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Wednesday’s Workwear Report: Wool-Blend Pencil Skirt

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A woman wearing black pumps, a dark brown/maroon midi skirt, and printed blouse

Our daily workwear reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices.

I saw a woman a few weeks ago wearing a skirt this color with a coordinating top, and I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it. We’ve talked about wearing a “column of color” to make an outfit look more pulled together, and this lady was really making it work. I’m tempted to grab this Lauren Ralph Lauren skirt and find a silky blouse in a similar color to see if I can pull it off. 

The skirt is $195 at Nordstrom and comes in sizes 0-16. 

This Universal Standard skirt, though in a different style, is a very similar shade and is available in 4XS-4XL for $98.

Sales of note for 2/6:

217 Comments

  1. Anyone dress a lot more formally than the rest of their office? I wear a solid color sheath dress with sleeves (and sometimes pockets) every day. Color varies, length varies (knee to midi), shoe choice varies. The rest of my firm wears the equivalent of kakhis/Dockers/jeans and a polo daily, other than younger women who wear cropped cardigans and wide leg Docker looking pants. I do not want a new wardrobe, and I hate finding pants that fit. I am noticing I am more formal than others. I am in a leadership role, early 40s. Anything bad about this?

    2. If you don’t want to change what you’re doing, and you don’t want a new wardrobe, then it sounds like you’re fine. (However, I would point out that you were concerned enough to post a question on the internet, so how you’re dressing caught your attention, for some reason. Pay attention to how concerned you are and add in 1 or 2 more casual outfits if you want to. They don’t have to include pants — they could be a less-formal midi dress and boots.)

    3. if you’re concerned that you’re seen as unapproachable, rigid, or out of touch, worth considering. But it’s not odd that a manager would dress more formally than their team.

      1. Agree with this – it is entirely possible that the more junior women at work are thinking you look like a boss lady and taking notes for their own futures.

        I’m C-suite, with a female CEO, and you better believe I take notes on how she dresses!

      2. Exactly what I was thinking. Being seen as stuck up and unapproachable is the only possible issue I could think of, and you’re just as likely to come off as extra put together and conscientious if you’re “overdressed”.

        1. I once worked for a woman who over dressed and was uh very non personable. It all came to a head when she had a meltdown we didn’t invite her to casual after work drinks.

          1. This isn’t the flex you think this is. It sounds very middle school mean girl on your part and nothing to do with what she did or didn’t wear.

          2. Your subordinates are not required to spend their personal time with you if you’re a B. Sorry, thems the breaks.

    4. Meh, if it isn’t broken, why fix it? You’re in a leadership role, and you’re in your 40s.

    5. Are you having trouble connecting with people in the way that you need to for your role? I.e., do you think you come across as too aloof and out of touch to have good working relationships with your peers or junior staff? Or do you feel like if you don’t dress formally you won’t be taken seriously by leadership?

      If none of this is the case, then rock your current wardrobe and don’t worry about it.

    6. I have been wearing more casual shoes with my work dresses and that helps: loafers instead of kittens. I would also suggest that when you do
      need something new, you think about adding a classic shirt dress. Those match chinos in level of formality.

    7. IME senior people dress more formally than most team members and it isn’t an issue. The senior folks meet with clients or executives regularly, they have the budget to purchase and dry clean formal clothes, and they probably bought those items before offices became more casual. No one thinks anything of it. Unless you notice a weird dynamic (like you’re the stiletto-clad lady barking orders at a warehouse team) no need to change your wardrobe.

    8. I think it’s fine as long as you keep the styles current and the dresses fit you well. If they are too loose or too tight or are bright Fox News anchor colors, then you will look dated and irrelevant.

      1. Nothing about sheath dresses ever sounds current to me. YMMV but to me they’re the height of dated and stuffy.

    10. Nothing bad per se as leadership tends to dress a bit more formal. If you are looking to keep the formality but add in some updates, I’d look towards how to make more separates happen instead of just dresses, and maybe mix in some jeans Fridays. As a fellow hater of shopping for pants, I’ve added a bunch of midi length skirts to the mix in the place of pants.

    11. I’d keep the dresses and consider updating the styling. Like if you are also wearing pearl earrings, nude hose, and heels maybe update and wear boots with your dresses or more modern jewelry.

  2. If you volunteer for a nonprofit, other than board service or for a school, what do you do? How often? How did you get plugged in? How long have you volunteered there and how much longer donyou think you will?

    1. I volunteer with a local sustainability organisation – we do a big town reuse festival once a year, and smaller events throughout the year. This was my 4th year – we’re moving soon but I’ve promised to come back b/c I’m really good at the day-of setup and planning.

      I love the physical and social dimension – and have resisted requests to join the board. I’d much rather be unpacking boxes, setting up book displays, and helping match people with the items they want/need at our big events. I like my fellow volunteers, I like (most – there are always people who are grabby or demanding) of our “customers”, and I think modelling the real-world volunteering for my kid is really important. This year, my husband and I both took the day off to coordinate set-up, and just had a blast.

      1. I have found as a knowledge worker whose brain is often drained after a day of decisions, I am also drawn to hands on, physical types of volunteering activities, and also resisted getting involved at the board level. At this point in my life, I don’t need any more hard problems to help solve, except to determine how fast I can fill a pallet of food boxes for the local pantry.

    2. I volunteer sporadically with a food pantry, both helping stock and doing some grants writing/ review.

      I am also a rower and I volunteer in the spring and summer with an adaptive rowing team – I got once a week for practice and I am usually rowing with an adoptive athlete or I am helping out around the boat house

    3. I volunteer for Big Brothers Big Sisters. I’ve been a big for almost 10 years, my Little is aging out of the program next year. I’d like to continue to be in my Little’s life and help with her transition to college. It’s a big change to get a new Little and build the relationship from scratch. I’ll do it again eventually, but maybe not right away. I joined because I wanted a deeper connection to the community (which I had just transplanted to) and I certainly got that. My Little’s family took me in and treat me like their own. We do activities all over the area and I’ve built relationships with other Bigs. I highly recommend the whole experience.

      I also volunteer monthly in the kitchen at a homeless shelter in my city. It started because my Little needed volunteer hours for school. We go once a month and make sandwiches and pack lunch bags. It’s a good time! I’ll probably keep going after my Little goes off to college.

