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Thursday’s Workwear Report: The Signature Shirt

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Our daily workwear reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices.

I’ve been a big fan of this brand for years, so I was pretty psyched when the folks at The Shirt offered to send me something from their new collection. Before I found this brand a few years ago (thank you, Oprah!), I was sewing extra snaps into my button-down shirts to prevent that weird gapping that always seems to happen at the bust. These blouses have extra buttons sewn into the plackets that stop that from happening at all.

I already owned several of their classic cotton stretch button-downs, but this beautiful python print comes in a silky crepe de chine fabric that drapes beautifully and barely wrinkles. I have a long torso and particularly appreciated the fact that this was plenty long enough to be tucked into a pencil skirt or a pair of trousers.

In terms of sizing, I found it ran true to size and liked that I didn’t need to size up in order for it to button and stay closed.

The shirt is $98 full price at The-Shirt.com but is now on sale for $78, and it comes in sizes XS–XXL. If you like the print, it's also available in a shirtdress for $102, marked down from $128. (Right now, you can get 20% off sitewide!) The Signature Shirt 

Note from Kat: We rarely accept products for review, but we did in this case because we've been great admirers of The Shirt for more than a decade now!

This post contains affiliate links and Corporette® may earn commissions for purchases made through links in this post. For more details see here. Thank you so much for your support!

Seen a great piece you’d like to recommend? Please e-mail tps@corporette.com.

Sales of note for 4/18/25:

  • Nordstrom – New spring markdowns, savings of up to 50%!
  • Ann Taylor – 40% off + extra 15% off your entire purchase
  • Banana Republic Factory – 50%-70% off everything + extra 20% off
  • Boden – 10% off new womenswear
  • The Fold – 25% off selected lines
  • Eloquii – extra 40% off all sale
  • Everlane – Spring sale, up to 70% off
  • J.Crew – Spring Event: 40% off sitewide + extra 40% off all sale
  • J.Crew Factory – 40%-70% off everything + extra 20% off orders over $125
  • Kule – Lots of sweaters up to 50% off
  • M.M.LaFleur – Earth Day Sale, take 25% off eco-conscious fabrics. Try code CORPORETTE15 for 15% off
  • Rothy's – Final few – Up to 50% off last chance styles; new favorites added
  • Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
  • Talbots – 40% off + extra 15% off all markdowns

Sales of note for 4/18/25:

  • Nordstrom – New spring markdowns, savings of up to 50%!
  • Ann Taylor – 40% off + extra 15% off your entire purchase
  • Banana Republic Factory – 50%-70% off everything + extra 20% off
  • Boden – 10% off new womenswear
  • The Fold – 25% off selected lines
  • Eloquii – extra 40% off all sale
  • Everlane – Spring sale, up to 70% off
  • J.Crew – Spring Event: 40% off sitewide + extra 40% off all sale
  • J.Crew Factory – 40%-70% off everything + extra 20% off orders over $125
  • Kule – Lots of sweaters up to 50% off
  • M.M.LaFleur – Earth Day Sale, take 25% off eco-conscious fabrics. Try code CORPORETTE15 for 15% off
  • Rothy's – Final few – Up to 50% off last chance styles; new favorites added
  • Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
  • Talbots – 40% off + extra 15% off all markdowns

And some of our latest threadjacks here at Corporette (reader questions and commentary) — see more here!

Some of our latest threadjacks include:

329 Comments

  1. I am experiencing some…terrible flatulence…of late and I’ve come up with the following foods as possible culprits. Which to eliminate first? Have you experienced similar symptoms from any of these? I have terrible digestion and I just don’t know what to eat anymore.

    ground turkey
    chia seeds (2 tsp)
    Dr. Praeger’s Super Greens veggie burgers…now with PEA PROTEIN
    PB Fit

    1. Of those 4 I can only speak to #1 and #3, and one Dr. Praeger’s burger was enough to warn me off of them. Plain Greek yogurt does a perfectly effective job with digestion (for me anyway) without all the discomfort.

      1. Any kind of dairy can be an issue with people who are lactos intolerant. Veggies also cause gas, and veggie burgers can be very gassy. Finally, seeds are good, in that they go through you and keep things moving, but they too can be gassy. Grandma Trudy eats a bland diet b/c of her IBS, so you may want to talk to your doctor to see what is causing your gassyness. If your boyfreind is doing stuff back there, tell him to stop b/c that is not natural or good for you.

    2. The middle two would be problematic for me! Also, I don’t have major advice but am dealing with a multiple of ongoing gut issues that a colonoscopy, endoscopy, and pill cam have not been able to solve. The gastro doctor shrugged and essentially said “Maybe it’s IBS. Try Metamucil and probiotics.” I just wanted to write that I can relate and feel your pain! I’ve joked with my fiance about ordering a pair of fart-filtering underwear. I am tempted!

      1. I’ve gotten the same advice. Probiotic pills always broke me out in the worst acne, and even my PCP recommended that I not take them (she said that I would break out everywhere) even after gastro suggested it. Sad that we don’t have more help.

        I’m with you on the underwear!

        I thought pea protein was supposed to be easy to digest…Maybe that is just false marketing.

    3. I would get rid of the veggie burger if only because when we gave my cat a new food containing pea protein, she started throwing up a lot.

    4. I had a really bad experience with Trader Joe’s meatless burgers with pea protein.

    5. are you eating gluten? for me, flatulence was the first sign of my intolerance

    6. I’d recommend doing an elimination diet. There’s a book called Clean by Dr. Junger that has a recipe for an elimination diet. I’m doing this off the top of my head but I think you had a smoothie for breakfast, a dinner sized meal at lunch (from the approved list) and then a soup at dinner. I swapped it when I did it because I was working in the office at the time and wanted to eat dinner with my husband. The South Beach Diet also has an elimination aspect to it just in how it is crafted. I’m not saying to do these diets to lose weight, but to identify your triggers.

      Unfortunately, one can be allergic/intolerant to almost anything so even something on the “safe” list could cause you problems. If it is a true intolerance it can take a few weeks to fully get your body healed and see improvement. If I have gluten for example, I’ll have issues for 2 weeks.

      Did you start any new meds? When I started Zoloft, I found I got really bad stinky gas when I had sugar. It has mostly gone away since I weaned off the Zoloft and onto Welbutrin instead.

      I’m sure if you google elimination diet you will find lots of options. That’s the only way I finally figured out my avocado allergy. I had been to the hospital multiple times for severe “food poisoning.” I didn’t realize until I did the elimination diet that the common denominator in all of those hospital trips was avocado within 24 hours. As part of my elimination diet, I had avocado in a smoothie the second week or so and promptly threw up after just a few sips. The light bulb finally went off.

      1. Was going to say take guidance from elimination diets and eliminate all 4 for a period of a couple of weeks and slowly reintroduce one at a time (spread out over several days) to see which one it is.

      1. Yes. Eating straight beans, raw green peppers, and cucumbers will never result in gas.

      1. Yes, the low FODMAP diet solved a lot of issues for me with bloating and general discomfort. It’s an elimination diet so some foods might be the culprits and others will be fine for you. Cauliflower and asparagus are out of the question for me but other foods on the lists cause no symptoms.

        1. For me, lactose, fructan (in wheat but I can eat REAL sourdough-no problem), onions, garlic and beans (except for small amounts or CANNED chickpeas and lentils) as well as fruits with more fructose than glucose are all triggers. If you think you may want to try the low-FODMAP diet, you absolutely have to buy the MONASH University app, which tells you which foods are low, medium and high in FODMAPS. I can tolerate sorbitol no problem but that’s another trigger for many folks.

          1. Ha, I love the Monash app! I especially appreciate that it tells you that a small portion of something is a green light, but a larger portion is a red — and gives the appropriate portion size!

    9. Not on your list, but low-fat yogurt that’s artificially sweetened is the culprit for me. Holy moly does my body hate that stuff!

      1. I try to stick with the 365 brand almond yogurt (I get bad cystic acne from dairy). Cashewgurt tends to bring on the bad gas, as does that other plant based one in WF. I think the coconut is okay (like Coyo), but I’m not sure how the fat affects my hormones. I’ve read a lot about this and I’m just not sure yet.

        In a pinch, I get the Silk Unsweetened Almond one because WF is 20 minutes away and I can’t always get there. I think (?) I’m okay with that one, but I’m not sure I’m happy with the ingredients.

        I do like the gingered carrots from WF as well to switch things up. I know we’re supposed to rotate these types of things. The green sauerkraut was giving me gas, unfortunately. Beets are a high FODMAP, so can’t have that. The purple cabbage tends to have onions or beets mixed in, etc…

    10. Look at the nutrition info for the last three and see if any of them have a lot of soluble fiber. I can handle insoluble fiber just fine but soluble fiber in any large amount leads to the issue you are describing.

  2. Nice! But I would never wear it – I have stopped buying button front shirts because they just sit in my closet unworn.

    Can anyone help me with ideas for our family pictures this year? I want to wear a dress since I’ve worn pants for the past 2 years. Any inspiration welcome! I also need help on styling – tights and boots? and if so what kind of boots? Pics will be in late October when hopefully it will be colder in New England.

    1. The thought of a dress and tights just gave me ‘what world are we in again’ vibes, ha. If you want to go for that I’d do maybe all black – I think Kate Middleton’s pregnancy look from NY with the black turtleneck dress, necklace for interest, black tights and boots is a classic. Husband could wear a gray sweater, kids in a mix of patterns/solids that include gray/black aspects for balance.

      Or what about using outerwear for interest, but keeping the rest of your outfits consistent with 2020 home life? Like – that Brooks Bros cape recommended yesterday, skinny jeans and flats? Sweater blazer with leggings and boots?

