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Our daily workwear reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices.
Saks always has a great sale around this time of year, and there's one more day of “online preview” before the sale hits the brick & mortar store. There are some crazy deals to be had — lots of Elie Tahari and Boss dresses coming down to $150-$300ish — but for splurge Monday I thought I'd feature this pretty black and red colorblocked dress from St. John. I like that it feels fresh but also really classic — and the waist detail, sleeves, and hidden back zipper are all appreciated. The dress was $1,195, but comes down to $717 in the sale. (It's also available in a navy/gray/purple combo.) Colorblock Knit Sheath Dress
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Sales of note for 9.16.24
- Nordstrom – Summer Sale, save up to 60%
- Ann Taylor – Extra 30% off sale
- Banana Republic Factory – 50% off everything + extra 20% off
- Boden – 15% off new styles
- Eloquii – Extra 50% off sale
- J.Crew – 30% off wear-now styles
- J.Crew Factory – (ends 9/16 PM): 40% off everything + extra 70% off sale with code
- Lo & Sons – Warehouse sale, up to 70% off
- M.M.LaFleur – Save 25% sitewide
- Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
- Talbots – Extra 25% off all tops + markdowns
- Target – Car-seat trade-in event through 9/28 — bring in an old car seat to get a 20% discount on other baby/toddler stuff.
- White House Black Market – 40% off select styles
Some of our latest posts here at Corporette…
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And some of our latest threadjacks here at Corporette (reader questions and commentary) — see more here!
Some of our latest threadjacks include:
- What to say to friends and family who threaten to not vote?
- What boots do you expect to wear this fall and winter?
- What beauty treatments do you do on a regular basis to look polished?
- Can I skip the annual family event my workplace holds, even if I'm a manager?
- What small steps can I take today to get myself a little more “together” and not feel so frazzled all of the time?
- The oldest daughter is America's social safety net — change my mind…
- What have you lost your taste for as you've aged?
- Tell me about your favorite adventure travels…
Anon
When you travel and you carry on, how do you decide which skincare products to bring? I won’t be able to fit everything, so what is the most essential? Where do you prefer to go for travel sizes?
cat socks
Moisturizer with sun screen is one thing I always take. I will decant items into contact lens cases instead of trying to get travel sizes of everything.
Vicky Austin
Omg, the contact lens case hack. I would never have thought of that. Amazing.
Anonymous
I do this too, but with those tiny containers makeup and skincare places give you for samples.
Anonymous
This. I save and refill the sample size containers because I like to know exactly is in each one. With the contact lens case thing I was constantly forgetting which was conditioner and which was face cream.
C2
At some point, I picked up mini sizes of all my most-used skincare products. I keep the jars when they run out and decant from the main product. I usually take a toner, serums and moisturizers with me, and a travel pack of makeup remover wipes. If I’m traveling more than a couple days, I’ll take a gentle cleanser, too. The thing that saves me the most space is editing my makeup bag to just the exact items I need for the trip, and nixing any pallets that I might be using for just one color.
Anon
I have mini sizes of most of my items from Sephora etc and travel with those. I don’t plan to do any several/multistep skincare things while traveling. So in the evening it’s a double cleanse (cold cream + a sample size liquid cleanser) followed by my curology tretinoin/azaleic acid cream. Mornings I have a serum and a vitamin c cream, both sample sizes.
I use the hotel soap, shower gel, shampoo, conditioner, and body lotion.
I travel on a 25%-50% schedule most months, so I have duplicates of all my makeup and the travel size skincare mentioned above packed at all times.
On the last day of my trip, as I’m getting ready, I make a note of anything I’m running short of – a literal note, on the hotel note pad – and then stick that in my clear case for TSA sized liquids. Next time I pack I reference that note for anything that needs refilling/replacing.
EM84
It should be guides by what your skin requires to use on an everyday basis. For me, it is a SLS-free cleansing gel, antioxidant moisturizer, BHA exfoliant liquid. I have all of these in a sample sachet version, which saves lots of space in skincare bag. I have a travel set of shampoo, hair mask and body wash (small 15ml bottles, which I refill regularly). And my makeup bag. All fits well below the TSA limit and I never regretted not bringing my other 67 items from my makeup/skincare counter on every business trip. If I travel somewhere with harsh-for-me UV levels, I would obviously add separate SPF product, but I usually do fine with the SPF in my makeup and spending time in meeting rooms.
Fishie
I buy travel sizes of my faves to bring with. Remember that prescriptions (i.e. retinol or other stuff) do not count toward liquids. I put those in a separate bag. I bring face wash, moisturizer, and Clinique Pep Start tinted spf, sample size mascara. I use a stick foundation so I don’t have to pack that in my little baggie, and I bring makeup removing wipes so those don’t go in there either. I’ll admit, I pack toothpaste and vaseline but don’t put it in my baggie. I’ve never had a problem.
Diana Barry
I like this! Normally don’t care for colorblock but this is great.
Also love the new look! I am on a laptop.
Anonymous
I love the look of the non-black/red dress (too Star Trek for me), but what do you wear with it? My office hovers around 70 degrees (LEED certified building yo), so I need something on my arms.
Anonymous
Wait are you saying 70 degrees is too hot or too cold? Because that is… way warmer than any office building I’ve ever been in. I run warm and I would be uncomfortably hot at 70.
Anonymous
Our offices are kept at around 72 degrees.
Anonymous
Not the Anon poster above, but for me, 70 degrees is too cold for short sleeves if I’m just sitting at my desk. And I think there would be a revolt if it was less than 70 degrees in my cubeland office building. There are multiple space heaters going as it is.
So…I usually wear long sleeves, sweaters (usually in merino wool or cashmere), pants and Smartwool socks.
Anonymous
Holy h3ll — you need to come to my office then. It was maybe 68 inside? Which is too cold if I am just sitting at a desk with cold air blowing on me. I hate it — is is borderline too uncomfortable to work if I don’t break my word stride and go walking around periodically.
74 would be where comfort begins.
And on Friday, I had on pants, boots (worn with wool knee socks), a t-shirt, a wool sweater, and a Lilly Pulitzer Murphee scarf (so wool/cashmere but lightweight). It wasn’t nearly enough. I was freezing.
Housecounsel
I feel like I wore some version of this dress, probably from Casual Corner, in the mid-nineties.
Anonymous
Do you feel you’ve ever gotten subpar medical care or doctors have simply brushed off what you’ve said because you’re a woman or not white or young? Had this discussion with a bunch of guys (white and East and South Asian American) mostly going into healthcare, who were like – nah that doesn’t really happen? Yet that’s not what I’ve heard or read. Personal stories?
I feel like I’ve known older women who were brushed off as – that hysterical woman. But then I’m like these are stories my aunts told like 15-20 years ago, are these guys right and there’s more sensitivity training now?
November
I’m pretty shocked by this question. Of course this happens, all the time, every day. It happened to Serena Williams, who almost died after giving birth. It happened to my relative who walked around for a month with a ruptured, abscessed appendix after doctors brushed her pain off as an ovarian cyst. It has happened to my mom with multiple maladies. Just yesterday our family photographer was telling me that she has been living with severe pain for over a year and only recently was able to find a doctor to take her seriously and get a diagnosis. I personally have had a doctor deny me medication for an endocrine condition and tell me to go on the South Beach Diet instead. And with the exception of Serena Williams, all the people I just mentioned are educated, middle class white women. Imagine what it’s like for the uninsured, poor people, non-white people, people with mental health conditions or addictions, people who speak English as a second language, etc.
cbackson
A good friend’s wife almost died because doctors dismissed her lower abdominal pain after childbirth as just normal aches and pains even though she was in such discomfort that she couldn’t stand. She finally called her sister (an OB on the opposite coast) who immediately recognized her symptoms as a ruptured appendix and sent her to the ER.
anon
Yes, I almost died of a ruptured appendix as well after being ignored by my doctor (who said it was stomach flu). This kind of thing is unfortunately very common.
