Suit of the Week: Nina Ricci

114 Comments

1. Seriously, so gorgeous.

   I’d like to hear from some of y’all who have decided to have plastic surgery, or some who have considered it and decided against it. I’m thinking of having a nose job. I have the money just sitting there, and I’m thinking of doing it on maternity leave so I wouldn’t have to take time off of work. I just can’t decide if I’m willing to go under the knife for vanity. I would like the way I look so so so much better. This has bothered me for years and years. And I would like the surgeon just to do something subtle, so that people wouldn’t think I look totally different – just a little tweak. But then I can’t imagine people talking about it . . . . if they did figure it out. And if it’s just a little tweak, is it worth going under for?

   Anyway, I would love to hear your thoughts and stories. Help me make a decision, oh wise women.

   1. My cousin had a nose job and she is the last person you would expect — wears no makeup, advanced degrees out the wazoo, into nerdy things, not very into girly-girl things or other things considered traditionally “vain.” She is a very petite woman and just had a nose that overpowered her face. The surgery was a big change, but her nose fits her face so well I forgot what her old nose looked like the second I saw it. I also know someone who had two nose jobs done, each time minor tweaks, but no noticeable difference and still a large overpowering nose. So I say, if it makes you happy and if after careful consideration, it fits your face, go for it — even if it is technically a big change and not a minor tweak.

   2. I have had plastic surgery that was very obvious to those who knew me before (but wouldn’t even register when I meet new people) and I haven’t regretted it for a second. I didn’t really care what everyone thought at the time – I knew I looked better so I was happy. I see nothing wrong with improving an aspect of your appearance that makes you unhappy. There’s a huge difference between fixing a nose that bothers you and completely overhauling your face. Just make sure you get a great doctor!

   3. First baby? I’d just make sure you’ve considered how you’ll feel during mat leave- quite possibly already physically run down, exhausted, and taking care of a baby while recovering from surgery sounds dreadful.

      1. It’s my second baby, so I will have my nanny at home, and we get a very generous maternity leave (four months), so I would try to plan it as late in that as possible given healing time.

   4. After hating my nose for 15 years, I had a nose job. And am so glad I did. My nose was just too big for my face, and now it is much better. I cannot imagine anyone who knows me would guess I had my nose done. Does it seem vain, yes. Do I regret it, no.

      The first surgeon I saw had a very “well, what would you like?” approach. The second one started describing the reasons that he didn’t think my original nose fit my face—and they were exactly the complaints I’d always had. It was too high, too wide, curved at the bottom. I had the second guy do it. I do wish the tip were a little smaller than it is, but not so much that it would be worth it to me to go back in.

      I had mine done on a Thursday and went back to work 10 days later on a Monday). I told people I’d be out for “nasal surgery,” which they all thought sounded painful and no one asked any questions.

      1. That’s so funny. Here in So Cal if you said you were having “nasal surgery,” everybody would totally assume “nose job!”

   5. I did it and am just sorry I waited so long. It took me from feeling like an Ugly Girl to feeling normal. I was EXHAUSTED for a good 4-5 days after but was able to work from home. I went back to work about a week later. Do it.

2. Very Alicia Florrick!

   1. That was my thought too. Speaking of Alicia, is anyone else disappointed in this season of The Good Wife? I loved the season premiere but all the episodes since then have been a disappointment. I’m especially sad that Elsbeth Tascioni’s character has gone from quirky but super competent and effective to bizarrely weird in a way that interferes with her job. I also feel like all the characters are going in different directions this season and with the exception of Alicia, Peter, Eli (and perhaps Finn) it’s hard to give them scenes together that don’t feel forced. I also don’t really like Alicia’s storyline this season. And while I know legal TV shows aren’t necessarily super grounded in reality, I feel like the amount of wildly unrealistic things happening has gone up exponentially this season.

      1. I’ve actually really liked this season so far (except for the episode with Elsbeth). I think it’s been interesting.

         IF you want a wildly unrealistic legal show, check out How To Get Away With Murder. Aside from virtually everything being inaccurate and unrealistic, Viola Davis wears sleeveless dresses (and NEVER a blazer) in court. She’s fabulous but it drives me crazy.

