is technically senior to me. We struggle with staffing (not for lack of interest, it’s a very desirable and famous company), but the truth is we’re really cheap and ‘rely’ on interns (which is obviously ridiculous and arguably unethical/illegal). We have one admin who is not helpful at all and I just found out that the admin (who was temping) is now full time, solely because the head of my department doesn’t like to deal with details and would rather keep someone mediocre than try to find someone skilled.

    I guess I’m just at a loss. I came in-house to escape a big firm where I burned out, but I’m burning out at this rate too since I lack any modicum of support staff here. I love the new work I’m doing but I don’t think here is the place for me. But now I’m in a new place without a lot of friends or family (except a DH who is great but the isolation out here for both of us is affecting our relationship) and I have daily frustrations and burnout from my job and it’s just a bad situation. I want to get another year in here before I leave (if I can last that long), but what can I do? Can I ‘rely’ on bad admin to do things and let her fail? Part of the problem is I stay late and deliver my own work late (stressing me out) because I have to do her work. My boss knows she is of limited help but again, doesn’t do anything about it. So back to the question, do I let her fail so my boss gets it in his head that this is bad? How do I make the best of this? At a minimum I’m here until the end of the year to get a bonus which makes up a good chunk of my comp so I don’t want to leave before that.

    Help? Commiseration? I don’t know.

    1. What tasks are you relying on the admin for? I rarely use our admin, other than to mail things for me, so I guess my advice would depend on what she’s doing for you. What you described with your admin seems pretty common across a lot of companies. I would be really annoyed that you were pitched only 2 people senior to you.

  9. Do you have a system for storing and backing up your photos? My phone is full. I upload them all to Photos on my Mac, which I find to be pretty disorganized but at least mostly chronological. I thought they were also uploaded to the Cloud, but apparently they are deleted from the Cloud when you delete them from your phone, so that doesn’t work for storage, only backup. (Or is there a way around that? I’d love to use the Cloud as storage.)

    I thought the solution was to buy an external hard drive, copy the photos to the external hard drive, and organize them there by month and year. Then they’d be on the external hard drive, and on my Mac, and I could delete them from my phone. But when the guy at the Apple store showed me how to load them onto the EHD (aka did it for me), they didn’t all copy over– only random ones did. I want to try again, but I’m afraid I’ll make it even more of a disaster. Does anyone have an easier way?

      1. This! And Google will back up your photos on your Mac automatically and for free (up to a certain amount).

    2. I use DropBox. The app lets you upload them from your phone to DB anytime you are on WiFi. I haven’t organized anything in DB, but I am sure it can be done. I am lazy because the reality is, I almost never go into DB to grab pics because my faves are on FB and IG.

    3. I put them on my computer and back them up on an external hard drive. I just drag the photo file to the hard drive and when it asks, skip copying the files that are duplicates. What I keep meaning to do is buy a second hard drive, duplicate the first one, and leave one copy in my safe deposit box in the event my apartment burns down or something.

      1. Will it ask me that automatically? I’d love to just drag all the photos over to the hard drive, and if it will ask me to leave out the duplicates, that would be perfect. I guess they might all be different.

        How often do you do this? What you’ve described is what I want to do, but I think it might be hard right now because I’m dealing with three or four years of photos. If I can wade through this, it seems it would be a lot easier to do it once a month or so.

        1. Mine automatically asks, but my laptop has Windows. No idea how Mac’s operating system functions, but I assume it would be similar.

          I would like to say I do it regularly, but truthfully it’s whenever I think about it. Usually after I’ve just taken a bunch of pictures somewhere interesting that I would hate to lose. I’m not regularly backing up the 12 billion pictures I take of my cats.

      2. I go the external hard drive route too. I got burned years ago with an Internet photo company that went out of business. They sent notification to an email address I didn’t really use anymore so I missed the window to move them. Totally my fault but I like to rely on my own tech now.

    5. I don’t know how well this works with Mac, but I copy all my photos to a folder on our hard drive and then back that up with Carbonite so that if the house burns down and takes the computer with it I can still recover them.

    6. I manually upload from my phone to my Mac every month or so, then I backup the iPhoto library onto an EHD. I just drag the library itself onto the EHD, and then wait forever while it copies (my photos go back 11 years, jeeze! and I haven’t figured out how to use TimeMachine or something like that to only copy over new files within the iPhoto library, so I just do it when I don’t need the computer for an hour) and then check to make sure all the pics came over by using the “view files in library function” or whatever. I think it might be really annoying in the future if I abandon iPhoto, because everything is in folders and subfolders, but for now, it works and should keep things safe if/when my cat/kid spills water on the computer (again).

