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Suit of the Week: Ted Baker London

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woman wears blue suit

For busy working women, the suit is often the easiest outfit to throw on in the morning. In general, this feature is not about interview suits for women, which should be as classic and basic as you get — instead, this feature is about the slightly different suit that is fashionable, yet professional. Also: we just updated our big roundup for the best women's suits of 2024!

This is such a pretty deep cornflower blue — and I love the very classic cut. The patch pockets feel like a fresh touch, but I can see how those wouldn't be everyone's cup of tea. The pants have a “tapered silhouette with vented hems.”

The blazer is $445, and the pants are $155, available in sizes 0-6 (fit like US sizes 2-14).

If you're hunting for colorful suits, note that light blue suits for summer are some of the easiest because you can wear them as you would a light gray suit. As of 2025, we're seeing nice ones at Reiss and Brooks Brothers. On the more affordable side, find blue suits at Ann Taylor, Banana Republic Factory, and Eloquii.

light blue pant suit
Banana Republic
light blue suit with dress instead of skirt
Brooks Brothers
a woman wears a dusty light blue suit
Ann Taylor
light blue skirt suit from Eloquii in cornflower blue
Eloquii

Sales of note for 3/10/25:

  • Nordstrom – Spring sale, up to 50% off
  • Ann Taylor – 40% off everything + free shipping
  • Banana Republic Factory – 40% off everything + 20% off
  • Eloquii – Extra 50% off all sale and select styles with code
  • J.Crew – 40% off everything + extra 20% off when you buy 3+ styles
  • J.Crew Factory – 50% off all pants & sweaters; extra 50% off clearance
  • M.M.LaFleur – Friends and family sale, 20% off with code; use code CORPORETTE15 for 15% off
  • Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
  • Talbots – Flash sale until midday 3/14: $50 off every $200 – combineable with other offers, including 40% off one item and 30% off everything else

171 Comments

  1. Norwex… the window cloth looks intriguing but the other cloths where you wipe chicken juice with only a cloth and water sounds too good to be true (and is obviously unsanitary). My friend is convinced by their silver technology though. Has anyone tried norwex?

    1. My sister loves, but for general household cleaning. Pretty sure she’s using soap for the chicken juice.

    3. I have two Norwex towels: the normal silver ion one and the glass one. I use them to clean the bathrooms or non-chicken-type kitchen cleanup. The glass one is amazing and obviates the need for Windex. They get tossed in the wash immediately after.

    4. Haven’t tried Norwex but we use microfiber cloths in the kitchen with just water for smudges/sticky stuff/general buffing. Anything oily/greasy or with potential disease (raw meat/blood/chicken) gets cleaned with a paper towel and hydrogren peroxide spray. We also keep alcohol wipes for wiping down probe thermometers/spice jars. I do appreciate that the cloths cut down our paper towel usage a solid 60-70%.

  2. UC Berkeley is next in line with offensive protesting. Reported chants (as reported in reputable local news, the SF Chronicle) include “intifada, intifada,” “say it loud and say it clear, we don’t want no Zionists here,” and that old chestnut, “from the river to the sea…” One Jewish student photographed a swastika sign. Also from that article: “We dare UC Berkeley to come arrest us!” a speaker wearing a Palestinian keffiyeh announced to the crowd. At the same time, many in the crowd covered their faces with the same scarves or with medical masks and declined to identify themselves to reporters.”

    I feel that these protests are giving the safest of harbors to actual neo-Nazis. They’ve found a welcoming atmosphere among students who do have some legitimate aims. I can’t understand why that legitimate group isn’t telling the swastika holder to gtfo. Why are they standing alongside him? Have their own beliefs progressed to the point of being accepting of Nazi symbols? Why isn’t there more backlash about this? Why is there more outrage about microaggressions like “why are you from” than about this?

    I also think it’s important for educated women around the country (the kind who gather here) to be aware of this. I’ve been so glad to see others posting on this subject and I’m glad to make a few posts too.

      1. So most protests are saying that it’s either all or partially about . . . divestment? Really? I feel like compared to the pictures / videos that I see, that doesn’t pass the laugh test.

    2. I am very pro-ceasefire and am horrified by how students are taking the opportunity to be totally out of bounds antisemitic. I graduated from a very progressive elite college a few years ago and “words can be violence” was a big talking point in terms of policing how people speak about race and gender. It seems like those same students now feel empowered to say literally anything they want for shock value. They are adults, not children, and they need to stop being coddled. They’re also too educated for this nonsense (or at least they should be at close to 100k a year). Sending lots of love to anyone triggered by these images and stories – this is a very small percentage of the campus body but it’s so, so awful.

      1. Right — where is my safe space? How are microaggressions threatening but actual aggressions just shrugged off?

      2. I agree. Elements of the left have lost credibility on free speech after YEARS of trying to shut down every opposing view (ranging from getting professors fired to excommunicating other students to calling the word woman offensive) and I hate hypocrisy. I personally support extremely robust free speech protections, including the right to say offensive or even hateful things, but I don’t believe it extends to shutting down classes, directly harassing or threatening individual students or groups of students, or drowning out opposing speakers with the heckler’s veto. John McWhorter, who is nothing if not a free speech advocate, wrote an op-ed yesterday correctly identifying the Columbia protests as having crossed the line into abuse. It seems that other schools are now as well.

          1. That is disingenuous. He said that the protesters beleive all Jews are white.

            “Conversations I have had with people heatedly opposed to the war in Gaza, signage and writings on social media and elsewhere and anti-Israel and generally hard-leftist comments that I have heard for decades on campuses place these confrontations within a larger battle against power structures — here in the form of what they call colonialism and genocide — and against whiteness. The idea is that Jewish students and faculty should be able to tolerate all of this because they are white.

            I understand this to a point. Pro-Palestinian rallies and events, of which there have been many here over the years, are not in and of themselves hostile to Jewish students, faculty and staff members. Disagreement will not always be a juice and cookies affair. However, the relentless assault of this current protest — daily, loud, louder, into the night and using ever-angrier rhetoric — is beyond what any people should be expected to bear up under, regardless of their whiteness, privilege or power.

