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Updated: Aug 19, 2020 113 Comments · by

Suit of the Week: McQueen

Suit of the Week

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For busy working women, the suit is often the easiest outfit to throw on in the morning. In general, this feature is not about interview suits for women, which should be as classic and basic as you get — instead, this feature is about the slightly different suit that is fashionable, yet professional.

Ooh: I'm loving this suit from Alexander McQueen. The peplum detail, the almost architectural cut of the pockets, the general sleek and sophisticated look. Gorgeous, gorgeous. The blazer is available for preorder right now for $2350; the matching pants are $795. 

Happy Wednesday!

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Sales of note for 9.30.24

And some of our latest threadjacks here at Corporette (reader questions and commentary) — see more here!

Some of our latest threadjacks include:

About Kat

Kat Griffin is the founder, publisher, and editor-in-chief of Corporette. You can read more about her here.

Comments

      • Senior Attorney

        With an amazing little hat with a little veil just over the eyebrows.

    • Anonymous

      God grief this is gorgeous. I’d love it on a bride. Or anyone really.

      • Ellen

        ME TOO! I just need to find a guy willing to marry me and believe me, I would wear this! It also looks like what a nurse would wear, and that is very s-xy!

    • Maudie Atkinson

      Oh my goodness, yes. This is stunning.
      It makes me almost regret what I bought to wear to my (now backyard, 15 attendee) wedding in October! The “almost” is only true because it’s about 6x what I actually spent.

  2. Anonymous

    To the person asking about shopping sales/wardrobe reset – if I was just starting out, virtual environment, and had $200-300 and no work clothes, I would watch ann taylor sales and buy

    1) two full suits (blazer/dress/skirt/pant combos, if no dresses or skirts, 2 pr matching pants) in colors like black, navy, or gray ($75/ensemble on super sale),

    2) one extra blazer that went with most of my blouses, ($20)

    3) five shirts ($50 total),

    4) two pants, maybe one Ponte/comfy, neutral colors ($40 total).

    Maybe one nice looking pair of earrings or necklace.

    I would take most calls with a nice top, simple jewelry, and blazer or suit jacket visibly draped on the chair behind me. First three weeks I’d wear real dress, pants or skirt for every call. Likely quickly transition to black ponte pants or leggings with a nice top until I knew whether I’d be visible standing and/or have to stand often.

    When no longer WFH, you have classic color basics you can wear at first while you evaluate comfort and tends.

    • Anon

      What style pants for suits are most common/acceptable now e.g traditional bootcut/straight or slimmer/cropped/ankle? Guessing it depends on formality and field.

      • Anon

        Whatever fits you best. Work pants can easily be frumpy.

        That being said, my office is a business casual law office. Most common pants are slim ankle pants that can also be worn with a jacket if necessary. My work pants are a mix of the Everlane work pant and J Crew Cameron Pant. I am in a mid-size SEUS city, and this is about what most women my age (30ish) wear.

    • Anon

      When was this? Because I can’t imagine buying any of those items for the prices you’ve listed, unless it’s from the clearance rack at Forever21 or something. Definitely not anything work appropriate.

      • anon

        Yeah I buy AT sale all the time and shirts, even on deep discount, are still at least $15-20. I’ve never seen those kinds of prices and I’m a veteran.

      • Mrs. Jones

        +1. I shop at resale stores a lot and can’t find these work items at these prices.

        • op

          I get it! I think COVID really drove these prices down, the women’s charity I donate to resells tops for $10/each. I told them last week I had a pile of new tops from Loft and Ann Taylor that I bought for $6/each.

      • op

        Ann Taylor and similar brands (Banana Republic, similar dept. brands, plus all their outlet sister stores) have 70-90% off sales right now! They advertise as “flash sales” sometimes but during COVID I’ve purchased four full Ann Taylor suits (jacket, pant, skirt, and matching dress) for less than $120/ensemble, because I know I’ll be in suits long term, and a huge number of winter pieces (dresses, sweater jackets, wool pieces, leather boots) for 70-80% off at department store clearance sales online. I happen to know I can buy “final sale” items in my size – usually for $5-15 – and 90% of them will fit fine or with minimal tailoring, the other 10% I donate to a women’s charity with tags.