Anonymous
In my experience, doctors brush off what *every* patient says. It might be worse for women, but doctors in general don’t like to be questioned or challenged, or to have meaningful informed consent discussions. Doctors prefer patients who accept whatever they are told without question or discussion.
Godzilla
There was a hashtag trending this weekend @doctorsared1ckheads or something to that effect. It’s really sad to read what a lot of people have suffered through at the hands of providers.
Anonymous
It is an extremely well known fact that women of color are often not taken as seriously with respect to their medical issues as white women. I’m pretty surprised that individuals who are chosing to enter the medical profession are so ignorant of this.
https://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/racism-discrimination-health-care-providers-patients-2017011611015
Leatty
Yes. When I was in law school, I went to the school clinic with appendicitis first thing in the morning. The doctor told me I probably had an STD (I didn’t), ordered a lot of tests to prove that I had an STD, then sent me home. I was in excruciating pain, so I went to the ER that night. Because I had already been seen by a doctor, triage ignored me for 8 hours. By the time I was seen by a doctor and given a CT scan, the doctors couldn’t tell from the scan whether my appendix had burst so they couldn’t remove my appendix laproscopically. A decade later, I’m still livid about it.
Anonymous
That’s awful! I’m so sorrry.
SomeoneOutThere
Something similar happened to a friend of mine. She had what turned out to be pleurisy and they kept trying to diagnose her with an STD when none of the symptoms were remotely close.
Anonymous
Definitely. I have Graves‘ disease which can be life-threatening if not treated. I developed it within a year after having my first baby so my doctors tried to tell me that my symptoms – sweating, insomnia, sudden weight loss – were just because I was postpartum. Even though these symptoms developed suddenly more than 6 months after having the baby. I finally convinced them to draw blood and they saw my thyroid numbers were all wacky. But it was a battle.
Anonymous
Don’t get me started on childbirth-related health issues. I’m 34 and my mom has never found a doctor to take her seriously about her incontinence. They tell her to just wear a pad. Make sure you’re near a bathroom. A friend broke her tailbone during delivery and it never healed right. The doctors tell her it’s normal, just get a better chair. The attitude is, oh well these are common issues so we’re just not going to treat them. Women’s pain doesn’t matter.
Anonymous
So sorry to hear about your mom.
I highly recommend seeing a physiotherapist who specializes in pelvic floor physiotherapy. It’s been lifechanging for me. I tried someone who did not do an internal exam initially and it was much less effective so highly recommend someone with specific training who does an internal exam to determine exactly which exercises are needed.
Anonymous
Thanks, I’m going to raise this with her again. She’s in a pretty rural area so there aren’t a lot of options near her… and she can’t/won’t take long drives because of the incontinence. I know this issue has gotten more press in the past few years though so maybe the options near her have improved.
Anon
+1. I got hit by a car while crossing the street 3 months postpartum (thank goodness this was my baby’s first week in daycare and she was not with me). I developed excruciating pain when walking but we really didn’t know whether this was accident related or childbirth related. Hats off to my doctors who did not ignore me, but the only person who was actually able to help was the pelvic floor therapist. By the time I was directed to see her, I’d been in severe pain while caring for an infant for almost a year and was on the brink of calling life quits. She literally saved my life. I’m pain free now and thanking my good fortune every day to have been able to find this help.
FWIW, my pain was a pinched nerve that was the result of overcompensation by the pelvic floor to stabilize my pelvis after the accident. I didn’t break anything (except his windshield) likely because I was postpartum and all my ligaments were so loose, but the impact knocked my base out of alignment and it did not heal right.
Walnut
Post partem hemorrhage after being discharged. I was told by the ER staff, my nurse and my doctor (all four were female) that I “probably hadn’t lost that much blood.” Turns out I had lost a significant amount of blood and continued to lose more for the next 12 hours back in the hospital until I literally lost my ish at the nurse and doctor to TRY SOMETHING DIFFERENT.
My mother was with me when I lost my mind and rather than being the strong willed feminist that she usually is was like, “You weren’t very nice to them.” Uh…I’ve already lost more than a quarter of my body’s blood supply and we appear to be working toward half. Why is there not an expectation of a data based discussion on what their current method is, how they are monitoring/measuring, and what their corrective course of action is?
Anonymous
Yes. My sister was sent home twice with appendicitis. Multiple doctors tried to treat my thyroid disease with antidepressants (I had to doctor shop just to get thyroid testing that showed perfectly straightforward Hashimoto’s hypothyroidism). My mom had a serious condition brushed off as “this is what feels like when you’ve had three kids” for more than a year. I understand that many doctors believe in brushing off all patients, assuming the ones who are “actually sick” will persist in seeking help. Unfortunately, they forget that some people become too sick to fight for help, and they overlook how seriously diagnostic delay can affect our lives (and sometimes our ability to fully recover). Sounds like the guys you were talking to are planning on continuing this tradition.
cbackson
I don’t know if this was because I was a woman or if it would have happened to anyone with my medical history. However, in law school I started having very odd symptoms – dizziness, a strong feeling of malaise, severe nausea, intense loss of appetite to the point of food aversion. It came on really quickly and was fairly disabling – standing and walking were hard due to the nausea and dizziness. I didn’t have a doctor so I went to see a new provider. As I always do, I responded honestly to the intake form, including disclosing that I had been treated for anorexia nearly 10 years previously.
Once he’d read the form, the doctor dismissed that any of my symptoms were physical, was positive that this was a psychological issue and in fact, that my anorexia had returned and that I was saying I was sick to hide food restriction. When I told him I’d been recovered for a decade, he literally said, “once an anorexic, always an anorexic.” He literally only took vitals – didn’t even test my balance, ask me about the pattern of the nausea, anything. He sent me home was a therapy referral and a prescription for Prozac. I was shaking with frustration and anger by the end of the visit.
The next day I ended up in the emergency room because I couldn’t see. Turned out I’d been in the prodrome phase of a severe atypical migraine.
Anonymous
I had migraines that turned into chronic daily migraines at age 19. Treated with several different neurologists, who tried me on various types of medications (which have side effects nearly as bad as the migraines themselves). I was eligible for medical Botox, a proven, FDA-approved treatment by age 20. Asked every doctor at every appointment. Did not receive said Botox treatment until age 27 (it works amazing well, BTW). I want those 7 years of my life spent suffering back. No one listened. No one cared.
Anonymous
I’ve heard this story so many times – doctors don’t seem to take migraines seriously. Idk what it is.
Anonymous
Because migraines affect women many times more than they affect men. I’m not kidding. That’s exactly why it’s an understudied, under appreciated medical issue.
Anon
I’ve heard that Botox for chronic migraine can become less effective over time (I’m not sure if the idea is that you get used to it?). I know it’s anecdotal but I’d love to hear how long you have been doing it and getting good results. I thought it was great the first couple of years I was on it for chronic migraine but have seen less help in the more recent years, but there are of course too many factors to really isolate the impact…
November
Another nuance to this is weight. Doctors tend to blow off the concerns of fat people and tell them that every symptom is caused by weight. They also tend to treat fat people so poorly that those people then avoid going to the doctor and seeking treatment for health issues. https://www.healthline.com/health-news/my-doctor-fat-shamed-me#5
please tell me this is a fake question and you aren't this dense
Yes, almost always with every single doctor I have ever had.
