Frugal Friday’s TPS Report: Pipelle Silk Blouse

Our daily TPS reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices.

Antonio Melani Pipelle Silk BlouseHooray for the long weekend ahead! For today’s TPS, I’m loving this bright yellow silk blouse on deep discount at Dillard’s. The ruching, the sleeves, the woven silk — no wonder there are only lucky sizes left. It was $109, but is now marked to $38.15. Antonio Melani Pipelle Silk Blouse

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Comments

  1. Thank goodness this isn’t in my size. I was already reaching for my credit card despite the fact August was filled with too many clothing purchases. I’m a sucker for anything yellow…

  2. Love the yellow!

  3. momentsofabsurdity :

    Love it. I just bought a yellow cardigan – I know it’s fall but I love yellow!

  4. Brooklyn, Esq. :

    Love the style of this top but not the color.

    Ok, wedding etiquette threadjack: going to a wedding in Nov. My husband is working on a case that has a major filing 3 days after this wedding, and his fellow associates have told him he probably won’t be able to leave the office the weekend of the wedding. But then again we can’t be sure, and probably won’t know until the day of. This wedding is in Brooklyn so it’s easy for us to get there. I will go to the wedding myself, of course, but what to do about the RSVP? I just got married myself so I know getting an accurate headcount is essential and totally stressful. Here are the options I am contemplating:

    1. Emailing the bride, telling her what’s going on, and asking what to do (e.g., could my husband come for post-dinner dancing/partying or something); OR
    2. RSVPing just for myself and dealing with the fact that my husband won’t be able to come (this is the “not dumping this decision in the bride’s lap when she’s got tons of other stuff to deal with” option, but also the “less fun for me” option).

    Other possibly relevant info: the couple getting married are equally my friends and my husband’s friends; they came to our wedding; they are friends but not the closest of friends.

    Thoughts?

    • Would it be possible for your husband to miss the ceremony but come for dinner and dancing? I have been to a couple of weddings where someone had to work and missed the ceremony but was able to come towards the end of cocktail hour.

    • I’d rsvp just for myself. If your husband is able to attend, he can still come for post meal dancing, or he can probably just come since there will likely be other attendees who rsvp’d “yes” but then just dropped out at the last minute. The venue should be able to accomodate anywhere from 1-20 extra guests. If you rsvp for two, and he cannot come, the bride may be charged for his meal.

    • This is easy… Get the case posponed! I do it all the time!

      Dont bother with the plainetiff. Just go talk to the judge, and tell him about the wedding you are goeing to and it won’t realy matter b/c the judge has alot of other case’s, so he is NOT waiteing for you to keep him busy.

      I have posponed at least 30 cases this way! I wish all probelem’s were this easy to solve. When I am a judge, I will allow this if peeple ask for a posponement. Yay!

    • Is it a Satuday wedding? So probably likely that by Saturday night everyone wants a break and he can come anyways. Chances are she doesn’t have to have a payment headcount until 2 weeks or so before hand. I would RSVP for 2, tell her that there is a chance it is just 1 and update her as needed.

    • Ask the bride. Just say you’re definately in, you won’t know until the last minute if DH can come. You know what a PITA the guest list is, how would it work best for her?

      You could always RSVP for two, and bring a friend along if DH can’t come (obv talk to the bride first) so you have someone to hang with.

    • I’d email her with the situation and ask advice. I appreciate you not wanting to dump problems on her, but if it were my wedding, I’d like to be flexible enough to include husband if possible. Depending on when her headcount is due, your husband may be able to sub in at the last minute. Of course, I’m someone who does well knowing all the details like that.

    • just Karen :

      As someone who got married four months ago, I say absolutely RSVP for just one, with a note on the card that says DH hopes to join for dinner and dancing. I paid for a LOT of dinners for people who rsvp-ed but didn’t show, and have lingering resentment towards a few of them (who no-showed, and never bothered to say anything about it or apologize – I know it’s time to get over it, but I’m not there yet).

      • Brooklyn, Esq. :

        Thanks for the perspective, everyone! I’m going to email her.

      • @just Karen – I’m right there with you! I had several people RSVP and then not show up, including a friend of my mother’s who RSVPed for the couple and their 2 children and the children’s significant others. Only 2 of the 6 showed up, with no mention of the others. It’s almost 2 years later and I’ve yet to get an apology or even an acknowledgement that they weren’t there. I know I have to let it go, but it still bothers me. I spent over a $1000 on people who didn’t bother to come.

