Suit of the Week: Brooks Brothers

For busy working women, the suit is often the easiest outfit to throw on in the morning. In general, this feature is not about interview suits for women, which should be as classic and basic as you get — instead, this feature is about the slightly different suit that is fashionable, yet professional.

Happy Hump Day! I’m liking this boucle suit from Brooks Brothers. The wool/silk/linen mixture sounds comfortable and soft — and I like the fact that they’ve added Lycra “for added stretch and shape retention.” The light blue, grayish color also seems really nice for spring and summer. The jacket (Four-Button Boucle Jacket) is $598, and the dress (Sleeveless Boucle Dress) is $498.

(L-5)

Comments

  1. PharmaGirl says:

    Not in my budget, but this is lovely.

    • Seconded. So lovely and so expensive….sigh.

      • TCFKAG says:

        I HATE BUDGETS!!!!!!!!!! ;-)

        • TCFKAG says:

          BTW… this is going to reveal how much (too much) HGTV I watch, but every time people post “out of the budget” on here lately, I hear the new host from Property V*rgins saying “Say it with me, Out of the Budget…” like she did in ALL the commercials for a month. Over and over again. :-P

      • Ellen says:

        But it is WORTH it. Brook’s brothers has VERY CLASSEICAL Lines that make us look alot thinner, so why NOT I say.

        The manageing partner told me he would pay up to the lesser of $350 or 20% that I spend to UPGRADE my wardrobe this year, but HE has to PRE-APPROOVE the clotheing that I select.

        I first thought this was DUMB, but I spend alot, and $350 would be good. I just do NOT want him comeing to the store for fittings. FOOEY on that I told him.

        I told him I would show him clotheing on the INTERNET and if he approved, I would then give him the copy of the bill and he would PAY me 20% up to $350 this year.

        He is not all bad.

        • anon in DC says:

          I’m not a lawyer but this doesn’t seem legal, or ethical…

          • TCFKAG says:

            Why not? Why would it be different then a workplace that provided a uniform or clothes budget for its employees? (which btw, my dad’s does because its a union perk).

          • TCFKAG says:

            Okay, the part about the manageing partner approving the clothes is a wee bit creepy, but not necessarily illegal or even unethical (as long as it isn’t used as a method of sexual harassment…which knowing this manageing partner I guess is questionable).

        • Godzilla says:

          eLLEN, your manageing partner sounds like a DOOSH.

    • Agreed. Beautiful, but out of budget…

      • CA Atty says:

        Oh, add me to the chorus of beautiful and too expensive…

        • Can't Wait to Quit says:

          This reminds me of my old Brooks Brothers searsucker suit – ladylike but also businesslike. I still have it in my closet, but it’s from when I was a size 2 right out of college. I keep it for sentimental value.

          • I’m so glad I’m not the only one who does this!

          • My mom kept her first “nice” suit for sentimental reasons. Fortunately, it was an extremely timeless style and cut, and I wore it briefly (until I had a growth spurt…). Though I probably hoard too many of my old clothes, I’d love to do the same thing for a daughter.

    • I love the idea of a jacket over a dress in the same color — so easy and comfortable. But this one looks a little boxy (and like something my grandmother would have worn to church), even on the model.

  2. Does anybody know anything about color glossing treatments? I think that’s what Aveda calls them, but I’m sure others have a similar thing. Have you ever gotten one, or do you know anyone who has? I am fine with my hair color but have been wanting something different recently, just to spice it up. So I got highlights, but I just don’t think I’m ready to spend that much money and go to the salon that often, when I’m really okay with my hair color. So I thought this might be a good compromise. Thoughts? Will it work if you have really dark hair?

    • TCFKAG says:

      I’ve gotten my hair “glossed” a few times. I talked about it with my hair dresser as essentially a middle ground between a deep conditioning treatment and a full-on keratin treatment (my hair is very thick and frizzy/wavy but not actually curly). It definitely makes it softer and straighter and easier to manage and gives it a nice shine. And since my hair has some nice natural highlights, it sort of brings those out (if you know what I mean). Its actually really great and I was very happy with the results.

      • That sounds great. The salon’s website has “glossing” and “color glossing.” Did yours involve any color?

        Just based on your description, it may be worth doing regardless of any changes in the color. How long did the effect last?

        • TCFKAG says:

          I didn’t do a color gloss — so I guess mine would be just a “gloss” (not sure how the color would effect it). I think the strongest effect lasted 6-8 weeks with some lasting impact up to 12 weeks or so.

        • Coalea says:

          I had a color gloss done once – in my natural hair color. The idea being to (1) add glossiness, shocker, and (2) beef up the texture of my fine hair. I was underwhelmed. Maybe my expectations were too high – if nothing else, I was envisioning shampoo commercial type glossiness – but I didn’t notice much of a change on either front.

    • Supra says:

      I use a glossing treatment on top of color. They way I understand it is that the color goes mostly on the roots (the same as my natural color) and the gloss goes all over my hair. It makes my hair really shiny and soft. I think my hair reflects light very nicely.

      I have thick, course hair that I blow dry and flat iron near daily.

    • just Karen says:

      I’ve had a color gloss in between full colorings, and have been very happy with them. You won’t get much of a color change if your hair is really dark (though you might be able to add substantial red). It’s not a dramatic change in look, but my hair does seem to behave better with them.

    • I’ve had a gloss done in the salon once but this was probably 5 years ago and back when I was coloring my hair and I liked it. I’m not coloring hair now (dark brunette) but I get some pretty decent highlights from being outside and a few weeks ago I decided that I wanted to try the gloss again. I had some Frederik Fekkai stuff in the closet that I’ve been using and I really like it – made my natural highlights pop and my hair was shinier. I’ve used it about 3 times in the last 2 weeks. I was at the grocery store the other day and bought some Clairol clear gloss – that was the only brand I could find, so the choice was easy. I haven’t tried it out yet…..

    • Bonnie says:

      I got color glosses regularly for a while. It hid the grays but was less maintenance than permanent color. The gloss fades over time so no visible roots.

      • Diana Barry says:

        I just got a gloss done about 6 weeks ago. I didn’t really like it – it hardly changed my hair color at all and it went from being wavy to more straight/limp/oily (I have very fine hair, reasonably thick but very fine). Blech. Not worth it for color IMO – but if you have coarse/curly/etc hair, the smoothing effect would be great.

      • Suited Up says:

        Yes, I just did the same a few weeks ago. It has definitely started losing its full shine at this point (my stylist said the semi-permanent lasts up to 8 weeks.) I’m mostly happy with my natural color, except I have a very noticeable grays, especially in my bangs. I can still see the gray but the texture is more manageable at least. I’m not sure if I’ll get it re done- I might have to go for full on gray coverage pretty soon :( !

  3. karenpadi says:

    Don’t forget! Bay Area meet-up Saturday and the Cantor Arts Center at 11:30 am.

  4. Has anyone ever just suddenly realized what they wanted out of life?

    I’m 22, a 1L, and from what you’ve seen me post on here, had a somewhat miserable year with many ups and downs. I’ve been dealing with mental health issues for the past 2-3 years and I finally feel like I’m on an upswing.

    That being said, today it just occurred to me that I can construct my life however I want. I am a fully functioning adult and lucky enough to be in law school. I can work towards the life I want to construct and make things better for myself. I want a good job, a nice place, a good man and a healthy and happy body. And it is fully in my power to get all of those things.

    I know this is random, lol, but I seem to have stumbled upon a bit of early-20s clarity, and am holding on to it for dear life.

    • Bette says:

      I know exactly what you are talking about.

      I had an epiphany at about a similar age. When traveling abroad alone, I suddenly realized that there were so many more ways to have an interesting and fulfilled life than the few narrow paths that I had been exposed to in my middle class, suburban childhood. I then promptly jettisoned my previous plans to become a lawyer to take a career that was much more off the beaten path of life but one that I have enjoyed tremendously and has brought me a lot of new experiences.

    • Batgirl says:

      That’s great! I feel like I had a moment like that when I graduated college where I thought to myself “wow, I am in charge of ALL of this! I can do whatever I want!” Very exciting indeed! Just don’t let hiccups let you forget that it’s your life to craft. Good luck!

    • TCFKAG says:

      Well — as a late 20′s law school graduate — may I suggest constructing a framework with some flexibility in it. :-) Because, as they say, “no battle plan survives first contact with the enemy.” All the grand five-year or ten-year plans my friends and I had at 21 and 22 and 23 have changed and grown and evolved over the years with circumstances and the economy and life.

      So have a general plan, but don’t be so wedded to it that change frightens you. :-)

      • Can't Wait to Quit says:

        So agree. I love 1L’s sudden revelation, but I would hate to see her back here in 8 – 9 years beating herself up if she doesn’t happen to be married by 30 or something along those lines. You can construct the life you want, but you have to be ready to roll with the punches to do it.

        • Monday says:

          Without disagreeing, let me offer a seemingly opposite, but actually consistent piece of advice based on what I have experienced: don’t force yourself to have a certain “epiphany” more than once! They can be painful!

          What I mean is that when you decide X is what you truly want, don’t chip away at your priorities by compromising until you’re in a life that you barely recognize. I did that, and felt like an idiot because when I realized how unhappy I was, it was deja-vu. I realized that I really wanted…what I had *already* realized I really wanted. The problem was that I had forgotten in the interim.

          If I had “stayed the course” I could have spared myself a lot of stress and upheaval. I’m wiser for it, and there’s no point in regrets, but it wasn’t a particularly efficient or peaceful path to take.

      • TCFKAG, this may be one of your top five comments. Great implementation of “no battle plan survives first contact with the enemy.”

