ByKat Hours Updated
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Coffee Break: Rockstud T-Strap Pump

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hot pink T-strap pump with rockstud details

If you're still in your Barbie phase for dressing, I have to say: I've seen these in person and they are the absolute perfect shade of pink. Saturated, rich, and bright — they really deliver.

I also have a minor theory that T-strap pumps are coming around again — it's been a while since they were last in, and there are a surprising number available right now among the designer brands — but we shall see.

The hot pink pumps are $1190, available at Nordstrom and other department stores.

Looking for something similar but with less inches? These kitten-heeled Stuart Weitzman pumps look great, as do these affordable suede ones from Calvin Klein ($99). In terms of flats, this pair of Birdies looks great.

Hunting for more sedate T-strap pumps? These are some of our favorite T-strap pumps for work:

black patent T-strap pump with multiple straps at toe
SJP, $385
black strappy work pumps with T-strap-like detail
Tamara Mellon, $795
black T-strap pump with rockstud details
Valentino, $1,190

Sales of note for 4/24/25:

  • Nordstrom – 7,710 new markdowns for women!
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  • Banana Republic Factory – Up to 50% off everything + extra 25% off
  • Boden – 25% off everything (ends 4/27) (a rare sale!)
  • The Fold – Up to 25% off
  • Eloquii – Spring Clearance: Up to 75% off + extra 50-60% off sale
  • J.Crew – Mid-Season Sale: Up to 60% off sale styles + up to 50% off summer-ready styles
  • J.Crew Factory – Extra 50% off clearance + extra 15% off $100 + extra 20% off $125
  • Kule – Lots of sweaters up to 50% off
  • M.M.LaFleur – 3 pieces for $198. Try code CORPORETTE15 for 15% off
  • Rothy's – Final Few: Up to 50% off last chance styles; new favorites added
  • Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
  • Talbots – Friends & Family Event: 30% off entire purchase, includes markdowns

119 Comments

  1. Gah. I literally gasped when I saw these! If I were still wearing heels…

    2. I’m so thankful they’re $1190. If they were $100 I would be tempted to put my feet through wearing them.

    4. Attorney Martinez would rock these! Secretly fangirling hoping she posts here!

    6. Questions to ask yourself before you buy these –

      1) do you have giant breast implants?

      2) do you wear a lot of body con?

      3) is your secret career goal to be a real housewife?

      4) do you get kicked out of broadway shows for vaping?

      If you answered “yes” to at least 3 questions above, you should buy the shoes.

  2. Need excellent divorce lawyer in SF Bay Area. Spouse has significant assets and was the victim of DV. Thanks in advance

  3. Need divorce lawyer in SF Bay Area. Spouse has significant assets (that they want to protect from STBX)

  4. Need divorce lawyer in SF Bay Area. Person brought significant assets into the marriage that they wish to fight for.

  5. Need divorce lawyer in SF Bay Area. Person brought significant assets into marriage they wish to fight for

      1. Blevans & Blevans in Sonoma County practice statewide and specialize in high net worth divorces.

  6. My new boyfriend has started smoking since about Month 3 of our relationship. It has now been 9 months. He has “quit” at least a half dozen times, only to pick it up again. I am getting worn down by the lack of truth in the whole thing. He recently admitted that he was smoking occasionally when we met. Also, I am tired of his expecting me to celebrate/acknowledge his “quitting” every time when it only lasts for a few days, and then pretending I don’t know until he admits it.

    He has other health issues that will definitely worsen by the smoking. Last Friday we literally were boarding a plane when he had heart attack symptoms…so the vacation I planned was cancelled and we spent the day in the hospital after a fun ambulance ride. He had a real heart attack several years back. We are mid 40s.

    He is the only guy I have clicked with in many years. I love him. Is this just the price of admission? I am so sad when I think of how long this relationship can realistically last, and how it will feel to be constantly lied to. I never would have swiped right if he had answered the questions on smoking, drinking, and lifestyle honestly.

    2. The lying is the real issue, and it will never stop.
      If you need to hear it’s ok to end things, then I’m telling you that it’s ok to end things.

    3. Yes this is a price of admission. I wouldn’t want to date this guy and you’re not a bad person if you end this relationship because he won’t take care of his health.

