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Updated: Feb 4, 2021 170 Comments · by

Coffee Break: Cultured Pearl & Diamond Station Necklace

Coffee Break· The Personal Shopper (TPS) |

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I was browsing jewelry recently and this gorgeous pearl and diamond necklace caught my eye. At $9,600 it's definitely a milestone sort of necklace — but it's the sort of thing you'd pass down to your kids or grandkids.

I think it would be fabulous with a monotone outfit, or, hey, any turtleneck or dress where you want a long, round necklace.

(Psst: super old but here's Kanye's guide to pearls!)

Looking for something similar but, ahem, a bit less? These options are all under $100: Kendra Scott, Halogen, Nordstrom, and another Halogen.

Sales of note for 9.30.24

Sales of note for 9.30.24

And some of our latest threadjacks here at Corporette (reader questions and commentary) — see more here!

Some of our latest threadjacks include:

About Kat

Kat Griffin is the founder, publisher, and editor-in-chief of Corporette. You can read more about her here.

Comments

  1. Anon

    I’m an introvert with very few friends, but I do have one female friend who I have become fairly close to over the past year. We are doing a Galentine’s gift exchange this year with takeout and drinks/movie/talking at my place on the Saturday night before Valentine’s Day. I’ve been wondering if there are any fun 2-person party games we could play. Any recommendations? I always see party type card games at Target, Barnes & Noble etc, but I don’t know anything about them or how to play.

    • Senior Attorney

      I don’t know that this is a party game, but my husband and I enjoy Codenames Duet.

      • Cat

        Was just about to comment this.

        Also, dominos, Monopoly Deal (though the latter is a bit more fun in a group of 3-4)

    • Abby

      Maybe a little more nerdy, but I am currently obsessed with Blokus. You can play 2 people if you both play 2 colors. Also you can play ticket to ride with 2 people!

    • Winter

      Exploding unicorns has two person modified directions. Plus: Yahtzee is always an oldie but goodie.

      • Charlotte

        Second Monopoly Deal and Codenames Duet. Also recommend Sequence, which you can play two or three player or any multiple of either.

  2. Anon

    For those who are attorneys/work in management what system/program/app do you use to help keep track of the items that you delegate to others? I’m a senior associate. I have a great system of lists in OneNote that I use to keep track of my own action items and followups, but I struggle to keep track of the items and pieces that I delegate to more junior associates, paralegals and other staff. I’ve tried the reminder system in Outlook and I hate the way it is organized. I don’t want to see a deadline based list, more of a reminder of what all I assigned to who and when.

    • Sloan Sabbith

      I use my own to-do list on OneNote, add a line below the task I need someone else to do, tab in once, write who I delegated it to and date and then add a tag to both the to-do and the delegated line so I can search by tag later. I use the tag that looks like a person with lines next to it and tagged it “delegate.”

    • anonshmanon

      I don’t know if Outlook has a feature like this, but in gmail, I use the snooze and schedule email functions a lot for stuff like this. If I delegate something via email and want to follow up in a week, I snooze the email convo for that time, so it pops to the top of my inbox after and reminds me to follow up. Sometimes there is no email, or its just a deadline or reminder for myself, so I write an email to myself, which I then schedule to be sent at a certain time. I don’t know how this would integrate with your OneNote, but my system is very much based on my inbox, so it works for that.

      • Anon

        This. Save yourself grief with systems.not designed for this, and try Trello.

    • Anonymous

      I use Smartsheet. You can add your project timeline and then set reminder emails to go out to different folks as things are coming due. (Like my team will get a “Smarthseet notice, project X deadline in 1 week” email without me needing to send it myself. You also can give access to the sheet so they can check off when things are completed or leave notes on progress. They even have project templates pre-designed so you just adapt however needed. I’m not very tech-y but it’s super easy to use. I know it also has the capability to auto adjust–like if deadline x is missed by 12 days you can set it up so every due date after that action item automatically adjusts 12 days (that’s more sophisticated than I use it for but I have peers who do this).

    • Nesprin

      If you like one note, microsoft teams is a decent multiuser equivalent- there’s a tasks board and you can set deadlines etc, and you can have one note pages within teams. But because it is microsoft, there’s no import from one note to teams function.

