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Frugal Monday’s TPS Report: Silk 3/4 Sleeve T Blouse

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Uniqlo Silk 3/4 Sleeve T Blouse | CorporetteOur daily TPS reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices. This is the final TPS report from Stephanie Rahlfs of Adventures in the Stiletto Jungle. Thanks so much, Stephanie!

I am a huge Uniqlo fan. When this Japanese brand's only U.S. store was in NYC, I would return from twice-yearly visits with bags full of Uniqlo finds. Now that we have several Uniqlo stores in the San Francisco area, and their online shopping is up and running, you'd think the obsession would have worn off. Nope. I still can't get enough. Their basics, like cashmere sweaters and silk blouses, are an outstanding value. I just counted — I have seven Uniqlo cashmere sweaters. That's love.

Right now I'm smitten with the Uniqlo Silk 3/4 Sleeve T Blouse. It's cut similar to a classic Vince silk blouse, with an open placket and relaxed shoulder. This blouse can be worn either tucked in or outside of your waistband, and lighter shades can be paired with a camisole for extra modesty. Best of all, this work-appropriate 100% silk blouse can double for weekend wear — just picture it with your favorite boyfriend jeans! It’s available in black, off white, beige, and blue (pictured) for $49.90. Uniqlo Silk 3/4 Sleeve T Blouse

Seen a great piece you'd like to recommend? Please e-mail tps@corporette.com.

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105 Comments

  1. Sorry for the instant threadjack – I have a shopping query! My sister recently started her first “grown up” job and it entails a lot of traveling with her 19.5 inch monster of a company laptop. I’d like to get her a nice work-appropriate bag to carry it around, but I haven’t been able to find anything big enough to hold it. Do any of you ladies have suggestions for an extra-large, tote bag style laptop case?

    1. Not a tote bag but maybe since it’s such a beast (I can’t imagine carrying that on a regular basis), a laptop sleeve + a separate bag might distribute the load a bit better? I know some people dislike carrying multiple bags but that’s a ton of weight on your shoulders.

      1. Yay! Fruegel Monday! But I am confused? Isn’t it suposed to be pricey Monday’s? Anyway, welcome back to the HIVE! BTW, Kat, I LOVE UNIQLO. They have a store on FIFTH Avenue that I alway’s stop into and I have some sweater’s I leave in the office when it get’s chilley in here. Great Pick!

        As for the OP, I can NOT beleive your sister has to schlep a 19 1/2 LAP TOP! I onley have an 11″ MacBook Air and that is heavey enough, so I do NOT carry it around except when I need to — last week, when I spilled coffee on my work machine, the teck guy took it away so I had to use my own computer. It is NOW back on my desk, but smell’s a littel funny. I think he must have oiled the key’s or something. FOOEY! But at least it is workeing.

        I wound up staying in NYC for the 4th b/c of bad weather–it was very cold in the Hamton’s until Saturday, so Myrna and I tried to watch the firework’s from my apartement’s roof. We could NOT see anything but the manageing partner’s brother and Harold came over with deli so it was NOT a total waste. The manageing partner’s brother kept oogleing Myrna also. I think he needs a woman to take care of him, so mabye he will find someone else. He convinced Myrna to drive out with Harold and me to the Hamton’s on Saturday afternoon, and we had an OK time on the boat with Margie and the Manageing Partner. Harold kept telling us that he is in some skateboard contest — I said he was to old for that stuff, but he is goeing to try out for some TV show. What a waste. His dad is not thrilled with haveing to support him and his apartement, especialy b/c he is lookeing to move in my buildeing soon. I do NOT know what it is with bald guy’s. They think that women will fall all over the place for them. I am NOT attracted to that. FOOEY! I like a guy with hair. YAY!!!!

    2. I’d look for a rolling bag- a small carry-on, litigation bag, or mobile office type bag. She’ll ruin her shoulder carrying a 19.5 inch laptop around.

      1. +1

        I have one from Swiss Gear I think that my office ordered for me. It’s super functional and not that bulky looking – plus if she’s only travelling for one day/night, she can also use it as her carry-on and not have to travel with multiple bags.

        1. I think I have this same bag. Bought it used, but it gets the job done. Lots of pockets for files and tech devices. Kind of semi-hard outside. Fits under the airplane seat.