    4. This is the price of admission. Smoking is very hard to quit. The seesaw of lows and highs with the constant quitting attempt would wear me out. Can you compromise on him smoking outside only with a smoking jacket on? Maybe a celebration once he has been a month smoke free, then every two months etc.

      My father started when he was 12. Smoked after I asked him to stop and my sister had asthma as a child. Limited it to one room when we moved into a new house in our teenage years. Switched to outside only when my mom got colon cancer and his brother (a smoker), died of lung cancer. Only stopped entirely when he got lung cancer himself. Promptly gained about 30 lbs. He had smoked for 50+ years at that point. Only saving grace is that my kids are always surprised when they see a picture of him smoking as they never knew him to smoke. Keeps him motivated I think.

    5. Move on. You aren’t “clicking” with him; he’s lying to you and therefore, it sounds like you’re on the same page when you aren’t.

    6. My husband was a smoker, but he never lied to me about it. I want you to read your post out loud to yourself, and then go dump this loser. You deserve better.

    7. You wouldn’t have dated him if you knew this, which makes me feel that you should give yourself permission to leave. I’d be very scared and stressed if someone I loved was smoking after having a heart attack. If it’s something you can accept, more power to you.

    8. Is he seeing a doctor and therapist to try to take care of this habit, and himself?

      He likely can’t quit on his own. Nicotine is highly, highly addictive, and I have friends just like your partner. Some people are genetically prone to this addiction and to quit they need medication and therapy to address triggers. Now with the additional history of a heart attack, and maybe now…. panic attacks?!?…. That’s a lot for someone to be dealing with already in their 40s.

      If you really think this is a keeper, outside of these health issues…. I might have a sit down moment of true caring and honesty with him.

      I really care about you.
      I love you.
      I see you as someone I really want to be with.

      But I am scared and worried about your health issues. I want you here with me, and I want someone who wants to be with me too.
      Alive with me.

      Are you willing to start seeing the doctors and therapists and support groups that will help you get there? To help you quit smoking, and get healthy in every way?

      If so, I will be there with you, and will help you.
      I love you.
      But you need to do this for yourself, if you want to be together.

    9. Did he just start after 3 months? Or did he keep it a secret for 1st three months. The deviousness would repulse me more than the actual smoking.

      1. He admitted he was “occasionally” smoking when they met but didn’t tell her.

    10. I’m sorry, this is hard. It’s probably the price of admission but not one I’d be willing to pay. Smoking is too dangerous to everyone around the smoker.

    11. I used to be a social/casual smoker. When we were dating, my now-husband said that it was a terrible habit that he hated, it smelled gross, etc.

      You can decide if this is a full deal breaker or if you want to draw a bright line about smoking. You can also stop tiptoeing around it

    12. This would be a dealbreaker for me, as I have asthma and can’t stand being around someone who smokes. I also don’t think I could forgive the lying. But if you’re not so sensitive and you really do want to be with him, I wonder if medication could help. My brother was able to quit smoking for a girlfriend with pharmaceutical assistance, and a decade plus later he still doesn’t smoke. I also wonder if wegovy, etc. have the same effect on smoking as they seem to have on drinking and eating. But those things will only work if he really wants to quit. I don’t think you can assume he’ll want to change.

    13. One fallacy it’s easy to cling to is thinking “he’s the only one I clicked with.” I found once I started dating and dumping quickly, there were lots more people I clicked with. It feels that way when you drag out relationships and try too hard to make them work.

      1. Maybe another 6 months? By then I will have given him a full year to quit the habit that he allegedly did not have until after we started dating (except that he sort of did).

        I thought this was the one. I don’t know if I can date again after this. It took dozens of first dates over 10 years to find him (plus several other men who showed their true colors after I was already hooked).

        This man actually looked me straight in the eye on our third date and said “if you’re worried about addiction issues, you need not worry with me. I am simply not wired that way.”

        1. He looked you in the eye and said not to worry about addiction issues? He literally lied to your face. He is addicted to smoking.

        2. If he’s willing to lie like that, I would be concerned that he seems to be the one because he is willing to seem however he needs to seem. Unless this was just his denialism as he genuinely tried to quit and then failed!