I feel like I have to walk a fine line between playing a helpless, clueless patient and knowing when to call the doctor’s lazy BS. I don’t go to the doctor so they can basically read me a WebMD article. I go to the doctor because I know that when my kid got scabies *again* from an infected classmate she is going to share it with the entire household if we don’t ALL get treated at the same time and no, we don’t all have symptoms at the moment because it can take up to two weeks before they appear and that treating 1/3 of the household at a time is a fine way of creating a super-hardy strain of the little b*st*rds that we will then end up passing around between us for the next 8 months while the doctor shrugs and asks how long we have been allergic to our dog (&$#*??!?!!?!).
Anonymous
I’ve always gotten good to very good medical care but I think it’s a combo of:
— getting a dr via a recommendation from someone who raves about them (esp. if everyone raves about them). Found my vvv awesome OB this way (from my junior league fundraising committee’s management roster)
— maybe doctors are scared of lawyers just a teeny tiny bit (so they will either kill us so that no one can tell or make sure that their treatment can survive scrutiny). I’m not a med mal attorney (I’m a tax attorney, so if ever there were a doctor-friendly lawyer it might be me), but it has been so uniformly good that I have to wonder if this isn’t what explains it.
— I 100% know that this would be different if I had to go to an ER and just relied on who was there catching cases that day/time. But I’ve great luck with the doctors I’ve chosen.
TL;DR — pre-vet with people you know
MNF
It’s funny because I just had an experience with an ob that was so incredibly insulting and all I could think was, “you know I’m a lawyer, right?”. I told her that my birth plan was to go unmedicated and she literally said, “But the epidural is for pain management”. I mean, clearly having a JD has nothing to do with my decision, but if I could get through law school, and came in indicating I don’t want an epidural, don’t you think I’m smart enough to realize what the epidural is for?
anonymous
Yes, I lost a parent to doctors who wouldn’t listen despite repeated calls and visits insisting something was not right and shouldn’t be brushed off. You better believe now we are all incredibly insistent and seek second (or third!) opinions because no one will be your health advocate but you.
As for your friends, if they haven’t figured it out yet as they are just starting in healthcare, they will understand soon that while perfection is not possible, most patients who feel they’ve been listened to don’t sue.
Anonymous
I’m so sorry for your loss.
Anonymous
I commented above about my mom but I just realized I have a personal story – I suffered from migraines beginning in my teens. My doctors dismissed it as “hormonal” and prescribed BCP. The BCP didn’t eliminate them. Years later, I mentioned to my dentist that I had a lot of clicking in my jaw. She prescribed a night guard to help. Shortly after I got the night guard, I woke up one morning and couldn’t open my jaw. I went to the dentist right away, and she sent me to a TMJ specialist. Turns out I had a pretty serious TMJ disorder – which also caused my migraines. I got the TMJ issues treated and I’ve never had clicking or migraines again.
Anon
Hi, Would you mind sharing how your TMJ was treated/by what kind of doctor specifically? I would really appreciate it! Struggling with chronic migraine and suspecting TMJ is part of it.
Anonymous
The office was called something like TMJ and sleep therapy center. The doctor I saw had a DDS but he didn’t practice regular dentistry, he specialized in TMJ and sleep disorders. I had a series of injections, some physical therapy, and a low dose of an anxiety medicine. Once my jaw was opened, they fitted me for a night guard too. This was maybe 15 years ago. I haven’t worn the night guard in years.
I’m thankful that I went to my dentist first; if I hadn’t just seen her I probably would’ve gone to the ER, and I would’ve had surgery. I talked to the specialist about surgical options and he recommended less invasive options first.
Anon again
Thank you for the info!! Glad to hear your success story!
Anon
I think it’s WAY too easy and common to dismiss women’s medical concerns as something that is related to otherwise routine, women-specific biological functions (giving birth, breastfeeding, ovaries, etc.). I expect the same is true for being overweight, as someone mentioned above. FWIW, I was just told on Friday that my recurring chest pain is from breastfeeding. I haven’t breast fed for 3+ months. I’m in search of a second opinion.
Anonymous
Not a case of misbelieving me, but a doctor scraped my membranes without my consent at a prenatal appointment. (For those who don’t know, this is a common way of jumpstarting labor that many people willingly consent to. But it’s been linked to a higher risk of infection and it was NOT something I wanted done). My daughter was born healthy and I was fine too (except for the pain during the procedure) but 8 years later I’m still livid about it.
AnonPara
Although I do have a trusted (female) internist, I am afraid that any health concerns I may have could be attributed to being peri-menopausal. There is so much variety in how “symptoms” of being peri-menopausal manifest between women. Other than hot flashes, there doesn’t seem to be much consistency in terms of what could be peri-menopausal related and what’s something else.
Anonymous
Yes this happens all the time. I keep records and report date/time/discussion topics to every doctor that appears so that they know I’m on top of things. Here is an example. This weekend I spent Friday night and Saturday night in the hospital to stay overnight both nights with my Mom. The first doctor ignored my request to talk about Mom’s condition (which he told me he would do when I begged the nurses to call him so I could talk to him). When he eventually arrived a few hours later, it was clear he hadn’t taken any time to learn about Mom’s history, and he dismissed my concerns for my Mom throughout the discussion. The next morning, when two other doctors arrived, I explained plainly that the first doctor wasn’t aware of the facts which I laid out with dates/times/etc. They followed up immediately (phone, email). So there are good doctors out there, and the good ones will help us if we can find them.
Q: Thank you note
Hive: Need some advice. One of our senior leaders is retiring very soon. His sponsorship has positioned me well for the future and I know his support has been critical in some of the opportunities that “appeared” for me. I want to give him a hand written note thanking him for his support during my first job. Thoughts?
nutella
How about what you said here!
Jerry, Congratulations on your retirement — a well-earned rest after 35 years of dedication to this company! I personally wanted to thank you for being so critical in so many opportunities in advocating for me. Your mentorship and sponsorship has positioned me well for the future and I am very grateful for your support. Please be sure to keep in touch! While we will miss your pep talks before our big meetings, I’m glad you will finally have time to spend fly-fishing with Gayle in Michigan. All the best wishes and many thanks, Leslie (include contact info, if comfortable)
Leatty
I just bought a pair of Blondo booties (link to follow), but I’m not sure how to style them beyond wearing them with jeans. Ideas?
Leatty
Here’s the link to the booties. I bought them in gray suede: https://m.zappos.com/p/blondo-valli-waterproof-bootie-dark-grey-suede/product/9047667/color/17947?ef_id=V0gq7wAABDBBzjI@:20181105141810:s&utm_medium=pla_g&utm_campaign=170853331&utm_term=pla-407509559441&utm_source=google
Love these boots!
Great choice! I have these exact same boots and I love them!! Wear them with leggings often, ponte pants and jeans, look nice dressed up with a jacket or more casual with a sweater – extremely comfortable and versatile and thinking about getting them in more colors!!
Anon
Ponte pants, moto leggings, leather leggings, skinny cords in a complementary color, with tights and a dress if your office is more casual. I tend to tuck in leggings and cuff skinny jeans/pants at the top of the boot, but play around with that to see what looks the best on you.
pugsnbourbon
I have boots very similar to these and I wear them with almost anything! Skinny pants, ankle pants, bootcut trousers, tights and skirt/dress. These look cute and versatile to me.
