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- White House Black Market – 40% off select styles
And some of our latest threadjacks here at Corporette (reader questions and commentary) — see more here!
Some of our latest threadjacks include:
- What to say to friends and family who threaten to not vote?
- What boots do you expect to wear this fall and winter?
- What beauty treatments do you do on a regular basis to look polished?
- Can I skip the annual family event my workplace holds, even if I'm a manager?
- What small steps can I take today to get myself a little more “together” and not feel so frazzled all of the time?
- The oldest daughter is America's social safety net — change my mind…
- What have you lost your taste for as you've aged?
- Tell me about your favorite adventure travels…
momentsofabsurdity
Stuck on a bus — booooring.
Would love to get the hive’s thought on this article (whether or not one should take a two-week vacation):
http://finance.yahoo.com/news/taking-two-week-vacation-may-191903520.html
I have used very few of my vacation days — not because I don’t want to take vacations, but because I feel like it is frowned upon to use them. I’m not sure if that’s right or wrong, but I observe my boss’s reaction to other people taking more than a long weekend at the 4th, Memorial Day and Labor Day, and the week between Christmas and New Years as definitely negative. So when I go on vacation (like today), I usually overcompensate by doing at least a few hours of work each day.
How do others handle vacation time?
DC Darling
Seems short. I prefer my skirts at the knee or a little longer.
I work for the federal government so two week vacations are the norm….I feel sorry for my friends at law firms who have to fight just to get a long weekend. Then again I also make a fraction of what they make so it evens out in the end. I would say I agree mostly with the article, where you stand on the totem pole and your work environment (law, gov, non profit etc) should determine how much vacation time you can and should take.
ELS
I’ll have been at my firm a year before my first scheduled vacation, and then I’m just taking three days off at the end of the week to go to Vegas with my husband.
We also only get 5 days of vacation time our first year.
r
I also work for the federal government, and people in my agency frequently take 1, 2, and 3 week long vacations. I have about 3 weeks of use or lose vacation this year that I am hoping to take at once. My boss and her boss (and I know a number of others in my area) encourage us to use our vacation time.
I don’t think you should feel bad about using it – it is part of your compensation. And, as I heard one supervisor tell her employee yesterday, if you don’t take vacations, you will go crazy and end up sick like her!
Anon
I work for gov’t too and received personal days, but no vacation for my first year. I had a day and a half left towards the end of the year and I was encouraged to use them so I didn’t lose them. Now I have two weeks total in personal and vacation days. I’m planning on using all or most of them. I’ve already taken a one week vacation, but the rest of them will probably be taken one or two days at a time. I’d like to take another longer vacation but it does seem like taking too many of those is frowned upon in my office!
TNT
It depends on what your priorities are. I decided a long time ago, that I wanted to progress in my career, but that my job was not my life. So when there’s a conflict, life wins even if that means a small set back. I have a friend who prioritized the opposite way, which means she often cancels plans with friends and family because “something came up at work”. And more than a few times has taken a vacation day on paper and gone into work anyway. Her plan is to retire early, but we’ll see what happens when she gets there.
If you want to take your vacation and are feeling like you’re being discouraged, consider that vacation is one of your benefits, just like your paycheck. What would happen if your boss frowned on the fact that you actually took your entire paycheck instead of returning some of it to the company. That’s essentially what you’re doing by not taking your vacation and using it the way you want to. 2 weeks is a bit of a burden sometimes, I’ve done it, but rarely and usually only when I’m going somewhere a long plane ride away and I’ve given them lots of notice and set it up properly to make sure my work is covered. But I don’t think a full week during the year sometime is out of line. And I find when I take a real break from work regularly I am actually more energized and productive when I get back.
If you’ve already started this pattern of behavior, it’s going to be somewhat odd until either they get used to it or you changed jobs, but you need to make the decision what’s important to you.
DC Darling
I see this in the private sector more often that taking almost any time off from work, not coming in on weekends, putting family first, almost always translates to a perception that the person is less serious about their career, for both men and women. Not sure when we got here but I’m not happy about it.
MaggieLizer
Very well put. If you want to be able to take 2 week vacations and you work in an environment that frowns on that, maybe you don’t want to work there for the rest of your life anyway. You can probably get away with taking a two week vacation for a special occasion like a honeymoon, but other than that, bank the money you would’ve spent on the extra week and use it to get out of your cr*ppy job that much faster.
qwerty
i fought for 2 one-week each vacations my first year at the firm (totally frowned upon). then there was a a period of no vacations. this year has been good. i’ve taken a 2-week vacation to visit family that is half way across the world and it went over ok…though people wondered who i would ever want to travel that far. sometimes it’s that inconceivable to people that you work in order to have a life (rather than working is your life). i also took a shorter long weekend trip and hope to take at least one more this year, fingers crossed.
kerrycontrary
Employees are happier when they take their full vacation. While it may be frowned upon, I think as long as you get your work done and meet your quarterly or yearly objectives there should be no problem. If you are really worried about it you could straight up ask your boss and explain that you will prepare before and after to make up any missed work.
Blonde Lawyer
It is a know your office thing. Could you propose getting your unused time paid out at the end of the year instead? Like “hey boss, I know we have been way too busy for me to take my full x weeks of vacation. If I don’t use the remaining y weeks, can I get those paid out to me at the end of the year?”
I hear you though. At my office true vacations aren’t frowned upon but just “using vacation time” to take a day or week off for no reason is. So visiting family, going to a wedding, going out of the country, generally okay if it works with the rest of the firm’s schedule. Taking a staycation would result in people wondering why you need a break.
I’ve also noticed vacations stressed as needs instead of wants are more acceptable. IE: my husband and I are going to Florida for a week of relaxation might result in well, we will see if we can work that in the schedule. Whereas, my husband and I have to go to Florida for a reunion w/ the inlaws (accompanied with a disdainful eyeroll about how your family is just forcing you to take a break) would be met with understanding and accommodation. It is all in how you frame it.
AinRVA
Completely agree with this. We almost always tack vacations onto some other kind of “required” trip (wedding, visiting family) for this very reason. People at work are so much more accommodating when it’s an obligation that you just *have* to do (especially if you work in an eye-roll or two). Kind of sad, but it works.
Ashley
I just returned from a 10-day vacation, and I am so much more energized and productive! I didn’t realize how burned out I’d gotten until I actually unplugged for a while. As mentioned in the other comments, vacation is part of your compensation, so take it! Also, if companies know what’s good for them, they’ll realize that grinding employees into the ground for years on end isn’t going to make them more productive. Work product is better when the mind is open and the body is relaxed, particularly in creative fields. I’ve had so much more inspiration and drive since I’ve returned. My long vacation really made me question why I hadn’t done it before, because I’m really a much better employee after a break.
Midwest
Ditto. Aside from my maternity leave, I have never ever taken more than 5 consecutive days off at a time. Well, a few weeks ago, I realized I was completely burned out and just did it. I puttered around the house, hung out with family and friends, took naps and read. I can tell you I’m a much more pleasant (and productive) coworker to be around because I actually paid attention to what I needed to feel human again.
The older I get, the more I dislike the rat-race mentality that seems to permeate every office environment. It’s really not a healthy way to approach life, but it’s a hard trend to fight when you feel external pressure to be available at all times.
Sydney Bristow
I’m on a long term document review project, but luckily my supervisor is fine with me taking long vacations. I was away for a week a few months ago and will be taking 1.5 weeks off here pretty soon. The downside for me is that I only get paid for the hours that I work, so it’s not really like vacation time.
I do think it’s important to take more than just a couple of days off at a time each year, but I’ve luckily never been faced with the situation where it wouldn’t be allowed or would potentially hurt me professionally.
Kontraktor
This issue makes me so angry. Like others have said, PTO is part of one’s compensation package, so it really, really irritates me when offices have ‘standards’ that say that vacation is bad, that you can’t take PTO, etc.
Plus, I just find it sad that the norm in so many places is that you should apparently only ever work at your cr*ddy job and that’s it, that there is nothing more to life and you should never want anything more in life. Horrible. Life’s pleasaures and beauties are too great for me to give up on totally, especially when the ‘reward’ for my sacrifice probably wouldn’t be that great in the end (what career goal would be worth it to make in order to give up things like that? personally I don’t know of one).
I always try to take my PTO and maybe it’s a bad thing, but I am very firm about it. And I hope to work for organizations with good work life balance where people don’t really care if you take your PTO, so long as you are open about it and can plan reasonably when the situation allows. I try to consider what my attitude would be if I managed people, and honestly I would be more weirded out by somebody who never took PTO than a person who did take it all. I had an old coworker who took like 3 days off when his kid was born. Sorry but I definitely judged him for that, and had I been the manager, I would have ‘frowned’ more on him for that than had he taken FMLA leave/been gone for longer/etc.
Darby
I really like your perspective Kontractor! This and your fashion commentary has me wanting to high five you. Needed to say a little more here than “this”
Kontraktor
Daw. Thanks! //shuffles feet :-)
I love that there are so many great things to discuss here!
Ashley
THIS! Life is too short, I completely agree. I think it’s sad that we have it so backward in the US. We spend our days sitting behind a desk when we have able bodies, and then think we’re going to go explore the world when we retire at 65, with bodies that are less than able, and, quite frankly, a mind that is so worn out from the daily grind, that we can’t even enjoy all that life has to offer! My husband and I are already starting to try to build in some “extreme” adventures to take advantage of our fit bodies, because we don’t want to wait until we aren’t physically able to hike a mountain or scuba dive in the ocean. It’s not even about being lazy, it’s about being a whole human, complete with creativity and productivity and exertion for the sheer joy of it. Ok, I know I’m going off on a rant, but man this riles me up as I sit here at my desk :)
S
AMEN!