        3. You know this guy doesn’t see a problem with continually lying to your face. He isn’t The One, this isn’t the best relationship you’ve had in years. This is a guy who lied to trick you into dating him. Even if he magically quits smoking you’re still in relationship with a liar. Don’t invest any more time into this sinking ship.

        5. Gently, you are just kidding yourself with another six months because you don’t want to deal with ending this. Things are much worse now than six months ago and he has been dishonest from Day 1. Six months will not fix that.

        6. I asked how long you’d put up with this, because anything less than ‘I could put up with it forever’ is a good sign you’re not where you should be.

        7. Dump him tmrw. He was a smoker when you met, he lied about it, he’s never quitting.

    16. It’s the feeling constantly lied to part that would be the true deal breaker for me. I always thought smoking was a no go and then I fell in love with a smoker. But he was always honest about it. (And did actually quit about a year in to our relationship with zero prompting from me.)

    17. I would have left after the first time I caught him lying. I know you are much deeper in now, and care about him, but in addition to being a smoker who smokes, he’s also a lier who lies. The latter won’t change even if the former does. Don’t do this to yourself.

    18. Thanks ladies. You have talked sense into me. I will start planning a way out. I might wait until after concert season. I don’t want to sit alone at the SIX shows I have non-refundable tickets for. I’ve been there before, and I can never find a friend to come. Tired of always going alone and even crying at my table.

      1. I dunno, I’d rather sit alone than with someone who has no problem lying straight to my face multiple times. But I guess YMMV

      2. Oh come on, you know you need to do it now. It will NOT make it easier to wait to dump him. It will make it much, much harder.

      4. So you only have a problem with lying when it doesn’t benefit you. If you stay with him just so you aren’t sitting alone at a show then you are as bad as he is.

      5. Figure out how to deal with the six shows. Sell the tickets, invite different people, invite family members. I’m sorry that this is where you are, it hurts, and you’ve tried so hard to find a special person. You do not want to be with a liar. Honesty is baseline to a relationship.

      1. He’s a 45 year old smoker who has already had a heart attack. He’s not getting life insurance.

    21. this is the price of admission- not just the smoking, but the other things you listed most importantly the LYING!! just because it’s the price doesn’t mean you have to pay it though. “price of admission” just means “what you need to accept IF you want to date this particular person.”

    22. Only you can decide what is price of admission versus dealbreaker. Smoking would be a dealbreaker for me. But, I think lying should be a dealbreaker for all of us.
      In your post and responses, you sound really reluctant to break up with him. Life is much easier when you realize it is WAY better to be alone than to be with the wrong person.

    23. Lying about the smoking — from the start — is a dealbreaker. You may move him to the friend zone if you feel the clicking is genuine, but he may not remain as a life partner, not while he smokes and lies about it to you.

  7. Those black satin BRF pants someone recommended came in yesterday, and they are soooo cute! They are VERY high waisted but it isn’t uncomfortable because the material is flexible. I took my true size, but I could see how you might want to size up if you’re more of an apple shape.

    2. Ooh, thanks for the update! I might go for them – and they come in purple now too!

    3. I got them too. Usually a 16P and the 18P was more flattering. They are very cute/fun.

  8. I know this has been asked before but I just couldn’t find it despite searching this site for 1.5 hours. Going to be in NYC (Times Sq Sheraton) next week for work. I don’t love that area generally as it seems too touristy, so appreciate any tips on places to go, eat, see in and around. I will have a number of meetings in that area so would be difficult to go too far out even in a cab. Especially would appreciate recommendations on lunch and dinner places or even great cafes.

    1. My favorite place to eat in midtown is Sen Sakana—it’s Peruvian/Japanese. Mostly sushi and ceviche. I’d also head over to 9th Ave—Hells Kitchen—for more of a neighborhood feel. The weather should be nice—a good time of year for a walk in Central Park.

      1. Ditto to all of this exactly. Also, Lidia Bastianich’s sort of fast casual (but not a chain) restaurant, Becco, on W 46th, is pretty good and affordable, and is surrounded by a bunch of decent restaurants that mostly cater to the theater crowd.