    3. I small combination rolling laptop case/suitcase. If she takes a lot of short trips, it all goes into one bag and it’s easy.

    4. Downpayment for visits to a chiropractor? Her back is going to need it :-)

      That said, I’d try for a roller bag with that much weight. No suggestions on particular models.

    5. Years ago, when I traveled for work, I used a Samsonite rolling office. It wasn’t pretty but it got the job done.

    6. If you check eBags, they let you put in the laptop model and then they’ll give you bags that will fit it. This came in handy for my ridiculously big work laptop.

  2. Yup! As far as I can tell, UNIQLO is the best source for what a commenter here called “architectural dressing.” Their tees are great, and come in interesting colors. And I love their inexpensive jackets – although a careful try-on is important to check fit.

  3. I love Uniqlo. I find their sizing slightly wonky (I have a large shirt that’s snug, a medium sized that’s too big) and wish there was a store in my city so I could go and try things on.

    1. I had no idea they had an online presence – this us exciting! I thought they were lost to me when I moved out of New York. I’ve had some Uniqlo pieces for *years*.

      1. Yep, Uniqlo was one place I was able to buy pants that were long enough while studying in Japan (5’10”).

      2. That’s another thing I look forward to when moving to the US in 5 weeks! I love UNIQLO, but we don’t have it here in Switzerland and I bought at least 10 items each time I travelled to Japan. Their clothes are smart, but not tooo fancy or trend-based, and on top of that they’re really good quality for the price! Just the right style for a 30+ scientist who will be frowned upon when she’s wearing a blazer and non-jeans.

      3. I have a Uniqlo hoodie I bought about four years ago now and it’s beginning to show its age but I can’t replace it for love nor money.

  4. Another big Uniqlo fan.

    All my printed T’s, leggings and cords come from here (for printed T’s in particular, they’ve really nailed it on quality), I’ve laid in a long-term supply of moisture-wicking exercise T’s from their new Ines de la Fressange line and last week, I made the happy discovery that they’ve brought back the swingy T-shirt dresses which I loved last summer (witty prints, short and sweet hemlines).

    For cold weather, I love their puffy vests for adding warmth under a dress coat (they come in enough colours that I can usually get a perfect match with my coats). And the well-priced cashmere of course !

  5. Have any of you worked with a recruiter before? Did you pay for their services, or were they paid by the company that inevitably hired you? I was contacted by one recently, and I want to know what I should look for/watch out for. Thank you in advance!

    1. Yes, I recently went through the process of getting a new job with a recruiter who cold called me about a position. They are paid a commission by the company that hires you, I think in the ballpark of 10-25% of your annual salary. My recruiter was extremely helpful, in that he had placed several candidates with this company before, so he was able to provide me with really good information in preparation of my interviews. I think you just need to remember that their number one goal is to get you in the job, so they get the commission and my not necessarily have the best interest of you/your career at heart. Like any line of work, I’m sure there are excellent, ethical recruiters and some not-so-great ones.

    2. I’ve been contacted several times, and once I actually responded. I assume they are paid by the company and it essentially comes out of your signing bonus or salary if you want to think of it that way.

      I’m in a technical field so they weren’t much of a help – matched me with positions that weren’t at all what I did or what I said I was looking for.

    3. I got my current position via a recruiter. The good ones will contact you before you even are looking and whether or not they are working an opportunity that you are a fit for, to establish a relationship, and will check in from time to time. The good ones also have experience in your field. At least for me in tax, that has been a huge differentiator. Recruiters without a tax background do not have a good sense of what positions are a good fit with my experience. I can’t tell you the cold calls I have gotten from totally clueless recruiters who I wanted to hang up on for wasting my time.

      From an employer’s perspective, while it’s painful to part with the fee, the overwhelming majority of good candidates I have found for positions I have hired for have come from recruiters. They have the network and it pays off. 25% of a year’s salary is better than taking months to fill a position or settling for the wrong person because no one better was available.

    4. I have worked with recruiters before. Some are great, many are hacks. Don’t work with anyone without vetting him or her (or their firm) first via some friends or professional contacts. You can get really burned by recruiters spamming your resume around town, so if you do talk to a recruiter, make it absolutely explicitly clear that you are only applying for one position and do not give permission for them to send your resume onward for any other purpose. Put it in writing in an email and make sure that they understand via a phone call too. Reason being that they have targets from their bosses and need to gather enough candidates for reqs, so they may be “sharing” your resume without your permission. Proceed with extreme caution.

