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Coffee Break: Tessie Pump

Ivanka Trump Tessie Pump | CorporetteOne for the money, two for the show, three to get ready, now go cat go… hey, Elvis was on to something with his blue suede shoes. As one commenter pointed out, I have an odd love for cutouts with flats — but I also like them in heels. These simple pumps (with a relatively low 2.75″ heel) look perfect. They're available in blue suede, as well as black and tan leather, for $135. Ivanka Trump Tessie Pump Here's a lower-priced option (and one more with different color choices). (L-6)

Sales of note for 12.5

And some of our latest threadjacks here at Corporette (reader questions and commentary) — see more here!

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124 Comments

  1. I need advice on how to not take things personally/reframe conversations. Example: Boss says, “We still have a lot to do.” I hear “You are not doing enough.” Please assume, for these purposes, that I am doing “enough” by all objective measures (including my boss’s), and this is more of an issue about how I internalize things than a performance issue. TIA.

    1. Honestly? Hear it again. And again. Keep getting criticism. Working with very abrasive, even abusive clients was the only thing that got me over that.

    3. Sometimes, I need to rationalize with myself. Admitting that you are hearing “We still have a lot to do” as “You are not doing enough”, acknowledging it, and then going “Self, that’s not what Boss meant. Here are the things you are doing and here is the expectation of what you will do and those are the same thing.”

      I’ve also decided to try to take people more at face value, in general, because I have found that issue extends beyond work for me. So if a friend says “I’ve had a really long week, I can’t make dinner tonight”, I’ve decided to accept that it means that my friend is tired. Yes, it could mean that she doesn’t like me and is trying to avoid me, but until it becomes a recurring issue, I’m going to make myself stop reading into it.

    4. Say it outloud, to the person who just said it to you, in the reframed way: “I agree. I mean, I’ve done all I can but clearly a lot of work remains to be done.”

      Sometimes I pretend I’m my husband, who almost never apologizes for anything, almost ever, and just blames things on Things Happen. I do that. “yeah, it totally happened. So, what are the next steps?” Move on.

      If you’re in the mood/time/money for therapy, focus on Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. There’s a lot of data behind it, actually.

    5. It’s work. No one gives a f**k about your feelings. If you sucked, your boss would say “you suck, get out.” Would a man worry about this?

      1. Yes, a man might. Men are human too. I agree with the rest of your comment in that OP needs to grow a thicker skin but I hate the false “would a man do it” argument , especially because it suggests men are automatically somehow superior at work.

  3. I was on BART a few days ago and saw a woman wearing the standard Bay Area Winter Uniform: olive utility jacket, skinny jeans, tall boots, infinity scarf. This is the outfit that’s looked fresh and current and on-trend for a long time. And all of sudden, this outfit just looked tired to me – a little out of date, no longer on trend, maybe a little boring. It made me wonder if we are finally seeing the beginning of the end of the skinny jean/boot combo. I still vividly remember the time in the mid-9os when all of a sudden, jeans went to boot-cuts instead of straight leg, and all of a sudden, the old straight-leg jeans looked really outdated.

    I’m not the most fashion-forward person, but my reaction to her (perfectly cute!) outfit did make me wonder if we are on the cusp of a fashion transition. Have any of you had a similar observation this winter?

    1. It has to be over because I got my first-ever infinity scarf for my birthday this year.

      [I think they are great, but when the trend gets to the turning-45 minivan driver, it is perhaps time for the cool kids to move on to the Next Big Thing.]

      1. Ha! I was just thinking that it was time to buy some boots when I saw this woman and had this emphatic reaction.

      2. hahaha….I also find that as soon as *I* start picking up trends, they’re done.

        See, side bangs, boots and skinny jeans, that drapey open cardigan thing and yoga pants, coach…

    2. I haven’t work skinny jeans with tall boots in nearly 3 years; it looks dated to me too. Instead I’ll wear skinny jeans with moto boots, ankle boots, sneakers, heels, or flats or flared leg.

