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Updated: Feb 11, 2022 386 Comments · by

Frugal Friday’s Workwear Report: Swiss-Dot Mock-Neck Tunic

The Personal Shopper (TPS) | ·

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A woman wearing a long-sleeve ivory Swiss dot top and jeans (head and lower legs cropped out)

Our daily workwear reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices.

I can never have enough basic white/ivory blouses in my closet, and I particularly love something with a bit of texture to liven things up. This tunic top from Daniel Rainn is long enough that you could wear it untucked with a skinny pant, but not so long that you couldn’t tuck it into a skirt or a pair of trousers.

I would wear this with a sweater blazer, slim-fitting pants, and loafers for a casual day in the office.

The top is $32.97 at Nordstrom Rack and comes in sizes 1X–3X.

This top from GibsonLook is an option in straight sizes; it's $69 at Nordstrom and comes in XXS–XXL.

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Sales of note for 9.10.24

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About Elizabeth

Elizabeth is a 30-something lawyer living on the East Coast. She spent seven years as a Biglaw associate in NYC, three years as a partner at a medium-sized firm, and is now in-house counsel for a large company. She loves Diet Coke, '90s sitcoms, and dresses with pockets.

Comments

  1. Anon

    This is gorgeous, but stains travel from out of town to land on my light-colored tops. I’ll eat something innocous and touch nothing all day, yet still come home with an oil spot somehow. If y’all regularly wear white and ivory, tell me your secrets!

    • London (formerly NY) CPA

      Same. Yesterday I didnt think about ordering pasta at lunch while wearing a white shirt until I was about to eat it. Decided to eat it anyways. Made it to the 2nd to last piece of pasta before the inevitable stain arrived. Sigh…

      • pugsnbourbon

        I’m so glad I’m not alone in this. Everything I own eventually becomes “clothes to paint in.”

      • Anon

        Yes to OxyClean. And if OxyClean can’t do it, for greasy stains, mint oil (smells disgusting, but has been quite effective!)

      • Coach Laura

        Oxiclean for organic. It’s my miracle.

        For oily stains, try De-solv-it, which is a citrus oil that is magic on oil and also on some things like ink. You can get it in hardware stores or places like Target or from amazon.

    • Panda Bear

      +1 to OxyClean, and… shamelessly wearing an adult bib! Well, really its usually a napkin tucked into the collar, or wrapping up in a ratty scarf used expressly for stain avoidance.

    • Anon

      I wear a sweatshirt or jacket when I’m eating and if I do spill anything I immediately rinse it off. Like, immediately. I’ll run to the bathroom to rinse something off in the sink. I was the messiest child, so my current cleanliness does not come naturally, but through lots of experience.

    • RR

      Fels Naptha. I have yet to meet a stain that stuff can’t get out. I’m not even clear what exactly it is because I choose to believe it’s laundry witchcraft. Wet the spot, rub the bar on it, wash, view the magic.

  3. Anonymous

    Do you believe the rule of five – that you are most similar to the five people closest to you? If yes, have your five closest people changed as you change, or have you kept pretty much the same circle over life?

    • Anon

      Definitely not, I would say I’m most different from the five people closest to me, but find I’m often similar to their spouses/other close friends.

      • Anonymous

        I find some of the 5 people closest to me are similar to each other but not similar to me.

        • Lise

          I’ve noticed this too. My husband is so similar to my best friend that it’s uncanny – and her husband is similar to me.

      • Anon

        I’ve noticed this too. I guess it makes sense on some level that people who like me also like people who are like me?

    • Anon

      I think yes, you are the sum of the 5 people you see the most. If your social circle thinks X is normal and for example, goes on luxury vacations every year, order take out three times a week, drives luxury vehicles, etc, that becomes your normal and likely forms your expectations. On the other hand, if everyone you know lives paycheck to paycheck, stays local for mini vacations, eats out once a month, etc, then that becomes your norm. Same goes with political views, covid behavior etc. This may not always be the case but in my experience, it is and they shape your perspective.

    • Anon

      That statement was made by a self-branded “motivational speaker.” Not by a social scientist or researcher. That should tell you most of what you need to know about that theory. To my knowledge there is no research or study behind the statement, it’s just something some guy said. There are enough people out there (like Daniel Pink) doing actual research into human relationships, networks, and motivation whom I can listen to if I want information that’s based on facts.

    • Formerly DC

      I haven’t heard this theory, but I think this is true for me. Two of those people are my parents to whom I’ve very close and who I am very much alike (if you mix them together, getting me is the logical conclusion). My two closest friends think very similarly to how I think, although their lives are quite different than mine (one is a SAHM who is much wealthier than I am and one is a highly accomplished executive who travels extensively, is an extrovert with ten million friends while I am a government lawyer who hates travel and is an introvert). My husband is probably the one I am least similar to. But, if I look at them all as a group, we all enjoy discussions about ideas and different perspective, we are all good listeners, we all read a lot, and all of us live very low drama lives, and those types of characteristics are what make us all similar.

    • AnonWithGlee

      Press ons! The drugstore ones are a great way to try it, paricularly the glamnetics brand. But I have long nail beds and I order custom from etsy or online stores. That way they aren’t too long or too loud for me.

  4. Anonymous

    I have the short sleeve version of this in the blush color and it’s been a great and surprisingly indestructible layering piece.

  5. Nail Maintenance Q

    What is everyone doing for nails? I love gel/dip because it is so durable, lasts a few weeks, I won’t pick my cuticles and it looks great, but I have a hard time committing to getting them done every 2-3 weeks. Then, If I don’t get them done regularly when they come off my nails are a wreck for weeks on end, so then I think I should just stick with a regular manicure. But that is not durable and lasts only about a week. I have tried keeping up with this at home but I don’t do a good job on my cuticles. Anyone have any suggestions? I feel like maybe I should just suck it up and get the gel/dip on a regular basis.

    • In-House in Houston

      Following! My nails are a mess! It’s all I can do to put clear polish on them and when I do, I don’t do anything else for weeks!

    • Anonymous

      I use the Essie at home “gel” polish in the twisted looking bottle. It goes on and comes off like regular polish but lasts about 8 days in my experience. Salons have it our you can bring your own.

      • Anon

        The first time I used this it lasted forever and looked great. So I bought a bunch more colors. But I can’t seem to re-create whatever I did the first time because now it’s just as bad as regular polish.

    • Anonymous

      I’m big into nails, but destroy them immediately (because I’m a bull in a china shop and my hobbies and job are both not conducive to keeping things nice). For reference, a regular manicure lasts me less than a day, an at-home gel lasts me 5-7 days, and a salon gel lasts me 7-10 days.

      I do gel nails at home – I bought a light, a few colors, and base/top coats on Amazon for abut $40, which is about the cost of a gel manicure at a salon in my area. It takes me 10 minutes to do them and while there was a learning curve, I got pretty good pretty quickly. When they’re ready to come off, I just peel them off (the horror!). Every few weeks, I take a week off of doing gels and do a clear coat of nail strengthening polish from Sally Hanson to help revive the nails.

      I pretty much just clip, file, and paint my nails; I don’t do cuticle care or anything at home but I know there are kits to do so.

      I almost never, ever get manicures done professionally anymore, even for big events. I still get regular pedicures (every 6-10 weeks in the winter, every 2-3 weeks in the summer), partially because I need help taking care of my heels and partially because the massages, etc. feel so good.

    • Anon

      I hate gel nails. They just ruin your real nails. I keep my nails buffed and short and don’t even paint them except for special occasions. Colors are for my feet, which I turn over to the pros. I buy the glitter-confetti-colors I use to have at home for touchups and never do anything on them but non=gel paint.

      • anne-on

        This. I got them done religiously in my 20’s (and I was in NYC so nail salons everywhere). Now I’m harder on my nails and I got tired of worrying that they looked gross or thinking about when I would have time to get them done. I just clip them short, file, and buff them. If I’m feeling extra fancy I’ll use the Dior NailGlow I have but that’s about it and it makes things SO much easier. I admire the long, colorful gels on other people but it’s just not compatible with my stage of life.

      • Anon

        I didn’t realize how much they were destroying my nails until the pandemic hit, the mail shop shut down, and I had to grow out my nails. It was night and day, the new growth be the old extremely thin nails that had been under gel.

    • anon

      I hate gel nail polish, and every time I’ve done it, it has wrecked my nails. I would rather give myself a manicure at home and deal with the fact that it’ll last 6-7 days, tops. I pick long-wear polishes, which helps somewhat. I have not found much use for salon manicures, other than the rare occasion I need help with my cuticles. I try my best to keep them pushed back and could do a much better job with moisturizing them. Salon manicures don’t last any longer than my at-home manis, so I don’t see much point in spending the time and money to get them professionally done. Still like a good pedi, though.

      • Anonymous

        what sorcery do you do that a regular polish mani lasts 6-7 days? I’m not kidding that I don’t get 6 hours out of one without chipping. I use high-quality long-wear polishes, a good base coat, a good top coat, etc. and have no luck!

        • anon

          I honestly think it’s because I keep my nails really short. If they have even a tiny bit of length on them, I’m constantly banging them against something and the polish chips quickly. I’ve also had the best luck when I do really thin coats of polish. And never more than two; three coats is too thick and seems to chip more quickly.

        • Minnie Beebe

          A regular polish manicure lasting 6-7 days sounds pretty good to me– I can never get anything to last that long. However, what helps extend my own manicures to something more than 3-4 days is to always ALWAYS use rubber gloves when washing dishes/cleaning. Obviously it’s not possible to use rubber gloves in the shower or when washing hands. But keeping my nails as dry as possible as much as possible is helpful.

        • anon

          If you are chipping after six hours, you aren’t letting them dry and set long enough. I baby my nails for a half day after painting them and don’t use my hands much. If I have an afternoon of conference calls or reviewing documents, then I know that’s a good day to paint my nails at lunch. I use plain ol’ Essie polish and it lasts 7 – 10 days if I don’t get impatient during that drying period.

        • No Problem

          I’m on day 6 of my regular polish mani and it’s going strong. Sure, the tips of my nails are starting to have tiny chips, but nothing a dab of clear polish won’t stave off for a few more days. A regular mani should easily last a week or more without major chipping.

          How long are you letting your manicures dry before you go do something (literally anything – stick your hand in your purse, tie your shoes, go to the bathroom, get in bed, etc.)? If it’s not at least half an hour, you are going to have smudges or chips. I have taken to doing my nails during boring conference calls when I don’t have to participate. It guarantees that I will let them dry for a solid 45 minutes before touching anything. And I don’t go straight from letting them dry to washing the dishes or lifting weights. I’m sitting at my computer for several more hours afterwards so they are thoroughly dry before I do anything with my hands other than gingerly type on a keyboard. The price of pretty painted nails is having time to do nothing.