    • Susan says:

      Yes. In high school, I looked around at the miserable town that I grew up in. I wanted to escape the small-mindedness, the mean-ness, the racism, and the defeat of that town and knew that I had to work really hard to escape.

      But escape was also very possible (managed to get into a top-ranked college and applied for just about every scholarship out there + loans.) In the moment I realized that I wasn’t doomed to automatically having the same type of life as all those miserable, bitter, and unwelcoming people in that town, it was like a magic door opened into what had previously seemed like an impassible, unclimbable mountain.

      • I totally get this says:

        Yes, exactly. Even as early as age 12, I knew that I had to get the heck out of there. I was lucky to get into a few youth leadership academies in high school that gave me exposure to different types of people. It was awesome, but also made high school much more difficult because I could see to the other side but couldn’t get there yet. College didn’t solve everything (in fact, it introduced a host of new expectations) but I also had that epiphany around age 22 when I realized — you know what? I don’t have to do exactly what my professors want me to do, either. I will craft the career I want, not the one they want me to have. It was wonderfully freeing.

        So, way to go, OP. You’ve made a huge leap in how you’ll approach your life, one that takes many people way longer to figure out. :)

        • Susan and I totally get this, you make me so hopeful! My step daughter turns 12 this year and recently made a comment about wanting to move out of our state and I almost jumped for joy. I’m from “the city” and we currently live “in the country” where she has grown up and where both her parents are from and I just want her to know there is SOOOO much more than this town and the way people think and act here! There are a lot of lovely rural towns in the US but this isn’t one of them so I am hoping she follows your paths and chooses to spread her wings some, go to college, etc. Doing my best to expose her to different opportunities now so she can have both roots and wings as they say.

      • I think we’re twins. Ditto. And life has been good ever since I maanged my escape.

    • Former MidLevel says:

      Glad to hear it. Sometimes perspective can change everything. :)

    • January says:

      I’m in my late twenties (gah, still pains me to say that) and had a similar thought over the weekend (not for the first time, either). It definitely put a little extra spring in my step this week. So, congratulations on your epiphany! If you’re anything like me, I just want to add that these moments of clarity/upswings may well come and go over the years, and it will probably benefit you to keep this attitude — that you can create the life you want, at least to a degree — in mind, especially when things seem to get derailed. Good luck, and keep the faith! I’d also encourage reading Gretchen Rubin’s The Happiness Project, which would dovetail nicely with your new mindset – it’s all about large and small ways to make yourself happy in your life.

      • Monday says:

        We are very like-minded, January. However, I was thrilled to enter my late 20s, and even happier when I turned 30 a few months ago. The drama of ups and downs just sort of calms down, in my experience. The stakes actually get higher, but your ability to deal increases enough to keep up, and more.

        • Good to hear that other people have similar experiences. I feel like as I get older, life gets more complicated, but thankfully my ability to deal with stress grows as well. That said, I still need to remind myself to reach for more opportunities and personal growth, while setting boundaries in life to deal with some of the negative drama that pops up from time to time.

    • Houda says:

      Happened to me gradually over a 5 week-period just recently.
      Went from despair and being overwhelmed by dysfunctional family, job insecurity, financial troubles, low self-esteem to the complete opposite.
      I did not solve my problems. I simply changed my outlook on life when I hit rock bottom.
      And since then even if I get into miserable situations, I am so strong emotionally that I feel I own my own destiny.

  5. Patterned pants repost says:

    TJ – how do the Corporettes feel about patterned cropped or ankle pants for casual wear?
    Assume the pattern is not too wild… not cabbage roses.

    • I think some of the J. Crew ones look really cute . . . on the J. Crew models. I’ve never seen anyone wearing them in real life, and I think only a certain body type could get away with them. I’m relatively thin, for example, but curvy, so I don’t think I could do it.

      But, like everything, I think styled well and with an attitude of owning it, anyone can really wear anything! :)

    • violates my rule of never wearing a garden on my lady garden.

      but if you can pull it off, more power to you.

    • Bluejay says:

      I think something very subtle and classic ok. I’m thinking seersucker or some sort of pinstripe, maybe a plaid or madras if they’re more of a bermuda short. Otherwise, I certainly wouldn’t wear them, and I think you run the risk of looking really frumpy.

      There was a certain pair of be-flowered Talbot’s pants that was soundly criticized by commenters here, and I almost laughed out loud at work when I saw them on an outfit post by a certain “fashion” blogger who tends to have a unique interpretation of “fashion.” Awful.

  6. Lynnet says:

    I am supposed to leave on Friday for a whirlwind weekend in Vegas with close friends that we’ve been planning for months. I woke up this morning with a sore throat, cough, and headache. I’m drugged up and drinking copious amounts of peppermint tea. Any suggestions for how I can avoid this turning into a full-blown head cold?

    Also, any tips for doing Vegas on the cheap. We’re planning on spending most of our budget on a show and gaming, so cheap but good restaurant recommendations would be appreciated.

    • Nonny says:

      Oh dear. You have my sympathy, as someone who was deathly ill (well, maybe not “deathly”, but certainly the worst cold I have ever had, plus a throat infection) when I went to Vegas for the very first time, last spring. I was so set on going that I just drugged myself up and took about 5 different kinds of medication with me. I don’t really recommend it, but hey, it worked. However, there was no late-night partying for me, let me tell you.

      I have no real suggestions other than not working tomorrow or Friday, and staying at home in bed to try to beat this thing before it gets worse. Good luck!

    • PollyD says:

      Sleep, lots of liquids, and the good Mucinex, the kind they keep behind the counter. I find that if I take those when I feel like I am getting sick, they help clear out the sinuses so things can’t settle in and reproduce.

    • Anonymous says:

      Go to the doctor immediately and get a Z Pack. It will knock out whatever you have.

      • Anonynonynony says:

        A z-pack is an antibiotic and if all the OP has is a cold, it won’t actually help. :-P

      • Seriously? says:

        To anonymous @ 3:44…

        Suggesting that the OP go to a doctor is one thing; suggesting that she “get a Z pack [sic]” is irresponsible. Patients demanding antibiotics in cases where they are not necessary is a major cause of over-prescribing, which leads to antibiotic resistance. Unless the OP has a bacterial infection, which you have no way to know, antibiotics are not warranted.

        http://www.fda.gov/drugs/resourcesforyou/consumers/ucm143568.htm

        • Lynnet says:

          Don’t worry, I’m well aware of the problems associated with antibiotic resistance, and way too lazy/cheap to drag myself into the doctor for a head cold anyway. :) I will be drinking copious amounts of orange juice, though.

        • Ummm, for those of us that were college athletes, I can tell you that our training room handed out Z packs at the slightest sniffle, as if they were going out of style. Irresponsible? Perhaps. But it does nip illnesses in the bud in some cases, so yeah–collective good at odds with indiv. outcome….

          • lucy stone says:

            This always reminded me of regular health services asking if you’re pregnant. You go in there with a sinus infection, “Are you pregnant?”

            Go see your trainer with a sprained ankle and you get the same attitude with “Do you need a Z-pak?”

        • Anonymous says:

          To “Seriously” – I hope you’re just having a bad day. Presumably a doctor worth his/her credentials will not cave to a patient “demand” but actually form an independent diagnosis. I don’t think it’s “irresponsible” to suggest a z-pack on a forum like this.

          • Seriously? says:

            First of all, it’s Z-Pak.

            Secondly, the issue of physicians inappropriately prescribing antibiotics to pacify patients is well documented.

            “There have been many studies documenting that physicians feel pressured by patients to prescribe antibiotics. A survey of 1000 pediatricians found that half often felt pressure from patients’ parents to prescribe antibiotics for illnesses not requiring antimicrobial therapy. Of greater concern, one-third of the pediatricians surveyed admitted that they generally comply with such requests, even in cases they believed did not warrant antibiotics (Pediatr 1999;103:395). Two large studies of adult patients in family practice settings also clearly demonstrated that physicians are much more likely to prescribe medication when they thought the patient expected a prescription, although these studies were not restricted to antibiotic therapy (BMJ 1997;315:1506; BMJ 1997;315:520).” Emergency Medicine News: February 2002 – Volume 24 – Issue 2 – p 15-16

            That said, I’m having a lovely day. Thank you!

        • And for those of us with chronic illnesses, it is perfectly common to walk into a doctor’s office and ask for a specific medication after the 15th year straight of having the same cold that you know will turn into bronchitis (as it does every year) and the only thing that makes it bearable is getting a double dose of Zithromax as soon as possible.

          The doctor is the medical expert, but I’m the expert on my body. And other antibiotics and I don’t tend to get along so well.

    • Taking Zyrtec religiously from the first sign of a cold works wonders for me. It really does lessen the severity and duration significantly. Also – no alcohol, lots of chicken soup and lots of sleep!

    • Amy H. says:

      I suggest vast amounts of Vitamin C (I like the Coldbuster smoothie made with frozen peaches substituting in for the sherbet) and zinc lozenges.

      Check out the latest issue of Saveur magazine for low- to high-end Vegas food ideas — I love food and now want to go pretty much everywhere they mentioned that I haven’t been yet! Personal favorites on the cheaper end (some of these are mentioned in that issue and some not) or ways to do expensive places for less:
      Tacos el Gordo at the north end of the Strip (there are a couple other locations but this is across the street from the Wynn if you’re in that area) (branch of a famous Tijuana place);
      The Korean BBQ place in the same strip mall as Tacos el Gordo;
      Wicked Spoon Buffet at Cosmopolitan;
      Burger Bar at Mandalay Bay;
      Border Grill at Mandalay Bay;
      Brunch (rather than dinner) at Bouchon in the Palazzo;
      Mon Ami Gabi at the Paris;
      Hash House a Go Go in the Imperial Palace (or if you don’t mind cabbing it, Mary’s Hash House on South Decatur Blvd.); and
      Lotus of Siam (very famous Thai place but very far off the Strip so you’ll need a cab).

