Corporette.com

Updated: Nov 1, 2018 242 Comments · by

Wednesday’s TPS Report: Maribeth Two-Tone Cap Sleeve Knot

The Personal Shopper (TPS)· Under $150

This post may contain affiliate links and Corporette® may earn commissions for purchases made through links in this post. As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases.

Our daily TPS reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices. Lauren Ralph Lauren Dress - Maribeth Two-Tone Cap Sleeve KnotBlack and white is always in, and I'm really liking the look of this two-toned, cap-sleeved, knotted dress. Bloomingdale's has it in sizes 0-18 as well as petites, and Dillards has it in plus sizes. There are very similar looking dresses in various lucky sizes on sale around the web — here, here, here, here, and here. The pictured dress is $124. Lauren Ralph Lauren Dress – Maribeth Two-Tone Cap Sleeve Knot Seen a great piece you'd like to recommend? Please e-mail tps@corporette.com. (L-#)  

Sales of note for 9.16.24

Some of our latest posts here at Corporette…

RSS Error: WP HTTP Error: cURL error 60: Issuer certificate is invalid.

And some of our latest threadjacks here at Corporette (reader questions and commentary) — see more here!

Some of our latest threadjacks include:

About Kat

Kat Griffin is the founder, publisher, and editor-in-chief of Corporette. You can read more about her here.

Comments

  1. Miss Behaved

    Wow. I really like this dress. I’m going to have to stock it. Although now that I can work from home, I’m not sure I need it.

  2. midwest mom

    I so love all the dresses shown recently…. if anything as motivation for a flat stomach. Any suggestions on dresses for those of us with a stomach. Yep… I am 47 and carrying around some extra weight that today I am going to blame on menopause. Tomorrow I might blame it on the fact that my only DD is leaving for college in less than a month. I have a great excuse for every day of the week.

    I tend to look at a-line skirts as opposed to dresses. I think pencil skirts are a laugh for my figure. I own lots of pant suits.

    • LawyrChk

      This dress actually looks great with a bit of stomach, because the side knot adds a bit of camouflage with the extra fabric.

      • preg anon

        Agreed. It looks like it would be a go to dress when you need something flattering, easy, and comfortable.

        Sorry about your DD leaving for college. I remember my mom being a mess and never really understood why, but now I get it. :)

      • V

        That’s awesome re your daughter! Congrats from those of us still reminding little ones to go to the potty. Independence is a fuzzy and far-away goal at this point.

        And re tummy — we earn them, don’t we? I think of the gym and physical activity now as preventative physical therapy — I got a late start and I want to be there in good physical condition when my children go to college (and beyond). Maybe you’ve earned a trip to doing something fun that you like: tennis lessons (and fun new tennis outfits)? Riding? Lap swimming? Golf? Something really fun?

    • NOLA

      I’m close to your age and have the same issue. Unless I’m at my thinnest, I can’t wear a dress that’s this close to the body. I have been able to wear pencil skirts, but only with a sweater or tank that comes down over the hip.

    • Francie Nolan

      I have the same figure type and I am wearing a dress today with a sid knot. I can attest to the magic camoflogging abilities of the right side knot on a dress. I get complemented everytime I wear this dress and it is a 20 Bj Club Store special. I am sure that a Ralph Lauren would fall much better and I am stalking all of them in every print!

      BTW I am glad to see that there are more ladies my age, my daughter leaves sept 1 for college. Sometimes I feel so old with all the baby and marriage talk :)

      • Amelia Bedelia

        I am pretty sure your last sentence should say “Sometimes I feel so accomplished with all the baby and marriage talk.” You have a lot to be proud of if you survived raising children and one is heading to college!

    • Pippi

      I think this dress would probably look better on someone with a little bit of a stomach. I’m built like a surfboard and dresses with gathering or ruching at the waist sometimes look kind of funny on me.

    • PollyD

      This looks a lot like a dress I own from Loft (same neckline and side gather). Loft also had a long-sleeved version that I own.

      So: In my 40s? Check (but no kids). Busty (32D)? Check. Belly? A bit, but I also have a rather pronounced curve in my lower back, so even though I have pretty strong abs (ballet and weight-training), my belly still sticks out. This is a very flattering cut on me. I like Spanx/Assets under dresses and skirts for more coverage, and even just a bit of control (I don’t do the super-control kind) smooths things out and makes the dresses look good.

      TL;DR – even if you have a bit of a belly and are busty, give this style of dress a try!

  3. LawyrChk

    I have this cut of dress from Lauren Ralph Lauren in three colors/patterns, and I can’t sing its praises loudly enough. Machine washable, very flattering cut (hides a tummy and makes you look like you have a waist), stretchy fabric that doesn’t cling. Holds up well to multiple washes and runs TTS. I’ve had my oldest dress for 2+ years, wearing every two weeks or so, and it still looks new.

    At least in my area, you can almost always find an iteration of this dress at the local TJ Maxx for around $50.

    • Mpls

      LRL dresses are the best. Seriously. And for the tall ladies – they are generally long enough to hit at or near the knee (knee length on this 5’10” person).

      I generally go for the more expensive ones (regular price $110ish?) because they have a lining under the jersey and the jersey is a little thicker). There is a less expensive version, but it’s a thinner jersey with no lining, which makes the VPL issues more apparent. The dresses come out every season in new colors though, so the seem to go on sale fairly frequently (at Macys and the like).

      • MH

        Sold. I think I’m going to read all your clothing posts from now on, Mpls, for your tall woman fashion advice.

        • Mpls

          Well – that was pretty much it. Although, the merino wool Tippi cardigans (as opposed to sweaters) at Jcrew have nice long sleeves. Those are a buy for me (when they are on sale with a % off, anyway.)

          • MH

            Yeah, I have 3 of those. They really are great. I also like how they nip in at the waist a little bit.

    • CFT

      I second this! This dress is awesome. I have it in two colors. Totally flattering on me (sz. 12 with weight in stomach and thighs) and very comfortable! I got mine at Macy’s.

    • Nonny

      Yes – I got mine at Ross for $50. With the amount that I wear it, on a price-per-wear basis I’m averaging about $2, and I’ve only owned it since January.

      Interesting that the more expensive ones have lining and are made with better jersey. I’ll have to check that out…next year.

  4. Amelia Bedelia

    I want this dress. I NEED this dress!
    I am large of chest and normally don’t wear anything with that neckline. Any thought to whether I can pull it off since it has the twist at the waist? I really don’t want to rock the una-boob at work . . .

    • Amelia Bedelia

      hmm. I can’t really wear necklaces due to a neck issue. weird, I know.

      I may still pull the trigger and purchase. does anyone have a free shipping code? I despise paying for shipping.

    • Anon

      I won this dress in multiple patterns specifically because it really flatters my large-chested, hour-glassy figure, without making me look slutty. I highly recommend it. I also have bought it at my local Ross several times for under $50.

    • AN

      if you are large of chest, I would not buy this dress. I have the RL one and it didn’t look good. just accentuated the chest. JSFAMO.

  5. Humdilly

    Going to a happy hour for a good friend from high school’s 24th birthday tonight. She asked that instead of presents, we all bring her some bits of wisdom. This friend and her entire group of friends are much more free-spirited than I am. She’s mid job hunt, online dating, and considering a cross-country move soon. I’ve decided to give her some tangible advice, because the free-spirited “follow your heart” advice isn’t my specialty!

    So far I bought her “The Defining Decade” but it’s not a present because I’ll take it back to read it once she’s done. For wisdom all I have is “always invest up to the employer matching amount in your 401K.” Any more ideas?

    • Sydney Bristow

      For the online dating thing, my advice that I received from someone here is to meet anyone who seems normal and potentially interesting. Then she can schedule a bunch more dates and there is less pressure on any individual date.

      • TBK

        I agree on the not putting too much pressure on one date, but I’d also say not to be afraid of being choosy. I have about a decade on you and I think when I was younger I thought I was being prissy or stuck up if I wanted guys to be too much like me (college educated, good job, etc.) As I’ve gotten older, I’ve realized that there’s a reason people tend to marry people like them. I’m not saying it doesn’t work, but it’s a lot harder. There are clear fault lines in my marriage that run right along the places where Mr. and I are different (he’s a southern country boy, and I’m a northeastern city girl). Our marriage is good and we’re happy, but those are the areas that cause tension. So my advice would be not to think you have to be “nice” or “keep an open mind” (how many accomplished young women are told that?!) and just go for the guys who truly interest you.

        • Sydney Bristow

          That’s a great thing to keep in mind. In my case, I really had trouble getting to know someone online so meeting in person was key. The endless back and forth writing wasn’t doing it for me so I would keep it to a few messages and then suggest meeting if I had any interest. It also probably helped me narrow down specific things that I thought I’d wanted or didn’t want that changed when I came face to face with them.

          But I absolutely agree with you on the pressure to be nice and keep an open mind that we grow up with. It’s something I’ve been thinking about lately.

        • anne-on

          Omg, this. Do not date guys who are *proud* of not having a steady job/source of income/paying for drinks with spare change. 24-year old me realllly needed to hear this and stop romanticizing the ‘following his dreams’ (on your dime) guy.

      • MaggieLizer

        Listen to your gut. If something seems off to you – even if you can’t put your finger on it, even if your friends tell you you’re crazy, even if you feel like you’re being “prissy” like TBK said – trust that instinct. Figure out what your dealbreakers are – and do not apologize for them! – and watch out for those up front.

      • gouda

        Math sez- if she puts in $500 this year and it gains 7.2% each year (cursory googling suggests this is the average market return for the last decade) it will be worth ~$8000 in 40 years. I’m actually kicking my younger self for not doing this.