         1. Within the first fifteen minutes of How to Get Away With Murder, I realized how medical professionals must feel watching Grey’s Anatomy.

      2. I decided to stop watching the rest of the season during the last episode. The Elsbeth thing really pissed me off.

3. Seeking advice on a job decision that I’m unexpectedly facing (and apologizing in advance for the novel). I’m currently a senior associate, litigating in a specialized practice area. I really like my firm and my office – it has been very family friendly, casual, good coworkers, etc. Objectively, I’m good at what I do, been told that I’m strongly on partnership track, am a strong writer, good in court, have landed a few clients, etc. My husband is also a professional with a demanding job and we have two kids under three. We live in the suburb of a major city and I commute downtown (20 minutes in the morning, 45 to an hour in the afternoon).

   Despite liking my job, I live with almost-constant stress regarding scheduling, work emergencies, trials…all the typical litigator stuff. One partner that I have several cases with is notoriously horrible to work for and just makes everything ten times more difficult and time consuming than it should be. I’ve started waking up from panic attacks about once a week regarding deadlines, random issues, or issues created by said partner.

   Three weeks ago, I received a call from an in-house acquaintance, and he was creating a position at his company that would be exactly what I do. He wanted to have lunch to discuss, but basically told me that the job was mine if I wanted it. We had lunch last week, and I’ll be officially “interviewing” on Friday, but I’ve again been told that if I want the job, I can have it. I’d be shaping the exact role of this job, but it would be focusing on my specialization and I would have the opportunity to define exactly what I do. The pay is comparable to my current firm job, but the bonus would be much higher, they offer 401K match, etc. Insurance is through my husband’s job. Most importantly, new job is about 1 mile from our house. My friend assures me that he doesn’t work nights and weekends and that he has a predictable office schedule. Two years ago, I seconded for a few months at a large corporation, so I’m fairly familiar with in-house work generally.

   In-house has never really been on my radar – I just assumed I would be at my firm and make partner and work there. But the idea of an office job, with a predictable schedule, is very appealing. But I also can’t shake the feeling that this would be (for want of a better phrase, because I hate it) “leaning out,” as I’ve been successful at the firm. My husband said he’d be happy with whatever decision I made, as long as I was happy with my career. So I guess…what would you do?

   1. Ummm…. I’d take it! In-house with comparable salary and a better location vs. firm job that is lately giving you panic attacks? For me, the answer would be obvious. Congrats on such an amazing opportunity.

   2. I’d take it! I will say that I know lots of in-house lawyers who work much more than 9-5 M-F, so it may not entirely be the “leaning out” you expect.

      1. Oh, agreed. I know a lot of people who thought in-house was a nirvana, but realized it was a pay cut with the same hours. That’s why this sounds so great – if the hours are actually what they say they are.

         1. And if it turns out that you hate it, you can always go back to firm life.

            1. I’ve heard that it can be incredibly hard to go back. I’m not saying don’t take it because it does sound like an amazing opportunity, but I would definitely not assume that if she doesn’t like it she can easily go back to a firm.

            2. True. I don’t think it would be a piece of cake, but I think since she’s well-regarded at her current firm that they might be interested in having her return. I also think that some firms value a mixture of prior law firm/in-house experience. There’s a litigation partner at my firm who went in-house for a while.

   3. DO IT!! Seriously, what is the down side? I left a firm that I loved where I was very successful and had made partner to go to a government job. I left because of the panic attacks and because I felt the need to be much closer to my little ones. I can’t tell you how happy I am to have made the transition. And, I don’t feel like I was “leaning out” but “leaning in” because I have been able to do amazing things in my new position, such as arguing before appellate and supreme courts. If you have the opportunity to define what you do and to grow within the company, you are not “leaning out” but finding a better fit. Plus, you will benefit from being closer to your kids.

   4. Taking a job that sounds like it is really perfect for you and would make you happy and fulfilled isn’t “leaning out” just because this job is less demanding than another job/not the path you thought you’d take. TAKE IT.

