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For busy working women, the suit is often the easiest outfit to throw on in the morning. In general, this feature is not about interview suits for women, which should be as classic and basic as you get — instead, this feature is about the slightly different suit that is fashionable, yet professional. Also: we just updated our big roundup for the best women's suits of 2024!
I don't remember why I was at J.McLaughlin's website the other day, but this pretty “mid-blue” suit caught my eye. (They're showing it with a fun blue sweater with stripes the same color, and it's lovely.)
When I came back today, I was happy to see that it's on sale — the blazer was $398, but is now marked to $250, and the pants were $228, but are now marked to $149. But — now you can also take an extra 30% off sale styles, with the discount applied at checkout, so the blazer comes down to $175, and the pants come down to $105. Nice (but: final sale).
The pieces are available in sizes 0-14.
If you're hunting for colorful suits, note that light blue suits for summer are some of the easiest because you can wear them as you would a light gray suit. As of June 2024, we're seeing nice ones at Reiss, Brooks Brothers, and Hugo Boss, . On the more affordable side, find blue suits at Ann Taylor (“blue echo,” ojai, and a plaid), Banana Republic Factory, from Tahari, and Eloquii.
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- Target – Circle week, deals on 1000s of items
- White House Black Market – Buy one, get one – 50% off full price styles
anon
I would really like to travel with my sister and her family but their travel budget is much smaller. Is there any way to offer to pay without it being awkward? She is married with kids.
Anonymous
Go somewhere cheaper.
Anon
I don’t think so. Is there a way to plan something fun within their budget? You can always take them to lunch or dinner somewhere nice once you get there, or plan and pay for an excursion.
Ses
I’ve threaded this needle by paying for the kids (their flights and meals). That way it’s about wanting to see them and being an aunt rather than subsidising the adults and them feeling awkward.
Anon
In the same position with a cousin but we don’t actually have enough money to pay for them to go the places we would like to go and she is not a planner so won’t suggest anything cheaper except for crashing at her father’s cabin. It’s a nice place but I’ve been there about 400 times and want to go some new places too. Commiseration!
Anon
I suppose I get the cousin’s point of view on this one. Why make things complicated if the point is to see each other and enjoy each other’s company? I’d probably feel resentful being made to spend money when the free and enjoyable option is available. You aren’t wrong to want new things–it’s just I’ve been your cousin and I understand their viewpoint.
anon
Agree. I would save “exploring new places” for other people.
Anon
It’s because it’s the cheapest option for her, but it’s hard for us to get to. She can get there in six hours driving and for us it’s a 14 hour drive or a flight plus 3 hour drive. Flights are typically very expensive in the summer because it’s a destination area for vacations. I was happy to accommodate many times, but I also need some closer options that work better for us.
anon
That’s fair.
Anon
I had a boss once who asked me about my vacation and I said we’d spent it visiting family. He said that visiting family isn’t a vacation. You need to visit family, but you also need to vacation. I’ve always remembered what he said & when I’m on some drag of a trip I didn’t really want to because it’s a family thing, I remind myself that this isn’t my vacation.
Anonymous
I blame points for this even if it’s not 100% true. “I rack up a ton of points because of work, let me take care of everyone’s flights and rental house.”
Anon
+1. This is the way to go.
Anon
This is the way to do it.
Anokha
+3 to saying that I am using points (whether true or not)
Anon
Agree. I have also cited points and it always works.
anon
This is lovely, and a great way to do it.
anon
White lie – you have miles or points that are going to expire to take care of the hotel and/or airfare. Or, you bought an experience at a charity auction and want them to come.
Anon
My sister does this for me and I absolutely let her :)
Anonymous
Yep. White lie about points and or miles. My cousin did this recently and it would make sense for it to be true because of her job, but I didn’t push her on it.
Anon
This probably depends on family dynamics but in general I think it can be pretty awkward.
An exception might be if you were renting a house for like a month and invited them to join for a week; then they might feel like it was more like visiting you than a joint vacation.
anon
I’m close to my sisters, but if I did this, I suspect this would not go over well and would embarrass them. I’d just pick a cheaper place.