      1. I saw a woman with skinny ankle pants and heels right next to her and it looked so much fresher.

          1. And 1978! (When we weren’t wearing big cuffs and creepers/doc martens or of whatever the thrift store had. Unless it was New Romantic night. )

    3. Yeah, I think the look is on its way out.

      When I was in paris about a month ago, everyone was wearing Chelsea boots, with straight leg jeans (cut relatively tight, just not skinny at the ankle), with the jeans cuffed and boxier tops/jackets. I suspect that’ where things will move. I also saw a lot of military style coming back, along wit just generally a more 90s style vibe.

      This shape of jacket was super common:.
      http://www.soiakyo.com/us/en/masha-camel-boxy-wool-jacket-for-women

      I bought myself a pair of Chelsea boots and I have been loving them.

      Edit: Cocoon jackets! That’s what they’re called.

    4. Skinny jeans tucked into tall boots is my uniform in these cold snowy months. I’ve tried wearing more ankle-ish boots but they just don’t look good on me. Maybe it’s because I’m only 5’0″ and it feels like they make my legs look stumpy? And sometimes, the boots are too wide and it just doesn’t look right.

      When skinny jeans first came out, I hated them and didn’t think I’d ever wear them. Now, I choose them the majority of the time over my boot cut pants.

      I’m a child of the 80s so going from folding my jeans to regular straight/boot cut pants was the last big fashion change I remember. I’m curious to see what the next big style evolution will be.

    5. Skinny jeans and tall boots has been out for at least a season or two. Ankle boots are definitely much more “in fashion” right now. That being said, there’s a certain timelessness to a classic riding boot, so its never going to be completely out. There’s also a certain amount of practicality to a tall boot.

    6. What’s everyone’s replacement for infinity scarves and scarves in general? I’m sick of mine.

      1. I just made a sort of hybrid cowl/shawl – if you click through to my blog there are pictures, otherwise google ‘Starshower cowl’. For me it fills that gap without being same-old, same-old.

    7. I will keep wearing this formula because it’s functional (warm and layered) and comfortable. I can walk all day in my boots; heels not so much. Ankle boots are swell, but they aren’t as warm or water proof as knee-high boots.

      2. For what it’s worth, there is no sign that this look is at all “out” in my city (and it was omnipresent when I was in Greece a few months ago).

    8. Yay! I like these pump’s, but NOT for work!

      I love skinny jean’s also, but I need to loose 4 pounds in the tuchus before mine fit properly and I do NOT want to upsize to have a nice fit. FOOEY! Peeople who look good must work hard to look good b/c it does NOT come naturaly for most of us. I want to have nice clothe’s, but ONLEY if they fit right.

      I have billed 20 hours today since comeing in at 10. Myrna’s brother said he wants to come over, but I do NOT want him in m apartement without Myrna. Beside’s the manageing partner’s brother want’s me to come over for dinner–he said he is cookeing up a Brisket! I love Brisket, but who knows what kind of a schlubby cook he is. I prefer Grandma Trudy’s Brisket. Yay Grandma Trudy!

    9. Damn, I’ve been thinking that skinny jeans and boots looks dated but I’ve been struggling with a good alternative in the winter. I live somewhere cold and midwestern and am in my mid-30s. I struggle with wearing ankle boots because I feel like I freeze. Any good style blogs for people for casual dress ideas in cold climate?

      1. I think sundance is happening/coming up. Just google around to see what the stars are wearing.

    10. I get a lot of snow where I am, is there any sort of practical alternative to knee high boots an skinnies? Ankle boots/chelsea boots all let snow in. I don’t like wet cold ankles and feet.

      1. I don’t think you’ll go wrong with actual snow boots. The LL Bean snow boots are hugely popular in NYC and I can attest to their practicality in our most recent blizzard.

  4. OOPS, this was meant for Kelly K above.

    I am going to suggest a book that others may think is hokey, but it helped me – The Four Agreements, by Don Miguel Ruiz. That plus therapy really helped me understand that most things aren’t about me, in fact almost none of them are and that taking things personally was a huge hindrance in my life and progress. This of course assumes that you are not a terrible, lazy, worthless person – I am not and I doubt that you are either.