    • L

      Start using under eye cream. Because it doesn’t take long (for me it was literally 25) before my circles/bags were a permanent fixture.

      Less vain advice – have fun! go out dancing on a Tuesday night just because you can.

      • Veronique

        For vanity and health, daily sunscreen on her face, neck, chest and hands (areas that get the most sun and show age first). All over sunscreen when she’ll be outdoors for a while. Reapply as necessary.

        Strictly vanity, start using some sort of retinol. Doesn’t have to be prescription, but it’s the most proven anti-aging ingredient after sunscreen and she’ll probably see benefits (smoother skin, etc) almost immediately.

        • Frugal doc..

          +1 on all of these.

          Daily sunscreen and definitely don’t forget exposed neck/chest/back of hands. Those show age the quickest… before the face. And of course, wear sunglasses all the time.

          Also agree with the retinol, but if you have to pay out of pocket I may put it off until later.

          A separate eye cream isn’t really necessary. Just use what you use on your face under your eyes.

    • S

      I’d suggest to start working on yourself to invest in your future happiness whatever that may be: therapy, finding a good exercise routine you’d like to keep long term, getting a hobby that makes you happy that you’d like to stick with, etc.

    • Ginjury

      I recently started reading that book and it sounds perfect for her. That may be all you need.

    • Humdilly

      Thank you everyone! I’m going to compile these and add reading this site, and any other sites that relate to her industry/goals.

  6. Anon for this

    Today’s career question is….
    I’m a rising 3L interning at a trade association for the summer – one specific industry, pretty technical and specific. I actually got this internship pretty last minute when something else fell through, as I was helping my husband, who just graduated from law school, job hunt. This is in the field HE wants to practice, not me at all, but i figured good experience, and it was, but just confirmed further that i do not like this subject area. I want to introduce my husband to the people here, as he is still unemployed with not a ton of prospects. Many of the people here are alums of his law school and this is really the subject area he loves, not me. Is that overstepping? Any ideas for how to go about this? I did a good job this summer and generally think I’m well liked here and no one has caught on yet at how much I dislike this subject area…

    • S

      No advice on the intros, but I think you may need to let you husband’s job search be his and back off of it. How’s your job search for after graduation going? What do you want to do? How are you going to get introduced to connections in that area? It will probably help both of you to focus on yourself.

      • TBK

        I disagree. I see nothing here that suggests that she is or is not focusing on her own career. I think it would be fine to talk to some of his law school alums about his interest. I wouldn’t mention your interest one way or the other, but ask if they would be open to him sending a brief email with his resume, to see if his qualifications would be a good fit. You could also see if they’d be open to meeting with him briefly for a coffee to talk about how to get started in a career in this field.

    • M

      I’m with TBK. I’m a recent graduate and I just got my first post-clerkship position. My partner is also an attorney and he was very helpful in my job search. He introduced me to several partners in his firm who practice in my area of interest. They were willing to speak to me about the field generally and their particular experiences/practices.
      In general, I think networking with anyone you can get your hands on is a good idea! I did a lot of informational interviews–probably 15–some of which resulted in introductions to partners at firms that were hiring. I found that most people were receptive to doing an info-interview and, moreover, it was really good practice to discuss my professional interests with experienced attorneys outside of the formal interview context.

    • Nordies Lover

      Are you friendly enough with them that you could set up a lunch or happy hour and invite your husband? I’m just wondering if that will help him network with them more organically for the first meeting, and then there might be less pressure (for you and him) if he tries to set up additional meetings.

      • rosie

        This is what I would do. If your company has other activities–either for the summers or summer picnic-type things–your husband could probably join for some of those activities that generally include partners/families.

        • TBK

          You can certainly do that, too, but I wouldn’t shy away from the straight ask. People don’t always intuit what you want, so just having your husband along might not signal to them that he would like some networking contacts. And it might seem pushier if your husband raised the issue at a social event with someone he’d just met than if you asked the same question during work hours of someone with whom you’d built a working relationship. If he wants to have someone look at his resume, or meet for coffee, you should straight up ask some of your co-workers if they’d be up for that. Or just say your husband is intersted and would it be okay if you passed along their email to him.

  8. Woods-comma-Elle

    This is gorgeous but I hardly ever wear black and just scooped up a Kenneth Cole dress in the sale at 80% off that is too similar. Gah.

  9. nice cube

    i have one of these dresses in red. i always feel too va-va-voom in it for work. i am somewhat busty and i think the high necklline makes me look bigger on top. i like the suggestion of a long necklace to break that up – i will have to try that. would a cardigan look weird? not sure what kind would look best, boyfriend? cropped?

  10. NAS

    Do sold-out items at the Nordstrom Anniversary Sale ever come back? Either later in the sale or after the sale is over?

    • A Nonny Moose

      They’re part of the fall line so in general, yes, they should be back. Whether that’s during the sale or not I’m not totally sure of, but I’d imagine if there were returns, things would pop back into stock.

  11. Veronique

    For those of you who are genetically blessed in the posterior area, how do you decide what is and isn’t work appropriate? I tend towards being more conservative at work and only would only wear jersey in an a-line, if at all. Similarly, the only pencil skirt that I wear on a regular basis is lined, non-stretch wool. I’m not trying to hide my booty (my clothes fit me) but I’m not trying to enhance it either (which clothes that stretch tend to do).

    • Anon

      I skip anything that shows the entire curve of my b**b or my b*tt. I actually ordered the featured dress in a solid blue and returned it because it was va-va-voom. I’m not conventionally curvy (no Salma Hayek here) but I am in very good shape and definitely have a very defined b*tt, arms, abs, etc. If I try something on and think I look a little s*xy, then it isn’t office appropriate (to me).

      I wear pencil skirts, but they are wool and lined and I make sure that the fit is such that they fall straight down in the back instead of curving back under my b*tt. Same with tops (I wear them large enough so they don’t curve in under my b**bs.

      I’m not trying to hide my body, but like I said, I’m not going for s*xy at work. My clothes fit me well, but I’m going for classic/conservative/feminine, not s*xy.

    • Ellen

      My dad point’s out almost DAILY that I have issue’s here (or back there). I usueally do NOT buy a dress unless I try it on with someone OTHER then the saleslady there, b/c they ALWAYS rave about how great I look. My other rule is to ask ROSA about whether she think’s the dress would look good on me. She has a very flat tuchus b/c she does pilate’s and zoomba, and she does NOT have to sit at work on her tuchus all day like I do stareing at a computer screen! FOOEY!

      If Rosa says it is good for her, I then ask, would it be good for me and my tuchus? She usueally is very frank, b/c she knows that Dad does NOT like me to parade around with a noticeable SHELF. He says that I am NOT a JAY-LO, so should not to think that the kind of guy’s she attracts are any good for me.

      Once I get the OK from Rosa, and try on the dress, I usueally buy it! YAY!!!!

    • Monday

      I think this is a very individual judgment call and depends on a lot of variables. It also may change for you over time. I don’t have any rule of thumb here, but I try to balance the wish not to draw inaappropriate attention to myself against the acknowledgment that, you know, it is what it is. I feel like monitoring all the curves of my fabric can quickly tend toward shame and a sense that being a woman in itself is something I’m supposed to play down. Inappropriate attention is going to come no matter what, and I have other things to think about.

      Interested to see other responses.

      • JJ

        I agree with Monday. I’m “blessed” enough in that region that if I were to avoid all curves or suggestions, I’d be stuck wearing mumus every day. So, I don’t go out of my way to wear Herve Leger at work (not that I would pay that much anyway, but you know…) but otherwise, it is what it is.

        Simply put, I don’t feel like it’s my job to hide things I can’t change – I’m tall and I’m curvy. Deal with it.

      • Brooklyn Paralegal

        I agree with this entirely. I try to dress mindfully, but the fact is also that I’m a 24-year-old woman in good shape working in a very small, all-male firm (the only other woman here is also a paralegal). I find that the men I work with are respectful, but not all of our clients are all the time. Like, today I’m wearing a pencil skirt that I love, but I paired it with a looser-fitting top and a cardigan so that I’m not accentuating all of my curves (like Anon above, I’m no Salma Hayek, but I’ve definitely got a b**t and a chest).

        It’s one thing to dress in an office-appropriate manner, which I acknowledge is important and necessary, but I refuse to dress in totally unflattering clothing or clothing that I don’t like to pretend that my body isn’t here. At a certain point, the responsibility needs to shift from the woman receiving inappropriate attention and onto the people that give it.

        Beyond that, I’ve found that some people (primarily men) make assumptions about me based on my age and gender as well, and while I dress in a way that makes clear I take my job seriously, no matter how wide-legged the slacks or loose-fitting the dress or shirt, those men are going to assume I’m a receptionist or I’m a cute part of the office decor anyway, and frankly that’s not my problem. I’m proud of the work that I’ve done (put myself through college waiting tables and got a senior paralegal position straight out of undergrad, currently applying to law school) and I refuse to bend over backwards to accommodate outdated, sexist attitudes towards women in the workplace. And I’ve found that I’m very capable of quickly setting the record straight with the way I speak and the way I handle myself.

        (Sorry for the novel-length response; this is something I think about often!)