Anon
Same.
Anon
If it is about lodging/flights: You figure out what her budget is (let’s say it’s $2500), find a place/flight that you like, tell her she owes you $2500 and you pay the difference.
Anon
I mean, if she’s not dumb she’ll probably figure that one out.
Anon
Yeah this
Anonymous
Points or “I rented this house and it’s bigger than I need so come enjoy it with me!”
Anon
I like the points/miles idea.
Another one, if you can be candid with each other: “Kids are expensive and I can cover this. I know you would do the same for me if the positions were reversed.”
Anonymous
What we do is we book the hotels and tickets then we let my sister and her partner pay for meals. I know she doesn’t love it especially since I’m much younger, but it’s the only way to really see them.
anon
I’ve rented a house that’s within my budget, but big enough for others and just presented it as “come visit me at my vacation house.” I wouldn’t expect anyone to chip for mortgage/upkeep if they were visiting me at my (owned) vacation house, and figure why not get the benefit of having guests to my vacation house, but with much less expense and hassle than actually owning one!
Anon
I’ll go against the grain – I think that’s very generous and if I were your sister I would be overjoyed! Do you have a close and honest relationship with her? Can you offer to pay for all the lodging or all the airfare, perhaps for example, and then split the rest of the costs? The only way we (comfortably) manage a vacation every year is because my parents pay to rent a beach house and cover all the food for the house. I get that parents and siblings are a different dynamic, but I still think this is a thoughtful gesture on your part, and being offended seems like a weird reaction. It’s probably not a secret that you have more discretionary income than they do
Anon
I have a sister who makes a lot more than me and if she wanted to pay for a vacation, or more than 50% of a vacation, that she really wanted me to go on, I’d happily take her up on it. I probably wouldn’t do it every year, but yeah, if it was a once in a great while kind of thing, for sure. I’m going.
Jules
Same. One of my sisters – the youngest of us four – is very affluent and also very generous. She has a large second home in Florida and frequently invites other family members there, all of us for special occasions. One sister works for a non-profit and makes a good deal less than the rest of us and the richer sister pays for her flights for those occasions and jsut getaways, with no awkwardness or bad feelings. (It helps that these two are extremely close.)
Last Thanksgiving, the affluent sister wanted to celebrate two milestone birthdays – hers and our mother’s – in Arizona so her granddaughter in college in San Diego could come more easily, and she insisted on paying for everything, including the plane tickets, the large rental house and the meals. Each of us offered to pay for some of our own expenses or for something like a lunch, but she insisted, and we all just graciously accepted and thanked her for this incredible generosity.
Anonymous
I agree this can really work. I’ve been lucky enough to be in this situation and pick up the tab for family and close friends. I feel like I’m spending my money buying memories and they are spending their vacation time with me which is also precious. Honesty and sincere intentions make this work well, I think! I go for it with your sister!
Anon
I LOVE this shade of blue but it’s so hard to find!
Anonymous
Agree. This middle blue is elusive.
anon
And it’s one of my best colors!
Anonymous
have you seen kettlewell? https://www.kettlewellcolours.co.uk/us
Anonymous
The AC office wars have begun. My (individual) office is near two little old ladies who are freezing if it is under 80 degrees. They get into the office super early and get the building to jack up the heat. Our offices face east, so this side of the building bakes from the time the sun gets over the tallest high rise (around 10 am) until it’s overhead. If it’s 80 at 9 am then it’s 85+ by noon. When I get in around 9, I have to call the building to get them to shut off the heat and turn on the AC. I’m sure the building hates us. I really wish they would just tell these ladies no, we are not turning on the heat in the summer.
Anon
I don’t believe in making a federal, or even HR, case about everything, but OSHA standards are:
“OSHA recommends temperature control in the range of 68-76° F and humidity control in the range of 20%-60%.”
I would ask maintenance to put a clear locked box over the thermostat.
Anon
I would honestly love 76. It would save the planet in the summer.
anon
Yes, please check with maintenance. My husband does HVAC stuff for a large, corporate office. All thermostats are locked and calibrated. They often respond to hot and cold calls and can adjust vents and different things in the area.
