Coffee Break: Samuele 85 Boot

93 Comments

1. that is some heel. hardcore. would never.

   1. I know that the queen of Jordan wears them a lot (and like no one else I’ve ever seen). They do make flats (and all are in the $$$ level).

      1. I’ve bought a couple pairs from them. Sizing is inconsistent and at the price point, there are much more reliable options. There is a reason why you see all the royals wearing the many colors of Gianvito Rossi pumps for events.

         1. I have several pairs of GR heels, though not pumps, and they are so beautiful but also painful. I wonder if the pumps would be different . . . hmmm.

   2. I know most of us give up heels at some point (I am getting there at 52), but these strike me as pretty sturdy and not that tall as far as high-heeled shoes go.

2. I’m feeling down about the state of the world (and immigration issues specifically) and I know that a little self-care is called for this week, paired with less doomscrolling. One type of documentary I love is the “behind the scenes” look at how athletes train and get ready for their events on the global stage. With the Winter Olympics coming up, I thought I’d ask in case anyone has any recommendations. It sounds like just the thing to relax with tonight (also fine with YouTube series etc).

   1. I really liked Citizen Athlete, about the US women’s bobsled team leading up to 2022.

   2. Simone Biles Rising is excellent.

   3. I also liked the Simone Biles one and Tour de France Unchained on Netflix. They’re also releasing an ice dance one before the Olympics, but it’s not out yet.

   4. There’s a short doc on Olympics dot com about US-born Canadian pairs skater Deanna Stellato, who has a really inspiring story (I mentioned it last week). And an ice dance doc is coming soon, as another poster said.

   5. I don’t enjoy football much but Hard Knocks is easily one of my favorite shows to watch. Not exactly on point for you, more that I might also like to watch something similar around other sports.

   6. Heated Rivalry? I kid, I kid

      1. It sure has a lot of (frankly amazing) behinds!

   7. Home Game and 7 Days Out, both on Netflix. 7 Days Out is not sports-related but interesting behind the scenes content.

   8. If you’re open to a dance documentary, Ballet 422 is a really good documentary about the premiere of a new ballet.

3. Unlike this morning’s thread on college $, what is it like for kids where the parents are divorced and no one has any money (mom teaches school again after the divorce, dad is a deadbeat who makes good enough $ to prevent any need-based aid at CSS schools but has filed for bankruptcy and wrecked his credit, leaving mom to co-sign any school loans)? My nephew confided that he just refinanced his college loans. He did finish in 4 years and has a good job, but has about 100K in debt (that his mom co-signed for; I guess she will be “off” of his loans after he makes payments for a while).

   I talked to his mom once about the school- debt thing and her thought was that in fields like accounting and engineering, it might be more overall to start/finish at a 4-year school, but transferring could be hard from a CC and might result in a 5th year anyway. It might work for teaching or for a field not leading to a job, like history or poly sci. She thought it was just a given. I am so shell-shocked by prices now even for state U (where my understanding is that even if tuition is low, you are often looking at at least 10-15K for dorms and meal plans, more in the northeast).

   For poorer kids, what is a typical debt load like (and I’m guessing it’s all co-signed by parents except for the 5K federal loans you get in undergrad)?

   1. My kid’s private college meets full financial need. The only loans that are part of the package are federal loans, which are limited to a few thousand dollars per year. The rest of the aid is in the form of grants and/or scholarships that don’t have to be repaid.

      What the formula says middle-class parents can afford is more than what I would call affordable, but genuinely poor kids do get sufficient aid.

      1. 1. How hard is this place to get into? I think if you are a top performer or tick desired institutional priorities, this is a great path to have. But for McEverykid, I’m not so sure. Doubly-so for divorced kids or where one parent won’t cooperate with the CSS form or has assets / retirement funds / etc.

         2. I think for a single custodial mom who doesn’t make a lot of $, any non-CSS school just relying on FAFSA probably offers a good deal, especially if you can get into an in-state state flagship (which is kind of the ticket to everything) or a state school with some endowment funds (say UNC Charlotte). If dad is a spiteful jerk, CSS schools likely aren’t going to pay just because dad won’t.

         1. This is not an elite school. Pretty much any decent student can get in (50% acceptance rate). For the average smart suburban girl like my kid (IB diploma, 4.6 GPA, top of the class, 1500+ SAT) there is tons of merit aid.

            1. OMG 1500 SAT is not average

               “Good” is probably north of 1250. Below that, I think no one submits anymore.

            2. yeah I chuckled at 1500 SAT being average. You do know that the median (50th percentile) SAT is just a hair above 1000, right? I think it’s only about 2% of students who get 1500 or above.