Kontraktor
I 100000000% agree. I try to live this life every day. This is what I want.
C.G.
I don’t have much to add, but it makes me so angry, too. I just hope I can find a place to work that has the attitude you’re describing, i.e., if you can get the work done, take all the time you’re entitled to!
If anyone has found this industry/company/career, please share!!
Kontraktor
Some of this does (fortunately or unfortunately) rest with you and your own desire to make an outward commitment to taking your time off. I used to be a little more worried about time off and would try to ask my bosses/dance around the issue a bit, but eventually I just got fed up with my bosses having hissy fits when I needed to do things like, you know, go to the doctor and so I started saying, scr*w it, a bit. Now I just tell my bosses if I am going to be out for a day or a few hours. I don’t ask first. They don’t own my life and I don’t need their permission to go to the doctor, have the plumber come, or buy a plane ticket for a 3 day weekend. Like, what am I going to do? Call my doctor’s office for an appointment, find out the appointment time, tell them I will call them right back, then ask my boss if it is okay to go to the doctor at the time?? No way. I’m making the appointment and then informing him, “I will be out for 2 hours this afternoon. This is just to let you know.”
It’s definitely harder to do in some offices rather than others, but definitely standing up for your PTO/time off no matter what and making a commitment to doing so is one way to make sure you get that time. Make it important to you and make that known to those you work with.
r
This is also my approach. I never ask, I just say “I’m going to be out [date].” Of course, in the govt, we have to have leave slips signed/approved, so I guess technically my boss could not approve it. I think I read somewhere that women tend to ask permission to take leave, while men tell their bosses they will me out. After reading that, I asked my boyfriend what he did, and he told me he told his boss when he would be out. Since then, I never went back to asking permission, and it hasn’t been a problem.
AN
I work for this sort of company. People get frowned upon if they don’t take their leave/holiday etc , regardless of whether it is a need or want. Then again, it isn’t in the legal field! But I work for an MNC and this is the norm even in the US office.
That said, I am in awe of the US work ethic that frowns upon vacations, based on all the comments above, and -dare I say it- glad I live elsewhere, as I just couldn’t NOT take my vacations!
Sydney Bristow
I know this totally depends on your office, but I think some bosses must respect employee’s who stand up for themselves and take all of their vacation time. As long as you get the things done you need to do before you leave, have a plan in place for work that comes up while you are gone, and work to catch up when you get back, I think it shows that you are willing to fight for what you want and need (which could translate into fighting for what is best for your company/customer/etc) and recognize that you can do better work throughout the year by taking the necessary breaks for yourself.
ChocCityB&R
Kontraktor, I didn’t read this until after my comment, but I agree with you 100%! Especially the part about career goals being worth giving up other pleasures in life. I’ve been struggling with this a lot lately, as I seem to feel like I need to decide if I want to prioritize my career or my “life” in the next few job moves. All of my friends value career, and I think I’ll feel like a loser if I don’t jump on that treadmill with them, but at the end of the race on the treadmill I’ll have gotten no where and I’ll be tired as hell, and is that really worth it?
Kontraktor
ChocCity, I totally understand what you mean about the internal conflict. I have had it before but now view it this way (my views might seem really cynical or fatalistic but I prefer to think of them as realistic based on my personal experiences and what I have observed). I will caveat this by saying that people’s priorities are of course personal and relative, but I am just explaining how I personally view this issue. // end important caveats
We all can’t be president. I mean this in the sense to say that we all can’t be one of the few types of ultimate high positions (CEO for a Fortune 10 company, Head of the UN, researcher of the cure for AIDS, etc) that might objectively make such sacrifices “worth it” because of the huge (huge) rewards you get in terms of influence, money, and life experience. I guess some people will argue that they are working for the “potential” to be that, but honestly 99.999% of us are never going to achieve this result so I think to “work” towards that just makes us sacrifice needlessly. The best we can probably realistically hope for is to be a manager, a partner, a division head… things that ultimately don’t get us *that* much money (even high level managers/division heads at Goldman’s don’t make more than 500k/year sometimes, and that’s pre tax) or that great of rewards in influence or life experience. They just give us a lot of meetings to go to, a lot of stress, and a lot of work hours where we never see our families, never do anything outside of work, etc. I look at that and for me, I say, why? Why do I want to give up everything that is beautiful in life outside of work to achieve the “prestige” of reaching the position of Generic Division Head of Company that ultimately might not make much difference anyway?
If that is what I truly am passionate about and what turly makes me satisfied and fulfilled, that is a 100% different story and I should pursue that goal because it is what will fulfill me.
But if I am trying to achieve that sort of goal at the expense of things I value more, simply “because” or because it means I am “career driven,” I think it is sacrifice that is needless and I would rather not be that position and have taken vacations, slept in on a random day, or had extra time lounge about in PJs at Christmas time. Ultimately I want a career that makes me excited to go to work every day, “prestigious” or not. To me, being happy to be at work each day, because you are doing work *you* find meaningful with people who motivate you to do your best, is the ultimate success. I also happen to think that is how you will make the most difference in the world- doing something you love, that makes you happy, that makes you truly 100% motivated in the most genuine sense to help your customers/clients achieve whatever service/result you are providing. Not being “the VP” or whatever title, simply because that is what I am told I should want to be if I want to be successful. I shun that.
Plus, there is the aspect of, at the end of the day when you are 95 and dying, what will you look back on and ponder and think about? Will you be happy you spent all those 16 hour days in meetings and that you came out with the title of VP but never saw the world, never had a free holiday without the Blackberry, never had control over your own time for what arguably might be very little reward? Or will you be happy you were maybe A Few Notches Under VP, ultimately probably made the same impact, but experienced the joys of travel, of family time, of watching your kids smile when you go to their plays, of really wanting to just play hookie for a day with your husband, of all those types of things you would have given up otherwise? Again this is just how I personally view things.
So, with that in mind, I think it is absolutely 100% worth it to prioritize things outside of work *if throwing yourself 100% into work doesn’t make you 100% happy.* Of course for some people working that much will be how they define a life of true happiness. But for people who don’t define life that way it is absolutely critical that you think about the things you value and whether giving them up would be 100% worth it *to you* and only to you in the end. It doesn’t matter what others thing. It matters how you live your life and what fires you up deep down!
ChocCityB&R
Kontraktor–this is so inspiring that I’m copying, pasting, and printing. It is going in my notebook of wisdom next to the David Foster Wallace Kenyon College commencement speech. You should become a life coach!
Darby
This time I’ll just say “this” — 100% agree with you. So well put.
I’d also add that a lot of people on here have some power to change the “office” as in the concept of “know your office” — if you are in a more senior position, help change the culture by your own actions — take vacations, don’t frown upon people choosing a little “life” over work. Next thing you know, we could all make blue nails the right choice for an interview . . .
(guess I said more than “this”)
Midwest
Kontractor, you rock and are wise beyond your years.
Kontraktor
Aw, thanks guys!! I just feel really strongly about this issue and want everybody to have a 1000% happy life and I get so mad when jobs or anybody otherwise infringes on people’s ability to enjoy their time, their youth, and all the great things the world gives us.
Bex
I spent last summer in Finland, studying for the bar online while my husband (an academic) worked on a research project. While I was there, I read an article about Finnish attitudes towards summer vacation that blew my mind.
Here’s a quote: “Four weeks has emerged from Finnish labour legislation as the ideal length of a summer holiday. … The best sign of a holiday well spent is that when returning to work, one does not necessarily even remember how the coffee maker works. It is a good idea to gradually ease oneself back into work. For example, you can return to work on a Wednesday so the burden of work for that week doesn’t feel so great.”
FOUR WEEKS. !!! Incredible. Many Finns have little rustic summer cabins in the woods where they disappear to for their vacations: they swim, hike, and hang out in their saunas and soak in the round-the-clock sunshine.
American workaholism is really revealed to be the slavery that it is when you visit countries that value a healthy balance of leisure.
anon in SF
No kidding on how different European attitudes towards vacation are. I stayed with some family friends on a trip through Bordeaux last year, and we were talking about work life balance. I’m a lawyer, been practicing for about 6 years. The couple I stayed with were both doctors, though a bit further along in their careers (mid 40’s). One worked in primary care, the other was a surgeon. They were *horrified* by how little vacation Americans get, and that you are judged negatively if you take it. The doctors each got something like 5 weeks off, and it seemed like they took almost all if not all of it.
Kontraktor
Some European offices close down entirely in the week between Christmas and New Year’s, and that’s in addition to the vacation time people get. If only I lived and worked there!
naijamodel
I work in higher ed in the U.S. and we do this :D
Tina
The minimum vacation in the EU is actually 4 weeks per year and you are obliged to take at least 2 weeks in one piece.
Bella
Yup! I get 5 weeks + 6 or so bank holidays if they happen to fall during the workweek. You have to use 3 weeks and can bring 2 to the next year. I did not have a long holiday last year, so I did just that and then took a whole month off earlier this year. I took one week to attend a seminar across the pond and keep the rest for fall/winter.
I love taking vacation! I also enjoy work, but it’s nice not to work for a bit and to see some other things, to open my mind a bit. I also like having a day or two at home after travelling.
Most people here go on holiday once or twice a year, and take a few breaks of one or two days. (Attend a wedding, go to a fetival, long weekend city trip.) Plus we tend to take they time between christmas and NY off.
EC MD
As a physician in the US, I would say that many of us take vacation and regularly. I have 4 weeks/year plus a week of CME. I have taken almost all of it. We did 10 days in Hawaii and it was fabulous! But, the expectation in my medical community is direct patient care 4 days a week, with the 5th day a mix of catch up and personal time. Its a lovely work life balance. As I look forward to having #2, I have no concerns about working “full-time” here and remaining remotely sane.
anon
I’m in Europe and my office *required* us to take 3 weeks of vacation time during the summer (OK, not for our well-being, but still).
