Splurge Monday’s TPS Report: Long-Sleeve Wool Club Jacket

91 Comments

1. Hi all. I posted last week about my sick 17 year old dog. We put him to sleep yesterday; he improved to almost normal last week that I didn’t buy a ticket to go home because we thought we had more time- they were supposed to be coming up to spend the summer with me in a couple of days. He deteriorated so, so quickly I didn’t get to be there. It was the right choice, so I can let that go. But he was such a huge part of our family and our lives, and I loved him so incredibly much. I’m hurting so badly now I just seems like it’ll never stop. I don’t know what I’m doing here-I just need internet hugs I guess. My baby is gone.

   1. *hugs* I’m so sorry sweetie. Losing a beloved pet is so awful.

   2. That is the worst. I’m so sorry.

   3. I’m so sorry.

   4. I’m so sorry. Losing a beloved pet is just awful.

   5. I am so sorry. Hugs and sympathy.

   6. I am so sorry. I’ve been through this before, and just know that you were blessed to give him a wonderful home, and he thanked you for that by loving you all so unconditionally. hang in there. it gets easier, but it takes a whole hell of a lot of time.

   7. Hugs.

   8. I am so so sorry. We just lost one of our babies a month ago and I felt the exact same way. I cried non-stop for two days straight (and on-and-off for several days after that). I can remember on the second day telling my husband that it hurt so badly and I felt like it would never stop. You don’t stop missing them, but it does get better. I read something recently that made a lot of sense. You should grieve as long as you need to and missing someone never really goes away because they were worth the grief and worth missing. It’s about the value they brought to your life. My baby was worth the grief and your’s is too.

   9. Hugs and love to you. And thank you for giving your buddy the best possible life!

   10. Big hugs to you. They take a little piece of us when they go, so sorry for your loss.

2. Can anyone suggest a good wirefree bra for a bigger bust? I’m a 36G or 36H right now if that helps. Thank you in advance!

   (Going for a fitting later this week, but thought I’d ask here first–you guys always know the best stuff!)

   1. Natori has some great wirefree options for larger busts. They offer surprisingly good support/shaping. Priced starting around $80.

3. Help! I have come to the realization I have super wide toes. For example, even in my Birks, I have to scrunch my toes together so they fit. I went up a size to see if that helped; it didn’t now they’re just flopping all around. Does anyone have recommendations for shoes with a wide toebox?

   1. It depends on the type of shoes. In my experience, Blowfish brand flats tend to have a wider toebox. Not every style does and I can normally figure it out through the reviews on Zappos.

   2. Bjorn.

   3. Did you try your same size, but a wide width?

      1. Yes, and I’m still squished! Stupid feet.

         1. Are you by any chance in NYC? Harry’s Shoes is really great for fit issues.

         2. Your feet are perfect. It is the shoes that are not working. :)

   4. I have a wide toe box as well and it has gotten wider as I have gotten older. I recently bought a shoe stretcher from Amazon, and it works well to make extra room in my shoes. They make them for both heels and flats–check them out!

   5. I have wide feet, especially toe area. I bought two pairs of closed toe shoe from Merrell for work. They are average looking simple shoes. I didn’t love them or anything but my feet are comfortable in them. For summer, I bought a couple of pairs from Clarks in wide widths and they are extremely comfortable and sleek too. Again, I don’t love them, but I would prefer wearing them when the other option is to get my toes squished and sweaty. Next time when I shop for shoes, I want to try ecco.

4. This week is already terrible and we’re only one hour into Monday.

   1. :(

   2. I hear you. Is it Friday yet?

5. Any recommendations for movers in DC? I’m moving 8 blocks away from my current 1 bedroom apartment, into a 2 bedroom, so it’s not a huge move at all. Thanks!

   1. I have used and liked Bookstore Movers.

   2. I had a very good experience with Bookstore Movers.

      Whoever you use, research thoroughly (at least make sure they have a bunch of reviews on yelp). I have friends who had awful experiences when using un-researched movers (stuff broken, lost, belongings held for ransom).

      1. I also had a great experience with Bookstore Movers. We did the packing and they did the moving.

         1. I moved yesterday with Bookstore Movers , and they were good. They only do business via e-mail, which was a bit weird, but it was helpful with handling their thoroughness. The quote request form has a lot of questions, and they e-mail back pretty quickly with additional information. They checked in two days beforehand to see if there were any changes. The only hiccup was that they called asking to come 1.5 hours before my time started; luckily, I had taken the day off. They were efficient, with one guy wrapping/preparing loads while the other two moved stuff to the truck. I appreciated being able to pay via credit card.