      My experience is primarily with finance (banking/IM) and legal recruiters, so YMMV may vary with other industries.

      HH can be a fantastic resource for salary info and recent trends.

  6. Uniqlo is my go-to store for microfiber undies (no VPL). I remember in one of my sprees, I bought 15. They are that good.
    I also stock up on the heatTech undergarments, they come in short sleeve, long sleeve, legging style and have helped me extend the wear of many pieces as I transition into colder season.
    The cashmere sweaters are a good value, I took a cable knit one which I wear a lot, however it tends to pill.

    1. Thanks for the tip on the microfiber undies from Uniqlo. They look good and might replace the Shimera briefs I get from Nordies. I’m going to wait for the Anniversary sale and see if the price gets as low as Uniqlo, if not I’m going with Uniqlo since I need to stock up as well.

    2. I went into Uniqlo recently and they changed the cut of some of their underwear. Some of the styles has a short rise and cheekier backside. Not sure if that applied to the microfibers, though.

      1. The microfiber ones are low rise and good coverage on the backside.
        I am thin and curvy (African features) and have not had any issues with these

  7. So you guys were very very right on the Jockey Skimmies recommendations! Love them so much.

    1. I recently got a pair too and love them. I’d like to get a pair of the shorter-length version, but the reviews seem to be a little more mixed on those.

      1. If anyone has the shorter-length, please weigh in! The long ones are a little too long for most of my weekend skirts, so I have to hike them up a little and it’s awkward.

        1. I bought a pair of the shorter-length, and they roll up on me, which is not a problem with the longer ones.

        2. As someone who carries weight in my legs, they aren’t long enough to stay in place at prevent the rubbing (which is the whole point). It may be different on another build…

        3. I have both lengths & the shorter ones are a tad too short (I could use an extra inch) but when I size up, they tend to stay in place & are almost as awesome as the longer ones. They definitely don’t show with my weekend wear (unlike the longer ones, which I just use for work).

    2. I was an early adopter of the original regular length skimmies and sang their praises far and wide to everyone I know. After a year, mine were looking a bit worn, so I “upgraded” to the anti-static and they were terrible! They were high in the front and low in the back and slid down to the point of almost falling off every.single.time. I then tried the short version of the original, and the legs rolled up – I have ample thighs and they weren’t long enough to stay put. So I bought the regulars again and they are perfect. If I’m wearing something shorter, I tug them up a bit, and it works fine. Haven’t tried the wicking ones yet, and probably won’t unless I read a surfeit of rave reviews.

      1. Yes, I also love the regular Skimmies, but the same size in the anti-static slide down when I walk and feel like they are going to fall off. They are fine with pants to avoid VPL, but I wouldn’t recommend the anti-static with skirts – although maybe they would work in one size smaller than my regular size? I’m not going to spend the money to find out, I’ll just stick to the regular

  8. Y’all, I want to say it here:

    I am dressed as a grownup today: The Skirt, microfiber layering tee, great blazer (thank you consignment gods!).

    2. Great top, but I’m wondering about the upkeep. The website says “hand wash cold.”
      Experienced uniqlo folks, does the top need ironing as well? Hand wash + iron will probably make it too much effort for me.
      It also looks like the open placket will require a cami for coverage, see-through or not. A tailor could probably sew in a snap into the placket though…

      2. I usually just throw all my tropical wool and silks into a delicate cycle then steam out any wrinkles. Haven’t had any problems on the silk shirts from Uniqlo.

        I also do this to the cashmere sweaters. No problem there either.

      3. I put all my handwash stuff in a bra bag in my normal laundry load. I usually hang it or lay flat to dry

      2. If the flowers are more coral than red, I would wear a navy blazer. Otherwise, I love it.

        1. I agree, but no-can-do. The dinner is rapidly approaching, I own grey, navy, and black blazers (and some patterned ones, but I think we can all agree that houndstooth plus this dress = disaster ;) and I can’t shop between now and then.

          1. I’m seriously cracking up over “houndstooth plus this dress = disaster”

            I vote navy or grey. I’d try both. I really like the dress.

