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Updated: Oct 31, 2018 142 Comments · by

Weekend Open Thread

Weekend Open Thread

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Paige Denim 'Sierra' Overalls | CorporetteSomething on your mind? Chat about it here. There are a lot of interesting trends that, I think, are going mainstream right now… including overalls. As someone who had a pair the last time they had a moment (1995!), my first thought was YIKES — but honestly a lot of them look really cute for chillier nights out, particularly with a moto jacket and heels. They're a bit more practical than a jumpsuit, and a bit more flattering than boyfriend jeans. This pair from Paige looks great — I like the skinny legs, as well as the relatively low-slung nature of the bib; the patchwork on the leg also feels very on trend. They're $200 (were $299) at Nordstrom. Paige Denim ‘Sierra' Overalls Here's a more affordable pair, available in five washes. (Oh, and: Shopbop has more sizes of the Paige jeans.) (L-4)

Sales of note for 9.10.24

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Comments

    • Killer Kitten Heels

      You know, I was kind of with Kat on the “more practical than a jumpsuit” point, because, ok, sure, I can see that. But “a bit more flattering than boyfriend jeans?” On what planet is it more flattering to anyone to encase their body in tight-fitting distressed denim farmer-ware than it is to just wear a good pair of dark-wash boyfriend jeans and a cute top? What am I missing?

  3. Wildkitten

    What’s a good present for someone who just got a science PhD? She doesn’t have a post grad job lined up yet but will go into corporate work not academia. Budget under $100 but under $50 would be nice.

    • Anonymous

      Manicure and pedicure! Massage! Anything else that is relaxing and indulgent! – PhD Student

      • Anonymous

        I second the massage or mani/pedi. Also a congratulatory card. Another science PhD

        • Mpls

          In all seriousness, if she’s going into corporate work, I wouldn’t get her a lab coat. Every industry lab I’ve been in supplies them, and rotates them out with new clean ones on a regular basis. Assuming she’s in the lab at all. You could find her an awesome pair of safety glasses, though…

        • hoola hoopa

          hehe, I love these ideas.

          Seriously, though, a little luxury. Mani/Pedi, massage, dinner out, etc. I appreciated being able to crawl out of my dark hole and do something that cost money that more than commemorative tokens or things for my desk.

    • bridget

      Either find something really cute on ThinkGeek, or get her a nice business card holder, briefcase, tote, etc., and/or a bottle of wine.

      • Killer Kitten Heels

        Clearly the correct answer is distractingly s*xy pink lab coat with “No Boys Allowed” bedazzled across the back of it. And a princess crown painted underneath in glitter paint.

  4. April Fools?

    Blink…Blink….How long was I asleep? It’s April Fools Day, right? OH GOD!

    • cc

      Kats got to realize people don’t come here for those looks that only bloggers can wear. cmon kat. overalls and hells??

      • A

        These aren’t even overalls that are on trend, and even the kind that are trendy are probably wayyyyy too young for any career woman on this site. Yikes! Is it Canadian April Fool’s day or something?

  6. Anonymou$e

    I have a question aimed at those whose monthly income greatly exceeds their monthly expenses – what are you doing with the money? Once the mortgage and bills are paid, 529 deposits are made, the 401k is funded, the student loans are all paid off, and the savings account is completely overflowing — then what? We already have quite a bit in mutual funds and are thinking the market is very overvalued so aren’t inclined to put more there. Is the next step real estate? (I fully realize this is a very privileged question to ask, which is why I’m asking it on a forum with a lot of others in high-earning professions rather than to my friends, who largely work in lower-paying fields.)

    • Anonymous

      We invested in real estate. We bought a rental house. We feel like we already have quite a bit exposure to the market through our 401(k)’s. My husband did a lot of research and searching and the investment is cash positive.

      You could also invest in municipal bonds (which have fairly low return) but have favorable tax and would diversify your portfolio. We also make a lot of charitable donations- spread the wealth and decrease effective tax rate.