        For a judicial clerk working virtual, perfect tailoring wouldn’t be required, and neutral basics would go a long way. Ann Taylor’s new suiting right now is on sale for 60-70% off full price depending on the day of the week, and has been this way for about a month.

        Check it out, it’s totally doable!

      • FFS

        Yeah, even a super sale at Ann Taylor would easily be double the prices suggested for each piece.

      • pugsnbourbon

        I mean, I’ve bought work-appropriate tops for $10, but not at Ann Taylor or even Loft. Macy’s on clearance or Target, sure.

        As for sales – I just checked suiting prices at AT Factory and BR Factory. There’s a gray houndstooth suit and a charcoal suit that are each about $75 for two pieces. The black and navy suiting sets are higher. There’s also a really nice-looking sheath dress that comes to $20 with a coupon code, but it’s only available in 10 and 14. Shells are $30-$40. I might try Gap for tops to wear under the suit to get a lower price point.

        BR Factory has “Avery” slim ankle pants for $20; blazers are in the $60-$70 range.

      • Kate

        I was a lucky sale shopper last month! My Loft Outlet closed so everything was 75% off (in person). I also picked up several sheath dresses online Ann Taylor for about $20-25 each, and got lucky with a new navy suit for super cheap. I signed up for emails so I was ready to pounce before sizes got picked over. I have a ton of clothing so this was all “nice to have.” If I was a new clerk I might try Target or Gap if it’s all virtual, honestly. Quality of a black blazer is pretty hard to see on Zoom!

    • Anonymous

      I disagree with the advice on how to dress for video calls. Nobody stands on video calls, and dresses can rumple. A jacket on the back of the chair looks sloppy. Wear a simple top with a blazer for video calls until you see how everyone else is dressing.

      • Anonymous

        My state appellate courts actually required people to stand while the judge “signed on” and then everyone was seated. Nuts.

        Agree re: blazer, at least for hearings. If it’s with your internal court team discussing assignments, my clerkship we would regularly leave the jacket in the cubicle and discuss in person with just button down/ties or nice top for females. Might ask an outgoing clerk how they handled during the spring.

  3. Leatty

    How do leather sofas/sections hold up to small children and pets? We have a 5 year old cloth sofa that has not held up well (and the arms are all scratched up from two cats who have since passed), and we are considering whether to make this one work until the kids are older or bite the bullet and get a new couch. If we get a new one, we would go for a leather one so its easier to clean up pet hair.

    Also, any recommendations for a leather sectional with a chaise?

    • Veronica Mars

      It depends on the type of leather and quality of leather used. We’re buying one from CoCoCo (comfortable couch company based out of NC) and our sales rep said they have some leathers that are so scratch resistant you could run your keys over them. I’m waiting on some swatches so we’ll see, but there is a whole range of how the leather is treated and what it’s best for. More delicate leather would definitely get scratched up.

      • Cat

        +1, you can still see that my brother liked to kneel on top of the leather chair in my parents’ den when he was playing computer games, because his toenails scratched an arched pattern on the seat!

    • Beaglelover

      We switched to leather eight years ago and so glad, so much easier to clean than a woven fabric. Five beagles later, it still looks good!

        • Beaglelover

          I was there, and I gave it my best shot, but even I have to admit that beagles are stubborn, and occasionally loud. Very loud. We have done pretty well with lots of training and lots of good luck in getting sweet-disposition dogs. And I will never not have a beagle or two, but not in an apartment!

    • Anonymous

      We don’t have a leather couch (yet) but we have two enormous leather chairs that have held up really well to dogs and kids. There are definitely scratches and marks at this point, but they have a lovely patina and look far better than the (more recently purchased) linen couch.

    • Anon

      I have a 30 year old leather sofa. It looks broken in up close but it still a completely fine couch and still looks absolutely great from 5 feet away. There is absolutely no way I could have held onto a fabric sofa this way.

      The couch has weathered:

      Three moves
      Three babies, now late teens though adults
      One large dog
      Too many cats to count
      Many guests
      Many parties
      Spills
      Kittens tearing around on it, claws out
      One Cub Scout playing with his new pocket knife

      I have no plans to replace it anytime soon!