Anonymous
Is this bizzaro world? Usually it’s men turning the office into an ice box.
Anon
This story is completely consistent with that. The older women are turning it into a furnace.
Nesprin
Get them space heaters and turn the AC to 72.
Anon
Space heaters or woolly socks and a sweater. For the little old ladies, obviously. Geez. “Mommy’s cold, everyone put on a sweater!” from the Family Circus.
Anonymous
What’s your favorite deodorant? Annoyed that the one I got at Sam’s club pops out of the dispensor with like 3” of product left. (Clinical Secret)
Anon
I use the Degree clinical kind and it works really well.
anon
I discovered I love the Harry’s deodorant available at Target after stealing a (new) stick from DH. I swear men’s deodorant is just better formulated.
Anon
Anything with Clinical in the name and I prefer Secret in the gel, not solid, form.
Anonymous
Dove, but I guess maybe I don’t sweat that much
Anonymous
Secret clinical soft solid–cannot break because it is a cream
Anon
I’ve been using Dove since it came out in…1998? My favorite is the one that doesn’t leave marks on 100+ colors in the purple scent, but I don’t mind other scents.
Anonymous
Mitchum stick or gel
Anon
Posting here since it is too late to do so in cmoms. My middle schooler wants to do a horseback riding camp that is very overpriced and slightly inconvenient (that part is ok though, I think)… on the one hand I want her to do fun things, but on the other hand, I am having a hard time justifying spending $$$ for something like this. We can certainly afford it, so it’s not a big push financially or anything. Thoughts? We are ok with doing camps where she pursues other interests/activities, but horseback riding feels different for some reason and I don’t know why.
Anon
I think the reason it may be different is that we can’t swing the money/time for her to develop skills and continued interest in it like she does in other activities.. lessons here cost like 150 an hour or 1300 for a summer camp for a week!
Lily
If she falls in love with riding after the camp, maybe you can look into other ways she could fund lessons. Like, could she work at the barn in exchange for lessons? Do they offer scholarships?
Anon
I don’t think that matters, as long as you’re upfront with her that she can’t continue into private lessons. Camp is still really fun and she will probably look forward to going year after year.
Anon
yes this is the benefit of camp. she can try something, doesnt mean she has to commit to it for life. my sister did lessons briefly as a kid, it was a bday gift one year. we went riding on a few family vacations growing up- in colorado, hawaii, west virginia. i once went to a circus camp…it was fun for a week, but i wasn’t looking to run off and join the circus
Anonymous
Yikes, where do you live that lessons cost $150/hour? $50-75 is the norm in my (admittedly MCOL) area. Also, is this a sleep away camp? Could there be a cheaper day camp you could try that would let her get a similar experience for less cost? (My barn, for example, runs a 9-2 pm “camp” for 3 days in the summer for $300)
Anon
Wait till you have to buy her a horse and pay to board it.
Anon
Why not, if she wants to do it and you can afford it?
Anon
This. We maybe go on 3-4 trail rides a year and it scratches the itch. We live in a city and horses aren’t a thing here but my autistic kiddo really loves them.
Anon
If she wants to do it and you can afford it, I would definitely let her do it. Horseback riding brings so many amazing benefits for girls, especially if the camp has them doing barn chores and all their own tacking and untacking. It can become a lifelong sport and source of endless enjoyment – and it doesn’t always have to cost a fortune either.
Lily
I think you should do it if you can afford it. Horseback riding is wonderful exercise and also a good opportunity to learn to take care of an animal. Some people find it therapeutic. Do you perceive it as snobby? I can’t figure out why else you would think less of this camp than others.
Anon
+1. That’s how I read it too.
Anon
I would let her do it if she wants to do it and you can afford it. My daughter is also doing horse camp this summer, but doesn’t otherwise ride.
Anon
I think it “feels different” because it’s hard to know when to stop. You stop archery and arts and crafts when they outgrow it. You stop softball camp when she decides she wants to run track of when she doesn’t make the team. You stop horseback riding when…?