    • anon

      I’m in the same boat. Several more decades until retirement. No student loans. House paid off. 401k fully funded. Already have additional mutual funds outside of 401k. Doing Roth conversions also. Saving account maxed out to FDIC coverage. After that, you don’t really have any options if the interest rate is going to stay where it is for the foreseeable future. Don’t bother with MMF, bonds, CDs, or a second savings account because return is so low you’ll be losing money to inflation. I agree that there is concern that the stock market may be disconnected from market realities because there is no where else to invest, but see if you can push your comfort level on that, because honestly that is the only place. There is also inflation adjusted treasury bonds or I-bonds (something like that) that you could put a little in to at least not have your money decreasing in value due to inflation. Don’t bother with real estate flipping unless you don’t have a full time job. Consider a rental property, but consider also the headache. I just decided there was nothing else I could do but wait. BTW, I ended up in this position by going to what is often referred to as a TTT lawschool on full scholarship. So for those judgmental of TTT schools, you could be in my boat.

      • Sarabeth

        You may know this, but for the record: FDIC limits are per institution, so you can always open more accounts at another institution. Although, a couple can hold up to $1 million at a single institution ($250,000 per single account, $250,000 per owner of a joint account), and I can’t think of many reasons you’d need more than that in cash. Even $250,000, for a single person, is way more cash than most people should be holding unless they are planning a big purchase in the near future.

      • Trish

        My favorite charities are the Salvation Army and the Equal Justice Initiative. The local legal aid programs always need donations, too.

      • Senior Attorney

        This. Find a cause you really believe in and make a difference.

        Also, travel to All The Places.

    • Carrie...

      Maybe balance out your stock market investments, with some international and bonds based on your comfort level.

      I just cannot stomach being a landlord. So I am considering REITs instead.

      I am also considering the Lending Club. Search for “the-lending-club-experiment” on the Mr. Money Mustache website.

      Consider investing in items that hold their value and may appreciate long term, especially if they are important to you (hobbies, family interests). Some of my musical instruments have appreciated very well, and if you are comfortable with art, that is an option.

      Spend some of it on really wonderful vacations and memories NOW, as you never know what will happen health/family wise in the future. Retirement is not always what you imagine.

      I also agree with giving away more. Figure out where you would like to make a difference, and do it!

      • anon

        Good advice. I assumed when OP mentioned she was already in mutual funds that she already had a well balanced portfolio of index funds for large cap (S&P tracker), mid-call, small-cap (each with a blend of value and growth), international (I went with a Vanguard fund that had a blend of both emerging and established), and then something that was anti-inflation (gold or REIT; I went with REIT). REIT is definitely easier than being a landlord and you still get the benefits of appreciation in value of land.

    • Sarabeth

      Unless you’ve got lots of expertise, don’t try to time the market. Do diversify your investments, which may mean real estate. For that, unless you really want to take on a part-time job as a property manager, look at REITs (which are basically the real estate equivalent of mutual funds). Diversification might also mean investing in international index funds, international bonds, etc. If you or anyone you love wants kids, ever, start some 529 accounts (you can list yourself as the beneficiary and switch it later, if you don’t have kids now but want them in the future).

      More broadly, get yourself to the bogleheads forums and read up on investment principles, since that seems to be your core question, rather than ‘what do I spend this money on’? I’m going to assume you do already make charitable donations. If not, consider starting to do so, or increasing them – look at https://www.givingwhatwecan.org/ for a very compelling argument for this.

    • Emma

      I don’t fall into the category described, so I can’t speak from experience.

      My reaction to your question, however, would be — if your retirement / children’s needs / etc etc are really and truly covered — I would switch around the question a little bit. Rather than ask what you should do (what is the “right thing”), I would ask what you WANT to do. And I mean really, truly, deeply want. It seems like you might have an opportunity to think about what you want your life to mean, what is your purpose on earth.