It also closes down between Christmas and New Year’s Eve.
E.
You compared full-time employment with a comfortable salary and benefits to slavery? Really? Little overdramatic, doncha think?
Bex
Comfortable salary and benefits? I wish I had that, but I’m unemployed.
I do think our American economic system is often exploitative. It’s obviously not the *same* as slavery. But one of the definitions of slavery is “severe toil; drudgery,” which I think is an apt description of a job that drains your energy and from which you have absolutely no rest.
E.
I’d consider paid vacation to be a benefit and very few non-salaried workers get it, so yes, everyone this comment thread applies to – including your ridiculous comparison to slavery – has a comfortable salary and benefits. I don’t see what your current employment status has to do with the offensiveness of your comment.
SV in House
I am taking my first 2 week vacation since my honeymoon later this summer. I realized two things. (1) When I take 1 week off, I spend the first couple of days finishing things before I can let go, then start stressing about the work that is piling up at the end of the week. So, there are only a couple of days when I am truly relaxed. (2) My European colleagues take 2-3 weeks off, not checking email, etc. The company manages just fine. So, off I go!
qwerty
Do any of you work at law firms or other jobs where you don’t have formal PTO or other vacation time? If so, what does that really look like in your experience?
Kontraktor
Where I work now, we don’t have separate sick leave or contingency leave, which sucks. We just have one big pot of PTO hours that acrue to be taken for whatever reason we want. I hate it because you never know when you could get sick and wipe all your PTO. I knew some people who got bad flus in October and then couldn’t take any time off at Christmas because they had to use all their PTO to recover from their fevers/vomiting/etc (like they were flus where you couldn’t come to work). So, that often keeps me from taking PTO for time off/vacation because I just don’t know when I might get stricken by the black plague and have to be away from work. Also, if there is ever a weather disaster or other type of contingency (say for example the earthquake in DC), there is rarely any provision to let us charge like ‘office closure leave’ or ‘contingency leave’ or anything like that. So, if a snowstorm blocks all the roads and we physically can’t get to work, we have to take PTO. So absurd. I like the number of hours I get, in general, but I really really hate not having sick or contingency time because it really makes it hard to use time for the leisure/personal activities it’s meant to be used for.
Before I moved, we did have a flex schedule where I could work any number of hours per day within the week. So, I would bank PTO by say, working four 10 hour days and then taking a ‘free’ Friday off. But, at my new office I have zero flex time so it’s honestly a really horrible situation to be in when you have to take PTO for every.little.thing and there is no way around it, all while you are trying to save for a rainy day and also regular vacation time.
Eleanor
Attorneys don’t have formal time off at my firm (staff do, though), and I’m still trying to figure out how it actually works. In the nine months I’ve been here, only partners have taken substantial time off, and those vacations have been a week at a time to go on vacation with their families. I’ve seen associates take a day or two here and there to make a long weekend, but that’s it. I’ll be interested to see what happens over the summer. I feel like I should also sniff out from other associates how this actually works. Some of them have families; I can’t imagine they never go on a real vacation (we’re not Biglaw).
eh230
My former firm was like yours. Unfortunately, associates never went on real vacations unless they get married or some other large event. Trying to take an additional day off over a long weekend was also a nightmare. One 4th of July, I took an extra day off to travel to an out of state wedding. I ended up working on a brief in the hotel room for the whole weekend except during our travel time and the time I spent at the actual wedding. Corporate life is so much better! My boss encourages me to take my vacation, and if we don’t take a certain amount, we lose it at the end of the year. Hurray!
Eleanor
Yikes, that sounds terrible (your former firm; where you work now sounds great). That seems kind of outrageous for a firm this size, at at these (small law) salaries. Hopefully my sniffing around won’t be so bad.
anon
My firm does not have any formal PTO for attorneys. As long as you take care of all your business and you meet your goals, you can do what you like. Most recently, that was a one week vaca in south america. Actually, I had one outstanding deadline, and one of the partners offered to cover for me so that I wouldn’t have to worry about it. So yeah, no PTO isn’t so bad.
anon
this also means I come and go in and out of the office as I please, which is fantastic. I don’t know how I could work at a more traditional firm again!
Wednesday
I went from 5 weeks PTO (European company) to 3 weeks (American). It has been a hard adjustment to the different cultural attitudes. I get a lot of passive aggressive behavior when I return from vacation, regardless of length. Most recently when I returned from a two day break, a manager mentioned to everyone on ALL our meetings that day, that I had been gone, when trying to explain a slight delay (which was no fault of mine! Our UK offices were celebrating the Queen’s jubilee).
I feel that there is a lot of pressure to not take vacation, because that indicates commitment to work – and Americans take this as a badge of honor. But I find this ridiculous. I need my vacation to recharge! I take all my vacation, even though I know it makes me look less good – but I have to if I am going to see any family, who are all at least 6 hours away.
May
Fate! A coworker took two days of planned leave midweek. Stated a totally reasonable explanation too. A colleague was rolling his eyes and making some very pointed comments to others in that group about her leaving them holding the baby which was just crass. The worst of it was that the others seemed to fall in line with him!
I am entitled to some leave soon, prior to a professional assessment, and now I’m downright scared of asking to use that leave. Bet they’d be horrid when I got back!
May
Forgot to mention it makes me downright angry too!!
S
The way I see it if you don’t take your full paid vacation you are working for free those days and not valuing your own worth.
Intl orgs...
Working in an international organization, there’s a major double standard on this. People posted outside their country of nationality can easily take a 4-week vacation every August and another week or two around the holidays, no questions asked. In fact, it’s just assumed that they will and managers make sure that their non-national staff don’t have projects assigned for August or the holidays. In the meantime, here I am a US national based in DC but from the other side of the country, and I get stuck covering for half my department every August and Christmas. I haven’t been home for the holidays since 2008. Theoretically I have 5 weeks a year of vacation plus comp time for weekend and holiday travel, but the only time I’ve used more than three or four days at a time is when I maxed out my accumulated leave days and I had to take a week. And yes, I answered emails during that week.
Sorry for the rant, but it really ticks me off. Just because it doesn’t take me 24 hours to travel home doesn’t mean I wouldn’t like to get the eff out of DC in August or actually spend enough time at home to see all of my family. Ugh.
Senior Attorney
I am wearing this skirt in red today and I love it! I’m 5’2″ and the non-petite size hits me mid-knee.
When I was at The Medium Sized Law Firm I never took all my vacation. It wasn’t the firm culture to take significant time off, and I felt like if I ever left I would get paid for it so it was like a savings account. What ended up happening was that when I made partner all that accrued vacation time (about 5 weeks) went *poof*! I am quite sure that was a wage and hour law violation — technically speaking, I had terminated my employment with the firm to enter into a new relationship as an equity partner. Therefore, I am quite sure that under the labor laws I should have been paid for my accrued vacation. At the very least, it should have been counted towards my capital contribution. Of course, nobody mentioned a word about it and I wasn’t about to make waves. But that was more than 15 years ago and I’m still ticked off about it.
Now I am in the public sector and we have a “use it or lose it” policy and the culture is very much in favor of taking all your leave time. In fact, we have a meeting in January where we all sit down with the calendar and coordinate dates. I’m taking three weeks in January for a big trip to Southeast Asia. Super excited about it!
Jill
VacaTion? PTOOEY!
ML
Speaking of vacations being frowned upon and eye rolls, etc., does anyone else get annoyed when people (pointedly) count your “vacation” and include weekends? This drives me nuts. Example: After I’d been at my firm 11 months, I took my first day off work at christmas. I took 3 days of PTO, plus the firm was closed on Friday for xmas and on another day for new years. So I got a full week but only took three days PTO. Of course I tacked on the weekends on either end. So, I was out of the office ten days, but that included 4 weekend days and 2 holidays. SO many people made reference to “your 10 day absence” or “your 10 day vacation” and i’m like, m***F**s that was not a “10-day vacation!!” wtf! that was, at most, a five day vacation between CHRISTMAS and NEW YEARS and technically only a 3 day vacation! (plus I answered emails and worked two full days of that time remotely). And it was barely enough time to travel to see both my family and my inlaws.
Pfff. Irritating!
qwerty
hate this. i always tack on weekends and it’s painful. as if i’m not allowed to travel on red eyes and try to make the most of my time because it makes me “unavailable” and counts as time out… ugh.
ChocCityB&R
Two weeks is too long for me to be away from work, so this has never been a problem. BUT, I’d like to work in a place where I can take two yearly vacations, one holiday visit the family for a week vacation, and one go to bermuda and soak up the sun vacation. So technically, I want to use my two weeks, but not all at once. I’ve never been viewed poorly for doing so, but I’ve never worked in private practice.
sweetknee
Well, I have a funny leave/vacation story.
Years ago, after baby # 2, I returned to work after 6 weeks. The first week back, my a$$ of a boss and I were in an attorney’s meeting with several other lawyers in the firm. I asked a question about some motion that had been heard, and he said “Oh, that happened while you were on your vacation” ( referring to my maternity leave).
I smiled sweetly and tld him that when he pushes something the size of a watermelon out of something the size of his nostil and calls it a vacation, I would agree with him. Two other female lawyers in the meeting applauded.
Of course, this is also the guy who ( allegedly jokingly) offered me and his other top associate a bonus to get our tubes tied. ( We were both pregnant and due within a month of each other.)
I stayed about 9 more months, and quit for an in house job.