      1. Agree with everyone else that taking this job wouldn’t be “leaning out.” I think Sheryl Sandberg herself talks about the jungle gym of success — this sounds like a great opportunity to advance in a new role.

   5. Err, I don’t think it’s “leaning out” when you kill it so much in your career that you inspire someone who knows you to conform a position to you. That, to me, is the definition of success. If you think you will continue to be professionally challenged in the in-house role and it will improve your well-being in other respects, go for it!

      1. Agreed, i vote to take it!

      2. This is actually the point of the whole “lean in” thing, OP – your investments to date in your career have paid off, in that you’re such a rockstar that you now have amazing options at the time that you want them. Go for it!

   6. I think you should take the in-house job if you’re confident that it will last and will actually conform to the characteristics you’ve described (salary, hours, etc.).

      I mean, what is really holding you back here? If it’s genuine concern that this new job wouldn’t work out (and I’m not getting that sense from your post), then, sure, maybe you shouldn’t take it or should think it over more. If it’s not satisfying some mystical benchmark that’s been set by someone else, then that’s not a reason to stay at your current job. You need to do what’s best for you and for your family. There is no award or bonus for “most panic attacks at night resulting from stressful work” or “most unnecessary suffering due to working for an irritating boss.”

      Not to mention the fact that you’ve basically described most attorneys’ dream job with this in house gig.

      1. I think you just exactly described what was holding me back: a mystical benchmark set by someone else. I just assumed that because I’m apparently good at my job, I need to stay and make partner. I have dear, good friends that I’ve made at my current firm, but I’m realizing that’s not enough to stay and be stressed.

         1. I suspect you will retain those dear, good friends. If they are fellow lawyers, they will want to maintain the relationship for both personal and professional reasons, which means they may make more effort. If they are staff members, you will (it seems) have more flexibility to meet outside of work time. And everyone likes to socialize with people who understand the inner workings of their workplace but no longer work there, because it can be cathartic to get that perspective.

            1. Not only will you retain them (my best friends are still from my firm that I left 10 years ago to go in-house) but most of them will move on to other roles and that fun/friend filled firm won’t exist anymore.

      2. This x1000. I stayed and made partner, thinking that would be the magical panacea that would fix everything that was wrong and would validate all of my sacrifices. It didn’t. And it took me several more years to realize that reaching the mystical benchmark made for a nice tagline when meeting new people, gave my parents something to brag about, but did virtually nothing for me or my quality of life. Went in house less than 6 months ago and it has radically altered my perception. I had been at 3 firms – all of which had monthly 200 hour requirements – and had come to accept that as reality. It’s amazing how I can still kick a$$ at my job, be valued and recognized as a top performer, but work a regular schedule with virtually no weekend work.

         1. And also? Being a junior partner is about a million times more stressful than being a senior associate. And no more secure, honestly, in most firms.

            Take the job! Take the job!!

            1. Amen!

   7. Everything about the new job opportunity sounds literally about as good as it gets. On the leaning out point, I hear you since I went from a big firm (with reasonable prospects of partnership if I had been willing to put in the hours required) to an in-house position, but it has been such a positive change. It may help to really look at the partners at your firm and think about whether that is something that you want just because it is the obvious next step (and a visible mark of success) or whether they really have lives/practices that you would want to have some day. Also, remember that there are advancement opportunities in-house as well. Although the timeline is generally longer than law firm partnership, you can always shoot for becoming a general counsel, which is certainly a lean-in position and would give you another goal to work towards.

   8. ill be the lone voice of dissention. I’ve considered this many, many times for all of the reasons you point out. What always keeps me at a law firm is litigation. Except in rare circumstances (this may be one of them), when you are in house, you really are no longer a litigator. you may manage litigation, attend depositions, etc, but you don’t get to do all of the fun litigation stuff any more. All that fun stuff is what inevitably causes stress, but its also what I love about being a litigator.