  3. busybee

    Has anyone ever gotten money back from FedEx due to delayed packages? My insurance required that I get a medication through a mail order pharmacy. The pharmacy shipped it on time and it was due to arrive 2/1. It’s now 2/4 and it’s been sitting in the distribution center for over 24 hours.It is very time sensitive and I cannot skip a dose. I’ve made multiple calls to FedEx and gotten nowhere. I am able to get the medication locally for $290 per vial. This is a lot of money for me. Is there any recourse? I’ll be out at least $1000 because FedEx can’t get my time-sensitive medication two miles from their delivery center to my house. They will not allow me to go to the center myself because they don’t even know if it’s definitely there.

    • Anonymous

      I feel your pain. When this happened to me, I called the specialty pharmacy and asked them to arrange a courier from FedEx. They were resistant, but made it happen (twice). Have you tried calling the pharmacy and getting pushy?

      • Sloan Sabbith

        Sometimes you can get the pharmacy to call FedEx and get them to do their job, too. They don’t really want to have to re-ship you out the meds, especially if they have to eat the cost.

        I would also just show up at the FedEx warehouse if you can, even if they say it’s not there. They may not release it to you, but it would definitely annoy them enough to get them to deal with it to get rid of you.

    • Anon

      I would expect they might refund you the cost of shipping but I really doubt they’ll pay you for your other expenses.

    • Anon

      This is something your insurance company should be responsible for (e.g. they should cover the cost of the replacement meds due to circumstances beyond your control). Have you reached out to the insurer?

      • busybee

        That’s a good idea. I hadn’t considered reaching out to insurance but I will do that. Thank you!

        • Digby

          My employer uses Express Scripts, and Express Scripts will authorize anywhere from a 10-day to a 14-day supply, usually free or with just a copay, to be picked up at the local pharmacy in cases like this. Your plan/your employer may vary, but all of the pharmacy managers must be dealing with mail delays these days, so they probably have some solution.

    • nuqotw

      Call your doctor and see if s/he has any free samples. Spouse’s meds were delivered to the wrong address once upon a time. Pharmacy said they were delivered and wouldn’t ship another dose. Spouse called his doctor and got a free sample to hold him over.

    • Anonymous in Texas

      Ugh! I so feel your pain and I hate FedEx right now. Long story short, I stupidly left my work cell in a rental car. Avis found it and I had to pay to get it back – all fine. I paid $49 for overnight FedEx shipping but paid Avis, not FedEx. All this happened last Thursday around noon. My phone didn’t get picked up until Friday at 7:00 and b/c they don’t deliver on Saturday, I was supposed to get it on Monday before noon. I was able to track the phone using Find my iPhone. On Monday I watched it roam around the area where I live all day. At 6:00 when I still didn’t have it (note tracking said it would be delivered by noon) I called FedEx and they said the driver had until 8:00 to get it to me. At around 7:00 I watched it go in the opposite direction of my house, back to the FedEx facility. The next morning when I tracked it through FedEx, it said the driver tried to deliver it at 4:00 but no one was home….BS! I stayed home all day because I knew it was coming. I finally got it Tuesday at 6:00 pm. Since I paid Avis, not FedEx, I have no recourse. What really irked me was that when I called Customer Service, they blamed the delay on the Pandemic. I almost bit her head off b/c I told her that it was on a delivery truck at 7:40 am and the fact that I didn’t get it as promised at noon has nothing to do with the pandemic! Did you call FedEx and have them open a claim? I did that. You might be able to get something from them for this. When I talked to a “customer advocate” about my issue, they were apologetic and sympathetic. They offered me a credit to use at FedEx later, but I’ll neve use them again if I have a choice. So sorry this is happening to you.

    • Anon

      Work with the mail order pharmacy. They will understand as they’ve experienced this before and have a procedure. Call them soon, before 5 EST.

    • NW Islander

      This just happened with my poor dad. Can you pay the pharmacy for an emergency 3 day supply to tide you over?

