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Workwear sales of note for 3.31.23:
- Ann Taylor – 30% off full-price tops and sweaters; up to 40% off all sale styles
- Athleta – All sale up to 60% off
- Banana Republic Factory – 50% off everything; extra 15% off purchase
- Boden – Up to 50% off; 20% off sale & new-season styles
- Brooks Brothers – Friends & Family Event: 30% off almost everything
- Express – All women’s jeans $49 + styles from $20
- Everlane – Up to 30% off spring essentials
- J.Crew – 40% off your purchase; swim from $24.50
- J.Crew Factory – 40% off entire site & storewide, plus extra 20% off orders $125+ with code
- Loft – $29 everyday shirts
- Sephora – Up to 50% off select beauty
- Talbots – Buy one get one 50% off! Free shipping on $150+
Some of our latest posts here at Corporette…
And some of our latest threadjacks here at Corporette (reader questions and commentary) — see more here!
- What are your favorite parts of a typical day?
- At what point in your life (age, income level, whatever) were you able to take an annual vacation?
- What shoes can I keep at the office to go for mid-day walks (that go with everything)?
- How do you release stress or trauma that’s stored in the body?
- What are the best “networking for women events” you’ve ever been to?
- I feel like we’re burning through any savings we acquire…
- I hate my job and make 30% of what DH makes – should I quit?
- What do you keep in your office?
So in an effort to kick a minor bout of acid reflux this weekend (bc I’m prone to it and wasn’t wanting it to become a days long thing), haven’t had any tea or chocolate (my 2 caffeine sources) since Sat. Doing ok but really want one or the other this afternoon even though I know it’s better to cut out acid sources for as long as I can. So any alternative snack suggestions? Preferably things available at au bon pain, Pret etc?
Anon in NYC
What about herbal tea? Hot water with lemon and honey? A matcha latte? I find matcha far less acidic that, say, coffee, but I don’t have acid reflux.
I’m not a doctor, but I was under the impression that eating acidic food had little to nothing to do with reflux for many people. If those things are triggers for you, then avoid them, but if not, there’s no reason to. As far as I can tell, the only things that cause reflux for me are oatmeal and some specific asthma medications.
For me, it is gaining weight and tight waistbands. Food doesn’t really matter, and losing weight/loosening tight pants helped.
Nighttime eating was my big culprit, in addition to weight gain. Removing the nighttime eating helped with the heartburn and the extra weight!
What are your trigger foods? Fatty/fried foods, acidic foods, spicy food, citrus fruits, caffeine, alcohol, etc. can all be triggers but most people only have a few specific ones. It’s hard to suggest a snack without knowing what you’re trying to avoid.
weight loss and clothing
Am in the process of working to lose approx. 45 lbs over the course of 8ish months. My income is about 40k/yr. I’m short and hourglass shaped. This means that my weight will be changing for a while, I don’t have much money, and finding things that fit me is already tricky.
That said, would it be better to keep going to a tailor to “adjust” clothing to fit or to try to find cheap items knowing that they won’t fit for long or is there another way people do this?
I am already experiencing pants where the crotch seems to drop because they no longer stay up on my waist and tops that make me look wider than I am, yet I do have a jlo shape and I do carry weight on my lower abs, so I don’t want to end up in clothing emphasizing the wrong parts of me by being too tight until I lose enough that they fit correctly.
I’m generally a jeans/tshirt or oversized sweater kind of gal and I’m trying to figure out how to do this without looking like I’m swimming in my clothes and without spending a fortune/going through the frustrating shopping process all the time.
Unless you are very tall, you can only tailor so much before the rise is all wrong. Like 1 size difference in the waist / hips, but not 3-4 sizes.
Maybe a couple of Limited paper-bag-waist pants (high and stretchy or cinch-able), which you could cinch as needed? Or shift dresses?
I am in a similar position as the OP and recommend finding a couple dresses that will work. Pants get tricky fast.
This a somewhat expensive option, but I’ve used the Infinite Style service by Ann Taylor for this. For $100 a month, I get three items at a time. I try to wear them within a week of getting them and then immediately return the box to get the next three items. I can usually get at least 3 boxes a month (so 9 pieces). I’m still wearing a lot of too big things, but I can mix them with the three pieces that do fit properly and it works pretty well (I wear my too-big shirts with pants that fit or fitted shirts with my droopy ones). It’s not perfect, but to me, I would spend $100 on new clothes and then immediately outgrow them and need new ones the next month, so this has worked. You could also look at Rent the Runway Unlimited, but Ann Taylor fits my needs better.
This is brilliant.
Oh hey! A straight-sized Gwynnie Bee. Good to keep in mind once I drop a few more inches.
How do you feel about high-waisted pants? Target’s “Super Skinny High Waist Pants” from their in-house brand A New Day are pretty forgiving – they are not super tight, despite the name. Maybe a couple pairs of those plus longer tops can get you through?
Right now the majority of my wardrobe is Target, Kohls, and whatever bargains I can dig up at Marshall’s.
I think you can wear most tops and dresses for about 20 lbs. For ex, a size 8 dress will fit me at 150 lbs and at 130 lbs, just will look better with Spanx at 150 and look a little big at 130 lbs. The same applies to medium size tops. So, I advise accepting that things wont look perfectly tailored and fit to your body during this transition time and then reward yourself when you are at your goal weight by getting items that are tailored to your size. IMO its better to make do with an acceptable fit if you are only going to be at a particular size for a few weeks.