  10. Just had a short feedback session with my supervisor at work.
    He said that I lack ownership of the whole process when I am working on a specific topic (I am in consulting) and that my slides require several iterations before being client ready.
    I will be working on the quality of my slides, but I have difficulty in doing a couple things and was hoping the hive could help:
    1- How to stay focused when several things pop in a day. I used to write a to do list but not sure if there are tweaks to that.
    2- How do you build the accuracy of assessing how long a piece of work would take you. Do you time yourself on some specific assignments? any tips? I often committed on handing a model by 10 only to end up finishing at 12 because I had no idea how long it would take. I work continuously so the delay is all me not due to taking breaks etc.
    3- How do you show improvement when other team members are all stars. Because the workload was crazy for me as a beginner, the supervisor got another person from another office to join my workstream. He is bright and confident, and my supervisor made comparisons between us even if I have been on the job 3 months and the other guy 11 months. I know I will ramp up but meanwhile I don’t always want to be outshined. How do I showcase my work and improvement without looking like “me too me too”

    1. Number 1 is really a matter of prioritizing things. If it is an option, only check your email at certain times of the day (every 2 hours, for example). On number 2, if I am telling someone I will have an assignment back to them (assuming the aren’t giving me the deadline) I always overestimate the time it will take me, often by an entire day. That way it looks like I am getting it to them “early” if I get it done in the time it should take, and I’m still on time even if delays pop up.

    2. 1. Keep making to-do lists in your mind… I sometimes just take a break and go to the bathroom where I think about what I should be doing *just now* when there are multiple things competing for my attention.
      2. Underpromise, and overdeliver and all that. Really pad your time estimates because you err on the side of underestimating.
      3. I’ve been in this position and it’s hard. Don’t compete, cooperate with the star performer. Work closely with him and learn his tricks, even if it’s just to use Outlook folders more effectively for email than you do. Become his best friend and learn from him and feed off each other. The shine can rub off on you as well, and who knows maybe he can learn something from you. At the very least you will be a team player.

    3. 1. Write down a to-do list. I’m consulting, there is always too many things to keep track of in your head.
      2. Experience. Crappy answer, I know, but it’s true. Depending on what it is, say you will look at it and let them know in 30 min. It will help you scope.
      3. Stay close with your manager. Give an update of your activities begore the day starts, and update when the day us over. If something is going too long or thete is an issue, raise it up. Communicate, communicate and over communicate. Ask for help, from other team members and your manager. You’re in consulting, the last thing you should feel is lacking resources. Also, make sure to schedule a 30 minute touch point every 2 weeks… that’s how I know a team member is serious about development.

  11. I’ve come to grips with the fact that I likely have trichotillomania. I’ve been pulling out my hair since law school, through bar prep, and during the past four years of big law practice. A friend recently commented that I used to have thick hair.

    Is anyone out there in the same boat? If so, did you get diagnosed? How did you treat it? Did you try acupuncture? I need to get a hold of this before it keeps getting worse.

    1. Time to see your doctor. Go from there. May need some help with CBT +/- psychiatry, but you can definitely move past this.

    2. Could this be a reaction to stress/anxiety? It sounds like it may be based on the fact that it correlates with law school, the bar, and big law.

      My experience probably won’t be super helpful, but I used to do this when I was a small child (3-5ish?) so I don’t really have any good memory of how I stopped doing it, but I do remember doing it when I was incredibly afraid/anxious. Now I’m just a nail biter.

    3. My son has it. His therapist recommended a series of behavioral modifications (I don’t recall what they were-one was using strength putty to keep his hands occupied, I think?) There are also good books on the topic (as I recall from her office). She was a PhD, I think this is a very common issue and a good therapist could help you. I don’t know about acupuncture. Good luck!

  12. Thoughts on jumpsuits? I want to get something new for a nice but not Fancy dinner out for my anniversary. And I am so bored by every dress I’ve found at Nordstrom and my other usual suspects. I have seen a couple of jumpsuits (long, plain back) that look like they would be a fun canvas for cute shoes or jewelry and maybe a little more modern than a dress. But is the jumpsuit thing over? Am I too old / not trendy enough? I am mid-30s and generally dress in pretty classic styles. I am oddly terrified to try it— I don’t want to look silly.

    1. I have a black jumpsuit that sounds a lot like the ones you are seeing and it is like wearing fancy pajamas. I love it. All of that said, going to the bathroom is a huge PIA because you have to basically take the whole thing off. But I still love it. I think the right ones look classy and fancy and can be dressed up as you have mentioned. Order a bunch from Nordstrom and try them on – what do you have to lose!?

    3. I don’t think they’re over. One of my friends wore a fancy jumpsuit to a fancy party we were at and she looked chic as F**k. I think you do need to have a pretty good behind though since they tend to accentuate that. I say go for it! Like anything, you just need to carry it well and not feel self-conscious.