Kontraktor
Sometimes I wish I could wear a wire on me at all times so I could capture exchanges like this and sue the !@#)($* out of these types of people.
b23
This seems like a much better alternative to the J. Crew cotton pencil skirt, which I have sworn off for life.
AIMS
Out of curiosity, what’s wrong with the JCrew cotton pencil skirt? I haven’t tried it, but considered ordering at one point in some bright happy color.
I like this skirt in theory, but am reluctant to order because the other Halogen skirt (“THE” skirt) really didn’t work on my figure. Ladies who have tried both, does this fit the same as THE skirt?
anon
Not the OP, but I didn’t like Jcrew’s cotton No.2 because the fabric was pretty stiff, didn’t drape nicely, and the fabric wrinkled pretty easily so that I’d feel like a frumpy mess after sitting down for 1/2 hour. But, the colors are so pretty the I keep getting tempted.
b23
Yup, it wrinkles and stretches out immediately. You really look frumpy right away. Resist the urge! It’s not worth it!
anon
I did get the it in the corduroy last fall – but that’s about the only fabric I’ve tried on in the No.2 that I actually like. A little stretchy, soft, no fabric wrinkles.
Recent grad
No 2’s are the best skirts for my body so I’ve foolishly given the cotton version a try too many times. I looked like a wrinkly mess by lunch. And it stretched out definitely a whole size, maybe even two. It certainly didn’t keep the original shape I love do much. Sadly I’m still on the hunt for a good summer weight light beige colored skirt to replace it. Any recs?!
TurtleWexler
I have two of them and I’ve never had such a problem with either of them. They do get a bit wrinkly, but definitely not enough to make me feel self-conscious or stop me from wearing them. Never noticed any stretching. And I actually like the stiffness of the fabric, it is quite flattering on me for some reason. But I feel like I’m in the minority on this one.
AIMS
Wow, thanks guys! That’s quite a consensus! I will continue to resist then!
Cat
I will be an enabler. I have it in navy and khaki because the shape works with my shape. Yes, you can get lap wrinkles fairly quickly, but they can be mitigated by doing a little “tuck” when you sit down (so that the fabric that would normally be bunched up across your hips instead is folded under – sort of like an old school motel comforter that doubled over and then laid across the tops of the pillows).
b23
Cat, did you buy it tight? Because it’s not only the wrinkles for me, it’s that it gets way too big – a full size, or even two. So it’s really unflattering by midday.
CW
I have both The Skirt and also the J Crew No. 2, and while I like The Skirt, I actually think the J Crew skirt is more flattering on me. Yes, in cotton they do wrinkle a bit, but nothing outrageously terrible. I think I prefer the J Crew skirts and will stop buying The Skirt.
Cat
@b23 – I bought it to fit snugly when I first put it on, knowing that the j.crew cotton gives somewhat. So it’s mildly too tight while I’m walking to work, but perfect after I sit down for 10 mins.
MissJackson
I’ll be another dissenter to the rest of the hive. I have the cotton skirt in a couple of colors. The black is just fine. Yes, it wrinkles, but you really can’t notice on the dark color. It’s very flattering on my (H) shape, and the cotton is just the right weight for the summer.
I also have the off-white/light khaki one. It wrinkles more visibly, but I mitigate by pulling it down before I sit. I also usually wear it with a structured blouse that does not need to be tucked in, or I cover it up with a cardigan or blazer. In short, it’s not perfect, but I still like and wear it.
And finally, I have a coral colored one, which also wrinkles a bit but is not nearly as visible as the light khaki. The color is fabulous, so it’s possible that I’m too blinded by that to care.
I’m intrigued that others say that it stretches. I hadn’t noticed that, and I’ve worn mine a couple of times each. Maybe mine were a little tight at first and I’ve already forgotten/blocked it from my memory? For what it’s worth, I ordered my usual No. 2 size. I’m a total No. 2 devotee, though — I haven’t found anything else that fits me perfectly without alteration.
Anon
I own three and have never noticed any stretching, weird! I do get lap wrinkles, but I usually get the same wrinkles with most pencils.
Bonnie
THE skirt does nothing for me but this one fits great.
PghAnon
Same here, this one is perfect if you are not quite curvy enough for The Skirt but too curvy for the J Crew pencil skirts (which also I love the look of, but always have to get taken in at the waist).
Ellen
This skirt is fantastick!!! I am going tomorrow to NORDSTROM’s with my MOM. She is pickeing me up in her car and we are driveing to the WHITE PLAINS store for me to get ready for Pitsburgh.
I have to fly with the manageing partner FIRST thing Sunday morning! UGH! He does NOT want to go MONDAY b/c the depos start at 2 in the afternoon and is worryed about bad weather. I am going with his freqent flyer miles, so it is NOT costing the firm anything. I ONLY have Saturday to get ready and will NOT be home for mabye 3 days.
Anonymous NYer
Oh super, I’m heading to the same nordstrom’s tomorrow. I’ll be sure to look out for you, Ellen.
SAlit-a-gator
TJ: I’m hosting a dinner party next week and one of the people attending is a gluten and lactose intolerant vegetarian! She’s a good friend and is genuinely gluten intolerant – not doing it as a diet. Everybody else is open to anything I may serve up. I’m looking for menu planning suggestions and potential recipies. So far I’ve only come up with mixed veggie tacos on corn tortillas, maybe something with polenta, or some sort of asian inspired rice dish (if I can find a gluten free teriaki sauce!). A lot of vegetarian dishes rely on pasta, and that obviously out becuase of the gluten free restriction. Also, the no cheese thing is killing most of my ideas (goat cheese stuffed mushrooms? no!). Please help me hive! Any menu planning suggestions?
TNT
Look at Indian food. A lot of things in that vein will be gluten free. There are a lot of great lentil dishes that would work. One suggestion…try Chana Masala.
NOLA
Oh yeah! I forgot – Jane Brody’s curried lentils used to be one of my favorite dishes – with brown rice. I usually serve it with pita bread and plain yogurt but your one guest doesn’t need to eat that (unless you can find gluten free pita?)
NOLA
Have you thought about using rice noodles? You could also do something with eggplant that doesn’t involve cheese (maybe use tofu instead of ricotta and make a kind of lasagna?)
TCFKAG
How about a sweet potato curry? I love sweet potato curry served with rice. And since its usually made with coconut milk, its okay for lactose free.
TCFKAG
I’ve done a few different ones, but this one looks good:
http://www.food.com/recipe/sweet-potato-curry-with-spinach-and-chickpeas-84474
Another option is Lentil Soup. Which is nice because you could prepare it before hand and then focus on salad, appetizers, etc.
TCFKAG
This lentil and sweet potato soup would also be good (again, served maybe with a salad and you could do some kind of grilled asparagus, mixed grilled veggies appetizer if you wanted.)
http://www.thedailygreen.com/healthy-eating/recipes/5077
Jules
This looks great. Here’s another one that someone posted here several weeks ago; I made it, and it was very good.
http://www.thekitchn.com/recipe-braised-coconut-spinach-chickpeas-with-lemon-164551
DC Law
Quinoa, lentils, chickpeas, and potatoes are all great starches that don’t have gluten. If I were you I’d make mujadarra (you can find a recipe online), which is lentils and rice cooked with cumin and onions, and I’d maybe add butternut squash or even potatoes to make it feel more substantial. That and a fresh salad makes a hearty and delicious meal!
rosie
I like a chopped salad (think cubed tomatoes, cucumbers, red onion, peppers) with lemon juice and spices as a side with mujadarra.
Leslie Knope
Yes, mujadarra! I used to eat that all the time in my broke vegetarian days. It’s super-easy, too. The one downside is the presentation–it just isn’t a very pretty dish on its own.
rosie
Stuffed peppers (stuff with any combination of veggies, rice, black beans, lentils). I like the rice noodle suggestion, I also love sweet potato noodles. If you do an Asian-inspired dish, you could make some lettuce wraps as a side dish or appetizer. I would use veggies, cubes of tofu, and cashews in the filling. You don’t need to find teriyaki sauce–get a wheat free soy sauce (shouldn’t be too hard) and mix it with fresh ginger, garlic, sesame oil, chili oil/sauce if you want it spicy–it’s easy to make your own stir fry sauce.
r
You could try a risotto using vegetable stock, pretty simple to make, albeit labor intensive. Especially yummy with asparagus if you can find some that is good this time of year.
Bette
I vote for some sort of vietnamese dish. I have a friend with similar dietary restrictions and we always eat asian food when getting together. I think sticking to cuisines where these types of ingredients aren’t used is the best. That way no one is “missing” it.
Blonde Lawyer
I am gluten intolerant and lactose intolerant and I still make some of my favorite dishes w/ rice pasta and veggie shreds fake cheese. Also, w/ lactose pills, I can handle the allegedly “low/no lactose” cheeses like cabot sharp cheddar and goats cheese w/ enzymes. I can’t handle them w/o the pills though so I don’t buy that they are truly lactose free for all.
I also second risotto. My husband buys a kind that comes in a box in the organic aisle and it is super creamy but dairy free. Not sure what’s in it but it doesn’t make me sick.
I find big mushrooms, mild peppers, squash and zucchini all very filling too.
Sydney Bristow
I’m not gluten intolerant, but I think I read that some people can get sick from food being prepared on the same surface as food with gluten. You might want to ask your friend about that.
Banker
Yes, one of my parents has celiac disease and I would honestly have trouble cooking for them, and I’m privy to a lot of the rules around it. It sucks.
TCFKAG
If you’re friend or family is THAT gluten intolerant or celiac, they would either likely offer to bring their own food or you would at least know.
Gluten intolerance comes in a variety of levels of severity. While its wise not to use the same cooking utensil you just used to cut bread, I don’t think you can completely eliminate all gluten from a kitchen.