            Social media discussion has been claiming that the protests are peaceful. They are, some of the time. It varies by location and day; generally what goes on within the campus gates is somewhat less strident than what happens just outside them. But relatively constant are the drumbeats. People will differ on how peaceful that sound can ever be, just as they will differ on the nature of antisemitism. What I do know is that even the most peaceful of protests would be treated as outrages if they were interpreted as, say, anti-Black, even if the message were coded, as in a bunch of people quietly holding up MAGA signs or wearing T-shirts saying “All lives matter.”

            And besides, calling all this peaceful stretches the use of the word rather implausibly. It’s an odd kind of peace when a local rabbi urges Jewish students to go home as soon as possible, when an Israeli Arab activist is roughed up on Broadway, when the angry chanting becomes so constant that you almost start not to hear it and it starts to feel normal to see posters and clothing portraying members of Hamas as heroes. The other night I watched a dad coming from the protest with his little girl, giving a good hard few final snaps on the drum he was carrying, nodding at her in crisp salute, percussing his perspective into her little mind. This is not peaceful.

            I understand that the protesters and their fellow travelers feel that all of this is the proper response, social justice on the march. They have been told that righteousness means placing the battle against whiteness and its power front and center, contesting the abuse of power by any means necessary. And I think the war on Gaza is no longer constructive or even coherent.

            However, the issues are complex, in ways that this uncompromising brand of power battling is ill suited to address. Legitimate questions remain about the definition of genocide, about the extent of a nation’s right to defend itself and about the justice of partition (which has not historically been limited to Palestine). There is a reason many consider the Israeli-Palestinian conflict the most morally challenging in the modern world.

            When I was at Rutgers in the mid-1980s, the protests were against investment in South Africa’s apartheid regime. There were similarities with the Columbia protests now: A large group of students established an encampment site right in front of the Rutgers student center on College Avenue, where dozens slept every night for several weeks. Among the largely white crowd, participation was a badge of civic commitment. There was chanting, along with the street theater inevitable, and perhaps even necessary, to effective protest; one guy even lay down in the middle of College Avenue to block traffic, taking a page from the Vietnam protests.

            I don’t recall South Africans on campus feeling personally targeted, but the bigger difference was that though the protesters sought to make their point at high volume, over a long period and sometimes even rudely, they did not seek to all but shut down campus life.

            On Monday night, Columbia announced that classes would be hybrid until the end of the semester, in the interest of student safety. I presume that the protesters will continue throughout the two main days of graduation, besmirching one of the most special days of thousands of graduates’ lives in the name of calling down the “imperialist” war abroad.

            Today’s protesters don’t hate Israel’s government any more than yesterday’s hated South Africa’s. But they have pursued their goals with a markedly different tenor — in part because of the single-mindedness of antiracist academic culture and in part because of the influence of iPhones and social media, which inherently encourage a more heightened degree of performance. It is part of the warp and woof of today’s protests that they are being recorded from many angles for the world to see. One speaks up.
            But these changes in moral history and technology can hardly be expected to comfort Jewish students in the here and now. What began as intelligent protest has become, in its uncompromising fury and its ceaselessness, a form of abuse.”

      3. Thank you for this. It really feels like a completely different standard for words against Jews. And the school administrators need to administrate- the Barnard email which in the same sentence said that professors should give flexibility to the suspended students and those who don’t feel safe going to campus….why exactly do they deserve the same level of flexibility? And it’s insulting and hurtful to even put that in the same sentence

      4. Thank you for this. I am genuinely starting to think that a group of people need to setup on a university campus dressed up like the KKK shouting “go back to Africa” and see what happens, so then there is hard evidence of the double standard.

        2. We all know that would be shut down within 20 minutes with mass suspensions/expulsions and firings of any staff who didn’t react fast enough. Committees would be set up and hate crime charges filed.

    3. “I can’t understand why that legitimate group isn’t telling the swastika holder to gtfo. Why are they standing alongside him?”

      Both the neo-Nazis and the pro-Palestine-Hamas/anti-Israel-Jews hate Jews. That explains why the protestors don’t tell the swastika holder to gtfo, and it explains why no one is holding the protestors to account. If the protestors wore white hoods and yelled slogans with the “n” word, that speech would be protected and schools would shut it down immediately anyway. Because this is Jew-hate, they get a pass.

    4. I just read that Columbia deactivated campus access for an Israeli professor who planned a counter sit-in. So it’s only one side actually being restricted.

    5. I am horrified by certain antisemitic chants and acts that I’ve heard about here, being part of the student protests. I do not believe, however, that all of the student protestors are anti semitic. I think there is also an active conflation of Jewish identity with Zionist principles, and that helps absolutely no one. 15 of the 85 students suspended at Columbia are Jewish. https://www.jewishvoiceforpeace.org/2024/04/22/statement-24-04-22/

  3. Help me choose between two jobs?

    Job A: My current job. Been there 3 years, in-house counsel at a well respected local company. Fully WFH, flexible. The nature of the work has changed a lot in the past year and I mostly do tedious admin work. I’m really bored and there is no room for growth. But it’s very flexible, and reasonably well paid considering I’m not working that hard.

    Job B: It seems like they are close to making me an offer. Large, international, well-respected company. Seems like more demanding work, but also more interesting and I would be a manager and team lead for my region. At least 2 days/week in the office. A bit more money, but not life-changing, although there should be more growth there as well. Benefits are slightly better, but again not life-changing.

    My thoughts: I’m tempted to take job B (if offered) because I’m really bored. I think going into the office would do me some good and I want to kick my career back into gear. This would be a more senior position at a more prestigious company. Everyone on the team seems smart and nice. The commute is reasonable. But I’m also worried about taking on a lot more work for not that much more money – the team was transparent about the fact that there are urgent deadlines and sometimes overtime is expected. I also have a dog and a toddler and will need to get childcare and a dog walker for in-office days and just juggle a bit more. Ultimately I realize I need to choose between my current chill-but-boring situation and a more demanding and stimulating option. But I welcome any thoughts on this!