  4. Anonymous

    Do all Mikimoto necklaces have that little “M” on them? It seems to really cheapen a nearly five-figure necklace…

    • Cat

      Ugh, I didn’t notice it until you pointed it out but I agree. (I’m also amused that 15 others were viewing the necklace at the same time. All fellow r-tt-s?)

    • Anon

      Reminds me of the Coach leather tag which was considered tacky and was always supposed to be removed. At some point it became socially acceptable (at least by some) to display the coach tag. I wonder if the M can be removed?

    • Anon

      Yes, it’s a logo thing.

      By the way, this necklace is way too expensive for what it is. Check out Kojima Pearl. You can get a full strand of tahitian pearls for less than this.

      • Anonymous

        I beg to differ, the Mikimoto pieces are really well made. Better than Tiffany.

        • Anon

          I also wouldn’t buy Tiffany. These are two brands that are insanely marked up due to name recognition.

      • anne-on

        Agreed. I swear by our local jeweler with an estate case because pearls are one of the first things people clear out. They are always well stocked with white pearls and you can re-string them easily.
        Tahitian Pearls ARE harder to find so I’m saving my pennies for a double strand of Tahitian’s Nancy Pelosi style….

    • Anonymous

      How rude, I love my Ms! But yes, they can be removed, they are just on a link.

    • Anonymous

      I am pretty sure they haven’t always (logo is engraved on the clasp, though), though it looks like everything on their website does now. Ugh, that’s a shame. Though I wonder if they’d remove it and restring it if you bought directly from them and asked.

  5. emeralds

    Struggling with Super Bowl menu planning this year–a lot of the things I’d usually make just seem like so much effort for two people. Ideas?

    • LaurenB

      Eat whatever you normally would that day? It’s not like SB is so important that you HAVE to make special foods. It’s not like it’s Thanksgiving where it’s not the same.

      • emeralds

        The SB is absolutely An Occasion for my husband, so actually in this household, we do make special food.

      • Anon

        You reminded me that I had an overseas intern working in my department this time of year a few years ago. We had to explain that Superbowl Sunday and the opening of Girl Scout Cookie season were both national holidays. Looking at the calendar, he expected groundhog day to be a bigger deal, but no.

        • Anonymous

          Oh, let’s resolve to make Groundhog Day a bigger thing! Furry hats, anyone?

          • Anonymous

            I worked for a newspaper in Woodstock, IL out of college and got to cover their Ground Hog Day festival. It is a BIG DEAL there. And there is a huge chili cook-off. I wish everyone would celebrate this way! (Man, I miss those days!)

    • Sloan Sabbith

      Fancy nachos! Easy to do for two people and it seems like good football food (IDK, I never watch the football, just eat the food).

      • emeralds

        Nachos are a great idea. Thanks!

        I am also more in it for the food and socialization than the actual football game. Might actually have to watch the game with my full attention this year? Weird.

        • Anonymous

          Ugh, no. Watch the Puppy Bowl instead! My football-hating teenager had a Puppy Bowl party last year and it was awesome.

          • emeralds

            I don’t mind watching football, it’s just not a sport I get wildly passionate about or actively seek out.

            Unfortunately the Puppy Bowl will not play in our house, unless we acquire a second television.

          • KS IT Chick

            Puppy Bowl starts playing several hours before kickoff, so you might get in some time with the adorable dogs before the game. Sadly, I won’t since we cut the cord last year and no longer have Animal Planet.

        • anonshmanon

          can you get a group text going with friends who would normally socialize over the game, so at least you can banter throughout the game with each other?

        • Anon

          We do “fusion nachos” using french fries as the base, with carnitas, cheese, salsa etc. built on from there.

      • Anon

        I’m in it for the ads and sometimes the halftime show. Like, I go around telling people Beyonce won the super bowl.

      • Anonymous

        Or frozen food, put a few of a bunch of different appetizers on a baking sheet and voila.

        • emeralds

          My brain added these two suggestions together and came up with Bagel Bites, which sound pretty freaking good at the moment. Thank you!

          • Anon

            you know what else is good, frozen chinese dumplings. Follow the package directions. I like the one where you put them in water, bring it to a boil, and then add a cup of cold water every time it starts to boil. They tell you exactly how many times to do this, and they come out perfect.