      1. I like the idea of outerwear being the focus, a bright wool coat for you, a peacoat for your husband, cute coats or heavy sweaters with jeans for the kids. Then you can use it again.

      2. Love Kate Middleton + outerwear inspiration for this – a black sweater dress with a jewel covered jacket would be awesome.

    2. I have a hard time envisioning 2020 with any sort of pulled-together look. It’s like I’ve forgotten what that is. For us, it would be me in my Moira Rose garb (black with a dash of white), but poorly executed and sadly downmarket (like some of the black items may have faded and look sorry). Husband in stretchy pants. Kids in last year’s clothes because we never went back-to-school shopping. They grew up and not out, so I hope cropped bottoms are in. Cropped tops certainly are.

      1. Lol, right!?!?! I was surprised by the question because I assumed OP wants the pic for their holiday card, but then realized the OP probably just wants a nice family picture for this year in their life, esp. since kids grow so fast.

        It then dawned on me that there may be one perk to 2020–many fewer obnoxious “this is what my family did this year” holiday cards/newsletters when December rolls around. We know anyone with a really long or “impressive” list for 2020 is lying, ha ha ha!

    3. What about a navy theme. If the pics are outside, I’m assuming there will be fall leaves in NE. I find navy a bit cozier with the fall leaf colours.Could be a jean shirtdress, navy sweater dress, Jean skirt. Depends on your colouring and that of your family too.

    4. I love jewel tones for fall – maybe find evergreen, burgundy, or deep purple? I can’t do dark orange or yellow but if you don’t like navy I bet you can find a warmer tone “fall” color! I don’t know which boot style will technically be “in” this year with so many of us “out” but I’d say wear something that makes you comfortable as you might be walking to get impromptu shots. Tall boots are classic but not “on trend” as far as I see it.

      I’m also seeing a lot of long cardigans, so you could do a Skirt/top combo or dress with a long Cardi.

      2. I am struggling with these daily comments about the mom’s site. Are you just really jazzed about moms or do you hate moms, or what? What are you communicating?

        1. Yes, what’s happening? Is it a paid promotion for the mom’s page or why can you be bothered to do this?

      3. This comment is an exception I think because there really was just a discussion about this on the mom’s page with some great advice! If that person doesn’t read here, DB would be missing out by not tracking her down over there.

          1. Anon at 10:15 was trying to be helpful. I’m the anon who usually directs questions directly about children’s issues to the Moms page, because those discussions make more sense there. I didn’t do that here, because OP is asking about clothes for photos, not child rearing advice–that DOES belong on this page. Sorry to Anon at 10:15–clearly I’ve struck a nerve with several commenters.

  3. Does anyone have any experience with temporary gazebos/screened-in porches? A permanent structure is cost prohibitive but we live in the upper Midwest so we’re worried about strong winds and winter storage.

    1. We live in the Chicago area. Same scenario where a permanent structure is too expensive (would include zoning requests), but we really need the extra space of a three season room. In the 10 years we’ve lived in this house, we’ve gone through 4 metal gazebos. All have been taken down by strong storms including a few straight-line wind events. We’ve had the best luck with an Aldi pergola from a few years ago. We can scrunch the shade on the side when storms and rains are coming, and take the shade down for the winter, and I think that’s what has helped it last. It’s not a true three season gazebo, but it adjusts to block sun so it works for our space.

    2. I bought a Coleman pop-up screen house and have been happy with it. We do take it down when high wind or lots of rain is forecasted.

    3. Check with the city as to what permits you need–even if this is a temporary use. If you’re adding impervious surface in large amounts, you may need to get some stormwater analysis done or need a temporary use permit, etc. Better to know now than to stare down code enforcement penalties, which can add up based on each day of violation…

    4. I do a lot of car camping and have gone through plenty of screen houses and cheap canopies. But we recently purchased a Clam and it is amazing. It is incredibly easy to put up and take down; it’s very roomy; and it’s solid. Be sure to watch videos of setting it up so you can get a real sense of how wonderful it is. It is still very long (but not too thick) when collapsed so that might be a challenge for storage.

  4. Are one-way interviews the new thing? I applied to a job at a large company and received an offer to “interview” by recording my answers to auto-generated questions. Is this the norm now at large companies? I was really turned off by it.

    1. I’ve done a 3 of these and they’re really challenging. For large companies, it’s used as the screening interview. All 3 have been at different types of orgs (1 bank, 1 federal agency, 1 international fashion company) and I can admit these are my weakness. Best of luck for you…and test your outfit/makeup/lighting before hand!

      1. Oh I was so turned off I withdrew my candidacy. It was only a phone call in which I would record my answers. I’m really not interested in working for a company that is so disinterested in candidates that it can’t even bother to use a real human to talk to them.

    3. I had to do one for an interview with the state and I found it really offputting. Interviews are supposed to be a two-way street. I ultimately turn down the job because I had another offer and did not end up sharing any feedback because I didn’t want to burn the bridge, but it was really irritating. The tech to record the interview was also super glitchy and it took three hours.

    4. I’m in the process of hiring for my large company and the process is like this:
      1. Screen Resumes
      2. Selected candidates based on resume get asked to record answers to 3-5 (technical) questions
      3. Screen recordings
      4. Selected candidates base on recording get invited to 2 hour interview. Right now these are video interviews. Two interviewers, first hour; two different interviewers second hour.

      I know that it can be uncomfortable to record the screening questions, but I’m pretty easy going about it. If the candidate has an idea of what the question is, it shows. It means that we aren’t wasting 2 hours of your time if you don’t have the right mix we’re looking for. I think that this is more & more common, especially with larger companies. Good luck with the job search!

      1. You’re forgetting the fact that you are denying the applicant the ability to interview YOU and to see if they want to proceed in the process. If you have any power at all in changing how you do hiring, please reconsider. This also seems like a discrimination landmine. Now employers can cut out applicants of a certain race or sex without ever giving verbal clues to the applicant to know that they were discriminated against.

        1. We aren’t denying the applicant a chance to interview us. During the in-person (currently video) interview, we give ample opportunity for two way dialogue on the culture, job responsibilities, advancement opportunities… whatever questions the candidate wants to bring up. The recorded screening questions are just an intermediate step, which is helpful when looking for with specific technical skills.

          I understand what you are saying about the potential for discrimination, however. All I can say that we have a ton of training on interviewing, biases, inclusion, diversity, etc and that the company takes these things very seriously. I am actually specifically looking for diversity candidates and wish more would apply…

          1. Yeah, I understand that you are giving an applicant the chance to interview you later in the process, but that is a significant time commitment. In a lot of the phone interviews I’ve had, I have learned something about the company that made me not want to proceed further because it wasn’t a good fit. That saved me from taking time off from my current job (<— another barrier that is harder for low-SES people) and wasting everybody’s time with a more in-depth in person interview.

      3. I work with a lot of engineers and let me just say, I am not surprised that an engineer is speaking up in favor of this. Any reason or excuse not to have to interact with live human beings is usually a win for the engineers I work with. If they could reduce humans down to a predictable algorithm that would be so much more comfortable for them. Regrettably, human beings don’t work that way. 90% of problems at my company are the result of engineers and scientists getting frustrated that the people they work with aren’t predictable like lab experiments, and their behavior can’t be modeled with 98% accuracy in a statistical program. Rather than accept reality, these folks continue to try to create systems so people have to behave like robots to succeed. It’s never going to work, but awareness of that seems lacking.

        As an HR person, this whole “recorded interview” concept makes my skin crawl. Interviewing should absolutely be a back-and-forth exchange. I cannot tell you how many interviews I’ve done where the candidate seemed like a really great fit, had all the right answers to questions, and then when we got to the section of the interview where they asked questions of me, it emerged that they wanted or needed something different than what we were able to offer, or had a very different understanding of what they’d be doing in the job than what existed in reality. That only emerges if the INTERVIEWEE can ask questions! It’s fundamentally disrespectful to communicate to a candidate that whatever questions they have about the position, the company, etc. don’t matter. Fit matters to both the candidate and the company. Recorded interviews make it seem like an interview is an audition for American Idol, or something.

        Also going to say, this does not save any time and cannot be any more efficient. Whether you are listening to a recording or listening to someone talking live, the amount of time spent listening is the same. The difference is, when speaking to someone live, there’s a possibility to figure out quickly that either A. the person is not a fit and the interview should conclude or B. the person is an excellent fit, there’s no need to go through more screening, and the conversation needs to advance to the next level. In fact, Out of Place Engineer, I would hazard a guess that if you did the first screening interview live? You would end up interviewing far fewer people in the 2-hour live interviews (which frankly seems like overkill to me anyway – I think your HR people need to do some continuing education on interview best-practices).

        1. I guess I only documented my part in the interview process. Step 0 is HR person contacts the candidate for a phone screen first, to answer any general questions, salary alignment, etc.

          I am not in HR and don’t pretend to be. I don’t know what the best practices are for interviewing. I am just sharing what the process is like at my company, to let the OP know that this process isn’t uncommon.

          I’m not sure I appreciate the generalization that engineers don’t like people and only want to look at data and expect people to be robots. Coming from an HR professional, I am surprised at the stereotyping. Perhaps I am not the kind of engineer that your are used to working with, but I am enjoying the interviewing process, getting to know the candidates, and building the strongest team I can (with both technical knowledge and soft skill required for working in an often confrontational environment.)

        2. That’s … kind of a sign of a bad engineer. No work is done in isolation, and asking for interviews to be done in isolation is a sign that this company doesn’t know how to manage engineers or engineering. For the record, I and most engineers I know would drop out of any hiring call that asked for this.