      Two tricks to save money:
      1. Have your cabbie stop at a Circle K or similar to buy your own alcohol and fizzy water/soda/snacks for the room. That way you won’t be as temped by the minibar. (If you’re at the far north end at Wynn/Encore, there is a liquor store in the strip mall with Tacos el Gordo; if you’re at the south end at Mandalay/THEHotel etc., there is a liquor store in the strip mall across the street from the Four Season driving entrance in the little Motel 8 strip mall).

      2. Instead of ordering room service coffee (or suffering through the in-room coffeemaker experience for those hotels that actually still have one), ask one person in your group who’s less hung over to make the trek to Starbucks to bring back caffeine and sustenance. There is one either in or very close to every major hotel.
      2.

      • Amy H. says:

        Sorry, just remembered Bouchon is in the Venezia, not the Palazzo.

      • West Coast 3L says:

        Seconding Mon Ami Gabi and Hash House (sage fried chicken and waffles… mmmm). Bouchon is amazing, but a bit more expensive.

      • SF Bay Associate says:

        I’ve never been, but knowledgeable Thai friends say that Lotus of Siam is the best Thai restaurant in the western half of the US, if not the entire US. Next time I go to Vegas, I am making it a point to get there.

      • Lynnet says:

        Wow, thanks for all of these suggestions! It looks like we won’t have to give up on good food in order to enjoy all of the other benefits Vegas has to offer.

      • Um…if you are from a non- In-n-Out state, there is an In-n-Out in Vegas too, the only one where you can get “Nevada” In-n-Out t-shirts, which are GREAT gifts!

    • Barrister in the Bayou says:

      Go to an urgent care center/after hours place and see if they’ll give you a zpack or a light steroid.

      Other than that, I can only recommend zinc lozenges and as much water and sleep as you can handle.

      • Barrister in the Bayou says:

        Dang it, what the crap! This was for Lynnett!

        • Barrister in the Bayou says:

          Corporette is messing with me today. First it tells me I’m posting too quickly for about 20 minutes. Then my post is attached to someone else’s comment (i.e. not Lynett). But when I refreshed it magically appeared where it was supposed to be. I’m done with the ‘rette for the day!

    • Sorry you’re sick. I recommend Vitamin C loading and getting as much sleep as possible before you leave (and trying to sleep a reasonable amount when there so you don’t get worse). Re: tips for doing things cheaply, I did Vegas a couple times while very broke, so I have some advice. I assume you have a hotel by now but if you still need one, I recommend Harrah’s: I think we paid about $40 per night on a weekend and while it was nothing fancy, it was perfectly clean (like a typical Comfort Inn, I’d say). When you get to your hotel and if you visit other hotels, a lot of them have a sign or screen in the lobby with a number you can text for special deals. If you text that #, you’ll get coupons for things like 2 for 1 drinks and 20% off restaurants affiliated with that hotel/chain. There are also tons of coupon books around, so look for those as well.

      Regarding restaurants, Earl of Sandwich has good sandwiches for less than $10. If you like buffets, I recommend going about half hour before breakfast ends – you pay the cheaper breakfast price but its not too awkward to stay through lunch, so you get to eat a large brunch meal. I’m usually good for the day if I eat a brunch buffet, but if anything you’ll just need a light snack for dinner. A number of the fancier restaurants did reasonable (e.g. $30) three-course prix fixes back in the height of the recession. I’m not sure if they’re still going on, but we did that at Kokomo’s Steak and Seafood and really liked it. Im’ not sure what your definition of cheap is, but this is at least a cheaper way to have a really nice meal. A number of restaurants also have happy hours, usually both the traditional 4 to 6 pm or whatever and then a late night one from 10 to midnight, and that can be a place to get cheaper food and drinks.

      Enjoy your trip!

      I’m not a big drinker, but those $20 drinks at the pool add up really quickly, so if you want to drink, I recommend just going to a grocery store and buying some stuff.

      • Lynnet says:

        Thanks for all of the suggestions. I’m hoping we’ll get to do at least one fancier dinner, and a $30 three course prix fix sounds amazing. Also great tip on going to the buffet near the end of breakfast to get brunch!

        • DC Association says:

          I have been to Thailand and I have been to Lotus of Siam. It is the best, most authentic, Thai in the U.S. They actually have northern Thai dishes there, which are very hard to come by in the U.S. You must go for me!

          Yes, it is essential to cab it there and must CALL a cab to pick you up, as cabs cannot pull over on the side of the road to pick up passengers.

          (sorry for posting this in a strange place. was “posting too quickly” so trying again.)

          • Lynnet says:

            We’re actually driving there (I know, crazy, but it’s a beautiful drive and the Spring Break plane tickets were outrageous).

            After all of these recommendations I will definitely insist we go to Lotus of Siam!

          • Do NOT go to buffets in Vegas, not even at the nicest hotels. You have a very good chance of ending up with food poisoning or other yuckiness. I know this from a number of plaintiffs’ lawyers I know in Vegas — they all say that there is no amount of money you could ever pay them to eat at a Vegas buffet, and they should know.

        • Nonny says:

          Another buffet tip: you can get a 24-hour buffet ticket (actually a wristband) that works at all the buffets at Harrah hotels. It costs something like $50, and if you time it right, you can get 4 meals out of it. The buffets are pretty good, too. When I did it last year we went to Paris, Planet Hollywood (twice – we really liked it) and Caesar’s Palace. It is actually a really good deal because you don’t feel you have to eat a lot at each buffet (unless you want to….I have a problem resisting crab in any form), and each meal works out to about $12.50. Not something I would do every day, but for 24 hours, it works out great.

    • I take large doses of Vit C, e.g., 500 mg or 1000 mg every hour for 3-4 hours in a row. I haven’t had a full blown cold in two years despite having a kid in day care. Make sure you take it with food or it will upset your stomach. Good luck.

    • Bridget says:

      I have two restaurant recommendations.

      #1. Battista’s http://battistaslasvegas.com This restaurant is awesome. They do a great Prix Fixe meal for under $40 (the least expensive option is about $21) which includes starters, bread, sides, and wine. The atmosphere is cozy, but nice and the food is great.

      #2. Hash House A Go Go. http://www.hashhouseagogo.com/ There are at least two locations in Vegas, but I’ve been only to the one on the second floor of the Imperial Palace on the Strip. It might seem pricier than some of the buffet options out there, but the food is excellent (“twisted farm food”), the atmosphere is clean and comfortable, and the portions are crazy big – a plus if you are staying in a room with a fridge and can save your leftovers.

      I hope you feel better and enjoy the hell out of your weekend! (I’ve never used one personally, but I hear a neti pot can do wonders for sinus related issues. I think most major pharmacies sell them)

    • lucy stone says:

      My cure a few weeks ago for the head crud was:

      Ginger tea with honey and a True lemon packet (as much as you can drink)
      the good Mucinex
      Ibprofen

    • Anon for this says:

      Zicam (or the generic works just as well). You take at the “first sign” of a cold and it supposedly shortens the duration and the severity of a cold. I had that crud two weeks ago (I get it about twice a year) and this was the first time I took Zicam. I felt like it definitely helped, but it could just be the placebo effect. ;)

  7. Not a lawyer says:

    Just curious if anyone has been following the concerns about copyright violations on Pinterest (in short, pinning or re-pinning without providing a link back to the original source). I’m embarrassed that until recently, I hadn’t considered this. I’ve combed through my boards and deleted everything that linked to a random Google image or other un-credited source. Luckily, I found only three images that didn’t have an original source, but I’m a little wary about using Pinterest until it buttons up its user policy. At the very least, I think it should provide stricter guidelines about what’s OK vs. what’s stealing. I’d love to hear a lawyer’s take on this. It seems Pinterest has tried to put the onus on its users to ensure copyrights aren’t being violated, but what is the site’s responsibility?

    Link with love dot typepad dot com has an interesting Pinterest Project going on to encourage people to slow down and credit their sources when repinning.

    • DC anon says:

      I don’t know much about Pinterest, but doesn’t it automatically link back to wherever you got the image?

      • Not a lawyer says:

        Yes, but the problem is when somebody links to a Google or Yahoo image, because then the link sends you back to that image, not the website from which the image originated.

    • PharmaGirl says:

      I’m vigilant about linking to the original source when pinning and repinning, mostly because I hate clicking through someone’s pins only to find the link goes to a random google image. Not helpful!

      I’ll be interested to see the legal opinions on copyrights and ownership of products.

    • Scully says:

      Crediting a source does not provide any real protection from a copyright claim (unless the author has an attribution license- search “creative commons” if you are interested in learning more). It’s the actual copying/display of the image that is the violation. That said, if you are just a regular user pinning random stuff, the odds you will be sued are pretty low. Now if you are a company with a board displaying other’s IP, it’s prob. a different story.

      • Exactly says:

        The crux of copyright infringement is using the image without permission, not using the image without attribution.

        • Anonforthis says:

          But here’s what I don’t get ~ what does “using” mean? You’re basically publishing a link to the image’s source that displays a small thumbnail, just like Google Images does when you run a search. Pinterest just seems like a shorthand way to say, “Hey, internet friends, I found this cool picture, here’s a link to it.” That doesn’t strike me as using.