        • Anon

          It’s water. If you never immerse your hands in water, your polish will last forever. But I’m the cook and dishes-doer at my house, and a pretty frequent hand washer. My home polish (Zoya with base and top coat) is good for about 3 days max

        • RinBos

          I get 7 days using regular nail polish. I make sure to wipe down my nails with acetone before the base coat to make sure that the base coat adheres. Agree with the comments on giving enough time for the polish to dry.

    • Abby

      Dazzle Dry!! I can do them at home, or some salons offer them, but my favorite part is that the polish comes off with regular nail polish remover. No chipping for 10-14 days.
      I started using this in the summer and will never ever look back.

      • JustmeintheSouth

        Love Dazzle Dry too. My salon added option last year and I have done at home as well. I also get 10 days plus of wear.

      • Anonymous

        Do you know of any stores that sell Dazzle Dry? Just went to their website to try a mini-kit but backed out when I saw the shipping charge. I just don’t think I can bring myself to spend $42 on trying out a new nail polish idea…

        • Abby

          I think the mini-kit is on amazon. I went all in and bought the full sized kit with a polish when I started to get free shipping. They also now have a rewards program directly on the website/there’s a code for $15 off $65 I can share if you’d like! They also frequently have sales..I think when I first bought my order was 20% off.

    • Anonymous

      I think gel and drip are terrible for nails. I usually do bare filed nails, sometimes I do polish myself.

      • Diana Barry

        I use Color Street stickers. I am really hard on my nails and these stay on for 2 weeks/until they grow out. Remove with regular polish remover. My DH also likes them because they don’t stink like regular nail polish! I do use a base coat.

        • Anon

          Oh, this intrigues me. How difficult is it to get them on straight and without wrinkling?

      • RR

        It’s not the gel and dip IMO, but the removal of the gel and dip that are terrible for nails. I actually find both improve my nails because they add strength and get me to leave them alone, but I’m very careful with removal (as opposed to salons).

        • Anon

          The salons also rough up your nail to make sure the gel polish adheres, so it’s at least partly in the application.

          • Anonymous

            I’ve never had a salon do this – if they did I think I’d walk out. I do my own gel at home (with gentle removal). Gel doesn’t damage my nails at all.

    • Anonymous

      How are you going 2-3 weeks between manicures? My nails get overly long by day 6.

    • Anon

      I just started using Green Flash from the brand manicurist. It’s an at home gel system, but it uses LED instead of UV light and the polishes are vegan, largely plant-based etc. I get around 10 days for a sheer color and 7-8 for an opaque color, which is good for me. I’m prone to chips and my nails grow really fast so any more than 10 days and the regrowth is too much for me. It’s also really easy to remove.

    • KS IT Chick

      I used to do acrylic nails, but that ended what I moved in March, 2020. I could get 3 weeks out of fills with gel polish.

      Now, I use OPI nail hardner 3 days each week and keep a manicure set in my desk to trim any rough edges or snags. I also moisturize the heck out of my hands and use a cuticle oil several times each week. Finally, I put a mud mask on my hands once a week at the same time I put it on my face. It helps exfoliate the dry skin.

    • Deedee

      I think a week for a mani is pretty reasonable. I can only get two weeks from a pedi. To be fair, I have no patience for chipping, which I think looks girlish and trashy (sorry! I know that’s rude but how I feel). I tend to do a week with Essie or SH home gels (no UV cure for me, my skin is aging quickly enough!). If you don’t use those already, I highly recommend. Even just a top coat of that over regular lacquer improves my wear time. Always take plenty of time to dry between coats. I do base coat, two light coats of color and always a gel top coat. be sure to “wrap” your tips if aren’t already! Then I’ll take a week with off with bare nails or a simple coat of a strengthening polish.

    • Anon

      I had acrylic nails until March 2020 and then realized I needed to take care of them myself. I have a near lifetime history of biting my nails (which I managed to stop doing when I wore acrylics) and generally having peeling nails that chipped easily. During the pandemic I ordered the manicure set from Olive & June and my nails look fantastic. I watched the videos to learn how to do it, and my manicures regularly last a minimum of 10 days, as long as I re-apply a coat of clear polish the day after my mani. I get compliments on my nails all the time now.

    • Anon

      We’re about to start gardening season here so I am clipping them as short as possible so when I start digging in the dirt, I won’t be constantly scraping dirt out from under my nails. Or get a rose thorn caught under a longish nail when I’m trimming the roses (that hurt).

      That’s it, that’s what I’m doing.

      • Fed

        Our many uses of “garden” here made this an eyepopping comment at first glance. When I stopped laughing I realized, yes, I keep mine short and plain for many reasons, not least of which is gardening-in-the-traditional-sense.

        • Anon

          I know, I know! I tried to do it with just the regular gloves last year and that’s when I got the thorn under my nail. Thanks for the push, I am going to go order the leather gauntlet gloves right now. I’ve gotta get my roses cut back before the end of February.

    • Anonymous

      Best tip that I learned about doing nails at home is to clean my nails with an alcohol wipe or spray prior to painting them. Once I started doing that, my home paint jobs lasted just as long as salon manicures.

      • RR

        This and cuticle care. Glass cuticle pushers are the best–really easy on your nails and get cuticle residue you wouldn’t even know was there.

        And staying away from water for at least an hour before painting.

    • RR

      I do my own nails and bounce between dip (lasts the longest, but I HATE removing it), gel (probably the best all around, but then also the worst all around), regular polish (love ease of removal, but it doesn’t provide the same longevity and durability), and sometimes even “stickers” like Colorstreet or the Ohora gel ones (a pain to put on and keep from catching on hair/etc., but they last quite a while and have great patterns).

      I’ve got Nailboo for dip, Beetles for gel, lots of Olive & June for polish. Home manicures have basically become a hobby during quarantine, and I’ve gotten good enough at them that I prefer to do them myself at this point (although I’m still all about salon pedicures).

      I try really hard to keep something on my nails and take care to make it as lift/chip resistant as possible because if not, I pick the heck out of them.

  6. anon

    I’m renewing my economist subscription but not sure if I want to pay the 20% more for the print version. I do enjoy it on airplanes and other places where it’s less convenient to read on my phone/online. What works for you all/is anyone getting print subscriptions these days?

    • Anonymous

      I like having one or two print magazines on the coffee table so I have something to pick up when I have two minutes of downtime waiting for the washer to finish, the kid to finish eating, etc.

    • Anonymous

      I get a few magazine subscriptions (Time and NatGeo) because when I signed up it was the same price to do both. I never read them… I have great thoughts of a morning on my balcony reading them with a cup of coffee and I’ve never done it.

      I do the Economist + 3 newspapers (NYT, Washington Post, local paper) online only and read them way more.

      If I”m flying, I usually treat myself to a magazine or 3 from Hudson News (usually the Economist/the Atlantic, a fun special edition NatGeo, and/or a fun women’s mag like Self. I really, really, really miss Glamour being in print, that was my favorite!)

      So, if I were you I’d keep the Economist online only and pick up the print edition when you’re flying.

      • Anonymous

        Newsstand prices are so high in comparison with subscription prices that I stopped buying magazines at the airport and just subscribed to a couple of print magazines that I save to read on trips.

      • Cb

        Glamour and Marie Claire. And Lucky, Domino. I miss the golden age of women’s magazines. I think the airport newstand and bookshop is such a treat, although I fly every week so have had to cut myself off. I get a Lego magazine for my kid and 2 books for myself every other week….

      • Anon

        I miss Glamour in print. It’s the only magazine I subscribed to and looked forward to. I haven’t looked at the website once since it went online.

    • anonshmanon

      Not since my teenage days when my parents bought me a subscription to a magazine with a weekly advice column and spared themselves having The Talk with me!

    • Anonymous

      Someone here recommended looking in a library app like Libby for MAGAZINES. I found the Economist there. I borrow it for free on line. Definitely a great recommendation from one of you smart ladies. Thank you!!

      • Pep

        LOL, that was me! Libby has so many choices, like The New Yorker and expensive glossies like Tatler and Vanity Fair

    • anon

      I still get a few print subscriptions because I like having the break from screens and it’s one of my favorite ways to unwind on a Saturday morning. Coffee and a magazine? Yes please.

      • Anon

        Yep. My house is full of paper books, paper magazines (I think I get 8 home/cooking magazines), and paper to-do lists. I love any excuse to get off the screen!

    • Cat

      We continue to splurge on the print version. It’s so nice to take a break from the screen! (We get our other news all digital – it’s our last physical subscription.)

    • Anon

      I still get a print newspaper every day and several magazines. I am trying to spend less time on my phone and it really helps to have something to browse offline when I’m eating or hanging out.

    • Cb

      I used to love getting magazines in the mail. Now, I just like a print New Yorker but they can’t seem to sort international delivery… I hate staring at my phone or ipad though and would much rather read on my kindle or in print.

    • IL

      I get the Economist and the New Yorker in print. I often don’t read them cover-to-cover, but like having one on my nightstand for those mornings I wake up early and want to quietly read in bed. From switching back and forth between print and digital, I find that I read a lot more when I have the physical copies available.

    • Anon

      I read everything on Apple News or the Kindle app, especially now that I like to make the type font bigger. No paper at all.

    • anon

      Lol, this makes me think of that episode of the Good Place where as a form or torture someone is put in a room with a stack of unread Economist magazines (I think? Or is it The New Yorker) and they just keep piling up.

    • Ribena

      Yes, I have the print + online subscription to the New Statesman. Generally it lives on my dinner table all week and I read a couple of articles at a time while I have lunch and dinner. As others have said, it’s nice to get a break from the screen.

    • Anon

      Vanity fair on the iPad. It’s beautiful and I don’t miss the paper version at all.

      VF’s longer articles are great for a flight.

  7. Anon

    Love both of the linked tops but trying to avoid fast fashion and buyer higher quality clothes. Anyone have a lead for a similar look with natural fibers (presumably silk based) rather than polyester?

  8. Anon

    Someone earlier this week mentioned flat-back earrings that can stay in overnight without poking. Any specific recommendations? I tried searching but didn’t find much.

    • TDS

      Comfyearrings.com? Haven’t tried them personally but considering it for some simple studs.

      • Comfy earrings

        I have and like studs from comfyearrings. I wear them 24/7 with no irritation, poking, etc.

    • Anon

      I saw that post. I am not sure what that poster meant by flat back. I use a small, huggie hoop earring where the wire clicks into the back of the hoop with no wire to poke. I wear sterling silver and often leave these in for several months and then remove for a day just to polish.

      • pugsnbourbon

        Flat backs tend to be used more in cartilage piercings – ones that are in all the time. The post either screws or snaps into a back that is closed and flat on one end.

    • Cb

      I found a few on Etsy but it wasn’t clear to me whether they were for lobe piercing or other ear parts of the ear. I want some as I went 18 months without earrings and fixing it was painful.

    • Anon

      Look for “flat back labret” and that will give you what you want. They’re usually used for cartilage or nose piercings, but you can wear them in lobes as well.

      “Regular” earlobe piercings are usually 20 gauge, so make sure you’re getting the correct diameter. Cartilage is usually done with a thicker post, often 16 or 14 gauge.