Anonymous
NIce redesign!
I’d prefer a font for comments that was a little more efficient on space (these threads can get incredibly long — with this big font and airy spacing, scrolling through even one multi-paragraph comment will take a while. I prefer to glance and skim). A bit less leading, a bit smaller.
Anonymous
Agree on the font for sure. Much too large. Also makes it hard to follow the thread as not clear where comments are nesting.
Anonymous
Yes. It’s really very difficult to read on my phone.
Cat
+1
Anonymous
LOVE the redesign too!
I think this font is great for posts, but agree that it’s a bit too airy for the comments.
Anonymous
Noooo!!! I love the white space, especially between the lines. There could be less space between the actual comments and the headers and footers, though.
Baconpancakes
Agree. Overall I love the new design, but the font choice is very lazy. There are tons of better fonts out there with great kerning and plenty of white space but that take up less overall space.
Anonymous
This is a bit rude.
Anonymous
I like the font and I like the spacing BETWEEN comments but there’s too much space WITHIN each comment – I feel like the space above and below the actual text of the comment should be smaller. It’s hard to tell where one comment ends and the next begins.
anonshmanon
Another small thing: I collapse all threads up top and then expand the ones I want to read. Right now, I have to press the expand button twice, but that can probably be changed…?
Anon
Same. And on the moms site, there is no option to expand individual comments once you globally collapse them.
Anon
Shopping help! I’m helping my cousin buy a wedding dress and need some ideas of where to look (after a weekend at David’s Bridal). She determined that she wants a subtle A-line with a defined waist, no train, and would prefer the same type of pattern on the whole dress (ie, no lace on top and plain fabric on bottom). She also specifically liked satin. Budget is $500. If anyone has time for some vicarious shopping fun, would so appreciate it!
SomeoneOutThere
If she didn’t like anything at David’s, I would try looking for white bridesmaids dresses. Something like this would make a nice wedding dress: https://shop.nordstrom.com/s/dessy-collection-off-the-shoulder-crepe-gown/4629477 . You could also check a bridal consignment, but I would call about the price point prior to going.S
Anon
The Lucy dress at bhldn. $280.
Torin
+1 BHLDN
I bought my wedding dress there from the “bridesmaid” section and was very happy with the quality.
JS
BHLDN has a great selection. Asos stock rotates quickly, but they have some pretty ones under budget (trains can be removed in alterations). H&M also has a wedding dress line now.
https://us.asos.com/asos-edition/asos-edition-satin-paneled-wedding-dress-with-fishtail/prd/10436707?
Beth
If you have the time to look, also try looking for used wedding dresses at that price point! Both my sister and I were able to get the exact dress we wanted (down to the style number) already altered to a size that fit. We used preownedweddingdresses dot com and had great experiences.
J Crew larger sizes
Has anyone tried them and can you give an idea as to how they fit? Specifically the sheath dresses – there are some really cute, tailored pieces but I have no idea how they might fit. I am a pretty standard hourglass, size 18W and I have never worn JCrew.
Anonymous
IME in larger sizes J Crew tends to fit a bit small. I know everyone says vanity sizing is a big thing in mall stores these days, and that may be true for smaller sizes, but not so much for larger sizes. I’m a 16 and usually need an 18.
Anonymous
+1 from a size 12 on vanity sizing. I mean, I wouldn’t be surprised if the size 12 has grown with me through the years (same size number I wore in HS), but I haven’t been downgraded into a 10 or 8.
Vote Oregon!
Don’t forget to vote! In Oregon, it’s probably too late to put your ballot in the mail, so drop it at an official drop box instead. Mine is in my purse!
Also, if anyone wants to discuss the governor race, I’m so here for that. I can’t believe I (a raving liberal) voted for Buehler, but I also don’t really believe he’ll win.
Anonymous
Why are you doing this? I’m an east coaster and not that familiar with the race, sounds interesting!
I’m having a hard time stomaching voting for S. Menendez in NJ and might write in Katie Brennan.
Anonymous
Mainly, I’m pissed she gutted the mental heath system by closing down hospitals, changing the way mental health/criminal law interacts, which I think is an overlooked part of the very politicized homelessness problem. And 2 years ago she couldn’t pass a budget, so she kicked it to a ballot initiative, asking voters to decide–in my mind, it’s fundamentally the governer’s duty to be better informed about the nuance of the state budget than the average citizen, and she just plain didn’t do her job.
I disagree with Buehler on some things, but he passes my litmus tests–BC and abortions, general climate change position if not the specifics, and the best were going to get on gun control in a purple western state. If he is who he says he is (big if…but that’s always true of someone with a short voting record) I think I could live with him.
Anonattorney
Disability Rights Oregon supported closing down the hospitals, because they were being used to segregate people with mental disabilities. Look for any statements made by Bob Joondeph on this issue.
Also, Buehler is an anti-vaxxer.
Oregon is not a purple state. It’s blue. Not sure why you think gun control will only be accomplished by a republican governor in a state that has a democratic majority in every part of the government.
Anon
Are you sure ballots don’t need to just be postmarked by tomorrow? That’s how it is, like, literally everywhere else.
Anonymous
This is not true at least for Pennsylvania absentee ballots.
Anon
I don’t think this is true any where. The ballots have to be received by election day
Aunt Jamesina
In Illinois, they just have to be postmarked by election day.
Anon
This doesn’t make sense to me. Aren’t most elections certified within a matter of days of the election, before they would even receive a ballot postmarked on election day? Do they just not count absentee ballots received after election day unless it goes in to a recount?
Chicagoan
I don’t think they’re counted unless an election is close enough for them to matter (in Illinois). That is, if you have 10k absentee ballots and the margin on the race for, say, governor is 50k, you know absentee votes can’t change the result.
Natalie
California—ballots have to be postmarked by Election Day. If the results are close enough for them to make a difference it can take days for the official results.
Gail the Goldfish
Oregon votes by mail–it’s not just absentee like elsewhere. Per the oregon secretary of state website, ballots must be received by 8 pm on election day.
Anonymous
In Oregon must be received!!! It’s too late to mail them but there are drop boxes all over the place. I dropped mine at my local library last week . Also, hi to all you other Oregonians here!
anonshmanon
Just wanna say that I am so excited for Oregon to make voter registration opt out instead of opt in!
Caitlin
This Oregon voter can’t believe anyone who considers herself pro-BC, pro-choice, and pro-gun control would vote for someone like Knute Beuhler. He may be better than some other Republicans, but I don’t buy his act, pretending to be a “liberal” Republican. He’s supporting Measure 105, for Pete’s sake (for non-Oregonians, that measure will repeal our sanctuary law, and it’s just a shameful, racist ballot measure). He also thought it was just great when Trump pardoned the Hammonds. Of course, you’ve already voted, so I guess this comment is just for any other Oregonians considering voting for Knute.
One of the best things about living in Oregon is that we’ve had leaders like Kate Brown and AG Ellen Rosenblum who are willing to stand up to this awful administration–suing them when necessary, and refusing to back down as they try to turn the country into their racist, misogynist paradise. In an ideal world, an election for governor wouldn’t be influenced by national politics, but we sure are far from ideal.