Anon
When she loses interest or it becomes unaffordable or logistically infeasible? I dunno, it doesn’t really seem that different than other kid activities. I know many families who’ve quit activities because of cost, and many kids will lose interest in horseback riding the same way they would in softball.
Anon
The stereotype is that she will lose interest in horses when she gets interested in boys.
Anon
How his horseback riding any different? If she doesn’t want to do it, she doesn’t have to.
Anon
It’s not like doing one camp means she makes a lifelong commitment. Good grief. Let her have fun.
Anon
To all those snarking on my comment: my assumption is that she might *want* to continue riding. It is completely understandable to not want to get into activities that aren’t affordable to stay in long term. The family has enough money for expensive riding camps for at least some amount of time, so it’s not like the kids are used to hearing “we can’t afford that.”
Anon
“It is completely understandable to not want to get into activities that aren’t affordable to stay in long term.”
Most activities kids do can eventually get very expensive, I know people who spend five figures on tennis and travel baseball even though they aren’t as stereotypically expensive as horses.
This kid isn’t 5. You can be upfront with her about financial limits and that there won’t be private lessons in the future, but if she wants to do the camp now and they can afford this camp it doesn’t make sense to deny it because she might hypothetically fall in love with it and want to continue. And even if she does, it’s a good lesson that we can’t have everything we want.
Anon
Some people spend that on baseball; most do not.
Some people choose to simply not get into things that are not sustainable long term.
Why can’t she hear “no” now?
Anon
If the kids aren’t used to hearing “we can’t afford that” it’s all the more reason they need to hear it once in a while.
Anonymous
Questions I would ask myself:
1. Are you OK with the risks of horseback riding? I am not, so I’d say no for that reason.
2. What happens if she’s hooked and wants to take up riding as a hobby? Are you willing either to support it or to say a firm no? It’s fine if the camp is a one-time treat, but if that’s the case you need to make it clear up front and be willing to stick to it.
3. What is the likelihood that this camp will make my daughter realize that horses really aren’t that much fun and stop begging for riding lessons? That’s what happened for me after two sessions of Girl Scout horse camp where I spent more time mucking corrals and oiling saddles than riding and was repeatedly thrown and stomped on by ornery camp ponies. Those camps were a solid investment from my parents’ perspective.
I generally lean towards investing in experiences when possible and within reason. I have gone to great expense and dealt with massive inconvenience, including three summers of 4 hours’ daily driving between daytime sports practices and my own work commute, to make these experiences possible for my daughter. On the other hand, I’ve also said no to all sorts of things and my daughter seems to have grown up relatively well-adjusted.
anon former rider
Question 1 is a big one! I took riding lessons as a kid from various places and there was an enormous difference between the most careful riding programs and the least. I loved riding, but am thankful that my kids aren’t interested because of safety (as well as cost/hassle factor). If they were, I’d only send my kid to a more cautious program where students are expected to learn fundamentals very well before progressing to the next level and the program generally followed best practices to limit the chances of a life-altering accident.
Anon
Yeah I’m not OP but am grappling with #1 after my daughter and I went horseback riding on vacation and she fell in love and wants riding lessons. Apparently it’s more concussion-prone than football, which I would never in a million years let my kids do.
Anon
I read somewhere that vaulting is the safest equine sport (and it’s terrifying to me!).
Anon
Of course you want to get a camp that is good on basic safety, but all the best activities in life involve some risk. The kids should be allowed to jump, canter, and do other risky activities as long as their skill level supports it.
Anon
Doesn’t it matter how invested the individual is? To one person, it may be one of the best activities in life. Others may be mostly curious and think it’s just okay. How much risk is worth taking on if you don’t like something much to begin with?
I’m willing to take zero risks when it comes to motorcycles, for instance, but I also hate machinery, loud noises, the open road, and the smell of gasoline.
Anon
How can the daughter ever know if she’s invested if she doesn’t get to try it even once?
Anon
I definitely support getting to know some horses! I remember fun (and risky) riding having to be earned with lots and lots of chores, similar to the Girl Scouts camp mentioned above, which probably did help sort for investment level.