      • Anon

        (Eight cats. It wasn’t actually too many to count. No more than two at a time lest you think I am a crazy cat lady)

        • anonymous

          Crazy cat lady here with five cats – I’m not concerned about them using leather couches a scratching post. However, did they ever mark up the leather when they jumped on/off the couches? Mine occasionally like to do parkour off the furniture.

          • Anon

            Yes I have a few scratches but most of them are very surface and they just sort of blend in to the weathered-ness.

            Much less than the Cub Scout knife damage.

      • eertmeert

        Our 20+ year old leather couch and chair/ottoman combo my parents bought at MAcy’s in the late 90’s has gotten intense daily use. The chair is doing fine, but the couch started to lose its cushion structure in teh past year, mostly becuase my husband only uses one of the 3 seats.
        It’s also been through a lot of abuse before we got it from my parents about 8 years ago.
        Will only ever buy leather seating, our cats don’t scratch the leather and it is comfy and holds up well.

    • Anonymous

      Oh but I don’t think the leather would be comfortable. Maybe that’s just me? It kind of sticks to me in shorts and I’m worried your pets will scratch it. Have you looked into the performance fabrics? Probably not pricier than leather. I’ve hear slipcover are great for some families but, tbh, I never wash mine bc they are such a pain to take off.

      • Anonymous

        I’m with you, Anon at 2:54. I can best describe it as “cold” to sit on, it’s sticky, and not welcoming.

        I keep reading that people use outdoor fabric (like sunbrella) to upholster indoor furniture and that is a great option because you can clean it easily.

    • Mrs. Jones

      I LOVE our leather sofa with one kid and two dogs. Get a darker color.

      • Kat in VA

        +1 on darker color.

        We have a largeish leather sectional in our den that we bought four years ago. It has four recliners and a corner section. It’s held up very well against four kids (22, 17, 15, 11), the husband and me, and two dogs.

        The only caveat is that with leather (even decent-to-good leather) the “favorite” seat will become evident over time. Unfortunately, The Favorite Seat® happens to be “my” seat, so the leather is looser and more baggy than the rest of the (more taut) seats on the couch because everyone sits in my recliner.

        However, IMHO, leather is wildly comfortable. If you’re worried about sticking in shorts (I live in the DC area, super humid), you can either sit on a light throw or just give it a minute or two. The leather warms up and stops sticking after you’ve sat for a few moments (just like the leather seats in a car).

    • Anonymous

      We bought our leather sofa for durability reasons when my son was about 7 and we got a dog, and it has exceeded my expectations (son is in early twenties, dog RIP, now it’s surviving a cat). Agree with Veronica Mars — delicate soft leather will get scratched up. Mine is Mitchell and Gold and a fairly thick leather and had a distressed finish which is now just a bit more distressed. The finish and look of the leather it is very like the Restoration Hardware Roarke sofa (although the style is more modern). It’s survived the family eating on it, the dog sneakily sleeping on it (not allowed!) and the cat’s a hellion and runs all over it. Would buy again. The one issue I could see is that that kind of leather (distressed or not) tends to come more in a ye olde English or traditional style which may not suit you— M&G don’t make that sofa any more.

    • Amber

      If you decide to keep your current sofa for a while, I highly recommend the “Easy Going Stretch Slipcover” on Amazon (under $25!). I bought this several months ago and it is great – it doesn’t slip off and is machine washable! We have a cat and 2 young kids so I am trying to make our sofas last for a while!

    • In-House in Houston

      We have 2 Natuzzi leather sofas that are SO comfortable and stand-up to our dogs jumping on them all the time. We’ve had them for 10+ years and not so much as a rip or puncture (and my dogs have long and hard nails). So I think it depends on the quality of the leather and construction of the sofa. They are so easy to clean because the dog hair just slides right off. The bad thing (but this happens with non-leather sofas too) is that dog hair gets stuck between the cushions so sometimes there’s a lot of gross dog hair between them. But hey, we have dogs. Deal with it!

    • Anonny

      Ex BF had a jennifer convertibles(?) “leather” couch and the back claws of my very sweet cat killed it. He didn’t mean to do it. It was when he was pouncing off. You need to get GOOD, durable leather not the cheap kind.