      For instance, if you realize that one of your absolute passions is traveling, save it up to travel. If it’s your family, maybe start a fund to help finance your kids’ home down payments, or your grandkids’ educations, or whatever. If there’s some cause that you care passionately about, find a way to use your money to benefit that cause.

      When I try to think what I would want to do in your shoes, I think I would want to take advantage of that opportunity to be really purposeful about your life, and use your money in a way that you can work toward leaving whatever kind of impact you want to have, or the life you most want to live.

    • DC Anon

      You put your money in some income-producing funds (dividend-paying indexes and some fixed income funds), collect the income and stop needing to work for money. And then you can do whatever you want. At least, that’s what I’d do in your case. Have you read the Mr. Money Mustache blog on early financial independence?

      • anon

        Isn’t there something called Aristocrat funds or something like that, which, to qualify for the nickname, means they had to have paid dividends each year (or quarter?) for the past 25 years? If I was looking for dividend paying stocks, I always thought I would start there.

    • anon

      What about those websites where you can offer microloans to women in developing countries? If you get the money back, that’s awesome and you can lend it again, and if somehow you don’t, you can afford the small loss. If you’re fully funded for your own future, why not support the future of others?! (And if that’s interesting to you, you can always consider setting up scholarships at your former high school or the one whose district you currently live in or making donations to women’s shelters or so many other focused donation processes!)

    • houda

      I am still not in that situation, but I paid off school, and have about one more year of payments on my apartment if I put all my savings towards this. My retirement etc. is handled.
      Since I am relatively minimalist, I do not have large expenditures on “things”. As my income will grow, I have already mapped what I would do.
      I am actively involved in an association I founded with friends 8 years ago, so part of my disposable income goes to this. I fully support my jobless sister who lives with me so when she becomes independent, I’d probably have more income freed up.
      I think of using the money for personal development: growing my association further, traveling the world, enrolling in courses, just doing things that make me feel like I am more than a corporate slave.

    • Anonymous

      I think you can always put more in the bank. Most peoples 401K wouldn’t begin to cover the expenses if they were to go to assisted living when elderly. My grandparents literally had more than a million dollars in the bank 15 years ago, and it evaporated so fast when one of them got Alzheimers and needed round the clock care for 10 years. So you probably need a lot more for retirement/end of life than you think you do.
      Other than that, increase your monthly spending – travel more, give more to charity etc as others suggested. Not sure how much you have in your 529 but college is estimated to cost something crazy like $300K soon so unless you have that much saved, put more money in savings accounts in your kids’ names for college.

  7. Pantry cooking/tomatoes

    Trying to cook from my pantry now – what else can I do with s bunch of canned tomatoes, other than chili? Thx!

  8. BillableHours

    How can a corporate litigation associate transition to either a transaction practice or a job in-house, especially if they can’t leverage any partner or client relationships to help with a transition? If I don’t want to do litigation anymore am I just stuck and have to leave law altogether? Would an LLM help? Welcome any ideas and brutally honest assessments.

    • mascot

      What kind of litigation are you doing now and how experienced are you? Why do you want to switch? There are plenty of tedious parts in the corporate world like organizing due diligence or re-drafting a contract for the 20th time. For in-house, I think you could look at risk management or employment counsel positions. If you are doing the litigation side of transactions (contract and business disputes), then you may be able to translate that into some useful knowledge for corporate work.
      If you do regulatory work, I think it is possible to switch from a litigation role to more of a regulatory/corporate role.

    • Killer Kitten Heels

      There are in-house litigation roles at most large corporations, so I think that’d be your most likely exit option (but probably wouldn’t be available to you until year 4+, and more realistically 5+ or 6+, at least based on what I’ve seen in my area).

      The only way I could see an LLM helping is if it was in tax law, and was from a really well-known school (and then afterwards you’d have to practice tax law, so, yeah, not exactly an ideal exit option).

