Coffee Break: Bel Air Two Stone Hinge Bracelet (and Deal Alert: Intermix Sale!)

75 Comments

1. Pretty – and marked down. But also out of stock.

2. Love Alexis Bittar, but I just can’t get on the rose gold train even though I like the way it looks on other people.

   Shopping TJ – I spent 5 hours cleaning out my closet last weekend, and now I’m trying to plug the holes that I’ve discovered so that I can actually wear all of the clothes I own and like (novel concept, I know). I’m looking for a black sheath dress that I can wear to work with blazers or cardigans. I’m thinking high-ish v or scoop neck. Wrinkle is, I’m tall with long legs, and will almost certainly need a “tall” dress for it to be work appropriate.

   Does anyone have the J. Crew Emmaleigh? Is it worth the price? I know their quality can be questionable. Any other suggestions? I’d like to pay under $150, but I could go up to $200 if it would be a real workhorse.

   1. I don’t have the Emmaleigh. Have you checked Zappos or 6pm? I have had some good luck with dresses from there (also terrible luck, but win some, lose some).

   2. I don’t have the Emmaleigh but I do have the Director dress (vneck with cap sleeves) in 2 colors and the Memo dress (vneck with short sleeves). I bought them on sale with an extra % off, around $80 for each one. I think the quality of their Super 120s dresses is fine for $120 and under, but I wouldn’t pay much more than that. I’d wait for the price to drop a bit.

   3. Recently, I have been really disappointed with J.Crew’s quality and refuse to pay full price for anything from J.Crew (wait two weeks and it’s on sale anyway). Check out Ann Taylor dresses – they offer tall sizes, wear well and AT seem to always be running some sort of promotion so I can get two dresses for the price of one!

   4. Amazon has very nice dresses recently. They are getting in to fashion too. Maybe you find something you like there.

   5. I got this dress from Boden about a month ago–click to the photos with the mannequin. It has sleeves, high neck and super-flattering ruching. I love it! Totally worth the price, and comes in tall. I would size DOWN…I am normally a 14 at places like JCrew, Banana and Boden am always a 12.

      http://www.bodenusa.com/en-US/Womens-Dresses/Knee-Length-Dresses/WQ053/Womens-Walbrook-Wool-Dress.html?NavGroupID=4

      This dress is so, super-duper classy though. I will love it for years to come.

      Also cosign Parker regarding JCrew’s horrendous quality in the past year or so.

      1. I LOVE that… sadly, it’s sold out in my size. I’m going to cross my fingers that it comes back – it is absolutely perfect.

      2. Oooooh, I love that dress! So pretty. And it even comes in yellow….

      3. I’m soo tempted by that one. The only thing that is stopping me is that the navy is sold out in my size and I’m not sure I want it in black.

   6. I have the J.Crew Emmaleigh and love it. (I am actually wearing it today). I agree with the others that J.Crew’s quality has declined shockingly over the last several years, but I haven’t seen the same decline in their suiting. I got the dress a year ago and have worn it nearly every week since then, and it looks like new. I also get compliments on it regularly, although I did have it tailored, so it could be the tailoring. Last year I was building a work wardrobe and this dress filled a major hole, so I paid full price. I wear it so often I don’t regret it, but now that I want the grey one I’m waiting for a sale, just because it’s not urgent.

   7. I’m 6′ tall and get sheath dresses from Theory at their outlet store. They’re actually knee-length! It’s great.

      1. +1. Theory makes a sleeveless sheath dress that’s about $300 (check Neiman’s) but well worth the price. The cut is super flattering, it’s long enough for me (5’8″), and it looks great with a blazer or a cardigan.

         1. Just as a counterpoint for the shorter ladies- I find the Theory sheaths much less flattering than the Emmaleigh on myself- the Emmaleigh simply has more space for a bust, and Theory, as a general statement, just isn’t cut in my favour. And I’m 5’2, so when I have a Theory dress shortened, I lose too much of the slit, which makes walking tough, and so Theory is not a win for me. Plus, I find their unlined sheath dresses too scratchy on my skin, and I understand the whole “wear a slip”, but, my arms still touch the outside of my sheath dress throughout the day, and I don’t like it.