      1. I think I agree with this OP! So I think that mabye you should think twice, b/c peeople in house are not as driven as us REAL litiegator’s, as we are often called upon to save the day from their mess-up’s. I think that if you go in house, you will wind up relying so much on peeople like me (and other real litiegator’s) that if you EVER want to go back, peeople will look at you and think that you probabley have given up doeing any heavy lifteing and would NOT realy be a great asset after haveing sat on your tuchus watching us REAL litiegator’s do the work.

         As a seasoned litiegator, I do want to go in house, b/c I want to have a baby and not do that much work, but the job would have to be cushy. The last thing I want is to go in house and work alot of hours and get lousy pay, and no bonuses. At least on my job, the more I bill, the more I make, so I have learned to be VERY efficeint, sometime’s billing 3 or 4 cleint’s for the exact same work, and only changeing a few names and date’s here and there. But this is a job that onley I can do. I dare NOT trust Lynn to do this b/c she would mess up the names and date’s with Mason breatheing down her neck (and elsewhere–FOOEY!) at the same time.

         So in your case, go if you KNOW it’s a 1 way street, but think twice if you ever think you can get back into the real world of litiegation. I know that when I go into court, it is ME that is up there, with the inhouse peeople like Jim just sitteing in the spectator seat’s, as my judge’s do NOT even like the inhouse guy’s to be seated with the real litiegator’s, since they are NEVER allowed to speak up unless they are admitted to the court at hand.

         The manageing partner told us that he has a place on 3rd Avenue that may be for us. I am to go see it with him tomorrow. It is 2nd Floor, so there is no view, but he say’s the building is only 25 year’s old so that would be a big improvement for us. I hope so b/c I am tired of takeing splinter’s and other stuff out of my tuchus from these old chair’s. FOOEY!!!!!

      2. Just plain wrong

   9. I am in your boat, sister. I could have written this. I don’t know what to tell you, except that if you stick it through and make partner these opportunities will come all the time. And if you stick it through and make partner, the horrible panic will to some degree subside (but be replaced by a new kind of panic about the stuff that worries partners).

      How close are you to making it? Are you firmly up at the end of this year? Next year? If I were you, I would get some clarity from my firm, get the in-house offer, use the offer to negotiate with your firm, and see what happens. For example, you could get the offer and say you are leaving Jan 1 unless you are elected to partner by then.

   10. A few more thoughts:

       1. The salary may be comparable now, but it certainly won’t be comparable if you make partner.

       2. Would you be an equity partner?

       3. going back to firm life will be much easier if you already made partner when you left a firm.

       1. I would think about:

          1. Can you stick it out to make partner so that you will be able to have that credential? Among other things, it would make it easier to go back. But it also gives you a lot of credibility in other arenas. If it’s not too onerous to last that long.

          2. Could you take a leave from your firm for the first X months, until you know it will stick?

   11. In-house here & I’ve never considered myself to be leaning out at all. What I have is a relatively predictable schedule, interesting work, way more opportunity for advancement either on the legal or business side, which is essentially the opportunity to have 2 different types of careers rather than 1. Money is also better – compensation at firms is just cash. In-house there are stock options, grants, bonuses, better health care, etc. All that said, it takes a different personality to be good at it than is typically successful at a firm. You have to be able to make a decision & give an answer and not constantly equivocate. It’s a lot more practical and a lot less theoretical.

   12. Take it! From a litigator of 30 years and a partner in a very lucrative, successful firm, I am counting the days (almost literally) until I can retire. While the job can be rewarding, there is just too much unpredictability, too many late to all-nighters, even after 30 years. Even after you make partner, there are still panic attacks. I see no drawbacks to this offer. Living a mile from home is huge. I do, and I love that part of my work.

       I do think that jobs that are “it can be what you make it” may lead to more opportunity for one side or the other to have expectations unmet. Be sure that the company really wants the position and try to pin down their expectations. Best wishes!

   13. I’m really not clear how taking a job in exactly the area you want, with better overall comp package and improved commute, would in any way be “leaning out”, other than from the “anything other than partner at BigLaw is failure” perspective. I think the real questions that you should seek answers to during the interview process is how you like the colleagues, office culture, and all the other “soft” things that are good for you in your current role, and that you have the right understanding of what “dream job” is all about, including the longer term comp implications.

