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Nov. 2024 Update: The Nordstrom Anniversary Sale is over for the year, and we don't yet know when the 2025 Nordstrom Anniversary Sale will be. Stay tuned for their Half-Yearly Sale, which usually starts around Dec. 23. (Unfamiliar with the NAS? Check out this page for more info on why it's the best sale of the year.) Sign up for our newsletter to stay on top of all the major workwear sales, or check out our roundup of the latest sales on workwear!
The below content is about the 2020 Nordstrom Anniversary Sale.
As I noted in yesterday's roundup of comfortable shoes in the 2020 Nordstrom Anniversary Sale, there are a TON of platform/chunky/lug sole/combat-like boots in the Nordstrom Anniversary Sale this year. My feet really like Eileen Fisher shoes, and these wedge booties look like they might be great for running errands in everything from casual dresses to ankle crops and beyond.
They're currently marked to $149 for the final two days of the NAS; after prices go back up on Monday they'll be $265. They're available in sizes 5-11 in black and graphite (pictured).
Some of the other options in the combat boot trend…
Pictured above, $44-$99: croc embossed / combat boot / water- resistant lace-up / waterproof hiker boot
Pictured above, $99-$299: croc print combat boot / lug sole / Tory Burch lug sole / crinkled patent
This post contains affiliate links and Corporette® may earn commissions for purchases made through links in this post. For more details see here. Thank you so much for your support!
Sales of note for 11.5.24
- Nordstrom – Fall sale, up to 50% off!
- Ann Taylor – Extra 40% off sale
- Banana Republic Factory – 50% off everything + extra 25% off with your GAP Inc. credit card
- Bloomingdales is offering gift cards ($20-$1200) when you spend between $100-$4000+. The promotion ends 11/10, and the gift cards expire 12/24.
- Boden – 10% off new styles with code; free shipping over $75
- Eloquii – Fall clearance event, up to 85% off
- J.Crew – 40% off fall favorites; prices as marked
- J.Crew Factory – Up to 60% off everything + 60% off clearance
- Lo & Sons – Fall Sale, up to 35% off
- M.M.LaFleur – Save 25% sitewide
- Neiman Marcus – New sale, up to 50% off
- Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
- Talbots – Buy one, get one – 50% off everything!
- White House Black Market – Holiday style event, take 25% off your entire purchase
And some of our latest threadjacks here at Corporette (reader questions and commentary) — see more here!
Some of our latest threadjacks include:
- What to say to friends and family who threaten to not vote?
- What boots do you expect to wear this fall and winter?
- What beauty treatments do you do on a regular basis to look polished?
- Can I skip the annual family event my workplace holds, even if I'm a manager?
- What small steps can I take today to get myself a little more “together” and not feel so frazzled all of the time?
- The oldest daughter is America's social safety net — change my mind…
- What have you lost your taste for as you've aged?
- Tell me about your favorite adventure travels…
Anon
Might repost this next week since weekend threads are usually quiet but here goes anyway…
My husband and I are planning to relocate to another state. Before the pandemic, we had planned to move and obtain new jobs, but now that we’ve been working from home and have seen how well things have gone and how much our quality of life has improved, we’re going to attempt to keep our current jobs and go remote. What are some of the things we should be aware of before going to our supervisors to request permission for this? Any tips for framing the request? Do you recommend laying out a written request first and then scheduling a conversation to discuss or should it be done more casually?
For context, husband works in a very specialized tech job on a team that has found it quite hard to recruit qualified people in the past (and he just got an excellent performance review). The organization has a few people who work remotely full-time, but it’s not really part of the culture and it’s unclear (although there are some positive signs) whether leadership will want to pivot to more WFH post-pandemic. Our company CEO is a known WFH-hater, but word on the street is that she is softening her attitude (and she also just bought a vacation home and appears to be enjoying working from there). We have one employee who works remotely already (a “special case”) and that employee is my supervisor. I am also on track for an excellent performance review and just got a large bonus (not on the usual Christmas bonus schedule) so I am hoping I can make the case for myself as another “special case.” I know my team doesn’t want to lose me, although I don’t know if that will be enough to overcome the boss’s historical objections to WFH.
If the requests aren’t approved, we’ll quit and get new jobs, but we’re both really enjoying WFH and would like to continue if possible. Thanks in advance for any tips.
Anon
First, do you know whether your companies employ anyone in the state you are thinking of moving to? While you are looking at this just from a retention lens, your company needs to look at this from a qualification to do business, tax and payroll lens. Your presence in a different state will subject them to either qualifying their buisness with the secretary of state, transferring your employment to a PEO, and in either case, dealing with payroll tax in another state. And if either of you are involved in sales, it may mean your company has to pay income tax in that state too. So those are pretty big considerations you’ve overlooked.
Separately, while you are well regarded now, how do you think this will affect your ability to move up or be promoted in the organization? To be mentored/sponsored? To understand office gossip (presuming that one day your home location returns to work?
Anon
No, I haven’t overlooked them – I’m not at the stage where I’m discussing extensive details and nuances with my employer yet. Are you suggesting I come to the meeting armed with facts and stats?
As for the second point, I’m not worried about those factors. I’ve seen remote work go really, really well with no impact on top performers’ ability to progress (my last company was very remote-friendly and is in the same industry, so the same type of work and work product). If I did notice problems and was unable to overcome them, I’d find another opportunity.
anon
Different anon, but I would not invest the time to make a lot of plans before gauging whether your employer is generally open to the idea of employees in more than one state. Due to the paperwork involved, this can be a deal breaker for small companies, no matter how valuable your skill set is or no matter how WFH friendly they are. I’d try to figure that out before I do anything else.
Anonymous
This. My company turned down a work from home request for a very good potential hire because she was in a state where it is difficult to maintain all of the paperwork. We have a number of other satellite offices and work from home staff
Ellen
Dad says Anon is a tax whiz, so you should listen to her. My law firm has cleints in a number of states in addition to NYC, but we all come to work here in NYC (except the manageing partner who has been in the Hamtons), so we are only worried about NYC taxes, which Frank says is alot more then other places, so he says we are covered.