    1. Nope. Job A and volunteer with a local cause I’m interested in – animals, museum, pick a nonprofit! So many would love to have you and your mental bandwidth :)

      1. 100% Keep job A. It’s a unicorn. Take a class for stimulation outside of work.

    2. I’m not a lawyer but recently made a similar choice between chill-but-boring job A and more demanding and stimulating job B. I chose job A. One thing to keep in mind is that while school age kids are easier and more fun in SO many ways than toddlers, it’s more complicated to secure full-time childcare once your oldest kid enters kindergarten. I love that I can be home with my kids after school, drive them to their various activities and chaperone their field trips while they still want me around.
      Like the poster above, outside of my family I find meaning in volunteer work. I’m in my kids’ schools several days a week (and plan to continue volunteering in their elementary school even after they graduate, because I love K-3 kids), lead a Girl Scout troop and coach a sport, help out at the public library and am on the list to be a baby snuggler in the NICU.

      1. I didn’t go to law school to check out of my career and be a baby snuggler during my prime working years personally. That’s for retirement. I would and did take option b no regrets. I spend too much time working to not like it.

        2. Completely agree. I also don’t get why you’d want to settle for being bored in a dead end job. B comes with a probability that you can get promoted, earn more and ultimately have more options. And I’m dying at 2 days a week with an easy commute is a problem. Don’t you want to leave the house? Act like a grownup? We used to do that every day. I could have run the world if I only needed to go in two days a week while raising kids. B sounds like a unicorn job I would take in a hot second.

    3. Job A, if you plan on having more kids.

      Job B if you want to double down on your career and have a really solid childcare situation for the next 5-7 years (local family!) and a spouse with a low key job.

    4. I would stick with job A, personally, and try to find something outside of work that is more interesting. If the pay at job B was significantly more, I might change my calculus.

    5. Thanks, all. I appreciate that my job is a bit of a unicorn in some ways. But am I the only one who gets kind of depressed in boring jobs? My day to day feels very tedious, and I feel a bit checked out at work. I do some volunteering and have hobbies but I don’t have that much time – current job is still a full-time gig and then I pick up my toddler. My job is flexible but I can’t be gone for hours every Tuesday afternoon or whatever to volunteer for a cause. I find WFH kind of lonely. But it’s possible we will want a second child and I’m wrestling with that and wondering if I would regret the move.

      1. I have a similar job as your job A and I do think it gets boring and tedious to do the everyday work. Sometimes I worry that I will lose my edge because it feels like I am not using my brain, and then something comes up and I can still turn it on. I don’t have any advice because I will sometimes daydream about switching to a more stimulating job too. But with two middle school kids and great benefits, etc, I am staying where I am. Let us know what you do!

      2. I’m the 2:29. I definitely understand your feeling. My job requires a lot less than 40 hours per week and since I work from home I can really put my time towards things that make me happy. I don’t think it would have been an easy choice if I had to spend 40 hours doing boring work.
        I still think childcare considerations are significant, especially if you want a second kid. I really did not anticipate how present I’d want to be during the elementary school years until I was in them.
        And I’m fundamentally opposed to more work for similar pay, but I realize not everyone shares that hang up.

      3. Do you feel that job A is secure–no rumblings of financial issues, job lines not being filled when people leave, or the like? My worry about choosing job A now is that you might be on the chopping block at some point in the future if finances tighten at your current firm, since you’re well-paid and not very highly utilized.

      4. I had Job A for years, and jumped into Job B. I have no regrets. I find meaning in other things, but having work that I find interesting and fulfilling is important to me.

      5. You are definitely not the only one! It’s a major source of unhappiness for me when my job is well and truly boring.

    6. Job C. Say no to Job B, use the extra time/mental space at Job A to find a job that is a more than “a bit more money”. That’s the real big difference for me. Or be prepared to walk away from Job B and try and negotiate them up. The job is going to absolutely change your life, so the pay/benefits should outweigh the additional responsibility and time. You kind of sound like you’re trying to talk yourself into Job B because it’s here, not because you’re definitely excited about it.

      Disclaimer: I’m not a lawyer and I’m also not super experience in switching jobs; I’m in senior management at a company I’ve been at for a long time. So admittedly I could be off base.

      1. Exactly. Don’t jump to B because you are not happy with A. It’s a false choice.

        1. I am a lawyer, in-house and B is a unicorn. It’s the job you hold out for and hope to get.

    7. There is no right answer. It depends on how much having a “bigger” career means to you

    8. For me, I’d do job B for the challenge and upward mobility. Getting good childcare is important. I see you didn’t mention a partner, but the dog and child issues should be equally your partner’s issues if there is a partner in the picture.

    9. I can’t have a boring job. I would not stay at Job A for years, but I would keep searching for more money.

    10. I left your A and found that I hopped into a financially struggling company with a challenging boss and several rounds of layoffs in the time i was there. ask A LOT of questions when you’re leaving comfort due to boredom.

      1. +100 to A.n.o.n at 6:06 about doing A LOT of due diligence.

        I don’t think that the choice between job A vs job B is necessarily about ambition vs. boredom — even though it’s certainly bringing up those issues for OP. Leaving an undemanding job for a challenging one with overtime that doesn’t really pay more is a big decision. We don’t know enough about either company, the people, the management, the financial prospects of the businesses.

        OP, it’s clear this choice is getting you to think about what’s important to you. I celebrate that, and encourage you to explore! Even if you’re bored at job A, you have other options, including using the bandwidth at job A to search for job C, or making interesting industry connections that could lead to unicorn job D.