    4. I am your same age and I am a total convert to jumpsuits. I love them as a substitute for a dress at artsier/funkier galas, for example. The Banana Republic wide-leg jumpsuit, for example – I love wearing that with cute shoes and an interesting clutch for evening stuff.

    5. YES. But keep in mind that if your SO is not fashiony, then s/he may not understand.

      Signed,
      Diana (whose husband doesn’t understand the jumpsuit that I love and would ‘prefer you wear anything else’)

      2. This made me laugh, my H is very into men’s fashion, but doesn’t get women’s and HATES my jumpsuits. I however, love them & wear often.

      3. Haha, this is how my husband felt about those flowy, wide-leg capris (gaucho pants?) that were in a while back. He is not otherwise into fashion at all, but for some reason had some strong feelings about those, haha!

    6. I rock them constantly and I am older than you. Love them. I’ve had great luck finding several at Zara.

    7. I thought jumpsuits were something you wear when out with your girlfriends because men generally don’t like them. Maybe your husband is the exception but I’d probably stick with a dress.

    1. BBQ! So many BBQ options (hopefully you’re not vegetarian). Spend time near the Plaza, even though the stores are generally chain stores, it’s a cute area to walk around and get drinks. Very cool art museum. If you’re into soccer, their soccer team is good and games are super fun. We did a “gangsters history” tour a few years ago (on a bus, with drinks and narration) that was really interesting if you’re into early 20th century history.

    2. Try and go to a jazz club or the jazz museum/explore 18th and Vine. There’s a Negro leagues museum around there as well. Walk around the Crossroads (artsy area downtown – also a little chain store-y, but they sometimes have nice art events/festivals/first Friday type things). Art museum is the Nelson Atkins, and it’s very nice, and the lawn area is really fun to walk around on a nice day. If you are into war history, the WWI museum is supposed to be amazing although I haven’t been. Brunch in Brookside or at City Market. My favorite restaurants in KC are Extra Virgin (there’s a fancier restaurant next door by the same chef)and Bluestem.

    3. Plaza for shopping, Power & Light District for going out, there’s a nice art museum and a WWI museum. Royals game if they are in town. Worlds of Fun if you’re into roller coasters. Lots of KC BBQ.

      1. Definitely the WWI museum. I loved it (but I do the Nerd Tour of Everything).

    4. Steamboat Arabia.

      Koala Flats at the Kansas City Zoo (the koalas are only there for a few months).

      Jesse James Farm & Museum.

      Tours of the Harley Davidson, Boulevard Brewing Company, The Roasterie & Moon Marble Company plants.

      Muelbach Hotel downtown, now part of the Marriott. It was called the Western White House when Truman was president, and you can actually stand on his brass footprints where he held up the “Dewey defeats Truman” headline.

  15. I am not in the working world yet as I am just finishing high school but I LOVE wearing business suits! I started the year wearing them at least once a week but for the last term I have been in them almost every day. I will probably continue through the summer as I have an internship position at a real estate office before I go to college.

  16. Anyone here also follow the FB page for this blog? There is an article from the Guardian on it now about how academics aren’t permitted to be “feminine”, relying on an extremely narrow definition of feminine, including high heels and “flowing” hair (whatever that means; I’ve given many a successful academic paper with my long hair pulled back off my face in a barrette, but never up like I’ve seen recommended for lawyers so many times on this blog–I save that look for going out someplace fancy.) The idea that there are many ways to be feminine seems never to have occurred to the author. Academia is full of people who wanted to escape corporate bs, including the dress codes that are so often featured here (wearing a watch to an interview says that a job applicant is “detail-oriented” Snort! The wrong kind of pants or shoes can prevent you from doing your job, as you’ll be thrown out of court). GIVE ME A BREAK. One of the best things about academia is not needing to pay attention to that kind of crap. I can wear whatever I like, sit how I want, be comfortable, do what I need to do to think. I have no idea how lawyers manage to write well or think deeply with all the fussy bs they are required to attend to.

    1. Yes, but studies show that students base their teaching evaluations in large part on how professors look, and female students are particularly tough on female faculty in the US. So, yes, professors can largely wear what they want, but they are still judged on it, at least by students, and it may affect their career.

    2. I haven’t seen the article you’really referring to, but there is something to the idea that in academia you should only be paying attention to your work and not care about your appearance (and you’ve in fact hinted at this attitude in your post). I have had conversations with other academic women who are also interested in fashion and like to wear heels and get blowouts (for example) and everyone has had this commented on negatively usually by other women. This sounds similar. And anon prof is right that this gets commented on in student evaluations.

  17. I’m going to be in Kingston, ON for a few days and am wondering if anyone has any suggestions for places to eat.

      1. I saw that on the list of interesting places, especially for brunch. Fortunately, I’ll be there over a weekend.

        Thanks for the suggestion!

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