Anon
Also interested in this. Does anyone have a good source for figuring out if the two states in question have payroll tax reciprocity agreements? Having trouble finding info…
Anon
I’m OP and looking into this too – my states either don’t have an agreement or I’m just struggling to find the info!
Anon
I literally just googled that and found the answer . . .
Go for it
Health insurance Is often acquired by the employer for specific state/states.
if you move to a different state almost all of your medical needs would become out of network and subjected to the deductible immediately.
Anonymous
Do you know if you company has different salary bands based on geography? Mine does, and it was a rude awakening when I took a $35k pay reduction when I moved from a Geo A (NY suburbs) to a Geo D (Midwest city). Something to research and be aware of as you make the decision.
Anonymous
Does anyone have any favorite “body rolling” videos on YouTube? I’m blanking on the term, but like when people talk about rolling out their IT band or whatever. My back and legs are achy. I just have the big thingy (like yardstick length).
MJ
I really love docjenfit on insta–she goes through different body areas and talks about strengthing exercises or best practices–she’s a PT. And she has some body rolling posts with links to longer insta videos. Check her out!
Anonymous
Foam rolling? Or “the stick”?
OP
FOAM ROLLER YES thank you
Anonymous
Foam roller
hi hi hi
As an FYI — I am rehabbing a knee injury and have been told over and over again do NOT foam roll your IT bands. It does not help (no matter how painful it is). Foam roll around them.
Jules
Kat, the link to the waterproof hikers above actually goes to a Cole Haan loafer.
Kat G
doh thanks!whoops thanks; i’ve fixed it!
Anonymous
FYI, language like “doh” is out because it can mock disabled people.
Kat G
I’ve never heard that re “doh” — huh.
Enough.
Says who?
Anon
Really? I always thought it was a Homer Simpson-ism. How is it related to the disabled?
Anonymous
+1
Anon
+1
anon
+1
Anonymous
Lol @ everyone arguing that it must be politically correct/socially acceptable because it’s Homer Simpson’s catchphrase from 1990.
Of Counsel
Yes – it is a Simpson-ism.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Doh
There is enough real stuff to be outraged about; let’s not make sh*t up.
Anon
No one claimed it was PC due to Homer Simpson. They’re correctly pointing out that the intent of “doh” was never to mock disabled people. I am also unaware of any widespread co-opting of the original word to mock disabled people today, but could be wrong.
Anonymous
I think it’s actually from South Park! Here you go: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KuTPGMDAvQs
Anon
Homer Simpson was around for a long time before South Park.
Anon
Yeah, I don’t think I can agree with that.
Anonymous
Well, I’ve never listened to this with sound, but what do you think Trump sounds like here: http://gph.is/2eYVItj
Kitten
lol
LaurenB
Oh, the language police have stopped by! I’ve also heard that we can’t say “no can do” or “long time no see,” as (supposedly) those mock Native Americans who did not speak English well. Then again, I also saw something which said that we shouldn’t use the word “moron” because “40% of Eastern European Jews were declared as such at Ellis Island.” As a genealogist and historian, that is absurdly untrue, but never miss a chance to make something up to play word games!
ThatNerdMum
Well, if you are a parent and would rather your kid be a the nerd than the cuss-er, boron works. Also, people get belirious! (in place of moron and delirious, of course )
Anonymous
You never miss a chance to say something that denigrates others based on race, putting it in quotes for plausible deniability I guess. But we see it for what it is :(
Anonymous
Do any of you watch Community? The episode where Shirley thinks Jeff and Brita are mocking disabled students because they’re making “duh” and “doh” sounds at them?
JCH
Please share your experiences with eyebrow tinting. Mine are getting lighter (greyer?) as I get older and I’d like to try tinting to make them more visible. I’ve been using eyebrow pencil and it’s fine, but I’m curious.
Anon
I just do my own every other time I dye my hair. You should use one shade lighter than your current hair, and leave it on for 3-5 mins (shorter if it’s a darker color). Make sure to put vaseline above and below your brows so you don’t tint any pin hairs that aren’t really brow hairs. That’s it!
anne-on
Someone mentioned on a facebook post that they started to use Just for Men for this purpose during the pandemic as they weren’t able to go to their normal spa, which struck me as brilliant. It IS designed for facial hair, and beard hair, like eyebrow hair, is thicker and coarser than normal.
pugsnbourbon
+1, a blonde friend of mine uses Just For Men.
anon
I use Refectocil – I used to get it done at the spa when I got hydrofacials, and then bought a kit to do it myself in between. Super easy. I do it every couple of weeks. I have very light and sparse eyebrows – I still need to fill them in with pencil post-tint, but less.
Katie
I use Just for Men for my brows and have mentioned it here several times! I try to do it once every 6 weeks or so, and it takes like 5 minutes. One tube lasts ages since I just need a tiny bit. Highly recommend!
Anonymous
I didn’t like it for mine — mine are well-shaped but the hair isn’t thick so making the sparse hair darker only gave me a little bit of a boost; I still had to fill them in with a pencil if I wanted to look like I had eyebrows. I just used Just for Men though.
Anonymous
I do it at home with a drugstore kit, totally fine. U.K. based but the brand I use is Eyelure (Dyelure) and I presume the states has similar.
eertmeert
I use Godefroy Tint Kit Medium Brown, maybe every three weeks.
I like the Godefoy kit because the color comes in little gel capsules and you open the capsule, mix some of the powder with equal amount of developer that comes in the kit in the tiny mixing cup provided (it’s super cute) and apply. I use the eyebrow brush included in the kit.
After time is up (I go 1.5 to 2.5 minutes, easier to reapply if you need to than go longer) I remove using an oil based makeup remover. This part is essential, otherwise it is harder to scrub off.
pugsnbourbon
I’m buying myself a pair of heeled doc martens for my birthday next month and I am SO EXCITED. Having them be in style is a nice bonus.