          • emeralds

            Ooh we do Trader Joe’s potstickers in the steamer basket pretty regularly, but I don’t think I’ve ever seen what you’re talking about. Will take a look!

        • cat socks

          My comment is in moderation, but the mini beef tacos from Trader Joes are really good.

    • Anonymous

      If you don’t love yourself enough to make yourself wings and quest how in the hellllllllll are you gonna love someone else?

      • emeralds

        My brain read that as “make yourself wings and [go on a] quest,” so thank you for the laugh.

        We are making wings! Should have mentioned that–it’s the only confirmed part of the menu.

      • Anonymous

        This made me laugh so hard I started choking. I’ve been watching Vikings and so the idea of going on these looting trips is stuck in my mind. ?

    • Shelle

      Pigs in a blanket: Crescent roll dough and cut up hot dogs. Veggie dogs for me, regular ones for my SO.

      • Anon

        mmm I use lil’ smokies instead of the cut up hot dogs. And they are delish. I cut the crescent roll dough into long triangles the width of the lil’ smokie. I like the turkey ones. I also put out little ramekins of different mustards to dip them in. Yum. Now I’m really hungry.

        • pugsnbourbon

          Team lil smokies here! I made approximately 40 of these for my wife and I this Christmas and I regret nothing.
          I have also made a (large) quantity of buffalo chicken dip for just us and I’d do it again.

    • KS IT Chick

      I am planning on two bite bierochs, plus a charcuterie platter from a local place. I usually try to have something sweet, too, so I may put together a batch of rum & eggnog rice krispy treats.

      Plus I have leftover bubbly for celebrating when the Chiefs #RunItBack!

      • emeralds

        My husband would agree with your suggestion, but I am a weirdo who hates the taste of brie!

      • Anonymous

        With jam! I forget what I usually top it with–I think it’s fig jam and pecans?

    • Friday

      Here’s what I’m making: crock pot buffalo chicken dip (low effort), Texas caviar (I make it all the time so low effort for me), peanut butter chocolate dipped pretzels (these are going to be a lot of effort but look fun to try). We’re going the neighbors’, otherwise I’d probably do air fryer wings, which are low effort as well.

      • emeralds

        Oh, two classics there. I’ve never made buffalo chicken dip before but I like it a lot, so this might be the year to give it a shot.

        I’m just going to be throwing wings in a couple marinades (teriyaki and…..something) and chucking them into the oven on a sheet pan. I’d love an air fryer but we don’t have space for one.

    • Anon

      I do roasted chicken wings (salt, roast at 425 turning once for about 45 minutes or until crisp, then toss with frank’s wing sauce or 1/2 butter 1/2 tabasco) along with celery and carrots and homemade bleu cheese dressing, which is just the hidden valley ranch packet + buttermilk + mayo + bleu cheese crumbles.

      Sometimes I make queso, the standard low rent way, which is what everyone likes best. It’s a block of velveeta and a can of rotel, melted slowly.

      Good dipping chips like the ones shaped like a bowl and we’re all set. We don’t drink a lot so no beer or anything.

      Did you know Superbowl Sunday is one of the top domestic violence days of the year?

      • Anon

        I forgot to mention deviled eggs. Very easy, high protein, cheap. And my family thinks they’re fancy. I mix the yolks with mayo, a tiny bit of salt, maybe some celery salt, and garnish with paprika. Fresh dill (tiny amount) if I have it. I don’t get too fancy with them. I also don’t have a piping bag. I just spoon the yolk mixture back into the whites with two spoons, like you would do drop cookies.

      • emeralds

        All classics, IMO. Velveeta and Rotel is in fact the correct way to make queso.

        I did know that stat. It’s unfortunate but does not surprise me, given the intersection of high emotions and large amounts of alcohol.

        • emeralds

          **Velveeta and Rotel is in fact the correct way to make queso for a Superbowl party, I should clarify. Not in all contexts.

          • Anon

            Haha. my Texan friend keeps telling me to add hot breakfast sausage but I’m afraid to mess it up. Once my family likes something, there’s a total revolt if I ever dare to change it.