    • anon

      I bought a pair of flat backed titanium earrings from Lulu’s body jewelry. I need to upgrade, but they’re very comfortable

    • Anon

      Guys, let me introduce you to Indian jewelry and specifically “South Indian” flat backed stud earrings (North Indian style is usually posts). These are the super comfortable flat back earrings that you can wear and never take off. I have been wearing them for years. Typically found in Indian jewelry stores but I’ll post a few links to examples below so you know what it’s like.

    • Anonymous

      Try “Beatti” on Etsy. I have 4 piercings (3 lobe, 1 cartilage) in each ear. I ordered the “20G Tiny Threadless Push Pin Labret Stud • Rose Gold Labret • 1.5mm – 3mm • Tragus stud • Flat Back Earring • Nose Stud” for my lobes with a 5mm “short” bar length and fun ones for my cartilage (18 gauge, 6 mm bar length). My lobes are thin, and Beatti is one of the only stores I found with a 5mm short bar length so it doesn’t stick out behind my ears. I tend to develop allergies to silver and stainless steel, but I’ve been able to wear the “rose gold” studs in all my piercings for over a year with no issues. They ship from Canada and I’ve had no issues with multiple orders over the past year.

      • Comfy earrings

        Late, but in case you happen to check back, Tini Lux does titanium earrings and has a kids line with shorter posts and flat backs.

  9. pugsnbourbon

    What’s something that you’re looking forward to?
    I had a real shit week and am trying to stay positive. I’m looking forward to spring, mainly.

    • Anonymous

      I’ve been in a hybrid grad program for 1.5 years and in March, I finally get to travel to meet my cohort in person!

      • Anonymous

        Also that the program is somewhere warmer and sunnier than where I live, so will very much be looking forward to escaping the cold, gray winter as well.

        • pugsnbourbon

          Oh my gosh, that sounds wonderful! I’m taking classes too (just a certificate, not a degree) and there are a few repeat folks from last semester I was happy to see. I was just so excited to meet new people!

    • emeralds

      Going riding tomorrow. Making some really good dips (spicy honey mustard and this ranch thing that is unbelievably tasty) for the Super Bowl.

    • anon

      Seeing the guy I am dating for the first time in almost a month as he has been out if the country handling a family emergency!

    • Walnut

      I’m pretty sure my daffodils are going to pop up early this year and I’m going to lose my ever loving mind in delight when it happens.

      • pugsnbourbon

        Oh I love daffodils. I get emotional when the first flowers start coming back. I’m not religious so it’s the only miracle I get.

      • Anonymous

        In DC area, ours are popping up this week! And robins abound. So excited, even if it is getting back to very cold this weekend.

      • Anon

        Love my daffs! They’re the only bulb I can keep around here because they’re poisonous; everything else was promptly devoured by wildlife.

        • Anonymous

          I love tulips, but so do voles–after the year they ate all but two of my tulip bulbs, I lined the bottom of my tulip bed in hardware cloth and cover the top of it with more hardware cloth from planting until February to save them from the voles. Excessive but effective if you want to try it.

          • Anon

            late post but highly recommend indoor bulbs. i consider them cheap therapy. esp amaryllis and hyacinths. crocus and snowdrops work too!

    • nuqotw

      Whipping some cream and eating on anything vaguely whipped cream appropriate or straight from a spoon.

    • Anon

      My parents sent me a gift box from their favorite cheese shop in their state. Great cheese, some crackers, spiced pecans and salted caramels from local shops were in the box. Im going to get a bottle of wine, another type of cheese and some other things to fill out a cheese board. Saturday night we’re going to skype, and have a wine & cheese night together.

      Our favorite dinner when we dont want to cook, but want to have that special occassion feeling.

    • Anon

      Going to an art class tomorrow to make a crushed glass mosaic! Followed by a boozy brunch.

    • Cb

      I’m giving a talk tomorrow and it comes with a fancy lunch. I’m a little nervous to how the attendees are going to respond to my age, gender, and accent, but hopefully it’ll be fine. And then I’ll be in town and I’m going to wander through the shops.

    • Is it Friday yet?

      My upcoming vacation – foxhunting in Ireland! Bucket list trip, so excited to go jump huge stone walls and enjoy the beautiful countryside!

      • Horse Crazy

        Potentially dumb question – can you do this without the actual hunting part? It sounds magical, except for the killing…

    • Anon

      I’ve begun brisk walking during lunchtime each day on a local park trail. I turn up the pop music and enjoy my time outdoors, away from the screen, and getting my heartrate up. I keep checking the clock and I’m disappointed it’s not even 11 yet!

    • Anon

      Getting back into running. Work and the winter destroyed my progress. I can’t wait to get back to running every week.

    • Aunt Jamesina

      Planting a wildflower meadow in our yard and planting our vegetable garden this spring! I spent a bunch of time last weekend ordering seeds and scheming. Gives me hope for spring.

        • Aunt Jamesina

          Our yard is almost an acre, and when we bought our house three years ago, there was ZERO landscaping aside from some overgrown yews around the foundation (and mature trees, thankfully). This is our plan to both decrease the insane amount of mowing and make our lawn more environmentally friendly. We’re going to seed around 5% of the yard this year and the plan is expand it bit by bit over the years. I can’t wait!

          • Bonnie Kate

            How are you handling watering? I really want to do a wildflower meadow in a big open area on our property but can’t figure out the watering.

          • Agurk

            Haha do we live in the same house?!?! We are doing a mini orchard underplanted with wildflowers and some perennials where those horrible yew are

          • Aunt Jamesina

            We’re doing a small patch initially with a sprinkler on a timer. We’ll expand the bed a little each year.

    • Anon

      My senior dog had a good vet checkup this morning (16 year old large dog). I stayed late a work every night for the past two weeks and worked all last weekend… and I am finally caught up… so I am looking forward to a weekend of hanging on the couch with my dog, listening to audio books, and knitting a baby blanket. I am a very simple girl.

    • Senior Attorney

      Going to dinner tonight at the home of friends and having cocktail hour while bobbing about in their pool.

    • anon

      Oh fun!

      Short term:
      – Botox for the first time in like 10 yrs (I only did it once) tomorrow
      – Hair color/cut with new stylists next Friday (my old one was not great)

      Long term:
      – Iceland in mid-late March!!

    • Coach Laura

      What a great thread! And so jealous of these – Iceland; high tea with a niece; grad school cohort meeting somewhere warm; and last but not least – daffodils and springtime!

    • Anon

      Hmmm I guess valentines chocolate being 1/2 off on the 15th.

      I’m in the Bay Area and we’ve been having spring like weather. I’m looking forward to a weekend where I can be outside all day, hopefully this weekend.

      I enjoy the super owl ads and sometimes the halftime show, so I might take a peek at that.

    • A.

      Love this thread! I have a five-day stint off work where our office is actually closed so I hopefully won’t walk into a ton of to-dos on Wednesday. I’m as caught up as I can be (realizing that I could always work 24/7) and am looking forward to having the weekend off.

      I’m using that time to tackle my first house project (DIY) in 3 years because I just wrapped up a course of study, and I’m super pumped. Tearing out rods and shelves in my closet to prep for the Elfa installer coming Monday (which is also very exciting!). I love DIY — so satisfying and screen-free.

      In the longer-term, I’m going on a four-day trip with my college besties at the end of the month. We haven’t all been together in I don’t know how long (maybe 5-6 years?) and I might explode into glitter when I see them in one place.

      • Curious

        Omg Elfa installer is SO EXCITING. Please please please report back on the ensuing bliss.

    • Anon

      I finally did a home improvement project that I think will make the place much more comfortable. Looking forward to enjoying a cozy and well-rested weekend.

    • Anon

      Signed up for a Valentines Day archery lesson with my partner. I told him that we can think of it as either a Cupid theme for the holiday or as murder training, hahaha

    • Curious

      Pugs I am sorry about your shit week.
      I am excited because I’m getting a unit of blood, which means I’ll probably feel good enough this weekend to go for walks. And also the baby is weaned from her 3 am bottle and pretty good at self-soothing, so we are ready to go for sleep training, which feels huge! And things are starting to bloom in Seattle. And my friend is still in town tonight so we will have a nice dinner.

  10. FirstCommentAnon

    What are your tips for managing busy work and buying a house? I am a first time homebuyer and want to make sure that I buy the right house but also don’t want to slack of work. Working mainly in the office now. I would appreciate any tips. Should I inform my boss and ask him for more flexible hours?
    Thank you!!

    • Anonymous

      My manager at the law firm was so excited that I’d be handcuffed to the job by homeownership that he’d have given me whatever flexibility I needed. But when I told him “I am buying a house” I meant “I am closing on a house” so it never actually came up.

    • Anon

      No, you don’t need to ask your boss for flexibility at work because you’re buying a house.

    • Anon

      Um, no. Do not tell your boss you need flexible hours because you’re buying a house; you’ll look like you’re being extra.

      Homebuying is a lot of hurry up and wait. There will be flurries of activity and tasks and then periods of no activity. Remember that you are paying your Realtor 3% of the sale price of the house; make them earn their money. There are tons of articles out there about what’s reasonable to expect an Realtor to do. They really need to take the lead on dealing with paperwork and interfacing with the seller’s Realtor on anything that comes up.

      You can see houses on the weekends or in the evenings, but you will possibly need time off to do final walk-throughs and for closing. It shouldn’t be a situation where you’re pulled away from work for substantial periods of time. If it turns into that, consider you are making the process harder than it really needs to be.

    • anonymous

      You can attend showings after work. There will be a lot of paperwork, but you don’t necessarily need to take time off work for that. You may need to take time off for the closing. However when we did the closing for our refinance, the person came to our house in the evening.

    • First time buyer

      I was a first time homebuyer in a hot market last spring. In order to be competitive, you will need to see listings immediately and complete paperwork during work hours. My entire search process was only two weeks, so I was able to manage with lunchtime viewings and one full day of PTO. Flexible hours were helpful to be able to catch up on work outside of 9 – 5.

      • Anonymous

        Agree. Am in a hot market and you need to be able to go to showings during the day. Thursday and Friday are bug days for new listings. I don’t think you need to ask your boss, but it depends on your work situation.

    • No Problem

      You go to showings in the evenings and on weekends. This is par for the course for real estate agents.

      Once you’re engaged with an agent, follow the link they give you to peruse listings in your target area. Discard, like, and favorite. Go see your favorites. Depending on the inventory and pace of turnover in your area, you’ll need to go on that link a few times a week probably. You can do that as a break from work or in the evenings. After the first time you will only have to look at the listings that are new since the last time you looked, so it won’t take long.

      You may need to take a few hours off work for your closing and obviously a day or two for moving, but that’s a long way down the road if you’re just getting started.

    • Anonymous

      I went to showings in the morning before work. I’m a litigator so I often have filings in the evenings, but nothing is really going on before 10 am. A lot of sellers are happy to have people come around 8 am when they’re already off to work.