        3. I wonder if any of the people you are talking about are on the spectrum? My sense is that your description of what “humans” are like is actually a description of what “people who aren’t autistic” are like.

          1. I see no reason why job applicants should have to go through a sucky and somewhat dehumanizing interview process just because there may be some employees at a company who are autistic.

          2. I’m against video interviewing, but your accusations about people’s health are out of line. I wonder if any of the two of you are judgemental wretches who think you’re superior to everyone else when you’re really the embodiment of “man yells at cloud” and “you can’t teach an old dog new tricks”. You need etiquette training, empathy, and more. But congrats on your stellar video interviewing skills though.

          3. I’m not taking sides on the interview process, but I am questioning whether something that may work well for autistic people should be characterized as “dehumanizing” or unworkable for “live human beings.”

      4. Hard pass. Too many hoops to jump through before I actually get to find out if I even WANT to work there.

      5. Same, except we give people a quiz instead of asking them technical questions. It’s to weed out incompetent people, of which there are many!

        1. To clarify, it’s an online quiz. And while I think to some here it may seem rude to record answers to interview questions, which maybe it is, in our field many people prefer to record an answer rather than interact with a human! You can plan out your response and put your best foot forward, very low pressure.

          1. It was high pressure knowing you had 3 minutes to answer and if you messed up, only one chance to rerecord. If you make a minor verbal stumble in a real interview, there are usually a few seconds to catch your breath and compose yourself. Whereas on video, I assume these gaffes are magnified and can be replayed by the interviewer. These are only good if you are a VERY smooth talker, which we all know correlates perfectly with knowledge and ability (not)

    6. I refused to participate when an org sent me one of these interviews. I’m not going to deal with some poorly designed video platform so a company can save time. I think these platforms are indicative of how companies treat their employees and I’m not interested.

      1. see! right there the video interview helped us to weed out a candidate who would not be a good fit! sometimes jobs require things you don’t enjoy doing… I totally get they suck, but they are super helpful to us. I interviewed a woman today who I actually liked even more in the video interview, she just seemed more comfortable. Also, my company is great to its employees.

    7. I hate it. In my previous organization, we refused to use the recorded screen methodology for our hiring and used traditional phone screens instead. Our recruiting folks thought we were old fogeys.

      1. Or they hire someone who is paid a pitiful wage to do the work that they are claiming is AI

    9. I hope not, I was invited to do one a few years ago and I declined. It just seems so awkward to do! But I work in corporate talent acquisition, and there are definitely TA leaders who want to implement this technology because it would make their job so much easier, and I’m thinking yeah, but it’s at the expense of candidate experience, which should also be a priority.

      Recruiters are busy, I get that. I know this because at every company I’ve worked at, about half the recruiters on the team were always talking about how busy they were, and how they didn’t have time for this or that task. If recruiters and sourcers don’t “have time” for phone screens, I’d love to say the answer should be to grow the team so people aren’t stretched so thin. Unfortunately, these robo-screening tools probably cost less per year than a decent recruiter.

      I think someone also made the argument that they can save the recorded interview in their ATS in case they want to consider the candidate for future roles. That’s . . . that’s not better. I’m all for keeping notes on candidates in the ATS, it’s a scalability thing, but I don’t want to judge a candidate off the one-way interview they recorded years ago.

      1. That’s the thing though, how are they “so much easier?” How is developing and implementing a new technology and then having to sit through a recording faster than a 15-minute phone screen? I truly don’t get this trend.

    10. There is a hilarious Middleditch & Schwarz sketch about this kind of interview on Netflix right now. I think it’s the second episode. So funny! (And sounds so horrible in real life.)

    11. I did this once maybe five years ago as the first-round interview for a large organization. It was on video, which I absolutely hated. I think it’s so disrespectful to candidates for all of the reasons mentioned. If I came across it again, I’d nope right out of there.

    12. I’ve been sent this option as a VIDEO interview. As a black woman, this screams screen out disabled people, POC, and possibly anyone too poor to have a pretty background. If you have the option to do this, DON’T. You are opening up your company to insane law suits, especially since someone who has no clue what your position does or needs is doing the initial interview screening. You might as well request people submit a picture with their resume.

      1. Yep, I’m one of the critics above and mine was video as well. Not only was it super obnoxious to make me have to work from home so I could actually do an interview without my entire office watching me, I had to get dressed up, deal with a ton of technical glitches, and be worried the entire time that my appearance was going to be a turn-off since I am very average-looking and not that conventionally attractive.

      2. I’m confused about this concern. Doesn’t video interview take the place of in-person video where they would see if someone is a POC or disabled live? Or do you mean you prefer a phone interview first?

    13. I did one and hated it. I was so afraid I’d forget what I was doing and start yelling “REPRESENTATIVE” like I do every time I try to navigate a phone menu.

    14. You’ve gotten plenty of feedback but I just want to say, my company is doing this and it’s because we are so horribly understaffed we don’t have time to interview candidates and still do our weekly 60 hours of programming and 20 hours of project management they’re now demanding of us. In addition to being impersonal and not allowing you to interview the company, IMHO it speaks to a culture of “we’re running so slim we don’t even have time for interviews, much less water cooler chat.” Suffice it to say it’s not a culture I’m enjoying. My contract is up at the end of the year and I will not be renewing.

    15. The large multi-national I previously worked for did these, and were very proud of it as well. As employees, we all snickered at it as recruiting was already outsourced except for very senior roles, who didn’t have to do the one-way automated interviews anyways. So, it was actually some 3rd party recruiting person in India who reviews the videos, not someone who was employed by or even really familiar with the employer — just a checklist.

      My view is that people who have other options, or think they have other options, will pass on these interviews ultimately hurting the company’s ability to attract talent.

    17. From the employer perspective, this is a terrible, terrible practice. We already have enough problems with HR’s human screening process feeding us unqualified candidates because they don’t understand what we are looking for. I can’t imagine the garbage we’d get, and the great people we’d screen out, if we outsourced screening “interviews” to some contractor or, even worse, an AI algorithm.

      If the hiring organization can’t even devote the resources to interview candidates, it’s a sign that the organization is woefully understaffed and/or that you are being hired as a fungible, disposable commodity. I wouldn’t proceed with this organization, just as I wouldn’t proceed with an organization that used a personality test to screen candidates.

    18. I did this once and it was incredibly difficult. You only got two tries to answer the question. Without someone on the other end to gauge interest/facial cues, it was terrifically difficult to stay on target and not ramble. I also have a speech impediment that made things even more fun. Hard pass, if I’m ever offered that again. If you can’t even spare a live person to do a phone screen, then I’m not interested in working for your org.

  5. I’ve found one of the few advantages of lockdown life – kiddo is at nursery today and my husband and I are both WFH (he’s normally in the office the days we have childcare) so we went to a outdoor cafe for a quick lunch. Like a date without paying a babysitter. Very much recommend it.

    1. In Before Times my husband and I worked on the same university campus and did this regularly. It was lovely and is one of the things I miss most about our old lives.

      1. Yes, my husband works 5 minute walk away from me and we would have lunch every other week in the beforetimes or go for a quick walk. But both of our favourite lunch spots have gone bust!

    2. I love lunch dates with my husband! We eat lunch together at work often, but I miss the going out, or the meeting up we would do in college.

    3. I have found that focusing on the advantages of lockdown life makes everything more bearable. What else can you think of for your situation? A couple ideas from me – we’ve been able to save a lot more money while also increasing our charitable contributions, we also do the lunch date thing with takeout, we are connecting and getting along great because we don’t have the long commute to drain us, and we’ve been exercising more together.

      1. Definitely! I was on kid duty on Tuesday AM and I put him on the back of my bike and we made the rounds – playpark, farm shop to buy some groceries, snack in the woods. We then heard something in the field so we cycled out to the field and got to see two combine harvesters. He’s super obsessed with farm equipment and was so excited. Just being able to have a meandering morning guided by your whims is really lovely.

    4. Dad has found a 3BR apt. I have not yet looked at it. If we take it, I would love to be able to WFH with a husband who is also WFH. I would then be able to enjoy my 3BR 3BATH condo in SoHo with my husband, walk to Washington Square Park, and he would have his own toilet and I would use the en suite bathroom and toilet, and we could still have freinds over who would have to use the 3rd toilet. I would then not only have to walk to work once the office is open, and we could just sit and watch TV in the evening, or sit out on the terrace watching the sunset. YAY!!

  6. Any tips for remembering to ask questions when DH is upset about something? I find I either default to fixing the immediate problem or getting defensive, when really I should be asking questions about what’s going on.

    1. I find the most useful question to be ‘Do you want to vent or do you want to brainstorm? Either is fine, just let me know!’

    2. A variation on Cb’s suggestion: ‘Do you want to talk about it or do you want to be distracted?’

    3. Thank you! I think that’s really helpful. My biggest issue is that I just… forget that I’m supposed to do that! I don’t know how to remember in the moment.

      1. Does he have a tell when he is about to be upset? Slams the fridge door, a particular sigh, etc. (I once dated a guy that only ever called me by a classic name-shortening nickname when he was irritated.) Maybe you could associate that with the question you want to ask him.

    4. I ask MYSELF why is this bothering him so much and ask HIM questions to find out more details, such as what do you think the outcome of x is going to be and what would that mean for us, has this ever happened to you before, do you get the impression it is because of x reason, etc.

    5. are you me? I also default to finding a solution right away, and then being confused on why he’s still upset – we have a solution!