          • Copyright Act says:

            Subject to sections 107 through 122, the owner of copyright under this title has the exclusive rights to do and to authorize any of the following:

            (1) to reproduce the copyrighted work in copies or phonorecords;
            (2) to prepare derivative works based upon the copyrighted work;
            (3) to distribute copies or phonorecords of the copyrighted work to the public by sale or other transfer of ownership, or by rental, lease, or lending;
            (4) in the case of literary, musical, dramatic, and choreographic works, pantomimes, and motion pictures and other audiovisual works, to perform the copyrighted work publicly;
            (5) in the case of literary, musical, dramatic, and choreographic works, pantomimes, and pictorial, graphic, or sculptural works, including the individual images of a motion picture or other audiovisual work, to display the copyrighted work publicly; and
            (6) in the case of sound recordings, to perform the copyrighted work publicly by means of a digital audio transmission.

            17 U.S.C. Section 106.

            I’ve never seen Pinterest, but I expect it implicates exclusive rights 1, 3 & 5.

            It probably doesn’t strike you as using because you believe that the use is a fair use or that the use is de minimus, both of which are defenses to copyright infringement.

          • Scully says:

            Check out Perfect 10 v. Amazon for the 9th Cir.’s ruling re: Google Image thumbnails. I think cert. was recently denied by the Supreme Court. The thumbnails were fair use because they were transformative; the purpose of the thumbnails was for directing web traffic/search instead of artistic. You can certainly argue pinning on Pinterest maintains the artistic purpose of the image, so you would have to look at the other fair use factors.

          • Lynnet says:

            The google images question has been tested in court: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Perfect_10,_Inc._v._Amazon.com,_Inc.

  8. Herbie says:

    Someone must have notified the universe that I’m trying to get out of the office tomorrow. All hell has broken loose, and I am busier today than I’ve been in weeks. WTF, Universe, srsly fo’ realz.

    • TCFKAG says:

      Herbie, may I introduce you to Murphy? He has this Law — and I think you’re learning a little something about it today.

    • I am right there with you. For WEEKS I’ve been trying to piece together billables. Today? Husband’s car died at lunch. I need to leave at 4pm to go buy a replacement (luckily we’d already been looking/negotiating, and just need to finalize a deal).

      Since this happened roughly 4 hours ago, I’ve gotten three new assignments. Dear Universe: STOP IT.

    • Diana Barry says:

      Yes. Universe also knows that I am going on maternity leave in 3.5 weeks (aaaaaaahhhh!) and has chosen this moment to drop 5 new clients in my lap. WTF???

    • ME TOO! Was supposed to leave work at 3:30 for daughter’s MD app’t, ended up leaving at 2:30 after daughter got home to find doggy diarrhea with a little bit of blood (just a virus most likely according to vet – phew). Then get to daughter’s 4:45 app’t, sit in waiting room until 5:15. Husband met me on random road to exchange daughter at 5:30. Then get to class at 6:25 an hour away, oh yeah and I need gas!!!!! Fortunately universe gave me no traffic and I was only 10 minutes late for class.

  9. Monday says:

    Well, I wore orange lipstick to work today. It was new, and I tried it on in the morning because I couldn’t wait. My intention was to wash it off before I left, but as I got dressed I thought “eh, I’m leaving it on.”

    It might qualify as advanced Corporette trolling if I had any female coworkers to see it…but as it is, I might just do it again.

    PS–was my outfit subdued to compensate? No. Do I “know my office”? Yes, and this was totally inconsistent with our norms.

    • I have no discipline when it comes to lipstick so I hardly ever remember to put it on and usually just stick to gloss that I can just apply without a mirror, but lately I have been putting on “fun” lipsticks for my commute to work – I figure most of it comes up with my morning coffee and certainly by the time I have to do anything meaningful around 10:30, but this way I still get to do something fun. This morning was a bright dark pink. An orange lipstick sounds awesome. I applaud you.

      • Monday says:

        If your SO hates lipstick as much as mine does, that also makes your routine a good compromise.

        Not sure how tonight is going to go! It could be that this lipstick is actually more welcome in my office than it is in my home ;)

        • But you’re getting him flowers, no? How can he object to lipstick when posies are involved? Fooey on that, I say. Rock the orange with pride :)

          • Monday says:

            Awww. So glad I’m not the only one who keeps track of details from post to post! As it has been famously termed: “FREINDS on this web sight!!!”

            I will let you know how it goes :)

    • I wore black leather pants. Granted, it’s spring break and I saw only one student and probably two other people, but if you wish to feel more appropriate and better-dressed than someone, I’m happy to be your gal.

      • Monday says:

        +1 million Monday points, especially since I work at a university as well. I would die if one of my students saw me in leather pants.

        • Yes, that is truly amazing.

          • TCFKAG says:

            I had a (male) professor in college who would occasionally wear leather pants to teach class. But he was a self-professed Marxist…so we all kind of thought it came with the territory. :-)

        • So far, only my kid’s friend’s mom and my kid’s teacher, both of whom saw me at elementary school this morning, have commented. Both thought I looked good. Plus the pants fit and I am cultivating my tough/eff you persona today, so even if I look dreadful I feel tough and awesome.

          • Monday says:

            Oh, I don’t doubt that you do look good! I’d be hoping against hope that we were colleagues, but my university’s spring break has been over for a while. Alas, the campus I rocked today is not the same as the campus you rocked today.

    • Can you link to the orange lipstick? I’d love to see it. Was it really bright?

      • Monday says:

        The color is called “Day Lily” (Shiseido):

        http://sephora.com/browse/product.jhtml?categoryId=A17&id=P233108

        On me, it was actually not very bright. It’s creamy and fairly sheer, with a bit of sheen. I saw this one, liked above, recommended for those of us with “Snow White” coloring. I’m happy with it on me, but may need to adjust my blush.

        For a brighter, more matte version, I’ve been recommended Mac “Morange,” Bobby Brown Orange, and I’m also trying Makeup Forever Rouge Artist Intense (lipstick) #40.

        • Ooh – pretty! It sort of reminds me of the new Sephore + Pantone lipstick, which I have been coveting: http://sephora.com/browse/product.jhtml?id=P307536&categoryId=RVP

          Has anyone tried this one?

          • Pretty! Probably doesn’t hurt I’m a bit Pantone “Color of the Year” obsessed…

          • Okay, so after this discussion I had to go to Sephora and lo and behold, they had the Pantone lipstick (my Sephora is tiny and terrible, thus the amazement). Anyway, I tried it and it was….not for me. It was very coral-y, which does not work with my skin tone. So I bought orange nail polish (Nails Inc. Portobello) instead. :)

        • Love it! I have never tried on anything like that, but I always think it looks so cool on others.

    • This whole thing just made me want to buy a new lipstick.

      • Eloise Speghetti says:

        I have no discipline when it comes to lipstick. But this also makes me want to just walk into Sephora and tell them to teach me.

  10. I’m not sure I like this suit, but was in BB yesterday and they had some really gorgeous things. Specifically, a seer sucker dress that I am itching to get (waiting for a promo) and really pretty lilberty print shirts and dresses – I am a sucker for a good floral. They also had a great beige suit with simple white piping that was just gorgerous in person (http://www.brooksbrothers.com/IWCatProductPage.process?Merchant_Id=1&Section_Id=374&Product_Id=1665070&Parent_Id=1034&default_color=BROWN&sort_by=&sectioncolor=&sectionsize=#null) and a few other suits/blazers that are not showing up online for some reason.

  11. just Karen says:

    Does anyone have any recommendations for places to stay/things to do in Belize and/or Guatemala? It’s time to plan my honeymoon (ok, probably past time to plan it – the wedding less than six weeks away).

    • Where are you going in Belize? I went to Ambergris Caye with my husband a few years ago, and it was gorgeous. We stayed on the North side of the island (above the bridge), and it was very quiet and peaceful, but a little bit of a hike to get to most of the restaurants and bars. If you decide to stay on the North side, I’d definitely recommend renting a golf cart for the time that you’re there, and also bringing flashlights/headlamps! They were crucial because the streets weren’t always well lit. Also, Ambergris didn’t have white sandy beaches (not sure if you’re expecting that). I’m not sure what the beaches off the mainland are like.

      Scuba diving in Belize is amazing. I highly recommend getting certified – you can do the online PADI training, and then complete the dives with one of the PADI shops on the island. Snorkeling doesn’t even compare.

    • karenpadi says:

      Do you scuba dive? If so, I’ll dig up some recommendations for Belize–I did a lot of research a one point but never went.

      My piece of paradise on Earth is in nearby Honduras–Bananarama Resort on Roatan. I’ve been there 3 times, going back in 3 weeks (squee!) and I keep adding to my entourage since going there solo three years ago.

      • Anon because this identifies me – my husband is an avid scuba diver. He absolutely adores Roatan and keeps trying to get us to go visit for a month… or six… He also lived in Guatemala for a substantial time doing NGO-type work – much of Guatemala is quite poor and rough, if not downright dangerous. Be very careful with your money and your safety, and whom you trust/hire in Guatemala. However, Antigua, Guatemala is on our short list for vacation destinations – beautiful and relatively inexpensive. Also, while Tikal is a huge PITA to get to, he says it is absolutely amazing.

        • ETA: I didn’t mean to be so negative on Guatemala. My husband enjoyed his work there, really liked the people and the rich culture. And Tikal is absolutely amazing. He really wants to return on vacation, but only to select locations. There’s just not a lot of infrastructure or government services, including police, there, and that has natural consequences regarding safety and security. I’m bad-neighborhood-in-urban-America street savvy, but he isn’t willing to take me to most places in Guatemala.