Dresses are your friend! I would stick to cheap black dresses. Cheap fabric looks less cheap in black, and black hides all sorts of lumps and bumps. You can also wear the same 5 black dresses each week and no one will notice. Look at Jones NY and Lands End for jersey or black ponte dresses. If you know your size in a particular brand, check out Poshmark for inexpensive secondhand clothing.
I would try wrap dresses or loose dresses which can be adjusted with a belt as you will be changing weight and shape. Maybe longer chunkier sweaters with leggings for more casual occassions. Good luck!
I would buy some simple, swing dresses from Old Navy and wear them with tights for now, without tights in the warmer months. Buy them in Tall as they run short. They are inexpensive and go on sale frequently. They are a little more fitted around the shoulder and arms but they drape nicely in a stretchy fabric and hide everything below the bust in a flattering way. You can easily hide a lot of weight changes in dresses of this style. Buy them in simple dark colors, wear with various toppers/sweaters. You’ll be fine.
These are perfect to wear with your oversized sweater collection.
And a 30% off coupon just popped up on this site after I clicked on this link. Very useful dresses. Posted on another blog I like for frugal every day dresses.
It is one of the great tragedies of my life that I cannot wear swing dresses without looking like a starving urchin in a Dickensian nightgown, even though I’m not really that thin.
That’s why you wear a chunky sweater/layers on top of it.
Or you belt it.
I understand this – I’ve lost 80 pounds in the last 8 months, which for me has been 4 changes of size. My clothing budget is extremely limited and my local shopping options are also limited for work wear. I’ve adopted a sort of temporary uniform of pants/tank/cardigan, and I have bought quite a number of those at Walmart since that’s both nearby and inexpensive. I mix and match and incorporate nicer jewelry and it works for me. I can generally make the tops/sweaters last a size or two but I have to change out the pants more often. I do buy items with spandex whenever possible so they hold their shape as I shrink. I also shop consignment whenever possible (in-store and Poshmark) and sell the clothes I’ve outgrown that are worth it/donate the rest. I don’t feel totally boring, but I accept that once I get to goal and maintain, I may expand my choices in a way I don’t bother with now.
Good luck with your journey!
Never too many shoes...
Because you mentioned having a “goal”, it seems this is a desired outcome for you and I wanted to say congratulations on your amazing progress.
Thanks for the thoughtfulness in your wording and your encouragement. It’s something I’ve long desired and finally found the right approach and motivation for, and it is totally changing my life. I should hit goal this summer. The last time I was that healthy weight for my frame I was in middle school! I am…. significantly past that age now.
Thrift stores. It might take some time, but you should be able to find a few good pieces for great prices. As with the other comments, I would stick to more flexible things like dresses and skirts because they’ll carry you through a bigger weight range. And maybe go for leggings instead of jeans for a few months?
And losing (or gaining) weight as a short person is tough. I’m 5′ tall and I basically change a size every 5-8 lbs.
Congrats and and continued good luck!
+1 to thrift shops (or eBay if you know the item you want to size down into) and to being short and the ratio of pounds to clothing sizes.
Another +1 to leggings/leggings as being forgiving, and to dresses.
Good luck finding some transition items, lots of great suggestions here!
I have had good luck finding decent used clothes for very cheap at Swap.com. It is a little hit or miss figuring out what fits, but I’ve bought nice, lined wool trousers from Banana Republic for about $6. With prices under $10 I can afford to pay return shipping for things that just don’t work.
I was you about 2 years ago. My advice is to buy cheap transitional clothes–but splurge on new bras every time you go down a size.
As I slimmed down, my body shrunk disproportionately and unexpectedly. As an always curvy woman, I now have a very different silhouette body-wise than before. And the biggest changes were during the last 20 pounds lost.
I regret spending a lot of money replacing clothing while in transition. But the money spent on bras that fit was well worth every penny! Buy a good bra or two that fits your body where it is NOW, and replace it as needed. That will do amazing things for your look and your attitude.
credit for work?
I am newer in my career but have a lot of experience via volunteering and previous work before transitioning into this career. I enjoy publishing and presenting, but I’m not sure I am far enough in the career to be seen as enough of an authority, so I co-publish and co-present with others. However, because they are further along, their name is always listed first, which matters in these situations (think 1st author vs. 2nd author in journals, etc.). This happens even when I do significantly more work.
Is this just how it goes or is there something I can be doing to change this? I’m not sure if it’s right for me to be feeling some kinda way about not receiving the credit or CV boost after my hard work or if this is just how it goes until I am decades longer into my career.
What kind of role/field are you in? If you’re a grad student publishing scientific papers, then you should generally be first author on papers you did most of the day to day work on. But if you were a technician doing similar work, you might not be expected to take the same “ownership” of the project and be second or third author.
Would this work be published if the first author’s name was not on it? I am sure the work itself is great but the other author’s name may be lending extra credibility to it or paving the way to make publishing it easier.
if it is a journal, aren’t reviews blind?
Maybe but OP specifically said she co-publishes because she is not far enough along to be seen as an expert so I assume that the other author is providing credibility through their name somehow which is valuable in its own way.
It’s actually pretty rare for reviewers to be blind to the identity of the authors. I’m not sure if I’ve ever reviewed a paper that didn’t identify the authors, and even if they didn’t, I could make a pretty good guess in a lot of cases. First author usually comes down to the person who actually writes most of the paper. Is this you or someone else?
You need to talk with your supervisor about what the criteria for credit/responsibility for this situation. It varies wildly depending upon your field. You don’t mention how long you have been in this career, and how other people’s experience compares to yours.