Anon
Yay!! I bought a pair of the Doc Marten combat boots a couple of years ago and was SO EXCITED because I was never allowed to have them growing up. I just saw them in a store and it hit me that I’m a grown up now and can buy whatever I want.
Anon
I’m inheriting some family owned Nancy Drew books to give to my daughter. I used to read them as a kid, but I can’t remember many details or the answer to this question – given when they were written, does anything in the writing skew sexist at all?
Anon
I guess another way to phrase my question is – did the series age well?
Pep
The series was updated several times over the decades, so I guess it would really depend on what vintage of series you are inheriting. The series started in 1930 and was last updated in the 2000s, I think.
That said, I was a huge fan of the ones I read in the 70s, and my friend and I got a kick out of reading the ones her mom had from the 40s.
Senior Attorney
I would be shocked if it didn’t. I’d suggest reading them (or at least a sampling) and then discuss anything problematic with your daughter before and/or after she reads them. (I’d be on the lookout for racism, too.)
Senior Attorney
And by “if it didn’t,” I mean “I’d be shocked if it didn’t skew sexist.”
Anon
I plan to let my kid read sexist stuff and then we can discuss it critically together. I prefer that approach because purity tests don’t work well with a lot of great literature. I’d hate to edit out everything that could be controversial and end up with a bunch of feel-good, please-everybody work that isn’t engaging – some of the best writing is “problematic” and can provide a great opportunity for critical engagement and reflection. Obviously I’m not going to seek out books that are only notable for their offensive shock value, but I wouldn’t want to throw out, say, Little House on the Prairie because it portrays racist ideas that were prevalent at the time.
Ellen
Nancy Drew is very clean. I do not remember her having s-x with anyone in the books, nor do I think she even talked about it. You are safe letting them read it. It is NOT s-xist. If we could read it and survive, so could your daughter.
Curious
They lean toward the plucky heroine stereotype. It’s cute that she’s plucky. Pat her on the head. She is mostly independent but still gets saved by her boyfriend (Ned) a lot.
LaurenB
OTOH, George (who is female) is sort of the OG non-binary.
Anon
Everyone on earth is non-binary.
Parabeagle
Is this the yellow hardcover books? If so, keep in mind they were written in the 30s and I don’t think they’ve been updated much. There are a lot of situations where men suggest Nancy shouldn’t be doing things bc she’s a young lady, but the whole point of Nancy Drew is that she doesn’t listen to that kind of garbage. There are sometimes outdated references (ie. Ned Nickerson is referred to as Nancy’s “special friend” early on) but I think that it may be a good opporunity to read along with your daughter. Nancy is a badass and she’s also quite feminine, but also progressive for her time.
Anon
IMO there’s tons of value in reading material that was progressive or unusual for its time, even if it wouldn’t meet the standards of today.
Anonymous
Totally agreed!
Anon
I’ve discovered an old author from the 20s-40s, and her stories always feature a heroine who has to get a job to support her family or support the war effort or care for an elderly relative. I’ve been a reader all my life, and I really prefer antique books because 1) the writing is far and away better technically – syntax, vocabulary, all those techniques you learned in English – it’s all just so.much.better. than modern books and 2) it opens a door to another time period that teaches history (how people lived at the time) at the same time it teaches that all things remain the same (kids doing stupid stuff; bad guys being bad; animal best friends, etc). There are so many benefits to reading old books that outweigh dated themes IMO.
Anon
That’s interesting that you say that. I remember reading somewhere that Keira Knightley prefers starring in period films because the roles for women are just so much more varied and interesting than what you find today. When I think of all the films I’ve seen with the harried working mom trope, the female-star-as-sex-object trope, the-chubby-frumpy-girl-becomes-hot trope, and all the other cliches, I have to say I believe her. I agree with you that the writing is often so much better in older books too!
Vicky Austin
Agreed!
anon
I have reread them (but its been several years) and i recall them as being more racist than sexist. It is the casual racism that is so common of that era that is really jarring now. It is very occasional and minor (primarily because characters of color are given very minor roles) but there in some books. if the child is on the younger end, you should give the books a read through. This aside, they are good and you may enjoy them too!
Anon
Right??? The first time I ever saw the n-word was in my much cherished copies of The Railway Series (foundation of Thomas the Tank Engine). Also, Henry > Thomas!
Anon
Hanna Gruen winced as Nancy skillfully backed down the long drive in reverse gear.
My sisters and I thought that line was so funny (that they had to point out she was in reverse gear as she backed up) that I still remember the line.
LaurenB
What if they did? Can’t you discuss how norms and times have changed?
Anonymous
I may have missed an earlier thread on this, but — is anyone seriously thinking about trying to leave the country if Trump wins?
Senior Attorney
Yes we are looking at New Zealand. Hopefully it won’t come to that.
Anonymous
Hello from New Zealand! Long time Kiwi reader here
Anon
How? Looking at the criteria, it’s almost impossible for 2 retirees who are not entrepreneurs.
Anon
We’re (kind of) joking about it right now, but my husband is getting more and more serious about this. And he works for the DoD, so he’s hardly anti-American.
Anon
Totally. And I didn’t think that way four years ago or when Bush was elected and re-elected. Doesn’t help that my state is also a giant dumpster fire.
Carmen Sandiego
Yes, but also this is something my husband and I are both interested in generally, politics aside. The biggest problem I see is getting a job in another country. I just can’t seem to wrap my head around what jobs are available for Americans living abroad (when you’re moving somewhere that you have no connections). As much as I would love to not work, I do need to have a job, unfortunately. I would love to hear anyone else’s experiences on this, or if anyone does relocate, I would be interested in following your journey!
Anon
The friends I know who have done this worked for large international employers and put themselves out as open for an overseas assignment. One friend worked in Munich, then Australia. Once in Australia, he changed companies to an Aus based company and never came back.