Sydney Bristow
That’s kind of what I thought, which is why I suggested asking the friend about it just to make sure there is no miscommunication.
FormerPhotog
Cooking Light had an awesome quinoa stuffed tomato recipe in the June issue. It did have a little cheese on top, but frankly, you could either sub with soy or leave off entirely – I ate the leftover stuffing as a salad minus cheese and it was plenty flavorful.
It was the Baked tomatoes with quinoa, corn and green chiles. You can make the filling and such ahead, too, and then just bake it off when you’re ready
JessBee
I made that, too! It was delicious, and I agree that it would work great without the cheese, too.
E.
Beans and rice (like a Central American gallo pinto)? Easy to make, filling, and so yummy. You could make a cheeseless side salad and get gluten-free brownies for her dessert.
SAlit-a-gator
Excellent suggestions hive! Thank you so much for your help. I’m way less intimidated by this now and looking forward trying something new. I’ll keep you posted on how it goes :-)
Kanye East
G00gle “gluten-free girl.” Tons of wonderful recipes.
PS: Tamari is a g-f alternative to soy sauce (for teriyaki).
SAlit-a-gator
Thanks Kanye!
Merabella
I know a lot of you buy stuff on Amazon. I’ve never really gotten my supplements from there, any experiences that I should know of before I buy?
DC Darling
Tips I’ve learned to live by when buying off of Amazon.
1. Only buy things I already own/have tried on/know the sizing etc so that I don’t have to return it.
2. Only buy from vendors that are amazon approved (not sure what the correct terminology is) but I hate buying something and learning that I need to make a stop at the post office to return it. I’d rather just email amazon and have them come pick it up the next day. So much easier.
But I do love amazon. I find my staples there for much cheaper than retail. Returning is the only hassle.
Anonymous
Limit your search to things that are “prime eligible” or “free super saver shipping” which are those items where shipping and returns are handled by Amazon. Otherwise, your product is being shipped by a random vendor using Amazon as a platform, and you are subject to their whims. Many of these vendors are probably fine and have great customer service, but some can be terrible and the return process a nightmare, the products not at all what described, etc. I don’t have enough time to worry about it, so I just buy the amazon-only items.
Sydney Bristow
Supplements like vitamins and minerals? I purchased vitamins online recently and started at Amazon but kept seeing one company name as the seller, so I wound up purchasing through them directly. It is Swanson Health Products. The vitamins were exactly what I expected and the price was better than others, so I recommend looking for that seller on Amazon or buying directly from them. They shipped really quickly for me and I found a coupon code online.
Meghan
I work for a supplement manufacturer and Amazon is actually one of my largest accounts. Be sure you purchase directly from Amazon. As a previous commenter said, you will have the option for free shipping, but there are third parties that offer this as well. Make sure it says “shipping from Amazon” on the product page.
I have bought supplements from third parties before, and the dating was not good, as their sell through rates are far slower than Amazon’s.
N.
Question on heel wearing — when you wear heels, how much are you usually walking today? I can’t tell if it’s my feet that are wimpy or if I’m just walking more than heels are intended for. I’d say I walk a bare minimum of 30 minutes a day, just getting to and from the metro, and on average probably more like 60 minutes a day in 10 minute bursts (to the gym and back, to lunch and back, etc). I have very few shoes that can survive this. Is it me or the shoes?
Signed, someone who wore uncomfortable shoes today and is already regretting it…
Former MidLevel
It is not you. It takes a while to get used to walking in heels, and you can lose your tolerance if you don’t do it for a while. But for what it’s worth, I never wear my heels while commuting – I wear flats for the trip to/from work, then change into my heels at the office. It makes your heels last much longer and saves your feet.
RussiaRepeat
I never wear heels for my commute (though I see lots of women who do). Almost all of my heels live under my desk and I swap out the very high ones for flats when I run out to get my lunch. It’s a combination of caring for my feet (family history of bunions I’m probably doomed to get) and caring for my shoes (city living is really hard on shoes).
cfm
I think people wearing heels to walk to the metro are crazypants. i wear them in the office and to grab lunch but never to commute. anytime i see a woman wearing heels to commute i want to be like why! but they are more talented than me i guess
TCFKAG
This is why my heels live under my desk and I have flats for commuting. I probably walk no further than to the bathroom and back to my desk in my heels.
Unless I have to hoof it to an interview or something, but then I sometimes STILL tote my flats with me and stick them in my purse, because I’m a wimp.
Cat
Joining the chorus re: the commute – my heels either live under my desk or carried to work with me. No sense wasting “high heel tolerance time” pounding the concrete.
AIMS
I used to wear heels all the time. Now I mostly wear flats or wedges for commuting and keep heels under my desk for office hours. I know they’re not for everyone, but I find wedges to be a good compromise – I am comfortable and my shoes don’t get stuck in grates the way stilletos would, but I also still feel totally put together.
FWIW, I would probably wear heels more if my apartment was closer to the subway (ten min. walk).
Always a NYer
I agree, wedges are my absolute favorite type of shoe. They are so much more comfortable than traditional heels as well as most of the flats I own/have tried on. My work shoes and casual sandals are wedges and I’m looking for a pair of wedge knee-high boots atm. Can’t say enough good things about the wedge shoe =)
qwerty
i wear heels during my commute now but that’s because i don’t have a commute. it takes 10 minutes door to door and there’s minimal walking to/from the subway. when i had a real commute, i wore flats.
NOLA
I wear my heels to work but my commute is get in the car at home, drive 10 minutes, walk from the parking garage to my office. During the school year, I am sometimes on my feet much more during the day teaching and doing other things, but I get enough time off my feet to make that okay.
long time lurker
I could not do what N does in heels. I wear my heels around my office, on trips to court (involving the subway and walking 2-3 blocks) and if I have to go to an event or lunch (and those days, my feet hurt). If I know I have an active day I will wear flats. I could not do my commute in heels (subway, 10 min walk).
E.
I only wear heels to walk around on the carpeted floor in my office building, and maybe to walk no more than 3 blocks to get coffee or lunch. So maybe 30 minutes in a day, total.
JessC
It may be a little bit of both. It takes time to build up the muscles that and gain a “tolerance” for wearing heels. I wear heels daily – on a typical day I don’t walk quite as much as you. But if I’m on the road for business or attending a function straight from work, I’ll be walking/standing in heels for just as much time if not more and I usually don’t have significant problems. For me, one of the keys is heel height. I have rather small feet (6.5) and rarely wear heels over 3 inches. I find 2″-2.5″ is pretty much the idea height for me as it still gives me some height but is still pretty comfortable to walk in.
N.
Well, I’m really glad to know that it’s not just me. Doesn’t save me from my folly today, but maybe I’ll start commuting to and from the metro at least in flats!
Anon
I ordered this skirt and returned it back when the women’s sale was going on. I found it ran about a size smaller than the Halogen seamed pencil skirt, which I have and love in multiple colors. I also thought it ran a little on the short side, but I have freakishly long legs. The fabric and colors were nice though.
Merabella
Has anyone tried this skirt on? Does it fit like “the skirt”?
Maddie Ross
It does not fit exactly like The Skirt, but is similar. I have it in two colors and The Skirt in 6 colors. If The Skirt fits you, I think this one will too, but order up a size from The Skirt. I wear an 8 in this one and a 6 in The Skirt. I originally ordered a 6 in this and it looked like the tight spandex skirts from the 80s a la Saved by the Bell.
Merabella
Thanks. I ordered a size up. It didn’t look as stretchy as The Skirt, so I thought I’d play it safe. I broke the shopping ban I had placed on myself… oh well.
SAB
Tried this skirt on and thought it ran small. Glad to know that it fits differently than TheSkirt.
DC Darling
Shopping TJ- I have been hunting for a work dress for awhile now. I already own a beautiful BR sheath in cream (won’t link to avoid moderation but I think it’s called the cap sleeve sheath on their site) and I would really love a long sleeved or elbow length sleeved sheath dress. I’ve been looking at the Target Merona ponte dress with elbow length sleeves but it’s all out of my size. Alternatively I like the Suzi Chin for Maggy Boutique faux ruched wrap dress at Nordies but the 100$ price tag is daunting for one jersey dress. Any help ladies? A dress in the middle range?
I know someone will suggest heart my closet but again, 100$ price tag (including lining) is a bit much for a first time purchase from a vendor I have no experience with.
TCFKAG
I own this in the purple and its lovely (I also own the Target Merona ponte dress and its similar though I like the long sleeves on this).
The neckline is a little lower then the Suzi Chin I think, but I’ve worn it to work and not felt uncomfortable. I know usually at Talbots it says to order maybe a size down, but this I’d say order true to size or maybe even a size up.
http://www.talbots.com/online/browse/product_details.jsp?id=prdi28016&rootCategory=cat90030&catId=cat80018&sortKey=Default§ion=Sale&conceptIdUnderSale=cat90030
TCFKAG
This also looks like it would fit your needs, though I have not personally tried it on.
http://www.talbots.com/online/browse/product_details.jsp?id=prdi28252
DC Darling
I really like the detail on that dress but am wary of v necks. I have so many and I end up having to pin them all because I am large of bust relative to my size.
….but I am in love with that deep blue color. Doing it anyway. Thanks TCFKAG. Ever considered a professional women’s wear consulting business? Seriously.
a lawyer
I always have a problem with V necks as well, but I happened to try this on yesterday n a 2 petite. (Often I need a 0 petite at Talbots). The neck was fine, no problem whatsoever with gaping or having to remember not to lean over. However, it was a little tight on me and I did not buy it. Perhaps it was just the fact that it was about 95 degrees outside and the long sleeves were too much, but you may want to size UP on this one. I did really like the dress.