For example, in science, you can be a technician or even a graduate student and even if you are working full time on a project if the ideas/some of the work/most of direction come from a post-doc, then they will be first author and your professor will be the last author.
Talk to your Professor if you want to clarify how talks/authorship will work in the future. Let him/her know your goal is to be first author/give your own talks, and ask for advice on how to get there.
If you are not in academia and are presenting at business conferences and the like, then no, there is probably no way to change this. Organizers will want to list the person with the most name recognition first.
If it’s any consolation, people in your field are likely familiar with these sorts of conventions and will not make assumptions about who did what work based on the order names are listed in. And, until you have name recognition of your own, you may benefit from getting additional readers or attendees by having someone more senior or established to get attention for your talk – people who show up to hear Dr. Greybeard but are impressed by what you have to say, as well.
for people with special needs relatives
If they work, what do they do? I have a relative with ASD and he struggles to find employment and to maintain it. He has asked me for help seeking work but I’m not sure where to start. (His state has a gov’t program but it has been useless after many years of trying.) Larger companies seem to have corporate hiring processes that weed him out and anything working with a vulnerable population is not a good fit for him for other reasons not to disclose here but that won’t ever change.
Advice? Over the years that he’s struggled with this, We/I’ve tried gov’t organizations and support group options local to him but nothing seems to be helping (I think these programs are overrun and under funded, not that they are bad programs).
Google WSJ articles on this. There was one recently on how ASD people are good at repetitive jobs that others find boring and are otherwise hard to fill. Had some good ideas re jobs/industries.
Parts of my job would be good for an ASD person b/c they are repetitive and tedious (so you would just have to train someone one time if they could master the repetition / boredom).
Not sure about ASD specifically (and probably depends on his individual needs) but common jobs that I have seen for those who have intellectual disabilities are working in a cafeteria (at a college, not with minors) and bagger at a grocery store (Publix seems to really support this). It’s not clear where you relative is on the spectrum though, so it would help if you posted a little more detail about his capabilities/level of development.
In my city, one of the paper shredding company hires individuals with disabilities to help collect the big cans from office buildings and take to the shredding place. A supervisor always goes with them, but it seems like a great program. Our grocery store and some hotels (housekeeping) seem to have similar programs.
I used to work with United Cerebral Palsy and they did a good matching employees with special needs with interested employers. As a job coach, I had clients who worked as bussers in restaurants; did weekly janitorial work at an auto shop; an ASD client who completely rocked her job at a popcorn manufacturing facility; and a client who started his own paper shredding business.
If your relative is in Minnesota (I work for the State Gov’t), we’re actively looking to hire individuals with disabilities and have an entire non-competitive hiring lane set up to attract people with disabilities who want to work. Google State of MN and Connect 700.
State of Minnesota – Connect 700
One of my neighbor has a son with ASD and he works as a night clerk at a grocery store (shelving items, breaking down boxes, cleaning). He does not need to work with customers and it appeals to his somewhat obsessive need to keep things tidy and categorized. His employer loves him, although they have apparently needed to explain that not everyone is quite as good as he is at making sure the broken down boxes are lined up exactly and precisely.
What state does he live in? There are resources for this set up for every state. For example in CA you would find your local regional center. They do life long job training for individuals with Autism. His parents / caregivers should also call up Parents Helping Parents because they provide amazing trainings on how to figure out the system for older individuals with special needs. Lastly, there are a bunch of volunteer advocacy programs that will provide you with an advocate that knows his rights and will for free attend meetings so he is able to get the resources and help he needs. It takes a lot of figuring out and coordinating but i haven’t found a state that doesn’t provide it. You do need to be a squeaky wheel to make it happen though.
Anon in MT
My local Home Depot seems to have a program for this.
the yellow one is the sun
Does anyone know if these feel like the muslin Aden and Anais swaddles? Wondering if I could cut up an old one and get the same effect.
I might need these face cloths. I’m a devoted cold cream washer due to tips on this site (life changing!) but rinsing with a washcloth has been not the best. I don’t love it dripping on my bathroom floor and it takes forever to dry.
Cold cream seems to be making me break out. Is there an adjustment period or should I give it up?
Nope. If you’re acne prone, it’s the absolute worst thing you could put on your skin–heavy oily stuff, when most derms recommend oil-free things for acne sufferers. Give it up!
Thanks for the info! I experienced the same thing. Guess it’s not for me.
I have 14 face cloths and toss them in the hamper after every use.
Lana Del Raygun
I’m always paranoid that things will mildew if I throw them in the hamper wet/damp. Does that ever happen to you, or should I let this fear go?
Possibly a dumb question, but why would that matter if they are being washed?
In my experience, mildew spots don’t really wash out, ever. I basically throw away anything that gets mildewed.
I hang them over the edge of the hamper to let them dry out. Seems to be working.
Re-posting from late in the morning thread:
Does anyone know a photo sharing site that lets you set different levels of access for different users, i.e., you can choose to let certain users download your photos but not others? This is in the context of a new baby and I’ve looked at the major baby photo-sharing sites (Moment Garden, Lifecake, TinyBeans) but none of them have this feature as far as I can tell.
Smugmug allows you to provide a password for downloading, and a separate one for viewing.
Shutterfly share sites might do that.
How many of you had wisdom teeth? And were they always problematic?
I don’t have them. It appears to run in my family. I think it is awesome. Kiddo #1 doesn’t have them, either. Is HORRIFIED. And worried that she’ll be teased later on b/c we are also southern (and I am sure my Mayflower in-laws will just luuuuve this).