Two other friends took transfers to the London office. One came back to the states at the end of the four year commitment. She loved the expat life but didn’t think she would enjoy it as much as a resident. At that time the exchange rate was such that she made a lot more getting paid in USD than pounds. One transferred to Germany and is still working there, but with plans to come back eventually.
I’ve also had a quite few colleagues transfer to Asia but none of them stayed long term. In fact all but one of those I know ended their assignments early.
Anonymous
Depends what field. It’s pretty easy to get a health care job in Atlantic Canada and a work permit or even fast tracked for permanent residency as there is a high demand for doctors and other health professionals.
Carmen Sandiego
Sadly not in medical. I’m an attorney and I just feel like it’s so non-transferable.
Seventh Sister
Decades ago, I remember thinking pretty seriously about leaving the US to work abroad. Two things held me back: (1) I’m not great at foreign languages and (2) I genuinely felt like the US was the least sexist industrialized country at the time. Then I managed to pick a career (law) that isn’t really transferable to another country, and I just don’t think I have it in me to pack up and leave at this point in my life.
Frankly, I am encouraging my kids to consider leaving the US when they grow up. Salaries might be lower in other places, but having national health care and gun control are the kind of things I’d like them to have as adults. And as for taxes, my taxes have gone up thanks to Dear Leader because we’re not well-off enough to take advantage of the cuts he gave to much richer folks.
Anonymous
We left when he was elected the first time around. Zero regrets. I told my spouse the afternoon of 11/9/16 we were leaving. It took us 20 months to arrange it all, between permits, housing, and school for kids. So glad we did it before we had to do it. My friends now are all thinking about this but it is sooooo much harder now due to COVID. One of the biggest lessons I took from my families history in WWII is that you have to leave before you have to leave.
Senior Attorney
Wow you were smart.
Anon
Where did you go? How did you go? I always thought that unless you had unique circumstances (like family in another country) you can’t just pick up and move.
Anony
You can’t just pick up and move. We’re in one of the Nordic countries. Like I said it took 20 months to arrange this. It helps if you have a profession that is portable and in demand, which fortunately I do. Without that it’s next to impossible for a US resident to come over here and live. The only other path would be a student visa, which does allow you to bring your family, but you can’t work on those. If you do that you need to be able to prove support via financial assets.
We had traveled here before and really liked it, so that is how we ended up here. But again, it was by no means easy. Or cheap. But it was worth it.
pugsnbourbon
Man – good on you.
We’ve thought about leaving. Canada is the only realistic option and I know it’s challenging to immigrate there.
Anon
Maybe. My husband probably could relocate to Denmark if he wanted to and it would be a lot more attractive if Trump wins. The sticking point is my elderly parents. I’m not moving if they don’t, and I’m not sure they’re up for it. We are white and wealthy so I’m privileged to not be affected by discrimination or lack of Obamacare, but I don’t want to live in an authoritarian country and I’m not sure democracy would survive 4 more years.
Ellen
I once considered marrying a guy from Belgum but his family insisted that I live there and they are in farming country, so I could not do anything in the law over there. I think all I would be good for was making babies, and perhaps I might have done that, but I think I would have become very bored living on the family farm just sleeping with him and then churning butter all day. FOOEY!
Anon
Working on my dual citizenship (based on parentage) now. I plan to go if Trump is reelected because I have doubts about the long term viability of the country.
Little Red
Yeah, I read that article in WaPo too. My two closest friends are always joking that we will move to NZ and buy a Golden Girls house for our retirement but we might need to speed up our plans if Trump wins re-election. But I have elderly parents too who just finally downsized and moved up here to the wilds of NoVA to be near me and my sister. They’re at the stage where they need closer watching.
Anon
What article?
Little Red
https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/2020/08/27/covid-school-abroad/
Anonymous
No. I’m horrified by Trump but I’m not personally affected by any of his actions accept his denial of climate change, which is a global issue, and I think I can do more good for marginalized communities by staying here and fighting.
Anonymous
+1. How are those leaving personally affected? I’m unhappy with a lot of things and fear health options/education/sexism/racism will continue to get worse … but I hope I’m in an okay position to weather things for a while. If you’re planning on leaving, are there specific policies that affect you, or what is it that would tip the scale and make you say “I’m definitely leaving”?
Anony
I’m the person above who has already left. Our younger child won’t ever be in a position to hold a high-end professional job in the US. He loves where we live, is thriving here, and has no intention to ever leave. I sleep much better at night knowing that he can grow up to work with his hands and still have access to health care. That’s just one of the many reasons we left, but it’s a huge reason.
Anon
+2. What exactly do you think is going to happen that’s so awful you have to flee? I feel like my own life is much more affected by state and local government than by the federal government. I live in a solidly blue college town in a red state with fairly moderate Republican leadership (our governor has handled the pandemic better than some blue state governors) and I’m not sure what Trump getting to appoint a couple more conservative Justices is going to change as far as my own life goes. My life right now is pretty great, in fact, other than the pandemic, I would say it’s never been better – we have great jobs, are doing very well financially, have wonderful schools for our kids, a beautiful home, friends, a set of grandparents nearby, etc. We’ve spent the better part of a decade building this life and it would take a lot for me to leave all this behind and start over somewhere new.
I also think a lot of people are underestimating how hard it is to assimilate into a totally new culture where you know no one. Even Canada and the UK have major cultural differences from the US, and the culture shock would be much bigger in most other countries. Not to mention all the countries where English isn’t the native language. I love traveling, but I’m always SO ready to come home after a 1-2 week trip, and I just can’t see myself ever wanting to live abroad. Is it something I’d do if my life were in danger? Of course. But it’s not something I’d do just because I hate the president.