      With my DH, he really doesn’t like too many questions when he’s upset – especially solution-finding questions. :) Just listening and responding in an affirming way (“that makes sense.” “that’s really frustrating” “i’d be frustrated too”) moves us through it faster. I’m a firm believer in letting myself actually feel my feelings rather than rush through them, so I try and remember to allow him the space to feel them too rather than try and rush him through his.

      Not easy. :)

      1. Do venters know they’re just complaining or do they get offended at the very implication and complain about that too?

        1. I honestly just don’t see what is wrong with venting. Yeah, if you do it 24/7 it is annoying but isn’t a significant other or a good friend supposed to be there for a good vent session. I certainly will hear my friends/family through one. Sure it is annoying if there is an obvious solution they don’t want to take but sometimes people just need to get something off of their chest. Not everything is pathological and needs therapy. Sometimes it is just a normal human emotion that needs an outlet.

          1. My boyfriend and I do that too – vent or fix? And honestly I don’t think either of us are offended if the answer is vent, even if the vent:fix ratio is more often vent. Often in the process of venting, discussions of fixes arise.

        1. Speak for yourself – asking my husband to take initiative and be proactive (something he excels at at work) goes so much farther than asking him to shoulder mental and emotional labor.

    7. I just say “ugh! that sounds awful!” and repeat until he is ready to move on.

      Is that an option?

      1. There’s nothing I hate more than when my husband tunes me out and makes vaguely comforting noises. But I actually choose not to vent and am trying to have a conversation.

          1. You should hate that he wastes your time with rants that don’t warrant actual responses. I’m picturing you both walking around in a cloud of negativity like dual Pigpens, but you’re holding his pens and fawning while he waddles like Archie Bunker.

    8. You’ve gotten a lot of advice here on what to say (which is what you asked), but I want to offer what I do, because I’ve realized that the reason I start trying to fix the problem is that when DH complains, I immediately take on the emotions he’s putting out. I’m a problem-solver, so I jump right into trying to fix it so I don’t have to feel anxious/angry/stressed.

      When he starts venting now, I take a moment to push my hands on my own body – so if I’m sitting next to him, I’ll push down on the tops of my thighs with my palms. It’s a physical reminder that I’m me, and I’m not him. It sounds really woo-woo, I’ll admit. But it helps.

    9. So because this board attracts successful women, I think we have a disproportionate share of problem solvers here. The way I think of it, there are problem identifiers and problem solvers. Which one do you think a company wants to hire?

      My husband is a definite problem identifier and I’m a solver. We also say he is glass half empty, I’m glass half full. He actually does want the problem solving 99% of the time. So I actively participate in that. It’s what I’m good at.

      I admit I’m less patient with just listening to and sympathizing with complaining, especially if it’s the same complaint over and over, and he has taken no initiative to solve the problem. I feel like actually ignoring him has been good for our marriage. Literally ignoring him. No marriage counselor would recommend that but it works for us, 20 years in.

      He knows when he’s doing it, he knows when I’m ignoring him and why, and he moves on and changes the subject.

      1. Why don’t you use your words to tell him to stop instead of giving him the silent treatment?

  7. Am I overreacting? I received a message this week from an individual I’ll call A about one of my clients (I’m an attorney). The message slip had her name and the law firm she was calling from. I had not previously known A or the firm was involved in anything related to my client. I called A back and she answered. A said she was a relative of one of parties in a real estate deal that my client is also involved in and she is trying to help said relative with an issue that has arisen with the real estate deal. I spoke with A about the deal and the issue. Part of the issue relates to A’s concern about a legal case my client is involved in and her interpretation of the docket entries on the public docket sheet. A demanded a call back with an update within the next few days or her relative would be taking drastic action. I agreed. I assumed based upon all of this that I was discussing this matter with an attorney trying to help out a family member. I found out later the same day that A is a paralegal with this law firm. No attorney at the firm is representing this relative. I definitely assumed that A was an attorney. How would you handle this? Since she isn’t an attorney, I have no obligation to communicate with her on the seller’s behalf. I’m also bothered that she at least made it appear as though the law firm was involved in this when they are not in fact involved at all. Or am I just overreacting to all of this?

    1. I’d be tempted to tell her boss she was holding herself out as an attorney or representing a client on behalf of the law firm

      2. Exactly this. She is using her firm’s name when she is not an attorney and her firm is not representing the client.

      3. This is very much what I want to do, and that’s why I’m asking if I’m overreacting.

      4. You should absolutely do this. This is incredibly potentially damaging for the law firm. Honestly if she were my paralegal I’d fire her, that’s an egregious abuse of her position.

      5. You should absolutely do this. If I was A’s employer I’d want to know this. This indicates A cannot be trusted with the firm’s name and reputation. Honestly, this is terrible on A’s part.

    2. Just inform her that you have no obligation to communicate with her on the sellers behalf & don’t waste any more time on this

    3. Your obligation is to your client. Did your client give you permission to discuss the matter with their relative?

      1. This. And I would counsel a client against sharing with a non-attorney as any privilege is blown (as is their budget for the extra time it takes).

      2. That’s my concern with this situation. Didn’t you breach attorney client privilege by speaking about your client’s case with a non-party?

        1. No because if another party got representation she’d have a duty to discuss the case (not confidences) with that other attorney.

      3. It sounds like this isn’t her client’s relatives, it’s the relatives of one of the parties. OP, this is weird and I agree you have no obligation to talk to her. I don’t mean this a criticism, because I have done the same thing in the past, but now I always look up people who contact me out of the blue claiming to represent someone, mostly to make sure they actually work where they claim they work, and I also have had people who claim to represent others who are not even lawyers, just a friend or something.

        1. This. If you are suspecting the counsel is not true, you should send out a letter to the opposing party (or have your client do so) with the supposed counsel carbon copied asking for confirmation of their attorney information.

      4. OP here. A, the paralegal, is the relative of one of the other parties–not my client.

    4. I would send an email to her stating “Based on your representations in our phone call, I believed that you were an attorney and [law firm] represented X. Now, I understand that [law firm] does not represent X and you are not licensed. Under these circumstances, I will limit my communications to X about [matter].” I might forward the email to the practice group / office / firm managing partner. Then, I would not respond to anything she said or wrote moving forward.

    5. Ethics attorney here. You need to check your rules of professional conduct about reporting and read them carefully. You may be a mandatory reporter. And see Model Rule 5.3.

        1. yeah she said she was calling from a law firm. there is no lie there and OP not pumping for more details – what kind of family member? Who are you? What’s your capacity? etc. – got her the information she wanted.

          OP didn’t ask for an LOR, she didn’t talk to her client, it’s all a little shady and I don’t think chasing down the paralegal or her firm fixes the disclosures OP made.

  8. Did anyone else read the R29 money diaries of the woman in Salt Lake City who was a family lawyer and purportedly made $700k? So bananas!

    1. That was such a wild ride…once I read they had NINE kids I was waiting for her to mention how they adopted some of them, but apparently, nope!

      1. I absolutely did not think this Money Diary was real for so many reasons. Not the least of which she claimed to have 9 kids, get everyone ready in an hour, and wear different makeup every day. And she said that insurance for a family of 9 costs like $137/month. And she makes $700k as a family lawyer in her mid-30s in a medium to low cost of living area after so many maternity leaves. Just all of it was too crazy.

        Several people showed up in the comments claiming to be OP (!!) and at least a couple of those posters said that several of the children were adopted and there were two sets of multiples. Who knows if any of these people were actually the OP, but if it was real at all, I do think some being adopted and/or more than one set of mutiples makes sense.

        1. I had no idea that the divorce rate in Salt Lake City was so high that being a family lawyer was so lucrative! Maybe I should move…

        2. I think in the actual diary she mentioned “my seven-year-olds,” so maybe she had twins. The other things that got me (besides everything you mentioned) were: mention of husband’s fertility issues (or not?? NINE!), the incredible number of times they had sex, and the meals and snacks she was just whipping up out of nowhere, nbd. The dishes from that alone would take me all day.

          1. My parents have nine kids and had a lot of fertility issues. For them it meant we ended up really spread out, but in other cases it can mean fertility treatments (some of which increase the chance of multiples).

        3. I am a partner at one of the bigger/fancier commercial law firms in Salt Lake. The legal community is relatively small, there aren’t tons of women and very, very few attorneys of color “at the top,” and almost no one makes that kind of money here (even among the grey haired, rain-making, Mormon men). I know who the most expensive family law attorneys in town are and none of them fit this profile – I’m pretty sure this is at least partially a work of fiction.

          2. Do they change some details to help people stay anonymous? I know when I posted on here under a regular screen name I’d change up some facts. Like if I wanted advice on my brother I’d say it was advice on my sister. I gave out enough personal info that I wanted to make it more anonymous somehow. Like if I lived in Maine and someone asked where I lived I might say Vermont because the two are so similar demographic and weather wise.

        4. Seriously. There’s no reason way a foot lawyer makes that much unless you are handling celebrities or high net worth clients — and even then it seems unlikely to me.

          1. Uhhh family lawyer. Not foot lawyer. But also: the comments seem to suggest it’s a brand consultant. Holy cow, do they make that much money either?!?

      2. OK I’m not even done reading yet but cannot believe she and her neighbor (who have a “similar” number of kids) trade babysitting…adding 9 to the mix for the evening??! Wow.

        1. I mean … Mormons. This family wasn’t LDS but I’m sure there are plenty of local LDS families with a lot of kids

          That being said though – the Mormons I know dont socialize outside if the religion so probably don’t swap kids

          1. Yeah, a Mormon mom voluntarily watching 18 children actually doesn’t ring false to me (I grew up around Mormons). The part that does ring false for them being Mormons is that the wife has a high-paying job. Unless, as some commenters were suggesting, it’s a family-owned firm and either her or her husband’s parents or grandparents are bankrolling them.