          • Anonymous

            I have a friend who makes the velveeta + cream cheese + rotel + sausage and calls it “man dip” because all men love it.

          • Anonymous

            Yess!! Try it with Jimmy Deans! Sautée and the sausage first with some cumin—make sure to really breakup the chunks for maximum distribution. Then add the standard rol-tel and velveeta. Sooooo good!

        • Monday

          Woof. Maybe also the fact that among lots of events that involve men getting rowdy, it’s the only one usually spent at home. I am connecting this to the rising abuse reports that started during Covid lockdowns.

        • Anon

          I don’t know; I switched to blending real cheese with the warmed up rotel can juice and have never looked back. Somehow the texture is better with real cheese.

          • anne-on

            I have a mini crock pot I bought JUST for queso dip for parties, because cheese. My husband does not share my love for cheese in all forms so our neighbors split the crock pot with me ;)

    • cat socks

      I like ham & cheese sliders and pigs in a blanket. I’ve found the sliders re-heat pretty well. I use this recipe for the sliders. Taquitos are good too. I don’t remember the recipe I used for those, but they can be frozen.
      https://everydayannie.com/2010/07/13/ham-and-cheese-sliders/

      Also, these pecans are delicious an great on salads too:
      https://www.onceuponachef.com/recipes/sweet-spicy-candied-pecans.html

      For frozen food, I like the beef mini tacos from Trader Joes.

    • AnonATL

      We never go to super bowl parties in general, but I’m always down for an excuse to eat bar food. I make boneless wings (aka chicken nuggets) that we each top with our sauce of choice, a small container of spinach artichoke dip because I usually have jarred artichokes around, guac, and then carrots and celery. It’s nice grazing food and somewhat healthy.

    • Winter

      Chili in a crock pot feels like super bowl to me. It’s great for left overs, too.

    • anon

      Scotcheroos for dessert. Cheese dip. Oooh, maybe jalepeno popper dip, too? Somewhere in my freezer is a package of Trader Joe’s mac n cheese bites that I’ve been saving for a special occasion like this.

    • Anonymous

      I don’t follow football enough to know who is in the superbowl this year, but my friend usually (pre- covid of course) has a Superbowl Party and does themed food from each team’s state. So one year it was Philly cheesesteak sliders, boston creme pie cupcakes, and then various chips/dip/apps. It was yummy and fun!

  6. Anon

    Can someone recommend an all-in-one color copier/scanner/printer? Some previously recommended a Brother version on here and I bookmarked it, but I just went to purchase it and it’s discontinued.

    • Anon

      I have the MFC-L2750DW All-In-One Monochrome Laser Printer. I bought from B&H Photo because I’ve bought camera equipment from them for years, so I know they have good CS. It went in and out of stock, so I set a notification request, and bought as soon as the e-mail hit my inbox.

      • anonshmanon

        I think in the last printer discussion, I had two others agree with me that the HP ENVY 4520 goes through ink cartridges at a speed that is bewildering and frustrating. It also offers the ink subscription mentioned below, but I’m tooooo cheap for that.

    • Anon

      I have the HP Envy 5000 All In One. I like everything about it. I enrolled in the Instant Ink program so I never have to think about it, they just mail it when I need it (which they monitor through the app.) It sits across the room from my desk and is hooked via wifi to my computer, but everyone in the house can also print to it either by choosing the printer on their device over wifi, or sending their document to a dedicated email address, which I think is pretty cool.

      There’s no feed tray for copying or scanning so if you do a lot of big jobs it can be kind of a pain. You can make a multi page scan but you have to add each sheet to be scanned manually. That’s the only drawback I can think of.

  7. Anon

    I am wearing my Athleta Pranayama cardigan thingie (it has pockets (!!!)) with fleece-lined leggings and it feels like a Pandemic Suit Equivalent. If I changed from a turtleneck (cold) to a more shell-type under layer, I could be in a suit for all that Zoom knows. #winning

    Note: must remember to keep wearing earrings weekly so holes don’t close up. Earring Friday tomorrow?