      I know precisely one person who went from a lit associate position to a transactional associate position, and she was only six months into being an attorney and had requested a placement in the transactional group in the first place but been placed in litigation because of firm needs, and she had ties to the industry served by her transactional practice that allowed her to bring in clients for that side of the business. She was widely considered to be a unicorn.

    • January

      An LLM might help you if you wanted to go into trusts & estates work. Firms in my area increasingly seem to be requiring the LLM for that practice.

    • Sydney Bristow

      Don’t get an LLM if you wanted to get one in IP. As far as I know, tax law is the only one worth getting and apparently trusts & estates if January’s area is any indication

    • Emily

      I did it!!! I love it! If you’re willing to put in the time to learn the substance, there may be a firm out there willing to take a chance on you. I practiced for more than 3 years as a litigator and now am several months into a transactional practice and am loving it. It turns out many people have done it (they told me after I told them I was making the change). It may take some legwork to find a department that is hurting for midlevels, but it can be done. You may have to make class year sacrifices and realize you’re going to be a beginner again, but I’ve actually enjoyed being a beginner because it’s not as bad as the first time.

  9. Lasagna

    Pioneer Woman’s Best Lasagna Ever makes use of a few cans of tomatoes and is very “what’s left in the pantry” friendly.

  10. Hiring Timeline

    My husband was asked to interview with a firm. (He had mentioned to a colleague who works at the firm that he was looking to move on from his current position. Colleague recommended him to Boss, who called my husband). That meeting was last Friday (one week ago), and he was told that they’d love to hire him and (figuratively) would have him start on Monday if they could. Boss was going to talk with HR on Monday. On Monday, my husband sends Boss a thank you email for the interview. Boss replies, reiterating what a great meeting it was and they’d like to have him on board.

    My husband hasn’t heard anything sense. How and when can he best check in about status or timeline?

    FWIW, there’s not currently a posted opening. The firm has plenty of work, but they hadn’t yet posted. They did tell my husband that because they receive so much federal funding that they’d have to go through the full equal hiring process (including posting the position), but that they hoped to hire him on contract asap. (My husband is fine with that arrangement and told them so).

    • Ellen

      Yay! Open Thread’s! I love Open thread’s, but am NOT loving the Coveralls (tho the model looks like a slightly LESS attractive version of my sister ROSA).

      As for the OP, relax. It take’s along time to get a government JOB. And b/c it is a federally funded job, they have to interview a lot of LOOSERS b/c they need to keep the funding, even if they don’t wind up hiring those loosers. FOOEY on Government rules! So do NOT fret, but tell him NOT to be shy. If he is any good, he needs to tell them he is interested, and not to let them forget him when the loser’s start comeing in to interview.

      This weekend, Myrna and I am goieng to visit with Myrna’s cousin’s mom (her Aunt) in Upstate NY. Her cousin from the Park’s department will be there. He once wanted to get serius with me but I did NOT like it when he posted my picture in his locker in Central Park. Myrna’s aunt says she has another guy for me, which is awkward b/c her son will be there also. At this point, I will take any guy with a decent job and money in the bank who will become the father to our child and thereafter will NOT demand to much of me and will buy a house for us in Weschester (preferebley Chapaqua) so I can be like ROSA. YAY!!

      • Janice

        Don’t worry about the guy from the parks department. If Myrna’s cousin’s mom has a guy for you, do not hesitate to at least give him a chance. While it may well be that he turns out to be a dud, you never know. On the other hand, he could be great, with a job upstate and money in the bank. If he’s also interested in having kids right away, for all we know, you’ve could have already locked lips (and other body parts) with him in preparation for same! Best of luck to you as you pursue your husband to be!

    • Moonstone

      About two weeks. Time always moves more slowly for the company than the job candidate.

      • Moonstone

        Wait, maybe I said that backwards. What I mean is, it will take longer than the employer thinks to make progress.