Anon
Nonstarter in our house as a close friend died while out on a very basic trail ride with her children. Fell, hit head, no helmet. At the very least, insist on helmets and vet the safety record of the camp.
Anon
Helmets are definitely mandatory. But even with helmets, it’s still a risky sport.
Anon
My parents paid extra for my sister to take horseback lessons at 4H camp, and now she lives in a dilapidated mess of a house with all her disposable income going to her menagerie of farm animals (including many horses), so it’s a real concern! (Lol, kind of, tongue in cheek)
I do think it sounds fun. Have you put any parameters around her camp choices so far? Like, she can pick X camps or has Y budget to spend on them? Even if you can afford it, it’s wise to begin introducing her to the concepts of time/money budgeting for activities and involving her in the decision making. Maybe horse camp takes the place of three others she really wanted to try.
Anonymous
I look back on my mother saying no to a ski trip for similar reasons and I think it was a hard lesson for me and a good decision for her. It makes me sensitive to Al the conversations among colleagues who assume everyone skis and has been skiing their whole lives and frankly I am glad I am not one of them. But you may want your daughter to have the opposite and have entre to every circle and no sensitivity to ever having to make financial choices, in which case you should let her do it.
Anon
This is a weird take. Skiing is an incredibly popular sport and most people do have to make financial choices in order to afford it.
Anon
Hmm…I think it’s. Good take, and skiing is only really ubiquitous in a bubble.
Seventh Sister
I think it’s good to be sensitive to people not having the same sorts of opportunities, but there are a huge number of price points for skiing, especially if you live within easy driving distance of a ski area. That said, I would feel weird if my kids’ friend wanted to take them to Vail over a break. But probably not weird enough to decline the offer.
Anon
I was a poor kid and skiing was for rich kids. Or richer than us anyway.
Truly poor people don’t generally ski.
Seafinch
I grew up without any money, itt was pretty dire and we skied. It’s the east coast of Canada and not remotely glamorous or especially good conditions but it was cheap. our grandparents and aunts bought the season’s passes as Xmas gifts and we used hand me down equipment from our neighbours. The oldest neighbour was 15 years older than me and the youngest was ten years younger and in the 25 year span 11 kids used the same equipment. One of the younger kids died laughing when he saw an old photo of the older kids using the equipment because he had no idea. We packed peanut butter sandwiches and spent all weekend at the hill, all winter long.
Anon
The average American can’t afford a $400 emergency expense, so I would actually wager that most people would have to make financial sacrifices to afford it.
Seventh Sister
I grew up in a place where horseback riding was something that nearly any middle-class kid could do, and plenty of the poor kids did as well since all you needed was a relative or friend with enough space for a horse. While I took a few years of lessons, I was neutral about the whole horse business. My sister, on the other hand, LOVED the whole thing and even did a few shows. She also leased a horse one summer. My mom was really aggressive about finding the lowest-cost situation and was clear that my sister couldn’t do more than the rinky-dink stable.
Now I live in a HCOL city where only the $$$$$ people do anything with horses. I’ve had more than one person assume I was from some fancy East Coast family because I knew anything about horses or had done lessons. My kids have not been enthusiastic about the horse idea, and I spend stupid amounts of $ on ballet. If they want to try it out, there’s always time.
It was the 80s/90s when we rode, so safety wasn’t a big thing if you weren’t doing steeplechase or some sort of nonsense like that, but I’m far more afraid of drowning/water/swimming mishaps than falling off of horses. They are big dumb animals (sorry horse people) but beginners usually have the most docile horses and the most observant teachers.
Gail the Goldfish
trust me, no horse person is going to dispute they are big dumb animals. *looks sideways at my mare who really has to go out of her way to achieve some of her injuries* (but we love them anyway)
Anon
I just went down the polo vs. polocrosse rabbit hole including the cultural connotations. They honestly both look like a blast.
Anonymous
Ideas for gluten free salty snacks? Of course consuming a lot of nuts and cheese but was thinking more all the lines of packaged snacks like crackers or chips or something. I know potato chips qualify but was wondering if there are others. Vegetarian so the beef stick type of options are out.