      • Anon

        This is a great tip. Your realtor can also visit some houses and FaceTime with you so you don’t have to go to as many showings and spend time getting there and back. If you think you’re going to make an offer you’ll want to visit for yourself but this can help in the early part of the process when you’re figuring out what you want.

    • Anon

      I remember being in work meetings across the country, and excusing myself to find an empty cubicle with a landline to conference call my realtor, mortgage broker, and title agent to iron out a last minute kink caused by these three people being bad at communicating with each other. It sucks but you have to work to pay the mortgage, and most of us do it would quitting our jobs. It’s not like having a baby.

  11. Anononon

    Law-firm specific question. Does anyone have experience (firsthand or stories) with the knowledge management attorney roles in big law? A 40hr/week job seems pretty appealing right now, but what would I be in for? Feels like in a downturn this would be the first to go.

    • MND

      I think it varies a lot by department/firm… I’ve know some that are truly valued and some that are considered pretty expendable. While hours may be more predictable & much lower, my impression has always been that if a partner needs something from you after 5 pm urgently, you’re still going to have to respond right away.

    • Anon

      In our firm, this area has grown a lot and is valued. Smart people. Better balance but to the point above, not 9 – 5. To me it seems like really interesting work.

  12. Anonymous

    Looking for recommendations for low glycemic index / high protein breakfasts! I met with a dietician last week who recommended this based on my fasting glucose levels and fitness/nutrition goals. She gave me some ideas (chia pudding, eggs, plain greek yogurt + berries) but figured I’d check here if anyone else has ideas!

    I usually bring breakfast to work and eat there, so something I could prep ahead of time and/or is easily transported would be great!

      • Anon

        I feel like this is an eggs and bacon play if you like delicious food.. A lot of other foods, while ticking some boxes, don’t become delicious until you load up the fat or salt or both. IDK that that is trading up (and yet, if you have to choke things down, eventually you still just stop eating it).

        Oatmeal with whole milk and Splenda? I need a hit of sweetness. And I’d love some brown sugar.

        • Anonymous

          Oddly enough, I’m not a huge bacon person. I guess I could swap that for pork roll (the best breakfast meat!)

          I was doing old fashioned oats + fruit, but the dietician is steering me away from that

          • Anonymous

            I would be skeptical of a dietician who tells you to stop eating oats!

            Do steel-cut oats have a lower glycemic index?

          • Anon

            I know dieticians used to recommend breakfast oatmeal a lot, but as blood glucose testing has become more affordable and widespread, a lot of people have noticed that it raises blood glucose too much for us. So that’s probably why she suggested against it for someone whose fasting glucose is at all a concern.

          • Anonymous

            As a healthy, young person (late 20s half marathoner who eats decently) my fasting glucose is in the mid 90s! It’s genetic – lots of otherwise healthy relatives (who exercise and eat well) are pre diabetic.

            Dietician is trying to drop that to the 70s/80s and the oats cause my glucose to spike and then crash. We also discussed that on days I eat oats for breakfast I’m hungry around 1130 for lunch but on days I have a veggie frittata I’m not ready for lunch til 130.

          • Anon

            Oats (rolled, not instant) are actually a low-gi food! My low-GI cookbook actually recommends them, funnily enough. I usually make what I call an oatmeal sundae, which includes oats, cinnamon, vanilla extract, fruit, some extra thick yogurt, and nuts. I wonder if going light on oats and more yogurt would help balance it for you, if you really like oatmeal in the morning.

    • Anon

      IDK how you get a high-protein breakfast w/o being very Atkins about it. Eggs? Lots of eggs. Meat. I couldn’t do beans at breakfast.

      • Anonymous

        One of my all-time favorite breakfasts was a fish and beans dish at a resort in South America. So good if you can get the notion that only certain foods can be eaten before noon. It’s not how much of the world lives.
        Dinner leftovers make a great breakfast.

    • Anon

      Greek yogurt + seeds is my breakfast every single day, but I do usually put a little honey on it because plain is too plain for me. Overall still a lot less sugar than any kind of flavored yogurt (except Siggi’s. Love Siggi’s.)

      • Anon

        I wanted to love Siggis but I like yogurt that is basically pudding + cultures. It’s calcium at least?

    • Anon

      I like chia pudding. These might be a little harder to bring to work, but I also like tofu scrambles (with lots of veggies) and huevos rancheros (I skip the ranchero sauce and just do salsa from a jar, refried beans from a can, eggs or scrambled tofu, and an optional tortilla and sometimes guacamole). I think tofu scrambles reheat better than eggs, so that might work for bringing to work, potentially with beans if you want to up the protein even more.

      • Curious

        I have also been known to sautee tofu in prebought Indian curry sauce for breakfast. Quite good.

    • Anon

      I did while 30 and needed basically protein only breakfasts so I made a frittata using some sugar free sausage I found (so many have sugar!), a bunch of chard or baby spinach sautéed down, and of course many many eggs. I cut this in wedges and plastic wrapped each. I zapped it in the microwave when I got there.

      Pretty, pretty, pretty good.

      • Curious

        Our Paleo Life has a breakfast frittata that is similar (adds in sweet potato, might not have greens) and is pretty good.

    • Laura

      Not sure if this is low GI, but my standard breakfast is a banana with peanut butter and a hard boiled egg.

      • Curious

        Hard boiled eggs! So good. So underappreciated. Boil water. Add eggs. Keep at rolling boil for 9 minutes. Remove to salt bath. (This is Samin Nosrat’s recipe from Salt Fat Acid Heat.) Peel and top with salt and pepper. Eat with a kiwi or some mango or berries or occasionally a carrot.

        • lifer

          My egg cooker – recommended here – was one of my best purchases. I always have soft/hard boiled eggs (warm are also a wonderful breakfast treat!), and cold ones in the fridge. Easy snack too.

    • Anonymous

      I’d recommend buckwheat as a possible substitute for oats if you need some grains occasionally.

    • Coach Laura

      Egg cups are my go to: I use eggs and egg whites, cheese, roasted zucchini and peppers and spinach. Freeze and then naturally thaw during commute, microwave at office.

      Superhero Muffins are high fiber with oatmeal, almond flour, zucchini, carrots and eggs. Similarly make ahead, freeze and thaw. .
      https://runfasteatslow.com/blogs/news/superhero-muffins

  13. Anon

    I am going to have to talk to my neighbor AGAIN about keeping his dogs outside all night. Last night was the fourth time in 2022 that they’ve killed a skunk in the yard, and the overwhelming scent is so strong it wakes us up and makes us ill. My house is thick with it, and there’s no way to vent it because the outside air is even worse. They did the same thing on Thanksgiving, ruining the meal and making us frantically quit eating and shove the food in the fridge to keep it from soaking up the smell. I thought constant barking was bad enough–turns out I was wrong.

    Ugh, I’m really not looking forward to this. This guy is every terrible dog owner sterotype (needlessly aggressive and quick to take offense, gleefully announces he’s committing insurance fraud by calling his pitbulls “terriers”, etc.) and he’s making me want to move.

    • Anon

      How is this not bothering him? This sounds like it should be a self-solving problem on his part.

      If this were a cartoon, I’d be looking at a big ACME fan thing to blow his way. And possibly an anvil.

        • Anon

          OP here…this is actually a really good point. He’s had it twice that I know of, he’s an antivaxxer with a customer service job.

    • Anonymous

      Call animal control. Why would you talk to him? He’s threatening, aggressive, and does not care that he’s inconveniencing you.

      • pugsnbourbon

        I tend to agree. If you’ve talked to him once and he’s still being an asshole, a second conversation isn’t going to get you anywhere. Call animal control – if it’s cold where you are leaving them outside all night is actionable. And look up nuisance ordinances. I’m really sorry – skunk smell is terrible.

    • Anonymous

      You obviously have a bigger issue with the neighbor but…might you also have a skunk problem? That’s a LOT of skunks! Morbidly, perhaps that’s the end of it because if the dog got the whole group they might be gone?

      • Anon

        OP here: semi-rural area with abundant wildlife. So while zero skunks is my preferred amount, the population is not insane compared to the rest of the food chain here.

        We do grub treatments, which supposedly helps, but we haven’t been able to get other neighbors on board because they ALL have dogs and don’t want to deal with lawn chemicals.

        I do hope you’re right and they’ve been picked off, or at least learned to stay away.

    • Anonymous

      I’m never going to understand why people insist on owning these awful dogs. They’re all nice pit bulls (or “mutts” or “terriers”) until a toddler is mauled. Then it’s the victim’s fault.

      • Anon

        Same. They are not an appropriate breed to have as pets or to even keep near humans.

        • Anon

          This is cray. The main differences between pit bulls and other dogs is that they’re stronger and more energetic and who owns them and why.

      • Anon

        I know this is meant for the prior post, but it seriously made me laugh out loud imagining it was like, a dismissive response to the dog post.
        “Annoying dog? Egg muffins I say!”
        Or maybe a suggestion that making egg muffins would help with the skunk smell? Or maybe egg muffins would be a good peace offering for the dog owning jerk?
        Okay, I’ll stop making myself amused. OP I’m really sorry about the dog situation and don’t mean to make light of it.

    • Anonymous

      I would call animal control. That’s their job. He is clearly not taking good care of the dogs. Also, as a former pit bull owner, I’m sorry he is meeting the stereotype.

    • Anon

      Dog issues aside, living in an area with skunks means you’re going to get skunked once in a while. They get into tights with other wildlife and spray. They get hit by cars. They just spray for fun, maybe. But I’m in a fairly urban area with skunks and no outside dogs at night, and sometimes the smell just all of a sudden wafts up and we have to shut all the windows. And shutting the windows in our old house doesn’t mean we actually keep all the odor out, we just cut down on it.

      We had a pest guy out and he showed us a couple of places where the skunks might have gotten under our fence, so we sealed those up. But no matter, if the skunk does its thing between our neighbors’ house and ours, it’s going to stink as much as if she did it while sitting at my feet.

      There’s some level of inevitability about this.

    • Anon

      Weren’t you the one who set off her car alarm every time the obnoxious neighbor’s dogs barked in the middle of the night? I thought that was genius.

      • Anon

        No, but now I’m thinking she and I ought to compare notes, sounds like I could use the mentoring.

  14. Anon

    I have some $ saved up for decorating my place (assuming you can get rugs, chairs, a couple of couches, side tables at this part of the pandemic). And I’m even OK having a pro do some of this (I am good at picking items, but concerned that I may not size rugs or things for the space they will be in). All of my stuff is older, hand-me-downs, or from a space I had 4 moves ago, so it’s time. But I’m not sure how to find a person to do this. I can’t even describe my style (I think it is very posh / classic, but I am also a magpie and the design instas I follow are Zillowgonewild and cocainedecor on twitter, all of which sounds like a hot mess and gives no guidance). Are there good ways to prepare for this? Or find a person?