  11. Grrr

    Any book recs/blog recs on dealing with difficult people? I need some fresh perspective.

    • Shayla

      Ask a manager, and a bottle of wine. I always tell myself it could be worse, and try to take a deep breath.

    • lsw

      Ugh. I am feeling this today. Our crazy neighbor came over and harangued my SO today for nothing…again.

  12. MSJ

    Need some help finding a cardigan or blazer for a fit and flare dress – this Eileen Fisher one in particular: http://shop.nordstrom.com/s/eileen-fisher-v-neck-jersey-fit-flare-dress-regular-petite-online-only/3935389?cm_mmc=Google_Product_Ads_pla_online-_-datafeed-_-women:dresses:dress-_-1030086&mr:referralID=bf6fd62a-113c-11e5-ba34-001b2166c2c0
    I have it in black and like how it drapes, but I’m looking for something to go over it to make it more office appropriate. Nothing seems to hit right. Thanks!

  13. Anonymous

    Can anyone comment on cost of professional interior painting? We have a 2500 sq foot floorplan, which has been measured to be 6200 square feet of wall space and we’re getting a quote for $11,000 to paint every interior wall (but no ceilings). Is that crazy or in line with what others have paid? Small Midwest city with pretty low cost of living.

    • Jules

      It sounds high but might not be completely insane. I’m also in a small Midwest city — actually, living in a small town outside of it — with low COL. We got a quote last summer to paint the walls and ceiling of our small-ish family room for just under $600, including the cost of Benjamin Moore paint. The room is maybe 11 x 14 but it would have been a tough job because the ceilings are high, the house has old plaster that needed a TON of patching/prep work and there was trim around a window and four doorways with transoms, plus three doors were to be painted. We ended up doing it ourselves because we were on a tight timeframe to get it done and the painter was busy; it took H and I every minute of the weekend from after work on Friday to Sunday night.

      If you do the math and apply this quote just on a per SF basis, it would come close to $11k for house of 2500 SF. However, you aren’t having the ceilings done, and if there is not so much prep work and hassle with doors and transoms and trim, it would be easier to do and should cost less. I would get a second quote.

    • AIMS

      I’d get another estimate to get a feel for a range. I think a large part depends on your walls/space. Do you need skim coating, do you have moldings/fixtures, etc. I should think you can find someone for less, but I’d be sure to talk to them about what you expect.

    • JJ

      It depends on what type of wall space you have. That seems high to me, but if you have clear story walls that are 20+ feet high and require a scaffold, then it might be more reasonable. I would recommend having one or two more painters give you estimates.

    • Anonymous

      Thanks all – will definitely get another quote. We do have 9′ ceilings but no crazy two-story rooms or anything, and just basic crown molding no other molding or fixtures.

    • meme

      I got a quote in a large city in western U.S. for $10,000 for 4250 square feet, 9′ ceilings, ceilings painted too. So I think your quote sounds high.

    • anonymom

      My rule is to get 3 quotes for all home maintenance/improvement jobs unless I have a very good idea of what the cost should be or have a history with the vendor. $11,000 sounds very high to me, especially if ceilings are not included. Are they doing doors, windows, and trim?

    • Ruby

      Lol, I got quotes like this in Seattle a while back and thought they were out of their mind. I refused to paint back then. Circa today: spent half the day with my toddler painting the inside of her treehouse. (house came with it). While I’d have liked someone to especially clean out the spiders and do the painting, well, at the nutso rates people charge, we just did it together and ate a late lunch. I’m a little tired, but used leftover paint from the room I painted (that did take a full day) last summer when I moved in. Wish I had a partner to jump in, or a friend recruit, but I’m at a stage where it’s just sometimes easier and more satisfying to do it myself (sometimes, not all things). A whole house sounds scary though. Here though my girl is sooo excited to now get to color and put stickers all over the inside of her treehouse. And she’ll remember how it got all clean and white. Until she loses her toddler memories. But there was no scheduling someone, appointments, or check paid. For a whole house, I’d try local folks on craigslist or such not companies.