I think she hit the lottery. I can’t tell her that we are more highly evolved than other people (though in just I might). Horror stories, please.
I don’t understand? Your kid is afraid she’ll be teased because she doesn’t have wisdom teeth and is from the south?
WTF are you talking about?
Kids tease over all sorts of things, doubly-so if you’re sensitive about it. I’d go with “more highly evolved than you.”
+1 Being teased about wisdom teeth, or lack thereof, is a thing???
There seems to be a lot of class-ism associated with missing teeth (for whatever reason).
Yes, but isn’t that more like “normal” teeth like a front tooth that fell out that you were too poor to replace. How many people even have their wisdom teeth their entire lives?
I think she is probably hearing “missing teeth” and not “missing teeth that won’t even erupt until you are a grown-up / out of high school” and over-reacting b/c this was not what was on her agenda this morning. No kid likes to be different/bad. Even different/good is hard. Bless their hearts — middle school is just tears and hormones and drama that they just muddle through.
Ok, but can’t you just tell her that these teeth aren’t even visible and no one will know? It seems like a 1 min conversation to fix the issue.
No one will ever know?
I don’t have wisdom teeth and I consider that one of the greatest blessings of my life (ok maybe that’s an exaggeration. But it’s seriously awesome to never have to go through surgery to remove them!)
How are her peers even going to know this to tease her about it??
Right? Tell her to just keep her mouth shut about it. (Heh. Mouth shut.)
Never too many shoes...
Bahahaha. That’s funny.
So lucky. I had three impacted wisdom teeth that had to be sectioned and removed. I had a great oral surgeon and it was still totally not fun.
Its also totally not fun for adults I’ve known who have had a wisdom tooth flare up while at work / right before their wedding etc. and have had to have them removed on an emergency basis.
Anon in NYC
I wish I had never had wisdom teeth – how lucky! I had wisdom teeth, had to get all 4 removed when I was in college. It was unpleasant, and one of the stitches did not dissolve so I kept feeling something in the back of my mouth for a few weeks until I finally had to go back to the dentist and have it removed. My husband had badly impacted wisdom teeth and his recovery was much much tougher than mine.
Huh? How would anyone know she doesn’t have them? Don’t discuss it with friends if you’re so sensitive to it. Wtf? How dumb is your kid?
Huh. This is a strange thing for a kid to get worked up over. Wisdom teeth vary based on ancestry (“southern” isn’t one of them). In some parts of the world, as much as 40% of the population doesn’t have them. http://journals.plos.org/plosone/article?id=10.1371/journal.pone.0162070
Kids are just dumb sometimes. But, based on this, maybe we’re secretly Korean! Or Bengali!
I don’t understand why your kid is worried — how would anyone know whether or not she has them? And what on earth does being Southern have to do with it?? Like she doesn’t have “wisdom” teeth so she’s a dumb redneck southerner??
I haven’t every really discussed wisdom teeth with anyone except to talk about how I had them removed. I don’t think most (American?) adults have any.
I’d ask your kid to make sure they are confusing molars and wisdom teeth? Or what urban myth the kids at school are spreading about wisdom teeth?
Yeah, this is good point that she might be confusing her 1st and 2nd molars with wisdom teeth (3rd set). Maybe look a diagram of adult teeth with her that shows when they come in and/or have her dentist explain it. They generally don’t erupt until the end of high school so I doubt her friends will give her grief about this. Especially the ones who are recovering from surgery (which generally s*cks)
+1 Most people I know had their wisdom teeth come in very late in high school or during college and by then most people are mature enough not to tease about something this silly. This seems like something that might be an issue in 6th grade, but having wisdom teeth that young would be incredibly rare. I bet even by high school graduation a minority of people will have them, so if it’s really an issue she can tell people she has them and they haven’t come in yet.
I think that this is it — she isn’t realizing that the missing teeth would be invisible even if / when they came in. It’s not like she’s missing something you’d see in a selfie.
But didn’t you explain this to her when she found out she didn’t have them??? Or didn’t the dentist?
Southerner. Not sure why anyone would be judged about not having wisdom teeth and how being Southern has anything to do with this. Those that have had painful experiences will be jealous and those that have wisdom teeth without painful experiences wouldn’t care either way.
Another one who literally never discussed wisdom teeth with peers until I was 18 and had them out.
But if your kid wants to feel like she dodged a bullet, all four of mine were impacted, so anesthesia/surgery/stitches. Whoops, the stitches ripped and I had blood running down my throat for two days. Did you know that lots of blood in your stomach makes you vomit? Cuz it does.
(But at the end of the day I was fine, because of all the things that matter in this world wisdom teeth are way down the list…)
I only have two and they’ve never caused issues. My sister has zero and I don’t think my brother has them, either. Not Southern, have never felt anything but hugely grateful that I dodged that bullet. I have difficult teeth otherwise (permanent stains from meds, receding gums, weak enamel, etc) so I’ll take what I can get!
Could she be thinking they actually impart wisdom and she’ll miss out? I’m pretty smart and my sister is smarter than me :)
Fwiw, my dentist told me I didn’t have wisdom teeth but it turned out I did (and had to have them remove.)
This is such a funny thing to be worked up over because a lot of people don’t have them. It’s really not a big deal.
I also never had wisdom teeth (it runs in my dad’s family), and I don’t remember it ever coming up in conversation until I was in my 20’s and started hearing horror stories from my friends and colleagues. And then the reaction was much more jealousy that I didn’t have wisdom teeth. I can not remember the topic ever coming up when I was a kid, nor ever getting teased for it.