Anon @5:44
My own personal life is pretty great and being white, upper middle class, and living in a deep blue state means that I am relatively insulated. Having said that, if he wins it tells me that 50% or more of my fellow Americans have essentially abandoned the rule of law and democratic norms and we are starting the slide into authoritarianism and tribalism. It will not happen overnight but I am afraid it will happen. And I would rather my grandchildren grow up in a better country.
The electoral college and the red state/blue state split basically means that the most conservative and reactionary part of our country is running the show. And after Trump they will find another authoritarian, anti-democratic would-be dictator who thinks he is above the law to support.
I am not planning on giving up my US citizenship and maybe things will change. But I want a bolt hole if my family needs one and I am more concerned with my child and her maybe someday children that culture shock for myself.
Anonymous
This. It’s the disregard for the rule of law and democracy that bothers me. Pardoning Alice in exchange for her speech, Secretary of State breaking 40yrs of tradition, partisan nomination acceptance speech at White House, refusal to condemn domestic terror threat of QAnon, and that’s just the past couple days.
Little Red
I’m glad that your life is so good, comfortable, and safe that you don’t need to worry about Trump’s policies negatively affecting you. But for the rest of us, either because we are not white or because we are immigrants or whatever else, we don’t feel safe.
Anon
The majority of commenters on this s*te (including some people on this thread saying they’re leaving) are affluent white women. I understand that its a privilege to not be negatively impacted by Trump’s policies, but I’m not sure how rich white women fleeing the US helps those who are less privileged. If anything, isn’t it the opposite? By staying and continuing to vote, protest, etc., you are helping those who aren’t as privileged than you. If everyone who can afford to get out of the US does, then things will be even worse here.
Anonymous
I’d love to leave, but the reality is that it’s not actually possible even from my position of relative privilege.
Anon
You’re safe. It’s us Trump supporters who are literally being shot in the streets.
Anon
Yes – the problem is convincing my parents. We have enough money to buy our way into a couple of countries in Europe and I am trying to convince them to at least consider it. I feel like if Trump wins we are Germany 1933 and it is time to get out if you can.
And in any event my daughter (who is a college student now) is looking into graduate programs abroad.
Anonymous
We can’t really leave. Our plan is to hunker down in a small U.S. town, out of the chaos, and work remotely as much as possible for as long as possible.
Anonymous
I’ve had ex-pat assignments in Brazil (3 years) and London (2.5 years). Great experience, glad I did it, glad it’s over. I would have kissed the runway at JFK when I came back if they let me.
However, I encourage you to go full steam ahead at moving somewhere else. There are too many people in the US now, we sure do not need anyone that doesn’t want to be here.
LaurenB
Yes, we are seriously considering leaving the country if Trump wins.
anon
Yup, I will 100% start job searching in my home country if he gets reelected.
Anonymous
Canadian here. I heard an interview this morning with a rep from a company called Communitech. They are a support company to the tech industry and have an active campaign right now to attract Americans who want to move to Canada. I’m not sure what skill sets they are trying to attract, but may be worth a look if you are interested in the tech sector.
Anonymous
I just googled that and it’s not an actual company that is hiring employees for themselves, but appears to be a company that’s trying to position themselves as a recruiter for tech companies … it seems their ad campaign is kind of deceptive.
Anonymous
It also says Canada pays tech employees half of what the US does, so IDK who can afford it.
Anonymous
Canadian here again. Please don’t either of you come to Canada.
Brunette Elle Woods
I wish I could afford to leave. At least my family is relatively financially secure and in a dark blue state.
Alanna of Trebond
I really do not understand these comments. I am descended from immigrants (South Asian) and there is nowhere in the world that I would have the quality of life that I do in the US (in NYC) today, except maybe in parts of Canada. The racism against South Asians is much worse in any other western country (except Canada, I think) and the sexism is much worse in India (and many other countries). In Canada (and many other places), I would make an order of magnitude less money.
Anonymous
Yes but where??? I am retired, already a dual citizen and a bad linguist although I love traveling and working in different countries (and continents).
Anon
If you’re retired, I would think your best/only option would be the country where you have dual citizenship? Otherwise it’s hard to get in except through a work visa.
Anonymous
If you actually believe there is some place that is better to immigrate to, please go ahead and find out. This is just politics, not pre WWII Germany – though reading the NYTimes would have you believe otherwise. I’m a moderate Dem and don’t have any real concerns about Democracy even if Trump wins. It will all come back around eventually.
Though I suspect 99% of the people claiming they’ll leave are just full of hot air.
Sloan Sabbith
Walnut, thinking of you- if you’re looking for audiobooks that aren’t sad, let me know what you like and I’ll make recommendations!
Anon
I am also thinking of you, Walnut. Thanks to Sloan for posting this. I haven’t been able to keep my mind off you since you posted. Much love sent your way.
Walnut
Yes – I am going to email you. Thank you!!
anne-on
Niche design question – has anyone had a window seat cushion/daybed cushion custom designed? We found a cabinet maker to do the built in to fit our weird space, but now we need to have the cushion made. It is for my son’s room so he wants something fairly thick/cozy but I’m thinking in a sunbrella/performance fabric for wear (and to stand up to dog/cat).
Is this something to go to Etsy for? Do mainstream companies do this?
Anonymous
This is a Q for Facebook. Through friends, in my city, I found a great place to do custom pillows / cushions / drapes. Spendy. Almost too many fabric choices. Sunbrella is a good option the owner said. Still deciding on fabrics.
Unsub
I’ve done it a lot. I’ve generally coved the cushions I already owned, but I once started from scratch and choose a Sunbrella fabric. My local upholstery shop did a fantastic job. Apparently they do it all the time.
Go for it
An upholstery shop should be able to do this no problem
The original Scarlett
This is what Etsy is for – tons of options and makers on there (and I think easier because you don’t have to track anything down)
Anon
Serious and weight question:
What is the best grocery store strawberry ice cream?
Right now I think it’s Tillamook (may be a west coast thing) but I’m open to lots of experimentation.
Anon
*weighty
Anon
Idk if Strauss has a strawberry flavor, but I like all their other flavors.