    • Anon

      Earrings and lipstick make all the difference for zoom meetings. Just keep some in your desk drawer. I like something with a sedate dangle, like huggie hoops with a little dangling pearl. For lipstick, I like sheer with a hint of color. In my collection, I have $5 – $40 lipsticks but the best thing I’ve found in a year is Revlon Super Lustrous Shine, shade 003 Glossed up Rose.

      • Sloan Sabbith

        I put on earrings and lipstick yesterday for a meeting. Told my mom “I just feel so normal, dressed up!” My mom looked at me, looked at my shoes, looked at me and said “Sloan, you’re still in slippers and yoga leggings.” OK, I Zoom dressed up, I looked work-like from my neck up.

        Called my dad and had a semi-normal conversation. Said “Tried to look a little nice for a meeting today” and he very slowly enunciated “What happened to your face?” Thanks, Dad.

        • AnonATL

          Thinking of you and your family Sloan! Hoping your dad is doing better.
          I had to interview a few employee candidates on a video call the other day and I walked up to my husband in a nice sweater, face of makeup, and ratty pants and go “do I look like a serious adult from the waist up?”
          Normal AnonATL is no makeup, hair all over the place, tshirt, and ratty pants.

    • Winter

      Sounds cozy! My “office” is in a very cold room, so on many days I am draped in two plaid blankets that I refer to as my Pandemic Suit.

  8. Breville Hot Tea Maker

    Has anyone purchased the Breville hot tea maker? Wondering if it’s too good to be true.

    • Anon

      That seems like an unnecessarily complicated electric kettle. You can get electric kettles with different temperature settings.

      • AIMS

        Or maybe I misread. I just have their electric tea kettle with different temp settings. It’s great for tea and French press coffee or just when I need boiling water quickly for cooking.

    • OP

      I’m honestly really interested in the auto timer so that I can have a cup of tea ready when I get up in the morning.

    • Anon

      I am a HUGE tea drinker, 2-3 pots/day. My Breville tea maker may be my favorite thing I own. It’s expensive but worth it. I moved a few years ago and the glass carafe broke in transit. Before unpacking I had to run out and buy a new one.

  9. Anon

    Any marketing/comms people (especially higher ed) want to talk Black History Month? Leadership in my unit wants to make a big deal about it, but some of their ideas feel performative or token-y to me. From looking at other higher ed marketing campaigns, it does seem like a lot of schools are doing something like featuring a different Black faculty member every day of February and I’m sure some of these schools are pretty much exhausting all the Black faculty they have in order to do this. Am I way off base in thinking this is kind of icky and performative, especially when Black people are so under-represented in academia? Any idea how to acknowledge the month in a way that feels genuinely inclusive?

    • Anon

      so i work in higher ed, but not in marketing and comms and just received an email from my institution with a list of virtual events and a brief intro about the work the school is doing relating to diversity and exploring the school’s relationship with slavery. it does feel performative, but they have to do something. i also actually found it strange that they sent the email today, an hour before the first event was scheduled (i already had a meeting at that time), rather than at least on January 31 or Feb 1 so I would have been able to pencil some of these things into my calendar. on the non-higher ed side, retail is doing it too. i received an email from carters (the kids clothing brand), highlighting a few people who work there who went to HBCUs advertising their new HBCU college t-shirt line. i just did some googling and apparently a few years ago some universities served a lunch in honor of black history month by serving fried chicken and koolaid, which is so unbelievably offensive, so definitely don’t do that.

      • Anon

        Thanks, this is helpful. Both the virtual events about your school’s history with slavery and the clothing brand marketing their HBCU clothes feel like more natural applications of BHM to me. I work for a pretty small unit (think something like the biology department) so I feel like it’s more of a stretch for us to try to capitalize on Black History Month. Like, “Here look at our one Black faculty member!” (who is already trotted out for every diversity/inclusion occasion) just feels very weird to me. But I understand why people feel like we should do something to acknowledge it. The fried chicken lunch is insane, omg.

        • Anonymous

          For Black History Month, the most logical thing would be to highlight the contributions of Black scientists to the field throughout history.

          Does your university’s public affairs office have any guidance?