          • Will second that. I haven’t been to Guatemala myself, but one of my good friends from college spent quite a bit of time there doing NGO stuff as well. She said it was breathtakingly beautiful and that she met some amazingly inspirational people, but that it was rough, rough, rough. Extremely minimal infrastructure (roads or other forms of transportation, electricity, trash collection, potable water), almost no law or order (and what there was, was mostly corrupt), and that she felt unsafe whenever her group was traveling from village to village. This girl has b*lls of steel and has worked quite a bit in the developing world, so I would take her experience to heart. I will grant that she was in the interior hinterlands, not anyplace coastal or remotely touristy, but if you’re doing Guatemala–be extremely mindful.

    • Anon for this says:

      Regular poster here – we stayed at Victoria House on Ambergris for part of our honeymoon (2008) and loved it. Far enough from “downtown” San Pedro that it was quiet, but easy to go in for dinner. Very clean and nicely decorated/landscaped, and the pool lounges are the most comfortable I’ve ever used! Recommend the rooms in the main building for slightly better A/C power than the individual “casitas,” as well as bathroom privacy (in the casitas, the bathroom walls go up to 7-8′ but the thatched roof is much taller…)

      As far as excursions – went and saw the Xunantunich ruins (near Guatemala border), did cave tubing (SO SO refreshing after the ruins), and did two snorkeling trips (I forget the names now, but one was to a nurse shark area and another to a marine reserve).

    • No suggestions, other than to say that you may want to check out the current crime issues in Guatemala. This is entirely based on hearsay – was at dinner the other night, suggested Guatemala to a friend considering a babymoon (as another friend had loved her visit there a few years ago), and was told that it had already been considered and nixed bc of the current state of things – a lot of violent crime, apparently. Sorry to be a downer (and again – this is entirely based on a recent dinner conversation, could be false – you just may want to check the state department website before booking!).

      • Guatemala is, unfortunately, quite dangerous right now. A dear family friend was killed, and his wife severely injured, during a robbery on their sailboat while they were docked in a port in Guatemala last year. And such incidents weren’t uncommon, as the family was told when they flew down there to be with the mom and work through all the medical and legal issues.

    • Bridget says:

      What do you have in mind? Beach or jungle? My sister and I went to Belize a few years ago and LOVED it. We chose to stay on Caye Caulker (rather than Ambergris) for the small-town, laid-back atmosphere. The town was seriously about three streets wide. We stayed in a guest house (I don’t think there are any hotels on the island) and really enjoyed ourselves. Took day trips snorkeling, diving, and to Ambergris. Ate at the little restaurants and drank at the local bars. Spent the evenings watching a local pick-up basketball tournament and dancing in tiny bars.

      The second half of the trip was even better. We stayed in a jungle lodge that offered daily excursions such as spelunking in Mayan caves, rapelling, tubing, overnight or day jungle walks, ziplines, a trip into Guatemala to see Tikal … It was fabulous. The place we stayed at was called Caves Branch, and we loved it. It’s not super-romantic and private, but it was awesome. The food is all provided in a communal hall where people hang out and play card games after dinner. There is a variety of lodging from a dorm to fancy tree houses — maybe you’d want to do the latter.

    • Pippit says:

      Fantastic choice!

      the diving is wonderful, and very civilized. The beach (from Ambergris Caye) is only about a 15 minute boat ride from the reef, so you’ll come back to land (and bathrooms) for the surface interval. There are several dive shops in San Pedro (on Ambergris Caye). Most of them are large and take big groups, very professional. However, for a fantastic, tailored experience, I highly recommend Patojo’s dive shop (I think it’s outside a hotel called the Tides). Patojo is fantastic, and you’ll get wonderful, personalized trips. I have a framed photo his dive master took of me, standing on the bottom, holding a shark! (I’m generally against touching the wildlife, but when someone hands you a shark, you just automatically take it and hold on tight)

      Also, I’d recommend spending some time inland (it’s not really that far from one side of the country to the other). I had a wonderful time in San Ignacio, near the border to Guatemala- you can do several Mayan sites from there, including a day trip to Tekal, in Guatemala (some people stay overnight- it’s supposed to be fantastic in the morning, with the birds and monkeys), and a hiking/swimming/spelunking/rock scrambling trip to see the “crystal maiden” in Actun Tunichil Muknal (ATM).

      I think the south also has many sights worth seeing, but I didn’t make it down very far.

      Have a wonderful time!

      • Gail the Goldfish says:

        I also stayed up in the mountains near San Ignacio and took a day trip to the ruins at Tikal. I have heard the coast/scuba diving is beautiful, though

        If you like outdoorsy things, I was there specifically for a horseback riding trip (through Equitours) and stayed at Mountain Equestrian Trails (if you google Mountain Equestrian Trails Belize or MET Belize, it should come up). They also do things other than horseback riding (caving and hiking, maybe?). It’s a bit rustic in the sense there’s no electricity in the cabins (at least there wasn’t when I went, which was I think 2005, so maybe they’ve added it), but I found it otherwise nice and very relaxing when your only light options after sunset are to go to the cabana and have electricity or use gas lanterns, actually.

    • qwerty says:

      My husband and I did a NCL mayan riviera cruise as part of our honeymoon and Santo Thomas de Castilla in Guatemala was one of our stops. We did the typical shore excursion. The local tour guide recommended that we visit Los Delfines, a restaurant in Puerto Barrios (20 minute cab ride from our cruise ship) for good food. We were the only ones in the large group who were intrigued. We hired a cab to take us there, wait for us, and then bring us back for about $50. The restaurant was large and empty at lunch time on a weekday (except for a few local construction workers who were taking a leisurely lunch and (I think) celebrating a birthday).
      The restaurant had the most breathtaking outdoor space I’ve ever seen. Right on the ocean, fishies swimming up the restaurant, could see the cruises docking in the distance and banana cargo getting loaded into closer ships. Absolutely peaceful. It was the most relaxing meal of my life (and the food was good too!). I’d go back just to visit that restaurant again. now I’m hungry…

    • I eloped in Belize several years ago and loved it. Right after our wedding, we stayed on a private island for several nights (it had 4 small cabins, I think, but we were the only ones there besides the caretaker). It was awesome. Booked through the Inn at Roberts Grove, in Placencia. (leaving out links to avoid moderation). It was fairly rustic, but totally affordable and a great way to completely get away from it all.

      We also stayed at two of the Francis Ford Coppola resorts – Blancaneaux (jungle/mountain) and Turtle Inn (beach). They were amazing – service was impeccable and we still talk about the spa treatments. Only downside is that the restaurants are Italian-themed, so you need to plan on eating elsewhere for a few nights.

    • No advice on Belize or Guatemala, but just wanted to say that we planned our honeymoon about a month out and had a wonderful time :) It really is more about getting away together and decompressing after the wedding. So don’t stress. (I realize that you didn’t say you were stressed, but I was stressed.)

      • qwerty says:

        i agree 100%. we aren’t cruise people (we’re more backpack to the end of the earth and shop at flea markets have great food and meet fun people along the way types) but went the cruise route because it was easy. we wouldn’t have to plan much and the whole goal was just to spend time together and recover from the wedding madness

  12. Scully says:

    Love this suit! I want to wear it with a bright scarf and pumps. Maybe a chunky bracelet.

    And a quick thread jack:
    Any recs for a dentist in Philly/Cherry Hill?

    • Yes! See my dentist (full disclosure: personal friend, I her see every week) Dr. Cynthia Hou at the Penn Dental Faculty Clinic. She practices at 34th & Market. She’s brilliant — the one that manages to help the clinic avoid lawsuits when all other dentists in the clinic screw up treatment on angry patients — and an awesome, friendly person as well. Their number is 215-573-8400.

      • Oooh, I should say that not all the other dentists in the faculty clinic screw up treatment — just that she fixes everything wrong ever that the ones that actually do screw up treatment due to neglect or other reasons. She’s really good and passionate about being an excellent and caring dentist — I know I’m biased because she’s my friend but I really think you’ll be happy if you see her.

    • are you in Center City? the dentist’s office in the 1818 Market building (on the ground floor, behind the lobby reception) is prompt and nice for my regular cleanings, though fortunately I have no basis for an opinion on more complicated work.

    • Scully says:

      Yep, I’m in Center City. Thanks for the recs!

    • Dr. Lynn Andreacola on 73 in Mr. Laurel (across from the Whole Foods) is fantastic. She’s the only dentist I’ve ever seen. Top-notch dental care and a great office atmosphere.

  13. A Tree Grows in... wait... where am I? says:

    Hi! First time thread jacker, long time Corporette stalker. I’m curious if any Corporettes reside abroad. I’ve moved back to “mainland” US after living for 6 years on an island US territory. It was a wonderful experience, but I had to return to the states to pursue professional opportunities as there is only so much upward mobility on an island. Well, I’ve been back for about a year and made great professional strides (I’m a Project Manager). Unfortunately, I am experiencing wanderlust once more. I’m seriously considering another move in the next year or two. I’m leaning towards Spain or South America (Argentina perhaps?) as I speak some Spanish and appreciate the culture. However, I would be looking for information from anyone about anywhere really. As I mentioned, I lived in a terriority of sorts, so I wasn’t an expat. I’m sure moving to another country has a completely differenct set of challenges. I realize that this question is a bit broad but I’d like to hear about your personal experiences, gather opinions, and learn about your challenges. My ultimate goal would be to find a place that I can call home (I’ve move often, love travel and yet nothing’s ever felt like home) but in the interim, life is all exploration and seeking new opportunties! So I’m keeping my bags packed for the next move! So Corporettes, any thoughts?

    • TCFKAG says:

      We have lots of ‘Rettes living abroad — I think England being most well represented (but I know we have Morocco and most of your European countries, not sure about South America).