4. Anyone have any restaurant suggestions for dinner in Tampa? Something not too pricey. And I’m in town for work and the only clothes I brought are super casual or business casual, so preferably something that will work with super casual:-)

   1. Love the Columbia in Ybor City. The fresh Cuban bread is awesome and the 1905 salad and black bean soup are great. If you decide to spend money, Bern’s is the best place in Tampa. And I’m fairly certain that you could wear jeans in almost any restaurant in town.

      1. Co-sign all of this. I think the only hard-and-fast dress code rule for Tampa restaurants is that you have to be wearing shoes (and even then, if you’re at the beach, you can waive this one). Tampa is beyond casual.

         Ceviche (Tapas) on Bayshore is also good.

   2. Samurai Blue or Soho Sushi for sushi
      Datz for casual American
      The Refinery for farm-to-table cuisine

5. This suit is a little much for me, in many ways. Even though I work in a casual environment, it is a little avant garde for me. The zipper is very distracting. I think it would have been a much more refined piece if it used the tiny, fabric-colored zippers instead of something silver & clunky. Maybe it makes it feel more like outerwear to me? I don’t know. The peplum is growing on me, the more I look at it, though.

   But on the plus side, the whole suit is only $3000! Also, at least you can get free shipping on the blazer with the $10k pricetag. I mean, really.

   1. The moment I saw it, I realized that this was what peplums try but fail to do. I am head over heels for this suit! Alas.

   2. I seriously love this. Sometimes I wish I needed to wear a suit ever.

6. Shopping help needed if you are in the mood to help: I need a basic (no collar) shirt to wear under a black blazer for professional photos. I’m fair skinned with light brown/dark blonde hair so I’m thinking a bright-ish color like aqua would be good but I’m open on that. Prefer to buy online at Nordstrom for the free shipping and points…. Any suggestions appreciated!

   1. If you can help it – go gray/navy jacket rather than black for a photo with your fair skin. I’m similar coloring, and i did a lighter gray jacket with a navy silk shell.

   2. Go to the Nordstrom website and click on blouses. Scroll until you find one you like. Click on it. If you like it up close, add it to your shopping cart.

   3. I have similar coloring to you and I did a coral blouse and navy jacket for my professional head shot. It turned out great.

      1. Ooh, that’s interesting. Sounds pretty!

7. Love this suit.

   Now a question. I have a big birthday coming up….my 40th! I feel good about it but pretty much forgot about it until about 2 weeks ago. Anyway, I’ve decided I’d like to give myself a special birthday present to mark this milestone. I’ve never bought myself a real milestone gift before so want this to be something special that I will really treasure and remember.

   I love travel so would normally take myself on a trip, but with a baby, and having recently returned to work, that is a bit difficult right now. But I am thinking of other options….some sort of jewellery, perhaps? A really nice handbag? Some sort of experience? Budget is about $1000. For those of you who have bought yourself a special milestone birthday gift, what did you do?

   1. Do you have a nice watch? Pearls? Either would fit in that budget. I think jewelry is always a good milestone gift. If you aren’t a necklace person, a nice pair of earrings would be nice. You could get a pair of nice size Tahitian pearl earrings that would go with everything and are so flattering.

      1. I was also thinking pearls. I would aim for something that you could hand down to next generation down the road, something heirloom quality and timeless style. Pearl necklace fits perfectly. I’m not a watch person, but that would too.

         That said, I bought a serger :) No regrets. I love that thing.

      2. Totally agree that jewelry is my go-to milestone gift to myself. Do you have a right hand ring? I wear a simple gold and silver David Yurman on my right hand that I love and bought for myself when I turned 30. To me, the key is to find a piece that you love and would want to wear frequently, if not daily. For some people, it’s something simple. For others, it may be more of a statement piece.

         1. + 1 This is what I’d get.