    • anononon

      +1 for leather sofas! We’ve had them from Omnia Leather (custom, made in california, incredibly high quality construction and leathers, non-insane price point), and they honestly still look brand new 5+ years later. The sales rep helped us pick a leather that would be durable for family/dog life. Our large dog (with large nails to match) is allowed on the couch and frequently gets the zoomies, but hasn’t left any marks on the couches. That said, our pup doesn’t dig, or scratch like a cat, so YMMV.

  5. fashion sneaker fit

    How are fashion sneakers supposed to fit? I am a 7.5 – 8 in dress shoes, 39 in Birks, 8.5 in running shoes, with narrow feet. With fashion sneakers in unisex sizing, American or European, I can never seem to get the size right. In size 38 (European) or 8 (US), my big toe hits the rubber. In the next size up (39 or 8.5), my foot is swimming. I always thought that your toes weren’t supposed to touch the end of the shoe to avoid bunions, but when I size up enough to avoid that, there’s just so much extra space in the toe box. I have tried so many brands–Converse, Veja, P448, Cariuma, Superga–and they all have the same issue.

    I don’t have the same problem with running shoes. There is a thumb’s width of space between the end of my toes and the rubber, but it doesn’t feel so cavernous and boxy. Is the fact that the fashion sneakers are designed for men’s wide feet the problem? Should I be going for the smaller size or the larger size?

    • Ribena

      They just are roomy. I wear New Balance 373s as my casual sneaker and they are roomy around the toes – my Converse likewise. I wear a UK 7.5-8 in Converse (usually a 7.5 in low top and an 8 in high top I think?) and an 8 in the New Balances. I did try on the size down when I last replaced my New Balances and it turned out my old ones weren’t too big, they were just falling apart. I have a really low-volume foot (high arch, low instep) through the instep and heel and I like that both of those shoes allow me to tie the laces tight enough to compensate.

    • Cat

      I have a similar issue with fashion sneakers. I have found the Cole Haan Grandpro line to be perfect for my relatively narrow heels but average toe box. I take the larger of my half-sizes so for you the 8.5 would likely be best.

  6. Anon

    This reminds me of when we all wore pantsuits and voted for Hillary and now I want to cry. Again.

      • Anonymous

        Agree. I only use fondant in molds, not rolled out, but the corn starch has worked really well to prevent sticking.

    • Anon

      Your rolling pin is trying to tell you that buttercream or cream cheese frosting will taste better :)

      Sorry – I know some people LOVE decorating with fondant. But I’m a taste-first cake girl, so I go with the messier, more delicious options.

        • Anon

          Maybe it’s just me, but I think marshmallow fondant is good. The gross fondant you get in cans at craft stores is not. You also put other frosting under the fondant.

    • Anon

      I don’t have fondant expertise but whenever I roll dough I always roll it out between two sheets of plastic wrap. It’s so much easier.

      • pugsnbourbon

        If the fondant is super sticky, I wonder if two pieces of parchment paper would work too.

    • Anonymous

      Is it hot and humid where you are? I find marshmallow fondant tricky in summer weather.

    • Humidity

      I’ve made a similar recipe without problems. I’ll second the poster who suggested humidity might be a problem. Seriously, I live like a lizard in 79F rooms, but I turn on the AC on when I’m baking certain things just to decrease the humidity in the air.

  8. Should I tell her?

    I have a friend who broke up with her long-term boyfriend about a year ago. We all went to law school together, work in the same city, and move in the same circles so she will definitely be seeing him once the pandemic is over. I just found out from a mutual friend that he got engaged last weekend. I suspect this is going to sting for her since one of the reasons they broke up was his “refusal to commit” and because she just turned 35 and is not happy with where her life is.

    If it was me, I would want to be told privately (and preferably not in person) so I could get being upset out of the way before finding out in public so my inclination is to give her a call this evening and let her know but I thought I would run it by all of you for thoughts. I do not know anything about his fiancee so could not share any details even if I wanted to.

    • Anonymous

      I would assume she already knows since she’s in the same circle as you & still friends with the guy.

      • Should I tell her?