    4. Once a month with Junior League and then sporadically (maybe 4 times a year) at a local childrens hospital through a Catholic charity. I’ve been doing the childrens hospital volunteering for about 7 years and Junior League for about 5. I hope to keep volunteering indefinitely, but I imagine it might stop for awhile when I have kids (hopefully in a few years).

    5. Once or twice per year, I volunteer to work the local Friends of the Library book sale. The regular volunteer work, sorting donations, happens on Tuesday and Thursday afternoons. But for the actual book sale, they need extra people to straighten and restock tables.

      1. Are you me? I do this too, although I missed the last sale in Dec and feel bad about it. Great group, and a good reminder to me to get back on the calendar!

    6. I volunteer probably once a quarter at our local food pantry (but ideally would like to volunteer more). I have been volunteering there for three years, and will probably volunteer at the pantry for as long as I live in the town.

    7. Scouts, through my kids. Otherwise, I had no brothers and they just opened up to girls, so it was never on my list but it has been a delightful ride. I love weekend camping as I am happy outside and don’t have any home chores while away. It’s been delightful to see a lot of young men and women grow up and some kids are in high school or college now. Despite the news, I feel that we will be OK. These are great kids, doing some great things, with a heart for service and a love of both nature and their communities.

    8. In an entirely privileged answer, my checkbook does the volunteering as it has a much bigger impact than my showing up for 20 hours a year.

    9. Twice a month (approximately) for three hours a session at a food bank for refugee communities that my church supports – which has the advantage of allowing flexibility since we can switch shifts if travel or work plans interfere while still maintaining consistency. I also volunteer two Sundays a month and for special services (mostly funerals) at my church, but since that supports my own church community, I do not really consider that “volunteering” except for the funerals.

      But I am also self-aware enough to know that in my case my money does more than my labor.

    10. I volunteer for our local showcase house of design. Once a year we take over a big house, have designers re-do it (one designer per room), then charge admission for the public to come and look. It’s open for a month and it takes several months to get it ready. Every member of the organization is required to do ten four-hour shifts at the house when it’s open — taking tickets, directing traffic, and so on. There is also committee work, including staffing, parking, permits, designer coordination, and so on. Outside of the house project itself, we spend the money we raise on music and music education in the community, and I am on the Gifts and Grants committee that evaluates applications and awards the money. Finally, we put on events like an instrumental music competition and there is all kinds of volunteer work associated with that. It’s been great and I’ve made a lot of good friends. This will be my fourth year. I liked it so much that my husband joined a year after I did, and now it’s something we do together.

      1. I also do one-off projects with my Rotary Club, like painting the Ronald McDonald House or passing out supplies for victims of last year’s fires. And I’m the chair of a big annual project we do to honor teachers in our public schools. This is my third year doing the teacher project and I will step down after this year.

    11. I volunteer with an organization that registers people to vote and does other sorts of voter registration outreach. Have been doing for 3 years, and it is sporadic when events are organized, with many events (multiple times a month) closer to election months. I also volunteer at a local Hospice organization, that also rotates in frequency, depending upon the patient I am following. And I follow each patient to the end.

      I would like to get into more volunteering on the education front, likely teaching English to adults or helping young children learn how to read.

  3. What’s the best decongestant when you literally can’t breathe out of your nose at all for days? DayQuil and Nyqil did nothing.

    1. I should add that those drugs are expensive so we don’t tend to keep a huge supply of options.

    2. Spray Afrin. But ONLY use it for no more than 3 days — the rebound effect is real. But when you need a nostril, it works!

      1. +1 if you just need to push through something, it’s the only thing that truly makes me seem not sick. But if I use it more than a few days, I start to get nosebleeds.

        Also / otherwise, real Sudafed from behind the counter.

        1. there’s also a rebound effect where the more you use it the more problems you have…

          i like to think Afrin gives your sinuses a day or two to try to regulate themselves… i always encourage my kids to take hot showers and enjoy at least a few minutes of free breathing.

    3. You need an actual decongestant, like the pseudoephedrine they sell behind the counter or afrin, though like the other poster said, you can only use this for a few days.

    4. If you are congested, spicy food or warm liquids (soups, teas) + something like Mucinex + staying REALLY hydrated.

      If you are stuffy, like your nose feels engorged internally, I feel a shower and possibly an allergy med can help with that (antihistamine), but that can be drying so you have to know what you are treating.

      Also possibly helpful but it may feel like self-waterboarding at first: the Neti-pot brand squeeze bottle. Be sure to use distilled water and the salt/soda packets to keep it from irritating your nose.

      1. +1000 to the neti pot. ONLY USE DISTILLED WATER. My prescription: one pyrex cup of distilled water, heated in microwave for 37 seconds. Pour in one packet of the prepared saline, stir. Pour half into the neti pot, do one nostril, blow out all the gunk, and repeat on the other side. I do this daily in the winter to prevent situations, but when one gets through, up to 3 times a day. This provides the most instant relief of anything I’ve ever done when I am really congested, and my once yearly sinus infections are a thing of the past.

          1. Some people don’t wait for it to cool enough. Room temp distilled water for the win.

          2. You can, but then waiting until it cools to the right window of temperature so that it dissolves the salt but doesn’t burn your nostrils is more work than I care to do. I’m done in under two minutes.

    5. Take the fight directly to your nose! Hot shower + neti pot, followed by Flonase. Both morning and night if necessary.

      1. Hot shower, neti pot, flonase and sudafed will help within 1-2 days in my experience.
        Just an FYI that I would NOT combine Mucinex D with sudafed, especially if you’re prone to depression/sensitive to caffeine. It triggered horrible panic attacks/hallucinations for me.

    6. Pseudoephedrine (the stuff you have to buy directly from the pharmacist) works for me. But, the side effects were too much last time I took it round the clock for days. I think I’ll save it for nights next time.

    7. For symptoms, real Sudafed or nose spray.

      Mucinex (or the generic) + lots of water will help break it up.

    11. I like the Mucinex + pseudoephedrine, but the nasal sprays are also good for immediate relief. I hope you get better soon. That version of sick is miserable for me.

    12. Sudafed is the answer. You might also try a humidifier at night. I also eat all of the spicy foods to help break things up.

      If it goes too long, see your doctor. Something you think is mild can turn into a chronic sinus infection that needs antibiotics.