        • Veronique

          I feel somewhere between you and Anon in deciding what to wear. I tend to err on the side of conservatism because it’s more in line with my professional style. There are certain items of clothing (low cut tops, skirts so tight that they create smile lines) that I just don’t wear to work. Much of what is portrayed as professional on tv (Cutty from House, Rachel on Suits) is just a smidge too tight for me. There is no hiding the fact that I have a booty, but I don’t dress to highlight it either. I wear clothing that is flattering and shows that I have a shape, but I prefer it to skim my body rather than hug it. For a pop culture reference, Olivia Pope mostly gets it right. KW is slim, but she still definitely has curves. Her clothing is flattering and doesn’t hide them, but doesn’t hug them either.

          Fortunately, I haven’t had to deal with inappropriate attention at work, so I don’t (consciously) factor that in. I mostly evaluate my clothes from my personal standard of professional fit, as I agree that some people will be inappropriate no matter what you wear.

      • Agree

        I totally agree. I am mindful of not wearing anything that is inappropriately cut (too tight, too low cut, etc), but I’m not going to not wear well-fitting, tailored clothes simply because it might show a curve here or there. I work hard to be proud of my body!

    • downstream

      there was actually a post on this a while back with a very lively discussion. I’m not wide but I’m very three-dimensional, and If I wore things that went straight down from the furthest part of my butt, I’d be wearing tents. I’m not going to wear bandage skirts or super-slim pencil skirts to work, but I’m also not going to drive myself crazy. Agree with Monday that thinking about this quickly spirals to shame and the sense that being a woman is something you need to hide.

      Also, Spanx or a slip can help a lot. Not only does Spanx make you a smidge smaller, it keeps everything in one place so you don’t jiggle.

      • MH

        This. I can’t wear things that just fall straight – they make me look much much larger than I actually am. And I’d have to tailor everything I bought to nip it in at the waist. I just go for thicker fabrics that give some (but not much) posterior definition.

    • Lynnet

      This isn’t relevant to your overall question, but I am also blessed in the posterior region and am wearing a jersey dress today (the shirred side cap sleeve dress from Loft). For work I’ll only wear jersey if a) it’s lined and b) it has some kind of pattern that will hide my lumps. I figure if my somewhat substantial saddlebags are hidden to my satisfaction, the backside of the dress probably looks fine.

      In terms of other skirts, I used to be really worried about what size of The Skirt to wear, until I tried on several sizes and showed them to my male roommate and he didn’t see any difference between them. I realized that really, I was the only person paying a ton of attention to the sexiness of my skirts (although none of the options were tight enough that everything was outlined).

    • P

      This is a good question. I’m quite curvy (not terribly voluptuous up top, but my waist/hip+booty ratio is more noticeable than average) and I can’t say I shy away from things that show that. Of course, like other posters, I’m not wearing anything too tight or low cut, but in order to find a an article of clothing that didn’t show off some distinctive curves I would have to wear something ill-fitting and huge and I have no interest in doing that.

      And apart from that, I don’t think it’s a terrible thing for people to see a smart, professional woman with – gasp! – a butt that you can see through her skirt. The idea that someone can only be considered professional and competent if they have no clearly visible female attributes is a dichotomy I don’t want to reinforce.

      • Monday

        It’s so awesome to see how many others see this the way I do–as being connected to stereotypes, sexism etc., in addition to simply wanting to wear flattering fits. I now feel less apologetic than ever in my pencil skirt!

    • Midwest Transplant

      I’m going to be a bit of a dissenter here. As a woman with a generous backside, I know there is a portion of the population that notices these assets in the world, but I would prefer for them to not notice in the workplace. As much as we would like to say that everyone is evaluated only for the quality of thier work, I know that the first impression you give can make a difference. I try to dress in a way that is “professional” for my body and MY comfort level with showing my shape at work. For me this means that I feel most comfortable downplaying the lower half but emphasizing the waist. I wear mostly pencil skirts (with blouses tucked in) and sheath dresses (majorly tailored) with jackets or cardigans on top to smooth out the silhouette.

      However, dressing appropriately for the office isn’t a direct matter of shape. Regardless of if you have a large or small chest, there is a point at which a shirt is too low cut, although that specific point may vary. Likewise, with an ample or flat behind, there are skirts that are going to be too tight or too short. You have to figure out what works for you and your place of business.

      To answer the orginal question. In my world, a skirt that significantly cups underneath or touches the back of my thighs is too tight, but if it just skims underneath then hangs down from a place not quite at the largest, well thats what I’m working with.

  12. Anonymous

    I need advice/support. I have been asked to leave my job and will be gone in 2 months if I’m not gone by then on my own. Obviously I have been job hunting like mad and I’ve been hitting up my network too. I’ve had a few interviews but no offers yet, and no real contenders right now. I am in an absolute panic. My self-confidence is in the toilet (because I’m being let go) and I feel like all my education and prior work experience has been for nothing. I am terrified of having to tell a future employer that I was let go from my job, especially because it’s been more of a personality conflict between me and boss and not anything really tangible. I’m terrified of being out of a job for many months. I’m terrified that I will have to start over either in the same field, or in a different one. Everything just feels like it is crashing down around me and I wonder why I worked so hard to get here in the first place. I’m sorry if this doesn’t make any sense. I just need someone to tell me everything is going to be OK. (I am not in law, by the way, so law-specific advice/tips won’t help – but I’d be very appreciative of more general advice)

    • L

      The way I look at it, you’re in a fairly decent position. You’re not being told your work sucks, your boss is just a three-headed dragon. Take a deep breath and start writing down all your accomplishments (even the tiny ones). Read them every day and practice stories about relevant ones for your interviews. If/when you do have to talk about why you’re leaving, you can simply say that it wasn’t a great fit between you and your boss. Be prepared to talk about how you are a go-getter/team-player/whatever your field typically likes and give examples of how *outside of this one job* you’ve embodied this and/or how you’ve improved on these skills.

      Finally, I think most people are forgiving of a ‘fit issue’ once, maybe even twice. It’s if every job you’ve ever left is because it wasn’t a good fit is when you are viewed as difficult.

    • been there

      This happened to me at the beginning of my career. I was given a month and at the end of that month, had nothing lined up. Was it a bit awkward to explain why I left my old firm without a new lily pad to land on? Yes, but then the moment passed. That time between jobs was really crushing to my self esteem (especially because I was coming from a somewhat toxic environment) but I got past it. Now, several jobs later, I can say it was truly for the best. It will be ok. You are not a terrible person, you are not a dumb person. You were just in a job that didn’t work out for you. You’ll find another job that does work better. This boss is just one boss in a lifetime of bosses. I doubt all your previous bosses disliked you.

      • OP

        Thank you. Crushing is certainly the right word for how this all feels to me. May I ask how long it took you to find something else?

        • been there

          It was a couple of months before I got into a permanent position. I did some part-time contract work beginning in month two , picked up another part-time gig in month three that turned into a full-time position. But, don’t be afraid of the part time work if you can do it in your field. It kept me motivated and my skills sharp, plus it helped me get the bad taste out of my mouth from my previous gig.

    • HeyNonnyNonny

      I’m just getting out of a similar situation. I am consciously trying to change my outlook to remove my self worth from my job. I want to be a work to live, not live to work kind of person.

  13. Paging 'Binges'

    I missed your post yesterday, but wanted to reach out because lady, I am right there with you. I could eat until I am/was physically ill and would still want more. I am pretty severely overweight and have health problems because of it and am still relatively young. Scary, right?

    I dunno if you’ll see this, but honestly there is no last resort. You have to pick yourself up and try again. The ‘last resort’ thinking is dangerous and just leads you to fail (trust me, I’m sooo there, I technically qualify as obese and finally doing something about it).

    The only thing that seems to have switched the bit in my head is stop thinking that I only have one chance to stop stuffing myself. I have to be honest with myself and to me this means tracking what I eat (bad, good, indifferent) and trying to exercise. If I can’t stay within the boundaries I set for myself – therapy. If I can and still am not losing weight then there is something medically wrong. The idea of setting it up as an ‘experiment’ has really helped me get positive about becoming healthy.

    I also read Eat what you love. I’m normally not all into the psychology of eating, BUT I was impressed with the way she frames it. I am never going to be a person who doesn’t eat cake at a birthday party, but I also don’t want to be the person who basically eats the whole cake once everyone leaves. Her book was helpful in figuring out the cycle and making me a bit more mindful about when/why I eat massive amounts of food.

    It’s hard. If it were easy, there wouldn’t be a million dollar industry dedicated to diet and weight loss.

    • Sydney Bristow

      I didn’t participate yesterday, but I’ve also been there and was obese as a result. I’ve lost quite a bit of weight with the help of a nutritionist and monthly visits/weigh-ins. She has helped me narrow things down to good healthy choices when I’m feeling hungry and want to feel full again. It’s taken a lot of work to get in tune with my body’s hunger signals again and they’ve adjusted over time. I didn’t get external medical help for a long time, although I did try Weight Watchers and Nutrisystem, because it seems like there is so much info out there and it seems like common sense and stuff I already know. There’s a big difference between knowing and putting that knowledge into action though. Seeing a nutritionist and having monthly check ins has been extremely helpful for me in that regard. She’s given me great ideas that I hadn’t thought of, talked me through areas where I’d heard conflicting information, cheered me on, and has just been a great resource in general. Don’t be ashamed to reach out for help if you need it!

      • L

        Thanks!! I have thought about it and always wondered if it was a good thing or just a racket; I’m glad to hear it is worth it. I’m debating on doing it later on in the process because at some point I’d like to make sure I’m getting most of my nutrition from my food and I’m terrible at variety. Right now, I’m focused on trying to incorporate more fresh fruits/veggies into my diet, which is HARD. I’m giving myself a pass on counting calories for those items right now (because realistically I’m not going to eat 1000 calories worth of carrots) to incentivize myself to reach for better things when I’m hungrier. So far, so good, but definitely something I will consider in the near future.