               I do think it’s true that there’s a lot of merit aid available at good but not super selective colleges for top students, which your daughter definitely is. But perfect grades in an IB program and a 98th percentile SAT is not an “average” kid by any stretch of the imagination.

            3. That is an “average smart kid.” The kind who is a dime a dozen and not getting into an Ivy.

            4. It is not “average smart.” Average smart is around 1250-1300 SAT, top 15-20% of kids. Top 2% is obviously very different than top 15-20%.

               And kids like your daughter get into Ivies all the time. Is it a bit of a crapshoot at any particular school, sure, you should never tell a kid to count on Harvard specifically no matter how good their stats are. But I interview for my HYPSM alma mater and we admit tons and tons of normal kids from public high schools with similar stats. That’s most kids, actually.

   2. So I got zero parental help. I got about as high paying a job as possible for my lack of education at the time and I was bringing in 3-4k/month. It sucked a lot I lived in a bug infested apartment and could only pay my tuition cash a few times, I graduated with 30k in student loans which I was able to pay off with my adult job within 2 years. My financial situation would have been much much worse if I wasn’t a hot woman, but I would have also ended up with less trauma if I had just taken on more loans.

      1. Was that recent?

         I took classes this summer at a community college and it was <1000 for a 4-credit lab science class (maybe less than $700), but that assumed that you either had time for the bus or access to a car and were already living locally (either with parents or otherwise). Even FT at community college for 2 years + 2 years at local state U would probably be 50K of out-of-pocket costs (assuming you didn't need to do additional time to finish a major, which I feel is increasingly likely).

         If your starting salary is between 50K (basic jobs) and 100K (finance jobs, like a CPA or banking person), maybe 100K in loans isn't that bad in 2026 dollars?

         1. I was in university 2010-2015, year honours Bachelor double major.

            1. In the US?

            2. Heh, the u in honorus tells me she isn’t.

         2. Hahahahahaha. The monthly payment on $100K of student loans on the standard 10-year plan is $1,161 at 7% interest. That’s catastrophic for a single person earning 50-100K.

         3. You can’t even live on 50K, much less pay student loans.

            1. I’d say for a 50K job, you just can’t have loans and you need both roommates and a PT job on top of that. Teachers need to work a summer job.

            2. As a single 22 year old with no dependents, yes, you can live on 50k, almost anywhere in the US. You likely need roommates; and you’re certainly not buying a brand new car or paying for burrito taxis, but this is totally doable. If you really truly don’t know anyone who lives on 50k, get out of your bubble a little.

            3. 50k net in my mhcol city is ~3300/month after taxes. Room in a shared house with a handful of roommates is ~950/month (after utilities). I can keep my food at around $400/month and eat healthy but frugally (ie. I only buy meat when it’s on sale; limited to cheaper vegetables like bulk carrots; no eating out or convenience food; plan meals around weekly sales). Health insurance is $200/month through work; or $300 on the exchange (unsubsidized; although my state actually offers some subsidies this year to make up for the federal loss); monthly transit pass is $90. Add a $100/month for non-food true necessities (toilet paper and soap; not makeup); $35 for a cheap cell plan.

               That still leaves $1525 after your absolute minimum living expenses. Which is definitely tight but you *could* make a student loan payment if you 100% had to, or, spend some of that on a car; or fill out your emergency fund, or better food, or give yourself a fun money budget; or buy a plane ticket to visit your family once a year. You can’t do all of those things all at once on 50k/year, but you can do some of them, and you can certainly live. It’s not necessarily fun, but I’ve done it, and it’s insane and insulting to talk about it like it’s impossible.

            4. Agree for single 22YO. It will get old when you see friends with vacations, cars, $ for a robust dating life (weekends away, nice dinners, cute outfits). But you have to start somewhere.

            5. It really depends where you live. In my small Midwest city I know plenty of people supporting families of 4-5 on $50k/year and they’re fine. They probably save less for retirement than you or I would be comfortable with, but they own single family homes, drive old but reliable cars and take driving vacations to state/national parks. You pay almost nothing in taxes if you’re supporting multiple people on that salary, and if only one parent works, they have essentially zero childcare expenses.

   3. My husband and I both have advanced degrees but work in public service. We make too much money for need-based financial aid, but given our lower salaries and our own student loans (which were eventually forgiven under the public service loan forgiveness plan but not without lots of money going toward them) we have only recently been able to save for our kids college. We have had conversations with our high-schooler about this and the reality is that unless he gets significant merit scholarships, he will likely have to go to one of the state schools (we have a major university that is great and also smaller schools that are also fine) where tuition is cheap. Then maybe go somewhere else for grad school. Our state is geographically big so even if he went to the other big school that is in the other part of the State, he will be hours away from home if he wants to get away from here lol. It feels somewhat unfair because I wish I could have saved enough that money would not be an obstacle to him choosing a college, but the reality is that it will be.