Anon
Roasted chickpeas.
anon
Similarly, roasted fava beans. Growing up I would get the roasted salted ceci and fava bean mix from Italian delis.
Anonymous
Cheese crisps.
Anonymous
Popcorn, corn tortilla chips.
Former Junior Associate
seaweed snacks. I like the teriyaki flavored ones from Trader Joe’s.
Anon
Mary’s Gone Crackers Super Seed crackers are soooo good. I eat gluten but choose to eat these. Trader Joe’s also has gluten free seed crackers that are better than the “regular” ones.
Anonymous
I have been eating these this week for the first time and agree. Very good.
Anonymous
I live of these: https://www.traderjoes.com/home/products/pdp/papadums-lentil-and-chickpea-crisps-070198
Anonymous
Popcorn! I personally prefer the making it on the stovetop with kernels and oil.
anon
+1
Tastes better!
Anonymous
Wasabi peas (GF versions)
Anonymous
Cheetos are GF. Or if you want something more healthy, I like carrots and hummus.
anon
salty…
Anonymous
Um, both are salty…?
Anon
Mochi rice nuggets from Trader Joe’s. I’m demolishing a bag as I type this. They’re delicious and addicting.
Anon
Screaming into the void.
And resisting the urge to vaguebook, if you weren’t so nasty on the phone, I might call you more.
Anon
👀
Anon
I see you didn’t resist the urge.
Anon
Youre anon-booking here. Vague booking and everyone looks around for who is causing the problem.
Anon
Ha! I like it! Vaguebook here all you want – since we don’t know you or them, we don’t care :)
Anon
What is vague book?!
Cat
Posting on fb (hence the book part, though it applies to vague stories or whatever too) a vague “omg so sad, you never know who will disappoint you” post that stirs drama. It’s like a thirst trap for questions.
Hunter B. Trial?
I’m a civil attorney, so asking the crim attys or other who are following along more closely on the Hunter B. Trial – why would his attorneys take this to trial instead of having sought some sort of plea deal to reduce these charges to misdemeanors? The details coming out at trial seem to be far worse…
Anonymous
Maybe the prosecution didn’t offer a deal because they think they will win at trial and/or because they want a trial for political reasons.
Anon
Was there a plea deal available? Did Hunter want to accept it, or did he want to take his chances at trial?
Anonymous
He entered into a plea deal that the judge rejected.
Jules
Right, this was kind of a big thing. There was a plea agreement in which he would be sentenced for some tax violation and the gun charges would be dismissed but there was a huge political outcry over “special treatment” – although I’m not a criminal lawyer I think it was pretty standard, actually – and the plea was rejected.
Anon
Wasn’t it also that there was a difference of opinion between the sides as to what was rolled into the plea? Like they seemed to have a fundamental mismatch of expectations, so no real agreement once you scratched he surface of its actual terms.
anon
I’m not a lawyer, but the “questionable” part to me was the added clause that said something like “and you can never charge Hunter for anything else as long as he lives” which would have included any still under investigation tax misdealings.
Anonymous
Yes. The judge scratched a little deeper than she might have following the political outcry, but the deal was flawed in that way and some other nuanced ways and apparently in ways that parties could not later reconcile, particularly given the political climate in which the prosecutor was then working, so no deal.
Kate
I received an absolutely beautiful floral arrangement today at my office. Problem is, I’m leaving tomorrow for 3.5 days (returning Sunday evening). I’m confident it will be alive when I get back but feel guilty “wasting it” while I’m gone. I could leave it in my office and enjoy next week or give it to my assistant to take home and keep (she’s WFH all next week). What would you do?
SC
I’d leave it and enjoy it next week.
Anon
Give it to the assistant.
Anonymous
Assistant, 100%.
Senior Attorney
Assistant
Cat
Assistant
Anon
Another vote for your assistant.
Sam
Orthodontist question.
My 8yo has a missing tooth (and associated missing adult tooth). There is no gap, other milk teeth are slightly shifted and filling in. Our dentist referred us to the orthodontist so we went to 2 consultations and got 2 opinions.