    It sounds like you might have some low self-esteem (I did too) or impostor syndrome or just be super critical of yourself. Welcome to my old world. I know everyone recommends therapy on here, but it truly did help me.

  5. I’ve been commuting in Hunters plus fleece wellie socks for the past few years, but I think it’s time for me to get some proper snow boots, and I’d love some advice. I have poor circulation and my feet get very cold, so warmth is an important factor for me, especially because I walk around a lot (I live in NYC). They don’t need to be Midwest, subzero-temperature-proof, though (see: live in NYC). Also ideally I would want something as waterproof as my Hunters. And finally — and this is probably the hardest criteria when combined with the others — I want to wear them commuting into my more-formal-side-of-business-casual BigLaw office, so I’m looking for something that doesn’t look particularly childish. We do have a lot of leeway in terms of what we wear into the office (and I’ll change into pumps as soon as I’m at my desk), but I already look super young for my age so I’m hesitant to get something like, for example, the Sorel Joan of Arctic boots (which I hear are very warm). Any suggestions? It may be that I can’t find this all in one pair of boots, and I’ll have to get a warm/waterproof pair for running around on the weekend, and then find something less warm but slightly more adult-looking to wear into the office… but it would be great if I can find the perfect combination!! TIA :)

    1. A pair of LaCanadienne may work. Or any waterproof short boot + smartwool socks. In NYC, I think that you also want something that’s good on ice, which many waterproof boots aren’t.

      But I think that Hunters read (now, maybe not true 10 years ago) young and trendy.

      1. Thanks for the suggestion! And re: the Hunters, exactly. I think they’re a little too young.

    4. La Canadienne or Aquatalia (Italy’s waterproof answer to La Canadienne). Both have many styles that are waterproof, snow-proof, stylish (and possibly expensive). I drool over some of them at times. You can get some on closeout at zappos, amazon, 6pm, etc. I got a $300 La Canadienne pair for $29.99 at amazon a few years ago – love them still.

    5. You should also check out Ugg specifically the Ugg Elsa, tall boot, leather and waterproof. I saw them instore and think they might be fleece or shearling lined, check to be sure. I think the black would work better for an office. Unless you need to be very formal I think you could wear them commuting and all day at work.
      Check out boots by Blondo, another Canadian brand, they have some in leather with shearling lining. You might find something you like

    6. In a totally different direction, I commute in the Dublin River boot, which is the “cheaper” version of the super pricey Dubarry Galway boot. It definitely has an equestrian look, but is completely waterproof, warm, and has a nice fit. I get a lot of compliments on them when I commute, but then I also wear them on the weekends with jeans. I realize it’s not for everyone, style-wise (and, yes, they are mainly intended for the barn, although so are Wellies), but just wanted to throw it out there as an alternative. :)
      They do make a fleece lined version as well.
      https://www.smartpakequine.com/dublin-river-boot-5450p

  6. Do you all think that the outfits featured on The Classy Cubicle are all that work appropriate/things you could wear to work on a regular basis? Her style is beautiful, but I can’t imagine going into work dressed like that, and I’ve worked in offices that range from the more casual end of business casual through suit every day kind of stuff.

    1. I feel like they are more looks that I see in magazines. The outfits as a whole don’t seem like they would work in real-life, but there may be components of them that would work.

    2. I love her style. I don’t think everything she wears is ideal for work, at least not for me, and I don’t work in a super conservative office. She’s very fashion forward so some stuff strikes me as a bit too trendy for me. I don’t think her style would be good at a conservative workplace. A lot of the outfits though would be great for slightly less conservative workplaces, either as is or with a few minor edits.

    3. No, absolutely not. A fur vest? To work? No. But I use her color schemes and general shapes and combinations for great ideas. There was one where she paired emerald with mint – would never have thought of that, but I love it, and it works really well.

        1. Agreed, Sheepie. I’m wearing one in my office right now. I also think they add the fresh element discussed above to a skinny jeans look.