    3. Yeah, that had to be a troll post. Ridiculously low health insurance costs for a familly of 11 and a cancer history and fertility issues (his)? Financing a car for $50/month instead of buying it outright? Having 9 kids including a 4 month old and having daily gardening sessions ? Plus their crazy high salaries for what they did.

    4. Someone mentioned this on another forum I read and said it’s a 13 year old Mormon girl’s fantasy about adulthood, and that seemed pretty spot on to me.

      Another point that jumped out at me as implausible is that she’s basically been having a kid every single year (with a slightly bigger gap between the 3 and 5 year old) which means that, assuming her pregnancies are full term, she’s gotten pregnant almost 10 times in <3 months each time. Getting pregnant so fast over and over again in your mid-30s, is really unusual, especially while breastfeeding (which she says she does). And I say that as someone who got knocked up at 33 the first time I tried, so I know it does happen.

      1. She has multiples so it’s not quite that many pregnancies, and some women do experience a period of increased fertility after giving birth even if they are breastfeeding. That being said, the 13 year old Mormon girl’s fantasy of adulthood theory seems compelling to me.

      2. I have not fully fact checked, but I have heard the earlier you start having kids, the longer you are fertile (generally) – so if you starts in your 20s, you have an easier time getting pregnant throughout your 30s. I have a SIL with nine kids and no multiples.

    5. I am less than 10 years out of law school and a classmate at my firm charges twice my billable rate. I do “respected” work – think corporate/M&A/traditional business advising. (I am NOT knocking any other fields – quotes for a reason!) He does traditional family law – all divorce, some custody. He works fewer hours a year, bills fewer hours a year, and is in the top 10% of billed/collected at a firm of 50 lawyers, mostly stuffy older men who look down on him for his field of practice but….can’t argue with his billable rate.

  9. For estate planners, do you get a sense of how often people leave assets in trust (as opposed to outright) b/c the beneficiary just makes bad decisions and really should never have that power? I get that you use it with kids, b/c they are young and we don’t want them able to buy Ferraris with $ that should be used to, say, finish college (but it would not be awful if they bought a house outright at 22 after finishing college vs going to law school with remaining funds). I am seeing that some adults that I know just have such bad decision paralysis or make such bad decisions that I’d never leave them funds outright (vs a nephew in college who has routinely shown good judgment). Like Tsar Nicholar II: I don’t make decisions, but when I do, I make spectacularly bad ones.

    1. I’m curious too. But honestly, there’s only so much you can control. I think that all of the people who are likely to leave me $ probably think I’ve made bad financial decisions OR would spend the money in a “stupid” way when they are gone. My ILs in particular are appalled that we 1) give significant sums to our church (maybe 5% of our income); 2) would consider private LACs for our kids and/or help them with grad school; and 3) bought a house in what they think of as a “bad” neighborhood full of crime and drugs (which is actually in a nice part of town with good schools) even though the value of the house has basically doubled in 10 years.

    2. Estate planner here. We recommend trusts anytime there’s a significant amount of money being left to beneficiaries, solely for asset protection reasons. E.g., your child is in a risky profession (surgeon) and may have liability risks or to protect from potential divorce. These reasons are much more common than bad behavior concerns (although those happen too).

  10. Update on the Dad Who Won’t See the Doctor:
    The scans came back late last night, and it turns out he has a burst appendix. While I’m relieved he doesn’t have cancer or kidney disease, it’s still pretty darn serious. It ruptured so long ago that it’s “obliterated,” to use the surgeon’s word, and he has an abcess and major infection. Send good thoughts that the surgeon’s plans to get rid of the infection actually work, and that this was a giant wake-up call to not ignore glaring warning signs that something is wrong. He’s damn lucky that he didn’t go septic, according to my RN sister. :(

    1. Oh no! I am so sorry to hear this. I did not get a chance to weigh in on your original post but I 100% feel where you’re coming from. My dad (age 69) has been rapidly losing weight and having bowel problems and just now, after months of this, is going to the doctor. Frankly I fear the worst, and I feel helpless. So just know that you’re not alone.

      I am glad this is something they can address quickly and your dad is very lucky, and also lucky to have a daughter like you who cares about him. If you are okay sharing, I would like to hear updates on how he’s doing.

    2. OMG that is just crazy. Good Lord I can’t imagine how anybody could ignore that level of pain.

    3. Wow! I had a burst appendix and abdominal abscess when I was 16. The burst appendix happened but the surgeon still did laparascopy, which is not typical. And then two weeks later, I kept telling my parents my back hurt, and that’s when they found the surgical sponge the doctor left in me. I wanted to sue, but my parents didn’t want to go there. Anyway…the appendix pain was EXCRUCIATING. Like I woke up at 5am doubled over in pain, profusely sweating, crawled to my wall intercom (remember those?!?!). The saddest part of all of this was that I was supposed to leave for sleepaway camp that day, and camp was a no-go when I was in that state.

      I hope your pops heals up fine. I was so much better after they fixed me the second time (and I insisted on a different surgeon!!!). All abdominal surgery is a bit of a rough recovery, but he will be much better soon!!!

  11. Can someone explain mascara with curved wands? I’ve googled it but can’t understand how they help curl lashes or even how they are supposed to be used! Is the curve supposed to be on a horizontal plane or vertical plane? If vertical, should the curve be held like a U or the opposite?

    1. I’m sorry, but I laughed out loud at this. It’s very obvious how to use it once you are holding the wand. The curved shape helps fit to the natural shape (curved) of your eyelid, so that you don’t have to angle the brush in to get the inner lashes.

          3. LMGTFY ;)
            Sorry, kidding, I couldn’t help myself. I had to look it up too. Apparently it stands for “today I learned.”

  12. Hi! I’m the anon whose cat was sick and whose ex was being a jerk about it last week. I spoke to the vet and kitty’s condition is non-life threatening and can be managed with medication, so I’m going to be taking her in. I have a four month old puppy who is sociable but a little too enthusiastic about everything and hasn’t ever seen a cat. The cat is six and hasn’t really been around dogs much, plus she just went through a traumatic illness and isn’t in great shape. Any advice on successfully socializing cats and dogs? So far my plan is to lock kitty in my office/guest room with all her stuff and let her chill there for a while.

    2. I’ve successfully used scent to help animals get used to each other. Take a soft piece of clothing that you’ve worn so it smells like you (I usually take a t-shirt that is ready to become a rag), and put it somewhere near the puppy. You could cut the t-shirt in half and put it in the puppy’s bed. Do the same with the cat. After a day or two, switch and give the cat the item the dog had and vice versa. Also, groom them just a little with the same brush. This co-mingling of the smells has worked for me several times, I don’t know why.

      Your pets will also signal to you when they are ready. Growling and banging at the door — not ready. Sniffing at the door in an interested way — getting ready. When you do introduce them, do it at a quiet time and make sure they have escape routes if needed. If they don’t get along at first, separate them but don’t yell. You want them to have positive associations with any interaction. Since your dog is still a puppy, he is likely to be most interested in getting the cat to play, and she may not care.

      1. Add on to this, a few times before you introduce them fully, let them swap rooms for a little bit, so puppy can go into the office and smell all the things that cat has touched and the cat can go around and explore the house that smells like the dog. I did this once or twice when I was introducing a new cat to the house.

    3. Keep them in separate rooms for at least a week. It will be hard but they wilk get used to each other’s scents and sounds. From there you can do limited supervised introductions, and eventually integration.

      1. +1 to all this, and to the strategies suggested by the poster at 10:49 are helpful too (letting them smell each other’s blankets/toys, and watching how they react through the door. Be super patient and calm – eventually (probably) they will learn to tolerate each other, even if they never become friends. That is the situation in my house. I dreamed of cute cuddle sessions; instead they just observe each other from across the room, and that is good enough.

        I’m glad she is OK and wish you the best!

    4. A four month old puppy can certainly learn to co-exist with a cat pretty easily. A four year old dog would be a lot harder. I’m glad you got your kitty back!

    5. In addition to what has already been suggested, my mom uses Feliway (or something similar) for her ever rotating crew of fospice/hospice/foster cats (which integrate into a home which has resident cats and a scaredy cat dog).

    6. I’m so glad the kitty’s illness turned out to be manageable! Pets are hard enough without jerk exes. You’re doing the right thing and the puppy should yield to the cat’s authority pretty quickly. We didn’t know a thing about animal intro when we brought a German shepherd puppy to our apartment lorded by an ex-stray we picked up off the street a few years earlier (not in US). She kicked the puppy around the apartment for a few minutes (to our terror, of course) but it was all fine after that. The cat eventually had kittens and they lived on top of the dog with mama cat’s approval and thought it was their personal heater (again, not the US, I can’t believe how irresponsible pet ownership was there but also female spay was almost a death sentence because the only vet office in town was so dingy an infection was inevitable).

    7. I’m glad she’s doing okay and you are able to take her. I haven’t done a similar permanent intro but I agree about keeping kitty separate for a bit to acclimatise. I have two indoor cats and have let people bring puppys over and to be honest the tired puppy has been so sleepy sometimes they haven’t noticed the cat sniffing them.

    8. If you have a baby gate, you may want to use that for the first in person meeting and keep each on their own side.

  13. I switched to using toothpaste without SLS and I still get semi regular canker sores – currently on #3 in two weeks. Any other suggestions for what to do to prevent them?