    14. Antihistamine if your nose itself is swollen shut, decongestant if instead it’s clogged with crud. Both if both.

    15. Dayquil and Nyquil are useless for me. I’ve had success with saline nasal spray and flonase. Saline won’t be a magic cure once you’re congested (but it will help), but it was really help for me as a preventative. I started using saline nasal spray regularly a few years ago and my chronic congestion went away. Agree that Afrin also works once you’re already congested, but like other posters have said, you MUST heed the warnings re: how long to use. Mucinex is also effective.

    18. Zyrtec D. You don’t need a prescription but they generally keep it behind the counter at the drugstore. That stuff is magic.

    19. Mucinex D extra strength. The kind that you have to get from behind the counter at the pharmacy and show your ID. It’s the only thing that works for me.

  4. I have inherited an impressive collection of slide rules. Are there any good resources for learning how they work? I know that they are on a log scale and are somewhat approximate vs the precision of a calculator or excel. But apparently they got men to the moon (and would have been what the Hidden Figures women used). I’m up for trying but my google has not revealed things that are understandable by me (and I’m pretty good at up to AB level calculus, but only use finance bro math at work).

    4. You should come over to my mother’s house! She loves her slide rule and is slightly dismayed that I graduated with an engineering degree without ever learning how to use one. But honestly – just post on your community’s Facebook group, I’m sure there’s a retired engineer in their 60s or 70s who would LOVE to teach you.

      1. Actually, your Facebook suggestion is a great idea. I agree that a retiree would be thrilled.

      2. Same. My mother kept trying to teach me to use a slide rule before, during, and after I earned my hard science degree.

    6. MIT has a nice, brief summary with an example of how to use one to multiply 3×2. If you follow along with the steps, you can run a few trials of your own to get some experience with the tool.

    7. I’ve never thought of learning to use them! Thank you for the idea! A lot of engineers in my family so I have them as well

  5. Why am I getting a pop up alert that “corporette.com wants to look for and connect to any device on my local network” today?

  6. It’s disgusting to watch Trump stand up at Davos saying that NATO has done ‘nothing’ for the US in the face of Article 5 only ever being invoked in support of the US. Plus Denmark having the highest casualty rate per capita because they were sent to Helmand. It’s going to be multi- generational to repair this damage.

    He’s such a poor excuse for a human being.

    1. +1,000,000. As well as what this says to Canada which served in Kandahar. I really wonder how active duty service members are feeling about his crass insults of the foreign service members who worked alongside us in Afghanistan, as well as the threats to break up military alliances that we have trained with and planned to work with against global threats. I can’t imagine going it alone is an appealing thought.

    2. While I do think that I’m glossing over the W Bush administration in my recollection (mission accomplished, I guess), Trump manages to be way, way more damaging. There was a joke petition over the weekend about Denmark annexing California and honestly, fine. We’d get better education funding and national healthcare.

    4. Agreed. So many allies mobilizing against us. It’s going to take a long time to recover.

    5. I and every sane European works hard to distinguish between the current administration and the American people, but we are angry and appalled by Trumps actions and genuinely sad about the break down in the relationship between our countries. Being a tiny country we will have to be pragmatic in some ways, but the trust is gone

  7. Any Davidson people here? Is there a good campus dive to visit there? Not fine dining but something that is where the kids go that is good and not expensive?

    1. Not sure where the kids go but there’s an old fashioned soda shop/diner on the main street right by campus that’s pretty good. It’s literally called “Davidson Soda Shop.”

    2. I went to college there but graduated 20 years ago.
      – The Soda Shop is fun and nostalgic, and the food was decent.
      – The Brickhouse was one of our go-tos. My husband loved their chicken parmesan (though of course there’s no guarantee that it would be the same).
      – Summit Coffee Shop is the heart of the town and has amazing coffee. I’ve been to their Asheville location in recent years, and I’m confident in saying that it’s still good.

      I don’t think you’re going to find too many real “dives” in Davidson itself. It’s a very expensive town, with a very active town planning commission. And at least when I was a student, most students had meal plans with campus dining or with their fraternity or eating house. When we did go out–except for parents’ weekend–we usually ate at cheaper places in nearby towns (fast food, Waffle House, Chinese buffet, cheap Mexican), or at Joels Asian Grill, which has relocated to Mooresville and has terrible reviews now, though I will always be nostalgic for their fried rice.

  8. I’m going through a pretty terrible time: my stepdad (who I’m very close with) was just put on hospice after battling cancer for years, I had a breakup last month, and my agency is in the midst of 50% layoffs (with no reduction in work!).

    I’m an emotional eater … but I also have a chronic GI condition that’s worsened by stress so I can’t eat. As in, I’m lucky to be able to choke down one meal a day. Normally, popping out for a snack or coffee helps my morale during the day but that’s a no go right now because of my GI problems.

    What are your recommendations for a little pick me up when things are tough? It’s also absolutely freezing so a quick walk isn’t a great solution either. Obviously not trying to spend a lot re: layoffs.

    FWIW, I’m in therapy and on anxiety/depression meds. I prioritize sleep. I make sure the meals I can eat are nutritious. I workout 6x a week. I have a great support system family (who are also grieving), friends, and work family (who are also impacted by layoffs).

    I feel like I’m doing okay as I can for the “big” stuff/emotions. I just don’t have a great framework for a pick me up for emotions in the moment.

    2. This may be weird but is there an art museum near your office? I used to love popping over to the Portrait Gallery at lunch just to feel like I was on a tiny vacation. Either that or a mall/department store could be fun for browsing. Otherwise just meeting a friend for coffee (even if you don’t actually drink a coffee) can be a nice refresh.

    4. A freezing walk might be exactly what you need. Wear a warm coat, a hat, and gloves and enjoy the bracing clarity you get from the cold temps. Get outside every day and you will feel a little better.

      1. And for myself, a good cemetery walk is even better when I’m dealing with big stuff like deaths and breakups. It puts things in perspective, lets me wallow in my emotions dramatically without bothering anyone else. If you need to have a good cry no one will bother you. And there’s usually a good amount of wildlife, if it’s an old enough cemetery.

        1. I can’t emotionally handle a cemetery right now.

          Might be good perspective for non life and death situations but I’m staring down the imminent death of a loved one.