  10. I wish there was a Uniqlo in the DC area. Rumors have been circulating forever that one is coming.

  11. I have a question about hierarchy at law firms.

    I have been on a file with one other lawyer. We split the work fairly equally, but he is more senior so he typically takes the more senior roles on the file. It has worked well.

    I have been very busy lately and another mid-level (above me, but junior to the other colleague) was staffed on my file because I will be doing a lot of work on another file soon. I am worried, and have started to notice, that I am going to be pushed out of doing the more senior things that I have been doing well for the last little while. For example, I feel as though I will not get to argue any motions (right now I do about half of the motion) since I will be the most junior. It is concerning me and also making me a bit upset because I know I have been doing a great job so far on this file (have been told many times), yet now I feel like I am getting pushed out of something I have been doing for over a year now. It feels unfair to me that someone can just step in and take over my job.

    Anyone know how to navigate this? I feel like I need to advocate for myself so I get good opportunities and responsibilities. The partners have no idea that it is concerning me.

    1. Right now, those lawyers are your clients and doing a good job for them is what your job is. The better you do, the faster you will probably get to do something of substance. If you really have the time, maybe try to take on a pro bono project that will get you out in front. FWIW, unless you are in the tiniest of firms or somehow tied to the government (prosecutor / defender), I don’t see a lot of first years arguing anything. It’s great that you’re eager, but the bigger the firm, it more likely it is that the senior people are still itching for the experience you want.

      Maybe look at it from the ultimate client’s eyes: you might be great, but they want the partner (or senior attorney) arguing their case and not the first year.

      1. Oh I’m not a first year anymore…I’m well into my second year/almost third year. That’s an old handle :)

      2. I think your last sentence is very important – experience is great, but a lot of clients don’t want to give first year attorneys experience on “their” case. And also, welcome to law firm politics.

        If you’re worried that the new attorney is going to start taking your opportunities at professional development, then start asserting yourself and requesting more experience. For example, when you’re drafting a motion or response and you know that it will be set for a hearing, tell the senior associate (or applicable partner) that you’re comfortable/interested in arguing the motion. Tell them that you are interested in taking and/or defending depositions, as well. I also wonder if, with this file and a first year getting such substantive experience, that they didn’t add this mid-level attorney as an opportunity for him/her to get experience that he/she is lacking.

        If it’s a client issue, you asking for more responsibility gives the senior associate the opportunity to tell you “Hey, I’d love to let you argue, but the client prefers someone with more experience.” Maybe that way you’ll at least know where you stand and why.

        1. I hear you, but I don’t think it’s a client thing. The client has been happy so far with how things are going, it’s really just this guy isn’t on a file (trial ended not too long ago that took over his life), and I am going to be pretty busy with another file.

          FYI, I’m a second year almost third year now. Maybe it’s time for a new handle!

          1. I’d just focus on doing really good work on your new file. It seems like everything is going well for you (if not at your preferred speed). Your internal reputation is what will get you where you want to go (and external one, to the extent you have client contact). You may be great, but the client doesn’t want to have the sense that you’re punching above your weight class (and you don’t want to be that person, either). See if you can volunteer for moots or other experience (client developments, CLEs) that will help you out in the long run.

          2. It sounds like a standard staffing thing and no reflection on you. Plus if you actually will be busy in the future, I don’t really see what the problem is. Do you think that you’ll have too much free time with this other attorney on your old file once your new case starts up?

            I would just keep doing a good job so that others in your firm think of you for future assignments. And I think that part of that is not being high maintenance. You don’t want to be remembered as the one who did a nice job but couldn’t share work/couldn’t work on a team. You have to balance advocating for yourself (def important) with showing that you can play well with others. In this case, where staffing changes seem to make perfect sense, I don’t think you’re being a doormat by going with it.

          3. Okay thanks everyone. I don’t want to seem like I feel entitled or anything. I understand the firm culture and the nature of the beast, just sort of wanted a gut check on how things should go. It just can be difficult when you have to regress instead of progress sometimes but that’s life.

    2. This is just the nature of the beast in large firms with multiple attorneys staffed on the file. They file a hierarchy, and when a new lawyer gets added, they move into their “rank” on the file, not necessarily the bottom of the line.