   3. I used My Truck Buddy for a very similar move, and they were excellent! Very easy to deal with: reliable, clear, and respectful of me and my belongings. Very reasonably priced too.
      If you search for their name, their webpage should pop right up.

      1. Same here! They showed up exactly when they said they would, were efficient, and took good care of my stuff.

   4. Suburban Solutions- really happy with both moves we used them for. Price super reasonable as well.

      1. I’ve used them twice in NYC and have been extremely happy with them.

   5. I used Casper Movers and was really happy. Efficient, reasonably priced, timely.

   6. Thanks, all! Submitting estimate requests now…

6. For those of you who have lived in the same place for awhile, how do you deal with people constantly coming and going? I live in a major city, and I like it here and plan to stay for awhile, but I end up feeling boring and left behind when every other person is leaving. I think this is probably just unique to my social circle, since I get the sense a lot of people move to my city, but it seems like so many come for a few years in their twenties and then leave to settle elsewhere.

   I’m not even sure what I’m asking. I don’t want to move and I’m committed to my job, community, friends and family here, but sometimes I wonder if I’m the only one that doesn’t want to move all over the place!

   1. I live in a city like that and I really value the very small group that isn’t planning to move back home. But I also figure I am the exciting one and the people who leave are the boring ones.

   2. I don’t even live in an “exciting” city and I’m going through a bit of this as well (though in my case, I think people are leaving for greener pastures). I’m pretty well settled here, and I understand that my friends who are leaving have good reasons for doing so (moving closer to family, exciting professional opportunities), but I know – it’s no fun to be the one left behind, so to speak.

      I guess that’s not advice, but you’re definitely not the only one in this boat.

   3. I live in a transient city too, and honestly I just don’t get close to people who are in the transient bucket. If someone just moved here, I’ll be nice but I won’t get too deep in the friendship unless it seems they’re likely to stay. As a result, my friends have become people who are invested in staying here.

      1. Your well-being is important, but please understand that some transient people leave smaller cities because there are few transient people to socialize with, and locals are often stand-offish for the reasons you stated. The behavior you describe is part of the reason why I left a Midwestern city that is not Chicago. Many locals were nice, but only superficially, and not that interested in letting newcomers in.

         1. Oh I’m certain that makes it tough for people to move to new places. I actually live in a big city (SF) so there’s a large transient population here too, which probably makes it an easier place to come to from somewhere else. That said, that’s not my excuse for not befriending transient friends – it just sucks becoming close to people and having them move away and after that happened a few times, I started really paying attention to whether people seemed invested in living here or not, and befriending the former. There’s always so much discussion about moving for jobs and people think it’s easy/no big deal and talk a lot about how hard it is to make friends as adults and I think this is part of the reason. I could be dishonest and pretend that people’s personal mobility doesn’t factor into how I decide to befriend them, but that wouldn’t really help anyone make an informed decision about the realities of moving.

         2. I agree with what anon says. And sometimes people are transient not out of choice but circumstance.

            1. Just to be clear, I don’t disagree with anon either – I think it’s definitely a reason locals, including myself, are probably seen as standoffish. I’m just responding to the OP “how do I deal with this” question by saying what’s worked for me (not really befriending transients in the same way I would someone who’s planning to stay where I am) and that it’s something to think about before you voluntarily move. I think there’s a lot more to life than getting ahead at work and that people should really factor in whether they’ll easily have friends and be able to make a life in a new place and this is a big part of the equation.

   4. My best friend is getting ready to leave for law school, so I know this feeling. It’s hard. But talking to people when I visit friends in other cities – SF, LA, Philly, NYC – it seems like it’s a thing in big cities in general.

   5. It’s a function of age. That happened to me in my late 20s. By my 30s, people had married and settled down — either back where they (or the spouse) came from, or here. It sucks while it’s happening but it all settles down eventually.

      1. I agree. This is exactly like how, at various points in your life, you are attending 8 weddings in one summer or (a few years later) baby showers every third weekend.

7. I know the feeling! For me, it’s a little bit of sadness that that part of my life is over and a little bit of worry that I’m not “leaning in” by seeking out new jobs, etc.

   But then I think about what a hassle it is to move and how glad I am that I am not moving. Finding a new place to live, new dry cleaner, ugh and I have so many books to move. This works particularly well when it’s a very hot and sticky day outside.

8. I think that as the jacket looks on the model, it would minimize my bust, elongate my torso, and add some umph to my midsection. No thank you. It is hard enough being a pear without something stretching you out so that you look like a gourd.