AIMS
TCFKAG – I have the first dress in black. Agree that it’s very flattering but question – do you find that it attracts lint like crazy? Mine is the worst, but I am wondering if it’s just the black color. Also, is yours a bit itchy? Mine is not great without a slip, but maybe I am too sensitive?
Anonymous
Yes, TCFKAG, please give it a full pro/con review – I have it sitting in my cart now.
TCFKAG
I have not found that the purple attracts lint particularly strongly. Can’t speak for the black of course. I have a white dog though with white fur and so the fact is that ALL my clothes are always covered in white fur…but the purple dress isn’t noticeably more so.
I am small of chest and the v maybe gaps a tiny bit, but I wear a cami under it and don’t worry about it. The only reason I might size up is that the sleeves and skirt part on me are a bit tight, but not seriously, and since I wear hose everyday I don’t worry about it. I think its quite flattering and nice. But if you have particularly muscular arms, it could theoretically be a problem.
Basically, its like the best dress I’ve bought in a long time. Not too many cons.
Cat
I ordered the Talbots dress in two sizes and ended up returning both. I am an XS/S in Jcrew tops and a 4/6 in bottoms. The 4 was great on top, but too clingy around the hips for work. The 6 was way too big (in the waist, particularly) but good around the hips. The fabric felt substantial. I didn’t have the dress on long enough to speak to itchiness or lint, though.
Ellie
I am so in love with this dress: http://m.jcrew.com/mt/www.jcrew.com/womens_category/suiting/super120s/PRDOVR~48444/48444.jsp. It’s expensive but I always get lots of compliments. I also managed to snag t in bright purple when it was marked down.
Emily I
My boss’s assistant may have gotten some bad news yesterday. She was out to attend medical tests with her husband, who was a heavy smoker. I understand that they had biopsied a spot on his lungs previously and that he had a scan of some sort yesterday. This morning she has been in my boss’s office with the door closed, which is unusual. (He is out of the office today, so she is in there by herself.)
She is a wonderful person. Always helpful, friendly, and professional. I feel terrible for her. But – and this is a big but – no one is supposed to know what’s been going on with her husband. She apparently told my boss in confidence about the situation and he let is slip to others. Now the whole office knows, but we’re all pretending like we don’t know.
I suppose the right thing to do for now is nothing. Any advice on what to say or what I could do when she does tell others what is going on? We definitely have the sort of relationship where I could give her a hug, but I’d like to do something beyond that if it’s appropriate.
Midwesterner
That is sad. I would let her know that you understand that any personal issues will take priority over any work she does for you for the time being.
Midori
A squeeze on the shoulder and a concerned “Is everything okay?” might let her know it’s okay to talk if she needs to. It’s lonely to feel like you have to keep something like that all quiet. If she doesn’t want to talk about it, let her not talk about it. And Midwesterner is right, too.
rosie
If you are going out for lunch or coffee, can you use asking if she wants you to grab anything for her as an excuse to knock on the door and check on her?
Anonymous
Does anyone remember the title of the book recommended for applicants for government jobs? It was mentioned here several months ago; I tried searching for it and can’t find it. My son’s girlfriend (hopefully, DIL someday) just graduated and is currently in the job market.
DC Darling
Don’t have the title but dang! I didn’t know there was a book that would’ve helped me! That sure would’ve been helpful.
a.k.
Check out the Federal Resume Guidebook for starters.
KK
And my size (2p) sold out in the 5 minutes between when I put it in my cart and when I tried to check out (delay due to work-related phone call). FML. There is never anything cute and on sale in my size. Its even sold out in my size at full price in most colors (i.e. all the good ones). I bought one in lava red… hope its not too neon bright.
r
Story of my life. I can never find anything on sale in small sizes.
Senior Attorney
I have the lava red and it is bright but not neon bright. Just a nice happy red!
KK
yay! Now I feel better. I have been searching forever for colorful pencil skirts in my size. (“the skirt” has not been avail in my size in any color except black and sometimes a royal-ish blue for almost a year– sooo envious of the color selection in non-petite sizes).
Monday
I have a random question for someone who understands Manhattan! I probably never will!
I’ve just watched my first few episodes of Gossip Girl (1st season) and am wondering how exaggerated the wealth and decadence are. Do private school kids there really get driven around by personal chauffeurs, live in 5-star hotels indefinitely, throw their own black-tie parties NBD, have endless couture wardrobes…? I know TV can be a caricature but am wondering how much truth there is to what I am seeing?
At first I thought “I’ve never met anyone who grew up in elite Manhattan, so what do I know?” But then I realized that in fact I have met 2 such people–and had blocked them from my memory because they were so unpleasant. I went to college in an elite private setting, and these 2 kids I remember would do things like leave jam smeared across the cupboards/counter because they had never had to clean up after themselves. One of them told me “my application here was rejected, but my Dad called the admissions office and asked how much money he would have to give to get me in.” Evidently that worked. The other told me that he really didn’t need to be in college at all because he was just going to work for his father on Wall Street regardless.
If Gossip Girl is fairly realistic, that doesn’t improve my opinion of these kids, but it does give me some perspective. Did I go to college with Blair and Nate? Any insight or experience?
AIMS
I have never watched Gossip Girl, so I can’t speak to it specifically, but there are some pretty decadent teens in our city. But think of it as sort of the 1% of the 1%. In other words, not every kid in a Manhattan private school will be like that. But some kids definitely have access to things that sound similar to what you describe on the show.
qwerty
I grew up in nyc and, while i wasn’t privileged in any of those ways (not even close), i know a few people who did attend elite UES private schools. they didn’t live the decadent lifestyle by any means, but i have a feeling they wouldn’t be alarmed or surprised by elements of that lifestyle the way the rest of us would be. it was accessible, and therefore, normalized for them.
momentsofabsurdity
Yes and no. I have friends and relatives who attended schools like Calhoun, Nightingale Bamford (what Constance Billard is based on), UNIS, Horace Mann, Dalton, etc. (I went to public school but went to a private college). I would say most of the kids came from plenty of money (tuition at a lot of those schools exceeds $40K/yr) but were also generally down to earth and didn’t “live like it” — ie, they were upper upper middle class, usually with parents who worked in finance or Big Law, etc. One thing I definitely noticed was that kids who grew up in the city and went to elite schools had a lot more “experience” when it came to drinking, bars, fake IDs, and drugs (except for pot) when they came to college. In high school, we might go to a party at a friend’s house whose parents were out of town and get an older brother to buy us a case of Natty, but I have plenty of friends from Manhattan who were hitting the bars for martinis every Tuesday in high school.
I think where I did see that people acted the way you described was when people came from generations of money. There was a reality show on Bravo based on Gossip Girl called NYC Prep a few years back and I remember one of the characters acting that way – he was the grandson of a billionaire and definitely acted that way.
Anon
“I think where I did see that people acted the way you described was when people came from generations of money.”
I would like to qualify this that, where i’ve seen this to be true, it is because there are generations of money plus a complete failure on the part of those generations to teach the newest generation that gazillions of dollars does not equal an unqualified right to act like a spoiled, entitled buffoon. Some of the hardest working, most pleasant to be around, and kindest people I know also happen to have the kind of money/background that drops jaws, but they were, to borrow that great old southern expression, “raised right”.
momentsofabsurdity
Yes, that’s totally fair. I have friends like that as well – who you’d never know they were OMGWTF-rich because they were so down to earth, driven and low key. A lot of it is how you are raised and what your parents teach you. I have a friend who’s the granddaughter of the founder of major, major tech company — but she went to public school, had a normal-sized allowance, etc, and is now a lovely, well functioning adult with plenty of cash but also a great work ethic and drive to help others. So a lot of it does come down to how you’re raised, you’re right.
DC Law
This. I also have several friends who attended Dalton, Sacred Heart, etc and they are all children of wealthy but hardworking businesspeople and lawyers, so they were brought up with some sense that their educations cost a ton and they didn’t get chauffeurs, fancy parties, spending money, etc the way the kids do on Gossip Girl. Of course, there were definitely a few heiresses and true socialites among them, but those were not the norm.
AIMS
As far as the drinking/”experience,” I think maybe that’s just true of city kids generally. Even if you don’t yourself indulge, you see others who do and you just have more opportunities to do so. I went to public school and my classmates & I would go to bars with some regularity. Although I must say we were surprisingly responsible about it!
And definitely agree that most kids – regardless of where they went to school – were and are perfectly normal, hard working, pleasant people.
Kanye East
There are some who live the Blair Waldorf lifestyle.
But I assure you, unlike on television, you can’t get past their doorman and up into the apartment unannounced with such regularity.
Monday
Interesting responses! Thanks all.
I just thought I’d add that there are PLENTY of ways for high school kids to get in trouble. Islands off the Maine coast? Two words: No Cops. There wasn’t a ton of money in my childhood milieu, but modest definitely =/= innocent.
It’s interesting to look at how means intersect with motives, not only in terms of substance use but also materialism, cattiness etc.
KLG
As a recent transplant to a small town (from a lifetime in the wealthy suburbs of DC) I am actually beginning to wonder if materialism, cattiness, etc. has more to do with how you are raised than how much money your family has. There are a lot of people around here who are poor (as in their children qualify for free/reduced lunch at school). But there are still some things that their kids HAVE to have even if it means everything else is bought at a thrift store/yard sale/etc. Acrylic nails, certain shoes, etc. and those girls are every bit as catty to each other as I remember the rich girls from my upbringing being.