        Oh – I was not clear. THEY are not still friends. And by same circles, I mean that we all belong to the same Bar Association and alumni association. In other words if we lived in a world where we were still having holiday parties and Bar Association CLE events, we would definitely all expect to see each other. I suppose the question is whether I say nothing and let her find out organically. (Or from someone who would take great joy in telling her just to report to everyone on how she reacted – and yes, we do know some of those.)

        I have no interest in being the town crier. It is just that (like I said) I would want to find out something like that in the privacy of my own home and with no witnesses. But if people think it would seem interfering I won’t do it.

    • Anon

      You know your friend and we don’t, but I’m wondering why you think she will react this way. I broke up with a long-term boyfriend at 34 because of his refusal to commit; that was ultimately driven by an understanding that if we were the right people for each other, he would have put a ring on it.

      My own story had a happy ending: my friend set me up with her friend whom she had long thought I was perfect for, and we’re now married with a baby.

      • Should I tell her?

        I suppose because she does not talk about it in terms of “if I was the right person, he would marry me” but “he is so immature and unready to commit that he is never going to be ready.” We had a lot of late night conversations about Peter Pan Syndrome and how he was going to be one of those men who gets married at 50. She agonized over their break up but ultimately decided she did not have time to wait for someone who was not ready.

        I complete agree that “not ready to commit” usually includes a qualifier of “to you”. But that is not how SHE is looking at it. And completely agree that it was for the best and think she will too but in the short term I suspect the fact that he proposed to someone else after less than a year after dating her for a decade is going to hurt.

      • Ellen

        I want a friend like you had– I need to set up with a boyfreind who will marry me. The schlub I had only wanted to use me for s-x, and believe me, I got wore out by his constant huffeing and puffeing, even tho the s-x was lousy. If I could guarantee a husband out of it, I would not object to the s-x every day. But not from the schlub I had on top of me within 5 minutes of walking in the door every day. FOOEY on all of that!

    • Monday

      My friend had information about my ex-husband, and said “I have some information about XH, would you like me to tell you?” I appreciated that. Yes, of course it creates some suspense, and some people wouldn’t be able to resist, but an engagement is the kind of news that is going to come to her in some way regardless. She can either discuss it with a friend now, or find out on social media or through others later.

      I agree with you that hearing it individually from a friend would be preferable, hence your offer to tell her. I also agree that if she’s unhappy with her current life, and he wouldn’t commit to her during a LTR but is now engaged to someone else after a year or less of dating, it’s reasonable to anticipate that she might be upset.

    • Been There

      How good of friends are you? If you are very good friends, then I do think you should tell her via text (could use the same language proposed above letting her know you found something out about her ex and ask if she’d like to know). If you are not very good friends, I don’t think you should say anything. I can’t tell from the info above, but you might be in the very good friend category since the two of you seem to have talked extensively about the relationship and break up.

      My story– My ex husband left me for another woman. I stopped following him on social media, etc., and asked a couple of very good friends to give me updates that they thought I’d want to know for the same reasons you articulate (engagement, marriage, kids, parents passing away). Unfortunately, some of my friends-but-not-good-friends also stayed friends with him on social media. When they got engaged and then married, I got a lot of texts from people just wanting me to know. I do not think any of these people were delighting in telling me and they had good intentions, but it made me feel terrible. Feeling like everyone knew and was talking about it and me was painful.

    • El

      I think it would be a kindness to tell her, but (and this may add to the awkwardness, so ymmv) if it were me, I would send her a note, instead of calling her. I would send her a letter or card in the mail with general pleasantries (perhaps a joke about supporting the postal service) and then gently tell her about the ex’s engagement with encouraging words like, “no matter how happy or satisfied we are with the path we chose, these moments tend to prompt a reflection on the road not taken and I wanted you to have any space you might need for that in private, in your own time, rather than trying to manage the news in a more public setting” and reaffirm how much she means you to.

      That way you’re not ambushing her on a phone call, she doesn’t have to process it with you (and you don’t get drawn into a conversation about it), you can set the tone and intention very clearly with out making assumptions about how she might feel about it, etc.