        • anon

          The fact that you work for a small unit changes things for me. Yeah, it’s a stretch. Especially if diversity in your department is already an issue. Is there another university-wide campaign you can piggyback on? I also like the idea of highlighting notable Black scholars in your discipline, in addition to your current faculty member.

    • Anonymous

      Yeah. Do not make this a “Look! We have Black employees!” Month or make it about current individual employees. That is gross.

      • Anon

        Make sure everyone smiles at the one black employee with a big fake smile all day when you talk about Black History Month. Super cool! /s

        • Anonymous

          Even better, make sure to call on the one black employee during a meeting and ask them for their thoughts on the month.

        • Emma

          Ugh, yes. My previous firm had one black attorney and somehow always felt the need to stick him on all our marketing campaigns and then “feature” him for black history month along with a nice guy who worked in the copy room. It was so cringey and performative seeing as how that firm had serious issues with diversity and being a massive old boys club.

      • Monday

        I also wonder if these employees really want to be featured in the first place. Would they feel comfortable saying “no, I feel tokenized”? Or, “instead, why don’t you interview me about what it’s like to work here as a Black person?”

    • anon

      Possibly by highlighting some accomplishments of current and former Black faculty members? That way it’s not all on the current faculty. Maybe a profile on Joe Jones, first Black faculty member in Department XYZ? I’m in the same field, and some of these campaigns make me verrrry uncomfortable, too. It feels a little exploitative, like “here’s one more thing we’re asking you to do.” I truly do not know what the perfect answer is.

    • Anon

      Two things come to my mind.
      Can you send out emails once a week celebrating little known black history facts or figures? Especially as related to education, it is pretty widely known that schools do not teach a lot of black history, nor do they give a lot of nuance to less well known black history facts. Even better if it’s school specific. For example at my alma mater it wasn’t “rediscovered” until the 90s that a black architect designed that campus so that is now highlighted a lot. Highlighting your school’s student’s efforts in the civil rights movement could be good. Or prominent black alumni.
      Alternatively, could you highlight one or two black faculty per week, but in particular highlighting in depth their research specialty and not just a two sentence blurb re “woohoo look black english professor”.
      Or highlighting the partnerships the school has that improve the quality of life of the local black community.

      • Anon

        Sadly some academic disciplines have actually driven black professors out over time; it could be that important pillars in the field were black and should be recognized.

    • Anon

      As an academic in a field with essentially zero Black faculty members, I hear you on the icky/performative feelings. But what about highlighting Black students? We don’t do anything at the department level, but at least talking about our students would feel genuine, and there are a lot of them so it wouldn’t feel like we were just picking tokens.

    • anon

      I may not be following the jist of this thread, but if I understand correctly, you work for a college/university and you are wondering how to recognize black history month? I would highly recommend you “bring” (obviously virtually cuz pandemic) a top notch speaker about racial history. I was fairly ignorant of inequality and completely unaware black history month was a thing, until I stumbled into a Cornell West talk in Feb of my freshman year. I don’t think you could possibly do anything better than bringing an expert to educate your students.

    • Anon

      My public R1 has a long and storied legacy of (with the assistance of the legislature) poaching programs and starving the public HBCU in the same city, so yeah… performative. No real way around that here.

  10. Anon

    For the size 16 poster this morning looking for fancy spa duds.

    J Jill’s got you.

    Signed, a size 18

  11. anon

    What’s everyone eating for dinner tonight? I am beyond sick of cooking but went grocery shopping yesterday, so I suppose I should do that instead of getting carryout.

    • Senior Attorney

      We’re having pan-seared steaks with brown butter sauce, mashed potatoes, and roasted carrots. (Sounds fancy but it’s Blue Apron so I didn’t have to think about it, I just have to execute it!)

      • anon

        If you are up for a little bit of fancy experimenting with new techniques, try a reverse sear! You cook slow in the oven first, and then finish in a hot pan for the nice brown surface. (My plan for anniversary dinner on Sat)

        • Anon

          This is what we’re doing tonight. Ever since my husband learned that even chuck roast can be cooked this way, it’s been on regular rotation (still better with steak cuts though!).