Kate Brown has a lot of accomplishments as SoS and Gov, including:
– raising the minimum wage significantly
– automatic voter registration
– improved access to early childhood education and all-day kindergarten
– banning gay conversion therapy
– reducing racial profiling by police
– passing Oregon’s Clean Fuels law
I and my big gay family will sleep better at night if Kate is in charge.
Also, Oregonians: ballots must be RECEIVED by Tuesday evening–it is too late to mail your ballot!
Dinner Party Ideas
Hi. Looking for recipe suggestions. I’m hosting a dinner party for six people. No known allergies and no one is a picky eater. Potluck style but I’m responsible for the main dish and maybe an app or two. Can tell the other two couples what to bring. I have a 6 month old and won’t have too much time that day to prepare. Will need to put him to bed right before the guests arrive so need the meal to be cooking with minimal supervision while I do the bed time routine. I have a slow cooker, instant pot, and multiple sizes of dutch ovens (le creuset in case it matters for any specific recipes). Any recipe ideas that won’t take too long and won’t require too many ingredients? Maybe I can make an app or two the night before and focus on the main dish that day? I have chicken breasts in the freezer and a stocked pantry. Can send the husband for groceries also but would prefer to use the lbs of Costco chicken breasts we already have. Thanks!
Anonymous
How formal? Is this something you could do chicken chili for and put it in the crockpot that morning?
OP
Not formal. Very close friends. We usually go out but are trying to rotate having dinner parties now that we have a kid. The other two couples do not. Unfortunately my husband doesn’t like chili.
Anonymous
Slow cooker santa fe chicken – https://www.skinnytaste.com/crock-pot-santa-fe-chicken-425-pts/
Guacamole and chips for an app.
Anonymous
https://www.skinnytaste.com/crock-pot-santa-fe-chicken-425-pts/
Anonymous
For only 6 people I’d do whatever you normally cook and just scale it up. Simple baked chicken breasts would work. Marinade for a few hours in olive oil, garlic, whatever herbs you have on hand (maybe rosemary and oregano?), salt and pepper, and then toss it in the oven before guests arrive.
For an app, do a cheese board – one hard cheese (gouda?), one bleu, one soft (brie?), served with crackers. If you really want to get fancy put out some jam with it.
Baconpancakes
If there’s a Wegmans near you, they have premade cheese plates, complete with nuts and jams.
Torin
+1
Very easy, and also very versatile in terms of the sides others will be bringing to go with it.
Anon
An oldie but a goodie – chicken Marbella – serve with crusty bread for the juices. Everyone loves this. It’s classic for a reason!
https://www.simplyrecipes.com/recipes/chicken_marbella/
Anonymous
Search Chicken Marbella (you make it the night before after baby is in bed). Pop in in the oven shortly before guests arrive. I usually do it with mashed potatoes and a green veg. Get friends to bring a veg / salad / dessert. For appies just do a cheese plate.
Anonymous
crispy chicken carnitas tacos https://www.countryliving.com/food-drinks/g5066/instant-pot-chicken-recipes/?slide=3
And taco fixings, tortillas, avocado, lime, cilantro, queso fresco, bagged coleslaw mix for crunch.
Have someone bring chips salsa, and guac.
Have another bring wine and beans and rice or a roasted veggie side dish like roasted brussels and potatoes with mexican ish spices on them.
or pulled chicken sliders https://www.countryliving.com/food-drinks/g5066/instant-pot-chicken-recipes/?slide=5
have someone bring sides, mac and cheese, roasted sweet potatoes, a big green salad would all be great.
For appetizers do something simple and easy hit up trader joes and buy some flatbreads or something.
nutella
Ina’s parmesan crusted chicken with arugula salad (with lemon and parmesan shavings). Very few ingredients, does not take long, very easy to follow (foolproof like all of her recipes), and a total crowd-pleaser. She says she makes it for new guests when she doesn’t know what else and now so do I — after all, if it’s good enough for her, it’s good enough for me! Your husband can follow the recipe easily for when you tap out or you can probably bread the chicken beforehand if need be and put them in the fridge in a casserole dish with wax paper in between if you need to really prep them beforehand. Or he can make the salad while you do the chicken. Ask friends to bring the rest like bread, cheese, chips/guacamole, wine, dessert, etc.
Idea
Indian-spiced salmon. I used recipe from the scramble dot com
But fish will cook quickly (wait till everybody or most people are there, pop it into oven, wait 15 minutes. Done.
Anonymous
I am feeling like a total idiot and anxious this morning, and hoping that sharing with the internet will make me feel better. I was going through my phone contacts and realized I had 2 phone numbers listed for Person A. However, one of the two numbers was actually Person B’s number! I am burying my head in the sand about whether this means all the text messages I sent to Person A were also sent to Person B…and, if so, having that icky sense that I shared personal information with someone I wasn’t intending to tell. Nothing I said to Person A probably couldn’t or shouldn’t be read by Person B but it still feels like a huge personal violation (of my own accidental creation). I’m also a little annoyed that, if this was happening, that Person B never said anything about it. Ugh. What an awful way to start the week.
Cat
Having 2 phone numbers listed for 1 person doesn’t mean that any contact goes to BOTH numbers. Otherwise you’d be texting people’s work AND personal phones constantly right? The fact that Person A and not Person B is responding means you were only using the correct number…
Anonymous
They were both mobile numbers. When they ended up on my iMessages in my computer, a message I had sent to Person A was listed under Person B? I am VERY much hoping you’re right!
Anonymous
Depending on your phone, I really doubt that’s what happened. If you were sending to multiple numbers, it would have turned it into a group message. Look at your conversation with A. Check the number it was sent to. As long as that number matches A’s actual number, you were only talking to A. Phones don’t secretly send messages to another number listed for the same contact.
AnonZ
+1
If your phone was sending messages to two different phone numbers, it would show as a group message even if those numbers are saved under the same contact. Unless your text message chain has Person A listed twice (maybe as Person A (M) and Person A (W) or something like that), the messages were only going to the first number listed for Person A.
Anonymous
Probably not – most of the time the first number is set as default, it would have only been sent to one of the numbers so if Person A has responded to you, then you’re good!
Anonymous
Yes! You are all correct – the first number was the primary/default number and it was not turned into a group message. Thanks for taking the time to reassure me this morning. You have made my (Mon)day!
Mortgage vs. investments
Where do you stand on the question of whether it’s better to put money into investments or pay off a mortgage early? We currently put all our extra savings into after-tax investments for retirement, but we’re sitting on another 20 years of mortgage payments too. It’s at a low just over 4% interest rate, but I still sometimes wonder if we should be trying to pay it off a bit early…like throw enough in there to make it a 15 year mortgage.
Veronica Mars
There is no “right” or “wrong” answer here, it depends on your risk tolerance, your horizon for investments, and your attitude towards debt. Personally, I’d look into whether or not you’re exhausting all of your tax-advantaged accounts first. Are you contributing the full limit on your 401k or 403b? Do you qualify for a Roth (now 6k limit)? Have you contributed to your Healthcare Spending Accounts? Do you have children and would like to start an Education IRA/ESA/529? OK, so assuming you’ve exhausted all of your tax advantaged accounts, I would personally pay down the mortgage before doing more investments. I prioritize paying off debt over investing beyond that. For me, having fewer payments per month is worth it, because it means I can use my income for how I want to, and not be locked into a particular spend item.
Anon
4% isn’t that low. Def pay it off faster.
Anon
I personally think you are taking the right approach. Year over year, considered on a 20 year timeline, you are likely getting more than 4% in returns on your investments. In other words, you are earning more than you are paying in interest on your mortgage. In addition, the mortgage interest is likely being deducted on your taxes, assuming that you itemize.