   8. I have the Emmaleigh, I don’t think I paid full price for either of mine, but they are definitely workhorses in my closet. I find them a long for my height, so I always order petite ones (I’m 5’2, and the regular ones are definitely below my knee). I’d say that I wear one of them once a week at least, and some weeks I wear both of them.

      I like that I can wear them with the matching blazer, or a contrasting blazer (I have one in a brighter blue), and with a cardigan, etc. And, unlike the memo dress, it’s higher in the front so the bustier among us don’t look inappropriate. It’s a definite win for me.

      1. what blazers do you put with it? i have the emmaleigh(s) too, but have trouble finding anything that goes with it other than the jcrew light cashmere sweater. thanks!

         1. Well, I have the Emmaleigh in the charcoal/gray colour, and it matches the Super 120’s, so I wear it as a dress suit, but I have no qualms about popping on other blazers, like a boiled wool or tweed or a patterned one, so long as the colours are complimentary and the fabrics are sufficiently disimilar that no one thinks I’m trying to “make a suit” out of it. With the brighter blue one, I’ll sometimes wear a navy blazer, but most commonly I use a cardigan.

            I also will put button-downs under the Emmaleigh- I love the look.

   9. Thanks for the advice, everyone! I may wait for a j.crew sale to try the Emmaleigh – it sounds like a workhorse for sure!

      1. Also, might be worth checking eBay. I have a “JCrew tall” recurring search and various work dresses pop up every few weeks.

3. This is beautiful – and I’d have a chance of actually being able to wear it since it’s hinged (large hands, small wrists). That said, it would have to be for completely frivolous occasions. I cannot tolerate large bracelets at work since so much of what I do is at a computer. They irritate me so much!

   1. I’m the same way and even wind up taking off my watch sometimes because it starts to bug me. It’s really too bad because I own some big bracelets that I love but I find myself not wearing them often because I always just wind up taking them off at work.

      1. Yeah, I can’t wear them either. I also have to be careful with earrings as they dig in when I am on the phone.

   2. It’s funny because bangles don’t bother me, although I am typing on a computer 90% of my work day. I don’t like high heels or heavy necklaces, but I’m fine with large bangles. I’m wearing one right now, in fact!

      1. I’m in IT and I wear bangles everyday. I never take them off.

4. Very cute, I LOVE GOLD, but I am NOT a bangle person.

   Robert says he is getting us ticket’s for the Met’s and David want’s to take me OUT to eat. What is it? Is there something in the air? These guy’s have LITERALY come out like insect’s looking to mate? I do NOT want either of them sexueally, so that is OUT, but it is flatering.

   I have alot of work to catch up on and have to be in court TUESDAY. I have return date’s on 3 motion’s and all are contested. The supermarkit cases are NOT simpel b/c they all have counsel, and they are NOT Brian. FOOEY! He is easy to handel.

   I think I got a call from Gonzalo, but I only heard some Spanish peeople talking in the background. That hapened before b/c he has a cheep cell phone that goes on if he sit’s on it or something. It would be funny if his phone called me when his girlfreind grabbed his tuchus. To bad women do NOT do that–men grab womens’ tucheses, but women do NOT grab mens tucheses. I never understood that. FOOEY!

5. What a cool black jacket! I like the contemporary look but not in my size anymore.

6. If you plan your week’s outfits in advance, could you walk me through your process – planning and implementation?

   I think it could really improve my mornings, but I’m struggling with how to start. I know in theory it’s simply picking out five outfits, but I could use help on things like how you organize them during the week, repeating items during the week, accounting for weather and mood, etc.

   1. Planning a week in advance sounds a bit too ambitious to me, unless you have to wear suits every day. Weather forecasts are never perfect, and I know my mood changes day-to-day so I wouldn’t want to lock myself into wearing something I wouldn’t be comfortable in. But I do think picking out something the night before helps a lot. I try to do it after I eat dinner so it doesn’t get so late that I’m just like “well, I’ll do it in the morning….”

      1. Agreed, planning out the entire week’s outfits ahead of time seems a bit much. Frankly, I don’t even lay out clothes the night before (that’s too ambitious for me). But getting dressed is pretty much the very last thing I do in the morning before leaving, so by the time I’m getting dressed I’ve already figured out in my head what I want to wear.