      • Anonymama

        While painting might not seem like a very highly- skilled job, in my experience hiring actual experienced painters is worth it… They are neater, faster, and just do a much better job than amateurs.

    • Anonymou$e

      $250 per month per kid, and then an additional $5k-10k per kid at bonus time. Grandparents contribute maybe $2k per year.

    • Pretty Primadonna

      CRAY! And fascinating. I am reading everything I can about the story and her. And her parents. So many questions…

      • Meg Murry

        Very much odd and crazy. I have good friends that are professors of Africana Studies and my Facebook feed is going crazy with their conversations about it.

      • Wildkitten

        I have a lot of questions about her and her story and her motivations, but absolutely zero questions about her parents. What they did was 100% unnecessarily cause a ton of pain for their daughter and I can think of no explanation that would make that seem like a good idea.

  16. Anon

    Seeking recommendations for a gift for my bridesmaids. I’m hoping to get them and myself bracelets that we could wear both for the wedding and that we’d all wear regularly after the wedding in the $200 range. I definitely want to get something that’s either sterling silver or 14k gold.

    One idea is these Cape Cod bracelets: http://www.capecodjewelers.com/index.php/cape-cod-jewelry-1/cape-cod-bracelets/cape-cod-twist-cuff-bracelet.html. I think this is something we would all get a lot of wear out of, but I’m wondering if it’s too casual for the wedding. I’ll also be wearing a big white gold art deco cocktail ring and diamond stud earrings.

    Another option that I like is this one: http://www.tiffany.com/Shopping/Item.aspx?fromGrid=1&sku=GRP07629&mcat=148204&cid=563632&search_params=p+1-n+10000-c+563632-s+-r+-t+-ni+1-x+-lr+-hr+-ri+-mi+-pp+2274+6&search=0&origin=browse&searchkeyword=. It seems a bit fancier to me and it would pick up a leaf pattern in my dress, but I’m not sure it’s something that any of us would wear too much outside of the wedding.

    Any feedback and ideas appreciated along with any recommendations of bridesmaid gifts that you’ve loved. TIA!

    • Wildkitten

      I don’t think the cape cod bracelet is too casual, but bracelets drive me nuts and I can only wear them on special occasions which I mostly spend taking them off. Are your bridesmaids bracelet people?

    • Bonnie

      I’d avoid the cape cod bracelet because it looks like a David Yurman knockoff. I think bracelets are a great idea but would pick a simple silver bangle or Tiffany’s bead bracelet.

      • Anonymous poser

        Please no bangles– at least I could get a bracelet adjusted. My wrists and hands are so small I can’t wear bangles, pretty as they are.

    • cc

      The odds that all your bridesmaids have the exact same style and will wear it all again is low I think. With a nice price point of 200 dollar I wouldn’t focus on matchy matchy. Shop for them like you would if it was there birthday, and don’t focus on something that they have to wear for the wedding

      • Anonymous

        This. I wouldn’t even spend a lot of money unless you’re sure you know their style well enough to get something you know they’ll like. I spent ~$100 a piece on Coach clutches for my bridesmaids and I don’t think any of them have ever used them again. In retrospect, I should have just gotten them a small momento & then either given them a $100 gift card or paid for their bridesmaid dress, which was about that much. Would have been the same cost to me and much more value to them.

    • nutella

      not sure you are still checking, but trust me as a many-times bridesmaid, the best gift you can give your bridesmaids is to pay for their dresses.

  17. Shopping help?

    I’m looking for a cute yellow sundress, mostly because I like the color and could use a new casual piece to replace some well-worn dresses. I’m looking for something that falls between “casual errands” and “could be dressed up a bit for brunch/dinner out.” Anyone seen any cute options lately? TIA!