Incidentally, I’m also early-40s and still have one baby tooth. It’s a molar so not obvious, but I haven’t ever been teased about that either…
I’m not in the South US but I can’t imagine how this would ever be an issue to be teased about in any culture.
I have a baby tooth, too! I tell my DH that I am his child bride.
How would anyone even know?? Wisdom teeth are in the very back of your mouth so if she doesn’t want anyone to know whether or not she has them, they won’t. I think only one of my four erupted and I was so glad because I never had to have the surgery.
If she were missing her four FRONT teeth, yeah, teasing. No one will know or care about wisdom teeth, and it does not indicate she is some kind of “hillbilly” (a derogatory term I would not normally use, but apparently what you believe your blueblood WASP inlaws will think). I like the idea of considering that she is more highly evolved.
When DS was in high school, as far as I know wisdom teeth were discussed among his friends only if someone had to have them out. He and his girlfriend both had theirs removed over Thanksgiving in their first year of college. He had an okay time with the surgery, but she had horrific complications; they were driving back to their east coast schools from the Midwest at the end of the break and had to turn around and come home because she was in such pain.
I had mine removed at 25, not long before I started law school, and got a terrible infection, that nearly got into the bone. It was the worst. She should feel lucky, really.
So, I had wisdom teeth, not impacted, and actually had them removed with just local anesthesia (no horror story there). However, I was your daughter with respect to braces and worrying. I have straight teeth and only a very, very minor overbite. But, there is a gap (a small one) between my two front teeth. I have two brothers, who both needed braces and retainers, and I was the only kid who I knew who didn’t have braces/retainers/etc. Looking back, I am sure my parents were absolutely relived that they didn’t need to shell out more braces $$$, but at the time, EVERYONE had braces, so I was the odd kid out for NOT having them.
I was extremely stressed about this, and to relieve my stress, my parents took me to the orthodontist to have him explain why i DIDN’T need braces. He explained things in his office in like 7 minutes and it all made perfect sense and I never worried about not having braces ever again. I think it helped that he was a “3rd party authority” (i.e., not my parents) so I was more apt to believe him. The orthodontist was a golf partner of my dad’s, so I think the visit was $0. So, if you have the time at your next dental cleaning for your kid, I’d bring it up then.
This has got to be one of the most bizarre posts I’ve seen in a long time.
Please, do not pass along your complex about wisdom teeth to your daughter. Obviously no other human being on the earth will know she doesn’t have wisdom teeth except her dentist. There is nothing wrong with not having them, and it is great as she will not have to worry about having them removed as many people have to and it really stinks.
Does anxiety run in your family? Your poor daughter….. It is clearly not normal to be worried about something so irrational. So many odd things in this post….
This might be one of the most bizarre posts I’ve ever seen here. Do you understand what wisdom teeth are? They’re problematic for reasons discussed here, but some people never have issues. Most importantly, they are not *visible* to other people and kids don’t really have them anyways. Once your daughter understands that no one will be able to tell whether she has them, she will realize that this is an utter non-issue. Hopefully you will, too.
Not sure how old your daughter is but this seems like a great opportunity to teach confidence. Not everyone is the same and that’s OK. Teach her to own her differences and/or shrug it off as no big deal. The earlier she learns that, the better off she’ll be in dealing with peer pressure.
The only explanation I can come up with for this post is that the Russian bot is misfiring.
Ha! Love this.
While I agree that having no wisdom teeth is not a real life problem – I also remember being in middle school and freaking out over ridiculous things like this.
Would it help if you explained to her that having wisdom teeth is not necessarily even the norm? It’s kind of like needing braces vs. not needing braces. Yes, a lot of people do need them, but not everyone does – and if you don’t, you are one of the lucky ones!
If she has to freak out about something (which, let’s face it, most middle school girls do) wisdom teeth aren’t such a terrible target. It’s been than being obsessed with her nose, weight, etc. Teenage years are tough!
I don’t think the answer is to tell your child that she’s “evolved” while other people who do have wisdom teeth are unevolved. Your middle-schooler should be able to hear and understand that wisdom teeth are pointless and it makes no difference whether you have them or not so having them is okay and not having them is okay and neither situation warrants much more thought.
I just started Weight Watchers to hopefully drop the twenty or so pounds I’ve picked up over the past couple years of brunches and happy hours (thanks, DC), and I am so. hungry. It’s three o’clock and I’ve used most of my points for the day, because I had a cup of full fat yogurt with breakfast and ten pita chips with lunch. Can WW veterans share some words of wisdom? I had a ton of fruit and veg with both, I thought, but it’s not cutting it. And I’m worried that having ten points left for dinner at the end of the day is going to make eating with my husband at night a bummer.
Thanks in advance, sorry to whine!
If you’re new to the program, the first few days while you adjust can be really challenging. You have to completely rearrange your understanding of how many fruits and veggies to eat. On a normal day, I’ll bring 3-4 pieces of fruit with me to the office and a 10 oz bag of baby carrots (usually split over 2 days).
Also: master the low point foods. (Certain) popcorn is super filling with only a few points. Those plain pouches of tuna used to be 0 points – I don’t know if they still are.