KK
@KLG- I think what you’re describing is more of a class difference. I currently live in the wealthy DC burbs. The wealthy are just more subtle about their materialism and judgment. In fact, they will judge you for being openly catty. That is to be done behind close doors. The poor haven’t learned that trick- not saying the particular group you describe is less materialistic, but I don’t think they’re more so, they just don’t know it’s “low class” of them to be so open about it. It’s like the difference between Gwyneth Paltrow or Ivanka Trump and the Real Housewives.
I think DC is more about academic snobbery though. You’re more likely to be judged for your lack of a graduate degree than for your shoes.
KK
Interesting. I grew up in a pretty small, middle class town and we smoked pot in high school and drank alcohol (not really at bars- too small of a town to pull that off unless you knew the bartender/owner). I distinctly remember being surprised at college (in a different state) by the kids who were from wealthier areas and had a lot more experience in the “harder” drugs- coke, rx pills, etc. At the time, I thought it was just about that state. But in law school (home state), I encountered a lot of kids who went to the ritzier private schools in my area and it seemed their high school experience was more like that of the college kids. So I have concluded it was more money that geography, though maybe a bit of both. Mo money, mo problems, as they say.
Always a NYer
That’s such a good point, and something that’s always peeved me. No way would Vanessa ever be able to get up to the van der Bass apartment and certainly not the Waldorf penthouse. A friend of my mom’s lives in a doorman building in Yorkville and we needed to wait for her to confirm we were her guest. Only then were we allowed into the elevator. But that’s artistic liberty for you ;)
nona
Exactly. How could all the drama happen if you didn’t have surprise guests and sneaky eavesdroppers?
Jules
No experience — Midwest and middle-class, here — but I had what turned out to be a very boyfriend in law school who went to Horace Mann. Now I’m thinking that that explains a lot.
Anna
Love the yellow! The shade is perfect.
Anna
http://member.ly/lucid-box
V
NEW TWIST ON HOSE QUESTION: I have nothing against ditching hose / tights in warm weather, but my feet are starting to have issues with it. Perfectly comfy shoes are tearing up my feet when going bare-legged in them. I have been trying those no-show footie things, but keep buying ones that show. And I’ve been trying bizarre things to keep them from showing — hooking them under the big toe and little toe, which seems to defeat the purpose. I am wanting to think there is a good no-show footie out there somewhere, but I may just return to hose (THANK YOU, Kate Middleton!) to save my feet this summer. Any thoughts?
CW
This is one of the primary reasons why I wear hose year-round – shoes are so much easier to wear! I have the same issue with the no-show footie things. Perhaps you should try buying them in a size smaller than your normal foot size? I haven’t tried this yet, but would love to hear other suggestions!
TCFKAG
I wear nude hose all summer because I find leather closed-toed shoes to be unbearable without them. Also, air conditioning. If you by the ultra-sheer type that really match your skin tone, I think you’re fine.
I’ve never found a footie thing that actually (a) stayed on but (b) was covered by the shoe. So….other people’s opinions might differ (obviously they do) but I don’t think summer means no hose if you don’t want it to.
Anne Shirley
I just let the edges of the no-show footies hang out. It’s not like they’re pubic hair at an office pool party after all.
Anon
Ha!
E.
Hue makes good no-show footies that have a silicone pad on the heel so they stay put. Having said that, I really think the only solution to torn-up feet is to buy expensive shoes with soft leather inner linings, or wear pantyhose. It’s impossible to have footies that are truly, completely no-show, because they have to come up to the top of the shoe line in order to prevent it from rubbing on your skin.
Senior Attorney
I use Body Glide, which is an anti-chafing stick made for runners, on my bare feet inside my shoes. Works well for me!
Sydney Bristow
Where can you buy Body Glide? I tried to look for it atTarget, but maybe I was just looking in the wrong sections (or it could be because the Target I went to is awful).
CW
Amazon
phillygirlruns
i’ve never seen body glide at target – i got mine at a running specialty store, but it wouldn’t surprise me if larger sporting goods stores (d ck’s and the like) carried it as well.
E.
Sporting goods stores or online (Amazon has it).
Sydney Bristow
Thanks all!
Senior Attorney
I get it at drugstore dot com.
rosielo
Ha, I needed Body Glide yesterday for a 5k race, but used deoderant instead… and it worked like a charm!
jcb
I gave up on the footies. I just put on preventative band-aids in the morning. Wear a shoe for 5 minutes around the house and you’ll figure out which parts will be rubbing you raw by noon, apply band-aids to those parts, and you’re all set. Takes 30 seconds.
hak
I drew the line at >2 bandaids per foot though. Occasional bandaids are OK, but it was a bit much for me as a seasonal way of life.
MaggieLizer
You guise, I started my new job this week and I absolutely love it! The environment is entirely different than I’m used to. We come in around 9:30, take however long we need for lunch, go to the gym either around lunch or mid-afternoon, and people start leaving at 5:30. We have a lot of work coming in over the next few weeks so I know it’ll be a mad house then, but that fits pretty well with my personality. I prefer the bursts of intense work followed by short periods of calm. I didn’t realize practice could be this good.
A word of advice and caution for laterals – please get an offer letter with no/minimal contingencies and get it in writing that you’ve cleared conflicts before you give your notice. I had a very rough first day here because a partner in another office decided at 5 pm on my last day that he wanted a waiver letter for a conflict that isn’t a conflict, and my former client refused to give a waiver because there isn’t a conflict. I showed up Monday and the new firm said I might not have a job. The managing partner of my office went to bat for me and screamed a lot and the other partner dropped it, but it was a very stressful way to start a new job. I was lucky, but it could’ve been really bad. So please be smarter than I was!
Kontraktor
Congrats!!!! I dream of a job situation like this where people are very matter of fact- if there is work to be done, people work, if it’s quieter, it isn’t a big deal and there is more freedom with the schedule. Sighs wistfully. I hope one day this will happen for me too.
Nonny
I think I am there too. I may have found the Holy Grail of law firms – larger than my previous one so there is adequate support, word processing, interesting work, etc., but small enough that people are reasonable about their lives. Congrats, MaggieLizer, and hallelujah.
Anonymous
Where, where did you find such a place?
I love the work aspect of my job, but not the politics or the volume of work. I am fully willing to take a substantial pay cut if I can find a place with good people who are at least as committed to their non-work lives as their work.
MOlaw
Congrats! I think I’ve found a similar place, even though I’m only an SA. I have seen several attorneys grant themselves casual Thursdays because they “just didn’t feel like it” that day. No one is here past 6 unless there is actually important work to do. People with kids will leave in the middle of the day to do something with their kids. My secretary is taking every Friday off for a while because she bakes wedding cakes on the side for goodness sakes! It’s amazing!
CPA
Have any other CPAs signed up for the CGMA? I signed up in January, but I’m not sure if I want to pay for the designation when I renew my AICPA membership this month. I know there has been some backlash against the designation, so I don’t want to waste my $$!
Misty
Does anyone have a fitbit? Any tips or recommendations? I’m using it as motivation to be more active. I have about 50 lbs to lose.
Fitbit
Yes! LOVE my fitbit. It really does encourage you to get moving more. I bought my husband one too and we compare our steps daily to motivate each other. I am also eyeing the new fitbit aria scale!
jlf
I have a fitbit as well as their wireless scale, but to be honest I really only pay attention to my sleep using the fitbit, and I just sort of glance at the steps taken/daily activity level stuff. I have had it since it launched a few years back, so some ofthe novelty has worn off, but I kind of feel like it never really made a difference in anything I do other than making me try to get the optimal amount of sleep. I have always just used it as a monitor of what I am already doing instead of a goad for better behavior, which is one of many reasons I am still just as fat as ever despite wearing it daily.
agal
I’d love to hear about this as well because I am thinking about getting a Nike+ fuel band which seems to be a similar concept … some people say the fitbit is better but I’m a total sucker for the looks of the fuel band …
DC Darling
I love superhero movies. Not just movies. Shows. Like, animated shows. Original animated batman? LOVE IT.
I wish I was a superhero. My parents said Tae Kwon Doe was the closest “Superhero Class” they could think of. So I have my black belt. But still.
DC Darling
Dang. Replied in the wrong place.
JessBee
I love my fitbit. I’ve had mine since Christmas, and it does help motivate me to walk a little more. There’s a shaming process, because it sucks to get to the end of an entire work day and see “2543.” Also, the customer service is really good. I had a problem with the charging station, and after trying to trouble shoot it, they just sent me a new one on them– even though mine had been a gift, so I couldn’t produce a receipt, etc. Very nice.
I’ve seen the Nike Fuelband, and one thing I know I like better about the Fitbit is that it is easily hidden. I wear it clipped to my bra everyday, and nobody’s the wiser. My husband wears his in the included belt clip, and he’s happy, too.
You probably already know this, but changing eating habits is usually a much more effective way to lose weight than just increased activity…so the Fitbit isn’t really a weight loss tool (although there is a food tracker and weight tracker on the website, I find that the food database is less complete than, say, FatSecret dot com). Having said that, increasing activity is a great thing in and of itself, and my Fitbit has subtly helped me do that! :)
Plan B
Yes, I’ve had a fitbit for a while also. I run regularly, so I wouldn’t say that it has encouraged me to move more. I do agree with the other posters about mainly using it to track my sleep, although if I find that I’m close to a step count, I’ll often walk around a little bit longer just to hit it!
AnonRequired
Let’s have Shameful Confession Friday.
Me: I loved Don’t be Tardy for the Wedding and would love to see Kim and Kroy have their own show. There. I said it. But I’d never tell my coworkers, lol.
DC Law
True confession: I have had the song “Call Me Maybe” stuck in my head all week. And I kind of like it.