    2. there’s a Turkish place on the west side of 9th avenue, between 44th and 45th, that is always amazing, but i can never remember the name of…

      the Tick Tock cafe is always good (34th and 9th), too.

      oh! and if you can walk down to 32nd street and shop at some of the k-beauty shops there – also great korean dining in general.

      1. Anatalia? I used to work right around there and it was our special occasion restaurant, that was many years ago but it was wonderful!

    3. Dell Anima – get the Brussel sprouts! Everything else is delicious as well, but if you like Brussel sprouts, you won’t be sorry!

    4. Echoing the head to Ninth Ave advice. You’ll be smack in the middle of midtown, so a lot of corporate/chain type spots nearby, but you aren’t doomed to that.

      – Ariana Afghan Kebab is a neighborhood classic (I’ve gone there for over 30 years!)
      – same thing for Wondee Siam, it’s fantastic and not at all fancy
      – Taim has delicious falafel
      – you’ll be close to Ippudo Ramen, which is great
      – Glass House Tavern is fun for late-night, because a lot of Broadway performers and crew go after their shows
      – If you grab morning coffee to go, head to Paley Park to sit and escape the sounds of the city and do some fun people-watching

    5. Just head toward 5th Avenue / away from 7th/8th and it becomes less touristy. There are so many restaurants but I wouldn’t miss a drink at the Algonquin, even thought it’s in the heart of it all.

      Hopefully you have time to go to TKTS and get a ticket for a random same-day show. That’s always so fun.

    6. Fair warning, as I stayed at that hotel last month: my room was having a very, very bad week.
      –wet towels left in tub when I arrived
      –locked out when the electronic lock failed (not the card, the lock itself)
      –ice machine broken
      –toilet innards broke and started flooding bathroom (just water, discovered in time by chance)
      –locked out AGAIN when the electronic lock, which supposedly had been fixed again, broke again

      Also, check in online if at all possible. The lines when either the airline crews or the conventioneers come were out the door and it is a very long lobby.

  9. Kat: Is there any way to avoid auto-playing audio ads? That Chinet ad with the cowboys in particular keeps coming on super loud if I’m on this page too long. I’ll turn off the sound and sometimes it restarts when I scroll.

    1. There aren’t supposed to be ANY auto-playing ads, at all — if there are then the advertiser lied somewhere in the process. The best thing you can do is report the ad to Mediavine and note that it was playing a sound – if you can catch the name of the advertiser that helps immensely. I think readers had a handy way to manually turn off sound also…

      Thank you for your patience!

      2. I also get autoplay, often with sound, all the time. pretty much always at least one autoplaying ad at a time. you may want to do some further digging because it sounds like what you think you’re getting from advertisers doesn’t match up!

      4. Just now I have seen UPS, Crate and Barrel, Carnival cruises, and some paper plate ad..

      5. How do I report to Mediavine? I tried to figure it out earlier but couldn’t see a button or anything; ended up sending you a tech ticket in lieu

        1. If you hover over the ad you should see text that says “Report this Ad.”

          Yikes, sorry to hear everyone is getting so many! I know I got one yesterday for Amazon Streaming or something that I reported. I have tried to turn off the most annoying ads for coffee break and the morning workwear posts for at least the first day they’re up…

      7. I get these constantly Kat, to the point that I almost quit reading this site. I followed someone’s instructions here to permanently mute the sound for this site on Chrome and that’s been the only thing that helps. The video still plays. I tried reporting an ad once and it just took me to the advertiser’s page, and honestly I’m here for a mental break not to report ads.

        1. Yeah this, they are constantly trying to auto play. Before I discovered how to block sound here I would get a loud autoplay, report it, then 2 min later get the exact same one.

      8. Daily, all the time; honestly I had assumed the site admin was just cool with it despite the protestations. My computer is on mute because of this site. Also on chrome.

    2. Someone else once posted that you can mute specific websites in the settings of your browser, so I did that for this site and it fixed the problem. Reporting the ads didn’t change anything for me.

    3. if you’re using google chrome, right click on the site tab and there should be an option to “Mute site”. That should take care of it, and it’ll persists across any new browser windows you open.