    • Seafinch

      This might cause a revolt around here but Nigella’s Vegan Spag Bol with garlic bread. I feel optimistic after five hours of training and presenting, two PR workouts today, and an afternoon gardening session! #covidwfhsilverlinings

    • Erin Go Nowhere

      Pizza! It’s almost Friday, time to start planning for the weekend.

    • Anon

      Red beans and rice. I know you’re supposed to have them on Mondays, but they’re for tonight and it is what it is.

    • Go for it

      Small crock of French onion soup with crusty bread & Muenster, a small side of mushroom risotto plus a mini apple, raisin walnut salad drizzled with honey.
      Go me :))

    • Anon

      Korean ground beef with rice and some sesame cucumber salad. Kind of like Korean bowls. If I get really ambitious I might also do broccoli but chances are not good. I had horrible insomnia pre- a big presentation this morning.

    • Anonymous

      Capellini with artichoke pesto, feta and kalamata olives. One of our better all
      pantry efforts.

    • KS IT Chick

      This week’s meals … sausage & sauerkraut pizza, dirty rice AKA rice dressing, beef & potato tacos and slow-cooker jambalaya. We went out for dinner last night.

  12. Anon

    I’m reading about Marilyn Manson and women who are accusing him of abuse and I know this is going to sound shallow, but why are women even attracted to someone like him who intentionally tries to look and sound creepy? Can anyone explain this to me? He’s always looked scary and with tons of makeup on – do other women find his look attractive? I’ve never heard of any of his music but is he a big star or something?

    • Anon

      I’m following this story very closely this week. He is so repulsive. Like, I cannot even imagine getting near him. He was pretty famous I guess in the late 90s, and it seems like women were probably initially attracted to some of that star power (and I guess “bad boy” image) and then it sounds like he started in on the abuse. Filling in the pieces myself, it sounds like a lot of these women wanted to be models or actresses, etc. and so he probably did get them to consent to some weird stuff at first, and then once it turned non-consensual, he used that initial consensual stuff to blackmail and gaslight them: I’ll tell everyone what you did, no one will believe you, no one will want to work with you, I’ll have you blacklisted, etc. He is such a creep. I feel bad for these poor women.

    • Anon

      I mean, he’s rich, famous, intelligent and charismatic, and pretty ordinary looking without the make up. I don’t think this is a healthy question to ask when a story like this comes out, but this doesn’t seem like a mystery at all to me.

      • Anonymous

        +1 it’s not a mystery at all. The guy is a rockstar, and surely in his day to day life doesn’t wear the crazy makeup. So what you’re left with is a really rich guy who is quite ordinary looking and famous.

    • AZCPA

      Not everyone is attracted to the same thing.Yes, MANY women find him very attractive. And many people find him incredibly talented. He’s a huge star in his genre, not just “in the 90s.”

      Doesn’t change that he likely abused the power his situation brought him, and should be thoroughly investigated and charged depending on what is found.

        • Anon

          I don’t think many men are attractive in appearance, but I’ve certainly admired how clear and compellingly he’s spoken in interviews before. And I would guess that it is on average more common to end up in an abusive relationship with someone who is compelling when they speak than it is to just be overwhelmed by attraction?

    • Anon

      Have you ever seen him out of his role make-up? He’s done some acting roles while looking like a regular person (Jawbreakers and Sons of Anarchy are first to come to mind, but there’s plenty more).

      Lots of people in show business have a cosplay element to their work. He doesn’t get done up like that to sit at his breakfast bar and eat pancakes.

      • Anon

        Also who cares if he did. There are billions of people in this world, most of them aren’t going to like or be attracted to the same things as OP.

    • BeenThatGuy

      Personally, I’m not a fan but I had a run in with him about 20 years ago (both in a VIP area at a small concert in NYC; not his music genre FWIW). He was lovely. All joking aside, I had a very normal, pleasant, brief conversation with him. As for “intentionally trying to look and sound creepy”, it’s an act. He’s an artist and highly intelligent and knows that sells.

    • Anonymous

      He was with Dita Von Teese for a long time, and she’s an absolute stunner. Different strokes.

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