    5. Another no from me. I use her for color/shape inspiration and mostly for my casual wardrobe. Honestly, sometimes I see her outfits and wonder if her choices lead her to be taken less seriously in an investment banking setting where all the guys are in pinstripes.

    6. I read somewhere that she quit her “cubicle” job and now blogs full-time. IMO, her outfit choices now lean more creative and less corporate.

  7. Where can I get good suits that are almost-plus-sized? I didn’t have good luck last time I went looking at the usual places like Banana. I’m like a size 14+ and carry my weight around my middle.

    1. Pre-kids, I was that size and had luck with Talbots and Ann Taylor suiting. I’d also suggest going up to a 14W pencil skirt – my hips just weren’t going to fit into a regular 14 because it was cut too narrow. The little bit of “give” in the 14W size was perfect for me.

      1. Thanks! I was thinking something with a little stretch would be nice, but I don’t know if suits are made with stretch.

        1. I’d try the Talbots seasonless wool suiting, then. The pencil skirts had a tiny bit of stretch built in, and (at least when I bought them a few years ago) were well-made, nicely lined, and held up well.

    3. I’m almost exactly the same shape as you and recently have gotten all of my suiting separates at the Limited. I wore my pencil skirt from the Limited yesterday with a coordinating jacket and two partners commented with some surprise that I “looked like a lawyer,” which I found somewhat insulting (I wear the same combo with other pencil skirts fairly frequently, so I don’t know why the skirt from the Limited made such a difference, but apparently it did).

      1. That sounds perfect. Did you get a certain style or cut that worked so well?

  8. What would you ladies wear to a self-described “formal (black tie optional)” wedding? It’s in Chicago if that helps for reference.

    Does that mean you can wear a long dress or that you really should wear a long dress?

    I was thinking this might be a nice opportunity to try out something from rent the runway.

    1. You can get away with a long dress or a short dress. But if you want to do something different, rent a long dress, because most other dress codes prefer short dresses, IMHO.

    2. I’d rent a long dress, because how often do you get to wear something formal and fabulous? But you should feel free to wear something short if that’s not your thing, as there will definitely be a mix of both.

    3. My sympathies, I hate those fake dress codes! My thoughts are either its black tie or its not. I think there will be both lengths, probably more short dresses because that’s what most people have. So if you were buying I would say a great cocktail dress since you can probably get more use out of it. But if you want to do rent the runway, thats a great way to try long!

      Also a little plug for rent the runway- I rented for new years but the dress I had ordered returned to them unwearable. They offered me any dress at any price, but because it was two days before new years it was pretty picked over. I opted for a refund, which the processed immediately, and filled out a survey that between my last two dresses and what I heard from friends, it seems like their stock has been returned unwearable somewhat often.

      About a week later I had a package on my door step- RtR sent me a box of godiva chocolates and an apology note. It really made me feel like they had listened to me.

    4. Thanks ladies! I think this will be a perfect time for sure to try out a long dress!

  9. OMG help. I received an invitation to an evening wedding in the south in the early spring, ceremony/reception at one venue (not church). The dress code is …. regal casual. REGAL casual. Regal CASUAL.

    What does it MEAN?!

          2. Don’t be so elitist. Not everybody can afford separate tiaras for work and non-work.

        2. Right, but something you would wear to work = on the casual side for a wedding. So it totally works.

      1. If it is regal, the cape has to be purple, like Rick Wakeman used to wear on stage. Please don’t let me be the only one old enough to remember those days!

    5. I think that means fur-trimmed cloak over jeans, and ideally a crown. A tiara could work too, if that’s all you have.

    6. Carry a scepter ?

      Good grief. I am so annoyed when I get invitations like this. I was invited to a wedding last fall where the bridge requested that the guests either wear black or orange. Neither look very good on me. I RSVP’d my regrets.

    8. Please report back after the wedding. Regal casual? I have no idea!

    9. This is why I’m very specific with dress codes on my party invitations.

      “For women, formal blue dresses between the shades of cerulean and turquoise only, for men, tuxedos with cummerbunds in the same shade. Diamond earrings for both, either in ears, eyebrows, or noses.”