      If you were the midlevel or a even partner, would you expect to have work delegated to you by a second year just because they’d been assigned to file longer? Probably not. This sort of thing is frustrating, but it happens all the time and is just part of the process. Work flows (or ought to flow) down to the lowest rate person who is able and available to do it efficiently – here, you’re dividing the pie more ways and hence getting the “dregs”. This is why working for a firm that staffs leanly is so valued. That said, hang in there and know that it isn’t personal.

      1. I’d agree with this…you don’t go to the back of the line on a deal / file just because you are new. Things are done according to what’s appropriate seniority and availability-wise. Just think of it this way–you will jump onto files in a year or two and take over motion drafting for something that you are new on…just something you have to be patient with, even if you feel as though you have more background with the case or client. Them’s the breaks.

  12. I made a huge mistake and messed up an internship assignment. It’s fixable but tell take some ime. It was one careless/didn’t think to check mistake that had a big affect. My boss probably thinks I’m useless, but was very nice about it – saying it’s a learning opportunity, etc

    Any stories to make me feel better?

    1. It is certainly a learning opportunity. I started out my legal career in criminal cases (think DA/public defender). I got sanctioned by two different judges for not doing things on time. Now I’m in front of both judges all the time as a more senior attorney, and they both highly respect me and serve as mentors for me.

      Just let the good quality of your work speak from here on out.

      We all make mistakes. What makes the difference is how you react and what you learn from them.

    2. Oh, also I clerked for a different judge, and there was a huge rule that court files could not leave the courthouse. If we didn’t get our work done, we could make photocopies, or take notes, but could not take the court files home.

      One of my fellow clerks took a court file home to her house to work on. And she spilled her dinner on the briefs in the court file. At that time, the court’s official record was the hard copies in the court file. Oops.

      She admitted her mistake to the judge she worked for, and asked for forgiveness.

      That former clerk is now a magistrate judge herself.

  13. Oops, this was supposed to be a reply to Bad Intern!

    When I was in college, I had a summer internship in the archives of my university. The university owns a number of personal items previously owned by a major southern literary figure. Some of these items were on display in the museum part of the archives, and some were in boxes in the stacks. I was putting a box back on the bottom shelf of one of the stacks, and pushed too hard, and a box fell off of the other side of the shelf. I ran around to see what I had knocked off, and found this beautiful glass star shaped lantern (of course, previously owned by this literary figure) in the box that had fallen. And it was broken. I FREAKED OUT, went to my boss nearly in tears, sure that I was about to be fired. Turns out it had been broken all along, and that’s why it was in a box in the stacks, rather than on display with the other one in the museum. I was a lot more careful putting boxes back on shelves after that. We all do dumb things when we’re interns. Part of being an intern is the learning experience.

  14. More love for Uniqlo. I went into a store in SF a few months ago and found the “twill jersey” jacket and loved it. The jacket is more structured than it sounds — and woven, not knit, as far as I can tell. I bought the cream, but immediately ordered black and navy when I got home. they are great — lightweight for summer but nicely tailored with good details; I’ve been leaving them in the office for over-air conditioned days. And now they’re on sale!

    I also bought a nice, basic trench from Uniqlo online; I was concerned about fit but it is great.

    http://www.uniqlo.com/us/product/women-twill-jersey-jacket-086659.html#69

  15. I love Uniqlo, but many of their colors do not work on darker skin tones–I find that their colors have too much blue and not enough yellow in them (esp. their sweaters, which also have very low v-necks). As a result, I stick to buying tops that are ivory or cream colored from them, or skirts/trousers. In particular, I like the Ines de la Fressange collaboration.

  16. Ack! The uniqlo website is giving me a headache. I’m getting old, since all I really want is a website with rows of pictures of the items for sale. Bonus points if it all loads at once and there aren’t other weird pop-ups/animation to annoy me!

  17. Hello ladies. My DH and I are expecting our first baby around Thanksgiving and will tour a daycare tomorrow. Do you have any tips for questions to ask or things to look for?