   2. I am not really into jewelry or handbags but if you are, of course there are many lovely options the ladies on this site are much more knowledgeable about. For me, maybe a piece of furniture – like an antique hutch or desk (I’m furniture shopping lately so that’s on my radar) or doing something in your home like a cool new light fixture. Getting super great seats to a concert or sporting event is also a great experience if you are typically a nosebleed seat person.

8. I know there have been discussions about these appliances before, but to my knowledge not this specific question.

   Would you rather have:

   Vitamix blender
   OR
   KitchenAid stand mixer AND Magic Bullet (Nutrabullet Pro) blender

   We have none of them currently and do a lot of cooking, some baking, and make a fair amount of smoothies. Husband would like to start making ‘green juice’ and our current blender can’t handle the frozen fruit smoothies that my kids request pretty often, so we started thinking about breaking down and getting a vitamix – but then I realized that we probably would never need to make 64-oz of juice/smoothie and for the same price could get a standing mixer (which we’ve wanted for a long time) if we got the Nutrabullet instead.

   Thoughts from users of these appliances much appreciated!

   1. The latter because I’m obsessed with my KitchenAid stand mixer (and all of it’s glorious attachments) and my Ninja blender is amazing, so I can’t imagine justifying the cost of a Vitamix.

   2. I don’t have much experience with either blender (though I’ve heard really good things about both), but I would die without my Kitchenaid stand mixer. Well, maybe not die, but I would be really, really sad. I’d go blender-free before I’d be without it.

      1. Totally agree. My KitchenAid is the first thing I’d save in a fire, before my wedding dress. I super love it.

   3. We have the Nutrabullet and it works fine for making smoothies, especially if there is not too much ice (we freeze banana and add that plus frozen berries instead of ice.) So I would vote for the mixer and the Nutrabullet.

   4. I don’t have my own KitchenAid yet, but my mother does and it is the most amazing cookery gadget she owns. I covet one of my own someday. :P

   5. I inherited a Vitamix and didn’t really use it so I gave it away. On the other hand, I love and adore my KitchenAid stand mixer and use it for everything under the sun. So Option Two gets my vote!

      1. Hah–I inherited a KitchenAid (it was my grandmother’s!)

   6. I have an old Magic Bullet, and it is fine for smoothies with frozen fruit, a little ice, and spinach. I know that Vitamix is supposed to be amazing, but I feel like since I’ve never tried it I don’t really know what I’m missing, and for the price I’m happy to keep it that way.

   7. I have a kitchen aide stand mixer and a Bamix immersion (stick) blender. The Bamix can make smoothies but be used for so much more.

      1. +1 on the immersion blender. I have a Cuisinart and like it a lot.

   8. I will chime in as a Vitamix fan, since no one else has. It is fantastic for smoothies and juices, but also incredibly useful for making soups, fine-chopped veggies, crumbs, shakes, and nut butters. It is probably good for certain desserts, esp. no-bake desserts, based on recipes I’ve seen, but I can’t testify to that. I don’t think you’d get the same results from a Nutribullet or Ninja (I chose Ninja over bullet for a gift). That said, I cook a lot and never never bake. So I think the calculus is what you really want to do. I think if you are basically looking for baking and juicing implements, go with option number 2. But I would take my Vitamix in a fire right after I saved my dogs and laptop.

      1. I do all of those things very easily in my Ninja – I make extremely smooth soups and smoothies all the time. I think it’s preference/price threshold thing.

   9. Thank you all! This is incredibly helpful!

      I’m definitely getting the stand mixer and now the ninja is back on my list.

9. definitely the stand mixer… they are SO useful and making baking so much easier.

   1. I’d go stand mixer as well. I have a Ninja blender (approx 100 USD) that works great for smoothies, btw.

      1. Good to know about the ninja. It was on my list but got cut because reviews weren’t so hot. I paid a lot for our ‘professional’ blender that struggles with frozen fruit and didn’t want to get another lame duck.

         1. This might be too small if you’re making drinks for a family, but there is a Vitamix personal blender option that is half the cost of the full size ones (and way more space-friendly). It’s the S30 model. You could get that + stand mixer, and still come in under the price of the high-end Vitamix they sell at Sur la Table.