    2. Canker sores are the worst. I’ve never figured out a trick for preventing them, but the gel that forms a film over them is so helpful for the pain. The antiseptic mouth rinse also helps – wonder if it might help with prevention too?

      Strangely, I used to get them pretty frequently…at least a few at a time every month. I just realized the other day that I haven’t had one since WFH/isolation started!

    3. Always rinse your mouth immediately after eating or drinking (besides water), and thoroughly clean your lips and the corners of your mouth. Don’t just delicately wipe with a napkin, treat it like a localized face wash.

      I had to start doing this when my lips were cracking from starting tretinoin, and kept doing it because it makes such a huge difference. I no longer need to be a lip balm addict, either.

      If you’re eating something greasy (chips, meat, hot sauce) that water can’t carry away alone, use a cleansing oil to help.

    4. Without knowing what toothrush you use, I’m wondering if it would be beneficial to switch that out as well?

    5. I get them when I eat too much sugar, which is apparently a common trigger. Maybe there’s a dietary cause?

    6. So this is super rare but I figured I should mention it. I have crohns disease and when I was young I would get serious oral ulcers that were misdiagnosed as regular old canker sores. Once I finally got the crohns diagnosis we realized those were actually a crohns flare. If you also have digestive problems it’s worth mentioning to a doc.

      1. Yep, canker sores can be ulcers instead. I sound like a broken record, but I got canker sores 2-3 times a month prior to my celiac diagnosis. Now I only get them if I’ve accidentally had gluten. See a doctor if you have any other digestive symptoms and have them explore both Crohns and celiac plus ulcerative colitis.

    7. It might be something else in the toothpaste, not necessarily SLS. I had canker sores for the longest time, switched to SLS free toothpaste, was OK, then got them again when I switched SLS-free brands. Turns out the sorbitol was the culprit all along.

    8. I get them from pineapple and citrus fruits. If I avoid those foods, I don’t get them at all, but as soon as I slip up, I get one.

  14. I want to take advantage of COVID to drive out West and be itinerant for a while. I’m thinking like all/ a portion of the Rocky Mountain states, and I like on the East Coast. I’m a management consultant so I have a lot of hotel points, and I could sustain myself on relatively cheap hotels for a while, and I have a fuel efficient car. The hotels will be hard though, b/c husband will also need to take client calls and it’ll be hard to do that in the same room. What’s the most inexpensive but also logistically workable way to do this? I thought about camping in national parks, but overlap with wifi there may not be sufficient to enable me to do a full day’s work every day. I can use my mobile hotspot though. A friend of mine is doing something similar and living out of a van, so I might see what exactly she’s doing, but appreciate any thoughts to see how this can work.

    1. If you’re going to insist on doing a trip like this during a pandemic, do everyone else a favor and live in an RV the whole time. Don’t go to hotels. One person can take client calls in a chair outside while the other works at the tiny RV table inside.

    2. I friend of mine is doing this with an RV.

      I listen to podcasts and many of the podcasters reference the fact that they are in the closet because the acoustics work well. Do you have enough points to get suites, so that one person can take a call in the living area and the other in the bedroom? If not, I would use a good headset and take a call in the bathroom.

    3. Just as an FYI, I did a week-long trip in the southwest a few years ago (to Utah, Arizona, southern Colorado) and I was surprised by how poor the internet connection was at most of the hotels, especially outside of major towns/small cities. And definitely do not plan to use hotspot on your phone because it won’t work well in many places. Not sure how relevant this is to the Rockies, but just something to consider.

    4. I’m not sure where you are thinking in the Rocky Mountains but Colorado and Wyoming are both seeing snow in the higher elevations this week. Rocky Mountain NP, Yellowstone and Glacier could see significant snowfall by month end. I know there are many other national parks in the Rockies but this doesn’t seem like right time of year to plan something like this.

      1. Yeah it’s probably a bit late for that part of the country. will likely have to go south.

      2. I actually think it’s a great time of year for travel out west, but you should definitely be aware of the weather. Many national park campgrounds and high altitude passes close surprisingly early in the fall (check websites). You may need chains on certain roads if you get snow in higher elevation areas (as in you’re not allowed on the road if you don’t have chains). If you want to camp or hike, you need appropriate gear. If you don’t have that gear or any experience in mountains and snow, you need to stay south and at low elevation.

    6. You’ll have to be careful about where you go if you regularly need cell and data access. I’ve driven cross country through this area a couple times and done several trips to the national parks in California and Yellowstone and there are lots of areas where you lose data service and sometimes cell service completely, even on major interstates. I have AT&T- Verizon may be better? Cheap hotels generally don’t have great internet, so if you need to do any video calls, that’s probably out too.

    7. I’m a management consultant as well, and saw a recent post on Fishbowl about someone wanting to do this. The consensus was that it would be hard due to internet bandwidth in many parts of the country and I agree. When I’ve visited national parks, hotels tend to have terrible internet (as in, can barely check email, no way you could stay on a VPN or do a video call) , and I’m sure you know from experience that even name brand hotels can have awful wifi.

      As far as two people taking calls in the same room, I’ve been there. My husband visited me when traveling for work in the before times and we’ve had to juggle both having a call at the same time. It’s impossible to do in one hotel room; one of you will have to take the computer to the breakfast area or find another spot in the hotel.

      1. This is a good point. We have sonic gigabit Internet (Bay Area) and a mesh network and we basically don’t think about WiFi at home. We did a short road trip to a rental house last week to look at a college campus for our senior in HS.

        Kids had zoom classes every morning.

        The rental house WiFi could barely handle two of them on zoom at the same time. Husband and I had to be entirely off the WiFi while the kids were in class. Kids both had to set up zoom class near the router to get any signal at all.

        It’s just not a consideration at home and was kind of shocking.

  15. I’d like to learn more about budgeting. Not individual budgeting – corporate budgets, government budgets. Are there any non-textbook resources, videos, etc. you would recommend? I’m smart but didn’t take a lot of math or whatever field this is, actuarial studies? (So don’t want to just read a historical treatise analyzing GDP or a textbook).

    1. This is accounting and finance. Look up resources for financial statement analysis

      1. Assuming you’re asking about how they’re constructed. If you want to be able to read them then yeah, that’s accounting.

    3. One of the things I’d really like to do is to read a well written engaging book about how the federal government budget/spending/deficits/debt work. I believe that first needs to exist, but whoever writes it – I’m buying at least one copy. :)

      1. I had to read The Showdown at Gucci Gulch in college and it was a fascinating look at the sausage-making of tax reform. It was a bit dated even then, but sadly, some of the members of Congress are still in office….

  16. does anyone know what criteria NY/NJ and other states are using to decide which states to but on the quarantine list?

    1. To get off the quarantine list the state has to have both: Less than 100 new cases per million citizens and less than 10% positivity. They appear to be using the same (or very similar) numbers to CovidExitStrategy, which at least in my state are quite different than what my state reports.

      1. This is NY, fwiw. Not sure about NJ and other states. My in laws are in NY so we’ve following that state.

    4. CT is following the NY guidelines
      MA is similar
      RI has different/more strict guidelines
      Chicago following similar to tristate
      NM also has some

      All are listed on their state’s sites. For easiest results, google “STATE travel restrictions”

      1. NM updated theirs today. It’s under 80 new cases per million and under 5% positivity based on a rolling 7 day average.

  17. What kind of socks do you all wear with boots? I need to buy new ones and I never really figured out the idea socks for boots.

    2. My mom got me Heat Holders two years ago as a stocking stuffer, and I started wearing them year-round. They come in three lengths and three thicknesses, so I wear the ultra-lite in the summer and the original in the winter.

      I have weird feet (triangular with wide front and narrow heel) and could never find boots that were either comfortable alone, or had enough room for the accessories I need (mole skin, insole, etc.). The Heat Holders have enough padding themselves to act as a cushion.

    3. I don’t think of them as specific boot socks, but all of my socks are Bombas. Highly recommend. For tall boots (which i still stubbornly am holding onto even though I never wear anymore) I wear calf height, for booties I wear the quarter socks.

    4. What height are the boots you wear? That’s the factor I take into account with socks and boots.

        1. I typically do ankle height socks since quarter can peek over the tops of some, especially when walking.

  18. I am in a currently low transmission Covid area that will probably get worse soon as it gets colder and schools start. I have been very risk adverse – I do curbside pickup wherever available, so I haven’t been in a grocery store in many months, I only get takeout from restaurants whose takeout pickup is well segregated from their dining area, etc, although my husband has been back to work (masked all day) for about a month. My mental health is suffering and I am thinking about adding an in-person yoga class at a studio in a converted mill (30 foot ceilings with huge windows) limited to 8 people in the class. As far as I know, the studio doesn’t require masks during class, although I would wear one. For someone risk adverse, is this a terrible idea? I just haven’t been able to get myself into any sort of consistent movement habits at home, so my hope is that attending a weekly class would help me get back into the habit – maybe I would even just do it for a month and then stop as we get into colder months. I see all these people around me taking much bigger risks every day and I feel like this would make a big difference in my mental health.

    3. If I were single, had no kids, and was not otherwise at high risk I’d do it. I assume they are opening the windows when possible?

    4. I know what you mean about seeing people taking bigger risks every day. I’ve started seeing more people on my social media eating inside restaurants, flying for non-essential travel, and working out in a gym. It makes me a bit envious but I still feel like I’m making the right decisions for myself and my family.

      My understanding is yoga is better than HIIT from a COVID risk perspective because people generally aren’t breathing as hard in yoga. But if it were me, I would still look for a yoga class that meets outside.