    1. Some tips: Ask if you get a written “report” every day or something similar — how many dirty diapers, how many oz. of milk/formula given, nap length/time, etc. Some places do this — they have a form they can easily fill out for each day and it’s very helpful. Check online for reviews of the day care center ahead of time so that you can ask about anything specific that you see there, positive or negative. Even though your baby will obviously be too young for discipline, ask about how they handle it. Although I’m sure they can spin this somehow if the reality isn’t great, ask about employee retention. Some places have a parents’ handbook; ask for a copy so you can check out their policies. There are some good checklists on baby sites but they are huge and list every possible question ever, so I would suggest looking at them and picking the ones you feel are most important. ETA: Ask for references you can call/email. Of course the references they give you will say positive things, but you can still get some good info.

    2. You might want to e-mail around where you work or put on FB that you’re looking at day cares in your area. If you can get connected up with parents who are at or have used the center, that’s golden.

      For newborns, see how the caregivers interact with each other and the babies. Also, where do the babies sleep (cribs are great — being in a swing can make the baby sleep all day at daycare and be up all night, so I’d watch for that)? Do they get to get any fresh air during the day (e.g., going on walks or having a play yard)? Once you start solids, do they provide baby food or do you need to bring?

      Also, what is the hitting / biting policy? One of my daughters was a biter and the other had a hitter in her class. It’s not discipline at this age, but teaching appropriate behavior (and ultimately keeping everyone safe). Also: will they document / call you when something happens (fall / bite / fever / vomiting)?

    3. A few thoughts:
      – How is the center governed? Corporate or parent board? We use a non-profit center with a parent board, and it is very responsive to parent concerns.
      – Are there any current parents you can talk to?
      – What is staff turnover like? High turnover can signal issues.
      – Is the staff engaged with the kids, or talking to each other/messing with phones?
      – Do the kids look reasonably clean and happy?

      Finally, trust your gut. If you get a happy/comfortable vibe you’ll be a lot happier and more comfortable dropping off the baby, which will make you both happier in the long run.

      1. I agree with all of the above, and wanted to add that if you plan to keep baby in there long-term, check out the older kids’ classes and think about whether the teaching style fits in with your parenting style (or what you think your parenting style will be), e.g. more academic vs. more play-based – whatever your preference is.

        Also – how do they handle holidays (when are they closed, and is that going to be a big problem for you), and late pickups?

    4. Tour the whole place – not just the baby/infant section. Chances are you are going to stick with the same daycare for a while, so make sure you like the whole place. Is the section for older kids preschool or just daycare?
      -Ask about the waitlist and what it will take to get off it. We love our daycare, but its way oversubscribed for infants, and they give preference to younger siblings of current families, so we have more than one friend that never got off the infant waitlist until the toddler years, and had to go with a different daycare in town until a spot opened up in the 18+ months section.
      -Employee retention is huge, in my experience. Having a few new teachers is not a bad thing, but more than one “long timer” (in my case, several 20+ year employees) really says something about how the daycare treats its staff, and therefore, how happy the employees are to work there.
      -Get a list of what the cost includes at each place. Will you have to pack your child’s lunch everyday, or is it provided? What about snacks, diapers, formula etc?

    5. A few things to look for —
      — Does each baby have its own dedicated crib that they use every day?
      — Are the cribs in a separate, quiet space (usually in a room or alcove to the side of the main room)?
      — How are the caregivers addressing babies who are crying? Picking them up? Waiting for other teachers to pick them up? Pay attention to the subtle, unspoken ways that the caregivers are interacting with the children like that.

      Also, make sure you feel like the director is competent and in-charge. I love our daycare, where the director is the owner and she is on-site everyday, going in and out of the classrooms all day long, and very responsive on phone and email. One of my friends doesn’t like her daycare, and a big reason is that she feels like the director is not very responsive and doesn’t seem to have good management over what is going on in the classrooms on a daily basis. I think this makes a big difference in how well the centers are run and your happiness with the center in the long run.

    6. Ask about transition intervals (how long they stay in infant room, how long in toddlers). The daycare we have now had infants thru new walkers in the infant room, which I liked because my son had the same staff for over a year and I felt like they really loved him. Plus the further developed kids help the less developed kids along.

      Ask about their formula/b-milk policy, especially if you are pumping and nursing.

      Ask about the sick kid policy (thresholds where kiddo is sent home like temperature, loose BM’s, throw up, etc. and how long they have to stay home.