          1. No worries, I figured this could be a real non-starter with a lot of people, but worth offering on the off chance you were someone who would like it. No one right way to grieve.

        2. Same here. It’s been helpful to be reminded that the nature of life involves death, dealing with my partner’s terminal illness.

        3. OP and anonymous, I’m sending moral support, internet hugs (If you want them), and deep wishes that you find moments of calm while (and after) your loved ones face their terminal illnesses. I’ve been where you are. It’s not easy.

    6. This is a little art-school exercise that I sometimes use for a mental reset – which is a short walk (5 minutes around the block works), with the addition: when you first step outside, pick an item that catches your eye – don’t think too hard about this. Then pick an attribute of that item (item: the junk mail ads on my porch; attribute: red color; or item: the big cottonwood; attribute: rough texture in the bark). Then look for the next thing you can see with the same attribute (where’s the next bit of red on the block? the next rough textured thing?) Walk to it, and then to next, and then to next, just following that attribute throughout your walk.

    7. Assuming it doesn’t make your condition worse, matzo ball soup preferably from a deli. That’s my go to for when I need a meal to give me a hug.

    8. A simple at-home manicure/pedicure — it’s a slowish process, has a small payoff, and has low stakes. I’ve found it to be a good activity for when I need a bit of a pause anda bit of brightness.

    9. Going to get my nails done + a good podcast or book to listen to or just silence if you need a break.

      Also, it’s entirely fine if things are just tough and to be sad about it for a while. It’ll get better eventually and in the mean times, doing more may not help.

      1. + 1 million to the last paragraph. Sometimes things just stink and it’s not a sign of weakness if you can’t force yourself to power through after a quick pick-me-up. Kate Bowler is a good anti-toxic-positivity author if you want something to read along those lines.

    10. Cup of Jo just had a column about the five little things she is doing to help her in the face of a breakup. Not equating that to all you have going on, but her ideas, and those in the comments, were good enough that I sent to my 29 year old also about two weeks out from a breakup. Little things can provide just a temporary glimpse that life will be beautiful again.

    11. This is personal to me, but I think would help many – I really do best when I make time for something creative. Making music (choir for me), crafts, photography, cooking something I enjoy, etc. taps into a different part of my brain that is distracting and relaxing. If there’s something in that vein that excites you, I’d try and make room for it a few minutes a day – would also be something to look forward to!

    12. A couple of free or low cost options that have worked for me are short guided meditations (10 minutes is the sweet spot for me). As a Kaiser member, I get the Calm app for free, but have also used some from YouTube. 2025 was stressful, and I started getting back into painting my nails. The ritual was really de-stressing, and as I got more into it (Reddit Laqueristas, no C), I learned that it helps many others as well.

      Also, if you have a bathtub, there’s nothing like a good soak to relax a bit.

      Hugs OP.

    13. Are you a reader? Maybe something very low-stress/silly/rom-com to take your mind off things. I like historical romances for this and they are usually readily available from my library/libby. Similarly – crafting + audiobook, something like woobles or adult coloring/markers.

      Check out some Trader Joes skincare items, they have a lip mask that is supposed to be a Laneige dupe and some great hand cream

  9. What’s your favorite book available on Project Gutenberg, i.e. old and out of copyright?

    2. Interesting question! Of books I recall personally reading on Gutenberg and not in library hardback, what came to mind was either Charles Williams’ Descent Into Hell (only on Australian Project Gutenberg apparently!) or Wired Love by Ella Cheever Thayer.

      Other free domain books: Tristram Shandy; Joseph Conrad, Charles Dickens, or Jane Austen novels; or the old Constance Garnet translations of Dostoevsky.

    3. Mountains of Madness was really memorable and not what I was expecting from my stereotype of Lovecraft.

    4. A Girl of the Limberlost. The Anne of Avonlea series, LM Montgomery. Little Women series, Louisa May Alcott.

      1. Oh I recently caught up on some LM Montgomery I hadn’t read before and enjoyed the Blue Castle.

    6. I read all of Frances Burney on there recently. Evelyna is a great start but Cecilia was my favorite. Don’t be intimidated by the length!

      Project Gutenberg is my absolutely favorite thing on the internet.

  10. The world has gotten so bleak that I am paying attention to the Brooklyn Beckham family feud. My uninformed hot take is that when you marry up, you can be a drama llama towards your self-made family of birth. I do not believe for a minute that he is a chef. If he is a chef, I am Julia Child. I remember that there was a lot of wedding drama. And I am not sure any parties here can script out an open letter that long, so I am wondering: did AI write that? A publicist? Am I bad for thinking that young kids like this really could not pull off the written work product?

    1. Team No One in the fight between publicity hungry millionaire parents and Trump supporting billionaire parents but I do find the timing suspicious. The wedding was years ago and it’s coming out now? Just grey rock them if they find his parents so problematic.

      His wife had a movie announcement recently that got like no press so this letter feels like an attention grab. I can’t be bothered to IMDB what it was.

      1. I feel like she gets cast in things because her dad probably writes a check. Sort of the vanity thing where you see 5-6 producers on a film where one guy really does all the work and everyone else is some guy putting money in.

        I assume that Kris Jenner is taking notes.

    2. Brooklyn Beckham comes across a lot like Prince Harry. They both have screwed up families of origin and legitimate grievances with their parents, yet still manage to come across as spoiled and entitled at every turn.

      1. I will give you Prince Harry having some trouble in the family of origin (the Spencer family seems like a hot mess going back generations, but at least tall and with excellent heads of hair). His mother died young and tragically. It seemed like he was close with Princess Anne and her kids, particularly Zara? Maybe he should have stayed in military service? Or something like the UK coast guard? Out of the danger of combat and tabloid trouble, but with his mates? [I still don’t care for his wining — an adult should just move it on along, realizing that everyone at some point has a lot of pain.]

        1. That’s what the royals tried to set him up with (a long term desk job organizing large scale UK events for the military, based in London, since he was at the move up or out stage and wasn’t passing tests to move up to become an instructor). He lasted about a year and then quit. He met Meghan less than a year later, so hadn’t been able to find stability on his own outside of the military which I think exacerbated all of his grievances.