    11. Wow. I thought this was a board for ambitious women but these replies…not the vibe.
      Job B all the way, OP.

      1. I think a lot of us “over achievers” are seriously burned out, especially post pandemic.

    12. I would pursue an option C. I left a boring Job A for what I thought was a better job but while the work is more engaging, I am actually not in the leadership role I was in because it’s a bigger company and more prestigious. So I am finding an option C. Also, I don’t have kids but I was fully remote in job A which means I could travel and have more flexibility while still working. Even though I was clear in my interviews that I was only expected to come in 5 times a year, now it’s the meaningful engagement conversation which just means more office time. That’s not what I want for my life. And like you, it basically amounted to very little in actual take home pay and my time is eaten up by meetings and things I don’t enjoy. I think you can be ambitious and find a good culture fit.

  4. How do you decide when the right time to move in with your partner is? I am 27, have been with my boyfriend for 3 years, and we’re committed to getting engaged in the next couple of years. I currently live with three close friends, and it’s a very wonderful dynamic. My boyfriend lives alone and is excited to move in whenever I’m ready. I would say the three biggest hesitations I have for moving in are 1) guilt about telling my friends I’m moving out 2) worrying we will become less close if we’re not living together and that I won’t maintain the friendships as well and 3) that it will be isolating living with just one other person vs 3 (like if he goes on a trip to visit family for a few weeks, and I’m at the apartment alone). In other ways, I feel like it’s time and I’m really excited to start building a life with him. It also feels like a chance to have more independence and control over my living environment, and to get to start investing more in our relationship. But I’m not sure how to make the jump or decide when. Does anyone have any advice or insight?

    1. This sounds like an ideal relationship: roommates to keep my costs down and further the friendship and a BF with his own place. But you’ve been together for 3 years. If you’re not ready to get engaged now, I’d just keep the status quo up and not move in. If you’re worried about drifting, definitely DON’T move in.

      Also: who goes to visit their family for a few weeks? Usually visits are shorter and eventually you go together (have you ever been?).

      1. Lots of people visit family for a few weeks? I know several people whose family live far away (like out of the country or across the country), and they will go on extended visits.

        1. I think it ONLY makes sense with a relative halfway around the world and every few years or a grave / acute illness or injury. Not a whole lot of jobs outside of teaching let you take off consecutive weeks.

          In which case: OP: how do you figure in with this? Especially if you were to be part of the family. And if visiting takes weeks, do they come and stay in what would be “your” apartment? What about your family? Does he come with you to visit?

          1. Lots of jobs will let you work remotely while visiting family even if you can’t take multiple consecutive weeks of vacation. Even pre-pandemic when I was supposed to be in the office on a consistent basis, I was allowed to work fully remotely for two weeks at a time to visit my family across the country. And of course many more people have remote work arrangements now.

          2. Yes, and that is a lot of vacation / time away in the “his family” bucket. If you want to sign onto this and still be able to visit your people AND take vacations as a couple, this is a big sticking point that I’d want to go in with very open eyes.

          3. You seem to have a very entrenched worldview without considering that others’ circumstances are different from your own, which can be a detriment in a partnership. (Not an opinion on OP’s situation, just trying to validate that the boyfriend isn’t weird for visiting family for an extended period)

          4. Wait until you have kids and they are school aged and then the weeks-long trips need to be just in the summer.

          5. The majority of people I know pull kids out of school for visits to family with no hesitation. We don’t (except for religious holidays and major life events like weddings and funerals) but it is super common, especially in elementary school.

    2. sorry this is coming out strong but- at 27, having been together for 3 years, it should not take another couple of years to get engaged. Either you know or you don’t, and based on your hesitancy about all the downsides of moving in together, you sound like you’re trying to convince yourself.

      also, visit family for a few weeks? do they live abroad? have you discussed long term how that family dynamic will work?

      1. Agreed. It sounds like you’re not ready, and that’s fine, but you need to be open with your boyfriend about it.

        1. This. It sounds like you’re not ready to move in with any bf, not just him. Also, friendship do change! You can drift from friends due to life circumstances and this is normal. It also means you have to put in more effort to spend time with them when you eventually no longer live together.

    3. I think you’re asking the wrong questions here.

      First and most basic: after three years of real, adult dating, why not get engaged relatively soon? Waiting for the sake of waiting is foolish. Either begin the business of spending the rest of your lives together or go and find people better for you.

      I’m 43, and let me tell you: 20 to 25 felt like it took decades, 25 to 30 went fast, and I feel like 32 was maybe five years ago.

      Do you expect your roommate or SO to provide a lot of social entertainment for you? Are you very extroverted or do you not have a lot of interaction outside of your roomies? No judge, but it’s good to know going in what your expectations are and what his expectations are.

      If you are hesitant about living together, and mostly want more “independence” and to not live with three women, why are you still with this guy?

        1. Not in all cases. My BIL and his gf have been dating for 4 years and are both about to turn 27 in the next few weeks. They moved in together in September but she is in grad school being supported by her parents and doesn’t like the idea of being supported by her parents when married so they are waiting into she is closer to being done

          1. I’m the Anon at 2:16 pm. I specified “three years of real, adult dating.” Someone being supported by parents might not count in that; however, I will die on the hill that you either know within three years or you aren’t the right people for each other.

            Also… I am definitely “over” this business of trotting out exceptions to pretend like a sensible guideline/life rule is arbitrary. Yes, we all understand that some of the eight billion people in the world will not fit into every paradigm; that doesn’t mean that we don’t have thoughtful and meaningful ways of looking at the world around us. It’s just immature to be like “aksually, my cousin’s roommate’s best friend’s third grade teacher had this other thing going on and….”

        2. This seems like a weird blanket generalization. I would say it’s unusual (but not necessarily bad!) to date for 3 years without engagement if you meet in your 30s or beyond, but mid-20s is still pretty young. My husband and I got engaged after dating for two years at 26 and everyone acted like we were moving super fast! The majority of people that age are still in grad school or in very entry level jobs not making much money – it’s sort of a pre-adulthood phase between college and real adulthood. I know plenty of people who wanted to wait on engagement until they finished grad school or just didn’t see much need to get married until they were ready for kids. Heck, my best friend is 39 and only just now marrying her long term partner but they’ve been very happy together for more than a decade, and my SIL got married at 31 to a guy she’d been dating since she was 19.