      1. Shopping in person just isn’t a priority for some people. She might find it’s easy to do without and she doesn’t miss it, so why bother going back even if it only mildly increases her risk. It’s not like going through a grocery line or self-checkout does much towards fulfilling the need to be social. I don’t go home from grocery shopping on cloud 9 because the checker said, “lovely weather we’re having today” to me.

        1. + I dine outside and go into the office but I still don’t go into grocery stores. Don’t feel the need to spend my risk capital there.

    6. Call ahead and ask if a mask is required – it is likely that they do require it. If they don’t, with your risk acceptance level, I wouldn’t recommend it. Unless you’re wearing an n95 or equivalent mask to the class, you are putting yourself in harm’s way – not saying that you will get Covid but it doesn’t make much sense that you’ll do only curbside but will do an indoor exercise class with no mask.

    7. Only you can decide if the risk is worth it, but it does seem like a large risk “jump” for a self-described risk-averse person to take. Mitigated options include: a weekly outdoor class, walking with a “buddy” outdoors, and private (aka required) virtual yoga classes. Have you considered those? If you do go, you could mitigate the risk by selecting the first class of the morning, and looking into a mask with demonstrated virus filtering for you (like Cambridge Mask – but deactivate the vent). That said, if you are interested in becoming less risk averse, that is also OK and you CAN decide the full risk is worth it to you.

    8. No, I would not do this unless everyone was wearing a mask. Indoor exercise is insanely high-risk.

    9. I don’t see others addressing your comments about mental health. I think you need to balance your mental health with your physical health, and obviously you do too. I would happily take yoga at this studio if I were in your shoes. Also, try going in the grocery store. The fear/picture in your head might be worse than reality.

      1. Mental health is important, but there’s a whole world in between “sit at home alone and depressed” and “yoga in a huge studio with no masks.”

    10. If you’re really not going out anywhere then even if you for some reason do get Covid at yoga you’re not spreading it around at the grocery store or wherever, right? I mean yes it does have risk to go to a studio indoors but if you’re doing your part to be responsible otherwise then good for you.

  19. Wondering if anyone can recommend some fun pants to wear home, for lack of better terminology. Basically not sweats but also not pajamas, more like the equivalent of a somewhat glam caftan But pants, that I can wear at home now that summer is coming to end but that are also fine to walk the dog in (I currently walk the dog in my caftans ;))

    My inspiration struck watching Indian Matchmaking in the episode where Apurna is having wine with her girlfriends at home, wearing black silk (looking?) floral pants. Other than some $150+ jcrew versions, I haven’t found much. Thanks for any leads!

    1. Ooh I love some of those J.Crew prints. No specific sources I can suggest, but I’d look for something like this on Etsy,

    3. What about the elephant pants ubiquitous in hippy stores, originally from Asia. Cliche but comfortable for home and dog walking.

    5. Wide-legged linen pants would be comfy and cute, maybe these:
      https://oldnavy.gap.com/browse/product.do?pid=599624002&vid=1#pdp-page-content
      or these:
      https://www.chicos.com/store/product/Wide-Leg-Drawstring-Leaf-Print-Linen-Pants/570287152?color=5076&CMP=csc_goog_pla&gclid=CjwKCAjwqML6BRAHEiwAdquMnfs00EpDXO2psMk5elgTW7WmL6YX5rleDKeiTbv83rn-zmzt8k-pfxoCgD8QAvD_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds
      or these:
      https://www.freepeople.com/shop/fp-one-aloha-printed-wide-leg-pants/?color=102&countryCode=US&gclid=CjwKCAjwqML6BRAHEiwAdquMnUHkYyMeD0mBeP–goHlGChMWngaitERcw59WviqaX0hLEORTrHzVhoChw8QAvD_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds&inventoryCountry=US&size=S&type=REGULAR&quantity=1

    6. There are some shops on Etsy from India with gorgeous prints. Maybe search for palazzo pants?

      I’ve been on the hunt for the perfect caftan for probably five years now. Needs to be either cotton or linen, in a beautiful print, and under $100. Seems I can never get all three and there are a lot of beautiful caftans in the $200+ range, but turns out I’m not actually Elizabeth Taylor in form or in my bank account, so.

      1. haha, I ordered both of those pants from Loft. Kept the Floral Tie Waist ones and returned the red Wide Leg Crop ones since they looked terrible on me and gave me early aughts gaucho vibes. Recommend the Floral Tie Waist pants!

    9. Google FAB India for cotton pants with fun prints.
      They deliver internationally

  20. What do you do with work clothes that are too worn out to look professional, but not bad enough to toss in the trash? I’m not going to wear blouses and slacks to do yard work, and the material isn’t something an animal shelter could use (not absorbent). Donating feels like passing the buck. Is there another option?

    1. Look for a textile recycling program. My local Goodwill has one. Some schools in my area are dropoff points and they actually get money from Goodwill based on the weight of the donations.

      1. +1. I think every Goodwill facility recycles the clothing they cannot sell, so donating to them would not necessarily mean your clothes will end up in the trash. It’s one of the many things I like about Goodwill. Goodwill donations are also tax-deductible, if that matters to you. H&M’s textile recycling is also a good option.

    2. You can bring them for recycling if they can’t be repurposed. My H&M used to take stuff like this (also great for old bras, sheets, etc.)

    3. Sounds like they are in fact worn enough for the trash if there’s no other use for them.

    4. I typically either over dye or redye solid coloured pieced or upcycle damaged/patterned garments by sewing the good bits of fabric into something new. Clothing is one of the most socially and environmentally detrimental industries so I do everything I can to opt out.

      1. And you do this while working more than 30 hours a week and progressing in your career? I am asking since this is ostensibly a site for “overachieving chicks” and yet I keep seeing posts like this from people I am convinced are voluntarily unemployed, as they seem to have all the time in the world to spend on personal projects. If you are in fact an “overachieving chick” and you’re really sewing new garments from bits of your old ones – sakes alive, I am amazed. You must share your time-management techniques with us. Myself, I am working ridiculous hours in an attempt to hold on to my job as we face potential layoffs at my company. I have a high-level position and salary and will have a tough time getting a new job if I lose this one; that’s what’s front and center for me right now. I barely have time to do laundry.

        1. Huh? This is a fashion blog and some people come here to talk about clothes. Consider whether your work stress is overwhelming you and coloring your judgement … maybe you should come here to take a break, not to amp up your anxiety by attacking anyone who might be overachieving at work and at home.

        3. I work 40h a week in a regulatory policy position, my salary is firmly upper class. So I’d consider myself high achieving, yes. I find time to do this stuff in the evenings, I find sewing to be a creative hobby, some people scroll through insta, I cut up fabric!

  21. Opinions wanted – if you have the choice, how important to you is it that your appliances all come from the same manufacturer? We’re building a new house that we plan to live in for a long, long time (so not worried about resale) and I’m thinking of buying appliances this weekend. But I can’t find a whole kitchen appliance suite that I like each appliance. I really like a refrigerator from one brand, but the matching range is way more expensive (like $1500 more) than the more basic one that I think we’d like just fine but is from a different brand. The dishwasher needs to have high ratings while not being super expensive – which is definitely doable if I mix and match.

    I’m definitely getting a different range hood so it doesn’t have a big brand in the front center of it (why do manufactures think I want their name in the middle of my kitchen forever?), so that is already going to be mis-matched.

    I’m mostly going back and forth about the range – the more expensive range does look nice, but worth it just to match?

    1. I like appliances to coordinate in appearance but do not care about matching brands. I care more about having the best for us option in each item.

      1. This. We have a range and microwave from the same manufacturer and it’s nice b/c they are right above each other. The fridge looks v. similar but is from a slightly fancier brand b/c it was the only one that had all features we wanted but the footprint we needed. Our dishwasher was new when we moved in so we didn’t change it even though it technically looks different (it’s white whereas all the rest is s/s) but it works with our kitchen color scheme so I think it’s fine.

    2. As long as the “color”/tone/shininess of the stainless was the same, I would be fine with it. I’ve always had different brand appliances and it’s never bothered me. I’d want to get the best of whatever I could buy in each category, especially if I was planning to live there forever.

    3. I’ve had mine match (when I renovated a kitchen) and not match (now, in a different home) and realize now I don’t care at all. When they matched, I should have prioritized a quieter dishwasher over matching. I just replaced my dishwasher and fridge in my new place—they didn’t match before here and still don’t. I just worked to align the finishes.

    4. I personally would match the fridge and the range but as long as they look similar enough (handles same style, etc) I don’t think it matters. Dishwasher definitely doesn’t matter. I will say thought that I had once bought a stainless steel stove and the finish did not quite match my other appliances from a different brand, so I had to return it. It was noticeable and looked silly.

    5. To me so long as they are same color and not right next to each other, it’s perfectly fine – especially if the appliances are on different sides of the kitchen. Appliance do look better when the approximate color matches, but they don’t have to be exactly matching – stainless steel can only look a certain amount of different than another brand’s stainless steel. As for a different range hood get a contrasting color, as that is fairly noticeable.

    6. Refrigerators seem to have the most dimensional variation, so I’d make sure that you’re set on that first. Our fridge has a “pocket” and if it dies, we have to re-get something in that exact shape, which isn’t awesome.

      Stoves are usually 30″ then 36″ then 48″ then 60″. Fancy European versions are something metric that is maybe 39″? At the ultra high end, if you just have an Aga range or LaCornue, no one expects a matching refrigerator. I think that the matching pressure is higher in between high end and builder-grade.

      We have had many GE Cafe products and I loved my old Profile Range (30″ with dual ovens that I used all the time). We put our microwave in our pantry and have a convection oven / microwave in our kitchen now (also GE Cafe). Of our 4 kitchen appliances, only two match.