      “Jeans, teeshirts in any color or style, butterfly wings.”

      “Trench coats and shoes. Nothing else.”

      2. Dress code number 2 actually fits in pretty well with what people will be wearing to the fireworks show following my wedding (we’re getting married on the 4th of July). Not because that is what I’m requesting but because it is a public event and people in my hometown are whimsical hippies.

    10. This feels like the bride wants everyone to look “classy” so her photos will be picture-perfect and thus hopes that when she says “regal” people will take the hint to dress the way she wants- i.e. to her tastes.

      1. I think the opposite. The bride wants people to wear whatever they want and makes them happy, but just did a disastrous job explaining that in words.

        1. Brides who want people to wear whatever they wont dont tell people weird dress codes. Almost no invitations should have a dress code. The venn diagram of bridezillas and weird dress codes is a circle.

          2. What do you mean really? I think its really stupid. But what it means is that the bride is having a casual wedding, but wants people to dress up for it so the pictures look nice. otherwise it would just say “casual”

    11. Bring and orb and scepter? Wear a purple ermine trimmed robe?

      What I would actually do is find a solid colored dress, and buy a fascinator on Etsy. Inspiration from Princess Beatrice and Eugenie at the royal wedding.

    12. Do they have a wedding website that might offer examples of what that means? If the couple is going to pick a ridiculous fake dress code they should at least provide guests with some examples or guidelines.

    13. I googled this and the search produced precisely NOTHING!. Poor you. It is worth doing a google search just to look at the images which are hilarious if one imagines wearing most of them to this affair.

      I did come across a website where another poor soul was seeking help defining “beach casual cocktail attire” as a wedding dress code.

      Honestly – what is WITH people? My sympathies to you. Please do report back on this interesting event.

      1. I googled it and got dirty craigslist postings

        *hate* when people make up dress codes

    14. The couple who invited you are assh*les and you don’t have to go. That is how I would interpret it.

  11. So, I’ve sold some things to Thredup before, and have had great success thus far. I have a coupon and a credit, and I thought that perhaps I should look at their designer pieces to see if I can save up for something timeless and classic that I would not otherwise be able to afford.

    Some of the things I’m considering: Burberry trench coat (about $200-300 second-hand); anything cashmere (what brands should I be considering for sweaters that are going to be high-quality and timeless?); wool car coat (wouldn’t have any idea what brands to consider)

    What are some of the pieces you would invest in?

    2. A Burberry trench will last forever. Mine is nearing 25 and looks great. I suggest going into a store and trying on the classic cut, so you get the correct size— you need to be able to fit a suit jacket under the coat. Stick with the trad style in full length.

    3. Oh! What a great idea! I had totally forgotten about DVF.

      Thanks for the tip for trying on a trench, too–I probably wouldn’t have done that (and would have been sad).

      Trouble with thredup, is that I’ll need to have a pot of money sitting ready to purchase, since items come and go pretty quickly. I’m not sure if I can create alerts for items, or not.

      1. I’ll add—try the trench on, find your size and then sock the money away until the right one comes along. It’ll be worth it, and you’ll know the deal when you see it. A friend just told me they pop up on ebay, too—she wanted to look at the label and the buckles, etc. of mine, so she could compare it one she was looking at.
        Enjoy the hunt and whatever you wind up with!

  12. Any advice on introverts who have successfully worked in management positions? I am considering going for a promotion, but worry that my slow-to-warm-up to others personality is a hindrance.

    1. No advice; I’m interested to hear what others have to say though. I think you should go for the promotion regardless. You won’t know if your personality will hinder your efforts unless you try. You may be pleasantly surprised.

    2. Not me personally, but my husband is the biggest introvert that I’ve ever met and also an amazing manager (so say his employees and superiors, at least). So it can be done. I would absolutely go for it because you never know unless you try. Maybe you’ll be managing a team of introverts and they’re terrified of having some extrovert completing overwhelming them.