      1. Yep. Thanks to a bait-and-switch on the part of the university re. tuition and funding, I ended up with significant unplanned grad school loans. We repaid them on the standard 10-year plan and finished a couple of years before our kid went off to college. The monthly payment was equivalent to our mortgage or child care bill. We were therefore unable to save much for our kid’s education, but we earn just a bit too much to qualify for huge amounts of aid from the selective private schools. My kid’s choices were in-state or a private school that offered merit aid.

   4. Again?

      1. Usually it’s Friday afternoon. A day early, this week.

   5. I think there’s two things here: what’s a typical debt load for undergrad/what’s the most financially effective path for undergrad for a middle class kid (and let’s say a smart one, but not “going to get a full ride at Harvard/very selective schools with fantastic endowments”; and separately, what do kids do whose parents can’t/won’t pay the expected family contribution?

      The first just varies so much by school that I’m not sure an average number is that effective. I’d strongly advise anyone in that position to look at the school’s graduation rate – a few years of school, a lot of debt, and no degree is the worst of all worlds. In-state is often a good deal; with a lot of variation by state. 100k in debt doesn’t sound unreasonable to me.

      The second has always been a problem – divorce with 1 parent refusing to help is a common situation but not the only one. It is a bit of an oddity in our social system, where we *kind of* have a social expectation that parents help their kids with undergrad if they’re financially able, but not *really*, and there’s certainly no legal obligation to, or fallback social programs for kids who’s parents aren’t going to. If there’s a genuine financial hardship that’s not reflected in the FAFSA, the kid should reach out to the school’s financial aid dept and talk to them about it (Parent #2 can’t pay expected financial contribution because they just lost their job – they’re much less likely to help when it’s just “Parent 2 doesn’t believe in paying for college”).

      1. No one is getting a full ride at a selective school based on merit. All aid at those schools is need-based.

         1. I agree — everyone at those schools warrants “merit,” so no one gets merit. Maybe 1 person per class, but not generally (like at SEC schools to lure in well-statted kids from OOS). If it’s hard to get into, you get need-based aid, which may be much more generous than at State U.

            Less and moderately competitive private schools can be generous with merit aid.

         2. yeah, that’s actually what I meant – a smart kid but not going to get into Harvard (and therefore receive the accompanying full ride need based scholarship). The merit component is just the “is able to get in” part.

         3. This is correct

         4. Unless it’s sports

   6. I had friends like this in college. Many of my friends had chosen our State U because it gave ample scholarships and would minimize their debt burden. Maybe they had gotten into an expensive, higher-ranked private university but chose State U to graduate with less debt. This section of my friends were more likely to work jobs during the semester and generally during the summer. They may also have been attending classes over the summer to graduate faster. They would be less likely to do something like an unpaid internship because they wouldn’t be able to self-finance.

   7. I graduated less than 10 years ago from a state university in a STEM field. I have no debt because I got a full ride scholarship, maxed out pell grants, and worked full time every summer and part time during the semesters. I was living on about $20k a year in a mid to low cost of living area. You go to events with free food or you cook for yourself, you live in a cheap apartment with roommates (no splurging on a private room), you take the bus and bum rides off people, and the only time you go out to eat is if someone asks you on a date and offers to pay. (Woman in STEM, yes I did go on many a first date just for the food.) If I didn’t have the full ride, I would have started at the local tech school to get into a trade or nursing or something and been maybe 5-10k in debt. My siblings are younger and one did the same as me, another started as a CNA at a hospital and worked out tuition reimbursement and finished her nursing degree last year. It’s not glamorous, but it’s possible.

      1. Getting a pell grant is not realistic for most middle-class families though. The bulk of pell grants go to families making like less thank 30K a year (which they should! I’m not saying students from families in poverty shouldn’t get pell grants! But they not part of most middle-class families consideration in paying for college).

         1. She did say “poorer kids” so I assumed poor. If you’re not getting the pell grants, I would assume that means you could take out the equivalent amount in student loans, so that would be a little over $7k a year for 4 years, giving a grand total of $30k in student loan debt.

            Also, the bulk of pell grants go to families with more than one child so it’s really more like someone with 3 kids making $55K.

   8. This is why I did private for undergrad. Got a MUCH better deal with scholarships and loans than a public school. By the time I went to grad school, I was mid-career so paid all cash. Thank God!