1) Ortho1 says in addition to the missing tooth there is overcrowding (in a different portion of the mouth). Due to the missing tooth and otherwise, other teeth are going out of alignment and need to be adjusted slightly. Also says the prominent gum frenulum connecting her upper lip to upper gums needs to be surgically removed before any of the correction starts. Then an expander will space out the overcrowding and a retainer will retain the extra space until all adult teeth are in. Then we may need to decide whether to do anything else to fix the gaps but likely the missing tooth does not need to be replaced with an artificial tooth.
2) Ortho2 says yes there is a missing tooth but nothing can really be done right now. We wait another 6-9 months and then see how other teeth grow in. Then we can choose to make space and put in a replacement tooth if needed. Taking a more relaxed approach to the whole thing and saying we cannot really start until some developments happen (milk tooth falls out and we see the direction of growth of adult tooth before correcting).
I am usually on the side of low-intervention and generally believe that dentists sometimes go overboard especially in the US. However, I really liked Ortho1 – they seemed detailed, patient and had 2 doctors in the practice look at the xray and her actual teeth. They answered all my questions and showed me pictures of how these interventions would look, and also a research article about the relative outcomes of replacing different missing teeth or not. But the gum surgery under anesthesia, the longterm plan with expanders and retainers are all just phase 1 with potential more dental work down the line – this feels like too much. DH went to ortho2 with the kid so I dont have as full a picture of why their reco is so different.
Should I go back to our original dentist and ask them or revisit with Ortho2 to get more rationale? Should we get a third opinion? Confused.
Anon
area milk teeth the same as baby teeth? and it is confirmed your kid won’t get it in? where in the mouth is the missing tooth? i had 4 adult teeth pulled bc i didnt have enough space for all my teeth, but it was towards the back of my mouth. i know this is time consuming, but i’d either go back with kiddo to #2 yourself, or get a 3rd opinion. If you’d like your dentist I’d also circle back with them. Obviously this is outside of their area of specific expertise, but they can probably opine as to the overcrowding and gum frenulum. As a kid I had to have many teeth extracted and it was always advised by and done by my dentist
SC
I’d ask for the x-rays and records and seek a third opinion if you can do it without taking your daughter to another appointment. I agree that #1 feels like a lot. If a third opinion isn’t feasible, I’d go back to #1 and ask what the risks of waiting 6-12 months are.
Anonymous
This.
Anon
Agree with this. And anecdata – I am missing a tooth in the bottom front and you’d never know. There isn’t room for it and the teeth grew in as if it was not supposed to be there. I did have braces as a kid but for an overbite (different issue).
Loofah
My sister is similar, except hers is on top. It’s still not noticeable. She’s also missing all of her wisdom teeth, so that’s a plus.
For OP – I had gum surgery using local anesthesia. Just a ton of novocaine, no laughing gas or anything. So your daughter might not have to go completely under for the surgery.
anon
I have a small jaw and one tooth came in tilted inwards because if crowding (so it was never going to align correctly to function). It got pulled and no replacement was ever discussed. I have no gap or functionality issue from that missing tooth. You can’t see it, my last dentist didn’t even seem to notice until I mentioned it during the intake exam.
Sam OP
Thanks to those who replied. Yes, milk teeth = baby teeth. I do have the xray (taken by our primary dentist) which shows the missing tooth and the missing adult tooth (other adult teeth show up inside the gumline). The missing one is in the top row next to the canine but from the academic articles it doesn’t seem to impact chewing etc. much. The real interventions in ortho1 relate to other problems like the frenulum and overcrowding in the lower jaw, as well as one thing related to the nearby tooth next to the missing tooth (growing misaligned due to missing neighbor).
Sam OP
Also, Ortho2 did not talk about the other problems until we asked, and even in those cases didn’t seem to think anything needed to be done for another 6-9 months.
Ortho1 did seem to say that it was nice that we caught this early because a lot of people don’t come in until later when there is less opportunity to take corrective action.
Anon
We have the exact same issue but kiddo is 12. Our US trained ortho says she needs braces and the will have a bridge to reserve space for missing tooth (incisor) and will get an implant at 21. Frenum needs removal.