        • Merabella

          One thing that I have done is setting a goal of eating at least one fruit or vegetable with every meal/snack. This way I know I’m at least getting those in, and it helps me to feel more full and satisfied.

          I definitely think that hiring a nutritionist or finding a support group really helps with this process, for nothing else than it gives you some accountability. For myself, when I have to go it alone I find myself justifying bad choices, when there is someone I have to justify them to I am more honest.

        • Sydney Bristow

          My biggest thing has been protein. I really struggle trying to get enough protein in during the day, which is something I didn’t really know before. I have found that protein with a little bit of fat does keep me more full than carbs do. My main focus has been breakfast and I try to get up early enough to make myself eggs in the morning instead of grabbing a granola bar or bagel. It really does make a difference for me.

        • Lynnet

          My husband and I have been trying and succeeding at eating more veggies and fruits recently and the things we’ve found that have been most useful have been 1) shopping primarily at Sprouts, where fruits and veggies are much cheaper than King Soopers/Kroger and everything processed is much more expensive. I can’t bring myself to pay two or three dollars for a box of pasta, so we eat a lot less pasta and a lot more “real food.” 2) Lazy dinners, where we get out a pretty tray and put cheese, crackers, and whatever raw fruits and veggies we have on it and that’s dinner. This forces us to actually eat the fruits and veggies we buy at Sprouts by making it the option of least resistance.

        • MK

          After trying South Beach, calorie counting apps, etc., I recently joined Weight Watchers (online only) and have been pleasantly surprised at how well it’s worked. I LOVE that they give you unlimited fruits and veggies, and it’s really forced me to pay attention to portion sizes for fats and carbs. I also love that there are no off-limits foods, just ones with higher points values. I can have that slice of cake, but if I eat the whole thing then I can only eat fruits and veggies for dinner cause I’ll have used up all of my points! I don’t know, something about the mindset of the whole thing just makes a lot more sense than having cake and fruit count for the same calories or banning cake entirely.

    • Anon

      I didn’t see the post yesterday but I’ve faced binge eating issues in the past and wanted to share what’s helped me. I have a normal weight but I really attribute that to the structure I’ve set up for myself – I need the structure because I lack the self-discipline to avoid tempting foods/emotional eating. Basically the structure minimizes the number of times I have to say ‘no’ to junk food.

      I cannot keep junk food in the house at all (no chips/chocolate/ice cream etc). Hubby loves Nutella but it’s not allowed in the house because I will eat the whole jar with a spoon in one sitting. He keeps a jar at work. If he wants chips etc he buys an individual size portion for himself.

      When grocery shopping I avoid the chips/candy aisle and if I really want something I don’t deny myself but I only buy the individual size packages at the check-out. We don’t shop in bulk either – that way I can’t binge on the borderline unhealthy stuff (mozzarella/crackers/frozen yoghurt etc). There’s a big calorie difference between eating an entire box of crackers and eating an entire Costco size box of crackers.

      For my commute to work I take a slightly longer route that reduces the number of fast food places I drive past – less times I have to say ‘no’ to fast food. Binging by myself in the car after a rough day was a big problem. Also, the local veggie restaurant is on speed dial for ordering in but we throw out all fast food flyers so it’s more hassle to order pizza etc.

      Hope some of that helps. And remember that everyday you can start over. Just focusing on reducing the slip-ups – you won’t eat perfectly all the time – you just have to eat healthy most of the time.

    • Anon

      I’m also a normal weight but struggle internally with this a lot. I have a really hard time leaving anything on my plate…. ever. I pretty much will eat everything given to me, no matter how full I am. As wasteful and embarrassing as this is, I regularly order sides that I don’t like when I go out to dinner just so I can’t eat them– i.e. instead of getting fries and eating every single one whether I want them or not, I’ll order the potato salad, which I don’t like. It’s harder when I’m the one making food at home.

    • Senior Attorney

      I saw this only late yesterday, but since it’s back today I’ll put in my two cents.

      I also love the feeling of being full, and I love eating a lot of food. I second the suggestion of setting up a good, failsafe structure with your food. In addition, I have had good success with a low-fat vegan diet, a la http://www.drmcdougall.com. It isn’t for everybody, but I love that I can eat as much brown rice and potatoes and veggies as I want, until I have the “really full” feeling, and I still am able to keep my weight in check. Plus it turns out you just don’t WANT to eat as much of that kind of food because it’s not as entertaining as the junky stuff in the standard American diet. I’m not super fanatic about it, but I stick to it as closely as I can and it’s helped.

      • Marilla

        I looove food and love eating – I relate so much to that scene in Ratatouille where he tries different flavours together and has a symphony with fireworks going on in his brain, because that’s totally how I feel when I eat something new or amazing. Two things work for me. One is similar to Senior Attorney’s suggestion, although I’m not vegan — I try to fill up my plates with lots of different salads and veggies and may even eat a plate of just salad before I touch the carb or protein. This especially helps with fancy meals where I’ve cooked something special and would love to keep tasting it. The other thing I try to remember is differentiating between being tired and being actually hungry, because I do have a tendency to eat when I’m tired and I find in those cases my “stop, I’m full!” signal is very muted. For the past 6 months or so, I’ve completely cut out snacking after dinner unless I’m sure I’m actually starving, not just tired and not just mildly hungry. It took a few weeks of saying no to myself but now it’s more natural.

    • Humdilly

      My biggest portion control savior is that I love saving money even more than I love eating. My biggest way to cut back on eating is by always saving half of my dinner for lunch the next day. Even if I still feel hungry, I have to put half of the sandwich in the to-go container or I’ll have to spend more money at lunch tomorrow and I just spent $10+ on dinner. If it’s a small meal, I’ll get a side salad or brothy soup to make half of the meal feel bigger.

      Last night, for example, we went to buffalo wild wings for wing night. I ate 4 wings there, along with some potato wedges. Now today I have 4 boneless wings that I’ll put on top of salad fixings for a buffalo chicken salad. $11 for two meals including potato wedges and salad!

      • Merabella

        This is a good idea. Generally portions at restaurants are more than one serving anyway. This way you are practicing portion control and saving money.

      • downstream

        This also helps when you order in – once your food gets there, cut it in half and put half in the fridge. Eat the other half. If you’re still hungry in an hour, you can warm up and eat the remainders.

      • L

        I LOVE this. DH and I figured out how much we were spending going out to eat (not even at nice splurge restaurants, just every day takeout) and I was floored. For my initial phase I’m trying to limit eating out (save $ and calories) but when we do I’m going to try this.

    • Aria

      A couple of years ago I went to a doctor and went on a severely restricted diet – 800 calories a day based primarily on shakes and soy crisps. I lost 25 pounds in three months and can honestly say I wasn’t ever that hungry and I learned that I had to eat to live, not live to eat. While I’m not recommending everyone do something this drastic, the most important thing I learned was never to let myself get hungry. If you’re starving by lunch you’re more likely to overeat — instead I ate ~150-200 calories every 3 hours regardless of whether I was hungry (sometimes I had to force myself to eat). This meant that I never hit that “starving” feeling. I also focused on eating sensations — dieting made me want crisp and crunchy things, so I tended to snack on things like 100-calorie bags of popcorn or a handful of Triscuit crackers. Pay attention to what you crave and try to meet the craving positively.

      But the most important thing I learned was that food was fuel. I didn’t have to enjoy it, I didn’t have to savor it and it was ok to be less than satisfied. Over time I had less sugar cravings and was better about portion control, even when I went off the diet.

    • Anon.

      Have struggled with similar issues and recommend two books – Bringing up Bebe and French Women Don’t Get Fat. They’re both entertaining/light and helped me reconsider my views on , and relationship to, food.

  14. B

    How do you ladies make decisions about your time?

    Ie. I’m on a sports team and we are going on a weekend trip. Right now it’s set up so we are gone Sat all day through Sunday around 3PM (if then). I’m trying to balance doing fun outdoorsy things with the fact that I’d like to get my paperwork re student loans in order/alone time.

    This seems like a relatively simple decision but it’s killlllling me.

    • Anonymous

      I tend to classify things pressing into my time into buckets of:

      1) “Need to do” – Always takes priority
      2) “Want to do” – because I think achieving a balance in my life is key and I think a large part of that is doing things that make me happy
      3) “Should do” – just as it sounds, things I feel obligated to do but don’t really NEED to
      4) “Could do” – mostly little things that I am ambivalent towards doing or not

      Now I am a born procrastinator, so I probably should be more proactive with some of the “should do” items, before they become “need to do.” But this system works pretty well for me.

    • Brooklyn Paralegal

      This may seem really silly and simple, but I’ve been trying it out for the past few months and it’s been really helpful. I don’t know if it will help with your specific situation, but it’s helped me manage my time generally.

      I–and I think many people–typically say “I don’t have time” in response to something they don’t want to do, particularly requests from other people. (Like, friend is insistent on getting drinks but I’ve had a long week of work and want to sit on the couch and drink a glass of wine alone.) Instead of “I don’t have time”, I’ve been using “That’s not my priority.” Of course, you can’t always tell someone flat out that what they want isn’t your priority, but it’s helpful even as a reminder to yourself, especially if you feel a ton of guilt at saying no to people like I do. Your time is yours. It’s easy to forget that.

      • New Bride

        You can always say, “I can’t make it that weekend.” People may think you have something else planned, and you do – it’s an appointment with yourself.

        • Brooklyn Paralegal

          I like that idea! I’m going to use that next time I want to spend my Saturday night cracking open a bottle of wine and watching reruns of Buffy or The West Wing. (I know, they make no sense together, but I love them both.)