          It seems like Harry and Brooklyn are both men who grew up in dysfunctional homes (to differing extents) and struggled to find their place as adults. Then they met women who were very willing to put the blame entirely on the families of origin for these men’s issues instead of helping them find stability within the original family unit (we know Meghan also grew up with dysfunction in her family and I’m assuming the same of the billionaire Peltzs.) And then you get burning the whole thing down and no acknowledgment of personal accountability or empathy for others – just a long list of public grievances.

          Dysfunction begets dysfunction, and its very difficult to get out of that cycle.

      2. i’ll give Prince Harry a lot of credit for his military service and work with veterans. As far as I can tell Brooklyn has done absolutely no real ‘work’ other than vanity projects which you know his parents paid for/facilitated. His post reeks of ‘my mommy and daddy had the audacity to make me get a job at 25 and kicked me off the family phone plan/out of the basement’…but at millionaire levels.

      3. Prince Harry is miles more entertaining, though. The Beckhams are somehow boring despite the drama. They don’t have the super weird upbringing that the British royals have which makes them seem worse, especially because they don’t seem committed to any positive effort in the world. I’m not saying the Prince Harry is a genius or making a major impact, but most of his publicity efforts are at least charity or service-adjacent. He’s not out there shilling books of his terrible photography.

        1. Harry did once make a complaint to the British press regulator re an article the Daily Mail wrote about a picture of an elephant Harry took! (He lost.) What is it about wealthy British men and elephant photography?

    3. This drama has been a wonderful distraction. My take is the truth lies somewhere in the middle. I believe the Beckhams are image-focused, can be controlling, and hate Nicola. But Nicola’s had a bad reputation for a long time and she seems to have issues with everyone (like the three wedding planners who quit or she fired).
      I get the impression Brooklyn is well meaning but clueless. His statement contains technically true but misleading details. That stuff is easily fact checked and he doesn’t know how to play the media game like his parents. He and Nicola just come across as fame hungry, but they don’t have the talent to stay relevant on their own.

      1. Describing a custom Valentino as a last minute panic dress literally the day after he died is definitely not media savvy. He might have awful parents but that’s in poor taste.

        1. Agreed. I thought my fashion algorithms picked this up from the fashion reference. But OMG what a dumpster fire lives within his head. RIP Valentino — I think I will go wear something red.

    4. The statement didn’t sound AI to me. I believe Nicola and her family are awful but that doesn’t mean the Beckhams are behaving well or that Brooklyn is unjustified in wanting space from them. A lot of his statement rang true to me. The Beckhams are definitely image-obsessed and have been known for years to tightly control their image in the British press. David is also a well known cheater and it wouldn’t surprise me if that’s done a number on Victoria’s mental health and made her codependent on the kids in an unhealthy way. It’s a common pattern and a lot of what he said about the wedding tracks with that sort of pattern. Mainly I feel bad for any future kids B and N will have.

      1. You can have a thought in your head without saying it though. Or posting it for bored office workers who need to actually earn money ripping it up. Is living well not the best revenge? He had money and married more of it and yet just can’t go enjoy life.

        1. This. I feel bad for his little sister who did not need all this on social media for her friends and classmates to read.

        2. Eh his parents have been kind of ripping him and Nicola to shreds with constant stories about him blocking them on social, not attending his dad’s milestone birthday party, etc. I understand him wanting to defend himself and his wife – who probably sucks for other reasons but is being blamed entirely for the rift between him and his parents which feels pretty misogynistic. He’s a grown adult and it seems like his issues with his parents long predate his relationship w his wife, so I can understand wanting to make that known.

          1. IDK — she is posting pictures of her revenge tattoo. Do I need all this? Only as a distraction from world politics and the weather. My family of origin is so bland and normal seeming now.

          2. No, it’s much more likely from the stories that have been showing up in TMZ and the tabloids that the constant leaks are coming from the Peltz-Beckhams, not his parents. I don’t always rate laineygossip but she’s done some pretty good breakdowns during this saga setting out why it’s coming from that side.

    5. My opinion of the Beckham kids is so low that I actually have an involuntary dislike to David Attenborough’s new projects because he partnered with Brooklyn

        1. Seriously, they’re so young how could you have such hatred? The non-Brooklyn ones are 23, 21, and 14!!

        2. Promoting your kids is just what people do. And in many professions or trades, like farming or teaching or plumbing, kids go into the family business even if you don’t push them. Especially in Hollywood. For every Taylor Dearden or Isa Briones, we have ten Tori Spellings. That Brooklyn is ranting about this shows you how naive he is — does he live in a bubble?

        3. I don’t think they’re problematic, I think they are talentless. And they aren’t children anymore, except the daughter

    6. I’m mostly on team “awful people being awful” but it certainly seems likely/credible that there is drama between mothers-in-law and daughters-in-law at all income levels.

      1. IDK. Her working with Valentino for a year for her wedding dress backup plan is sort of me ordering from Lulu’s in a panic. I’d love to have that much $.

        But given the wedding drama (which IIRC was planners vs Peltzes), and the choice of someone for Marc Anthony as a performer, I’m not digging team Peltz at all. Have no opinion on the Beckhams. Feel bad for the daughter. Insta has lively memes for the first dance (surely a recording will surface — give me what I want what I really really want).

        2. Most brides at the income level have multiple looks so I assume she was working with Valentino on one and with VB on one? I think it’s entirely possible VB was supposed to be the primary dress. Then when it fell apart they spun it into “we’ve been working with Valentino for a year” to save face and hide the fact that she’d been ditched by Victoria, because that’s pretty embarrassing (especially if her own bad behavior played a role in the dressmaking relationship falling apart and they thought VB would go to the press with those details)

  11. We are planning to get our first dog. Thoughts on pet insurance? Is it worth it or is it better to just put a set amount in savings every month? I have no idea how much it costs for vet visits and the like.

    1. In my experience, pet insurance is hardly ever worth it. Suffers from the problem that the only people who get it are people with more unhealthy animals that need more treatment.

        1. Same. I would allot $300-500/year for the routine checkup and vaccinations, and expect to spend up to $150 or so a month on allergy medications or Cytopoint if needed and effective. A surprising number of dogs have allergies that lead to bigger issues if untreated. Then be prepared to spend $300 – 1,000 every time the dog has a minor illness or injury, which may happen rarely or a few times a year. Last year my dog had a sprained toe that required x-rays, a couple of ear infections, and a recurrence of a tickborne illness from before she was rescued that required a lot of expensive bloodwork to diagnose.