TCFKAG
This alone made me appreciate Call Me Maybe so much more.
http://www.overthinkingit.com/2012/05/25/the-musical-talmud-call-me-maybe-by-carly-rae-jepsen-video/
Bunkster
I’m hooked on that song, too, mostly because of this video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eEWVwgDnuzE
JessC
OMG. Me too.
phillygirlruns
i just heard that song for the first time a week or two ago and it inspired an entire “crap pop music” playlist (which i’ve been listening to constantly). i have GOT to start paying more attention to pop music – i’m so sad i unwittingly deprived myself of that song for months.
In House Counsel
Care to share what else is on your crap pop playlist — am always looking for new music for the gym and “crap pop” recs would be welcome:)
Merabella
My Hubs confessed that he sings and dances to this song in the car… Now every time I hear it I picture that image in my head, and it makes me giggle uncontrollably.
January
That was definitely the theme song for a recent bachelorette party I attended. ;)
NOLA
Have you seen the Jimmy Fallon video version? Awesome.
KYC
didn’t you know call me maybe is really a song about the euro zone crisis?
http://www.theatlantic.com/business/archive/2012/06/call-me-maybe-explains-the-euro-crisis-seriously/258435/
TCFKAG
My shameful confession: I miss hot neighbor Wade. When HoD went on break, I was literally sad. And I’m WAY TOO INVESTED in whether zoe and wade are going to end up together. So I watch youtube videos of them.
Its really, really shameful.
Bunkster
Discovered last night that my sister-in-law didn’t see the finale so I watched it with her.
Anonymous NYer
haha amazing. I too miss wade. Luckily I saved the last ep on my dvr and I’ve watched about 3 times already since it aired…
TCFKAG
There are youtube videos where you can just watch the excerpts from the final episode that involved zoe and wade, without all that annoying wedding cr*p. I may or may not have watched those a few too many times.
“The lamb doesn’t care about your abs wade.” teehee.
Selia
I really liked the Twilight series…
E.
I’ll see your Twilight and raise you one – I really liked 50 Shades of Grey. Actually, embarrassingly, I like most smutty romance novels.
Former MidLevel
This is so funny – I’ve been feeling the need to confess my fashion sin all week. So here goes….I have worn flip-flops to work multiple times this week. It’s due to a toe injury (I have to put medicine on it multiple times a day) and no one notices in my frumpy, frumpy office. But still. Flip-flops. I am deeply ashamed.
Bunkster
I’m wearing yoga jeans and flip flops at work. Anything goes here. I’ve worn heels twice since I’ve been here and it was just odd. My flipflops are black with pink skull and crossbones.
Kontraktor
Once in ye oldene past as an intern, I wore knee-length capris to my relatively formal internship. I still have a guilt complex about it, even though all these years later I tell myself it was just because everything else was being cleaned and I was a youngling who didn’t know 100% better. Hangs head.
Francie Nolan
I read The Rock Star’s Daughter and The Believer’s Daughter from The Treadwell Academy Series, which is along the lines of the Sweet Valley High series and loved it so much I am anxiously awaiting the next book.
r
I just went to look this up and then downloaded it because it’s free for Kindle (the first book)… so thank you for your confession!
Fancie Nolan
That is why I picked the first one, too. I hope you enjoy!
JT
I spend my hour-plus bus commute reading trashy romance novels even though I know I could be doing billable work.
And (to add on to the comments above) I had “Call Me Maybe” stuck in my head for a week and liked the song so much I made a Pandora station for it, then listened to 1.5 hours of Taylor Swift, One Republic, and every other Jepsen song just waiting for them to get around to playing that one.
Blonde Lawyer
Attorneys or others that review e-discovery:
I’m at a small firm that does not currently have e-discovery software like summation or concordance. We are considering getting concordance but are also looking into some of the cloud hosting and reviewing options. I have experience with a Boston vendor that I like working with and do enjoy supporting local business.
However, a national vendor, Ricoh, contacted me with some very appealing options and I’m considering using them for a case that will require serious e-discovery expertise. I’m up on all the tech stuff and am basically the one teaching and moving the rest of the firm in that direction.
Has anyone used Ricoh before? Did they have good service? Competitive prices? No bait and switch tactics or hidden charges?
Let me know if you have comments on Ricoh specifically. Also, let me know how you feel about concordance vs. the cloud options. Thanks!
SF Bay Associate
Never used Ricoh. I hate Concordance in terms of a review tool – the UI and support are frustrating and slow. Also not a fan of Stratify, but it’s ok. Relativity is by far my favorite… much easier to use, more powerful search and batching capabilities, and stable. I’m not sure if Relativity is an overlay on Concordance though – our Relativity is definitely not in the cloud.
TCFKAG
I believe Relativity has both a cloud and a non-cloud program.
I have used Concordance, Relativity, and Summation (and maybe one other). While Relativity works okay, I think it depends on your server strength, for a small firm a cloud option might be better since you just don’t have the server capabilities. I also believe there is a newer concordance program that is better.
Never used Ricoh though.
Eleanor
Is there a way to make avocados ripen faster? I want to use them in a salad I’m bringing to a cookout tomorrow, but I’m buying them today and they’re always underripe at the grocery store. I seem to remember you can make tomatoes ripen faster by putting them in a paper bag; is there something like this for avocados?
Also, why is it “tomatoes” but not “avocadoes”? Am I spelling one of them wrong?
CW
The same thing works for avocados. Also, I think if you put them in an oven (not turned on), it’ll help as well.
Bunkster
Apparently, you can put them in a paper bag with ripe bananas or apples:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Avocado
Equity's Darling
This totally works. I find ripe bananas with a ton of brown spots more effective.
anon
Side note – I believe this works because bananas (well, most fruit, but maybe bananas especially) off-gas ethylene while they ripen, and the presence of ethylene will cause nearby fruit to ripen as well. May not apply to all fruit, but applies to many.
AIMS
Paper bag, in a dark place, and add another vegetable like a tomato to the mix. Something about the combo makes it ripen faster.
But usually you can find one or two soft avocados in the mix. If your store sells “guacamole sets” (avocado, chili pepper, tomato, etc., altogether) those are usually softer and ready to use. Trader Joe’s has these – not sure if you have one near you.
Jennifer
You’re spelling them both right. Avocado and tomato probably have different etymologies. Anywho, paper bag works for avocados.
AnotherLadyLawyer
Paper bag works for avocados too! But not sure if it works *that* fast. Hopefully your grocery store has squishy ones!
Eleanor
Thank you all! I will squeeze all the avocados, hope for some ripe-ish ones, and paper bag them with a tomato.
Mouse
Rant on – I’m replacing a beloved administrator who left for medical reasons. Front desk person was hired by beloved administrator. Front desk person has long history of ‘flexibility’ in her hours and duties – i.e., beloved administrator never actually held her to the job description. Now I’m tasked with getting her up to speed in a gentle-yet-firm way so that she actually does what we’re paying her for, when we are open for business. But I can’t do this because she’s calling in all of her PTO at random times, which makes it even more difficult to rely upon her to get her work done in a timely fashion (which has been a long-term complaint about her). I’m ending up doing her job, as well as learning & doing my own. And yes, this rant is because she’s out “sick” today, which is our first beautiful sunny Friday in a while, and I am going to have to scramble to get critical things done for Monday as soon as my conference call ends, and will probably have to stay late on this beautiful sunny day. And it’s supposed to rain tomorrow. Sigh. Rant off.
anonz
I think you need to ditch gentle but firm and start tough and firm.
NOLA
I had to have a come to Jesus talk with one of my staff in the fall. She had used half of her allotted 20 days of vacation two months into the fiscal year because of random calling in sick. She felt like she was “owed” this time, so what did it matter. She was being picked on, etc. etc. I had to sit her down and explain to her the difference between planned and unplanned time off in terms of its effect on her colleagues and her productivity.
Parenting?
Don’t you think that if this is something your boss has to explain to you that your parents didn’t do a very good job?
NOLA
Oh gosh, she’s 57 years old and wasn’t raised in this country. Who knows?
Mouse
Gentle, because we (including the big boss) don’t want her to be upset and run to HR that we are being mean to her, which she has done in the past. Firm, because we all (as far as I can tell, including the big boss) want her to either shape up or ship out. It’s how much hair I tear out in the meanwhile…
But seriously, beloved administrator really wasn’t doing her any favors in the long-term. It’s already been a rude shock for her to be told she needs to show up on time, and unless she turns it around, she will really have a hard time finding a comparable job elsewhere.
Cheap Good Shoes Alert
Ladies,
I picked up these shoes at a Kohl’s in an emergency, and now I’ve had them for 5 months and wear them at least one day a week. They are so comfortable and are barely beginning to show signs of wear, and I walk probably 6 blocks a day in them:
Sam & Libby Elliance (they are $19.99 or $24.99 at 6pm)
http://www.6pm.com/sam-libby-women-heels/CK_XARC41wFSAs8IwAEB4gIEGAECCg.zso
Merabella
This skirt has sent me into a fashion spiral. I’ve decided that I want to make this dress now.
http://www.simplesimonandco.com/2012/06/3-seam-caftan-tutorial.html
Cali CPA
I have this skirt in light blue in 2P and I LOVE it. I wore it twice in the first two weeks that I owned it.
Cali CPA
Oh, and I wear a 0p in the regular skirt, so I sized up for this one.
MA
CaliCPA, it sounds like we are similar sizes (?). I’m looking for something that doesn’t make my 5’0, 100# frame look like I’m from a Frosted Mini-Wheats commercial. Think the 0P/2P would work for me, too?
a lawyer
I bought the 0 in this skirt in khaki and love it. I want a skirt that hits at the top of my knee, not a few inches above, so bear that in mind. I’m 5 feet even as well, and about 95 pounds.