      • skm

        i like “i’m not able to do that” better than “that’s not my priority”. in the former, you can’t do it (even if the reason you can’t is because you can’t bring yourself to go), the latter, you’re straight up telling them it’s not as important to you. less harsh… deliver it confidently and 60% of the time it works every time.

  15. Ms. Basil E. Frankweiler

    Ladies, I am absolutely swamped with work, so I won’t be able to participate in this discussion, but I was hoping to get some tips about dealing with a micromanaging boss. I am not going to be able to change her and, for whatever reason, I have become the one that she targets when she gets frustrated, so I need some coping techniques. Thanks in advance. Hope to get back here soon.

    • mascot

      Can you give her something tangible to look at? Perhaps a status chart that she can access so she doesn’t ask you every time. It’s more work for you, but it might fulfill her need to be on top of everything.

    • Anonymous

      I agree with mascot. My micromanaging boss wanted daily reports plus weekly summaries on Monday and Fridays (ugh). Maybe ask her if she would prefer some type of regularly scheduled update from you so she feels in the loop on every miniscule task.

    • TO Lawyer

      My boss is a micro-manager and I’m probably in the same boat as you. I’ve noticed he feels a lot more comfortable (and is less likely to breathe down my neck constantly) if he feels like he’s supported so sometimes (by sometimes, I mean like a few times a day) that means I drop by his office to give him a status update or ask him a dumb question – it’s frustrating but in the long run, he’s less frustrating if he feels like he knows what’s going on.

  16. J.M.

    My best friend is having her first baby and it is taking for-ev-er. She was due last Saturday (7/13), was induced this past Monday and is still in the hospital with little progress. They’re hoping for baby by tomorrow, but she’s been in the hospital for a really long time now and is very frustrated and also bored out of her mind. I’m across the country so I can’t go visit (but I’ve been texting a lot, and a phone call last night).

    Should I have something delivered to her hospital room? Flowers, cookies, something? I feel really helpless and I want to help make her feel better in some way but I’m not sure what to do. She’s in Boston, so there should be good delivery options I think. Has anyone been in a similar situation, do you remember what would have helped you? I’m almost hesitant to send flowers because it seems like something you do to congratulate once the baby comes, and he’s stillllll not here. Also it may be annoying to transport home? I don’t know, I just want to do something! Any thoughts are appreciated (also, any good Boston delivery options).

    • espresso bean

      You are so sweet to want to send something! However, I think with the baby’s arrival being this close, you might want to just continue expressing support and wait to send an actual gift until he/she is born. It sounds like the baby will arrive any day now. Just keep being the great friend that you are by letting her vent and texting/call with support — I think that’s the best thing you can do at this frustrating stage.

      • J.M.

        Thanks for the reply! I want to do something, but I think you’re probably right, I should just keep in contact but hold off until the baby arrives. Hopefully soon!

    • downstream

      You might want to avoid food because once she’s induced she might not be able to eat (they restrict your eating in case of an emergency C-section).

      • J.M.

        Thanks for the tip! I thought this too, but she was actually induced yesterday morning and has been eating normally all yesterday and again today. Maybe because it’s progressing so slowly? Honestly her pregnancy has been dispelling a lot of things I thought I knew about pregnancy/birth.

  17. Bumps in the Road

    I’ve always operated under the assumption that it’s normal to be depressed in a depressing situation, and has gotten me through bouts of depression over the years. Well, now I have all of the traditional signs of depression (exhaustion, weight gain, no interest in doing anything, nothing is fun) for a depressing situation – moved across country a few months ago away from a good social life, broke up with a serious boyfriend, new job stresses, etc. Am I doing myself a disservice by continuing to struggle through this on my own, saying it’s normal? Would anti-depressants really make me feel better about life, make me able to have fun again despite the major life changes? Or is it wrong somehow to use medicine as a crutch to get over bumps in the road?

    • espresso bean

      Have you tried therapy? If not, I would start there. Sometimes therapy on its own can help; sometimes you need a combination of therapy and meds.

    • Anne Shirley

      You know who can really help you work through this? A therapist. I think you are doing yourself a serious disservice by working through this on your own. Doesn’t mean you have to rush into meds for sure, but I try and look at it as a service. Like visiting a skilled mechanic for car tube-up: I’m nit sure if that noise is normal or serious, but there’s someone out there with the expertise to tell me, and I want that person working for me.

      • Anonymous

        On the flip side – don’t be bummed if a therapist doesn’t work for you. Therapy is hugely helpful and useful to many people and I don’t meant to discount them – but don’t feel like there is something “broken” about you if you see several different therapists (as I did) and still find that none of it is very helpful to you.

        “Therapy” doesn’t have to take the form of a licensed professional listening to you talk for 55min. “Therapy” for some people can mean taking a long hike or going for a run, getting coffee with an unloading on an old friend, starting volunteer work and throwing yourself into that, etc.

        It isn’t “wrong” to use medication (nor is it a crutch) but I think it’s a big move and potentially unwise to jump to medication as the first solution for depression that is primarily situational. If it were me (and see advice above about different things working for different people) I would first explore other avenues of addressing my depression, and if those things didn’t help, then start investing pharmacological intervention.

        • L

          I am not intending this to be b*tchy, but I hate it when people say it’s ‘unwise’ to ‘jump’ to medication when it comes to mental health. Depression is a real medical condition (situational or not) and deserves to be treated as such. I agree that a person should explore medical and non-medical interventions, but a prescription of Zoloft is not a big move in the grand scheme of things.

          • Anonymous

            I’m not saying medication is always wrong – of course it isn’t.

            The sentence reads:

            “…potentially unwise to jump to medication as the first solution for depression that is primarily situational. ”

            I’m definitely no Tom Cruise and I think medications for mental health have done an enormous good in the world and certainly help a lot of people. I also think it IS a big decision to go on them (even in the grand scheme of things) and needs to be approached with the same level of thought as any other big decision – ie, review all potential options and come to the best one for you.

    • Baconpancakes

      There IS a difference between being “depressed” when you’re in a depressing situation and being depressed. The difference is that once the situation goes away, your mood improves. Being sad is ok!

      That being said, if any little thing gets you down, and you take the excuse of a hard situation to avoid socializing, having fun, and enjoying the little things that are great no matter what (a great hair day, a cup of fantastic coffee, petting an adorable puppy), then your depression may be something you’ll need treatment for, with therapy and possibly pills.

      It sounds like you’re not enjoying the things you feel you should, which is a sign that you should seek help, regardless of whether it’s “normal” in your situation or not. There’s nothing wrong with going to a therapist for a couple of sessions to help you through a hard time! Lots of people need help adjusting after big changes, and it doesn’t mean you’re sick or broken, just in need of a little help. Try therapy before pills, though. Our medical system tends to overmedicate, and while there’s nothing wrong with needing the chemical help, medicine won’t help you learn how to cope with life changes in the future, and therapy might.

      • Bumps in the Road

        You described perfectly what I’m feeling — that I’m not enjoying the things I should.

        Thank you all for your advice — now any advice on how to find a therapist (Houston if anyone has suggestions)? My usual method of finding something is Yelp or asking coworkers, and this isn’t the kind of thing I want to mention to coworkers. But the idea of yelping a therapist seems a bit wrong…

        • Nonny

          You’ve had great advice so far but I just want to add something based on my own experience.

          I’ve dealt with situational depression that was quite similar to what you describe. I probably should have gone to a therapist, but I never did (I thought about it a lot). But I recognized the fact that I was depressed and decided I needed to reset my brain. I noticed I was looking at every.single.thing in the most negative, depressing light. I started forcing myself to see the positive sides of things. It took a while and was really difficult at first but it really helped me. That, coupled with forcing myself to do things out of my comfort zone and just generally taking good care of myself (including getting outside for fresh air and sunlight, and getting regular exercise), really helped me to get through the situation and through to the other side. (I still think a therapist would have helped me, though.)

          Good luck. Take care of yourself.

        • anonz

          Stacy Lanier in West U comes highly reccomended. Good luck and hope you are feeling better soon.

    • mascot

      I had post-partum, which my therapist explained as partly the work of hormones and partly the work of having a hard time adjusting to this new role in my life. We started medication and therapy around the same time because I frankly wanted to start a bunch of solutions rolling at once. Once the medication got me back to a baseline, I was in a better place to work on the techniques that we were discussing in therapy. I stopped medication eventually, but by that point, the tools I got from the therapy session were all that I needed. So, I agree with the advice to just treat medication as another tool in getting better.

    • Brooklyn Paralegal

      “Or is it wrong somehow to use medicine as a crutch to get over bumps in the road?”

      Absolutely NOT. Meds aren’t for everyone, but there is absolutely nothing wrong needing medication to offset depression.

      My therapist explained to me a few years ago when I was considering medication that sometimes we’re way over our heads in deep water and medication is a tool that helps us regain our footing so we can begin to wade to shore. Needing medication now–or at any point–does not necessarily mean you’ll need medication forever. I agree with mascot and other above that medication can be a very useful tool in taking care of yourself and in getting better.

      • SFBayA

        That’s a great metaphor. I also think of meds as crutches to help you walk around while your broken leg heals. Some people don’t need crutches, some do. Once your leg heals, you don’t need the crutches anymore. Some people’s legs never heal quite right, or there’s too much damage so the leg can’t heal fully, so those people may need crutches permanently, and that’s ok too. Therapists and meds were what I needed. After about a year, my mental “leg” healed, I went off the crutches i.e. meds for several years and felt good. Then I had a very stressful time which resulted in my mental “leg” getting hurt again, so I need crutches/meds to walk around again. I’m totally ok with owning that about myself. I hate the stigma against getting help for mental illness.