          You can save yourself a lot of money and heartache if you keep your dog crated when unsupervised so it can’t ingest foreign objects.

          1. This is good, and I also wanted to add budget for dental cleanings! These need to be done under anesthesia, so depending on your vet and area, could cost ~1,000. More if extractions are needed. Regular dentals are super important for long term health.

          2. Especially if it is a younger dog who you can acclimate to the handling, just learn how to clean your dog’s teeth yourself and then do it consistently. Same with ears. My vet is so glad we keep up on our pets’ dental maintenance ourselves. Not only does it make it much easier for the vet to handle our dog’s mouth, but the risks of putting the animal under for cleaning are not minimal.

    3. It’s still pretty buyer beware / under regulated, so a lot of people prefer the savings approach still if they know they can save the money after pricing out the premiums against what’s covered.

      Veterinary care itself is a little better, but still varies widely in cost and quality (sometimes by reverse association!). If you live near a great veterinary research hospital, you may find that you have the opportunity to spend more with good reason someday, but you’d also want some idea if insurance would even cover interventions that may be on the cutting edge. Get recommendations to find a good local vet for ordinary check ups. Believe the negative reviews of for profit hospitals.

    4. I’m also interested in the answers. I have a young adult dog but don’t have pet insurance because it never seemed worth it (I’m able to cover unexpected expenses). My biggest worry is something very expensive in dog’s later years like cancer treatment.

    5. We got a reasonably priced plan through Costco. Depends on what kind of dog you have. We have a Labrador who tries to chew everything. Saves our butts last summer when she ate a rock and needed obstruction surgery on her bowels. As long as my kids are young and she is otherwise healthy, I’ll keep it for those big ticket items.

    6. Consider the breed of dog. Mutts are often healthier than breeder dogs because of genetic diversity. Some breeds can have health problems.

    7. I would maybe consider it if I were to get a puppy of an active breed, where it could be helpful in case of a TPLO surgery or something similar, but the plans I’ve looked at have so many exclusions. What I have done instead is put the same amount as the monthly premium into a savings account and basically self-insuring that way.

    8. Look for a Canine Good Citizen training course and sign yourself up! Understanding how to train and interact with your dog, and then doing the training with them makes such a huge difference in your quality of life with the dog.

    9. I typically don’t insure my pets but I have a husky mix who wound up in the ER twice in six months for dumb things he did and he’s young enough that pet insurance was reasonably priced for him, so I bought it after his second $1000 ER bill. My older dog has never had a health issue (and isn’t dumb enough to eat things he shouldn’t), so he remains uninsured. So, long story short, it may depend on the breed and it’s not something you have to purchase immediately, but generally is less expensive if the dog is younger.

    10. Read the fine print to know how much coverage you’re buying and your own financial situation. It can keep you from having a surprise 2K bill. My policy maths out to a 50% discount if I use all the coverage in a year. I take my dog to the vet for a lot, including nail trims and she’s always getting into something so it’s easy to get there. If you don’t get it when they’re puppies, many things will be excluded down the road. For me it’s a little savings, a lot of not being surprised.

    11. I got pet insurance for my doodle when I got him as a puppy 5 years ago. The insurance (Nationwide) was offered through my workplace, and I kept the same rate when I left that company. I’ve broken even or saved money every year since. The first year I had him neutered, last year he needed x-rays for a persistent cough and related issues, and this year we’re going to do a dental cleaning. Those tipped the scale in favor of insurance for those years. He also has allergies and is on a special diet, so all his food is covered under our policy. Add to that vet visits and the monthly flea/tick meds, and I find it worthwhile.

    12. This may not be right for higher-earning folks here, but my now-husband and I were somewhat broke when we got our first dog, and used Banfield (the vet at Petsmart) and their monthly plan. Was about $40/month (depends on plan) and covers spay/neuter for puppies, all vaccinations, wellness visit every 6 months, yearly labs, and discounts on anything outside of that. We pay for flea/tick prevention separately. Both our dogs our now on their wellness plans, and it works great for us. Of course, this doesn’t work if you want a specific vet, but we’ve have no issues with the staff at our location and see not reason to stop now.

      1. Late but +1. Got my dog at 4 yo, he’s turning 15 next month. $54/mo at Banfield and they’ve been great. One annual dental included. All vaxs inclded. Bloodwork inlcuded, extras greatly discounted. I like seeing the different vets. Two of them had groundbreaking ideas for this complicated medical management dog. Once we got an internist who was subbing. She was so incredibly thorough it almost made me cry. We still spent a lot of money outside of Banfield (annual echocardiograms, a renal failure episode with three overnights, specialist visits) but no pet insurance was going to cover any of that anyway. And no extra paperwork with Banfield, a huge win for my busy family.

    13. I don’t pay for coverage for routine care, which I self pay. But I have pet insurance for pay about $40 a month to have coverage of accidents, illness, surgery etc, which I think is absolutely worth it, as that can be in the thousands of dollars just for overnight stays at vet hospital, meds, tests, etc. I have MetLife pet insurance for my dog. I spend about $250 a year on his heartworm and flea meds, and its $65 for each vaccine.

    14. Financially pet insurance is a wash, but it may be valuable if your dog ever needs an expensive procedure and cost would be a factor in deciding to euthanize vs. treat.

      My beloved dog had a horrible spate of infections, and it was hard to stomach the out of pocket cost (we paid and he recovered). My neighbor who has dachshunds keeps them insured because if they ever need spine surgery she wants to be able to pay for it.

    15. I’m clearly the minority but it’s been worth it’s weight in gold to us in the last 18 months. Kind of like, we didn’t need it until we needed it?

      My 12 year old rescue pup has a penchant for swallowing things her whole life so we’ve used it periodically when we’ve had to take her in over the years. For a long time the premium was extremely low so the math worked such that it was financial beneficial to have, though not by much. We have PetsBest unlimited coverage up with a 5% co insurance. However, after swallowing something about 12 months ago, ironically in week two of our annual renewal (so we effectively had a full 12 months of coverage available to us), they found an aggressive incidental diagnosis (splenic cancer with other complicating factors). We’re in our last few weeks with my old girl, but the insurance has allowed us to investigate, make her comfortable via expensive medicine, and care for her as best we could during the last year.