  18. Anon

    Part of my job is writing for publication, including writing for my organization’s blogs (both the organization-wide blog and my group’s specific blog). I’m expected to develop my own voice and, really, my own brand. In general, my organization gives me very free rein in this area. They hired me as an expert in my field and so just sort of let me run when it comes to publication. Except. Our group’s blog is edited by the head of our group. His expertise is in something different from mine and we come from different professional backgrounds. I’ve tried writing for the group’s blog a few times and he typically is (1) not really that interested in my work because it’s not his focus (and therefore he doesn’t understand it or why it’s important) and (2) very very heavy-handed with his editing. I had written a few posts awhile back but they never got posted because he sort of lost interest in them and by the time he’d reviewed them (weeks later) they weren’t timely. I just wrote another and now he’s edited it so heavily that it’s wrong in several places, it’s not *exactly* right in others (I’m an attorney, he isn’t, and my words are always very exactly specific — what I say is EXACTLY what I mean — you other lawyers know what I’m talking about), and ultimately it just isn’t my voice. At all. He’s more of a firebrand and that’s his thing. He comes out swinging. That’s not mine. I’m more reserved and circumspect in how I approach things. That’s me, and my voice, and my background (as a lawyer), and my way of approaching my subject area. I’m just not sure how to approach this. He’s not my boss exactly. My boss is in my field and is sort of co-equal to this guy (although this guy is like a 1/4 step above him). So I don’t report to him but he’s still the head of the group and so I don’t want to p–ss him off. I’m not averse to criticism (unlike female scientists, I don’t cry) and I welcome input on how my writing can be better. I mean, he literally re-wrote the actual words in the first half of my post. My words are all gone and his words are there instead. I literally cannot put my name on this. I’m not sure how to tell him this or what suggestion to make. If he dislikes my writing style entirely, there’s not much that I can do. I’m experienced in my field and have a style. Other people like it quite a bit. I don’t HAVE to blog for the group. So if I’m just not fiery enough for him, that’s fine. But it’s unlikely he’ll say “I don’t like your writing; don’t blog.” I’m just not sure what my ask is here.

    • Veronica Mars

      This is tough. I had a similar issue come up. I think the best thing is to start pushing back and see how much ground he’s willing to give. This can either be in person or via email, whichever you think he would respond better to. So, you send a draft, he sends you back edits, and you reject 85-95% of the edits, explaining briefly why in Word comments or in person, and ask for the final go ahead. Some good phrases may be, “legally, we need to word this section as it was originally. Unfortunately, this isn’t a place where we can have a stylistic change because it would be misleading.” “I see that you made some stylistic changes with this section. I’m more comfortable with the paragraph being in my voice. Is there anything specific in the content that you were trying to address?” and keep going from there. He may not feel comfortable in editing your work (if that’s not a regular part of his job or outside of his subject matter knowledge) and feels like he has to put his fingerprints on it. Another option is seeing if you can give him better instructions on what you want him to do, like: “Fergus, I’ve written this blog post about *legal matter* and think that it’s a great fit for our blog. I’ve double-checked that all of the content is worded correctly so we’re not open to liability. Would you mind giving this a once-over to make sure that it’s grammatically correct so I can have it posted by DATE?” Another possible issue is that he might be over-correcting because he isn’t familiar with the area. Is there someone else with authority who you could ask to give a once-over, so he’s just the final round rubber-stamp? That way, you could say, “Bob and I have reviewed and agree it’s ready to go, could you give us the final go-ahead?”

      • Anon

        I think part of the problem is that the blog was actually his own blog before he joined our organization and then it was sort of ported over to us. So it’s “his” blog and he curates very carefully. Seriously, we’ve already gone four rounds of edits on a BLOG post. For the org-wide blog I typically bang one out in an hour or two (maybe more if I realize I need to review an area of law) and post it. It gets a once-over by our blog editor but I’ve never gotten changes back. I’m fine with a few edits but I think he just has this very perfectionist approach and he has a clear idea of what “perfection” means. Honestly I like the guy. He’s brilliant and dedicated and has his heart in the right place. But, man, if you want to write every blog post yourself, write them all yourself! (Also now I will forever think of him as “Fergus.” It suits him far better than his own name.)