        You also mentioned you’d probably been depressed before. People who have been depressed before, like me, are far more likely to be depressed again sometime in the future, like me. I suspect I will get postpartum when that time comes … yay… but what can I say… I have an imperfect “leg” that’s prone to getting hurt and needing help to heal.

        • Brooklyn Paralegal

          +1 for refusing the stigma about seeking treatment for mental illness

          I was diagnosed with an eating disorder in my late teens and struggled with it throughout college and the year after. I finally sought treatment (intensive therapy) and really committed myself to it, which was so phenomenally helpful to me. Unfortunately, a great deal of people around me at the time (no longer friends of mine for obvious reasons) were really judgmental and couldn’t understand why I didn’t feel a ton of shame about seeking therapy when I could have “just eaten a sandwich”.

          I no longer see my therapist because I got to the point where I internalized the things we worked on together so that I could deconstruct all the myths about being thin I had built up in my head, but I have her number in my phone and if I ever feel like I’m losing my footing, I can always call her. I know that seeing her is a big part of what got me here (healthy and happy) today, and I feel no shame in that.

          My experience is that women are so often characterized as “hysterical”, and so women that seek treatment for mental illness are seen as reifying that notion, and I absolutely refuse to partake in that.

  18. cbackson

    Ladies, whenever I go to the hair salon, the stylist uses a straightening iron on my (already straight) hair as part of the process of making it look all fabulous and blown out. I am constantly unhappy with my hair (which I would like to be sleek and shiny rather than slightly frizzy). Would home use of a straightening iron assist me in achieving greater hair satisfaction? If so, any tips on how to learn how to use one? Other than hot rollers and blow dryers, I don’t know much about heat tools.

    • Orangerie

      Invest in a good flat iron so you don’t burn your hair. I swear by the Sedu tourmaline one (not the revolution, just the regular version). Actually, all of Sedu’s hair appliances are great and you can pick them up for a good deal on Folica.com.

      Since your hair is pretty straight already, I’d keep the heat towards the middle of the range and just lightly run over the front sections and your ends to eliminate frizz. Going over the same section several times will just flatten out your hair. A good lightweight serum might also help achieve a smoother look.

      • OHCFO

        +1 on the high quality iron. I have an FHI iron I bought from my stylist. Cost about $150. My hair has some natural wave and is not otherwise damaged, so I use it all the way up at the 450 degree setting for best effect. It is night and day compared to the cheapo flat iron I had from Target years ago. Worth every penny. I don’t use it every day, but it seems like every time I do, I get compliments from people about how sleek and smooth it is. Go for it!

      • Brooklyn Paralegal

        +1 to Sedu. I was using a Chi before that, which is pretty good, but the Sedu is so amazing. Heats up super quickly and does a fantastic job.

        Just be sure to use some kind of heat protection serum or spray so you don’t totally fry your hair. Much as I love my straightener and my curling iron, repeated exposure to heat can take a toll on your hair.

    • nycanon

      yes – but buy a good one! I had a chi for years that was great. Now I have a solano and like it even better. Have not had good luck with the less expensive drugstore variety. They key for me is to work in very small sections (takes forever because I have thick hair) and afterwards I work a dab of john frieda frizz-ease through my hair. I, too, cannot achieve the sleek, straight look just from blow drying, so the straightener has been a godsend for me.

    • AnonInfinity

      Yes! And I’d recommend using a product before flat ironing it. My hairdresser told me that I always have to put a product on my hair before using the flat iron because the product acts as a buffer layer. I use and LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE Moroccan Oil, but I have curly hair. I’m not sure if it would make straight hair look oily (maybe someone else can weigh in on this point).

      • Woods-comma-Elle

        Yes re the product. Apparently the iron ‘burns’ the product and leaves your hair untouched. Some people swear by using hairspray like this (ie the iron burns through the hairspray) but there are loads of excellent flat-iron sprays specifically designed for heat protection.

        This reminds me that I need to replace my flatiron and makes me realise not having a good one and never using the crap one is probably the source of my current hair dissatisfaction.

      • JJ

        I have naturally slightly wavy hair that I blow dry and then iron straight and I also love, love, love Moroccan Oil. It’s the only product out there that makes my hair shiny and less frizzy without looking greasy or flat. I’ve tried a lot of the argan oil products out there, and Moroccan Oil works the best for me, by far.

        • Sheath lover

          Is that the brand name? Where do you buy it? How do you apply it?

          I want to try this but for whatever reason it totally confuses me.

          • JJ

            That’s the brand name. I bought mine on Amazon, but maybe other websites have it (my Ulta and Sephora do not carry it). It comes with a pump attachment. For my slightly-past shoulder length hair, I put two pumps in the palm of my hand, rub my hands together, and then run through my wet hair. I take a little care not to put any near the crown of my head to make sure that I don’t get any greasy streaks, but otherwise, it’s really easy.

    • Pippi

      If you have straight hair, you can buy any cheapo one at Target. The expensive, higher-heat ones are for people with more curl. I blow-dry and then run a straightening iron through afterward to smooth is out, but I already have very straight hair.

    • Sheath lover

      Yes! A straightening iron is key to this and super easy to use. Hot curlers are totally beyond me and I can straighten my super-duper think hair to make it sleek in like ten minutes in the morning. I was struggling with how other professional women really make their hair look “done” since mine when left to its own devices has a million cowlicks and this is totally the answer.

      I just flip my hair and blowdry it really quickly (5-7 minutes) until it’s like 90% dry. Then I stop, brush it out and let it “sit” while I do my makeup (another 5-7 minutes) and then comb my hair into shape and run the straight iron through it. For whatever reason, having my hair rest for five minutes between hair drying and flat ironing really seems to make the flat ironing process go faster and improves the results. When I do those two right after another my hair is too wet or something and it takes longer to get worse results.

      I was nervous about trying the flat iron since I a have very limited hair/makeup skills so I just bought the remington wet/dry flat iron that was recommended on this site to start with. It was like $25 or something. I like it so much that I haven’t bothered to upgrade to a really pricey flat iron, but I probably will if this one bites the dust.

      Others have said that they could use this flat iron directly on wet hair and it would work, but I’ve tried repeatedly with zero results. I think my hair is just too think.

      • Sheath lover

        Yes, I also have pretty straight hair, it just tends to have a mind of its own. I swear I could just be sitting at my desk typing away and when I get up to use the rest room one whole side of my head is totally jacked up/knotted, like little kid style. I have no idea how this happens.

        Flat ironing plus reminding myself to brush it at least once during the day has really calmed the hair crazies.

  19. Green Lamp

    I am depressed and in major need of sleep. I am ~7 weeks pregnant with #2. At work, with my stockings cutting into my belly (I just cut the waistband but still), no work on my desk, nothing to do. All I want is to curl up in bed and SLEEP. Food doesn’t interest me and I feel nauseated so often I have Zofran in my purse. I am tiredtiredTIRED and I want to SLEEP!!! I am not going back to school this semester, instead looking for a job and may change careers because law probably won’t pay enough. Am feeling depressed, maybe. I don’t know how I’ll manage with baby #2…it’ll work out but I don’t like instability in my life right now. DH is looking for a job most likely out of state and our whole support network is in this state. GRRRRR.
    This vent will probably continue.

    Thanks for reading and your sympathy.

    • OHCFO

      You need a hug. And a nap! My 2 are 16 months apart. The early days with #2 were sooooooo hard. But they really did get better, and I was a champ at mid-late pregnanacy because I wasn’t afraid of my shadow like I was with #1 (thinking everything I felt was “bad”, always worrying that I wasn’t doing it “right,” etc.)

      I also moved cross country and changed careers during my pregnancy with #2, so I know how hard that can be. After #2 came and I’d survived all the turmoil, parenting 2 kiddos wasn’t so bad. You’ll do great.

      • Green Lamp

        When I got home this evening I napped for an hour with baby1…things are looking up now. Thank you for the hug and encouragement!

  20. Small bag needed -- cluch for daytime?

    My tote-style purse is killing my shoulders / neck (my computer-based desk job isn’t helping, either). I’d like to get a clutch over a wristlet, but I don’t want something that seems too evening (what seems to be the problem with clutches I’ve seen). And I agree with some posters who have found some wristlets too high school. Can anyone recommend anything to hold a blackberry / work ID / wallet-type items (I’m thinking of downsizing out of a perfectly good wallet even).

    All that I think of that might work is a the Coach zip wallet, but has anyone actually used one and can comment on what it might hold / heaviness / ease of use / other concerns?

    The tote is pretty, but it will have to be for weekends when I can drive it around in my car :)

  21. Timeforchange

    So I get phone calls and emails from legal recruiters regularly. How do I tell who is legit though?

    • B

      yelp.

      there was one email with something that piqued my interest but when i yelped the person who emailed, i found horrible stories about their business practices.

  22. Clarisonic help!

    I noticed the NAS has the Clarisonic Mia on sale for a reasonable price. I am considering buying it. I am almost 30 (eek, I can’t believe I just wrote that!), and have sensitive, acne-prone skin. I didn’t have problematic skin until after law school (hello, stress) and the low dose antibiotics I’ve been prescrived over the past two years haven’t really helped. I’d appreciate hearing any insight into whether it’s worth the splurge. Thanks!

    • Alice

      No insight, but in basically the same boat and looking forward to responses. Also, Mia vs. Mia 2? I’m trying to decide if the case/2 speeds justifies a higher price for the Mia 2….