   1. I’m not a pear but this style of jacket has never worked for me. It looks great though on tall slim types.

9. Have any of you ladies left law and gone into HR? If so, do you regret it and how did you transition?

   I’m considering leaving law; I’ve been at my current firm for 2 years. It’s a small firm and while I like it and the practice area I don’t know that I want to practice law in the traditional sense for the rest of my life. My job also has an end date. I don’t want to go into it but I would be able to continue working at my current firm 3 years from now due to changing dynamics.

   I’m thinking of taking a lower HR position and then working for a while and getting a masters in HR or the HR certification with the idea of when I have that experience I’ll be able to transition to a higher level HR role. Ideally, eventually, head of HR at a start up.

   It would be a pay cut for now but I’m wondering if the long term satisfaction would be worth it.

   I really appreciate all insights and comments. Thanks!

   1. Let me preface this by saying I’m neither a lawyer nor in HR….I think unless you’re very lucky it’s not a rewarding job. Most HR jobs are not about helping the employee find their niche. Mostly you work for management. If there are conflicts, you’re on management’s side. You’ll do a lot of firing and a lot of censoring of employees or putting them in probabtionary periods.

      I do have one friend who lucked out and gets to work with employees to enrich them, but most HR jobs are really personnel jobs….

   2. The lawyers I’ve seen be happy with this came from an employment background and started much closer to the top- HR director or SVP level roles. In my experience, a certification or HR masters isn’t necessary.

      1. Agreed. The natural switch to HR goes with employment law and is typically at a high level. That said, I’ve known junior lawyers in unrelated practice areas to “start over” in HR but with adjusted expectations (e.g. you have the same chance of running the department/becoming an exec as a non-lawyer and don’t get to jump steps because the background isn’t particularly relevant),

   3. I agree. Don’t start at a low level. No master’s needed. You could work on the certification now before making the leap but I’m not even sure you would put it on your resume as you want to be able to bypass the lower tiers of HR to leverage your legal skills. Perhaps you could look for in-house job first and find a role that encompasses HR. Another idea would be to start going to your local Society for HR Professionals – I believe that they are the ones that administer the exam also.

      1. +1 – Also consider what type of HR you want to do. Benefits focused? Talent Acquisition? Setting internal policies? Do some informational interviewing about title, duties and advancement opportunities. I have found job titles do not have consistent duties across companies, so be aware of that.

      2. Agree on getting some exposure to HR through an in-house position or switching to your firm’s employment law practice group. At smaller companies, you should be able to get involved in certain compensation and employee benefits discussions as an attorney.

   4. HR is soul sucking. You bend labor law and manipulate employees. Especially in start ups you squeeze employees for all they are worth. You won’t get the happy ethical socially conscious image of HR

      1. Agreed. The HR people I knew had to go over really dull benefits information with employees, deal with ridiculous conflicts (x manager was sleeping with y employee and then y employee got promoted and her department freaked out and complained). Your job is to protect the status quo and to fire people. I think the higher you get, the more it’s your job to handle difficult conversations and fire people (I’m speaking as someone who worked for a startup that just went public). I think some people go into HR because they think it’s the “people side” of business, but it’s not really a great place to be from what I’ve seen. The talent acquisition side might be better though.

   5. .

   6. You are so smart to be thinking about this now and laying the groundwork for a successful transition.

10. its so far out of my comfortzone, I need some affirmation. Heading to SFO this week for work. It looks cool enough to wear sweaters/etc. I’m from a warmer climate, where it’s clearly HOT here (shorts, sundresses, etc.). Would I be out of place wearing boots in SFO in June?

    1. Nope. But it’s not that cold. Definitely sweater/fleece/scarf weather but it’s on the mild side. You’ll see people in boots but ballet flats will feel fine too.

    2. Yes. It’s going to be in the high 60s. Not boots weather at all. Perfect weather for the wearing of normal shoes, suits, etc. bring a scarf.

       1. LOL. In New Orleans, anything in the 60s is boots weather.

    3. The city of SF can get very cold in the summertime. It often depends on which neighborhood you’ll be in. The southeastern parts of the city – South of Market, the Mission, Potrero Hill – can be warmer and sunnier. The western parts much colder, foggier, and windier. When I lived in SF I usually wore a wool coat through the entire summer. I never wore shorts there, and rarely wore a dress without tights. It’s hard to fathom coming from the heat of the east coast, but packing a real coat, scarf, boots, and pants will save you money from having to buy them when you’re there.