         1. This is what I do. I pick out my outfit mentally while showering or doing makeup/drying my hair. Sometimes the fit of an outfit isn’t quite right though, so I could see trying on things the night before if you’re time crunched in the morning.

            In the rare case I lay out an outfit the night before, I shift the hangers to the front of my closet, place shoes underneath with tights/socks on top, and hang any necklace/scarf on the last top layer’s (blazer, etc) hanger.

            1. I do the same thing. Usually I have an item in mind, e.g. a skirt I have not worn in a while, and put together the outfit while in the shower. The only time I pick out clothes the night before is when I’m in trial. Then I hang everything in the bathroom so I don’t wake up DH.

      2. I don’t think I could do a week at a time either, but I almost always lay out my clothes the night before. Mainly so I can sleep in as late as possible!

         I typically do what no name suggests and take care of laying it all out down to underwear and shoes when I’m changing after work.

      3. This is reassuring. I had thought that planning by week was a common thing, so hearing others say it’s overly ambitious makes me feel better for struggling with it.

         I really *want* it to work, though. Meal planning for the week has improved my quality of life dramatically, and I want this to be similar. I want to pick out all my outfits while the kids are napping on Sunday and coast through the week.

         I don’t have a chance to pick the next day’s outfit until after the kids are asleep and dishes done, which for me is usually well into the “too late, I’ll do it in the morning….” zone. I make it a goal and repeatedly fail.

         1. I don’t always do this but I have phases where I’ll plan outfits for a week, but I just do it mentally and keep the list on my phone. I try to account for what events I may have that week, and it can always change. I don’t save the time in the morning for pulling the items out, but I save time because I know exactly what I’m pulling (the decision factor is what kills me on time anyway). And if there is something unexpected (i.e., salty dinner or not feeling well), then I can always wear Wednesday’s outfit Tuesday, etc. and just swap around but still not have to replan the whole week/make morning decisions. I also have some go -to “I don’t feel well” outfits that are comfier than others.

            Currently, I’m trying to work the uniform look. I love skinny pants and am trying to wear them with different tops/cardigans. That’s a work in progress but I think that will save time too one day if I can get my closet in line with my plan.

   2. When I get home, I take off the outfit I wore to work that day and put the pants (blazer, cardigan, skirt, whatever) back in the closet. While I’m doing that, I pull out what I’m going to wear the next day. I even pull out panties, bra, and socks/hose/or not. I put the shoes near the door.
      Every weekend I do laundry and ironing of anything that needs it.
      I used to be one of those Closet-Full-of-Clothes-Nothing-to-Wear types, but I’ve saved myself so much time and aggro doing it this way.

      1. That sounds workable!

         Closest I come to a “system” is doing laundry on the weekend, making sure appropriate things to wear for the coming week are clean. Pathetic, but I never claimed to be a clothes horse.

   3. Going anon because I’ve recommended this to others IRL…

      I pick out my outfit for the day while I’m in the shower — like roses says, weather and mood and oops I ate a really salty dinner so tomorrow will not work for those pants — but my husband wears a suit every day. What works for him is to have a row of dress shirts, with tie slung around the neck, all in a row, each with a little hole-punched index card dangling from the top of the hanger, that identify which suit that pairing goes with. He still gets to “pick” the outfit each day but it eliminates staring at the tie rack and wondering which one he hasn’t worn in awhile — all the planning is just whether he needs one of his “better” suits on a particular day.

      If you’re more of a “uniform” type dresser (like, blouse and/or sweater plus pants or skirt), this could work for you — using one hanger as a “base,” add sweater, any particular jewelry, hose or underwear, etc, and then “tag” the hanger with the appropriate bottom half. You could put more than one tag on a top, too, so if it’s cold and you don’t want to wear a skirt, the pants combo is already thought about.

      1. This is helpful, thank you. I don’t wear suits, but maybe I could tweak this approach. I like the idea of picking out five on Sunday and picking and choosing through the week. I think coming up with ‘bottom options’ could resolve a lot of mood/weather issues, too.