4. Help me decide what GLP option to choose? I’m most concerned about price. Been on a GLP-1 since 9/23 and only lost about 20#, went off and gained weight so coming back. (Still 50# overweight at least.)

   $449 – Eli Lily, 4 vials of 5mL, can stretch to 6 doses but PITA
   $999 – compounded, 200 units in 1 vial, approximately 8-10 doses but previously there was a lot extra so it went further
   $149/mo – the new pill that apparently you have to take 30 minutes before any other meds which would screw up my other schedules

   1. Following. My husband is interested in taking one (he has a BMI of about 32, hypertension, non-alcoholic fatty liver, and high cholesterol) but our insurance stopped covering them unless you have a BMI of 40+ or type 2 diabetes. He would need to gain 60 lbs to get to the BMI threshold. How are others who don’t have insurance coverage even navigating the options?

      1. Out of pocket. Like anything not covered by insurance that you want. OP, if you know what you need, check out the online providers like Ro and Hers, they’re cheaper than what you’re posting here. Also Amazon pharmacy is supposed to be decently priced too.

   2. Is one of these a different drug from the one you were on? I think I’d be inclined to try something new based on results, though wide studies do show smaller losses than we often see touted on social media and such.

   3. What dosage are you planning on starting at? Because Eli Lily (Zepbound) and Wegovy injectables are both cheaper than that for the starting doses – and will probably be less expensive for higher doses by the time you would need them.

   4. I’m using compounded now and have never used the big pharma versions, but when I run out, I think I am going to real tirzepatide. I had a pretty decent response on compounded (same as you) but plateaued and am now up a bit. I drank the kool aid about how compounded may not be the same as the OG, so I’m willing to pay more for the real thing. I do know that compounded is supposed to be biosimilar (or identical?) but there were so many compounders that I don’t fully trust it.

      1. It’s $300/month for the 2.5 mg dose in vial format from Lilly Direct.

   5. Has anyone been on these long enough to have met goals and weaned off? DH probably could benefit short-term from one, but is so warry of this being a lifetime commitment. For something like insulin for a T1 diabetic, I get it. But even with meds for T2 diabetes, you can wean off often with some lifestyle changes. DH is flirting with a D2 reality but isn’t quite there yet. IDK if taking the shots / pills helps him avoid it or will lock him in for the next 40ish years. It’s not helping that I finally saw the Substance, which alludes to what he also hopes — not just health, but being trim and not ashamed of how he looks. I do get why he is concerned. But if lifestyle would have done the trick, he can’t maintain the lifestyle commitment for more than a few days before falling off the wagon and feeling rotten about it.

      1. Is it desirable to wean off? I thought the long term side effects were things like “less cancer” and “less dementia,” similar to how T2 diabetics on metformin can age better than healthier people off metformin, all else being equal.

         He also shouldn’t plan to wean off if he can’t maintain the lifestyle changes off the med. The difficulty with lifestyle is part of what they’re treating.

   6. Sounds like you’re on Zepbound? The pill is cheaper, but also slightly less effective. Since you’re losing at an average of 1.5 lbs a week, I’d stay on the Zep, and maybe increase the dosage.

5. As a Danish woman I am pretty heartbroken about the current affairs of the world. I have family and friends in the US who are horrified about what is going on, so Iknow a lot of Americans are against it too. For us in Denmark it is really hard to understand how the relationship between our countries could erode so quickly. International relationship between nations have something in common with relationship between people. It takes a long time to build trust, but it can be destroyed very quickly

   1. Is there a sense on the ground that an invasion is likely?

      1. Wait. Are we seriously at this point?

         1. It would be extremely costly and stupid to initiate a ground invasion of Greenland.
            Given this administration’s habit of doing costly, stupid things, it’s possible but I hope cooler/smarter heads will prevail.

      2. No I would say that most Danes still trust it will not come to that. But we are angry and disappointed because we have invested a lot in the relationship with the US and we are insulted on behalf of the greenlandic people because the US implies that they could be bought or bribed

         1. Yeah, I’m sorry, it’s despicable. Thank, Trump. It’s all for his ego.

            1. It’s also for the oil and the rare earth minerals the billionaires want to mine.

   2. Denmark has been a friend of the US all my GenX life and it’s super hard for me to understand as an American. One of the things that got me through the pandemic was the very interesting (and honestly very funny) documentary “Through Greenland” with the Coster-Waldaus. I’m not even much on monarchy but yours seems very cool and reasonable (boy meets girl in bar in Australia, girl becomes queen!).