    If it matters:
    I live in a 1920s dutch colonial with medium brown wood floors.
    Have some family-made mahogany furniture that I will never part with (and way too many Craigslist mahogany side tables that don’t match but made sense two places ago).
    Large dog that sheds and will be on the sofas always; he doesn’t eat the rugs any more at least.
    I think I want a Comfortable Couch Co. chesterfield-type sofa.
    I am probably very basic b*tch but that will hurt my feelings if you say so.
    I don’t have any coffee tables but maybe I should (if I do, assume everyone will put their feet up on them b/c the people are feral here).

    • Cat

      maybe start somewhere like Ethan Allen for a few new pieces. They have free design help that will make a house call, help narrow down choices for you, etc. Even if you don’t buy everything from them, you could get some ideas for color and scale on other pieces. Like, maybe you buy a couch and side chairs from them, but use their suggestions for accent tables as a springboard and find a similar thing you like elsewhere.

      • Cat

        oh and they are also very good at helping you work with existing pieces that you love IMHO. We use an heirloom chest as our TV table and that wasn’t going anywhere, so the other pieces we chose complement it.

      • Anonymous

        We just redid our entire living room and used Ethan Allen for design and some of the pieces. The designer was very helpful, and also very upfront when she didn’t think they had what we were looking for (for example, we wanted a basic, solid wood coffee table. None of the typical furniture stores seem to make these any more–we ended up finding an amish furniture store. Also told us they didn’t make any overhead light fixtures that worked well for our space (shorter ceilings) and gave us some suggestions of what types of things to look for elsewhere).

    • Anonymous

      No advice but I love (and am a little jealous of!) your family-made furniture! What an amazing heirloom to have. I have my grandmother’s bedroom set from the 1920s (well I have the bureau, the twin bed and rocking chair are at my parents’ house, but I know I’ll have them for my future kids eventually). This bureau is both my favorite piece of furniture (even sentimentality aside, it’s a beautiful well-made piece) and my favorite family heirloom and it will never, ever go anywhere.

      • Anon

        Thanks — as the last child/grandchild to get married, I got the least (shakes fist at the patriarchy). But due to geography, I will likely have a couple of rooms of it coming after my parents downsize / pass (in which case: will replace some items, somewhat regretably this is all in a “midcentury modern meets Stickley” style my dad requested that my great-grandfather make for them).

        • Anonymous

          If it makes you feel better, I’ve never received furniture or anything of value from parents/grandparents.

        • Anon

          My first husband’s grandmother died shortly after we got married and we got basically a whole houseful of furniture that no one else wanted (the really good stuff was picked over before we got to choose, but we were just out of college with basically no furniture and it was great!)

          That furniture left with my ex, as it should have, but I’m pretty sure I miss it more than I ever missed the man.

    • pugsnbourbon

      Check out Dezeen and Clever online magazines. You can also find pretty simple guides for rug sizes, furniture sizes, etc. on different sites.
      I would edit down everything you know you don’t want and then build back up with pieces you love. It’s hard to envision your space when it’s cluttered.

    • Anon

      I tried Modsy on the recommendation of someone here and found it super helpful. Definitely don’t expect anything earth-shattering but getting a 3D rendering of my room and having someone else do a design was great for my needs.

      • Anon

        +1. Modsy was fairly painless. I wanted to keep a few items (I think they give you 3 items 3D-rendered for free) and otherwise had no idea how to redo the space. I also needed it to be kid and dog friendly, but still look like an adult space. The designer came up with a few layouts, and then once I picked one, she gave several options of 3D models of the room. It was invaluable to have someone tell me the right size of couch to get, and how big of a rug. The 3D model proved she was right about where to put the arm chair, because I would have blocked the traffic flow and wondered why it annoyed me.

        You don’t have to buy furniture from them, so I used the dimensions to find similar pieces within my budget. I found a similar lamp from Home Depot, of all places, and a rug from World Market. I swapped some of the artwork for similar feeling pieces from Etsy and a local artist. I did buy the sofa from them, which was a bit pricey (although she found a cheaper version for me when I asked), and it’s still backordered but so were all the alternatives I found on my own. So I can’t speak to that part of the process, but the rest was great.

    • Anon

      Embrace the magpie! You don’t sound basic. A collected look of things you love is almost always better and more interesting than something intentionally designed all at once, in my opinion. That’s anything but basic. I am swooning over the idea of a 1920s Dutch colonial.

      Thoughts to prepare:
      Lots of free resources on sizing rugs/space planning online. I find the Style by Emily Henderson blog has loads of how-tos and design tips that are applicable to any and all styles. For classic style and how-tos/sourcing related to classic style, check out A Glass of Bovino (blog is great and insta is hilarious) and Laurel Bern Interiors (blog).

      Find more instas to follow. Think about what you like when you find a room you like. Make a list. Sit and stare at your space for a very long time. Move around the furniture you already have. Make a list of the words you want a room to evoke (calm, comfort, light, excitement, moody, whatever). Make a list of what you want to be able to do in each room.

      Specific thoughts:

      I have many large dogs. All the large dogs. I switched to a leather couch and it’s been wonderful because the hair brushes right off with my hand.

      Mix woods! It works very well, especially if you have some more modern pieces in a lighter warm wood to balance the more traditional mahogany pieces. Our vintage pieces are in mostly in walnut, our more modern pieces have oak in them, and our stained pieces (like the mantle) are

      For rugs–check out vintage rugs on Etsy. You can find beautiful Turkish, Pakistani, Moroccan, and Afghan rugs for a steal. They are gorgeous and give immediate interest to a room. They also have weathered my dogs and kids very well.

      Good luck! I’m sure it’ll turn out great whether you hire someone or forge ahead solo.

      • Anon

        Oh, ha, forgot to put in the name of the stained pieces. They are more like a darker espresso. Anyway, I think mixed woods can be lovely, was the point.

      • Anon

        OMG Glass of Bovino is excellent! Just realizing that I’m a molding maximalist.

        We have louvered shutters or blinds on most of our windows (allergies), but can you layer curtains over them or is that weird (that is where I need to see examples and can’t think through things)? I like the house a bit so far but sometimes it is a bit cold feeling with so few textiles. Easier to clean with a swiffer though.

      • Anon

        Yes to following more design instagram accounts – go find Emily Henderson and see who else they suggest. Laughing at Zillow gone wild as design inspo – that’s a comedy account!

        • Anon

          It’s not really my spirit animal for design, but tells me I’m pretty firm in my convictions about what I hate. And I am amazed that people don’t stage their bondage rooms better. OTOH, I love that some people refuse to live a vanilla life, even when listing their house.

      • Anon

        Yeah I don’t think you sound basic either. An eclectic mix of inherited furniture and items from your travels through life (even if you just bought it because ooh shiny) is far more authentic and original than just buying a roomful of new furniture that looks like a showroom.

    • Anonymous

      You can do this! I love Dutch colonials -they have gorgeous bones. If it were me I’d do slipcovered upholstery in a lighter shade and just toss them in the washing machine frequently so the pup can snuggle up too. Comfort works makes lovely slipcovers for custom sizes or for pottery barn/ikea ect.

      I’d consider an ottoman as a coffee table if you’re foot up-people. A pretty tray will make it work for snacks in a pinch.

      Hit up Etsy for a jute rug and a slightly smaller vintage wool rug in pretty colors. Layer the former under the latter. (The dog can’t ruin the vintage rug if it’s already distressed, the jute will last a few years and is affordable.) pull some colors from your rug and get some pretty pillows and a throw in those colors.

      Treasure your antiques and don’t worry about them not matching. Matching lamps will make the end tables look balanced. Splurge on these if you can.Consider some more modern lighting/art/sculpture to freshen up your antiques.

      Oh your question was do people do this for a living? Sorry I just loved the question-your house sounds so pretty.

    • Anonymous

      I used modsy. It was cheap. Not perfect but was a good starting point for what I wanted.
      There is an option to keep existing pieces.

    • Anonymous

      I’m hoping you’re going to check back later since I’m way behind. Asking an Ethan Allen consultant for recommendations and size is a great idea. One thing I wish I had done every time I bought something expensive like that was get its dimensions and mock it up with cardboard (or sheets / blankets if it’s a rug) and live with that for a couple days to make sure it’s the right size. Almost everyone buys things that are too big or too small, and it’s an expensive mistake since you cannot return furniture.

  15. Anonymous

    What are your recs for an easy/quick but healthy dinner? Bonus points if its something I could freeze leftovers and re-heat later.

    I usually work until 5 or 6, and then have some plans after work (workout, sports game, happy hour, etc.), so by the time I get home it’s pretty late and I’m hungry (I do eat a protein heavy snack around 4:30 to keep hunger at bay). In an ideal world two things would happen: I”m eating a balanced meal of 1/4 protein (usually meat, but not always), 1/4 grain, and 1/2 vegetables and I would have had a chance to meal-prep this earlier in the week. However, I know I don’t always have a chance to shop/meal prep early in the week, so am trying to be proactive with other ideas.

    I know we love the bagged salad + rotisserie chicken here (I love it too) but am looking for a few other options. I do want to freeze some leftovers, but freezer space is limited because I have roommates. I almost always buy pre-cut veggies, the microwavable pouches of rice, etc. to keep things easy. My go to is a single sheet pan chicken + roasted veggies over rice, which takes no time to prep but takes 30-40 mins to cook, by which time I’ve already chowed down on the Oreos.

    I aim to go food shopping every Sunday or Monday, so I have fresh food for the week but if I’m away for the weekend that doesn’t always happen so am also looking for a few shelf-stable ideas!

    • Anonymous

      edited to add I’m single/childfree so just feeding myself, no food allergies or dietary preferences, and I”m okay eating leftovers for a few days.

      • Cat

        If you can pre-make *just* the protein portion, that goes a long way IMHO. Think doing a big batch of pulled pork, taco meat, burgers, chicken pot pie, etc. These have the benefit of taking up very little freezer space, and then all you have to do is get your sides together at night.

    • Anon

      Simply Organic makes a vegetarian chili mix that is the bomb. I cook an onion, then throw in the mix, 2 cans of beans (I use chili beans for a little more pep) and 2 cans of diced tomatoes. The onion is entirely optional, so you can make a decent dinner out of things in your pantry if you don’t have time to go to the store. It’s the only vegetarian chili mix or recipe I’ve used that nails the texture without meat.

    • Walnut

      Individually packaged frozen salmon filets from Costco – thaws in about ten minutes in a sink of water. Toss in a saute pan with whatever cupboard spices sound good. Toss rice in a rice cooker. Throw a little chicken bouillon the the water on top if you want some bonus flavor. Steam fresh bag of peas in the microwave.

      It all comes together in about 20 minutes and my hands are busy enough that I don’t snack while prepping it. When I’m dishing up dinner, I dish up the leftovers into pyrex for next day lunch/dinner at the same time. I’ve never tried to freeze it, so ymmv there.