   4. I don’t necessarily choose all my outfits in advance but I do sometimes mentally plan my outfits if I know I have plans that week. If I’m seeing a friend after work, I tend to dress a little nicer than if I’m just coming home after work and have a quiet day in my office with no meetings or whatever.

      I don’t think I’d like to have all 5 outfits picked out for me in advance, but sometimes it helps me save my nicer blouses or something if I know I have plans on a Thursday, so I don’t wear it on a Monday. So I guess I plan around my social life/meetings at work?

      1. I do this too, I usually double check my calendar and see what’s going on, so I know to wear a plain black sheath on days when I have drinks planned instead of a suit, or wear a more forgiving dress on days when we have lunches at delicious places, suite for “grownup meetings” (as I refer to them them in my head), etc. I generally plan my outfit as I lie in bed for the first 5 minutes of the day, and it’s usually pretty easy for me to sort of mentally think out my week.

         I imagine this system would fall apart rapidly if I had kids or any sort of real responsibilites other than going to work and paying rent.

   5. It shocks me to learn that people go to this much effort.
      I’m sure you look fabulous, and much more put-together than I do.

      I feel like such an under achiever!! :-)

   6. Every Sunday evening I go through the closet and at least try to identify at least ONE item for each day, and ideally an accompanying piece (top and pants, dress and cardigan). I also check my calendar to figure out if one day will require more formality than others. It’s not cast in stone but I find it makes my mornings so much less stressful and vastly reduces vacillating which costs me time.

   7. I do plan my outfits a week in advance. I have a spreadsheet where I write down my outfits for the week. Every Sunday, I write down major Events for every day – imp meetings at work, social plans in the evening, travel, whether I have to walk anywhere etc. And then I quickly look up the weather forecast for each day of that and write down my outfit based on that. I have a tab on the same spreadsheet that lists all the clothes I own so it’s easy to pull together an outfit for each day. It doesn’t take too much effort IMO.

      1. Tell me more about this spreadsheet. It’s a list of everything you own on one tab. Another tab for what you plan to wear for the week. Anything else?

   8. A week in advance???? Oh lawdie. I’m lucky if I have a complete outfit on my body each day. :-)

      My wardrobe is largely controlled by what’s clean and what color I feel like that day. It’s very scientific I tell you.

      1. Ha I consider myself lucky if I remember to hang up my clothes from the previous day. Is it bad to sort clothes into either the “definitely too dirt to wear again hamper” or the “it could go either way basket (which is also sometime the “clean laundry but to lazy to fold/hang basket”)”?? Wrinkly stuff I do *try* to hang right away, but I’ll admit I go to the gym after work, and often leave my work clothes in my gym bag over night.

   9. So I kind of do this — caveat, sometimes for really busy weeks or where I have specific events where I want to wear something particular & don’t want to accidentally wear it earlier in the week. My strategy is to ID the “special day” outfits first & set those aside (it can vary from “I need to wear a suit to X meeting to I have dinner plans after work & want to wear a dress that day) in a part of my closet that I have reserved for “what I’m wearing right now” clothes (everything else is organized by type of clothing). Then I start pulling base pieces for the rest of the week (skirts, pants, blouses, etc.) and put those in the “right now” section. I also add shoes to this pile. I don’t set out what goes on each day other than the “specfic event” days, but I try to limit my morning debate to this part of the closet. Sort of like a business trip packing approach, but in my own closet.

      1. Thanks!

   10. I don’t plan my outfits for the week. But on Sundays I do my laundry, steam, hang up or fold clothes that I’ve slung over the chair instead of hanging up. Then I organize my closet so that base layers – suits, pants, and dresses are on the right, tops and casual blazers are on the left, and shoes, belts, and jewelry are in hanging organizers in the middle. With that level of organization, I can go to my closet in the morning, pull out clothes, and be dressed in 5 minutes or less. Admittedly, it probably helps that I have more of a “uniform” – suit or sheath+ blazer. But if I’m not organized at the beginning of the week, it’ll take me half an hour to get dressed.