      Good luck in your plans! I’m jealous. :-)

    • No specifics but I cannot express how much I love Spain. It’s one of the few places I would ever consider leaving NYC for.

    • ChinaRette says:

      Hi, Tree…! Long-time lurker and first-time commenter, here. Sorry for the long reply below. Actually I live abroad right now (Asia). True “expat”–I came here, found a job, been working for about 2.5 years at a wonderful organization. I understand your wanderlust! I love living over here, but there are a few things to consider:

      (1) Working visas: not sure about S. America, but I know in Europe and in several Asian countries it is getting tougher to get a work visa. The country I am in requires two years of full-time work experience and “qualifications” for the job as a minimum, and I’ve still heard of people who get turned away even with a job in hand. From friends in Europe, I’ve heard that EU countries are also tightening policies since domestic unemployement is so high in those countries. And do NOT go to work without a proper work visa–that would leave you with absolutely no legal recourse if your company screws you out of pay, etc. Not to mention it’s illegal and could get you permanently kicked out of a country!
      (2) Pay is probably lower and mobility is more limited when you’re working abroad. There are fewer opportunities for expatriates unless you either have some amazing, super-specialized skill that the country is lacking or you have high-level language skills and a strong career direction. It can be limiting because you have to take what you can get to a certain extent. Entrepreneurs seem to be the exception to this rule. I’ve seen expatriate entrepreneurs carve a niche and do well abroad. And even if you do have some useful skills, pay will be MUCH lower than the U.S. In Europe it will be about the same or higher, but generally speaking cost of living is much higher there.
      (3) Stability is lacking–you say you want to settle down, but life abroad involves facing constant change! We’re on “generation 3.0″ of our friends because people are constantly moving in and out. I live here with my husband so we’ve carved out a nice life for ourselves, with an apartment we love and a tightknit group of friends, but it can be tough when friends move in and out constantly. In Asia people switch jobs frequently so you might be changing once a year.

      I hate to sound like a Debbie Downer! I’ve loved my time abroad and think it was the right way to start my career. I’ve had some amazing experiences, greatly improved my language level, and made friends I never would have met in the U.S. But thinking about the cut in earnings I’ve taken, as well as the lack up upward career mobility, makes me ready to move back. Truthfully speaking, it’s harder to get career momentum abroad unless you’re sent over here on a corporate assignment.

      • A Tree Grows in... wait... where am I? says:

        ChinaRette – thank you so much! You’re not a Debbie Downer at all… I appreciate your honest assessment and will take everything you’ve mentioned into consideration.

        I’ve only just begun seriously considering expat life. Judging from the information you’ve provided, I have not done as much research about work visas as necessary. I’ll have to look into that aspect much more.

        I appreciate the information about pay as well, although I did anticipate less pay – but perhaps that cut is greater than I thought. Hmmm…

        Oh, and as far as friends are concerned, I’m a former military brat/military service-woman who’s moved a bunch. Sadly I’m used to friends coming in and out of my life. I do my best to keep in touch but hey, sometimes people are in our lives for a season… blah blah blah. :P I would however like to have start a family someday so I suppose having a sense of community is something I should start taking into consideration. It would be tough to develop a sense of community with people coming and going all the time.

        It’s funny how I find myself making concessions for “family” as a single woman with no prospective boyfriends – let alone a baby’s daddy! :P Oh well, a girl can dream…

        Thanks again for all the excellent advice!!

    • No suggestions, but some commiseration. I spent two years on a sort-of US Territory Island and I constantly yearn to go back. Island life is something special, isn’t it?

      • A Tree Grows in... wait... where am I? says:

        Island life is very special. I share your yearning and hope to go back eventually – probably retirement. Deciding to leave was a difficult decision but I feel its been worth it.

    • A Tree Grows in... wait... where am I? says:

      Hi Everyone! My comment was stuck in moderation so long that I thought I had lost the opportunity for comments… :( I am so happy that you folks took the time to respond! :D

      • ChinaRette says:

        Happy to help. I’m on the other side of the Pacific, so unfortunately I’m usually at the tail end of all these convos. I think if you really have a dream, go for it! Just be aware of what you’re getting yourself into.

    • in-House Europe says:

      I can only recommend it – I have a bit of wanderlust myself and have lived on both coasts of the US and in Asia before coming here – and after 15 years of moving I finally feel like I have found a place that feels like “home.”

      Go for it!

      Yes, it is tougher to find jobs, yes, it is tougher in general, but there are so many benefits to being a “citizen of the world.” ;)

      • A Tree Grows in... says:

        Thanks in – House! I’m glad you found “home!” :D

        I agree – there are so many benefits to being a “citizen of the world.” I realize that I am blessed to have been born in the United States and have opportunities in this country that many women don’t have elsewhere – especially as an educated “minority” female. I love my country and have traveled extensively throughout this beautiful nation, but there’s so much of the world to see and life is short! And while learning about life in different locales is wonderful, the best part of traveling in my opinion is seeing just how similar we are regardless of where we live.

        Good stuff! :)

  14. Concerned Friend says:

    All of the relationship tjs have me thinking that maybe you brilliant ladies have some suggestions for me as well.

    One of my very best friends has been with her same SO for a little over 2 years. I met her 6 months after they started dating and can say quite confidently that they never had an easy relationship. Apparently the honeymoon phase was great, but then they ended up moving in together after about 3 months and things started turning south. They lived together for about 3 months and then moved together to another state, where we all live now. They do not live together now. I always thought that she could do much better than the current SO, but now I’m having a hard time wanting to go anywhere where she might bring him and I really really really don’t like him.

    Over the last year and a half I have seen some really low points in their relationship, but have never actually been there for them, although other friends have. For example, last Labor Day, they went away for the weekend to a city about 4 hours away. She drove and when she said she wanted to stop about 15 miles from their ultimate destination, he flew off the handle. He started yelling at her and tried to get out of the car while she was driving. He then yelled at her more for not stopping. At a red light, he got out of the car, told her essentially to f off and then left. She didn’t hear from him the whole weekend. When she got back, she put his things in his car and didn’t respond when he called. Stuff like this happens a lot and they frequently break up then get back together or just stop talking for a while. At no point has anything turned physical, and I know she would tell me, but I believe that he is probably verbally abusing her, or at least on the road there. She justifies it by saying she does it too. In addition to telling her to f off and asking if she is f-ing stupid, he is really good at picking up on things that are really important to her and twisting them to hurt her. This does bother her a lot.

    They broke up most recently the day after Christmas and then didn’t talk for about half of January. She decided that she wanted to try again because she loves him and she is getting old (almost 30, so really, not that old) and he suggested couples counseling for them. At first it wasn’t going that well and he kept canceling. Then I guess he got an earful from the therapist and hasn’t canceled since. She says that since he has been committed to going and recognized that he has an anger problem, it is actually helping. Now they are planning on moving in together again and I just think this is all such a bad idea. I want her to be happy, but I don’t think that he has really changed and maybe will never change.

    Last week, we went out to happy hour and she told me that she loves him, but knows that if she marries him they will end up divorcing. She said that she’s felt this with every boyfriend and that she’s not sure if it’s them or her. I told her it was them. I feel like I’m walking a really fine line between supporting my friend and being tolerant of her SO as long as he is trying to change and flat out telling her (as I have in the past) that I don’t like him, I think she can do better, and there is no reason to settle. She doesn’t seem to remember how miserable she was for most of 2011 because right now things are better.

    What do I tell her? How do I make her see that it’s not ok for either of them to yell and swear like that at each other? How do I communicate to her that its not ok because both of them do it? Is there any way I can make her see that most of our friends think this is a toxic relationship that is ultimately harmful to her? Do I give up and just deal with it? Do I distance myself and wait to see what happens? I really do want to be there for her and continue being friends with her, I’m just sort of at the end of my rope with this.

    • What about just dissuading her from living with him for now. Give her all the great reasons why it makes more sense for them to live apart while they work through their issues. That way you are not bashing him or the relationship but you have a chance to touch on why it might not work out in the long term and how it will be easier if they have separate places.

    • MaggieLizer says:

      I’d ask her if they had discussed moving in together with the therapist (and if they haven’t then suggest very strongly that they do) and leave it at that. It’d be a different story if she didn’t realize that her relationship is unhealthy, or didn’t have another sounding board, but they’re in therapy. I don’t mean this to be harsh and I understand where you’re coming from, but the therapist is more qualified to comment on/guide them in their relationship than you are.

      Often times it’s harder for friends and family to forgive a jerky SO than it is for the person in the relationship, not just because of the bond, but because she can see him changing in ways that you can’t. Be happy and supportive that they’re in therapy, and let her know you’re there for her if she needs someone. I’m sure she’s happy that she has friends who care about her as much as you clearly do.

      • Concerned Friend says:

        I definitely don’t think I’m anywhere near as qualified as the therapist. I just don’t know how to keep my sanity because she always talks about it.

        I did suggest that she see the therapist individually as well as together, and she sounded receptive, but I don’t think it has happened yet.

        • MaggieLizer says:

          Yeah, it’s tough if she’s always bringing it up. I think you have to really set boundaries with her and say, “that’s an excellent thing to bring up with your therapist”, but not offer substantive advice. It’s not fair to either you or her BF for her to use you as an extra therapist – you shouldn’t have that burden and BF should get to explain his side to someone who’s giving her advice about their relationship. Awesome of you to recommend that she gets individual therapy in addition to couples therapy. The position you’re in really sucks, I’m sorry you’re dealing with this.

        • Anonymous says:

          I have an SO that a few of my friends do not like. We just don’t talk about him. I love my girlfriends and they are there for me when I need support, but they no longer give input on him. And I do not ask for advice.