      I think we probably got lucky with timing – it happened with a full year of coverage at our disposal so we were able to figure a lot out, but I am grateful for it and will consider it with future pets. Probably not something I’ll get day 1 but probably around age 3 or 4, UNLESS the pup likes to swallow things and doggie ER visits happen with any level of frequency/regularity.

    16. We found it worth it when our dog needed a $3,500 surgery on his ACL and lots of follow-up therapy. It also covered his meds for arthritis, thyroid, etc. when he got older.

      We just had an illness/major accident plan so it didn’t cover wellness visits, flea meds, etc.

      We will definitely have it for future dogs.

    17. Put that money into an account and don’t touch it. You will need it at some point over the dog’s lifetime.
      If you do get it, do your research and get one of the more reputable companies. A lot has changed in this space, especially as private equity has been buying independent veterinarians for the last several years. It’s driving costs way up so plan for the long term.

  12. I volunteer to teach trial advocacy skills. I was recruited by someone familiar with my legal work. I’ve been volunteering for about a decade, and I probably dedicate around 40 hours a year to it.

  13. I historically haven’t been a fish eater, but lately have been wanting to start eating it for the health benefits. What is a good starting place for both taste and ease of cooking? I’m very intimidated by the idea of cooking fish for some reason (the smell? The idea that it’s finicky?) but I’m also nervous about ordering fish out at a restaurant and then not liking it either.

    Open to all advice!

    1. There are no magical nutrients in fish you can’t get elsewhere. Fishing is such a sketchy industry that’s nearly impossible to regulate.

      1. That is so not true. It’s well-regulated in this country. But locally sourced seafood and don’t buy farmed crap.

        1. Do you know any fisherman? They have a lot to say about how the regulations play out in real life.

        2. Fishing happens out in the middle of the ocean, ‘regulations’ are things on paper. It’s common for origins of catches and species to be falsified, catches to be kept in freezer ships, catches being swapped between ships etc. This is literally my day job. You can’t regulate what happens on a boat in the middle of the ocean because you can’t enforce it.

    2. What helped me was going out to dinner with people who liked fish and trying theirs.

      The first fish/seafood I enjoyed (and this was when I was nearly 30 years old) other than canned tuna was mussels. Then shrimp and crab. I still don’t love most regular fish, but if you have a chance to try turbot or halibut, try them! I would eat more fish if it all tasted like those.

      Another thing that got me eating more fish was sushi. Go to a reputable but not super expensive place and try some. If you don’t like it, you aren’t out the cost of a whole entree. I found I actually liked raw fish much better than cooked fish! I also loved raw oysters the first time I tried them.

      1. Yes, I’ve been trying my BF’s fish if he orders it when we’re out! My dad is always happy to let me have a bite too. I’ll try turbot or halibut!

      2. Farmed mussels are sprayed with biocides so their shells are smooth and barnacle free, yuck. Wild mussels mess up local ecosystems and are full of micro plastics (they’re filter feeders afterall).

        1. If wild mussels are bad for the local ecosystems, isn’t that all the more reason to eat them?

          1. Removing them from local ecosystems is what is bad. They help manage water quality

    3. I was like this – for me, ordering restaurant salmon in a very slightly “high pressure” situation (a dinner with colleagues – not super stressful, but just enough to be awkward if I just…didn’t eat it) got me over the initial hurdle! I reminded myself that worst case, I *could* eat enough to get through, it was a food many people liked, and I wasn’t allergic…and then, it was delightful! Not for everyone, but the sink-or-swim aspect was helpful for me.

    4. I much prefer restaurant fish (especially in coastal areas with fresh fish) to fish from the grocery store cooked at home. Pre-pregnancy I ate fish at home but didn’t love it. Pregnancy put me off fish to the point that I can’t stomach home cooked fish anymore but I still like restaurant fish.

      I know restaurant ordering feels higher stakes but I think the easiest and best way to try this is to order a local fish in a restaurant when you’re on vacation in a coastal area. I was in Charleston SC this past weekend and had so much good fresh fish.

    5. I enjoy fish but not smelling it for the next several days. I find that if I cook salmon in the oven submerged in a dish of sauce or marinade, it comes out perfectly moist with very little lingering odor. I like the Atlantic salmon from Trader Joe’s.

    6. I never ate fish until I was in my 30s and decided I needed to get over it for my kids’ sake. I didn’t want to pass my phobia to another generation. I started with tilapia, because it seemed like the least-fishy option, and used it in a fish curry. You could barely tell there was fish in it, but I discovered that I really liked the flakiness of fish. What I didn’t like, and probably why I had never eaten it, was the smell. Now I eat fish regularly and enjoy it, but I buy it fresh and use it by the next day (it starts smelling after that), or I buy it frozen and use it as soon as it thaws. I dispose of the packaging and uncooked leftovers immediately. They cannot sit in my trash overnight. I use leftover cooked fish for lunch the next day or not at all, again, to keep the smell under control. Most fish is not finicky-it cooks really fast, is endlessly customizable, and does not require 57 ingredients. It also doesn’t get tough if you overcook it.

      1. Definitely try several varieties of fish because they are so different and people’s tastes vary. I love salmon, tuna, and mahi mahi and don’t hate cod or sole, but there is something vaguely chicken-y to the flavor and texture of tilapia that I cannot stand. So if you don’t like one fish, try a different one!

    7. My family didn’t really eat fish, so I started it eating it as an adult. To me it’s finicky in the same way as an egg (narrow window between uncooked and overcooked). But I already had the skill since I could already fry an egg, so that’s the initial approach I took to cooking it (in a hot pan on the stove). A little lemon neutralizes the smell for me.

      Now I cook fish in the convection oven more often if I’m confident in my cooking times since it’s easier to feed more people that way.

    8. The thing about fish is the taste of it varies pretty wildly depending on type, and I think you’re just going to have to try a bunch to find which ones you like. I only like salmon and tuna, for example, (this is somewhat ironic as my family owned a seafood restaurant) even though most people would tell you white fish like pollock and grouper have a milder taste. If you happen to live in a place with Publix grocery stores, I recommend their brown sugar salmon they sell at the seafood counter–it’s delicious and super easy to cook (just bake in the oven for 18ish minutes–it’s done when it’s flaky).