    7. Handles matter! Make sure you’re not getting widely different looks on the handle of dishwasher, refrigerator and oven.

    8. Thanks everyone – sometimes hearing other people say the things is very helpful! I’m going to try and see if I can match the brands of the range and range hood, then just go for general style for the rest.

    9. I’ve shied away from lines that intentionally stand out and force you to buy all the same. I won’t buy Kitchen-Aid again because our dishwasher showed up with giant red rings around the handle that look like Coca-Cola branding (the sample we looked at did not have them, despite the company swearing it was the same model).

      If you’re just looking for all black or all stainless, you can make it work. All white is harder because it isn’t currently in style.

      1. 99% sure you can buy a replacement cap in stainless so it won’t stand out!

        1. … yup, search for “Kitchenaid medallion”. Can you tell I’ve been stove shopping and had the exact same thought about the red?

          1. Yep, I paid the extra seven bucks for the stainless steel medallions at Home Depot. Problem solved.

          2. Y’all are awesome, I am totally buying these ASAP! Had no idea replacements existed. Now I can stop seething in resentment every time I load the dishes.

      2. By any chance is it just a red covering that you’re supposed to take off once its installed?

    10. You’re either making a (very slight, IMO) compromise on aesthetics if you use different brands, or are compromising on quality if you use the same brand for all appliances. I think it’s wiser to choose the best option for each appliance and not try to match brands. If you really want them to match, choose your favorite brand for two of them (say, your stove and fridge are both Kitchenaid), then choose the least obtrusive/obviously branded but still high quality for your dishwasher, etc.

    11. We moved into a house where they had done a very high-end kitchen remodel. They took the “best of everything” approach rather than the “all brands matching” approach and so we have a Sub-Zero fridge, a Wolf range top, a Thermador oven/microwave combo, and Fisher and Paykel dish drawers (that broke almost immediately and were replaced with a top-rated Maytag stainless-steel interior dishwasher with a hard-food disposer. Anything you read online about Fisher and Paykel dish drawers being awful is true, in my experience). The appliances they couldn’t put panels on (they did so for the fridge and the dish drawers) are stainless, so the look is unified. Like others, I don’t want a black-enamel appliance and a white-enamel appliance and a stainless-steel appliance all in the same kitchen, but if they are all the same finish and all good-quality, I don’t really care about the brands. P.S., if the Sub-Zero goes out it’s getting replaced with something nice, but much cheaper, as I don’t care to spend $10k on a fridge.

    12. I cared about all my appliances being GE Cafe when I remodeled my kitchen. As I’ve had to replace appliances I have learned that no one notices whether they have the exact same handle shape but me. So my fridge is now Whirlpool, and my dishwasher is KitchenAid. As long as they’re all stainless steel, they look fine together.

      Ps my dishwasher is my third since the 2008 remodel. When the second one was beyond repair, I asked the repairman which dishwashers have the fewest problems in his experience. He said KitchenAid. This one has lasted longer than the two prior ones combined.

  22. Anyone taken a course through Shambaugh? They are offering a course this fall in women and leadership that looks interesting. Other recommendations welcome – I’m looking to invest in career self-development for the Fall.

        1. No. I don’t click links when I don’t know what they’re about. Especially in environments where you don’t know the poster and it could be spam/malicious. Ain’t nobody got time for that.

          2. Please do not take the Lord’s name in vain. Why oh why would you break a commandment over this?

          3. The title of the article is right there in the link, you could have just googled it.

    2. Thank you; I know what you found powerful about it. :) I subscribe to this but hadn’t seen it so thanks for sharing.

  24. I don’t love the texture of my neck these days. I’m 35 – maybe this is aging? But it just feels a little rougher than my face, if that makes sense? Anyone noticed the same thing and any suggestions?

    1. I’ve always been told to take care of your neck and decolletage the same as your face, so I extend all product down there. If your neck is rougher than your face, use mild acid peels (the kind designed for daily or weekly use on the face) and a retinol product and it should soften up.

      But tbh, unless your neck looks 65 and your face looks 35, it probably isn’t noticeable to other people, but I understand wanting to change it for yourself.

      1. Absolutely. Everything I put on my face goes on my neck and decolletage. Excluding eye serum and eye cream, everything goes on the neck – peels, serums, vitamin C, daily sunscreen. Even sheet masks I pull the solution and extra on my neck.

    2. Use all the same products on your face on your neck. Neck aging is totally a thing. See: Diane Keaton’s turtlenecks and Nora Ephron’s “I Feel Bad About My Neck.”

    3. Yeah, and I wish I had noticed it when I was 35 and started to do something about it. On the bright side, I started using the Gold Bond neck and chest cream from the drug store, and it’s actually made a difference.

    4. StriVectin TL Advanced Tightening Neck Cream Plus. Learned abut it here and strongly recommend. I will be 60 in December and use of this 1x a day has made a huge difference. Buy at Costco – there are sales every once in a while (including right now).

    5. I am doing microneedling, and have them extend the coverage area down my neck. I just had the first done last week, and it takes a few weeks to see the effects of collagen regrowth, but I am hopeful.
      I have some neck lines from looking down and desk work. I use product on my neck and only apply in upward swipes from décolleté to jaw.

  25. Is anyone else an extremely short waisted pear shape? I am trying my to improve my work wardrobe as I am slowly going back into the office and I’ve finally realized that my usual work uniform of button up blouses, worn untucked doesn’t look very polished. I cannot tuck in shirts as I’m extremely short waisted (barely three inches between the bottom of my ribs and top of my hip bones). Any ideas for style of tops that are flattering to elongate my midsection and don’t need to be tucked in?

    1. I usually wear knit tops or sweater material, not tucked, to create a lower waist appearance and also to actually show the waist. I know what you mean about unpolished. Otherwise, a blouse tucked in that is more form-fitting. But really never button-downs as I can’t make them not look sloppy and like I don’t have a waist.

    2. Try buying tops from the petite section– they’re shorter in length, so they will hit at a more flattering place. I actually have started wearing more tops that are tucked. I think I look much more polished as you can see my waist. Otherwise, a more flowy shirt makes me as wide as my hips.

  26. I’ve been busy lately and haven’t been able to read through stuff here regularly– did we ever get an update on the woman whose husband’s mistress left a scrapbook account of their adventures in the OP’s house? Did OP kick him to the curb and change the locks?

    1. I have been thinking so much about her. I hope she is doing well!

  27. Anyone have any experience with cubital tunnel syndrome (the funny bone nerve being impinged and causing pain and numbness down the arm to the fingers?) I’m seeing my doc but of course no appointments today.

    1. Probably too late, but I have been working through this for the last 18 months or so. My doctor was supremely unhelpful in the diagnosis stage and said it was carpal tunnel, which sent me down the wrong treatment path for ages and didn’t assist.

      Eventually I ended up at a sports chiropractor for an unrelated issue and mentioned my frustration with my “carpal tunnel” and my lack of improvement. She was skeptical of the diagnosis and after an assessment at a separate appt, determined it was likely cubital tunnel syndrome. I was given a few specific nerve flossing exercises to do on a daily basis and they really, really help. I’ve also had to make some lifestyle changes to avoid things that I know exacerbate pain/symptoms, such as typing/mousing on a laptop in my lap while sitting on the couch.

      I’m in Canada and my supplemental insurance has great Chiro/physio/massage coverage. I don’t think I would have ever seen a chiro otherwise because they seemed pretty “woo” based on what I know, but the experience I had was outstanding and based in science.

  28. Just a heads-up that Out of Print is doing a 2-for-1 sale on tees. I got ahead on my Christmas shopping, and I know other folks here like them too.

  30. Yesterday there were quite a few recs for the AE jeans for pears. Can anyone speak to sizing? I’m usually an 8 in gap, ON, loft.
    PSA they are having a good sale this weekend for anyone interested.

    1. I’m usually an 8 at AE and am wearing the BR Ryan in a 4 today. (Sounds like AE sizing is skewed!)

  31. Successful ladies – what are your tricks for performing well under extreme pressure?

    I just took my first LSAT yesterday and am pretty sure I bombed it. My practice tests have been in the 170s so I felt good on content, but my nerves were so crippling that I could not think on the most basic of logic games. I feel like I probably scored 10-15+ points lower than I have been on practice tests despite knowing the test’s content was very reasonable/on par with what I’ve been seeing on practice problems. I don’t ever remember that kind of test anxiety during undergrad, but yesterday it paralyzed me because of how much seems to rest on success on this test. I just could not get the “omg you think think think. You have to do well” out of my head, so much that I couldn’t actually think.

    Have any of you gotten over performance anxiety like this?

    Thank you!

    1. I had the same issue back when I took the LSAT (way back in, like, 2009-ish). I’d always been an excellent standardized test-taker, had never been stressed out by any test of any kind, and had done tons of timed practice tests. But I completely freaked out when I took the real thing and couldn’t perform well, had shaking limbs, etc.

      Chances are you probably didn’t actually under-perform as much as you thought (unless you had to leave a lot of questions blank?). I cancelled my first LSAT score because in my day law schools supposedly still averaged LSAT scores for admissions purposes (so an unusual low score in your file would supposedly harm your chances), and I ultimately regretted it, I think I should have kept my first score.

      As for actually dealing with the test-day performance anxiety, I followed the recommendation of my LSAT prep course instructor and took a low dose of a beta blocker on test day. (10 mg of propanolol, taken approximately an hour before the test, and I tested it out on one or two other occasions while taking timed practice tests to make sure it would work ok for me.) It worked perfectly, and I was able to perform in line with my practice test scores.

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