          I agree that in your late 20s, after three years together, you should be on the same page about where it’s heading and what the timeline is for engagement if you want to do that. But it seemed arbitrary to say three years is too long to date without an engagement.

          1. I agree with this. That three years statement is such an odd hill to die on. There is no set timeline and your timeline doesn’t have to look like anyone else’s.

    4. If you’re 27 and have been together for 3 years it seems like it’s time, unless you have a hard and fast rule like not moving in before engagement or marriage.

      I moved in with a college BF when I graduated (he was younger and still in college) and that ended and I moved out on my own which was kind of tough financially because I was in law school, but emotionally it was great and I loved living alone. Then I moved in with my now-husband after two months of in person dating and nine months of long distance (we met during my 2L summer and I moved to be with him after I graduated). That was more than 20 years ago. I know people say “they won’t want to buy the cow if they get the milk for free” (ugh I hate that phrase) but both those guys really wanted to marry me after living together for a bit…

    5. Gently, it seems like if you’re not super eager to move in with him or get engaged to him, you probably aren’t that into him.

    6. I agree with the other posters that this is striking me as odd. After 3 years with your boyfriend at age 27, you should already emphatically know whether or not you want to marry him. The fact that you’re uncomfortable with the idea of leaving your roommates tells me that you don’t love this man enough to marry him. You should be thinking about whether or not to breakup, not whether to move in together.

      I don’t want to be all “walking uphill in the snow both ways” about this, but 20 years ago when I was your age, I had already graduated from college, served in two different wars, bought a house, adopted two dogs, and gotten married. Out of the nest with you now. It’s time to launch and begin life.

    7. You can’t be married to this guy while living with your friends so you need to decide when you’re ready to build a life together. If you’ve been together three years then that time should be now. Your reasons why you’re scared to move in together are sort of concerning. People switch living situations all the time- why are you nervous about informing your friends you’re moving? Why would your fiance or husband unilaterally decide to go on a multi week trip without you? It sounds like you’re not ready to make him a priority, or you’re hesitant to become fully intertwined with him. Are most of your friends single or in casual relationships? Is there another reason you’re reluctant to enter a new life phase? Frankly if you’re 27 how much longer are you willing to invest in this guy before deciding you’re ready to get married? And how much longer is he willing to invest in you?

    8. This will be unpopular, but when you are married.

      Separately, if after three years of dating you aren’t really excited about the idea of living with and building a household with this man, then you don’t really want to marry him.

      1. Yep, when you’re married, and it sounds like you don’t want to be married (would rather live with your friends than him).

      2. My mom always made the same point, mostly using an extremely offensive dairy analogy. While I relayed this as a funny grandma story to my teenage daughter, I’ve seen too many women friends live with some guy for ages and ages, do all the housework and social planning, then get kicked to the curb when said guy has wrung every ounce of goodwill out of the relationship. I’m a slight hypocrite in that I moved in with my now-spouse after we got engaged but before we were married, but we live in a tight real estate market.

        If you’ve been together for a few years and marriage isn’t part of the conversation, moving in together isn’t going to make the marriage issue any smaller or easier for your two. And depending where you are, you may not have a lot of rights if he becomes injured or ill or dies.

    9. You say you are worried about growing apart from your friends if you don’t live with them, is there not the same risk of growing apart from your boyfriend by not living with him? Which is more important to you?

    10. honestly if you aren’t excited about moving in now, it may be time to break up! assuming you want the path of living together & getting married, you aren’t going to live with friends forever. And I think if you were really excited about him, you’d be excited to move in! I was in a similar relationship at similar ages (though we did live together) and it went on way too long because it was comfortable but he wasn’t the one.

    11. I think you and the BF need to be talking about getting engaged (or not), not moving in. I was dating a guy at 23 and moved in with him after about a year. After ~18 months (6 months living together) we were engaged. We were kinda young so we didn’t rush the wedding, and got married when I was 25.5, not quite 3 years after we met.

      I moved in with him when there was a natural shuffling of housing- his one year lease was up, one of my roommates was driving me bonkers and we spent a ton of time together anyway so sharing an apt made sense.

      It sounds to me like you don’t want to break up with your friends.

    12. Your roommate situation will not last this way forever, so I wouldn’t be making large life decisions based on it. Your roommates will eventually want to move on or live with their partners. There’s no guarantee that your current living situation is going to last. Since those are your only qualms and not any issues with your boyfriend, I’d go ahead and move in with him now.

    13. Maybe I’m just a loner, but I’m not understanding this weird attachment to your 3 friends. You’re a grown woman. You can’t live with them forever.

      1. I second this. This is something I’d expect from the 18-22 tops crowd. Not a 27 year old in a committed relationship.

        1. I think it’s a stage of life thing. If all your friends are single and living a friend-centric life it can be hard to be the first one to pull away and move in with an SO. This stage of life is more common in college and early 20s but in some circles extends to late 20s too.

        1. Nothing may be wrong with that. It wasn’t clear from reading the post, but it made me wonder whether OP has ever lived on her own. She didn’t seem to think much of the privacy and not having to compromise that comes with having your own place(or from having the place to yourself bc spouse is on a business trip). Maybe these roommates are a magic sisterhood where nobody ever forgets their laundry in the washer.

    14. Wait until you’re engaged. You’d clearly be giving up a lot moving in with him. Make sure it’s a committed relationship before doing that.

      1. I agree. Don’t sacrifice your living situation if you’re not even sure you’ll be with him long term. You don’t need to live together to know if it’ll work out prior to getting engaged.

      2. +1

        Also, run your own race. Just because some on this board were married and had made all their important life decisions by 27 doesnt mean you’re behind schedule. Take some time to think about what you really want.

    15. This isn’t something anyone can answer for you because what’s right for you may or may not be right for someone else.

      I started dating DH at 23, moved in at 25 after a chat that we were in agreement that it was headed to marriage, got engaged 6 months later and married at 27. He’s a couple years old so he was 26/28/31 at those stages. But two of my BFFs have never married and live with their partners. One has a kid with her partner and one is childless by choice. DH’s brother didn’t marry and they have a house and 3 kids together. None of this is better or worse, it’s just what each couple wanted.