It was a tough adjustment (and I did this under a previous version of the plan) but I slowly learned to eat more filling foods. For example, I gave up on my old standard, bread, for breakfast because I would be starving by 10:30am. WW worked for me, partly because it made me change my habits for the better.
whenever i re-start calorie counting in any form (WW, MFP, etc), I give myself the first week or two to be “flexible” — eat as i normally would and just count EVERYTHING even if it goes really way over the allotment. It helps me to get a sense of where most of my calories come from (dinner), what the highest calorie foods I’m eating are (if you just eat the contents of a wrap, without the “wrap” you save so many calories) and helps me to strategize where to make adjustments (nightly wine is non-negotiable, but mid-day latte is). hope this helps!
No experience with WW, but I would try adding more fibre to your diet. It will fill you up for longer. Try soluble fibre such as Optifibre – I add it to flavoures water and drink every morning. Also, your metabolism will soon adjust to your new regime and you will feel less hungry day by day. Check whether adding high-protein low-calorie shake would be an optiom for you (I like reflex nutrition vegan protein or Resource Instant Protein).
I haven’t tried the new WW program, but when I did the old program successfully, it took me some time to adjust. For the first few weeks, I used my weekly points to supplement my daily points and not be hungry, not for dessert or alcohol (so, admittedly, the first few weeks felt more like a “diet” than it did later, but at least I wasn’t hungry). In the meantime, strategize ways to include as many zero- and low-point foods as you can. You got this!
Add eggs. A scrambled one with breakfast or a hard boiled one as a snack/with lunch. Same thing with beans. Fruit and veg are also good but won’t be as satisfying. Try lowfat or FF yogurt. Find bread (or cereal or lunchmeat or pita chips or…) that is one point lower per serving – those points will add up and make a difference and provide you with a bit more wiggle room at dinner. People on Connect are happy to provide specific recommendations or you can google WW message boards. Switch to water, tea, and black coffee. Commit to a zero points breakfast – really easy to do with FF yogurt, eggs, and fruit. Pick either wine or something sweet, not both. Don’t be afraid to use some/all weekly points and/or activity points. Eat chicken breast or fish daily.
You’ll have days where you use all your points by noon and then of course go negative at dinner. Don’t try to get by on vegetable soup – you’ll just be starving the next day. Don’t beat yourself up over it. As long as most of your days are within your points, you’ll be better off than where you’re starting.
Adjust your expectations. Brunch is going to become so, so different. That’s OK. Brunch will serve a different purpose now than it used to.
Also, you’ll adjust after a few weeks and not be as hungry, I promise.
It is a bit hard to get used to when you’re first starting to cut down, I know. I lost almost 20 pounds on WW three years ago, have regained some of it in the last year and am back on the wagon right now. Try snacking on 0 points fruits and veggies (I like snap peas) and just practice portion control if you really need something else. My go-to afternoon snack, based on food we keep in our office kitchen, is 1/2 ounce of pretzels or triscuits and 1/2 ounce of cheese, which comes to 3 points. Or a plain greek yogurt with fruit and 1/2 ounce chopped almonds is only 2 points.
And 10 points is a good amount for dinner, really. Remember that a lot of foods – beans, tofu, non-fat yogurt, chicken or fish, if you eat those, plus all vegetables and fruits – are 0 points. An omelet with a ton of vegetables, 1/2 oz of cheese and half an English muffin? 3 points. A big salad topped with grilled fish or chicken? 0 points. Spiced black beans and salsa on a salad or on some sautéed butternut squash? 0 points.
I hate dieting and have pretty weak willpower, but I’ve been able to lose weight and, for the most part, keep it off with WW. (I stopped tracking and was eating way too much when I was on a stress-o-matic last year; if I’d stayed with the program I don’t think I would have regained like I did.) You can do this.
Sorry, this was a reply to WW meals, above.
Fellow WW here. I eat Ff Greek yogurt for breakfast. Lunch is either chicken breast (made in crockpot on weekend) or 2 hardboil eggs with a lot of cabbage slaw mix that I get at Costco. For dinner, I try to make a soup a week to last me a few days. This week it is chicken tortilla soup. Last week was vegetable minestrone. When I get home, I’m super hungry and need to get kids fed & then we go to their evening activities. I eat fruit, carrots, and celery at work. And skinny pop popcorn. I’m very repetitive with my food choices but it makes it easier. Good luck! You can do this!
Can any financially-savvy people shed light into what’s going on with the economy/stock market? My husband told me it’s no big deal and not to worry, but as someone who graduated from law school in 2009 and went through layoffs and years of underemployment before finally landing a decent job, it’s a bit terrifying to see something so reminiscent of Sept 2008.
On the other hand, I would happily live the rest of my life in poverty if it will get Trump out of office….
All sorts of people will try to “explain” (interest rates, jobs report, wages rising, bubbles, bitcoin, panic, blah blah blah blah……no one really knows), but honestly….. just let it go. You are in the market for the long term saving for retirement. The market has been rising like crazy for a long time, perhaps too fast, and these things are cyclical and tend to have drops too.
Just don’t sell everything as things are crashing, as everyone who sat tight in 2008 and didn’t sell has recovered tremendously. It is only my friends who bailed in 2008 who are crying now.
And probably next week it will go back up…. or next year…..
Just keep plugging away, saving on schedule, and perhaps take advantage of buying a bit as prices are lower for a change.
Yeah, I’m not really concerned about our 401ks. I know the markets recovered from 2008 within 5 years and retirement is 30 years away for us. But this just reminds me of the events at the beginning the global recession in 2008 and that recession messed up my career for over 4 years (and as a result my life, because we delayed all sorts of things – from home-buying to babymaking – because we were earning so little and had so much debt). I’m more established now and my husband has a fairly recession-proof job, but I could still be in a bad spot if companies start doing widespread lay-offs.