11. recomendations on what to wear to LA? Is it a maxi dress type city? Going for a training that I think will be casual (i think skinny jeans are ok) I feel like I am very east coast so would love some general tips

    1. It depends on your industry/the type of training, but in general, yes, people wear maxi dresses here. Another common default I’ve seen in a pretty wide range of industries is nice jeans, flowy blouse, and a blazer.

    2. Maxi dresses are worn a lot here, but in a casual, social setting. I never see them for work. I’d go for skinny jeans and a nice top, with blazer as optional for wamth. Casual jacket would also be OK, as would a more casual, short work-ish dress.

       Sunglasses are key, and are worn with everything from formal suits to bikinis.

    3. Generally, more color, less black, more patterns.

    4. I don’t usually see people wearing maxi dresses at work around here (exception: pregnant ladies); skinny jeans and cute top would probably be what most people wear.

       That said… it’s LA, do what you want! I grew up on the East Coast and moved out here several years ago; I work in a fairly conservative industry (not creative) but people are still pretty expressive with their clothes. Wear something you like and will be comfortable in – there are people here who spend a lot of time and energy trying to stand out from the crowd; it’s very hard to accidentally stand out around here.

12. Following the underwire-free question above, does anyone have any suggestions for sport bikinis for large busts? Title Nine only goes up to DD cup, and I’m an E/F, and honestly, their patterns for the Bodylicious collection are kind of fug. I’m looking for the kind of bikini top that basically looks like a sportsbra, so it won’t jiggle and nothing will fall out when I body surf and mess around in the pool. Tankinis don’t work for my body, unfortunately. I have bra-sized bikinis that fit fine, but they all look like bras, and I’m always worried about the girls popping out. Anyone have suggestions, or should I just bite the bullet and get a tight rash guard?

    1. I don’t know if they have much in the way of “sport” bikinis, but 34G/H here and I’ve been really happy with the bikini tops I’ve gotten from figleaves.com. They may not have style you’re looking for, but it’s worth checking out. Even with the halter styles that I’ve gotten, I’ve never worried about popping out.

    2. Would a one piece work?

       http://www.bravissimo.com/m/#products/swimwear/swimsuits/premiere-ultimate-silver-sports-swimsuit/navy/so103nvy/

       1. I’ve found lots of bra-sized one-pieces, but I’m tired of feeling frumpy. Thanks, though.

          1. http://m.figleaves.com/uk/product/FBF-AS3992/Active-Swim-Underwired-Crop-Top/?productColourId=727326

    3. Freya goes up to a K cup and has some nice options.

13. I think this has been asked before, but I couldn’t find it. BR Sloan ankle pants – anyone machine washed them?

    1. Yes – on cold – hung to dry – shrunk over an inch. Boo.

    2. Yes, with no ill effects.

    3. My safest approach has been to use Dryel several times between rare dry cleanings.

    4. Yes, because it wasn’t until someone asked this question on here that I realized they weren’t, in fact, machine washable. Oops.

       That being said, they are definitely tighter after I wash (cold, hang dry) than before, but otherwise, no issues.

14. My SO knocked my bottle of foundation into the sink and it broke. It was probably time to be replaced anyway – I don’t wear foundation every day and it was kinda old. Anyway, I feel like it’s an opportunity to try out a new foundation! I was previously using Lancome Teint Idole 24H. I’d like to use something slightly more moisturizing. I do love Dior Hydra Life BB Cream, but it’s a bit orange for me on its own so I blend it with foundation. Any recommendations for moisturizing foundations? Preferably with SPF? I’m pretty pale, too, so foundations that go light are helpful.

    1. What about Lancome’s Teint Miracle foundation? I’m super pale and use the Ivoire. It’s pretty moisturizing as well.

    2. You might like Bare Minerals Complexion Rescue. I find it to be very hydrating and nice coverage, not too heavy.

    3. No7 Superlight if you can get it where you are. It’s supposedly very similar to the Chanel Vitalumiere Aqua (I think I’ve remembered the name correctly). It only has SPF 15, so not enough if you’re outside all day, but it’s fantastic other than that.

    4. YSL Le Touche Eclat Foundation gives you an amazing, ethereal glow.

    5. I am very pale, but I hate foundation. I just use Maybelline BB cream. It has SPF 30!

       1. I’m a Maybelline BB cream fan, also.

    6. thanks all! off to sephora for some samples.

    7. Probably too late, but MAC has the prep+prime BB cream and another one that’s a CC (I think?) that’s supposed to be brightening. Both are light and moisturizing and come in extra light (my color as well.

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