      After 3 years together it’s not about the particular living arrangements at this exact moment, it’s about where this is going. Do you want to marry him? In a year, 3 years, 5 years or 10 years? Do you want to have kids? Does he? Where do you see yourselves living next year and in 5 years etc? Of course the best laid plans don’t always work out. I wouldn’t have expected to have three kids including one with medical issues instead of the planned two kids, but life happens. It’s still valuable to have those discussions about where each of you see this going before moving in together. What does that step mean to each of you and where do you go from there?

    16. I’m less concerned about not wanting to get engaged for another few years – it’s 2024 for crying out loud. But I am curious why 3 roommates is more attractive living situation over living with your proclaimed forever-partner. That jumped off the screen at me.

      You’re not living with “just one other person” – you’re living with YOUR person. And, yes, you will be come less close with your 3 girlfriends but you’ll be come SO MUCH MORE close with your partner (why isn’t that a giant pro here?).

      I hate to jump in the chorus here, but if it’s not a “hell yes,” then is it not a “hell no”?

      As an aside, you haven’t replied to anyone yet from what I can see so I’m wondering if you’re internalizing some of these comments; I’m sure it’s hard to read. Hugs to you.

    17. OP here. I don’t think I represented the situation well. My boyfriend and I are 100% sure about marrying each other, and I’m completely in love with him. He’s literally a dream-come-true person for me, and I feel like I won the lottery finding him. We spend 4-5 days a week together currently, and I love spending time with him. It’s a lot of going back and forth, which would make it a lot easier to live together versus spend most of the week together but having separate places. But I do like the sense of having my own space to return to, and the slight sense of independence that that gives me, even if we spend most of our time together. I suppose part of it is that theoretically once we move in together we will never go back to not living together, so I’d have to say goodbye to the phase of life living with my best friends and being a bit carefree. I also have a vague sense that it could add stress or seriousness to a relationship to live together and maintain a household, whereas right now I feel like it’s sweet, loving, and fun with very little conflict. I am sure I want to move in with him and get married at some point, but making the leap does feel a bit scary and entering a new chapter that I’ve never experienced before.

      Also, for clarification, I live with my three best friends and we have very close relationships. I was a bit surprised by the “What’s wrong with you for wanting to live with three women” comments. They’re my best friends and I know I’ll never live with them again once I move out. There isn’t any conflict or tension around chores etc the way some roommates might have, and it’s mostly like a permanent slumber party with lots of laughter and emotional support. I know it will feel like a loss no matter what to permanently leave this chapter of life, and I don’t think that reflects negatively on the amount I love my boyfriend.

      It is helpful to know how many people would consider me a bit of a freak or like I don’t sufficiently love my partner for liking living with my friends – It will probably feel less like a betrayal when I do decide to move out haha. And yes, the three roommates are single and dating, so I will be the first one to move out when I do.

      1. You should move out and get your own place, with the idea that the BF moves in when you are ready.

        1. That was not my takeaway at all. OP, you clearly have won some kind of friendship jackpot and it sounds like you current living situation is more free of drama and little annoyances that most roommate arrangements. I now better understand your hesitation to leave that.

          1. +1 that was pretty much the exact opposite of my thoughts after reading this. This living situation sounds amazing!

      2. Fwiw, I was surprised by the tone of the comments because this board skews towards people who married and had kids comparatively late. I know this varies a lot based on where you live and who you hang out with and in my rural Midwest hometown people most get married around 22-23 and have three kids by 27, but in my college/grad school circles, 27 was still seen as SO young. I got married at 27 and everyone around us acted like I was a child bride! The vast majority of my close friends didn’t get married until 30+ and outside of my hometown I know many more people who got married for the first time from age 35-40 than in their 20s.

        I personally think your living situation sounds like a dream (I’m jealous! I never had that kind of tight girl group after college) and I understand why it makes you sad to leave. It will end eventually though…you or someone else will move in with a partner or move away for a career opportunity. I think the most important thing here is your boyfriend’s feelings. Is he in no rush to move in together? Or would he really like for you to move out so you two can start your lives together? If you’re committed to him, his feelings should take priority over your friends’ and it’s not kind to make him wait for you so you can hang out with your friends for another year or two. But if both he and you are in no hurry, then I don’t see any need to rush it.

      3. I’m baffled by all these comments here! (Then I remembered that this place is a bunch of overly conservative traditional women who are obsessed with marriage in weird ways!)

        OP, I moved in with my boyfriend at 32 and married at 34 and wouldn’t change the amazing time I had with my roommates and friends in my 20s and early 30s for the world. In my city, getting engaged before 30 is child bride territory. Truly. I can count on one hand the number of local friends who married before 30.

        To this board: for crying out loud, it’s perfectly fine for someone to not want to give up their amazing friend-living situation at age 27, and it’s also fine to not want to get married/engaged at 27, even when you’re positive you’ve found your person! Life is long! There is space for all of our amazing relationships! AND WOMEN SHOULD BE PRIORITIZING FEMALE FRIENDSHIPS BECAUSE MOST MEN WILL GO ON TO VOTE FOR LEGISLATORS WHO DON’T BELIEVE WOMEN’S LIVES SHOULD BE SAVED IF THEY UNDERGO A MEDICAL EMERGENCY WHILE PREGNANT! My god.

        1. We were reacting to a poster with a stated goal of marriage then go on to be wishy washy about the timeframe and whether she actually wants to change her life to live with the guy. I don’t see excessive pearl clutching here…

          OP- sounds like you have a great friend group, but someone has to be first to leave that stage. It’s ok to mourn the end of a life stage a bit but your actions need to match up with your priorities. If your bf was going to be awful to live with (a manchild who doesn’t maintain his home without prodding) you’d know that by now, right?

        2. Obsessed with marriage (mostly the wedding) and then hating their husbands. Such fun!

          I say this as a married person but honestly, it gets really old around here sometimes. People walk different paths in life. There is no one size fits all.