Anon
I tried the Strauss last night. It’s good, but I’d give the edge to the Tillamook.
Anon
Blue Bell (NOT Blue Bunny) is universally awesome, though I don’t know if you can get it there.
And if you’re ever in New England, Gifford’s of Maine is SO GOOD.
Vicky Austin
Tillamook is a west coast thing, and I miss it SO MUCH.
anon
If you have Publix in your state, look for it there. We have Tillamook in North Carolina.
Vicky Austin
Alas, I am in the upper Midwest – no Publix either. But thank you for looking out for me! :)
Dear Summer
I’ve gotten Tillamook in the upper Midwest at Kroger
Gail the Goldfish
I saw some in my east coast grocery store last weekend, so it’s making its way east. Check their website, it has a map of places that carry it.
Editor
Tillamook has made it past the Mississippi at least. It’s the best mint chocolate chip!
Sal Goodman
I found Tillamook at the local Harris Teeter this morning in NC
Elegant Giraffe
We have it in dallas!!
Kitten
I’d throw Haagen Dazs into the mix but don’t know how it will stack up against Tillamook. I say buy one of each and do a blind taste taste.
For science ;)
Anon
I am all about science!!
anon
Not only should you do blind taste testing, but make sure to do replications!
Mal
Haagen Dazs IS awesome, but haven’t done any comparison shopping :)
Need a new name
Not Strawberry ice cream, but if you haven’t had the Tillamook Ice Cream sandwiches, they are AMAAAAZZZING!!!
Thankfully only 4 come in a box.
Anne-on
Not plain strawberry, but I do like Ben and Jerry’s strawberry cheesecake flavor!
Also, if you like berries, Jeni’s brambelberry crisp is amazing. Still looking for a good peach ice cream. That may just be one I have to accept I can only get in person, in season.
Anon
I’m way down the rabbit hole on this but Tillamook makes a “13.5% Peach” ice cream.
Philly
Bassets (very local in my area though). If not available, Hagen Dazs
Also strawberry is the best.
Anon
Cheesecake Factory makes ice cream now and their salted caramel cheesecake flavor is fantastic. They have a strawberry cheesecake flavor I would definitely try if I liked strawberry ice cream.
B&J FTW
Ben and Jerry’s strawberry cheesecake flavor! Not plain strawberry but it is soooo good…
H&M Jeans?
Can anyone comment on the quality and fit of H&M jeans? I am 5’2″ straight size and 40ish. The price is right but I have no experience with H&M.
Anonymous
Kids clothes runs big and adult clothes runs small.
Anon
I think the kids clothes run small!
Anonymous
Sadly, their American sizes these days are a joke. At 5’ 3 the last pair of pants I tried from there had knee darts that hit me at the ankles.
Anonymous
Seriously, I had to laugh at the idea that anyone would have femurs that long.
Anon
In my experience quality is middling and sizing is all over the place between different items.
The original Scarlett
I like them for the price – echoing that they run small, but the quality isn’t any different than gap/old navy. I like them for fashion jeans that aren’t a style I’d keep for ages.
Hollis
I am writing to give a shout out to the Rette who recommended Spenco slides for house slippers. For some reason, Birkenstocks don’t work on my feet and neither do Vionics, but these Spenco slides have saved me from heel pain and my ever-worsening bunions. They aren’t going to win me any fashion awards, but finally I can walk around my hardwood floors without heel pain and I paid less than $40 (way cheaper than custom orthotics) for these marvelous synthetic slippers I had never heard of before. Thank you!
The Midwest Is a Dumpster Fire
I used to be ashamed that I have not traveled in the Midwest much. But between the rampant racism, gun-toting, and absolute refusal to control the spread of the coronavirus, I am glad I have not invested my money there. I will not be visiting. Ever. Thankfully I am unlikely to have to travel for work for the foreseeable future. We have cases pending in Chicago and Minnesota but I am going to do everything to ensure we are operating remotely and not spending firm money (or MY money) there. I don’t think it will be hard to make the case given their absolute abdication of leadership on the pandemic.
Anonymous
Lol what!? We’re just now seeing the surge that the Northeast, South and California experienced months ago, and we seem to be flattening the curve before we get to NY or Arizona/Florida/California levels of overwhelmed hospitals. There is no part of the US that has handled this pandemic “well” but I’m perfectly satisfied with my state’s response compare to other US states. If you don’t want to visit because you’ve painted the entire region as racist and gun-toting, that’s your loss. You’re missing out.
anon
I’ve never been to a landlocked state and I’m not even remotely ashamed of that :)
LaurenB
Illinois has been one of the leaders in responses to the pandemic. We had strong leadership from Mayor Lightfoot and Governor Pritzker, we shut down early, had a very thoughtful phased re-opening which has since been modified to allow the governor to focus at a county by county level, very early mask mandate … Don’t confuse Chicago (or Minneapolis for that matter) with the rural Midwest (which I agree is a bunch of hicks). Most people here in Chicago do *not* have guns and it’s not part of the “culture” in the least, unless you’re up to no good. It’s just not all that different from Boston, NY, Phila, Balto, etc. in terms of culture.
Anonymous
Did you read the responses earlier in the week with people criticizing your use of the word “hicks”? They were very generous in trying to help you out. Maybe you should revisit that.
shark
My goodness you’re rude. I’m glad you’re so fancy and cultured compared to the rest of us Midwestern hicks. Your attitude is disgusting.
Monte
This is just so silly. You disdain Chicago and Minneapolis, but Miami and Dallas and Phoenix get a pass? Listen, I am a native New Yorker who thinks it is the center of the universe, but your take is just bad.
Anon
Since the last election, I have boycotted any state that went for Trump with respect to my travels. Even passing through, I have not spent a dime. It doesn’t mean much, but it’s a small protest.