Although some people like the mental benefit of having no mortgage, I personally find it better to know that I have a large amount of money I could use if the unexpected happens and to not have the majority of my money tied up in an asset that is hard to liquidize.
anon a mouse
Itemizing may no longer be a consideration with the new higher standard deduction, though.
Kat – the new comment reply box & other fields are way too big – I can’t see the actual comment I’m replying to plus the comment box/name/email all on one screen (on Chrome).
Walnut
Back in the day when I had a really low overall mortgage balance, I was pretty motivated to pay it off earlier. Now that my mortgage balances are $$$, my focus is 1. Max out 401k, 2. Emergency fund with 6 months of expenses, 3. Target dollar amount to taxable investment account that is mutually agreed upon each year, 4. (fully disclosure…we never get to 4) extra payments to the mortgage.
My theory is that I could always throw the balance of my taxable investment account at my mortgage balance if I get a wild hair. Aside from that, that investment balance gave my family the freedom to roll the dice on a big life change this past year. I wouldn’t have pulled the trigger if all that cash had been tied up in house equity.
Torin
+1 this is my strategy. I too did not get to 4 this year. We missed the target for #3, but not by that much, so I’m not stressed about it. (That’s a lie. I am stressed about it. I’m just trying to talk myself _out_ of being stressed about it.)
Walnut
I’m trying to remind myself that nitpicking nickel and dime transactions for the remainder of the year is not going to magically help us hit #3 this year. What it will do is make my husband crazy.
Pesh
Which Restoration Hardware bath towels do people on here swear by? They have more varieties than I remember! Do they ever go on sale (black Friday, etc.)?
Pearls
Hive – I have been vegetarian for 10+ years and I am finding myself slowly transitioning into vegan. I just realized pearls are not vegan. For those of you who are, did you dispose of your pearl jewelry? Did you replace with something else? I wear pearl earrings almost every day.
Anonymous
At least give it away instead of disposing it!
Gail the Goldfish
Yes, I’ll be happy to take those off your hands.
Also, could you replace with synthetic pearls?
pugsnbourbon
+1 to giving them away. Do you have any younger relatives that might like them?
I mean you could dissolve them in wine a la Cleopatra but I think that’s definitely not vegan.
Replacements – solid silver or gold ball studs, cz studs, or ethically-sourced gemstone studs (like Herkimer diamonds or Montana sapphires).
Pearls
Bad word choice, by dispose I meant rid myself of them. I’m having trouble parting with them, for sentimental reasons and just because I wear them every day. I guess what I’m wondering is, did vegans give away all their pearl jewelry or just stop buying it?
Anonymous
Maybe I am a bad vegan, but I kept my real black pearl earrings that I received as a gift many years before I became a vegan. I, of course, understand the argument for donating them, but I never admitted to being a perfect vegan. I did the same with leather, if I had leather purses or leather shoes that I really liked, I kept them and will use them until they wear out. I think used shoes are gross, so I wasn’t about to donate them. I did give away some of my leather goods, but kept some of it.
I do not buy any new leather, pearls, etc. of course.
Anonymous
I’m not a vegan so maybe my perspective is a little skewed, but ime people do veganism lots of different ways. I think most people try their best and have some grace with themselves (and others). I don’t think reasonable people are going to tell you that you can’t call yourself vegan if you still wear your pearls.
Veronica Mars
I’d donate them to one of those “Dress for Success” charities or events in your area. Having some high-quality jewelry that’s professional would be a blessing for someone else.
Anon
I’m kind of confused what being a vegan eater has to do with pearls you already own. I think transitioning away from using and wearing all animal products for ethical questions is your real question.
And tbh, if you like the pearls you wear and have owned them for a very long time, I don’t see a reason to stop wearing them. They clam that made them has already been harvested, you’d only be depriving yourself of a look you like. It makes more sense to just stop buying animal produced products going forward.
If you insist on getting rid of them, donate them to Dress for Success or sell them to a pawn or consignment shop – encouraging reuse instead of buying new fits better into a “discourage use of animal products” lifestyle.
Anon
This is a very personal decision. You certainly don’t have to give away your pearl jewelry if you don’t want to. What are your reasons for going vegan?
Ellen
I do NOT understand this. VEGETARIAN OR VEGAN, what does it matter. You are NOT eateing the pearl jewelery, are you? If not, continue to wear them but do NOT put the pearls in your mouth if you are concerned. I think we all get to wrapped up in details like this. Enjoy the pearls. The oyster did not work hard to make a pearl, it just wound up with sand in its mouth, and that is how the pearl got there. I wish someone would give me a pearl necklace. I would promise NOT to put it in my mouth if he was a vegan. YAY!!!!
anonshmanon
It’s really your decision and reminds me of the options around inherited fur coats. If you decide to pass them on, and you like the look, you could go for fake pearls. They are what I go as a teen, neither I nor anyone in my personal and professional life spot the difference (or they just don’t care). I quite like the look, so I empathize that not wearing any would really change your look.
Anonymous
I’m pretty much vegan, but I still wear leather and wool that I already owned and sometimes buy it secondhand, just not new. I don’t worry about pearls, still love them and wear them.
Also, go you! Being vegan is great :)
Jules
Some vegans – my son included – eat oysters, on the theory that they do not have a central nervous system and are not sentient. (Naturally, there is some dispute in the vegan world about this.) Oysters are also a very sustainable food source.
I would keep the pearls..
Baconpancakes
Anyone run a sole proprietorship as their primary business and have expenses that are kind of business, kind of personal? How do you budget for those? (e.g. travel to meet clients that is also where your family lives, so you extend the trip and take your SO with you; equipment that is used for the business 50% of the time, and used for personal 50% of the time)
And how do you handle a family budget in this case?
Anon
I think this is truly a tax question, given (my assumption) that you deduct business expenses from your taxes. I would discuss with your accountant
Anon
I don’t know what I’m looking for.. advice, to vent or maybe a combination of the two.
I started my current job about 9 months ago after about 6 months at home while we moved halfway across the world and I set up all our life admin. The place where i work at is a young startup in a fast-changing industry and from almost day 1, I had a full workload. This in itself is perfectly normal and acceptable in young startups and quite frankly, was wonderful after either struggling to communicate in a language I don’t speak, or dealing with the terrible twos.
In the time I’ve been here, my role has expanded, and not in the normal “onboarding and ramping up” sense but more in the sense of significantly more technical, and upstream things being added to my mandate (example, if i hired was a crockery designer, I am now expected to support ceramic engineering and material science teams). This aside, 2 of my teammates supporting other teams have been let go, their work has been on hold (and is not part of my expanded mandate). I have spoken with my manager about the unsustainability of this situation (crockery design itself has legal, business and technical considerations that are fairly complex, and thus the role was created) and every conversation somehow has led to a new team being added to my portfolio.
At this point, i’m not longer just doing my job at a higher level, but a totally different job.
All this in a highly dysfunctional workplace where people scream and fight and sometimes call each other names (not enough women at work, so the guys know to behave nicely with me) is driving me crazy.
This, with additional drama at DH’s workplace, means I am just about done with everything but cannot quit yet (November is a bad time to job-hunt, and I’m not yet at an year)
Anon
If you want to wait a year before leaving, I recommend you at least negotiate for a salary increase now. You’ve taken on a lot of extra responsibilities so you have an excellent case for an increase, and it may make you less resentful in the meantime.