   3. As an American, I am so very sorry. It is absolute insanity to threaten an ally like this. This administration has no concept of history and the institutions and alliances established after WWII. Your reference to relationships is spot on – the damage this administration is inflicting on our global alliances, goodwill, and standing will far outlast this administration.
      No one I know wants this. I don’t even know if the die-hard MAGAs seriously want Greenland to be a United States territory or if they just enjoy the spectacle of bullying.

      1. There was some Router/Ipsos polling on this; acquiring Greenland only has 40% support *among* Republicans (dropping to 10% if you specify via military force). That doesn’t mean they’ll break with Trump if he does it anyway (and a lot of Republicans responded Unsure, rather than Opposed) but it’s not like his base is clamoring for this. It has significantly weaker support than intervening in Venezuela.

   4. I am very sorry. I am a very embarrassed American and terribly ashamed that Tr*mp has visited his egomaniacal psychosis on the world.

   5. You’re absolutely right to be angry and frustrated at the US over this, and I’m deeply concerned about the long term impact on America’s international credibility, even if 2028 goes well

      But for the sake of understanding where it’s coming from, I think 99% of this is about domestic politics, and the actual relationship between the US and Denmark and Greenland is nearly irrelevant. Most Americans supporting this could not find Denmark on a map, let alone tell you anything about the history of US-Danish relations. I don’t think even Trump specifically hates Denmark in any kind of consistent way, he just hates anyone who doesn’t bow to him

6. Appellate lawyers help me understand, please. Can you argue a hypo not in the record?

   1. You can argue anything you want. Whether it is appropriate depends. But generally. appellate review is not just to seek justice for the parties. It is to create precedent that will apply to other factual scenarios. If the rule one side is arguing for would create problematic scenarios in other cases, you can certainly point that out.

      1. I agree. Hypos are often useful to demonstrate the bounds of the rule you are seeking or arguing against. Of course, the Court doesn’t have to consider it in the same way they are bound by the facts established below, but I think they can be a useful tool for argument.

7. A well-meaning relative with hoarder tendencies bought us a lifetime supply of scented hand sanitizer from Bath & Body Works. I think some may also have glitter? Because I’m a child of a child who went through WW2 with ration coupons and a mother who went through the great depression, I need to appeal to you all for a blessing to just let this stuff go. It’s 2026. The stuff has largely gone unused. I have used the sanitizer spray to freshen the closets up when they seem a bit musty. But the gel stuff? Needs to go.

   1. It’s probably expired by now.

   2. If you know any elementary school teachers see if they want it

   3. Post on buy nothing! It will go quickly.

      1. +1

         Someone would love to have it.
         Unfortunately, they may also be a hoarder…

   4. Put it on your local buy nothing FB group and give it to someone who wants it.

   5. See if a daycare or school wants it?

      1. Actually this is a great idea. Our local nonprofits for battered women and homeless teens also takes toiletries like this.

   6. Agree with the suggestions of ways to get rid of it, but absolutely without question get rid of it! You are not a storage facility. You don’t use it, you don’t plan to use it, you don’t want it. Dispose of it.

   7. There’s a consignment shop near me – private, not Plato’s closet or whatever – that loves stuff like this, but only if they’re still sealed. I did a clean out of all of my subscription box skincare stuff a while ago. They’ll give you like $1 per item by it adds up if you have a lot!

   8. Maybe food pantries (they also need non-food hygiene items) or shelters?

   9. It would probably be well received as a donation to schools, preschools, after school programs, shelters, clinics, etc. Let it go with the mindset that you will be offsetting a nonprofit’s cost for an essential item.

   10. You have this stranger’s blessing to let this stuff go.

   11. Why donate it to people who could use it? Clinics, schools, and other organizations would take it in a heartbeat

   12. Yes, please get rid of it (others have given you ways to do that). Holding onto it isn’t virtuous — you have to remind yourself of that given your family’s history relating to stuff.

   13. Just toss it. Keeping stuff you don’t need is how hoarding and disorganization starts. It’s better for your own mental health to just get rid of things and keep your space tidy. You’re not doing major favors by trying to give it away and a lot of things are just junk. This is in that category.

8. I’ve been working with my retired mom for months to get her on a budget, keep her account from over drafting, cutting out scam insurance policies, and get a bit of an emergency fund. During this her house obtained some storm damage, I found out last night by accident that she deposited the 5 figure insurance check into an American Funds investment account last week, an account she “forgot about” and only remembered when she got the statement. She has 6 months left to fix the damage. The check will not cover all the repairs as it is, but I found a contractor who would like put seams on the back of her house to get to a break even, but she told me last week she was “handling it.” I need to talk sense into her right? this is nutso?

   1. Sounds like she needs some help. Is this something you could project manage for her?

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