      4. Your situation sounds wonderful for you. It’s not like you don’t practically live with boyfriend already if you’re spending 4-5 days of the week together. Having your own space to retreat to sounds amazing, and your friends sound great too.

        There are a lot of people here projecting their own experiences onto yours. In fact, more projection that your local multiplex. Run your own race. If you and boyfriend, and roommates, are all happy, I wouldn’t be in a hurry to change the status quo either.

        1. This was my reaction. It won’t last forever, but why not enjoy it while it lasts? You don’t have to be the first to leave. Unless BF is impatient because he’s sad about living alone? But if your plan is to get married, you’ll move in together eventually. In some ways living together is the most overrated part of marriage to me; there are reasons women fantasize about or actually build their she-sheds and ADUs!

  5. This looks like polyester. 20 years ago this would have looked so cheap. Our standards on materials for clothing have fallen so far. We dress ourselves in head to toe plastic.

    1. Preach. I cannot find a nice wool suit with lined pants anywhere at any price. I wish I still had the one I bought in 2004 that I finally purged in 2020 because it was out of style and I hadn’t worn it in nearly a decade. It would be back in style now.

    3. Agree. I’ve been toying with the idea of buying a classic, designer blazer that costs nearly $1500 because it’s a wool/cashmere blend and if I wear it for 10 years (which seems possible) it costs only $150 a year. The quality of clothing has really gone down the tube in the last 20 years. Sigh.

      1. You can find lots of these kinds of things resale too, if you don’t want to spend that much money. (Or in my case, can’t spend that much money.)

      2. I hear you, but to be perfectly honest, I’ve never actually liked anything for a full ten year run. Five years maybe, that’s only for a really special item. Not for a daily/weekly wear item.

    4. I don’t get this suit choice, I thought Ted Baker went bust a couple of weeks ago? it was all over the news in the UK.

  6. I haven’t been to Europe in ages. If you are going to a bunch of countries (Germany, Switzerland, Austria), will one charger with a plug for “Europe” work in all countries? And will my kids’ Greenlight debit cards work there? I know my credit cards will. And do airtags work regardless of country? I’ve avoided them until now, but will put in luggage, maybe kids’ daypacks.

    Finally, any good BIG wheelie bags to recommend? My bag is a tiny AWAY bag, so I need to get a BIG check-able bag with wheels (have been using a duffel for car trips since COVID; do not want a big heavy duffel for this). Any good recommendations for something servicable and basic? Not like Rimowa but more like the great wheelie bags that they used to have at Costco.

    Finally, for European city tourist-wear, I assume that teens where white sneakers will all outfits everywhere (but what do you wear to a kids’ waltz lesson in Vienna if we add that on), maybe adults, too. But will Birks + socks + pants (my REI weekend casual vibe) look really out of place? Will Athleta Brooklyns?

    1. Plug shape – I think those 3 all use the same one but you need to google each country and see. Ex. UK is a different shape than western Europe.
      Airtags – they work on bluetooth not cell so no issues
      Bag – Travelpro’s 2-wheel styles are very durable for a reasonable price point
      Tourist wear- street sneakers are everywhere, but athleisure is not. Wear real pants.

      1. It sounds harsh but I agree with the outfit advice. Birkenstocks and socks aren’t a good combo even in the US. I manage to walk 15k steps wearing jeans in my own city. You don’t need gymwear to walk around.

        1. Yeah, I do a lot of walking in chinos. I own the Athleta Brooklyn pants but they’re not required for walking.

          I also agree on Birkenstocks with socks. Get some sneakers, OP.

    2. For continental Europe, the same adapter should work everywhere (UK/Ireland is different). There are slightly different shapes that are sometimes marketed as “southern Europe” or “northern Europe” but they all work everywhere on the continent.

    3. I think continental Europe uses the same plugs, but they are different in the UK. I have one of those multi-pronged things and it works fine, but it a bit bulky.
      Outfit: Birks + socks + athletic pants will definitely scream tourist in most European cities. That’s fine if it’s really what you want to wear, but jeans (or a cute skirt or linen pants if it’s really hot) + sneakers will be less conspicuous (fashion sneakers are everywhere in Europe). And I would pack a pair of cute, lightweight flats for dresser occasions, including waltz lessons (sounds fun!).

    4. I love that you’re asking whether Birks with socks will look out of place in Germany :)

      1. I can’t tell if you think it’s silly because no one in Germany wears that, or because many people do, but fwiw, the only person I know who wears socks with sandals is German! He has lived in the US for ~5 years now though.

      2. You see, I always suspected the Czechs as the ‘trendsetter’s of the Socks + Slippers.
        But it seems the general consensus is that Germans invented the heavenly combo and Czechs adapted it to Socks + Outdoor sandals (favored by the IT crowd and men 35+).
        And it will all be here, live, in a month or two :)

          1. Think generic thin white cotton ankle-length socks in Keen outdoor sandals. For best user experience, look this up: ponozky v sandalech.

    6. EU has unified the plugs, so if you are visiting any of the EU countries (you can look up the full list), one type of plug conversion is fine.

      Whether your cards will work is best checked with your bank/card issuer. I have cards issued in EU and had issues in the UK and France in some stores as they were using older type of terminals and my card was ‘too new’ for them. Luckily, I had two cards with me and one of them worked. Never had any issues in Germany, Switzerland, Austria. In general, both MasterCard and Visa debit cards are accepted without issues. Some countries, for example the Netherlands, don’t accept credit cards. Again – I would highly recommend checking with your card/bank issuing company.

      The airport in summer will be super crowded and the airport ground team will treat your luggage accordingly – they will not be gentle. Please, don’t spend your hard-earned money on a fancy suitcase. I have better luck with fabric suitcases. All my hardshell suitcases need replacement after 2-3 years. I got have a few (sturdy) fabric Samsonite suitcases during sale and they are indestructible (my oldest is 13y). Make sure you check your airline luggage dimension limits.