Anon
flyover states, lol
Sorry to the Midwest
Look, I’m anon from 1:43 yesterday here to apologize. I do agree with Anonymous at 10:06 from today, who eloquently stated her point. But mostly, my comment was wrong, divisive, and tr0llish. I am sorry.
Anon at 1006
Kudos to you for apologizing. And thank you for reading my rant!
Wisconsin
I’ve lived all over the world (Europe and the Middle East), went to college on the East Coast, and I now reside in Wisconsin, just north of Kenosha (which you’ve likely seen on the news this week). My husband’s (white) family is from Kenosha. I have previously lived in Chicago and Washington, DC. My family is bi-cultural and biracial and my father is an immigrant. I say this to give some context to my perspective, which comes from a lot of angles.
I probably should not type this out to an internet stranger, but my God this kind of perspective is uneducated and shameful. Maybe you want to stay in your bubble, but no change will come if you refuse to meet/understand the other side. Also, to insinuate that there is nothing worth your time or money in certain locales is petty and rude and demeaning to the people who live there. I’m a progressive, but comments like these are exactly why people in “flyover country” (and elsewhere) don’t trust the East Coast elites.
I don’t know if there’s a single word that means “Gross generalization about a single category of people,” but if you were making similar blanket statements about Black people you’d be a racist. Think about it.
Anon
Yep, negative talk about so called flyover stares is what fuels this hatred.
anonchicago
Agreed. The initial comment and subsequent ones about not visiting flyover states are part of why Trump won.
anon
Lol sure Jan
Anon
Cosign all of this from Indiana, as a former resident of two deep blue coastal states. The anti-Midwest sentiment on this s1te is disgusting. Indianapolis is the most racially integrated city north of the Mason-Dixon line, which nobody on the coasts knows. You might see more Confederate flags in the countryside here than you would in a rural part of a coastal state, but racism exists everywhere. It may be a slightly “prettier” form of racism that is more palatable to upper crust WASPs, but I’d argue that’s worse because it’s less obvious and harder for those who care about fighting racism to call out. In terms of “real world” examples of racism (people being denied career opportunities or being turned away from high-end stores or restaurants because of their skin color), I witnessed far more of that in Boston and SF than I’ve ever seen here. So yeah. Your racism is more socially acceptable because you’re not “hicks” like us, but don’t kid yourself that you aren’t racist. You say “he just…doesn’t fit” and wink and smile at each other and call yourselves morally superior to the dumb racist Midwesterns and Southerners because you would never judge someone on their skin color. Suuuuuuure.
Anonymous
Can we stop pretending that racism exists outside of systemic power structure? I’m done with “reverse racism against white people.” I’m a New Yorker and the mid-west seems pretty to me. Heard about sunsets in Indiana in a country song and I bet they’re lovely. I’m sure there are liberals and conservatives in every little town in this country. I went to Chicago once and it’s the real deal.
However, the reality is, mid-westerners are not an oppressed minority. To the contrary, they hold national political power that is out of proportion to their numbers. And it’s not based on their financial or cultural contributions to this country, but rather from some pastoral ideal that dictates rural folks and their lifestyle are inherently more virtuous than of urban people and their lifestyle. That is, if you’re taking Jefferson at his word. If you’re reading between the lines, it’s based on racism, meaning the systematic oppression of a black folks in this nation, including the chattel slavery that was widespread and ongoing when these rules were made (centuries of human bondage and it’s aftermath, not like, it’s somehow “racist against whites ” to mock mid-westerners as people who think the Olive Garden is fancy.)
Anyway that’s my beef with the mid west, or rather, and a lot of red states generally. They hold up their values and lifestyle as the true America while mocking mine as exotic or elite. Meanwhile, on a state level they take more than they give, and maintain their way of life on the backs of us “elites” whose taxes end up in their states. Then they pick a president (yep, one of ours, but a guy we wouldn’t have elected dog catcher) who enacts policies that are harmful to our interests and way of life. Millions of New Yorkers and Californians’ votes simply don’t count, because a handful of people in the midwest disagreed and voted for an incompetent fool who made them feel “tough” and thousands of New Yorkers died. And mid-westerners act like WE’RE somehow oppressing them.
Anon
I don’t disagree with you about the unfairness of the Electoral College, but it’s a sweeping overstatement to say that Midwesterners get more say in elections. The Midwest has states that are solidly blue (eg., Illinois) and solidly red (eg., Indiana). Voters in those states have no more say in the election outcome than voters in deep blue coastal states. It just happens that in 2016 several swing states that decided the election were mostly in the Midwest although that hasn’t always been true – Florida decided the 2000 election and may well decide another election in the future. Arizona, Texas and Georgia are likely to become more purple within the next few years, and winning any of those means a Democratic presidential candidate can lose a bunch of Midwest states. And even in 2016, the biggest swing state was Pennsylvania, which is not in the Midwest. Is it unfair that if you live in Philadelphia your vote counts more than it does if you live in New York City? Yeah, I guess so, but it’s not evidence of the Midwest having a disproportionate amount of power.
Anonymous
Hi anon at 1:17,
I agree GA TX and AZ are going purpler, but voter suppression efforts by local and national forces will prevent them from going purple for real any time soon. Michigan and Wisconsin will matter for as long as we have elections, which might not be much longer precisely because of how they chose to vote in 2016. Perhaps my criticism of the system in general mischaracterizes the intent to give power to rural states as the intent to give it to Midwestern states specifically, but those two have a lot now.
I’ve alluded to the electoral college, but these comparatively small states also have an outsized voice in the senate. The way I see it, the an entire system is basically designed to have the will of the rural few control the urban many. And they use it to exploit and insult us and pretend they’re somehow victims. To your point, that is not unique to the Midwest, people in Alabama would say the same thing, but it’s characteristic of this attitude, indicated above, that people in Wisconsin and Michigan and Indiana are somehow victims and subject to something akin to racism, and that it lead to the result in 2016. It’s really this idea that gets to me most.