          I had a similar relationship where my colleague/ male friend had an abusive partner. After picking up the pieces and supporting him after 5-6 break-ups, when he went back to her, I just said “OK, that relationship is your choice. but how about you and I don’t talk about her anymore”.

          In both cases, the “don’t ask don’t tell, but I am here to support you in case of emergency” approach seems to work. But it takes biting my tongue a lot!

    • In search of Bunksters bark says:

      Is it her or is it them?

      It IS them, in that their behavior is not her fault or responsibility. But it is HER too in that she keeps picking them and staying with them. I hope she gets help with better choices.

      • THIS! It sounds like individual counseling to help her realize why she is choosing this kind of person might be way more helpful than couple’s therapy.

        • Monday says:

          May I add that even if your friend was 100 years old, she should not settle for being mistreated. I HATE the ubiquitous “time’s a-wastin’! Better hurry up and commit to this wreck of a relationship before I get crow’s feet!”

          • Esquared says:

            Me too! What makes you think you will be better off 10 yrs from now (or less) when things really fall apart? Way better to cut losses now.
            Besides, I’d HATE it if I found out someone was with me because of that, both people deserve to be free to find better people.
            That said, I think that the Anon 7:22pm is probably what I’d do.

          • Concerned Friend says:

            I definitely agree! There is really no reason to settle on this and while some things do get more difficult with age, knowing that you shouldn’t settle isn’t one of them.

          • Anonymous says:

            While it is so bad to blame the victim, the truth is that so many women end up in abusive relationships due to their own upbringing. So, it IS HER, and she needs counseling on her own so that one day she can have a good relationship. So, when your friend asks you if it is him or her, remember to tell her that SHE is the only person who SHE has control over.

    • I agree to not say the whole you don’t like him, etc. because then everything you say is tainted.

      I might suggest sending her one of the healthy/unhealthy relationship quizzes (there are a lot of good ones online) because even when one sees the issues and is upfront about them, sometimes that person doesn’t realize it is abusive if there isn’t physical abuse. You have to do it in a nice way, though, such as if you are talking and something comes up or reference it to another person’s relationship or such. Don’t tell her it is for her; she’ll get it (most likely).

      I further suggest doing this after sitting down with her (go for breakfast or whatever you typically do to talk) and talking about how you are concerned that you may have the wrong understanding (even if you don’t think you do) of the relationship and would like to get to know her SO better. You can say you are concerned and suggest discussing the topic of moving in with the therapist, either alone or together – or, better yet, both. However, emotional abuse is something that the individual has to really realize themselves and it sounds like she hasn’t.

      To give this all credibility, I’m speaking from personal experience here.

  15. Any suggestions for personal finance blogs?

    • Jacqueline says:

      My Open Wallet and Little Miss Moneybags are both great.

    • Esquared says:

      What part of your life are you in?

      • Late 20s.

        • And to elaborate, single, no kids, no debt, working 5 years and just realized that I’ve been blowing a lot of money on nothing and want to learn about saving, investing, etc.

          • Esquared says:

            Figuring out my finances has been my new hobby. ;-)
            I’m in the same boat as you life wise– I find blogs hard to follow because they are really piecemeal. And most finance books are way beyond what I need at this point in my life. A book I found really helpful for our age group is- http://www.amazon.com/Will-Teach-You-Be-Rich/dp/0761147489 . It is all about automating savings. He does have a blog and youtube pg that there is great info on it to (I linked to it below for info on negotiation), but once again it is all over the place.
            I don’t know if you have school debt, but I just applied the chapter on credit card debt (which I don’t have) to school debt. I also liked it because it have very specific things to do each week.
            On the same philosophy but more advanced, I also feel like David Bach has some great stuff (in books & on his blog). Here’s a youtube vid of his that kind of explains his theory- http://www.finishrich.com/blog/the-1-financial-mistake-to-avoid-and-how-to-fix-it-in-less-than-an-hour/ .
            Both of the people above are WAY into self promotion & selling their selves, books, services, whatever… but I think if you can look beyond that, they both have great info.
            I have yet to find anything useful on dailyworth… which makes me way sad.

    • Esquirette says:

      I found the Bogleheads website several months ago and was really impressed. It’s not a great looking website, and you kind of have to get a feel for what’s going on, but there was so much clear and helpful information there. Look for the standing articles on various topics rather than the posting board. Bear in mind, most of the information is consistent with a certain investment strategy (and is very pro-Vanguard) but it’s hardly one I’d discredit! The articles explained things in a way I could understand and even made basic recommendations.

    • Bluejay says:

      Get Rich Slowly!

    • Amy H. says:

      Seconded for My Open Wallet, Little Miss Moneybags and Get Rich Slowly.

      The Simple Dollar is also good, although that blog author is a guy in his 30′s who is married with kids so some posts will be inapplicable to you . . . for the basics on saving and investing, though, the fundamental principles won’t change.

  16. A Tree Grows in... wait... where am I? says:

    This may appear twice since I ended up in moderation… :(

    First time thread jacker, long time Corporette stalker. Curious if any Corporettes reside abroad. I’ve moved back to mainland US after living for 6 years on an island US territory. It was a wonderful experience, but I had to return to the states to pursue professional opportunities as there is only so much upward mobility on an island. Well, I’ve been back for about a year and made great professional strides (I’m a Project Manager). Unfortunately, I am experiencing a strong desire to travel once more. I’m seriously considering another move in the next year or two. I’m leaning towards Spain or South America (Argentina perhaps?) as I speak some Spanish and appreciate the culture. However, I would be looking for information from anyone about anywhere really. As I mentioned, I lived in a terriority of sorts, so I wasn’t an expat. I’m sure moving to another country has a completely differenct set of challenges. I realize that this question is a bit broad but I’d like to hear about your personal experiences, gather opinions, and learn about your challenges. My ultimate goal would be to find a place that I can call home (I’ve move often, love travel and yet nothing’s ever felt like home) but in the interim, life is all exploration and seeking new opportunties! So I’m keeping my bags packed for the next move! So Corporettes, any thoughts?

    • Esquared says:

      I did an internship in Argentina a few yrs back… it was amazing & would be happy to answer questions about living there & what not.
      I’m someone that always has wanderlust… I didn’t leave the country in 2011 and it was the first time in probably 2 decades.
      Email: ESQuaredM21 at gmail

      • A Tree Grows in... wait... where am I? says:

        Thanks so much Esquared! I would love to find out more about Argentina. I will get in definitely get touch with you.

  17. recs for Greece says:

    We’re going to Greece on honeymoon in August (I know, not the ideal time to go to Greece, but thats when our wedding is and our honeymoon is my one chance to take a longer vacation). Currently our tenative itinerary is Athens, Santorini and Mykonos. I think I’ve found good hotels in all those places (in the Plaka neighborhood of Athens, Oia in Santorini and Ornos in Mykonos) but suggestions are welcome. Anyone have any thoughts on those areas/towns or recommendations for restaurants and/or activities to do? We don’t drink and are not club/bar people, but we really like good food, beaches and swimming pools, and especially beautiful views, and of course anything romantic is good since its our honeymoon =)

    Related, we are planning to take ferries between all three destinations. I’ve heard that the ferries can be unreliable and regularly cancel, but I’ve also heard that is much less likely to happen in August since its peak travel season. The hotels are all non-refundable if you cancel within a couple days of arrival, obviously, and it would be a big bummer to miss a day in the islands (or even worse, to miss our return flight home), so I’m really curious about the likelihood of cancellation and/or alternative options of getting somewhere if the ferry is cancelled. We are also looking into travel insurance, so we don’t feel sad about losing a night of hotel already paid for. We chose ferries over flying because of safety issues and to a lesser degree cost, but I’m anxious about cancellation, so any advice would be appreciated!

    • elle woods says:

      I loved Taverna Elia in Santorini for food when I went there a few years ago! Santorini is great! Have fun!

    • Anastasia says:

      Santorini is wonderful (although the nightlife is decent; I don’t remember any names specifically, sorry), and I would have LOVED to just spend a week there relaxing instead of going to Athens. Especially since August was hot and crowded and a lot of the ruins were being “restored” and had scaffolding all over them. That was a few years ago; I’m not sure if it’s still in progress. On Santorini: Hike the volcanoes, wander the city, maybe bike around the island – it’s really interesting scenery – but I’d pass on the “hot” springs… you will come out orange and smelling like sulfur, and since they are instantly mixing with the ocean water (at least the one I went to), they’re not even that hot.

    • My husband and I went to Greece (Mykonos, Santorini, and Athens) last August. It was beautiful then, and not too crowded. Athens is majorly overrated, in my opinion. We only spent one night there, and had a full day to sight see. Note that several of the museums close early, like at 4:30pm. The hike up the hill of the Acropolis to the Parthenon will likely be blazing hot in August, so come prepared. It’s worth it, though. Instead of getting a tour guide, we downloaded the free Rick Steves audioguide to Athens (available as an App), which was very convenient to play on our Iphones during the walk through the historic sites.

      Santorini is paradise. I’m glad you’re staying in Oia, the sunset side –we did, too–and it was perfect. There is a fabulous restaurant in a small village near Oia (Finikia) called “Finikia’s Place,” where we ate two nights in a row! I recommend the baby goat dish and the pasta and salads. Make sure you get to see the blue domes and take the famous photographs. The best way to do this is to travel village by village (Fira, the main town) all the way up to Oia, stopping at Imerovigli, Firostefani, Pyrgos, etc. I recommend renting a car to get around Santorini–it’s quite navigable, but to really see the villages on the caldera side, the many wineries, and the black sand Kamari beach, you will want a car. (Unless your hotel has frequent shuttles). When we rented, they only had stick shifts the day-of, but you should be able to arrange for an automatic transmission with your hotel.