            If the S30+ Kitchen Aid is more than you want to spend, I second the Ninja over a Nutribullet. I absolutely hated the bullet style blenders–unless you are mixing very thin liquid, you will constantly have to open and stir it or pound the whole thing on the counter because smoothies or anything mildly thick will get stuck above the blade.

            1. I want the s30 SO BAD but it’s only like $100 cheaper.

         2. I’d estimate we make 8-10 smoothies per week in ours (which always include frozen bananas, frozen berries, and frozen spinach) and it is still going strong after 2 years.

            1. Love my kitchen aid mixer!!! Get a cool color.

               We make our smoothies in a normal blender– kitchen aid too, nothing too fancy. Works great!

10. Admin question, guys — I am in the very very beginning stages of thinking about a redesign for the blog, and starting to reach out to designers to see what their quotes/timelines are (last time I asked people were booked like 6 months in advance). Which websites and blogs do you LOVE the design of, and think would work well here at Corporette? It doesn’t have to be similar in “vibe” (e.g., color scheme, etc) so much as it has to be an intelligently designed website. Thanks in advance for your thoughts!

    1. Ask A Manager – especially the collapsible comments

       [edited to correct, “collapsible” not “nesting” as we already have nesting here]

       1. +1 on the nesting comments. Make skipping conversations that I’m not interested in so much easier.

       2. Completely agree. That blog also gets a lot of comments and seems to handle them quite well. I’m sure the collapsible comments would be much appreciated around here considering the sometimes frequent snark commenters get for posting about babies, weddings, vacations, etc.

    2. I like “door sixteen” and “manhattan nest” for blog designs. While I understand the desire to embrace the “girly” with the pink and purple color palette, it’s not very sophisticated. If you want to keep it pink and girlie but more grown-up, check out “making it lovely.” She is obsessed with pink and flowers but keeps it from getting too saccharine.

    3. I really like Effortless Anthropologie’s layout. A few reasons:

       -I like how the main page is organized chronologically, but I also have the option to sort and only look at certain categories of posts, e.g. only reviews or only weekly sale posts. I can see where this would be helpful if someone only wants to search for the Suits of the Week without scrolling past everything in between.

       -I like how the comments feature is set up: (a) Log-in available for those who want more permanent IDs, guest commenting still an option for those who don’t. (b) The ability to thumbs up a post instead of needing to post “+1” or “This” (I think those posts are helpful so others know that multiple people agree with or have had the experience described, but lots of +1s is just clutter and I think some people don’t post one because they don’t want to add clutter, even if their backup is helpful information. Seeing that a post has 8 thumbs up is an easier way to display this info). (c) You have the option to sort comments by threads with the most recent activity. I think oftentimes if someone adds a late comment to a thread that is towards the top of the page, the new comment gets lost because people don’t want to re-read everything and wonder “did I read this already?” The sort function lets you just look at the threads with new activity.

       -The search function actually works! I know how to use the google s!te-specific search, but it would be convenient when I’m already here to be able to use the search bar on your page.

       -I know you didn’t ask about color scheme, but even going one minor shade of off-white makes a huge difference in terms of visual appeal. I look at EA and it looks white, but it doesn’t look as harsh as this page does.

       1. Interesting. I never thought of this page as having a lot of pink. It is very subtle.

          Kat, this isn’t redesign specific but I’d like to see a better way for you to handle moderation without lots of legitimate comments getting caught up. Maybe posters that have log-ins with long term ID’s never go to moderation? Putting the word “s ! t e” to moderation catches way too many other words.

          1. We need forums, plain and simple. my tech guy and I are still researching which software will be best for the community’s and my needs, and it gets surprisingly complicated. The best sites running them are running customized solutions which I don’t like. Moving forward with the project requires a lot more hours than I have to give to the project right now, but hope to soon. The forums will all require email verification and usernames.

             Either that or I need to move to Disqus … But I have a number of problems with that (anonymity isn’t allowed, bad for Seo, etc).