  11. A few years ago, I went on a date with a guy who was very aggressive at the end of the night. I had gone back to his place to charge my phone but he wound up being really kind of forceful in trying to initiate gardening (groping, unreciprocated kissing, not stopping even as I continued to stop him). Eventually I got out of the house after a few times of him trying this, and the next morning he sent a text to apologize for ‘pressuring me into anything I wasn’t into.’ He then tries to hang out again, before admitting that he actually has a girlfriend.

    He texted me a few more times over the next few months, to tell me that even though he loves his girlfriend, he’s never had as strong of a connection with anyone as me and keeps imagining what it would be like to be with me instead. I forgot about him for a few years, but the experience did give me trust issues of a sort, as he seemed like a very gentle ‘nice guy’ and I had really liked him.

    Fast-forward, I’ve been seeing my current partner fo 2-3 years, and we’re planning to wind up together. But it turns out, former date is in my partner’s extended social group. They’ve never met, but they have a ton of mutual friends and BF knows a lot of guys who were close with him in college. It turns out former date is still with the girlfriend, and I feel so… annoyed by it. It keeps nagging at me that people don’t know what a creep this guy is, and that his girlfriend doesn’t know either. I feel a bit wronged by the whole thing still, maybe, and also just kind of mad that terrible guys can be terrible without any consequences.

    My question is: if you were his girlfriend and are going to potentially marry this guy, would you want to know he cheated on you? Part of me wants to create an anonymous Instagram account to send her a message about the story, just so she has the info in case she wants it. We’re in our late twenties and she could find someone who wasn’t a skeev to settle down with, or at least have all the information she needs to make an informed decision. Versus winding up 20 years into a marriage with him, saddled with kids together. Another part of me knows the likely advice would be to stay out of it, it’s none of my business, he could’ve changed and it was just a blip in their otherwise happy story.

    If it had just been a kiss and a date, I don’t think it would bother me so much. But the fact that he was so aggressive and seemed to not care at all about consent, while also having a girlfriend, just makes me mad. Do you think it’s possible it was a one-time thing and he’s a great guy now? Is it crazy of me to still be bothered by this? Why is the advice usually not to tell the person someone cheated on?

    1. Based on your story, this guy is a lying cheating scumbag who participates in r a p e culture. From coercing you to trying to do damage control, and then even carrying on chasing you after it’s evident he’s taken.

      Unfortunately, I don’t think there’s a good way for you to intervene – and I say this as someone who has blown the whistle to the girlfriend rather successfully. The reason being, anonymous messages are never taken seriously, and this happened a few years ago. It would probably be seen as dredging up old stuff/raining on the parade. Even if you attempt to be anonymous, it is possible that the guy would find out you had done this and create more problems. The world is a small place and with how blatant he’s been, it is likely to have come up, or will come up in this marriage, but then it isn’t your problem.

      My view is, we cross paths with lots of people in life and yes there is no karma or justice for cr a ppy people like this. Take heart in the fact that you’re secure in your own relationship

      1. Thank you for your thoughtful response. That is helpful. If you’re willing to share, how did you go about confronting a girlfriend and how did it go?

        1. He had picked me up when we had met on the road and led me on for a month or so, we had been planning to meet up in the city I live in. My friends told me there was something suspicious about him, so I ran a background check and found out he lived with this long-term girlfriend.

          I hesitated quite a long while before reaching out to her but for me it felt like the right thing to do. I got her phone number from the background check, and texted her including a slide deck that I had compiled. The texts he had sent me were extremely incriminating and made it clear that I was only looking out for her own good.

          She took me seriously but as far as I know, they fought for a couple months but have been back together for the past year. How happily, I don’t know.

        1. People do not always know they’re being cheated on, BUT I have a hard time thinking that OP is the only person he’s tried non consensual stuff with. Probably including his gf.

          I think the anonymous aspect of this makes it very difficult to pull off, and the fact it was so long ago. I don’t think that people should always just stay out of it, but this is one because of those factors.

      2. Maybe.

        I would make a point of walking up to him and his girlfriend when you are with your boyfriend, and saying…..

        Hello! Wow… It’s been a long time since we had our Tinder date on September 14th, 2020. How the hell are you?

        with a big smile

        2. With all due respect I don’t think this is going to have the impact you think it is. Direct confrontation puts them both on the spot and it would likely be seen negatively by her (whom is the person you want to impact). It would make him upset unnecessarily.