      Mykonos is a party island, and a very different (but still fun!) experience than Santorini. If you don’t drink and aren’t party people, then skip the Paradise and SuperParadies beaches. Focus more on the quieter beaches. I recommend taking the ferry on a day trip to Delos (you can sign up the day before once you arrive on the island). [http://gogreece.about.com/cs/cycladicislands/a/mykonosdelos.htm] For food, I recommend Taverna Nicholas near Agia Anna beach, and any of the restaurants in the Little Venice section of town. We spent our three days relaxing at the beach, taking a day trip to Delos, walking around Mykonos town, and eating amazing greek salads. The shopping along the harbor is great but can be expensive. I found several nice souvenirs (like tapestry pillow cases to hang or use–with handmade scenes from Greece) there.

      As far as transportation between islands, we took a plane to Mykonos (we were traveling from Italy) and a ferry between Mykonos and Santorini, then a flight back to Athens. The ferry was just fine. I didn’t get sea sick, and while it arrived about an hour late, was a decent way to travel between the islands. I wouldn’t worry too much about taking ferries. Make sure you’re on the high speed FlyingCat4 catamarans, though, and not the smaller ones.

      Hope that helps. You will love Greece!

      • You only need 2 days in Athens, max 3. NOT a pleasant city at all. It’s really had to find food above mediocre in quality at all price levels.
        I strongly recommend a short trip to Delphi – it’s a magical, ancient place of incredible beauty. It is hot on the mainland in August, but the memories will totally make up for it. JMHO, YMMV.
        If you are not into parties, why go to Mykonos at all? There are plenty of islands with good beaches and authentic food. Consult Tripadvisor and Rick Steves’ books or more upscale travel guides for the itinerary suggestions.
        If you plan to take ferries, pack something for motion sickness – pills or seabands.

    • Dh and I did a similar trip in 2006 (Athens, Santorini, Mykonos), which we loved, and decided to go back in 2010 just to Santorini. Plaka is a good central location in Athens. We stayed at the Brown and Ochre hotel and it was perfect. As a pp mentioned, you really don’t need more than a day in Athens to check out the museums and the Acropolis.

      Glad you decided to stay in Oia, Santorini. I highly recommend Oia – gorgeous, and more quaint/romantic than Fira. Take the stairs down to Ammoudi Bay and eat some fresh fish (its a lot of stairs down to the bay and back up, but if you’re in relatively good shape its no problem). We had the best dinner of our trip at a restaurant called the Red Bicycle. Amazing view too. We drove to the black beach one day (I think it was called Kamari), and took a catamaran tour that we really enjoyed.

      The first time we went, we took ferries Athens –> Santorini –> Mykonos. I am afraid of flying, so I wanted to avoid small planes if possible. We did encounter some rough seas and delays. It really only put us behind by half a day, but it was really inconvenient, and the ferries just felt like they took FOREVER. I would be especially wary of ferries with the bad economy and possible strikes. The second trip we took, we flew directly to Santorini from Athens. The flight was so short and easy. It saved us 10 + hours of travel time and was totally worth it.

      Congratulations on your upcoming honeymoon and hope you enjoy your trip!!

  18. qwerty says:

    i bought the j.crew schoolboy blazer in cobalt recently and would love some styling ideas. i initially thought that it would work with some patterned tops with similar hues, but i’m not loving the look. i also think the blazer can skew casual because of the fabric. any way to wear it for work? link will follow!

    • qwerty says:
      • Cute! I’d wear it with navy pants and a light-ish yellow tee. Some cute warm brown shoes and belt. Or maybe a beige/cream/other light neutral dress. Or be daring and wear a colorful pencil skirt and a white top. I think if you keep your lines clean and accessories classic, you’ll be just fine for non-suit day in the office.

    • Would look darling with a pale yellow dress or a white top/pale yellow skirt and nude heels (don’t go too bright on the yellow or you’ll look like a Michigan fan or one of those leap day people from the 30 rock episode a couple weeks ago :) ). Also search to see if there’s a post about the blazer on jcrewaficionada dot com or gigisgoneshopping; they always have styling suggestions!

  19. So, fellow ‘rettes, I need some help. I’ve just started at a new firm, after being on my own for about a year. I didn’t do much for myself income-wise, but I had a blast working for non-profits and participating in lots of outdoor activities that I love and helping with my husband’s business, which was super busy. Before I took the time off, I was working for a truly awful solo practitioner that nearly worked me to death. Before that, it was mid-law where I was caught up in some lay-offs. This is a small firm, with mid-law pay, and just the 2 partners + me and the legal secretary. It is in an area of law that I have experience and enjoy, and both partners are fantastic! It is almost a mentoring relationship, where my work is reviewed and I am able to become a more nuanced litigator. Things are different all the time, and interesting. I’m in the office from about 7:45ish to between 5:30 and 6, and later only if a deadline is looming. An hour lunch if I want it. Weekends only if prepping for trial.

    I was super up front in the interview, so they know that I participate in a competitive sport outside of work which will (down the road) require a 3 day weekend here and there, and they know we plan to start a family within the next 12 months. Both are a-ok with that so long as I keep up my work. No real “billable” minimum, just a standard of “keep up with what we give you.”

    I have been here for 2 months now, and there is no reason for me not to love it…but for some reason I have a hard time staying motivated and dragging myself out of bed in the morning. Silly, right? Maybe it is left over neurosis from the last 2 firms I was at being awful. I should be grateful, but instead I want to be outside playing…

    • Dahlia says:

      Have you decorated your office yet? I love having a nice(ish) place to work in and it makes going to work much more enjoyable for me.

    • karenpadi says:

      I kind of went through the same thing post-BigLaw where I was bullied. I’m now at a great firm and I had a horrible first six months here–my review was not good and I was far from meeting my billables.

      Are you suffering from anxiety? I used cognitive behavioral therapy to overcome some negative thoughts. Therapists are so helpful.

      Are you making sure you have enough time to rest for your competitive sport? Too much exercise can be draining and harmful to your body. There is nothing wrong with taking a week off of training every few months to allow your body to recuperate.

      Maybe, you realized that work isn’t what really excites you beyond paying the bills. This is a normal reaction after having a horrible job. It does demotivate but it also puts things in perspective. Work is simply not the be-all and end-all anymore.

      Come up with a goal and an exit. My goal was “pay off remainder of student loans in six months and leave”. That turned into “stay a little longer to build up a cushion.” That turned into “I feel really secure here and it’s not so awful anymore, I have a cushion that allows me to leave this job tomorrow but I want to reduce my overall cost of living so that when I leave law I have more freedom. So I’m going to buy a house and pay it off asap.” Now I’m three years in at my firm and, while still burned from my BigLaw experience, it’s a sustainable way of life.

      I have a lot of freedom re: what time I go into the office. If I can’t get out of bed, and I have no meetings, I let myself sleep in and not go into work until 10 or 11.

    • It might be that you’re used to the sort of “threatening” aspect of your previous jobs – i.e., if you didn’t get out of bed in the morning and do your work you knew there might not be a job for you when you went back. Perhaps now that these partners have given you some flexibility, it’s hard to set your own internal goals and boundaries. I think you should start setting certain times that you *must* get things done in the office (e.g., you need to check and respond to your emails by 9 AM every morning) to motivate you to get there. After you get those things done, if you still feel antsy, get up and go to Starbucks or take a walk or something. It helps if you don’t feel like when you go to work you are entering a prison that you can’t get out of all day!

    • I agree with what the others have said about losing motivation after bad work experiences.

      As for building structure and endurance, you might want to try something like The Pomodoro Technique. http://www.pomodorotechnique.com It’s a low-tech and game-like method for training yourself to focus on work.

      It’s especially good for dawdling lawyers. If you do nothing but work on your project during the segments (no phone calls, no personal conversations, no web surfing), you can bill the time without guilt, while developing a realistic idea of how long it takes to complete various tasks, as opposed to how long you think it “should” take.

      • Thank you all for the responses! I’ve backed off some on training for my sport, and that is working well because since it is equestrian – jumping – and I just bought a young one, it is better for her to have pro rides more than ammy (me) rides all the time. I think both of you hit the nail on the head about bad past experiences – the last 2 law firms I was at were definately bullying situations, and now it is basically making my bully myself. For example, even though I am really only expected to be here 8-5:30 unless there is a deadline, I feel myself wanting to push for more. Partially I have that attorney work a holic thing going on, and it feels like left over anxiety from firms that sait “8-6″ but really meant “live here.”

        I am looking at the Pomodoro site now, and I think I will start setting more firm boundaries. Not necessarily to be more productive, because I think I have the problem of being hyper-productive and burning myself out, but to set boundaries like “ok, it is 5:30, unless you have something that has to be done tonight go home!”

        My passion, really, is teaching, and more than that, music and theater. I just helped a good friend from high school start a comedy improv non-profit, and I’m on the board/counsel for that. I think my exit strategy might just be practice law for 5-6 more years, pay off debt, and then maybe move into teaching or this non-profit thing full time. It could happen! And at least it is a long term “dream” that is in the realm of possibility.

  20. wowtdc says:

    Thread jack: Tasked with recommending a conflict check software for my firm for screening potential clients against current/former ones. Does anyone have a recommendation? Thanks.

    • Anon for this says:

      i actually work in conflicts for a law firm and we use Legalkey. It’s all i’ve ever known of conflicts, so i can’t really compare, but it’s pretty easy. some things i’d like to change, but it’d be worth looking at.

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