    3. I’m a super introvert and have been surprised to find that I enjoy managing people and actually think I’m good at it. There is hope! A key for me has been to look at the strengths of introversion as well as just its problems (I’m not outgoing, I don’t immediately make people feel comfortable/liked, I need to do a lot of work on my own–all true).

      Introverts are generally good listeners and very perceptive. They also think things through before making decisions or even responding to questions. They give people their space because that’s how they wish to be treated too. They tend to move slowly but methodically. I’m sure it varies by field, but in my career these have ended up being major pluses for me as a supervisor. When people give positive feedback about my management style, it tends to be along these lines. I also always make a point of praising the extraverted-type work that my colleagues do to pick up my slack, such as working a room or getting the right people excited. I’m pretty frank in saying “I know I’m not good at that stuff, so I’m even more grateful and admiring that you handled that.”

      1. One more thought: I realized it also helps that I’m someone who people tend to take seriously. In my social life, I have often wished I could come off more breezy, but in management it is a great advantage. I have reports who don’t care what most people think of them, but they do value my opinions. This is important because if I’m confronting someone, the tone is effective, and if I’m praising someone, they know I really mean it.

    4. I find that while introverts don’t make “fast friends” they are fiercely loyal to the people they are close to – as have been my best managers.

    5. Have you read the book Quiet by Susan Cain? She covers this a bit in the beginning of the book, if I remember correctly.

      1. I was going to suggest this. It’s been on my reading list for a while! Is it any good?

        I’m a work extrovert and a super-introvert socially/personally, so basically really good in meeting and physically uncomfortable during happy hours.

        2. I recommend it highly. I’ve definitely shifted on the continuum from extrovert to introvert after I turned 40, so it was interesting to read when you have been on both sides of the coin. But also she is totally charming. If you don’t have time to read the book, at least watch her Ted talk.

    6. I’m an introvert and in a management position, and I was nervous about it too.

      A few pieces of advice that have helped me:

      1. [This is the most important one] Remember that your employees / subordinates don’t want you to be their best friend, they want you to be a good manager. So, sometimes I think, “Uugghh, I seem stiff / unapproachable / cold, I should pal around with people more…” but then I realize that it is much, much more important to people that their boss be a good boss: consistent, fair, watching out for them, grateful when they do good work, etc than that they be super social and fun. And the “good boss” stuff is something that both introverts and extroverts can excel at.

      2. Focus on giving praise when it is due. I know I come across as a bit reserved, and I don’t want my employees to think that I am displeased with them or their work when really, my style just isn’t overly effusive. So, when I’m happy with how something went, I make a point of seeking out whoever did the work and saying, “I really appreciate your work on X, I am really pleased with how it has gone and has helped us out with client Y etc etc.” I try to be very specific in my praise so that people know it is genuine – if I were to be overly enthusiastic, I know it would come across as fake. As you know, introverts can be hard to read, and people tend to assume negative things when they have to guess at what you’re thinking. My experience is that people are naturally a bit intimidated by me, so focusing on praise works for me because it “softens” me a bit.

      3. I have found an easy way to communicate things about your personality to others is to casually bring up personality tests. I just say, “Ooh, have you taken a Myers-Briggs [or insert name of other well known test]? I’m an INTJ; I always score high on introversion – I’m so impressed by folks who are naturally outgoing and get re-energized by people! I have heard I come across as kind of cold sometimes, it’s that darn introversion…” or some casual, chatty variety of this.

  13. Man, snowstorms are good for bingewatching. And I just got word that the office is closed tomorrow, too.

    It’s a staycation.

    1. My agency emailed me at midnight to say the firm’s office would be closed, which I didnt see until after I called in to say I couldn’t make it because the trains weren’t running. Then they called at noon to say the office was open and see if I’d come in. Nope! I was already in snow day mode! Finished 2 books, binge watched Numb3rs, and baked a cake. I really wish I’d get tomorrow off too!

    2. I am so jealous.

      Never have I had a snow day. Not from work, not my kids from school.

      And I live in Ontario, and not in the greater Toronto Area.

      #WeAreWinter.

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