I’d also argue that, Pennsylvania is at least partially midwestern (five thirty eight often says this). Western Pennsylvania is culturally similar to Ohio, and they vote that way. Having lived in south central PA in college, I’d argue that there are few criticisms of any rural red state that couldn’t be applied to that area as well. So the way I see it, I don’t think the fact that Pennsylvania isn’t considered midwestern by midwesterners changes my frustration with their political power. To your point, the Philadelphian voter is in a unique spot as an almost-East coast city person whose vote counts as much as an almost mid-westerners’. The rest of us aren’t so lucky.
Anyway, than you for reading and considering lengthy rant on a Sunday afternoon. :)
Wisconsin
To Anon from 8/30 at 10:06: you are doing exactly what you accuse Midwesterners of doing: “hold up their values and lifestyle as the true America while mocking mine as exotic or elite.” You’re doing the same in reverse — mocking a lifestyle (which is nuanced and changing based on region; inner-city Milwaukee is vastly different from far northern Wisconsin).
What I’m trying to say is don’t generalize about an entire state/region full of people.
No one implied reverse racism and that was certainly not my intent when I wrote my comment above. Also, to assume everyone in the Midwest is white would completely ignore the people of color who live here.
Anon
Turn off the sensationalist 24 hour cycle news stations/websites that need a new story every hour. They need to fill the time and gain eyeballs somehow, and make everything more divided and amplified in order to do so. Actually visit what you are talking about to educate yourself.
Anonymous
I suppose I could plan a driving tour of Midwest sites of police shootings (and vigilante shootings) of Black people, but it would take weeks.
shark
Your loss. Your attitude is gross, so we won’t miss you here.
JB
Its too late for you to see this, but remember that in 2016 Hillary won both Minnesota and Illinois, where your cases are located. Moreover, those two cities are dark blue. You should be ashamed for not wanting to understand more about this country and judge entire populations based on where people reside.
Ear plugs
Weird recommendation request that I feel like has come up before- earplugs for sleeping.
My newborn that sleeps in our room is a noisy sleeper, and I’ve been sleeping in ear plugs the past few nights to help sleep through the grunts and squawks (not the cries for food. I can still hear and respond to those).
I have some cheap foam ear plugs I ended up with somewhere along the way that work fine in terms of blocking out just enough noise, but they hurt my ears after a few hours.
So I’m searching for some noise dampening ear plugs that are comfortable for sleeping. Nothing too expensive since he will be moving to a crib in his own room a few months and my husband is luckily not a snorer (yet).
The original Scarlett
I buy a big box of extra soft foam ones and they last for ages, and are really comfortable (I have fussy ears and a snoring spouse) – this is what I last got, out of stock now but you might be able to track down or find similar
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B075C4NHKL/
Anon
I am a light sleeper and sleep with ear plugs every night. I have tried what feels like all of them. The silicone ones are most comfortable for me. My husband uses foam, but cuts them down so that they fit in his small ears better. I do think it’s a matter of trial and error. If you’re worried about missing noises from your baby and you are a side sleeper, you can use just one on the ear that’s facing up. Also, consider a white noise machine. That might be enough to drown out the baby’s grunts but leave you still able to hear him or her.
Anonyz
Search musician’s websites, that will give you more specialized options. Some even block specific wavelengths.
Elegant Giraffe
I guess I have really small ear canals or something but the only ones that don’t hurt are “sleep pretty in pink” foam plugs. I feel silly buying such a gendered product but they’re slimmer or something. And then I cut them down even more with scissors. I wear a pair for two weeks, then discard.
Anon
I’ve used these with decent success, and they are definitely the most comfortable. They may be the silicon ones someone above is referring to too
https://www.amazon.com/Sleeping-Cancelling-Reduction-Airplanes-Musicians/dp/B07WCK3HHW/ref=lp_3779871_1_2_s_it?s=hpc&ie=UTF8&qid=1598800926&sr=1-2-spons&psc=1&spLa=ZW5jcnlwdGVkUXVhbGlmaWVyPUExRzNBUTQxOURaWDJDJmVuY3J5cHRlZElkPUEwOTQ1MTYwMjhXN1BHSDZLN1pMTCZlbmNyeXB0ZWRBZElkPUEwNjAwMTEzMzFQMks5VFZGTVNXOCZ3aWRnZXROYW1lPXNwX2F0Zl9icm93c2UmYWN0aW9uPWNsaWNrUmVkaXJlY3QmZG9Ob3RMb2dDbGljaz10cnVl
Seventh Sister
Can I suggest a slightly different tack? My eldest was the world’s loudest sleeper, and my husband is a very light sleeper. It was so.much.better when we had her sleep in her own crib in her own room. I was nursing and he’d wake me up constantly, insisting that every sigh or tiny fuss was a hunger cry. I know there are approximately 700234325 parenting experts who think infant in the same room is the one true way, but our pediatrician was fine with this approach. We did use a baby monitor and heard actual cries just fine.
Ms B
Cosign. We had every intention of having The Kid sleep in our room for the first six months, but there was So. Much. Noise. Especially when The Kid figured out how to turn 90 degrees in the cradle and bump into the spindles half the night. We moved him to a crib in his room at seven weeks and that was much more tolerable.
Anon
Just picked up Who Says It’s a Man’s World: A Girl’s Guide to Corporate Domination by Emily Bennington from a $3 Bin. It’s not recent – was published in 2013. Has anyone read it?
Cat
No, but that title is so very 2013 it hurts.
Reverse Vampire
This is super late so I’ll probably end up reposting this on tomorrow’s article but…
Has anyone here had bloodwork done by sites like Personalabs, where you can choose what tests you want and then have the results sent back to you? I was recently diagnosed with endometriosis, which tends to correlate with high estrogen levels, progesterone resistance, and other hormonal imbalances, so I figure knowing exactly how out of line those are would be useful for now and later if anything starts to rise. Anyone had experiences in this direction? Places you’d recommend? Places you’d avoid? Thanks!