    7. Everyone has already covered the main points, so I just have a couple to add. You don’t mention whether this is a center or in-home. If it’s in-home, I’d definitely ask about licensing, and about immunization policies (my state does not allow immunization exceptions for licensed caregivers, but some may).

      In either case, I’d also ask about emergency procedures. Both an individual life/limb-threatening emergency, and an external event that threatened the facility itself.

      1. This is a daycare center. It is highly rated and in a federal agency (not the one I work for but one near our home and right next to the building where by DH works as he’ll be doing most of the dropping off and picking up). They give first priority to children of employees of the agency and second priority to children of other federal employees (like me), and the waitlist for the second tier priority candidates is approximately 12-14 mos. Ack. I think we’ll have to end up on multiple waitlists and look for a nanny as a backup.

        Thanks so much to you all for your helpful advice. We’ve had so much to learn about so many things and the baby isn’t even here yet.

    8. You want to make sure they really really adhere to ratios. How much “floating” staff do they have? Make sure that EVERY time a teacher leaves the room there is a floater to replace them. How many office staff are there? Where is the office physically situated in comparison to the classrooms. If you walk in, there should always be someone at the office to greet you. (And therefore also be available if there’s an emergency in the classroom!)
      Be vigilant. When my son was 3 a toddler in his daycare was killed by a teacher who was left alone with too many kids. I blame the center as much as the teacher. She should never have been alone with any kids as she was not a “head teacher” let alone too many kids. The place was constantly cutting corners on staffing.
      More rules are better! :)

      1. This is awful but I have to ask – intentionally – like she snapped or accidentally like she couldn’t watch them all and one of them choked. Both scenarios are awful but I’d be even more shocked if it was intentional!

        I don’t have kids but you might want to ask about how they deal with chronic illness/medical issues. For example, I know of one daycare that will not take kids that are insulin dependent unless they use a pump. No syringes allowed. Others have a strict no diarrhea/vomit policy even if the kid has a medical condition causing the distress and is not at all contagious. A kid with colitis might have diarrhea every day. If you have chronic medical issues in your family, make sure your daycare can handle them if your child ends up getting them.

        Also, will they accommodate food allergies? Some will, some won’t. Better to know now if you have them in your family.

        1. She snapped in the moment after being alone with 8 toddlers. (Guideline is 5:1 ratio)
          Daycare owners tried to get another teacher to lie and say she was in the room. Owner was charged with obstruction of justice, teacher with 1st degree murder.
          We moved to a more corporate center after that and the differences were huge.

    9. In retrospect, I’d ask how many times per year they had to close unexpectedly- and why. You can compare various centers to see who is more reliable in snow/bad weather etc. ours has closed twice since October for non-weather relented issues- one, a CO2 detector went off on Sunday night and per regularions they had to be inspected before they could re-open. The other was when there was a massive power outage and the school lost power- in the winter. Apparently it impacted the heat, so the building was closed. No, they didn’t have a generator.

  18. Bridesmaid question: I’m going to be a bridesmaid in late November. I am currently trying to get pregnant. I have been trying for 4 months, but only figured out when I’m actually ovulating last month. I think there’s still a very good chance that I will get pregnant before the wedding, and a decent chance I could get pregnant soon, so that my body will change at least a little bit before November.

    My wonderful friend who is getting married wants us to wear long dresses, but we can pick the specific style and dress as long as they are in the right color scheme. I don’t want to leave it until the last minute because I want to feel pretty and comfortable in my dress, but I have no idea what I should plan for. Should I just get the dress that fits me now? Should I get one with an empire waist so it will accommodate a little belly? Should I get one a size too big and just have it taken in, if necessary?

    2. Get something that will allow a little give. Something flowy, an empire dress, or something in a wrap style. I did show until my sixth month with the first, and seven weeks into my second, I already feel round. Every pregnancy is different. Here are some options:

      http://www.anntaylor.com/silk-georgette-v-neck-gown/304441?colorExplode=false&skuId=15940605&catid=cata000035&productPageType=fullPriceProducts&defaultColor=1028

      https://www.jcrew.com/wedding/Wedding_Bridesmaid/silkchiffon/PRDOVR~93075/93075.jsp

      http://shop.nordstrom.com/s/jenny-yoo-vivienne-pleated-chiffon-gown/3778867?origin=category-personalizedsort&contextualcategoryid=0&fashionColor=CHARCOAL&resultback=3000&cm_sp=personalizedsort-_-browseresults-_-1_9_A

      1. I love that J. Crew dress. I’m assuming that the dress can be tight and fitted on my ribcage and likely not be affected by any pregnancy weight gain (assuming I don’t just start letting myself go). Is that a good assumption?