    • L

      Love it. My skin hasn’t looked this good ever and I don’t even remember the last time I had a pimple. I have the regular Mia.

    • Month 2

      I’ve been using the Mia 2 for about 2 months now. It clearly evened out my face texture and my chest has never been clearer. My arms are still breaking out though. I’m also about 30 and this has been a lifelong problem for me, overall I’m like 80% happy.

      On topic: my brush head is starting to smell funky even though I regularly clean it because it never really seems to dry between uses. Any advice?

    • Calico

      Do it! I bought mine a couple of months ago and it’s made a huge difference in regards to acne. If I ever get lazy and forget to wash my face at night, using the Clarisonic really brightens up my skin and clears the pores.

      • Clarisonic help!

        One more question: do you just use your regular face wash with it? Thanks for all of the helpful responses!

        • L

          Yup. I use my paula’s choice (I know I sound like a thissite fan girl) and occasionally a light exfoliating scrub.

        • Joanna Toews

          As long as your facewash is unabrasive and not super drying, it should be fine. The vibrations get the facewash waaaaay in there. I’ve switched to Cetaphil cleanser, but your mileage may vary.

          I’ve adapted the skincare routine from Acne (.) org…
          – Clarisonic Mia with Cetaphil cleanser; rinse
          – Benzol Peroxide all over; let it dry
          – Moisturize

          Works like a charm. I very rarely have even an isolated pimple anymore, much less a breakout. Complete 180 from a year and a half ago.

          • Veronique

            I have a similar routine:
            -Cerave moisturizing cleanser (like it a little better than Cetaphil)
            -Epiduo (prescription benzyl peroxide with retinol)
            -Cetaphil moisturizer mixed with a little glycerin (summer) or rosehip seed oil (winter)

            It definitely took time for my skin to adjust to the Epiduo (burning! irritation!) but my skin is finally looking great! I definitely have to use a more moisturizing cleanser. Switching from Purpose to Cerave drastically reduced my side effects. I used to use the regular brush head, but now use the acne or sensitive heads, since acne medications make my skin more dry (but still oily!) and sensitive.

    • Rosacea

      Has anyone with Rosacea used the the Clarosonic? What has your experience been? I am afraid that my skin may be too sensitive to use the Clarosonic.

      • Joanna Toews

        I do, I do, me me me!

        I use the gentlest brush (“delicate”). The vibrations do most of the work, not the bristles.

    • S

      I used Philosophy’s Purity Made Simple soap with mine. I used to be a regular user and sing it’s praises all the time. But to be honest, my Clarasonic has sat in a drawer for a better part of a year now. I don’t know if I wasn’t rinsing well enough after or what, but an old wash cloth (nubby) seems to work better. (I know, I know–what no one wants to hear.)

  23. TJ

    Pantyhose question:

    I know everyone doesn’t wear it, but I’d like some help with lunchtime rush pantyhose buying.

    What shade/brand is good for lighter Indian skintone? Nude is too pale and I don’t want sheer black. Brown might work but that’s a bit uncommon to find.

    • downstream

      if you’re near a department store, I love Calvin Klein hose and I think they have a “mocha” color that might work.

    • Pippi

      I think Penney’s store brand has some in the middle “nude” shades. I think drugstore brands also usually have a wider shade range, but that probably depends on your location. L’eggs used to, maybe they still do.

      • Hollis

        I like Sheer Energy (or other L’Eggs) hose, and the suntan shade might work best for you, although the nude color is not that light and might work, too.

    • Anonymous

      this is a big reason why I don’t wear them!

      the sheerer the better, because your natural shade will show through and overshadow any weird coloring.

  25. Aria

    I need my parents to watch my cat for a month and my father is freaking out that the cat will scratch his leather sofa. Apart from getting the cat’s claws trimmed frequently while he’s on vacation with my parents, anyone have any suggestions on something that we could put on the sofas to protect them? My mom read that if you cover everything in aluminum foil it will stop cats from getting on furniture, but that seems like a ridiculous solution for an entire month. Any ideas?

    • just Karen

      There are repellent sprays that you could use that are supposed to deter the cat, but it’s hit or miss as to whether they work with any particular cat. I think your best bet would be buying the little rubber tips that can be glued on the cat’s nails – they are a pain to keep up with long term, but I think they’d be well worth it for a month.

    • L

      The hate foil, but they could put it out far enough so the cat can’t scratch at the couch (they won’t walk over it). The other thing they make are these claw tips that you glue over there claws so they can’t scratch hard and hurt things. If you google it or my cat from hell you’ll find them. Finally, put a desirable scratching object near anything you don’t want scratched. Catnip it up.

    • Nonny

      This may be cat-specific, but in my experience cats don’t particularly like leather furniture and don’t scratch it or sit on it.

      But if it is really an issue, could the cat just not be allowed to go in that room?

    • PHX

      soft paws dot com — they are plastic tips that are glued onto a cat’s claws. Love them. (Plus they come in colors!)

      • Anonymous

        My mom has a cat and a leather couch, and she sets it up so the cat stays in a separate room (with his litter box, food, water, and a scratch post) with the door closed when she’s not home. Then when she’s home, she lets him out of his room and just makes sure to supervise him closely. At night when everyone’s sleeping, he goes back in his room (which is actually a spare bedroom that has a half-bath attached, so it’s a fairly large space). Maybe that could work?

      • Aria

        Thanks for all the advice everyone! Now I’m so excited to try out these plastic tips and give my black male cat red fingernails!

    • big dipper

      Not sure what the lay out of your parents house is like (obviously), but can you just gate off the room with leather furniture? My aunt and uncle have a “cat free” room in their house where they simply keep the door closed. If there’s no door, you could invest in a pet gate that could keep the cat out of there temporarily.

    • B

      With a leather couch and 2 cats who don’t actually “scratch” the sofa… if they even so much as run across, or are sitting on the couch but then get startled and run or decide to chase each other, there will be holes. Not from intentional scratching, but from jumping off.

      Maybe with a single cat it won’t be an issue since there is no chasing, but I wanted to throw that out there.

      • Aria

        Yeah, my current leather furniture is a little scratched just from my cat waking up from a nap and stretching. He doesn’t mean to scratch it, but with his claws it just sort of happens.

  26. Trying to Plan

    I got married about 6 months ago. I’m on birth control pills, and I have been since I was 18. I’m 32 now.

    My DH and I are planning to start conceiving in about a year. We are trying to plan for things now, like saving money, deciding whether to move into a new house, whether I want to continue in my current job, etc.

    Since I have been on the pill for so long, I’m worried my body won’t remember very well how to do a menstrual cycle. I went off the pill in my 20s for about 6 months, and had 1 period only. My friend also told me recently that she went off the pill and her cycles weren’t regular for 18 months. If that’s going to happen to me, I should stop hormonal BC now.

    We went to Planned Parenthood last night to ask about whether we should use some other form of birth control instead of hormonal, to give my cycles time to readjust. Condoms aren’t really ideal. It was the last appointment of the day, and the nurse practitioner was very confused. I think she is just used to seeing much younger women trying to prevent pregnancy, not couples in their 30s asking about ways to get pregnant, a year in advance. She was a little snarky and didn’t really give us much useful advice. (I was kind of disappointed. I’ve been getting my annuals at PP for a long time – they are so judgment free!)

    I’m reading Taking Charge of Your Fertility, which was recommended by other commenters on here. Is there anything I’m missing? What would you have liked to have known a year before you got pregnant (or started trying)?

    • Anne Shirley

      Aside from condoms, have you considered a copper IUD or diaphragm? I’m roughly in your situation (not married yet, but want kids fairly soon) and I’m just using condoms. Not sure what your issues are with them, but they’ve been great for the not-quite-ready but would be happy with a baby stage for me and my gardener.

      • Merabella

        I have a copper IUD, but am considering getting it out soon as DH and I are getting closer to ttc. Having read Taking Charge of Your Fertility – I think that the family planning method and non-hormonal methods used together can be really effective. Also, we have gotten to the point where if we happened to get pregnant on accident we would just roll with it because it would only be slightly off our “schedule.” And from what I’ve read, it is harder to get pregnant than we have been lead to believe – so it may take longer than you anticipated.

        Considering that you have been on BC for a while, and you had issues resuming your cycle normally when you went off it in the past I would say an earlier rather than later plan of action would suit you better in the long run. You can get off BC and give it a few months to see if you start ovulating again, and then take the next step from there.

    • Susie

      Are you currently on a pill/schedule where you still have a monthly period? If so, the adjustment tends to be pretty quick. I’ve had a few friends get pregnant within one month after coming off the pill.

    • Anonymous

      FWIW, I got pregnant in two cycles off the pill. I’m 36 and was on the pill continuously for 18 years. If you don’t want to get pregnant now, I would stay on the pill or go off and use a condom. I wouldn’t start another method of non-condom contraception now (IUD or whatever).

      Several people I know went off the pill “early” to “get it out of their system” and ended up pregnant right afterwards. The thing about fertility and pregnancy is that you don’t really know until you try and you can’t really try until you are ready.

      • Jo March

        This. Granted, I was only on the Pill for about 18m this time around, but Im 37 and was off for less than 3 months, and just not *not-trying* when I got pregnant!

      • anonforthis

        You people make me want to tear my hair out. I wish it worked that way for everyone!

        • Anonymous

          I’m not sure what part of “I” and “several people I know” made you think that I was suggesting it worked that way for everyone.

          Of course everyone is different. Which is why you don’t really know until you know.

        • anonforthis

          Sorry, didn’t mean to imply I thought you were suggesting it worked that way for everyone. I am just jealous that it does not.