             Will look into collapsible comments, nice idea.

             1. For forums, I think healingwell.com does a pretty good job.

             2. not disqus!!!!! ahhh it’s so glitch

             3. Proboards is working very well for one of my online communities.

             4. I might stop reading if there’s forums. My favorite part of this blog is the variety of topics in each post.

             5. Scubaboard has some pretty awesome forums. The search function has gotten way better over the years over there too.

             6. A lot of workplaces block disqus; do you want to lose your daytime commenters?

             7. yet another reason for me to not like disqus. it just seems like that’s what all of the big boys are running. honestly i’m barely looking into third party commenting systems… would rather add forums for additional comments before i leave WP comments behind. but like i said (above, below, not sure now), i’ll talk to the readers before i get too far with the research on forums this go-around. (i’ve spent hours and hours (and hours) looking at forum software since 2011.)

             8. Same here to an on at 7:08. Not looking for forums. I like that it’s a new discussion on different topics every day. Kat, please survey readers before making a big change like that.

             9. Agree with the others…. This blog is not appropriate for forums. Not at all.

             10. Please, no forums!!! I will stop reading!

             11. I hate disqus.

             12. huh – good comments. will definitely check with readers before i spend too much time on a forum project. (not counting the hours and hours (and hours) spent researching, coding, and playing with software i ultimately decided i didn’t like, ha.) i would never change the existing format, but would just add forums to talk about all the other things that people want to talk about. hellobee or youlookfab are always my gold standard. but, like i said, i’ll definitely check with readers before getting too far with it.

    4. A Practical Wedding.

    5. slowtwitch.com – specifically, the forums.

    6. I suppose this falls under design: BIGGER pictures. It shouldn’t be like those blogs where you have to scrooo….lll over the picture to finally get to the text. But something medium size, definitely larger than what you currently display. What I have in mind is those posts that are discussing a particular topic. I know for the posts about clothing picks you may not have control over what kind of pics the online retailer uses.
       There might be dissenting views on this, but I’m someone who likes pics…:)

       Also a note on the pink: I think the site is already a destination for women, so maybe using pink is not really that necessary to convey who the clientele are….

11. What’s the quality of Halogen cashmere like?

    1. A sweater I bought in the 2013 NAS has held up well – much better than J.Crew cashmere.

    2. Surprisingly good for the price. You probably aren’t going to be wearing it in 5 years, but if that’s your price point it’s a good bet.

       It’s thinner weight, which has pros/cons. I don’t live with harsh winters, so I like it.

       I had one pill horribly and so quickly that I returned it after a month or two. Nordstroms naturally took it back easily. Not sure it it was the color run or what, but I considered it an oddity. I have bought others since.

    3. Hit or miss. I ordered the same cashmere sweater last winter in two different colors. One was super soft and gorgeous and the other was rough.

12. Gorgeous. Very gorgeous. Would have to fit perfectly and be tailored just right to get the most out of it, though. Doesn’t work for my budget but it’s pretty.

13. Ok, this is a very weird situation and I need some advice. I just got a formal job offer and I’m ready to put in my notice. I was planning to do this Friday. However, my grandmother died today and I will be on bereavement for a few days. So, what do I do? I’m not really thinking straight because of emotions, how will that impact this process? I’m sorry, this is probably a stupid question but I could use some input. Thank you.

    1. Not a stupid question! I’ve delayed new jobs for silly reasons like pre-planned beach vacations and it’s always been fine. And I’ve had to take off work for funerals and it’s been fine. It will delay everything what, a week? Tell the new job you need another week because your grandmother suddenly passed away and tell your old job you have to go to your grandmothers funeral. Both jobs will be there to deal with when you come back. Thoughts, prayers, and congratulations.

       And do you have a friend you can outsource writing those emails to? They write, you send? I think that would help you out.

       1. Thank you. That’s what I was thinking of doing. I can tell the new job I need another week without leaving my current job high and dry. Above all I want to be an adult, but this is my grandma we’re talking about. Lots of feelings.

          1. Giving factual information in a timely manner to explain behavior is totally adult.

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