          Honestly, I think if you want to tell her, I would stick to the facts that you both went on dates in the past. You can justify it by saying that you didn’t want her to find out some other way. Suss it out and see if she wants more information (i.e. about him chasing you).

          You have to be prepared for any adverse blowback of disclosing, but I think giving her the space to process and accept the information privately is very important. Remember, you have the receipts.

          1. Exactly, the kind of satisfying encounter you hope is going to happen just simply won’t.

      3. This is almost always true, and I agree.

        For the OP: I am middle aged and have seen a lot. In my experience, no, he hasn’t magically changed and she will one day rip herself apart from him and wonder why she wasted so much of her life with the SOB.

      4. I wouldn’t assume she knows, but I don’t think anything good will come from telling her.

      5. I don’t think this is necessarily true and is a lazy response to this kind of thing and also crappy for putting blame on the woman. I dated a guy who did horrible things to other women after our relationship and maybe before and during, but he never did them to me. I believe that he did terrible things, but I had no idea at the time that he was like that. It would have made me feel awful if people had this attitude about me.

        2. I agree that this is lazy and seems to put blame on women; my sense is that a lot of bad actors actively cultivate a lot of relationships in which they behave well. I’m sorry you went through this and don’t blame you at all for not knowing.

          1. This. It is putting the burden of responsibility on someone who is being lied to and deceived.

        3. This. Abusers are very capable of picking and choosing when they show their true colors. See the Danny Masterson case and the glowing letters of support from Ashton and Mila for that playing out IRL.

    3. Can you bring it up with your BF? If he mentions it to someone in their shared circles, then someone who actually knows her can make the call on whether to share. The reality is that you probably weren’t the first or last person he’s done this with so she likely has some clue already and is choosing to stay. I don’t think telling her will change that unless perhaps it were a discussion with someone she trusted very much. I think you’re giving yourself too much credit–actually, the more accurate word is guilt–for having any sway over their relationship.

    4. This sounds SO much like a guy I went to college with. Any chance his name is Dave? (Jk, sadly I know there are too many guys like this)

    5. I dated a guy who kept telling me funny stories about his ex, and we stopped dating for other reasons (I wasn’t feeling it) and then I heard she wasn’t his ex, she was his current, and then I unexpectedly ran into them together socially. I was kind of alone with them and he was mute and staring, I introduced myself to her, mentioned the k already knew her husband, “hi Andrew,” and said to the wife “congratulations on your successful union” and asked away. I heard her asking her husband “what was that about?” And I actually don’t care how he answered her.

  12. Has anyone here read Happiness Falls? I NEED to discuss it and don’t know anyone in real life who’s read it. Specifically there’s a line on p. 304 that seems to suggest an entirely different ending (events taking place after the conclusion of the book) and I’m baffled!

    1. I read it, but returned it to the library so I don’t know which line you’re talking about. I do think the ending was supposed to be deliberately ambiguous, if that’s what you mean?

      1. Yeah, the ending was deliberately ambiguous and I’m curious about what people thought happened.
        But the specific line I was referencing was something else. It sad something like ‘we didn’t realize the significance of X until later on when Y happened’ and Y never happened within the narrative of the book. I’m trying to be vague so as not to spoil for anyone else, but if it had happened it would have been a fairly big ‘twist’ so I’m kind of confused about whether or not I missed something or whether it was implied that Y happened subsequently to the events that ended the book.

        1. Hmm, trying to remember what you’re talking about and I feel like there were actually several of those that were deliberately worded in such a way to imply one thing while actually meaning something else. I have mixed feelings about the book- lots of things I really liked and it was exploring some interesting ideas, but I always get a little annoyed at things like that where I feel like I’m being too overtly manipulated by the author/narrator. I don’t THINK there was supposed to be some other twist ending, though, beyond the deliberately vague one.

  13. Is there a polite way to ask not to have to work with someone who has bullied you in the past? My boss recently suggested hiring a consultant that I feel uncomfortable working with. (I should note that my boss is also friends with this person – and so I might just need to suck it up).

    1. Yeah unfortunately if your boss is friends with this person I think you’re kind of SOL. Sorry, it sucks. I’ve been there.

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