Since you’re one of those people who was really impacted by the recession, I think you’ll always need to be a bit mindful of your tendency to be a bit overly anxious about this. I can’t remember where I read this, but someone told a story about how their grandmother who lived through the Great Depression would keep a pantry stocked to the ceiling with canned goods, and when having bad dreams about lean times, would wake up in the middle of the night and go turn on the pantry light just to see the comfort of canned goods.
While politics is absolutely bonkers right now, the stock market was riding way too high for months. A correction was natural. The stock market will always have ups and downs, and a correction does not mean a recession is around the corner. Make sure you’re living at or below your means and that you have plenty of secure, non-invested savings, and step away from the news ;)
Have some perspective. We’re down 7.95% since last Monday after a 40% run up since Nov 2016. Does this turn into a 10% correction – anyone’s guess but decent chance.
Why – lots of reasons but underlying fundamentals are strong – good global demand for goods and good earnings which are only going to be boosted by the tax cut. Friday’s unemployment and wage growth was so good that it signaled inflation – and treasury yields rose quick. That sparked a market panic that instead of just raising rates 3 times, this fed will raise 4+ times (bc you combat inflation by higher rates but higher interest rates hurt corporate earnings bc the cost of debt financing rises).
Assuming you’re not invested for the short term (and you really shouldn’t have money in the market you need in the next 1-2 yrs), I say buy the dip. People will scream at me for saying that but nothing wrong with buying some extra when things are on sale – on top of scheduled buys into the 401k and taxable accounts.
Super shorthand and way oversimplified: (1) The market went up way too much, way too fast and was due for a correction; (2) The excuse for the correction was that we are starting to [finally] see some wage growth. That combined with low unemployment makes it likely that the new Fed chair is going to push for higher interest rates to prevent inflation. That will make borrowing money more expensive for companies while also making loaning money (i.e. buying bonds) more lucrative, which in turn means people will put more money into bonds and less into the market.
We are due for a mild recession, although given the slow recovery from the 2008 crash, I don’t think most people see it coming in 2018 or being big when it happens. The 2008 crash was related to a lot of very complicated financial maneuverings that are not likely to re-occur in the next few years – although I am a bit concerned about some of the deregulation noises coming out of Washington right now.
My first experience out of school was the .com crash of 2000 so I understand your fears, but do not let yourself get drawn into obsessing about routine fluctuations. You will make yourself crazy.
This is basically what I took away from what my financial advisor told me. We haven’t had a market contraction in a long time, so we’re due for one. He didn’t seem to think the recession was imminent, but perhaps later in 2018 / into 2019. (I am not a financial professional, so take all of this with a grain of salt.)
I actually like the explanation I just heard on NPR…… one expert suspected that with all of the computer algorithm driven trading down by large investment players, that certain market forces/changes may actually trigger some of these programs to start selling. Everyone has been saying it has to go down at some point. Rather than people freaking out this time and deciding to get out, the computers may have made that decision for themselves …..
Dress Advice Please
Maybe too late in the day, but need some help – heading to NOLA for conference in a week. In a hotel all day long. Black tights (my go-to in winter with dresses) okay or too dark?
It’s probably in the 60s or 70s there now with humid showers – black tights are a rarity in much of the south, doubly so when it’s warm and rainy. Do you have ankle pants? That’d probably be the best option.
Dang. Hoping it was different!
Thanks for reply – will take your advice and switch.
If you’re in a hotel conference room and not going outside, wear tights if you like. I usually find conference rooms in the South freezing cold. It’s not going to be cold enough for them outside though, so there might not be that many other people wearing them. Pants will be more common.
Another NOLA Girl
The weather is fluctuating a lot right now. Sometimes hot and sometimes cold. I wear black tights all the time in the winter with boots and a dress. The good thing about a dress is you can wear without tights if it’s warm. Bring the tights, don’t wear them if it’s hot.
It’s a good friend’s bday tomorrow and she could use some cheering up. What can I send her so last minute? I’d normally do flowers but she’s leaving on weekend trip Thursday. I was thinking a plant but not sure what would have good options. Other ideas?
I looked into that $6 cookie delivery but it schedules for a week out from the date of order. . . do they end up arriving faster than that? I think it’s a great gift idea for people having a bad day but waiting a week negates that.
You have to schedule it in advance, at least where I live. It was going to take like a week to deliver.
Anon in NYC
Check out Cheryl’s Cookies – not sure if that’s the one, but they have a similar service.
Can you Seamless dessert from somewhere local to her? You’d have to ruin a bit of the surprise by making sure she’ll be home but I bet most people would love that.
Where is your friend located? In DC you can have cookies, wine, etc delivered same day. Depending on her location you can also do same day or next day Amazon, which opens up a lot of options. For cookies, I typically order from Insomnia because it is close to my house and many of my friends, but if you google it, there are several options.
She’s in Port Washington, NY, so no Insomnia or other easy options, and Cheryl’s Cookies etc., won’t deliver tomorrow… maybe I’ll just Yelp a local florist and send a plant.
Thank you for the ideas!
Anon for this
That’s where I live! Falconer florist will deliver the same day. Unfortunately, I can’t think of any bakery that delivers. There is a Whole Foods in the next town (zip 11030) that you can Instacart from. A liquor store will deliver – Black Tie Liquors on Shore Rd. – but not sure if they’d do it for one bottle of wine. Page me tomorrow if you need more help!