7. Etiquette TJ: One of my managing attorneys works a lot with an attorney at another firm, and I have been introduced to that attorney over a conference call (more than once, ha). I recently found out that I passed the bar exam, and I received a really nice note from that attorney congratulating me and suggesting that we three (me, my manager, and this attorney) have lunch sometime. What is the proper response? I should email and thank her, at least, right? It’s been a week and I’ve not responded yet because I don’t really know what to say about the lunch plans–my manager’s schedule is nuts and I think it was probably just a polite way to end the note. Now I’m worried that I’ve waited too long to acknowledge the correspondence.

   I’m being neurotic, I know, but this whole professional/real lawyer thing feels like new territory! Please help! Thanks in advance.

   1. Two options:

      1. Talk with your managing attorney and tell s/he about the lunch invitation, and see if they are interested in doing this, and when they have availability. Then reply to the other attorney with some possible times.

      2. Email the other attorney, thanking her for her note, say that you’d like to have lunch, and that you’ll check with your managing attorney regarding her/his schedule. Ask if she has availability in the next few weeks. Then do #1 above.

      Don’t worry – it’s not too late to respond.

      1. Very helpful, thank you!

   2. Please email her right away to say thank you. It’s not “too late,” but it’s overdue. Just send an email with a warm thank you and a promise to follow up to schedule lunch.

      1. Email sent. Thanks for the push!

8. Already posted this to an older thread, but I need a little advice…

   A bit of background: I’m a new-ish transactional lawyer at a Big Firm trying to make a name for myself. I recently started dating someone (less than six months). Things are going well, and I care very very deeply about him as a person.

   However, I have always considered myself to be independent, self-motivated person who is able to do things on my own–without the need for social support. Recently, I decided that I need to start attending more community events in order to meet potential clients/contacts. I heard about a charity dinner through the grapevine and RSVPed for myself. No guests.

   I mentioned to the bf last night that I have a charity event to go to. He was immediately put off because 1) it’s “weird” to go to events like these alone when a) I don’t know anyone and b) am NOT single and 2) I didn’t even extend him an invite.

   Ladies, I have ALWAYS been comfortable attending events alone–as it gives me the ability to mingle and meet people without having to entertain a guest and to be locked at the hip with a guest (which I always feel inhibits my ability to network). I love my bf, but sometimes I just want to be able to get in there and network without worrying about whether he is entertained and is having a good time.

   Am I crazy for 1) going to this event alone? and 2) not extending the invite to my significant other?

   1. I’m also a transactional lawyer at a big firm. I have never attended a networking event with my SO – he’s never been invited. Charity/Networking events tend to come to us through the firm though, so maybe that might make a difference from what you are talking about. From when I have attended events, I don’t think I’ve ever seen people there with a +1 unless it was, for example, the honoree at a dinner. I have, however, attended charity events at bars with my SO where it was really about the party not the networking, but I don’t think that is the type of thing you are asking about here.

      Anyway to the point – I don’t see how networking is related to your BF. I would tell him that you were under the impression that these events were not considered date events, and were strictly for business. I’m concerned he was so put off by this but that’s another issue. You shouldn’t need to justify this by saying anything about you being independent. This seems like an issue about networking but you’re turning it into a personality issue and defending your way of life. Try not to make a mountain out of a molehill, but of course, if you feel the need to defend your personality and/or he’s having issues with that, that’s a whole other ballgame.

   2. I don’t think so. Just explain to him that it’s a work related function and you need to focus on meeting clients and he’s just too fun and distracting. I’d say something like, “if I brought you along, I’d just want to hang out with you all night because that would be way more fun, but if I go by myself I am forced to meet strangers, maybe we can meet for a drink after?”

      1. And when you meet for that drink, make sure your side of conversation focuses on the people you’ve met and how they could be useful in your network. And on him.

   3. Ditto the above. How are you supposed to network if you’re babysitting a guest?

      1. What if your BF turns out to be a great wingman/networker? Apologize this time. Next time, explain the situation and ask him if he wants to help you network, or if he’d be OK if you had to split up with him at times during the event. He may realize it’s all work and less fun.