      As for outfits, oh boy, how to put it. The US crowd is not known for their fashion. Socks in sandals are usually a signature style of Eastern Europe. You will probably walk a lot in Europe and on a hard surface. You would be better off with comfortable, lightweight, breathable, cushioned sneakers or sandals (think Geox, Ecco, or similar), your feet will thank you in the evening. I would bring sneakers, nice pair of cushioned sandals and some low-heeled sandals (for your dancing lessons or nice dinner). In the clothing department, I would go for casual dressy cotton or linen pants, with a breathable vest and cotton/linen shirt or a long dress (with sleeves). For evening/dinner, a nicer dress. Bring a light linen jacket. And some waterproof lightweight packable jacket (depending on location). Sunglasses. And buy proper SPF creams while you are here, as the sun will be tough. To be fair, I wouldn’t worry much about whether your clothes will fit or not – we don’t care and we will judge you anyway at the same time. I would focus on being comfortable. And on being polite and not talk too loud. That is a much bigger offense in D/A/CH than fashion :)

      For Waltz lessons, if you are already wearing your midi/long dress with sleeves and your low-heel sandals, you’re fine.

      Enjoy your trip!

    7. I’m just going to say that they sell universal adapter plugs that have the adapters for UK, Europe, Asia, Australia etc. I’ve used mine for like 7 years if not longer.

  7. I’m in the beginning stages of planning a girls’ trip for my 40th next year in May. Can you suggest a city in the US that would be fun to visit with good mix of both relaxation (beach?) and activities (art, museums, shopping, etc), has good weather in May, and hopefully isn’t astronomically expensive? Bonus if we can get around by walking/public transit/Uber without having to rent a car.

      1. Yes. Folly is awesome if you are a beach person. And it is an easy and short drive to Charleston (commuter suburb).

      1. San Diego is great but isn’t reliably warm in May, especially in the evening.

    4. Charleston if you don’t mind renting a car for beach day
      Miami if you don’t mind the heat
      Chicago if you don’t mind just looking at water instead of being in it
      That “emerald coast” area of FL & AL if art and museums is likely wishful thinking and your group will really want to just hang out and chill poolside

    6. Chicago – beach is the lake. I am not a midwesterner but that’s what I’d do in your shoes.

      1. I’m biased because I live here, but Chicago is beautiful in May and has so much to do in the way of art, museums and theater, as well as great food and wine. It will be too chilly to swim in the lake in May, but you can definitely enjoy being on or near the water. We have some really great spas too.

        I love the restaurant scene in Charleston but imo there’s not really anything to do there besides eat. I feel like I got the gist on my first visit and have never really had any desire to go back, although I know many people love it.

      2. I’m from Chicago. If you plan to swim in Lake Michigan, that’s more mid June or later. Heck there is still frost at night some nights right now.

    7. Hi May 1985 birthday buddy! My husband and are doing a long weekend in Napa and. I think that would be good for a girls trip too. Charleston and Miami are too hot for me personally at that time of year, but I would go to celebrate a friends milestone.

    8. Hi there, I’m turning 40 next year too and planning the same kind of trip! It will still be too cold to sunbathe on the beach in Chicago in May. If your goal is relaxation I would center your trip around some lovely spas. Ojo Santa Fe spa is amazing. Sedona has an emphasis on wellness, gems and psychics if that is your thing. Savannah is an absolutely fantastic girls’ trip destination. Also, Mexico City and Montreal.

      1. I like the Mexico City and Montreal ideas! Although Montreal will be colder than Chicago in May.
        I don’t know how much your circle did bach parties, but Charleston, Savannah and Miami are hugely popular for those, and I feel like they’re kind of tired because everyone has been to them on girls trips before, so doing something different would be nice.

      2. If you enjoy soaking in hot springs, would tack on a recommendation for Ojo Caliente, the mother resort of Ojo Santa Fe. A couple of hours outside of town, so you could spend time in Santa Fe and a couple of nights at Ojo Caliente.

  8. What pants do you wear when it’s too hot for jeans and you want a step up from leggings/athletic shorts? Joggers?

    3. Linen or cotton twill. There are so many more options out there than just jeans or joggers.

    8. Wide leg linen pants (Quince does these well) or golf pants (stretch fabric, lighter than jeans, and breathe well).

  9. Just wanted to say thank you to everyone who posted on my comment earlier today and on my earlier comments over the last 2 month. I cannot tell you how much the support from you means to me. I have found it as important to me as my real life support system. I have been saving all your messages, and they are in my ‘I will get through this file’, I will keep updating. Xxx

    1. a bunch of strangers can’t do this for you – while you’re right it should be midi length, 4″ below my kneecap is the widest part of my calf, throwing off my proportions. I prefer just below where the calf muscle curves back in, for a longer line.

  11. I finally purchased a Mulberry Bayswater and it was delivered today. I was expecting to get it in a box, but it was delivered in a Mulberry shopping bag (bag was in a dust bag within the bag).

    For those of you who have purchased something from Mulberry recently, did you receive a bag or a box?

    1. Where are you located? I had a DeMellier bag delivered and I was surprised that the DHL box contained a black fancy shopping bag, a tissue paper wrapped box, and then a dust bag inside the box. It was a LOT of packaging for a bag imho. Mine was delivered from the UK to the US – maybe this was delivered from a local botique?
      Fwiw this is also the deal with Hermes – I frequently buy in store and ship to my home so I don’t have to lug bags around a city with me. They always ask if I want the orange store bag PLUS the box (I guess the store bags are a collectible?).

      1. I think all the boxes and bags are collectibles. When I was at Gucci in Florence a couple of years ago they gave me a collapsible box so I could easily fit it in my suitcase!

      2. People will literally buy the packaging on eBay so if you don’t want it yourself, make a few $!

      3. Yeah, that’s why I’m bummed I didn’t get a box. I’m on the West coast and from tracking it looks like it was shipped from NYC.

  12. Does anybody have any recommendations for an employment lawyer in the Boston area? My sister is experiencing discrimination since she had her children and believes she will be fired soon. Thank you!

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