      • anon a mouse

        We love these salmon filets as a sheet pan dinner. (Google 5 ingredient sheet pan salmon for ideas). Basically walk in the door, turn oven to 425. Peel and cut potatoes while the oven preheats. We usually use frozen green beans as well, sometimes mushrooms, sometimes carrots, whatever we have on hand. Put salmon packages in warm water to thaw. Mix a spice blend (I am partial to the Italian dressing mix at Penzeys) with a little olive oil and toss the veggies with part of it before sticking them in to roast for 20 minutes. After the veggies are roasted, make room on the pan for the salmon, add the filets and top with remaining spice blend. Broil for 4-5 minutes or until salmon is done.

        It takes about 30-40 minutes from start to finish, but only about half of that is active time. And the leftovers combine well with a hardboiled egg for a great salade nicoise.

    • Minnie Beebe

      I’m vegetarian, so my go-to quickie meal is some cut-up tofu and a bunch of frozen veggies cooked in the microwave with some soy sauce & sesame oil. If I had some microwaveable rice packets on hand I might heat up one of those as well and toss it all together. Or I might make some beans and rice with veggies (again, all microwaved.). Or a quesadilla with tortilla, some cheese, canned beans.

      I rarely spend more than 15-20 min preparing dinner (for myself, my 11 yo son, and DH.). It’s not always the most thrilling meal, but they’re generally healthy and quick.

    • Anon

      If you can’t prep on the weekends, then use beans/chickpeas and quick cook grains to make a grain bowl. You can just dump beans out of a can, mix with raw veggies and or veggies you cook in the microwave in a few minutes. Quinoa or whole wheat couscous only takes 10-15 minutes and you can make enough for the week or to freeze for later. Mix the beans, veggies, and grains with a sauce and some garnishes (herbs, nuts, cheese, olives, pickled onions, etc.) and you’re done. Quality will vary considerably depending on the sauce and garnishes.

    • Anon

      With the cold weather I’ve been making a huge pot of chicken orzo lemon soup every week. Also in the rotation are chicken salad, crockpot Mississippi pot roast, and crockpot carnitas. If I make like two of these at the beginning of the week, I just rotate eating them until they’re gone and it gives me enough variety to get through the week. I especially like the roast and carnitas because you can eat it with rice, or as a taco, or as a sandwich. That helps keep it a little interesting eating the same thing all week.

    • Anon

      We’re in the middle of a kitchen renovation and are trying to really, really streamline things (plus my husband killed the toaster oven and thus limited our options even more). Here are some of my go-tos:

      Goya black bean soup on top of rice and garnished with jack or colby cheese, tortilla chips, salsa, avocado and sour cream. Even dragging out the rice cooker is chore and those packets of microwavable rice in the supermarket are actually pretty good.

      No-Chop Keto Chili, you can use ground beef, turkey, or your favorite “beyond meat” substitute. Google the recipe; comes together in about 10 minutes, put on top of rice, salad, in tortillas, wraps, etc. garnish to your taste. I make double the recipe because it goes fast! Keeps well in the refrigerator and freezes well.

      Tasty bite Indian food packets — microwave in less than a minute, put on rice. Our favorites are madras lentils and punjab eggplant. Depending on your supermarket, they are readily available — here they are sold in Giant Eagle and Kroger. The ingredients are actual food and spices, they have an organic line, and they taste good!

    • Anon

      Pour carton egg whites into a cereal bowl, add cut veg, microwave. Easy, low fat, and nourishing. (Also great if you do have kids, because you make single servings, thus there’s no arguments about which veg are icky.)

      • Aunt Jamesina

        Low fat seems like it would be so much less filling. Egg yolks aren’t bad for you unless you have particular dietary restrictions!

      • Serafina

        I have a rice cooker version of this that is even easier. Put rice and water in my (cheap $12) rice cooker. Add some frozen veggies, crack and egg. Press button. It’s done 20 min later. Top with some soy sauce, sesame oil, and/or chili crisp or other spicy topping from the fridge.

    • Anon

      If you want something very quick (as in 30 minutes is too long, you want it to take 5), hit up Trader Joe’s for things you can microwave or freeze your leftovers to reheat later. If you want to cook something, eggs are quick – make an omelet.

    • Anonymous

      Veg: Prep a refridgerator salad with hardy veg like cauliflower and cabbage – something with a crunch on day 4. budgetbytes has some great ones.
      Protein: boiled eggs, chickpeas or beans from a tin, tuna, cheese, lentil/pea pasta.
      Carb: rice noodles and vermicelli basically needs boiled water poured on them and sit. Cooked rice freezes well in portions. Quick (parboiled) polenta takes 5 minutes.

    • Anon

      Tofu and vegetable curry with the store bought curry paste and a can of coconut milk and brown rice. I’m vegetarian but I’m sure you could sub out something else for the tofu if you’re not into it.

    • Anonymous

      Tilapia coated in panko is cheap, super easy, cooks quickly, and goes with pretty much anything.

    • LadyB

      Sweet potato and black bean tacos- microwave a sweet potato for ~8 mins then scoop out the inside and spread in a tortilla with some canned black beans and guac

      Chicken sausage and veggies on a sheet pan. Toss in the over for 20 mins while you shower, cleanup, etc..

      Pasta salad- make a big batch and you can eat on it for a few days

      Make shredded chicken in the crockpot and use it throughout the week- in a soup, on a salad, in a tortilla, on top of a baked potato

    • Anon

      My favorite quick and fairly healthy pantry dish is the Budget Bytes cauliflower and chickpea masala. It uses canned chickpeas, rice, frozen cauliflower, tomato paste, and either coconut milk or heavy cream – depending on your preference. I always use the coconut milk because it is shelf stable and tastes better. It is very very good, easy, and reheats pretty well. My husband hates cauliflower so I either just leave it out or add a bit of chicken and it still works.

    • Curious

      Enchilada casserole (not quick to throw together, but easy to reheat): layer shredded chicken, black beans, diced red onions, cheese, enchilada sauce, and corn tortillas. I tend to make my own enchilada sauce. Not veggie-forward but mostly whole foods and you can add an avocado or just eat a sliced green pepper or mango with it.

      Lentil pasta is quick and cheap. Make sure to salt the pasta water. Throw in greens (spinach or kale or collards) when you throw in the pasta. Top with tomato sauce from a jar, slivered almonds, and garlic salt or sea salt.

      • Anon

        I also make enchilada casserole and it’s pretty easy to make it with lots of veggies if you want to. I skip the chicken and do cheese, black beans, sauteed onion, canned tomatoes, and some combination of roasted potatoes or sweet potatoes, frozen corn, frozen spinach, broccoli (frozen or leftover roasted), or sauteed peppers. It’s a great for cleaning out the fridge or using frozen veggies because there’s nothing left in the fridge!

  16. Anonymous

    Has anyone researched and purchased a CO2 monitor that is under $100? The one I like is $250 so I’m looking…

    • Anon

      I’ve never not bought whatever they have at the Home Despot. It’s never even a lot of $. Just buy a pack of 9-volt batteries when you do b/c it’s about time to switch all the smoke detector batteries and it’s always good to have a fresh stash.

      And I don’t think you want one; I think you likely need many unless you live somewhere tiny.

      • Curious

        I am sure this is a typo, but I am chuckling at the Home Despot. It definitely tells me to buy things and do projects perhaps beyond my skill…

    • Anon

      Do you mean a CO or CO2 monitor? My house has always just come with basic Kidde CO/smoke detector combos. As for CO2 monitors, if you’re worried about air quality for covid reasons, I wouldn’t bother with one and would just get a HEPA filter. Is there some other reason you want one?

    • blueberries

      I have one that is like $250 and also does particulate monitoring and it’s worth it. It’s super useful for smoke season so I can both see where leaks from outside are coming from when the AQI gets high and gauge when we really need to get fresh air, even if the air outside isn’t great.

      Outside of smoke season, it has helped me realize how much CO2 my range puts out when baking and cooking. An afternoon of baking can lead to sleepiness-inducing CO2 levels.

      • Anon

        Do you also mean CO? I definitely crack a window when the stove or oven are on.

  17. Plastic Surgery after Weight Loss

    Would love to hear from others who have lost a sizeable amount of weight and gotten plastic surgery to tighten things up afterwards. I have lost about 75 lbs over the last few years and am slowly working on the last 20 lbs or so. I’m almost 48, and a lifetime of being heavy and yo-yo dieting has left me with sagging skin. It’s most noticeable to me on my arms and inner thighs but a bit on my stomach too. My arms do not fit my frame at all. I can wear a medium/size 8 in jackets/tops, but regularly have to size up to something like a 12-14 for my arms to fit. I have maintained my current weight loss for a couple of years so I’m fairly certain anything that was going to bounce back would have done so by now. I have done all the things I know to try – lift weights 3-4 x per week, take collagen supplements, etc. I have now officially booked a consultation with a plastic surgeon for next month and I’m trying to figure out what questions I should ask, what I should be prepared for, etc. I think I’m looking at an arm lift, possible thigh lift, and maybe tummy tuck. Wondering about getting this done in phases versus all at once and what recovery time would be. Anyone want to weigh in with their experiences, recommendations?

    • BeenThatGuy

      Congratulations on your weight loss. I’ve been hesitant to respond to this because my situation has been a complicated one. I’ll share my story briefly…I too have yo-yo dieted my whole life. When I say yo-yo, I mean multiple times loosing, and gaining back, 50-100 lbs, more than once. When I was 36ish, I lost 109 pounds through diet and exercise. I maintained the loss for about a year then had plastic surgery. I had a full tummy tuck (new belly button, abs re-tied, lipo etc) and a breast lift with augmentation. The surgery and recovery were horrific. On day 3, I literally begged God to take my life (zero exaggeration). As the weeks went on, it got better and I fully recovered. Fast forward to week 4, I come down with a fever of 104 and a rash on my abdomen. Turns out, I was exposed to someone with a severe Strep A infection. I was septic. I was hospitalized and had 4 emergency surgeries. My abdomen was opened and I was left with 3 open wounds and a wound vac for 6 weeks. My breast implants had to be removed. I received 3 IV antibiotics, every day, for 12 weeks. My body was destroyed. My mine was destroyed. My bank account was empty. And all this was happening as I was a single mother of a 5 year old.

      I’m 45 now. I’ve regained all the weight and am trying to take it off again. Here’s what I tell people when they ask me for advice on plastic surgery: If you’re willing to take a chance that you can loose your life, go for it. I know my story is unique and not the standard. I know plenty of women that have had successful surgeries and I’m so happy for them. But if I could go back and do it again, I would have spent the $30K on the best therapist money could by to work through loving my body; skin and all.

      • lifer

        I am so sorry to hear about your horrific experience. It is a sobering reminder to all of us how life can change in an instant, and that we are all at risk every time we have a procedure.

        I wish you all the best.

      • anon

        BeenThatGuy, I’m sorry you went through that. Thank you for sharing your experience. It’s really helpful for me to to hear a real story of what could go wrong, rather than just statistics.