        I think you should RSVP for one and then ask the bride what she would like you to do if your husband is able to come. Please do not RSVP for both of you if there is a chance your husband can’t come.

        • I was in the same situation too. I even under-estimated figuring a few would cancel but it still ended up costing at least $1,000 in no-shows (with no explanation afterwards!)

        • I think it is perfectly understandable that things come up and people cannot make it to the wedding. However, they should send a gift or at the very least apologize!

    • If the couple is creating a seating chart to ensure that people will have lots of fun with people around them, a “maybe” or a last minute change would be super annoying. However, depending on the venue, having an extra person just come for dancing would likely be easy-peasy.

  5. Yay!!!! Fruegel Friday’s!!!! And weekend comeing up!!!!!! Yay!!!!!!

    I love this blouse to, but it is ONLY availeable in Large! FOOEY! I do NOT want to have to grow bigger in order to fit it. DOUBEL FOOEY!

    The sloppy teck guy just came back AGAIN to fix my machiene–it did NOT work right yesterday. He told me I must have done something to it AND I was way to cute to be a lawyer. I told him to fix the machine. I also said I was the same person even before I became a lawyer, and he did NOT understand what I said. He might know computer’s, or NOT, but he does NOT understand me at all. Fooey!

    In the meanetime, I am STILL busy useing my own Apple MacAirbook, but I am STILL NOT abel to bill for August!!!!! The manageing partner should give me a subesidy for useing my own laptop, and the manageing partner also said I could come in tomorow to finish my billeing. Fooey! I told him tomorow was the WEEK END and I had plan’s to drive again with Myrna out to Jone’s Beach. She want’s to meet those Long Island guy’s so I said fine but at least I wont RUN into Jim there! Yay!!!!!

    • Just want to say I love Ellen’s idea that since there is only large shed have to gain weight in order to fit it. Instead of say, tailoring

    • Francie Nolan :

      Ellen I would love to meet you and Myrna for lunch at the Pastrami King near Jones Beach if you have the time let me know.

      • And I am still trying to invite Ellen to my weddeing. Let me know if she ever gives up her contact info! It would mean a lot to me to have her there, and she could get another case postponement out of it…

  6. Still no power yet. It’s exhausting. It was too hot to sleep. I feel so tired and grubby. Can’t wait to get the power back on!

    • Cornellian :

      Ugh, grubby. The only 3+ days of no power I’ve experienced were all as a prepubsecent child, which I am thankful for. I don’t think kids ever feel grubby.

      Glad you’ve come through on the other side, though!

    • Fingers crossed today’s the day!

      • In the Pink :

        Thinking of you. Praying the second day’s the charm!

        When the stores restock, get 1 or 2 battery powered fans…a lifesaver when grubby strikes.

  7. Good thing its a color I don’t like, because I do love Antoni Melani.

  8. Egh. Ran out of face moisturizer this morning so I put on a tester I got this month in my Glymm box (Canadian birchbox). Not only has it developed a smell I only just realized is unnervingly similar to fake tan lotion (given that every single brand I’ve tried gives me a horrible itchy rash) but its now starting to flake off my face and neck in the way a really thick sunblock might. Trying not to touch as that seems to exacerbate it, but Really! Can’t remember the name but it was in a small white tube. YMMV but just a friendly warning…

  9. Question re Winter :

    Hello ladies,

    I have a question about work wardrobes in the winter. I just moved from LA to Denver, and am told about this phenomenon called “snow” and “ice”, which I have not experienced before on a daily basis! My work wardrobe from LA consists of mostly long slacks with high heels (3-4″), and light jackets. I don’t own any flats, very few low heels, and few pants that are short enough for flats. I also have only about 2 skirts total and never wear them.

    At my new job, I will have to walk around outside between buildings occasionally (not a lot), but that means I can’t just arrive at work in huge rubber boots and change into my 4″ heels for the day. I have to be ready to cross an icy parking lot during the day.

    I assume I need some boots — any recommendations? (I’ll note I have wide calfs) And can I find snow/ice-worthy boots with a 3″ heel, or do I need to buy an entire new set of winter pants with a shorter hem? Are skirts really the only option — I have body image issues with showing my legs (even in tights) and much prefer pants when possible.

    Thanks, and happy Friday!

    • Look at La Candienne boots. They are nice looking and actually made for dealing with snow. Those Canadians know something about cold weather!

    • When it is snowy enough for you to be concerned about walking safely across a parking lot, it will be far too cold for a skirt/tights.

      • Personally I find a thick tweed skirt and tall boots to be much warmer than pants.