   4. Is he actually upset about not being invited to this event, or just generally feels like you don’t have enough time for him? I’m guessing with your biglaw job your hours may be pretty demanding, and perhaps he is feeling a little neglected. I wouldn’t focus so much on figuring out whether to include him in networking events (though depending on his own job/interests he may actually want to go) just make sure you do plan other stuff for him. But for my $0.02, as a new associate right now your primary focus should be on getting to know the people in your firm, don’t worry about being a rainmaker yet! Yes it’s good to be involved in the community/volunteer in an area you are passionate about, but this is not an official work function.

9. Someone had a wonderful clothing spreadsheet; can’t remember who it was. If it’s you and you don’t mind sharing it via email. To avoid mod my email is la_r3tt3 at yahoo. the 3s are es. Thanks!!

   1. That was me! I don’t keep it on my work computer but I’ll send it your way later this evening.

      1. Thank you!!

      2. Saw earlier description, sounds perfect. Could you send your wardrobe spreadsheet to me too?

10. I had applied for a total stretch job in a super cool location a while ago and have been frankly shocked as they have continued to move me through the process, and are currently checking references along with what I think are 1 or 2 other top candidates. However, I’ve realized that much as I would like to move there, this likely is not the job to do it for. They contacted me today to let me know they’ve been unable to contact one of my references (who is out of the office indeterminately due to a family emergency). Should I take this as the opportunity to dropout gracefully? Or better until they actually extend me something, and find another reference (another boss who is aware of me semi-looking for a new job). I’m afraid at this late date they’re going to think I was just wasting their time regardless.

    1. First, congrats on making it as far into the process as you have!
       To your question, I think if you know it is not for you, it’s better to waste less of their time going forward than to have them keep wasting it on you. So yes, I think bowing out now, gracefully, is the better approach. Can you point to anything that has changed in your current circumstances that makes this not the right time to move to the new location?
       Good luck.

    2. Let them know a different reference or just explain why yours isn’t available. At this point, I’d let them make the offer. You don’t really know how good it is until you see it.

       1. And even if you don’t want to move, you can use the offer to leverage a raise or work from home or something at your current job.

          But I’m curious as to why this isn’t the job to move for. If it’s where you want to live, won’t any decent job (and this one was a “stretch”, so wouldn’t be a step down) be OK to get you there, and then after a year or two when you know the city much better you can look for something else? (I take the same philosophy wrt residence–find a nice rental, but don’t buy until you’ve lived there and know the neighborhoods much better)

    3. I just wanted to suggest really thinking about why you’re having this change of heart and make sure it isn’t because you’re maybe a little bit scared to make the kind of changes you would be making. It’s okay to be a little bit scared, even a lot scared!

       1. Thanks to all for the comments. The super cool location is in the very north of the Great White North so it’s not so much somewhere I want to settle, but rather where I would like to do a short time stint and this is definitely a full time gig. Will ponder some more tonight but am likely to bow out tomorrow.

          1. I lived for a short time in the north of the great white north (Yellowknife in my case…don’t know if this is where you mean) and I will say that almost every person there is transitory in some sense. It is a place where for even career positions, people (especially if you are young) are expected to stay a few years and leave. If you love it and want to go…the north is somewhere you will never forget and never stop thinking about until you go, or go back! Take a chance…it is a wonderful experience.

             1. Northern Canada is awesome – usually younger communities with lots of people there for the initial wonderful opportunities to get experience at an earlier stage of their careers than they might “down south.” I’m not in that category as I moved for a permanent, long-term position without really planning for same, but haven’t regretted it for a minute. I love the vibe of working with younger people at the beginning of their careers, and the energetic lifestyle of a young, smaller city.

                I’d advise not to drop out – at least finish the process and see what turns up! You CAN always say no if you get an offer, and if it’s an isolated spot you probably wouldn’t be the first to do so, but it might turn out to have more appeal than you think. Crazy cold winters actually do have their enjoyable sides – the Northern Lights not the least among them, and summers up north are amazing!

                I think we’d all love to know how it turns out for you one way or the other. Good luck with whatever you decide, though!

11. It is so hot and I need cotton shape wear! Any suggestions?

12. Did anyone see this first question in the NYTimes advice column? http://www.nytimes.com/2013/04/14/fashion/take-the-long-view.html?ref=fashion

    I was so surprised by this guy’s reaction to not getting the promotion, but thought the response was great.

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