    • Senior Attorney

      I had weight loss surgery and lost about 60 pounds and was left with what I call “shar pei tummy”. I had a tummy tuck and it was not as bad as BeenThatGuy but believe me when I say it was no walk in the park. I took a month off work and was very happy for every day. I had a seroma which required them to stick a needle in my lower abdomen every day or two for a couple of weeks to drain excess fluid, also my belly button didn’t heal properly and had to be re-done twice and still turned out unusually small. I am happy with the results but as I say, it is not for the faint of heart. And there is no freakin’ way I would do arms, thighs, and tummy all at once.

      One of the best things I did was book a couple of nights in a surgical aftercare facility. They pick you up from the surgery center and take you to their place, which may be a standalone facility or a hotel room they have booked for the purpose, and they have registered nurses to take care of your dressings and medication, and also feed you. Kind of a combination hospital and cruise ship. TOTALLY worth it even though it was expensive. I used this one but there are several in Los Angeles and I’m sure in other big metro areas: https://www.beverlyhillssurgicalaftercare.com/

      Finally, I tell everyone considering cosmetic surgery this: Whatever recovery time your doctor tells you? Double it.

      • Senior Attorney

        Also coming back to say the actual weight loss surgery was laparoscopic and a total walk in the park compared with any cosmetic procedure I’ve had done.

    • Anon

      Menopause/perimenopause will very likely put a spanner in all your planning. I got down to my “ideal” normal-to-me weight five years ago, kept it for almost three, said “Phew! No more weight gain! I’m finally done with all that!”

      Ha ha. I am 30 pounds heavier and it won’t budge. I got rid of all my smaller clothes. I now have clothes in every size from 2 to 14. I can’t keep it all, but I also don’t want to keep buying for whatever size I happen to be right now. It gets expensive, so I just keep the whole range. It kind of sucks.

    • Anonymous

      My sister had weight loss surgery and then had a tummy tuck and breasts done. She’s been incredibly happy with the results. The plastics were more painful than the WLS, but nothing like BeenThatGuy’s experience.

  18. Anonymous

    I just read Hench by Natalie Zina Walschots and loved it. I’m not sure what “genre” it is (I picked it up at an airport) but am interested in reading more like it. We have lots of readers here and I trust you over the River recommendations – any recommendations?

    • TDS

      There was a short lived TV show called Powerless with Vanessa Hudgens that was pretty charming. I suppose they were henchmen to superheroes/villains in a way.

      • An.On.

        Yeah, there’s more tv shows with this kind of premise than books. Both “Watchmen” and “The Boys” have similar ideas about un-super super-heroes, and I believe “The Boys” is based on a comic book, so you might be able to use that as a jumping off point for more recs too.

      • Cat

        I read it on Ask A Manager’s recommendation. I thought it got a little too long and weird for my level of interest in the story… but the concept was fun and different.

    • Anan

      I thought Hench was pretty great too.
      Not about Superheros, but My Sister The Serial Killer had the same kind of twisted sardonic edge. (Ordinary people trying to function with bizarre sh*t going on around them.)
      Magic for Liars might be another one.

  19. Help with gift for colleague in Chicago

    Hello all, I have a colleague in Chicago that is just going through a terrible time with eldercare and unexpected family medical issues. I want to send her some flowers or treats to tell her that I’m thinking of her and her family. Any recommendations from the Chicago area for florists/chocolate/treats that I haven’t thought about? TIA!

  20. Betsy

    Ok, this feels like a silly question, but if you have a side salad with dinner every night, how are you doing it? Is it just leafy greens and dressing or does it have other things in it? Do you prep a big bowl of greens at the beginning of the week or is this something you put together daily? Growing up we always had a veggie with dinner but never salad. I think I want to become a daily salad person but I am weirdly struggling with how to make that happen!

    • anonshmanon

      I don’t do salad every night, but having the components ready makes it easier. Limit the number of ingredients, too. Leafy greens, one other fresh vegetable, one canned, protein (or leave this out if you serve dinner with salad), seed topping, dressing, done.
      I store washed salad in the salad spinner. Jar full of dressing. Grab a spoon of corn or chickpeas from a can in the fridge. Marinated tofu sitting in the fridge, fry up a few pieces while chopping one other vegetable. Add a few bits of pumpkin seeds or walnuts, they sit ready to grab in my kitchen. I just tried the vegan feta substitute from Trader Joe’s yesterday, it works well on salad.

      • Anon

        Just going to add an additional vegan cheese review here, in the spirit of encouraging people to try vegan options. I really didn’t like the TJ’s vegan feta. I almost never throw away food, but I had to toss both this and the new TJ’s vegan cream cheese mostly uneaten. I’ve decided there’s something about the smell and mouthfeel of the coconut oil cheeses that’s just really off-putting to me and I should probably stop trying them. But I really like the other vegan cream cheese at Trader Joe’s, which is mostly cashew based, and I like a lot of cashew cheeses I make at home (America’s Test Kitchen Plant Based Cookbook has really good recipes for ricotta and parmesan substitutes, but I’m sure you can easily find others online- ricotta is basically just soaked cashews, a little olive oil and optionally salt and nutritional yeast). I’m glad all these options exist, since people’s tastes differ and people with nut allergies obviously can’t eat nut cheeses.

        As for salad, I never seem to succeed in making an interesting salad that doesn’t end up so big that it’s not basically my entire meal, so the side salad concept has never really worked for me. I just eat a salad as a meal a few days a week and leave it at that, but following this thread to see if anything makes sense…

        • anonshmanon

          follow up – are there two different vegan cream cheeses at TJ’s? I just tried the coconut based one, and while I don’t mind the whiff of coco, the texture is just waaay to firm. It tears the bagel apart when I try to spread it.
          Is there another one? Have to look for that then.

          • Anon

            I guess this might vary from store to store, but at least at mine, they also carry the Miyoko’s brand of fish-free lox flavored vegan cream cheese (it uses seaweed). They also make a plain version that I’m not a big fan of because it has a slightly funny flavor, but the seaweed masks that nicely. It’s more expensive than the TJ’s version, but much more spreadable (just a little firmer than regular cream cheese). I don’t eat a lot of fake meat or cheese, but a little bit here or there is sometimes really good (mostly cheese- the only fake meat I eat is the the TJ’s soy chorizo, which is great with potatoes, onions, and peppers, if the breakfast poster still wants ideas and potatoes aren’t too high glycemic index- I bet you could add or swap in chickpeas as well).

      • Seafinch

        I guess this might vary from store to store, but at least at mine, they also carry the Miyoko’s brand of fish-free lox flavored vegan cream cheese (it uses seaweed). They also make a plain version that I’m not a big fan of because it has a slightly funny flavor, but the seaweed masks that nicely. It’s more expensive than the TJ’s version, but much more spreadable (just a little firmer than regular cream cheese). I don’t eat a lot of fake meat or cheese, but a little bit here or there is sometimes really good (mostly cheese- the only fake meat I eat is the the TJ’s soy chorizo, which is great with potatoes, onions, and peppers, if the breakfast poster still wants ideas and potatoes aren’t too high glycemic index- I bet you could add or swap in chickpeas as well).

    • Anonymous

      If salad is the meal I do ALL the toppings, but if its a side I’m much more laid back.

      – It’s mostly just a big bowl of leafy greens + dressing. Maybe 1-2 other toppings (cherry tomatoes, feta, etc) if I have them on hand.
      – I just get a carton of whatever greens I want (usually a big bag of kale or a plastic carton of spring mix or arugula) at the beginning of the week. I don’t really prep anything with my greens., just put them in a bowl when its dinner time. I do store them with a paper towel in the container to make it last longer.
      – Growing up we had a vegetable + a salad every night, and we’d do a bagged salad (the boring iceberg + shredded carrots one). Sometimes we’d jazz it up with cherry tomatoes, carrots, etc and sometimes it was just what was in the bag.

      If I have a side salad, I usually also have a vegetable and I’m just doing the side salad to further supplement + get more greens.

    • Anon

      I buy pre-washed spring mix. I tried buying leaf lettuce, but just couldn’t get into the groove of cleaning and washing daily portions, and washing it all at once made it spoil so fast. So I just suck it up and use the convenience version.

      The other veggies I go hard on a few at a time, to make sure we use them up. So one week I’ll buy yellow peppers and cukes, then tomatoes and mushrooms the next week, then radishes and carrots the third week. And so on.

    • Anon

      For my typical side salad I do some sort of spring mix, shredded carrot, thinly sliced shallot, salt, and pepper. Before I eat it I put some toasted slivered onions on top and a vinaigrette that’s usually olive oil, dijon mustard, and balsamic. Keep it simple. If you want to premake it, avoid wetter ingredients.

    • AIMS

      For side salad – my go-to is arugula (prewashed), with a drizzle of olive oil, salt & pepper, and shaved Parmesan on top (i literally take a vegetable peeler to a chunk of Parm and just shave off a few pieces). Sometimes I drizzle the whole thing with a little balsamic or add some other veggies (cherry tomatoes, random herbs, or mini cucumbers, if I have, or whatever else is hanging around). But it’s really satisfying somehow and easy to have on hand with no prep (and arugula tends to keep well). I now crave it when I don’t have it.

      • Anonymous

        Add lemon juice to this. Delicious.
        Also, there is no sham in buying salad in a bag. You might learn what you like and move on to making your own but these exist for a reason.

      • Anon

        The more salad I eat, the more salad I want to eat, and I used to hate salad. If I don’t have side salads for a couple of days I have to have a big meal salad to make up for it.

      • Curious

        You have just solved my how to eat enough salad with a 5 month old and cancer problem. THANK YOU.

    • Anon

      We buy a big tub of salad greens at the store every week and use it throughout the week for lunches and dinners (I WFH full-time, my husband is here three days a week).

      If we’re doing “meal salads” I will chop up other veggies (carrots, bell peppers, mushrooms, zucchini or squash – whatever) sometimes an apple or pear, and then we add goat or feta cheese and either leftover cooked protein from dinners (we make extra salmon expressly for this purpose) or deli meat. I always have Costco salad topper or other toasted nuts around to throw on top.

      For lunch or dinner side salads, most of the time it is just salad greens and dressing and salad topper. We get spring mix, so it’s not just uniformly one type of lettuce. Occasionally I get ambitious and chop up a veg or fruit and throw it in there, but that’s not usual.

      The key to not getting bored with daily salads, IMO, is to have a variety of dressings (Target has a ginger-miso dressing I use most of the time, but I will also use other bottled dressings or just use vinegar and oil) and using the salad topper, which is just a mix of dried cranberries and seeds. It adds a nice crunch and extra dimension to something that would otherwise get boring pretty fast.

    • Ribena

      I just buy bagged fresh salad leaves and out a handful on my plate. Whether I add dressing depends on the dinner – unhelpful, sorry! I also love a grated carrot salad or a broccoli salad, which I make in bulk one evening or at the weekend and then add liberally to all my meals.