        • Agreed. Knee-high boots, tights, and a knee-length skirt are much warmer than pants for me, too. I also like not having to worry about my pants dragging in larger piles of snow (or gross sand/snow mixtures). Also, if you’ve lived in a place where you would say “it’s warm enough to snow,” you know that walking through snow doesn’t necessarily mean super cold.

          • Cornellian :

            “it’s warming up out there!” “Well, crap, get the shovels out!”

          • Ugh. Even thinking of “too cold for snow” depresses me right now. I’m so looking forward to what appears to be the last beach weekend up here!

          • Enjoy the beach while you can! I just spent my first full year in DC, and I didn’t find myself craving a tropical vacation at all this year.

          • Yes! Also, if you know what “cornstarch” snow means.

        • Same. Especially when paired with fleece lined tights.

          • Yes, fleece lined tights are amazing.

            @Question re winter: I grew up in LA and now live in the Midwest. I dont have any fantastic boot recs but here are some others:
            a) Wear fleece lined tights with skirts or pants. They are so warm and soft. They look like regular tights so they are work appropriate.
            b) buy your first coat with a friend from the area or a personal shopper. You probably have no idea what is a good coat or a bad one. I certainly had no idea.
            c) wear wool socks when you don’t want to wear tights.

      • eh – it can be 35 degrees out and you’ll have slush, mushy snow that is starting to melt (and you’ll totally want to wear boots), but I would still wear a skirt in that weather. If the boot/sock combo you have are warm enough (not just a thin leather), you could be fine in a skirt into the 20s even.

    • I live in NYS where we have much harsher winters than Denver. I live in pants exclusively in the winter, with the very occasional skirt and boots day. You definitely don’t need to switch to skirts, especially if you don’t like them.

      I don’t wear heels often in the winter, but I could see you getting by with wedge-heeled boots if it’s not icy. In my area it’s much more likely to snow than ice over, so the ground really isn’t all that slippery. Since Denver is warmer, I wouldn’t be surprised to find out that ice is more common.

      I would try to find wedge boots with good rubber tread, and I would hem some of your heavier pants shorter. You can also buy a few new pairs of wool or tweed winter-specific pants. If you haven’t experienced salt crusting up the back of your pants leg because the hem drags on the ground, well, that’s something you’ll want to avoid.

      • As another upstate NYer-agree 100%!

      • I find chunky heels are more comfortable than flats in the winter because they give me the feeling (possibly illusory) of being more stable on ice. Maybe because they dig in more. Any shoes or boots you get must have rubber soles though, for the ice.

      • I live in Denver now, and did live in New England before. We actually get much less ice on sidewalks and streets than was in NE. The sun makes snow disappear quickly. Loverly.

    • emcsquared :

      I have an awesome pair of insulated dressy black boots with a high heel (not sure it’s 3 inches, but it’s at least 2.5). Some shoe tricks:
      (1) rubber soles are a must if you’re wearing them outside in the snow; leather soles will disintegrate from the water and salt, and often don’t have enough grip to help you stay upright
      (2) I prefer chunkier heels if I have to walk outside on ice – it’s too easy to catch a skinny heel in a crack or pit in the ice and twist your ankle
      (3) I’m sure some people will suggest wedges, but I find I have less “feel” for my footing and am more likely to end up on slippery ice
      (4) the best way to walk on ice is to sort of slide your feet, instead of picking them up and putting them directly back down; that way if one foot slides out from under you, the other foot is likely on the ground so you are less likely to fall

      I try to wear flats with textured soles when I’m outside in winter, but it sounds like you would prefer not do that. I’d probably keep my “favorite” shoes as inside shoes, and get a couple of pairs of boots or heels with chunky heels, rubber soles and synthetic outers (because ice and salt eat leather and suede) for outside walking.

      And for pants – consider getting them hemmed a bit shorter. But a quick trek across a parking lot likely won’t leave your pants that wet (although I’d probably try to tuck the back of my pants leg under my foot in my shoe if it was just a quick walk).

      • Ok so basically emcsquared said everything I’d say!

        I’ll add, wear wool socks in your regular shoes. It took far too long for that epiphany to strike me, but trust me, it made the difference from my freezing feet making me miserable. And/or get boots with fleece/wool or whatever inserts, those are great too. Seriously, there is nothing more miserable than cold feet and freezing toes.

    • Very interested to hear the answer to this too. I have worked one winter in Toronto now and we’re lucky enough to have the underground Path system but there are still situations where this isn’t an option. Also from a snow-free climate so am never sure if I’m just overthinking the whole winter gear etiquette thing or look like an idiot because I’m missing something that’s obvious to the locals.