      • Been There

        I’d MUCH prefer a text to a letter, personally. It’s a lovely idea to send a handwritten card to a friend with pleasantries, but I’d be so excited to open this and then for it to have upsetting news would be a lot to deal with. I most appreciated the texts that were similar to, “This is awkward and I don’t know how to say it best, but I just learned that X got engaged and I thought you’d want to know from a friend instead of running into them.”

        Obviously YMMV and this is highly dependent on the person.

      • shark

        Ew no, I wouldn’t want to get new like this via mail. I’d be so excited to get a surprise card from a friend, only to find it contained upsetting news? No thanks.

      • Anon

        Oof. I would hate this. Like Hate.

        It’s a very know your friend. You have lots of advice here to sift through. Take the advice that resonates best with you. This isn’t one size fits all.

      • Anonymous

        I think the words on this are really, really good, but I’d put it in an email. I’d prefer hearing it that way over a call or text where it would be more pressure to respond. I’d want to know if it were me.

  9. Rachel

    I’m cooking more fish and shellfish dishes since I can microwave leftovers with impunity while working from home. A very small silver lining but it makes me chuckle each time I reheat some fish curry or shrimp pasta. Anyone else switching up their cooking habits?

    • Anon

      If by “switching up your cooking habits” you mean regularly eating ice-cream as a mid-afternoon snack, then yes.

    • Coach Laura

      Yes, I love fish curry and won’t use the microwave. I like cold salmon and will eat leftover shrimp cold but otherwise don’t take fish to work, so I do like having a hot fish meal for lunch. Actually, eating a good lunch – leftovers or not – is one of the perks of wfh that I love. I don’t use my crock pot anymore since I got my instant pot, but I can use the slow cooker function if I want or get a head start on dinner by cooking beans in the instant pot. And in the fall, beef pot roasts which still take 60-90 minutes in the instant pot to get them melty-soft like I prefer them

      • Rachel

        Yes! I love being able to get things started for dinner during the day. Forgot to soak the beans? Throw them in in the morning. Need to let something cool? Make it at lunch and pop it in the fridge. So handy.

  10. Anonymous

    Who has thought about their winter planning? I live in a state that has a long winter, and I’m trying to get myself out of COVID funk by…basically imagining quarantining this winter. Other than rituals/routines, which I want anyway (workout, really nice hot cocoa on hand, lots of books) I’m not sure what to look forward to or how I can make home cozy and wonderful. I live alone, FWIW.

    • Anonymous

      I am looking forward to full-on hygge this winter. Candles, baking, walks, stews, pumpkin everything, cozy throws, fuzzy socks, outdoor firepit, puzzles, board games. I am even going to get our ugly gas fireplace repaired so we can use it.

    • anon

      Check out the Little Book of Hygge. It talks about making your home cozy. If I were you, I’d focus on cozy throw blankets, slippers, comfy sweatshirts, yummy smelling candles, put up some fun string lights and/or those twinkle lights. But also, do you have any desire to be out in the weather? Maybe invest in a super warm jacket/coat + gloves and a hat and boots if there is a lot of snow, so you can go on walks and get out of the house every once in awhile.

      Oh, also, apple cider crockpot recipes exist and they make your house smell amazing.

    • Anon

      I’ll be on maternity leave, so I’m going to Christmas the sh*t out of our house. All the fresh greenery. All the white twinkly lights. Maybe a second, smaller tree upstairs in the nursery since we’ll be spending so much time there.

      • Coach Laura

        My infant brother had an asthma reaction to the cut tree outside his bedroom and ended up in the ER. A live, potted tree in the nursery might be safer. They have mold, too, so that might also be an issue.

      • Anonymous

        Oh, good point. I usually run out of Christmas season and put my tree too late. This year maybe I’ll be more motivated to decOrate early since I’ll be home for it

    • Small Law Partner

      I bought a treadmill now largely because once daylight savings ends, it will be impossible for me to run after work outside. I live in SoCal and am still dreading winter coming due to lack of light.
      We also plan to go whole hog for the holidays – tons of decorating and food projects.

    • pugsnbourbon

      I am. I hate hate hate winter and being locked down does not bode well for my mental health.
      I think I’m going to invest in good snow/hiking boots, another pair of insulated pants, and a couple base layers so I can still get outside and walk. Also some chunky sweaters.
      Stocking up on houseplants now so I’ll have something green to look at.