    • Anon

      I am a salad almost every day person.
      Here are the things I have on hand to make various combinations of salad:
      – peanuts, pistachios, almonds or slivered almonds (costco box)
      – olives in brine
      – apples or grapes or cherry tomatoes
      – lemon
      – truffle olive oil.
      – whatever chopped greens I bought that week (rotate between spinach, kale only if shredded, arugula, shredded cabbage bag from Trader Joe’s, sometimes lettuce but I find it boring).

      Here are some of the salads I throw together as a side:
      – greens, almonds, olives, no dressing needed since the olives are plenty salty
      – boiled peanuts, shredded cabbage, halved cherry tomatoes topped with olive oil, salt, pepper
      – mung sprouts (bought from store), arugula, halved grapes to offset the sharpness of the arugula, olive oil, rock salt, generous lemon squeeze
      – all arugula, apples to offset sharpness, generous lemon squeeze to prevent apples getting brown
      – all spinach, pistachios (roasted and salted, from bag), something red to add color – cherry tomatoes or grapes, olive oil

      Basically I pick a green, a “fun” item and a protein (nut or sprouts). I LOVE the truffle oil and will eat more salad just to smell how heavenly it is. I also love the crunch and the saltiness of the olives in brine or the salted roasted nuts. I have perfected the art of making a large container full, quickly between meetings and also having time to eat it as a main for lunch and a side for dinner.

    • Anonymous

      I like Penzeys salad sprinkle for something a little different. My usual is arugula, olive oil, lemon juice, maybe some lemon zest, shredded parm, and s&p. Maybe throw in some pine nuts or walnuts if I have them. Pumpkin seeds in the fall.

    • Anan

      Leafy greens then whatever fruit, nuts/seeds or cheese I have on hand. And if I have random veggies to use up toss those in.
      Sometimes I will prep massaged kale ahead of time as the base.

    • Betsy

      Awesome replies! Thank you all, this is some great inspiration to get started!

      • Anon

        Mandy’s Gourmet Salads is a fantastic cookbook from a Montreal-based salad company!

    • Anonymous

      Bagged washed salad greens, purchased bottles of dressing, and no shame for buying either.

    • Coach Laura

      When I make it myself, I have a go-to easy balsamic dressing and I make a big batch ahead of time. I use romaine and spinach or kale or whatever I have on hand. Add cut up apple chunks or pear chunks; craisins or raisins or dried cherries; walnuts or pecans – roasted if possible; feta cheese crumbles or occasionally shredded cheddar or blue/gorgonzola.

      Sometimes I buy the smaller pre-prepared salad kit bags at Trader Joes. These are fantastic – they have a lot of kale, cabbage and other things that hold up in the fridge overnight if there are leftovers. Ranch or SW kind, I will add chunks of avocado. Kale – I add apple chunks. Pear ginger – I add pear chunks. Mediterranean I add extra feta and olives and maybe chickpeas.

    • Anon

      The Trader Joe’s bagged salads are awesome and an easy way to get more salad in your life.
      I generally don’t eat greens fast enough to not waste a bunch, so do non-leafy salads like just cucumber and tomatoes and feta with olive oil, balsamic, and salad and pepper. Or cucumbers and oranges with olive oil and a little red wine vinegar and salt and pepper. Could throw avocado or nuts in either of those too.

  21. Anon

    I have a 100YO tree in my yard that has grown sideways and, near the end of its life, needs to be taken down before it comes down on its own. It’s over two stories tall. Is there a way to save pieces and hopefully pay a local woodworker I follow on insta to make me some things out of it? Sometimes I am a bit too “re-use recycle”, but it’s oak and I feel like I want to keep a connection to the tree. Is there a way for the tree guys to take it down to account for this (and not run it all through the chipper)?

    • Anon

      The arborist you call to take down the tree should be able to save what you want. Some will mill it for you and I know of a couple in my area who sell like live edge slabs and artsy wood stuff. It’s definitely a thing.

    • Anon

      I’m sure you can do this, just coordinate with the company taking your tree down.

    • Anonymous

      For sure. We have take. Many trees down and the tree guys will leave whatever you want. Make sure you figure out how you are going to get it from your house to the wood guy. It’s heavy!

    • Anonymous

      I would talk to the artist first to find out what he needs, then talk to the arborist. The artist may even have a suggestion as to who could mill the wood.

    • Walnut

      Definitely! Make sure you clearly understand what your wood worker needs, talk to the tree removal person in advance and be actively available as the tree comes down. As soon as you see your preferred pieces come down, have the team move them to a separate spot and guard it with your life, so it doesn’t appear to be a “pile that was missed” at the end of the day.

    • Anon

      Oak is an excellent wood for starting mushrooms, so be sure to ask the tree company to leave you some healthy 6-ish inch diameter logs, cut to a size you can easily move. Shiitake and oyster mushrooms are probably the easiest to get started, but many types are available as spores and do great on oak logs.

  22. Anon

    I’m on the hunt for some shells. I used to have a number of sleeveless polyester shells from Loft, BR and jcrew that would go under cardigans, suit jackets and jardigans but I’m coming up way empty at all of the above. I know Nordstrom/Halogen has some but I find they have tons of extra fabric and have a shirt tail in the back (vs being all one length around the hem) and drape really oddly. Looking for something to wear untucked that looks clean at work. Is this a thing of the past?

    • Anonymous

      if you find something you like apart from a shirt-tail in the back, cutting off that shirt-tail is a super-easy alteration.

    • Anonymous

      Quince silk tops work well. If you have a belly, size up. They are cut for a narrowing middle.

    • Anonymous

      From your first sentence I thought you were talking about the beach and I was ready to live vicariously through you!

    • Seventh Sister

      I’m wearing one from Uniqlo today and I’m surprised at how much I like it – I usually strike out with Uniqlo tops.

  23. Anonymous

    Does anyone feel like their career will just amount to them being a worker bee and nothing more and they’re not satisfied with that?

    16 years out of law school, 10 years in biglaw and 6 in government. In NYC biglaw I worked all the time which is pretty standard; great reviews and was the one the partners HAD TO staff anytime a complicated case, trial team etc. came in. So they trusted me but were snippy all the time – which isn’t unheard of in that environment. I was the last associate left in my class but when partnership time came they laughed in my face almost literally – like YOU as OUR partner, like you’d ever have a book etc. And the ones who were supposed “mentors” looked away because it wasn’t politically expedient. Later it became apparent that the firm wasn’t financially flush and wasn’t going to “waste” a partnership on anyone that wasn’t a bro.

    Government has been better in some ways but again anything complicated comes in or anything that’ll require a ton of writing and I MUST be staffed on it – they will not let me decline. So then I’m the one writing 20-30 pagers and it results in middle mgmt./higher ups then saying “WE did a great job on this one” OR getting snippy with me because I dared used my judgment on structure, yet when I asked their input early on verbally and in email they say “fine” to anything I suggest because they can’t be bothered/don’t care.

    Just thinking about this, I can’t do it for two more decades. I’m not saying I need to be CEO of a F500 but I do need to be treated like more than everyone second year associate. The good reviews don’t do it for me; there’s no promotional potential in fed govt – they always use budget as an excuse but in reality when promotions come up they go to people who’ve been loyal for 2 decades not 6 years. What’s the solution here? Jump ship until I find something better? Leave law?

    And part of me can’t help but wonder is this because I’m Asian American? I’m hardly a stereotypical Asian from the movies sitting in the corner toiling away not saying a word – IDK anyone who is these days; I’m fine with networking events, I run meetings at work etc. Yet heaven forbid I ever stand up for myself (which isn’t daily – more like once every year or two when I’ve really had it), I’m quickly labeled angry or difficult or reminded this is a TEAM. Certainly a guy would be considered ambitious and assertive . . . . Help?

    • Anonymous

      You’ve been posting about this issue for six years. When are you going to see a therapist?

    • Anon

      I’m not sure I have an answer, OP, but I certainly commiserate. I’m an income partner feeling like I’ll never make equity. I’m not sure there’s a perfect solution or path. There are definitely obstacles everywhere.

      Sorry not to have better ideas but I definitely understand.

    • anon

      I’m so sorry. Would a conversation with your manager help, e.g., professional development, workload concerns, etc.? If not, and your management chain is taking you for granted, you may have to move around in your agency or within in the government if you want to stay there. I’d also suggest identifying what you are looking for from a promotion or in your career. Is it more autonomy? Respect? Management experience? Involvement in business or policy decisions? Financial security? Work/life balance? Once you can nail down what you want, you can tailor your next steps. Sometimes moving up doesn’t help address what you need, and sometimes it does.

    • anon-for-this

      I am an Asian American woman, I work hard, and (I think) I am also seen as a leader at my company (tech, not law) and I stand up for myself and my wants and needs.
      Do you have any mentors you could talk to? Professional development, especially targeted towards women? It could be your company; it could be that there are things you could/should do differently. But just sending a word of encouragement that I think it is possible for you to get what you want!

  24. Anon

    please don’t roast me for this comment

    for some of us, it is tough to hear about others kids as we go through fertility struggles.

    may i remind posters that corporette moms is a better place to post about asks and advice on children? for those who have just lost a baby or struggling for a double line, it can be really difficult to read a Moms thread in the main site.

    thank you for your sensitivity.

    • Anonymous

      I am also struggling with infertility and multiple consecutive losses, so you have my commiseration and empathy. However, the vast majority of the population is not dealing with infertility. It is neither feasible nor remotely reasonable to ask the world, or even this site, to accommodate my own personal triggers regarding this topic. Infertility can be extremely isolating and all-consuming, and can easily lead to navel gazing. The reality is that it is my own responsibility to control my reactions and, luckily for people like us, it is extremely easy to scroll past these discussions. Best wishes to you on your journey.

      • Anon

        I agree with this take. Mine wasn’t infertility, but losing a child to cancer. I had to go to therapy to deal with my own feeling rather than feeling like the rest of the world was having children at me.

    • Anon

      You don’t have to read everything that is posted here. I collapse all threads then skip over the ones that don’t interest me.

      • Anon

        i didn’t ask anyone to stop posting just follow the Moms and regular site structure.

        millions go through this and it’s different for all

        • Anonymous

          I am sorry for you but this is not a reasonable request. You are not the moderator here and the actual moderators have not chosen to draw that line for their own reason or no reason.

        • Cat

          The slight sting of seeing posts about “just found out I’m pregnant, what to do about my job search” is real, but I don’t think your request is reasonable. I feel like the moms s-te is great for baby and toddler-specific questions but it’s designed for ONLY moms – and questions here, even if they involve children, receive useful replies from non-parents as well.

          I’m sorry for your struggles. try to scroll and collapse threads and block it out if painful.

        • Anon

          “Follow the moms and regular site structure” is completely unreasonable. This site predated the moms page by many years and there have always been lots of discussions about mom stuff here too. While the other site is intended specifically for moms and parenting; this one has always allowed discussion of any topic, including kids. There are people who read here who don’t read there and vice versa. I’m very sorry you’re struggling with infertility but this request is insanely self-centered. I have a friend whose 3 year old died, and she doesn’t go through life expecting other people to never mention their children.

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