Then you’d be starting from a higher salary base when job hunting.
And as far as handling items you don’t have the credentials for, if you think anything is illegal for you to do as a “lay” person, refuse to do them. Your company can always bring in whatever specialty as a consultant. Do not do anything illegal or unethical just because your boss wants you to do it.
Turkey hotline, please
Thanksgiving hostesses with the most-est …
I’ve been hosting Turkey Day for 15+ people for several years now, so you’d think I’d have this down — but I am not having great luck timing the turkey correctly. We started cooking ours in an Oster roaster oven to save the actual oven for the side dishes. Well, several times, it’s gotten done way too early. Although it was perfectly done initially, carving it and trying to keep it warm for another hour or two has caused it to dry out. Also, turkeys that feed 15-20 people are huge. It’s taking me literally a week to thaw out the bird — and even then, last year I discovered ice in the cavity of the bird when I was stuffing it.
There’s gotta be a better way that results in less stress. I’ve considered roasting the bird the day before — in my actual oven — and reheating before the meal. Could I reheat in a crockpot, with a splash of broth to keep it from drying out?
My family is more about the sides than the bird, but I still want it to be good! I think my first step is to get a smaller bird that cooks more evenly.
Housecounsel
A few years ago I decided to stop stressing myself out with this, and I order my turkey pre-roasted, and then warm it in the oven. I still make sides. I use a local caterer, but Whole Foods provides this service, too. I enjoy the holiday so much more, now!
Veronica Mars
This is tough. Have you considered getting a smaller bird and doing another meat dish, like a ham or roast? Another option would be to consider a cooking method that is more serving friendly. If you’re willing to break down your turkey and serve as pieces instead of a whole bird, you could consider sous-vide-ing a smaller bird in a dutch oven. I’ll put the link for how to do that in the reply. The anova sous-vide is $90-$120 but may be well worth it if you’re interested in expanding.
Veronica Mars
As promised: https://www.chefsteps.com/activities/a-better-way-to-turkey-cook-that-bird-sous-vide-for-the-best-feast-ever
Anonymous
1) Try an air fryer. We love ours and the turkey turns out so good! https://www.amazon.com/Char-Broil-Oil-less-Liquid-Propane-Turkey/dp/B071VT9RRR
2) Try buying a fresh (aka, refrigerated), not frozen, turkey. I’m in the D.C. suburbs and I know Safeway here sells them.
3) Don’t stuff the bird. Make dressing in a separate pan.
Anon
I think the answer is to stop trying to roast a giant turkey.
tesyaa
I agree. I have used turkey parts (breast, lots of extra drumsticks and wings) and it’s so much easier and delicious. You don’t get that presentation though
Turkey hotline, please
Yeah, I think you’re right. I really don’t care about the presentation, nor does my family, so why am I torturing myself with a giant bird?
SC
My BIL is in charge of the turkey, and it always turns out great. He buys 2 smaller birds rather than 1 large one. He buys fresh turkeys. And he butterflies them for more even and quicker cooking.
We have a separate Thanksgiving at MIL’s house on Friday (DH’s parents are divorced). She buys the turkey pre-cooked from a local grocery store and warms it. It’s also really good.
aBr
We switched to deep frying the turkey. Once you get over the initial “OMG so dangerous” reaction, and realize that if the oil is at a safe level and the bird is completely thawed and dry, the only process is rather uneventful. The other upside is that the guys (or it doesn’t have to be gender normative) can we tasked with cooking the birds in the backyard and it divides up the work.
Mrs. Jones
Our family deep-fried a turkey for the first time a couple of years ago, and I’m never going back. It’s so delicious. And you can do it ahead of time if needed.
Anonymous
Deep fry 2 turkeys! Done quickly, and I actually find that the big turkeys don’t have as much meat as smaller turkeys.
Lilly
Do you have access to a grill? If so, buy a medium sized bird, spatchc0ck it, and grill it. Gets it out of the kitchen and is much quicker cooking time. Bonus points for handing your partner a cold drink and sending them out to tend it. Add another meat: ham or if you have a lot of white meat eaters, a turkey breast done the day before, or purchased cooked.
MKB
We do Mark Bittman’s braised turkey instead – if your family is ok without a traditional roasted whole turkey, this is definitely the way to go. It’s delicious, and easy to time and keep everything moist.
Anonymous
Cook two turkeys. One gets cooked in advance; the other gets cooked on the day of. Gives you maximum presentation and enough delicious food.
Belle Boyd
I would consider doing two smaller turkeys the day before — they’ll thaw quicker (you will still likely need the week to be sure they are completely thawed. Thaw them in a stock pot of water in your fridge, change the water daily or every other day. Yes, I know this takes a ton of fridge room, so this works best if you have a second fridge. Don’t have one? Go with fresh turkeys, or a larger turkey and a turkey breast.)
You can roast the turkey the day before. I’d make the dressing separate, just throw some celery and onion in the cavity to flavor the bird. I do this and it works VERY well. You can carve the turkey and reheat it Thanksgiving day in a roaster pan with some broth or water to keep it moist. Just make sure to keep the pan well-covered and not to let the broth cook completely dry.
The more I think about this, the more I think I may do my turkey the day before. Beats the heck out of getting up at 5-6 AM to put the bird in the oven to have it ready for T’giving dinner at noon!
Hollis
How do you apply a creamy eyeshadow stick? I normally put eyeliner first, then swipe on each side and then smear the shadow with a finger, but when I do that, I accidentally smear off the eyeliner. Is there a better way to do this?
Anonymous
Shadow first, then liner. But you might need a creamy liner or liquid/gel (instead of pencil).
AnonInfinity
I just recently got a make up lesson as a gift, and the cosmetologist taught me to use only brushes for blending and never my fingers. She also showed me how to use creamy eyeshadow! I do my eyeliner first and then swipe on some of the eyeshadow stick and then use a brush to blend it, focusing a lot on blending it up my eyelid. The eyeliner and eyeshadow slightly blend together near my lashes, but this preserves the liner quite well.
anon
I’m designing my own holiday cards this year with illustrations I’ve been working on. I want to put something small on the back center of the cards, but I can’t decide what to do. Should I write “cards by anon?” Put my name and a copyright symbol and the year? My initials? None of the above?
Anonymous
I’ve done this before and have a little monogram I use, with the year.
Anon
I like the idea of your initials. Or maybe something like, “Made with love by Anon” ?
Credit Card/Points Strategy
Do you have a credit card / points strategy? If so, how do you structure your purchasing to maximize the value of your dollar? I’m trying to improve in this area, and would love to hear your tips or tricks!
For myself and my husband, we currently do the follow:
– Both have Chase Sapphire Reserve (pay two $450 annual fees, but get benefits of airport lounge access, money back for travel, 3 points on travel and dining purchases – a lot of our spend, no foreign fees, and extra value of points we spend on travel through the Chase portal)
– Prioritize booking on Delta (including for husband’s work travel) to get status and to maximize usable points
– Use Ebates for online purchasing
– Just recently, started prioritizing SPG/Marriott hotels (esp. for husband’s work travel) to build points, which we had regrettably not previously been strategic about
– Target credit card to get 5% off on all Target spend
– Majority of cash in Ally Savings account to get industry high interest (or close)
A few places I think we could do better, where we haven’t yet:
– Get a credit card for gas and grocery, since that’s another high area for our spend; challenge has been finding a card that maximizes both, as I don’t want too many cards
– Potentially get Amazon credit card to get savings on those purchases
– Open checking account that allows us to avoid foreign transaction fees
Ally input needed....