    • Aaaaaaa

      Given my many years of suffering through winter with SAD, I’m so glad I gave up on the Northeast and moved back South. If relocating is a possibility for you, even temporarily, winter is a great time to try a new spot.

    • Anonymous

      I’d invest in warm outerwear if I were you. I think of all of the places now where I have to wait outside or do questions/temp checks outside and it’s fine now in the warm weather, but it will be brutal in the winter.

    • JB

      I bought more lights. I really need bright light during the day and short winter days are tough especially without the overheard florescent bulbs at work (something I never thought I would miss). Also planning to getting up and go outside in the morning to get some sunlight before the day starts.

    • PolyD

      I am actually hoping to get outside MORE in the winter! Here in DC, we just got out of a month of temperatures near 100 with accompanying nasty-ass humidity. Thee were whole weeks when I maybe went outside for a walk once or twice. In my opinion, it rarely gets too cold here to go outside.

      You do have a point about darkness. I got a set of string lights to put on my balcony, but now I am thinking maybe I won’t bother putting them there and instead will figure out a way to string them around my living room to get more light in the winter.

      • Carmen Sandiego

        Same re: outside! I can’t wait until it’s actually pleasant to sit on the patio or take a walk. Right now I suffer through if I have to, but I’m ready to embrace some cooler temps and lower humidity!

    • anon winter lover

      My home office is a converted garage, and I’m fully planning to put a little wood stove in, partly for heat (I’m in a cold climate), but mostly really for the hygge factor. I love the idea of taking Zoom calls with a crackling fire behind me.

      Aside from that I’m getting backcountry skis (questionable whether I’ll visit the ski resorts, but we have lots and lots of backcountry terrain. I’ve taken the level 1 avalanche course and will stay on low angle terrain only) and will probably ice climb too (although that does require some car pooling and touching the same gear, but I’ll do it with a few select friends).

      • Anon

        Where do you live? I’m in CA looking for low-angle terrain too, but I fear that this year will have even more of an explosion of backcountry skiers looking for distancing…

        • anon winter lover

          Montana :)
          I think the CA backcountry is going to be incredibly crowded this winter. That makes me nervous about people going into high consequence terrain without the right tools and knowledge.

    • Is it Friday yet?

      I also bought backcountry skis so I can get out one way or another. I’d mainly be going in New England, so avalanches aren’t a thing (plus I’d be going with my brother, who has taken avvy 1 and possibly his current girlfriend who has tons of BC experience). Though I swear this is the season I will make it back to Tuckerman’s Ravine! Ice climbing is also within the realm of possibility…

    • Coach Laura

      I got a happy light and use that a lot. Sit it by your desk all day or sit in front of it at breakfast (depending on the type).

      I have one of those large gauge knit blankets that I love with a huge amount of joy. Also a sherpa blanket. A throw for the sofa and the bed are treats.

      I love using the peloton app and walking on treadmill/biking and seeing the scenic rides (Paris, Cinque Terre, Santiago Chile, Hawaii) sounds like a good way to workout inside in the winter.

      I’m going to get new cross-country ski gear. If that’s too much, try snowshoes or just winter hiking clothing would be good. Coming home to hot chocolate and curry is just the best feeling in winter.

    • Anon

      If it’s safe to do so, I hope to go skiing. Otherwise, I’ll look into cross-country skiing, winter camping, and snowshoeing. I love and can’t wait for winter.

  11. Elderlyunicorn

    I think it would be a kindness to tell her, but (and this may add to the awkwardness, so ymmv) if it were me, I would send her a note, instead of calling her. I would send her a letter or card in the mail with general pleasantries (perhaps a joke about supporting the postal service) and then gently tell her about the ex’s engagement with encouraging words like, “no matter how happy or satisfied we are with the path we chose, these moments tend to prompt a reflection on the road not taken and I wanted you to have any space you might need for that in private, in your own time, rather than trying to manage the news in a more public setting” and reaffirm how much she means you to.

    That way you’re not ambushing her on a phone call, she doesn’t have to process it with you (and you don’t get drawn into a conversation about it), you can set the tone and intention very clearly with out making assumptions about how she might feel about it, etc.

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