    9. I grew up in a landlocked state with parents that hated fish, then married a guy who had always lived costal and really likes fish! Unfortunately, he’s a terrible cook and was not able to teach me how to cook fish, only how to enjoy it. It took a couple of low-pressure exposures over months to get used to the texture (I stole a bite of my husband’s entree at a restaurant here and there until the texture wasn’t alarming). I then started with a grilled tilapia fish taco for learning to make it at home, since the other ingredients can help cover flaws in the fish and it’s being made outside so smell isn’t really an issue. And then after I’d done it once it wasn’t so intimidating and I was able to try other recipes that my husband suggested. If you don’t have a fish lover you can share food with in your life, sorry for the bad advice.

    10. If you’re going to eat fish for the health benefits, focus on the fish with omega-3s and don’t bother with non-oily fish like tilapia, there’s not much point. You also want to avoid fish higher up the food chain because they’re high in mercury, PCBs, and other toxins. Think salmon, anchovies, herring, sardines, trout, some tuna. Most of those come in cans and don’t even need to be cooked if you find cooking intimidating. Or just eat more chia, flax and hemp seeds and soy if you don’t like fish.

    11. I would suggest cod or tilapia as a mild white fish to order. I love salmon, but it might be too assertive for you. Other options at home would be to try tinned fish. Some of it might be higher in sodium if you buy something with a lot of smoke or other seasoning, but it is easier to add to dishes if you don’t want to deal with the smell. Think of things like frittatas, fish cakes, different pastas, etc.

    12. I can’t stand the smell of fish cooking, so I usually have it only at a restaurant or when it can be cooked outdoors.

    13. ymmv on whether you feel the fried coating cancels out other health benefits, but fish and chips is a good way to eat fish without really tasting the fish.

      1. I agree with this! Fresh fried white fish or shrimp would be my rec for a gateway meal. Very un-fishy, and familiar when breaded. Get used to the taste/texture, then you can level up.

    14. I don’t know what’s available where you live, but as a Great Lakes region person I’ve always liked mild freshwater fish like walleye and perch a lot better than oily ocean fish. Quick toss in flour, then pan saute in a little butter and olive oil.

      Alternatively, fish and chips if you’re out somewhere and the restaurant can worry about the deep-fry mess!

    15. I actually don’t order fish in restaurants often, but I make it at home when my husband is out for the night (because he doesn’t like it). My favorite recipe right now is honey sriracha salmon over jasmine rice – get a center cut salmon portion from the store, marinate in a mix of sriracha, honey, soy sauce (equalish measures) with some crushed garlic, after about an hour pop it in the oven at 350F for about 20 minutes. I like to serve it with rice, sauteed kale, and hemp seeds.

      Alternatively, I get some white fish – cod, haddock, halibut, or sea bass – and season it with a generic fish seasoning, bake it with some butter, take it out, add a squeeze of lemon, serve with brown rice or rice pilaf with your choice of veggies. Or cook it on the stove with diced tomatoes, garlic, tarragon, and some white wine, serve with brown rice.

    16. Here’s what I did this weekend, and it was so good we had it two nights in a row: went to a local fish monger and bought really fresh fillets of petrale sole. Salt and pepper on both sides. Dipped them in flour, then eggs (two eggs beaten in a bowl), then panko breadcrumbs (I added a bit of salt to the breadcrumbs too because I like a salty crust). Heated up a cast iron pan, once hot I added a generous amount of vegetable oil. Fried the breaded fillets on each side 3 minutes. Served with lemon wedges and dill, and I had some tartar sauce already so I used that. Delicious! And my 5 year old loved it too.

    17. I love seafood (except oysters but only because I’m allergic). We’re landlocked so we buy frozen or tinned.
      Salmon in the air fryer is easy – toss the filets in frozen and after cooking for 5 min, top with maple syrup and grainy mustard and then finish cooking. Can also top with soy/hoisin, butter/herbs, etc.
      Shrimp is also easy and versatile – stir-fries, scampi, tacos, etc. It cooks quicker than you think.
      We do fancy tinned fish with nice bread and wine for an at-home date night.

          1. Then another 5 mins after adding sauce? Sounds delicious – one of the best meals I ever had was salmon in mustard sauce in Canada and eager to recreate!

          2. Eh, it usually takes closer to 8 min to finish cooking, but YMMV. If you have a thermometer it takes all the guesswork out.

    18. I like most fish and seafood. I love to get it in restaurants at the coast, but at home I keep it easy.

      I like putting anchovies on pizza and on boiled egg sandwhiches.

      I like tinned tuna on pizza, with red onion and olives. I get the fancy tuna in virgin olive oli.

      I like tinned wild-caught salmon in a quick pasta. Onion, garlic, peas, cream and parmesan sauce.

      I like a cream-based fish soup with potatoes, carrots, leeks and dill – frozen cubes of salmon and cod.

      I like smoked salmon and scrambled eggs, or blini with sour cream and smoked salmon.

      Cured mackerel is lovely with pickled vegetable and potato salad or slaw.

      Stir-fried cooked prawns with noodles or in a curry.

      White fish or prawns in a spicy Thai curry.

      What all of these dishes have in common is that you don’t cook any raw fish, which takes all the guesswork out of the cookery.

      1. This post is why I decided to give fish a try (I’m the one who didn’t really eat it until I was in my 30s). It opened up so many more interesting things to eat!

    19. Don’t cook it. Go to Trader Joe’s and experiment with the fine selection of tinned/canned fish. Put the fish in pasta salads. You can get tinned wild salmon for a fraction of the cost of fresh/frozen wild salmon. Put it over pasta with tons of pesto, or mix it in with fried rice.

      1. Trader Joe canned smoked trout is one of my favorite things. I mix it with some mayonnaise, a little lemon juice, and chopped chives or green onions if I have them.

    20. Smoked salmon on bagels is somewhat an acquired taste but so easy. I also do salmon filets in the oven, canned salmon mixed in pasta, and homemade tuna melts. At restaurants, I love mussels, fish and chips, and fresh catch of the day. Don’t eat swordfish because it’s very high in mercury.

    21. I love eating fish now, and 2 things help— individually frozen fish (I really like cod), and my air fryer. Makes it easy, no smell or major cleanup.

  14. I and every sane European works hard to distinguish between the current administration and the American people, but we are angry and appalled by Trumps actions and genuinely sad about the break down in the relationship between our countries. Being a tiny country we will have to be pragmatic in some ways, but the trust is gone

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