Anon in NYC
I think an electronic gift card might be your best option here. Ones that immediately come to mind: Seamless or Airbnb. Another idea is a food basket with non-perishable items or items she could take on her trip (cookies, Harry and David basket, etc.).
Edible Arrangement! You could do the strawberries or apple slices
I do not know where she lives, but Insomnia Cookies can do same day delivery
Lana Del Raygun
And they are DELICIOUS.
Ftd has Shari’s berries for same day delivery. Plus they give a pretty decent skymiles reward if you’re into that…
I discovered that my 2yo daughter and I have lice, thanks to an out of town trip where we interacted with some school age kids. My daughter does not go to preschool, and my son has short hair and does not appear to have it either. I am a little horrified and my babysitter and I have been doing daily comb outs (1-2 lice and nits each day) for both of us.
My question is – are these enough to gradually kill off any remaining nits and extinguish the remaining lice, or should I opt for more stringent treatments?
I know there are strong shampoos (I use Fairy Tales but clearly that is more prevention than treatment). I also see good Yelp reviews of an Air Alle treatment that uses hot air to suction up lice and eggs, but they wont treat children under 4. Should I undergo the treatment myself though, and how should we time it with the kiddo’s treatment? We washed all linens in hot water but again the timing matters and we still have lice, so it’ll have to be repeated.
Please call your child’s doctor. Really.
Never too many shoes...
Sorry, are you asking if the combing is enough to get rid of the lice? Because that answer is a hard no. It sucks, but get some lice/nit killing treatment and put it on your heads.
Lots of cities have companies that will treat for you. even on little kids so you might consider that option.
This is just nonsense. The combing absolutely is enough to get rid of the lice. It takes a long time and you have to be consistent, but as long as you do it regularly enough to pick the lice out before they’re old enough to lay eggs, you’ll get there in the end.
I feel for you. We only had lice once in our house but it was really memorable and not in a good way.
Lice are increasingly immune to the over the counter poison remedies. We had the best luck adopting the combing schedule on the most popular website in the uk, which I will post separately. It is essential to follow the schedule exactly and to get an extra fine toothed comb.
It was not easy. My kids were in upper middle school, and both of them have thick hair. My daughter’s hair is curly (3b) and long so it took forever, and of course both kids absolutely hated my guts while I was combing. But we got it done.
We also used tea tree oil hair products during the outbreak and continued to use them after we got rid of the lice. I actually think they helped.
If you can’t bear the thought of doing the combing yourself, take your daughter to a nit picker. They are usually really good and will basically sell you a package of treatments on the right schedule.
Oh I really do feel for you! But remember this is not a sign of uncleanliness. Lice actually prefer really clean hair.
Go to a clinic that combs through. They will get it done right. Then go for a check a couple days later–they’ll tell you when. It can be pricy but it’s worth it. The shampoo does not kill the nits and if one is left behind it’ll continue the nightmare. They can’t live for more than 24 hours away from the host, your head. So it’s not necessary to boil the entire contents of your home–which is what I almost did. Thanks kid of person I was hanging out with.
Thank you to those who responded. Anon 6:00 please post the schedule you mentioned. It sounds like you did the regular combing alone and got rid of them that way?
Yes, I’m asking if repeated combing and extraction of lice/nits on a schedule will be enough, or if anyone has had experience (1) doing the harsher shampoo treatments on such a young child or (2) doing the hot air vacuum treatment. Or if the lice went away without either of these?
Also asking how I should time the vacuum treatment for myself with the washing and the shampoo on the child i.e. it seems like everything should occur on the exact same day to avoid re-infestation.
Did the hot air treatment after my nieces and nephews shared, and haven’t had an issue since. Absolutely worth every penny I paid.
The hot air place also did more the standard chemical-y treatments for younger kids, I think. Call the place and ask them what their best idea is-they’re the experts, and believe me, it’s worth paying them.
But yeah…you have to treat this, the sooner the better. Do not let it go another day without dealing with it.
And no, just doing the combing will not get rid of them, from everything I read. Chemicals or the hot air must be involved. Make sure your husband and son get checked, and you and your daughter should be wearing your hair pulled back in the meantime.
The hot air treatment is the best. I would call them, explain the ages of your children, and bring them in. The hot air treatment includes hot air, nit picking, and then an oil treatment to suffocate anything that’s left. I suspect that they would do the nit picking and oil treatment on your child. They will want to see your whole family at once to confirm that your husband and son aren’t carrying lice. (Even short hair can attract lice.)
I would not bother with any of the chemical toxins. They don’t work and lice are resistant to them anyway.
You do need to get everyone cleaned at the same time. I would have the whole family treated, then (while wearing your oil treatments and shower caps), come home and do all the laundry and cleaning. I just bought brand new hairbrushes for everyone.
Good luck. Lice is the worst but that Air Alle treatment has totally knocked it out for us every time (and we’ve been cursed with three rounds in three years!). The first time this happened, we used shampoos and combing on a daily basis for MONTHS before we finally realized that it was not working and went to Air Alle. They solved the problem for us 100%.
Here’s the schedule
Random question for the lawyers with business-owner spouses: Do you keep track of your spouse’s business clients for your own conflict checking purposes?
Kat, if you are evaluating cleansing balms, you cannot make a final judgement before you try Banila Co’s Clean it Zero – best seller, cult class, and holy grail for many. It’s spawned plenty of imitators but still has no equal to this day. Seriously, it’s just around $15 bucks too.