          • Anon

            anonforthis – just for the record, I read it the same way you did and totally knew what you meant.

      • anne-on

        In conjunction with taking charge of your fertility I used ovulation monitor sticks. I went off BC about 6 months before we really started trying and was pregnant on month 2 of trying thanks to charting. I was on BC for about 10 years prior to this so no problem with getting it out of my system.

    • EB0220

      When I was in your situation, my doctor’s only suggestion was condoms. You could probably get away with using them for only about a week each cycle if you are willing to chart your cycle a la TCOYF. For what it’s worth, it doesn’t always take that long for cycles to normalize once you stop taking the pill. I had been taking it for about 8 years when we decided to TTC. It only took 2 cycles for things to normalize, which was amazing to me, because I had very irregular cycles prior to starting BC when I was a teenager.

    • anonforthis

      I’ve never used it myself but it sounds like Natural Family Planning would be ideal for your situation.

      Also, the toughest thing about this is that you cannot plan. For everyone who got pregnant immediately after going off the pill, there is someone who did not. It takes 6-8 months of trying (on average) to get pregnant. I wish we had started trying sooner as well, although we did end up on the shorter end of average.

      • Small bag needed -- cluch for daytime?

        I would second NFP. It will help you really take charge of things and be on top of things not normalizing right away (with no interference from other BC methods involving hormones). The P is insightful — you can plan to avoid or you can plan to have and the learning will benefit you in any event.

      • Bonnie

        I know too many people who unintentionally had kids while using NFP. It’s not very effective.

          • Anon nfp

            I found NFP to be very effective in understanding how my body works and used it to *get* pregnant (4x after age 37 — I got a late start and didn’t feel that I had a minute to wait).

            I understand that YMMV, but I am a bit astonished at this.

          • Bonnie

            From the NIH: Of 100 couples who use natural family planning methods each year,
            anywhere from 1 to 25 will become pregnant. Natural family
            planning can be an effective type of birth control if all three methods
            are used and if all are always used correctly. I would not call 25% failure rate effective. NFP is great for trying to get pregnant, not for avoiding it.

          • G

            Ok, anecdotal, but I’ve charted over 100 cycles on TCOYF for birth control, either abstaining or using condoms during the brief “fertile period” in the middle of the cycle, with no mishaps. It might not work for everybody, but it’s worth a shot if you want to get off hormonal bc. Just make sure you read the whole book and understand it!

          • Merabella

            In response to Bonnie:

            The NIH is probably taking into account all those people who use the “pull out” method – which isn’t effective. But if you are tracking your cycles using the methods in TCOYF I would think it would be highly effective.

            At the same time hormonal birth control is only effective if you take your pill everyday – consistency is key either way. Lazy family planning is rarely as effective as constant vigilance.

          • KLG

            I have no experience with any birth control except the pill and condoms, but a fabulous gynecologist I used to see had a poster in all of the exam rooms that showed the advertised rate of pregnancy prevention (99% effective for the pill) for all the different types of birth control vs. the “as typically used” rate of pregnancy prevention. Almost all types of birth control had HUGE failure rates as typically used because of people not using them exactly as they were supposed to. It was really eye opening.

        • Brahbrah

          Another anecdote: I’ve been using NFP/FAM successfully for almost 7 years to avoid pregnancy.

    • lucy stone

      I went off the pill earlier this year to give myself time to regulate before we started trying. I’m still not ready yet, which is a whole different problem, but my body is. All my cycles have been 32 days except one. I think that one was longer because I transited every time zone in the US. I’d encourage you to use the charting method from TCOYF for the first few cycles and if you are “regular” then that will give you a good idea of where your body is at…just make sure you use a barrier method until you’re ready!

    • Diana Barry

      I would go off the pill now. Read TCOYF and start temping, use c*nd*ms etc until you get the hang of it/can go without, or not (a year is honestly not that long).

      For me, I didn’t get a period for 1.5 years after going off the pill – we had to do fertility workup and clomid to get me started again – but then have been regular since having my kids. Given that you went off the pill once before and were irregular, it is probably worth it to go off now and start getting used to your cycle (if you get one) so that you are ready/in the best place to TTC when you want to.

    • NYC

      I went off BC about 6 months before we pulled the goalie. My period came back right away, but I was always fairly regular. I got a diaphragm from my ob/gyn. I didn’t love it, so we ended up using condoms for most of that time. Agree they aren’t ideal, but they do prevent you from getting pregnant. And then when you stop using them, it is pretty awesome.

    • another preg anon

      I went off BC when we were ready to start trying and didn’t get my period for like 5 months. Turns out I had PCOS and had to use fertility drugs to ovulate. It all worked out in the end (my husband has super duper swimmers and we got pregnant the first month I ovulated) but it was not easy and I wish I had gone off BC sooner so I could have been diagnosed sooner.

      That said, tons of women get off BC and get pregnant that month.

      I would stop taking BC and use condoms and try to figure out your cycle, whether you ovulate, when you ovulate, etc. You might be using condoms for an extra six months but to me it would be worth it to know more about my body.

    • yet another preg anon

      Be careful – while I understand your logic and your concern about regular cycles, it can actually go in the opposite direction. My doctor told me to use condoms for few months after coming off the pill because your body tends to OVER ovulate – potentially resulting in twins. Before you went on the pill, were your cycles regular? That’s probably the best indicator of whether you’ll have regular cycles post-pill.

      • Trying to Plan

        OP here. When I started the pill, I was quite young, and I don’t honestly remember whether I was precisely regular or not. I do remember that once when I went off I didn’t have a period for 6 months. It freaked me out.

        I think over-ovulation would be ok if I went off the pill tomorrow, since we’d use condoms for the next year.

        Our only concern with condoms is that it’s not as fun for DH.

    • Anonymous

      When I went of bc (for similar reasons), we used the pull-out method. It’s not foolproof, but we didn’t have a problem (we waited a year, too). We were comfortable with an oops, but wanted to skew things in our favor. Since you guys are thinking of having kids soon, you might be in the same boat. You could also try natural family planning, but that might be dicier in terms of your chance of accidental pregnancy.

    • bizzyb

      I was also on hormonal birth control for a long time, from 17 until 35. Last year I went off it for a few months because I was curious about the same thing — what would my normal cycles be like? My cycle settled into 28-29 days like clockwork, with no issues except that I’d forgotten what it felt like to have normal period cramps and a heavier flow! I went back on the pill after a few months because the condoms annoyed me.

      This year we opted to try for a pregnancy, and I went off bc in March. Pregnant by May.

  27. Hollis

    Getting off the pill – by itself – should not mess up your cycles. In fact, when people have irregular cycles and are ttc, my ob/gyn recommends that you actually go on the pill for a few months and get off in order to regulate it. Lots of people get pregnant on the first try after they stop (or get pregnant because they miss a few pills).

    Unsolicited advice alert – if you don’t mind me saying, I wish I had started sooner to conceive because it took a year each time. It sounds like you and your husband would welcome a child and you’ll have 9 months to save, figure out where to live, etc. if you have health insurance, why not remove the goalie now and see how things pan out? i had this idea that i would pick a month to start conceiving and it would happen right away and when it didn’t have for months at a time, it made me anxious and depressed. so, to answer your question, i wish i had known that it would take so long each time, because then i would have started trying earlier and would not have waited for the “perfect time.”

    • Ciao, pues

      I second the unsolicited advice here. When the husband and I decided we were ready to start trying I was 30. By the time we actually have our first kid, I’ll be 32. I didn’t realize it at the time, but our thoughts on “ready to start trying” were actually more like “ready to have a kid like right now, as in now,” and it was really disappointing and frustrating for the months to tick by without a successful pregnancy. I blame it on a culture of instant gratification and the sea of underage relatives i have that “accidentally” get pregnant if they so much as look at a pen*s. It can take a long time to have a baby. If you want to have a kid next year, you should start trying now. If you truly don’t want to have a kid for another two years or more, then it makes sense to wait to start trying.

      • Trying to Plan

        OP here.

        I appreciate all the advice! I know my body (and heart) are ready, but my marriage is only a few months old, so we are still getting to know each other as a husband and wife.

        I love the unsolicited advice, and everything else. It sounds like everyone is just different, and I won’t know how my body is going to go until I finish my pill pack and don’t start another one.

        Even thinking about this process is exciting – my DH is super excited with me, and he’s started thinking about his genealogy. It’s adorable. I know he’ll be a great dad. :)

        • Ciao, pues

          Good luck to you, OP! It really is different for everyone. The most important part is that you and your signif are on the same page, and love and support each other. It sounds like you’ve got that in the bag. Congratulations on your recent marriage and have fun “trying” or “not-trying,” wherever you land!

  28. Anonymous

    For those who are interested – Royal Baby Name was announced as George Alexander Lewis [Cambridge, I presume]

    • NOLA

      No, not Cambridge. Although William, at some point, used “William Wales” as a pseudonym, the family name is Mountbatten-Windsor.

      • Small bag needed -- cluch for daytime?

        And I think that that is an Anglicized version of “Battenburg”

        All this make me think it’s time for a Tudors bender :)

        • TBK

          I think they actually don’t have last names. The boys used Mountbatten-Windsor in school because it was weird administratively to have students with no last name. (Don’t ask me why I know this.)

  29. KAG

    Does anyone have any problem opening up the links when using google chrome? They just sit as
    click.synergy…..” I tried opening the links in explorer, but that didn’t work either. Should I be doing something else?

Back to Top

About

Work with Corporette®

Serious Stuff

work fashion blog press mentions