        1. “Worst” case scenario, I would not necessarily assume anything tight/fitted anywhere, including the ribcage, would be able to fit you once you are 4 months pregnant even if you haven’t put on a lot of weight by then. I do think if you are tall or if you are less than 4 months pregnant you will have a lot more wiggle room.

          To provide a counterpoint to the suggestions that you won’t look very different for the first 5 months, I’m 5’3, and by 4 months in with my first, I had only gained 2 lbs. However, my body changed shape very dramatically by that point… to the point where I kept weighing myself because I could not believe how different I looked with so little weight gained. I lost weight in my arms and legs, but I looked like I was rocking a major beer gut, and my chest had gone from a DD to an F (the chest thing happened in the first 2-3 months– and I second the poster who suggests buying something you can wear a real bra with. My chest hurt SO badly when it was growing). My ribcage also expanded to a degree I did not expect, pretty much an entire band size. Something else I did not anticipate was how sick I felt when I wore anything tightly fitting, but I had pretty wretched nausea until about 16 weeks.

          I’ll add my vote to the “wait a month and see” side. Good luck!

    3. I’d wait a month to buy the dress – you’ll have a better idea of where you will be, and you’ll still have lots of time to shop. E.g., if you got pregnant in August, you would be three months along in November and I’d do with Anon @2:30pm suggested. If you weren’t pregnant in August, you probably won’t be showing that much by November even if you pregnant in Sept or Oct.

    4. I think you’re more likely to feel pretty and comfortable if you wait til the last minute/a month before and buy something that fits you then.

      1. Absolutely agree.

        I like the options linked above, but I would really wait until a month before to buy. It’s true that most first-time moms don’t show by then, but your bust will most likely increase and it’s really hard to know the extent of bloating or where a flattering and *comfortable* waistline will be.

        If that’s anxiety producing for you, I’d buy a couple of size/style options now from a store with a good return policy.

      2. Thanks everyone for the comments! I suppose it’s best to give it a month or two and see what happens.

    5. Most people who are pregnant for the first time do not show at all for the first three months and just look a little thicker for the first 5, but no bump or anything that would affect your clothing size in dresses. Pants, yes, but dresses you should be fine in even if you got pregnant tomorrow. Buy your current size, one size up if truly on the cusp.

      1. I agree with this except for the first trimester can bring huge changes in breast size. So, while your belly likely will not show, your boobs could be much larger than before.

        1. Second this. And for that reason, I highly recommend you consider dresses you can wear an actual bra with – a strapless bra when pregnant would be my idea of torture, my breasts were so tender/sensitive.
          If you are ordering from a bridesmaid’s line (as opposed to a department store dress), you should ask what the lead times are – I’m in a wedding in early November and one of the bridesmaids was just told that if she didn’t place her order asap she would have to pay extra for rush processing – the designer requires very long lead times.

    6. I think the body change between now and November will be minimal, especially if this is your first. Get something that makes sense for a body fluctuating in weight (not a body-con style dress) and size up. Then you can get it taken in where it matters. And, most official bridesmaids dresses are designed to be able to be let out *at least* a size–so ask at the store to see where the dress you’ve picked out falls.

  19. It’s been a few years since I’ve shopped at Ann Taylor. Do people think their sizing charts are accurate? With my JCrew purchases the last few years, the sizing charts have been way off the actual fit. Any hints/suggestions? I need a suit quickly and will be ordering online, but will likely order a couple different sizes and styles just in case.

    1. I buy from Ann Taylor all the time. I feel like their sizing is pretty spot-on and consistent. I feel like their quality has dropped in the last few years, but their lined suiting is still great. JCrew sizing drives me nuts.

    2. Their sizes are consistent, but a bit big on me. I consider myself to be a true 6, and I buy a 4 consistently from AT in pants and dresses, smalls in tops.

    3. I find their size chart to be pretty accurate. I do agree that I’m generally a size smaller there then elsewhere.

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