I am debating moving cash from credit union to Ally – can someone please provide a critical review? I hear that experience with Ally customer service is generally positive…are there any challenges, risks, tradeoffs I should be aware of? How easy is it to move $$ back and forth from credit union online account? Thanks in advance for your input…..
Torin
The inability to deposit cash is sometimes a problem. But it comes up like once every couple of years. Mostly I’m extremely satisfied.
Ally input needed....
OK, how do you transfer cash in and does it work well? How long does it take, etc?
Torin
I don’t. I just spend it. Usually I just hold on to it until I go out of town and need to pay my dog walker.
Deposits by check can be made on your phone or by mail and go through really quickly.
Ally input needed....
Sorry, I should have stated “transfer $$ in from other bank account” vs. “transfer cash”. Do you transfer $$ from another back account on a regular basis?
Torin
No, I only use Ally. It’s connected to Zelle though if your other bank is. Zelle is really easy to use.
Credit Card/Points Strategy
All of my cash is in Ally, and we’re moving most of my husband’s there too, but he still has a few storefront bank accounts that come in handy if we need cash quickly. I exclusively use Ally for my cash needs – my paycheck is deposited there (more than half goes straight to savings each pay period so I don’t see it in my checking, the balance in checking, which I use to pay off my bills). We have two savings accounts in Ally – one is our emergency fund, the other is where we put emergency fund overflow that gets used for house projects, transfers to investments, or transfers to checking to make up shortfalls if we have a heavy spending month.
The checking account will reimburse up to $10/mo (I think) in ATM fees, and since I almost never take out cash more than once a month, if that, that is not a concern. Though I don’t think it’s covers foreign transaction fees, and I would get another checking account solely for that purpose. I have a check book and otherwise make transfers from Ally to my credit cards, which go through pretty quickly (paid off my credit card on Friday, and the transaction cleared today).
To me, the high rate of interest balances out the inconvenience of not having a brick and mortar bank, but if you’re concerned about that, consider keeping whatever amount of cash you comfortably feel you need quick access to in your credit union. We’ve maybe taken advantage of this need once or twice in the last 5 years, but it’s nice to have the option for emergencies.
givemyregards
I used to have both Ally and Chase Bank accounts and would transfer money between the two – it took a few business days but wasn’t too bad. Eventually I closed the Chase account and just use Ally – I find it really handy to keep the majority of my cash in savings (so it gets higher interest and I’m less tempted to spend it) but have the ability to transfer between savings and checking instantly. As someone else pointed out, the inability to deposit cash is the only downside and that has literally only ever been an issue for me once, when everyone in the office paid me for staff holiday gifts. I just spent the next year using what I had collected as my personal ATM.
Anon
I keep seeing comments here about Ally and I’ve tried my hardest to restrain myself from posting this but I would never recommend anyone put their money there. Your response to this may be a cynical “what bank does?” but they just do not have the proper cybersecurity or data protection controls in place to protect their customers. This is not a matter of bashing the company (ask me how I know all this…) but a matter of firsthand knowledge that they have a lot of work to do in these areas. There are banks that offer the same APY with many more years of experience behind data protection and I would feel much safer going with those. Just my two cents.
Torin
We have a costco card and a citi double cash card, and then we each have a third card. The costco card is for gas (4%) and travel and dining (3%), the citi double cash (2%) is for everything else. The third card is really only for gifts to each other so we don’t ruin surprises by looking at statements, and potentially for some emergency.
Two cards is really all I can juggle in terms of switching back and forth for points purposes. The cards we have are both no fee (well, costco requires the membership, but we have that anyway, and we pay for the executive membership for which the cost is guaranteed in rewards, so it’s effectively $0). I haven’t done the math to see if we could get more points using cards with fees, but I sort of doubt it, and I just dislike paying credit card fees.
Anonymous
Why do you and your husband both have Chase Reserve? I have a Chase Reserve and made my husband an authorized user. Therefore, we only pay one $450 fee. I think there might be a fee for the authorized user – maybe $75. We still both get a Priority Pass card. The points earned are the same this way. We use Chase Reserve for all dining/travel purchases to get the triple points. However, we have a Chase Unlimited (no fee) that we use for everything else (get 1.5 instead of 1 point on those purchases if we used Reserve for non-dining/travel purchases. Then you can very easily transfer the points from Chase Unlimited to Reserve and still get the benefit of those points being worth more when you use them for travel.
Also, for others that might want to use Chase – have one spouse get a Chase Preferred card for 1 year. Get the sign-up bonus and then after one year downgrade it to the Chase Unlimited to avoid paying the annual fee. Have the other spouse get a Chase Reserve. You’ll get double the bonus points that way. I flew to Hawaii free this year using only points I earned from signing up for these cards.
Credit Cards/Points Strategy
It’s a good question – we got both initially to take advantage of the generous points offer 2 years back, which made it worth it. We would consider downgrading one and probably should move forward with that (once my husband finally takes advantage of the free Global Entry promo!).
Gail the Goldfish
I’ve got citi double cash I use from pretty much everything except Amazon and Lowe’s, which I have their own cards (5%) for. I have a chase something or other that has rotating categories, but I consistently forget what the category is. DH has an Uber card for 4% dining, but that’s too many cards for me to juggle/remember, so I just stick with my 2% citi.
I will choose Delta over pretty much anything else for work travel, unless another airline saves a significant amount of time/money. I travel a lot for work and have accrued quite a few skymiles. I am less good about prioritizing 1 hotel chain because they tend to vary more in offerings/cost than airlines, but I do try to stick with either a Marriot/SPG or Hilton brand instead of some of the other chains.
Grocery + gas points
If you want a grocery + gas card I’d recommend Amex Blue Cash Preferred – 6% on groceries up to $6k and 3% on gas.
Credit Card/Points Strategy
Thanks! I’ve been eyeing this, and it seems to be well worth the fees. Glad to hear you like it!
Anonymous
Seconding the Amex Blue Cash Preferred. I love mine!
Anonymous
Need an evening gown for a work event in a hurry, so please hit me up with your best Amazon options. I looked at photos of the event from past years, and it looks pretty evenly split between knee length vs floor length dresses and men in suits vs men in tuxes. Definitely on the more formal side – this isn’t a “work sheath with dressy accessories” event. Thanks!
Anonymous
More input please — What sizes and budget? Any hints you can give on styles you like/don’t like?
JS
Are you ok with knee length? This dress is incredibly well reviewed and comes in a million colors. It is true to size, but you’ll need pasties or a sticky bra. http://a.co/d/08dUIiN
Much more expensive but Jenny Yoo dresses are great quality: http://a.co/d/7CKv6NI
Aurora
I own this dress in navy (not the one with the buttons) and swear by it for formal work events. It feels buttoned up enough with the 3/4 sleeves yet is also very flattering.
https://smile.amazon.com/gp/product/B01J0SC82A/ref=oh_aui_search_detailpage?ie=UTF8&psc=1
Fatigue
I’ve recently been diagnosed with post viral fatigue that may be ME/chronic fatigue syndrom. I’m interviewing soon (hopefully) and need advice on what to say and when. It’s not impacting my work just now but it might in the future. I don’t want to interview under false pretenses.
Anonymous
Say nothing until you need an accommodation
eertmeert
+1
Cardigan?
Any recommendations for a black, straight-size cardigan, preferably from Nordstrom? I just need something to throw on at work to stay warm. Anything with reinforced elbows would be a plus. Thanks!