        • Meg Murry

          Is there any way to post it to the org wide blog and then just have him put a link on the group blog that says something like “check out todays blog post at our parent org by Jane Smith” ? That way it still goes out to your group audience, but it is clearly written by someone other than him so he doesn’t need to adjust it to match his tone?

    • Anonymous

      I’m not trying to jump all over you but I don’t know what “unlike female scientists, I don’t cry” means. The female scientists I know are tough as nails!! And I know a lot of female attorneys who are big criers. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. Just saying.

      • layered bob

        she’s making a sarcastic joke about Tim Hunt’s idiotic, sexist blather about female scientists.

    • anon

      I have worked as a blog editor. Most experienced editors know that it’s considered stepping over the line to rewrite someone’s piece entirely, change their voice, and change the intended meaning. It’s being published under your name, after all. It’s not like you are writing generic corporate web copy that is not associated with you and can be changed any which way. Your concerns are completely legitimate. I think you should talk to him in person or call him on the phone and explain your points in a calm, even-toned way. Tell him that if he would like something rewritten (beyond fixing grammar and punctuation), for him to point out the problem he’s noticed in a comment through track changes and let you rewrite it yourself if you agree it needs to be changed. For example, he could tell you “the readers may find this section unclear,” ” the opening would be stronger if it expressed a point of view,” etc. That way you’ll receive real editorial feedback and you’ll have a chance to improve the piece while keeping your voice and content intact. I think it’s worthwhile pushing back, but it’s a conversation to have in person, not over email. This sounds like a great opportunity, and it would be sad if it tanked because of his heavy handed editing. This is something that can be negotiated in most cases.

    • Slog

      Lawyer writing often is bland and overly wordy. Maybe he’s just trying to punch it up a bit and make you look good. If you really do admire him, look at the spirit behind his changes and learn from it. If you can’t figure it out, ask. Sure, you have a voice, but it probably can get better. Try not to take it personally, embrace the chance to learn something and improve. But fix the errors! No editor (even a blogger) wants to make things worse!

    • Ruby

      Just don’t blog via this route. Let it go. He’s higher ranked, let it go. I had a somewhat similar situation last week. Press comments for a fairly major regulatory announcement being prepped internally. Non-lawyer friend/boss-like person writes up the draft for the communications people. They whip it up, send it to WSJ etc. ACCKKKKK the words were inaccurate and possibly legally misleading in my view. It drove me nuts. I had the conversation with him because we are close. He said he still liked his words and the message. I said I’m happy to agree to disagree. Fighting over this kind of stuff gets you nowhere. My name wasn’t on it. Had it been, I’d have pulled it. I actually wish I’d said less than I did. Not worth it to the relationships and job status. Who cares.

  19. anon

    Tell Mystal and Lat to stop picking on you or you’ll get their trolls to come after them.

    • PHX

      That’s hysterical. But yeah, guys in my high school re-wrote blog posts all the time; it was no big deal.

  20. toes

    Why do I have 5 toes when shoes would fit so much better if the little one weren’t there? Gaah! Hate swollen summer feet!

  21. Father's Day

    I need to get my dad a file box to carry his important stuff from one home to the other. Mom thinks it should have a lid. I’d like it to be nice enough materials that he could leave it on (or beside) his desk. This is the best I’ve found so far, and I’m not thrilled with it–not sure the wicker can withstand the transport. http://www.target.com/p/nate-berkus-hanging-file-box/-/A-16654871#prodSlot=medium_2_18
    Is there anyone here who’s into office supplies and can help me do better?

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