    • You can still wear slacks and heels, you’re just going to need to change your shoe wardrobe a bit. You should have “real” boots for going out in snow and ice, but if you’re just walking across a parking lot, you don’t need boots made for the Arctic tundra. You should be fine if you wear shoes that just don’ t have a really skinny, fragile looking heel. I live in a snowy, icy place too, and wear a lot of stacked loafers in the winter — the chunky heel (even if it’s a 3 inch heel) makes it solid enough to walk on. I don’t wear them to commute in, but find them to be fine if I run out of the office during the day to go get lunch or do errands.

    • You may find boots with a 3-inch wedge (La Canadienne Karol for example) but really, aesthetics take the back seat when you have to walk on ice. In the same vein, buying new pants is certainly lesser PITA and expense than an injury from walking in ice/snow in heels.
      Knowing that you prefer to wear pants, have you considered a midi skirt + tall boots look? It’s comfortable, warm, and keeps the legs hidden, but still attractive on most body types.

    • All good advice here. I think rubber soles and a decent-sized heel (not stiletto) are key. Ankle boots are nice for pants because they’ll keep your feet warmer/drier and fit under the pants (or you scrunch skinny pants over them, not sure how this works, I am too old and uncool to get this look effortlessly). Clarks makes nice boots that usually have rubber soles and can be quite warm, and they have styles that I think are office-appropriate.

      Another thing I’d suggest is wool socks. This will be a bit gross, but I found that wool socks simultaneously keep your feet warm and keep them from getting too sweaty – sweating actually will make your feet feel colder. I got a couple of pairs of Smart Wool socks (from Athleta I think, although lots of places sell them) last winter and I love them.

      And, when you are walking on slippery snow or ice, remember to take small steps. You need to keep your feet under you, so avoid long strides. I find walking sort of like a penguin helps on really slippery surfaces.

      Hope you like skiing! Colorado has excellent skiing!

    • Yay! Another Denver ‘rette. Don’t have much more to add because you’ve already gotten some awesome recommendations, but just wanted to say welcome.

    • Question re Winter :

      Thanks everyone, I’m going to look into all of these recommendations! And yes, I do ski, in fact! I love to ski, and I’m looking forward to trying out the local resorts. I am familiar with visiting snow in the winter — it’s the daily living with it that I’ve never done. Next I should ask for driving tips too….

      • Leave a lot of space between cars, steer into the skid, don’t slam on your brakes. And if it’s really awful, don’t try to be studly and drive, be safe and stay home (if you can).

        • This and is you are in hilly country, stop on top of the hill and make sure the car in front of you clears the next one so you don’t get stuck at the bottom of the hill…

          • Driving on SNOW isn’t that bad, it’s when it gets packed into ice that it gets tricky.
            Remember that you are essentially driving a big sled, and so is everyone else.

          • Or go sliding into the car at the bottom of the hill because you’ve hit an ice patch (why, no, I don’t know from experience — why do you ask?)

        • Oh, and keep a bag of cheap-o kitty litter (not the fine clumping kind, the kind that looks like gravel or cement) in your trunk. It works great for traction. I once rescued 2 cars stuck on a particularly steep, snow-covered driveway, by sprinkling kitty litter under their tires so they could get enough traction to get out. You could use salt, too, but I find a small bag of kitty litter easier.

      • I’m from Colorado and my number one safe driving tip for snow and ice, is don’t let other people zooming around, driving unsafely, influence you to drive that way too. Drive as slowly as you need to to feel safe, and if other people are annoyed just let them be annoyed. It’s better than getting in an accident. As bonus, sometimes you will be inching along the interestate at 25mph and someone will blow by you, honking, and then a little way down the road you will see them again in the ditch.

        • I’m also from Colorado and I agree with this. The hardest part about driving in the snow around Denver is that so many people don’t know how to do so safely. It’s definitely it’s own sort of defensive driving (leave plenty of space, avoid braking suddenly, if you lose control turn into the spin, etc.).

          The nice thing about Colorado is that the snow and ice are not permanent (it’ll snow one day and be sunny the next and everything melts!). Good luck and enjoy :)

      • If you car gets snow on it, clean the snow off the car completely. Clear ALL the windows, clear the snow off of the roof, the hood, the trunk, rear-view mirrors, and the headlights and brakelights. This snow WILL blow off into your line of sight (which can potentially blind you) or slide off in a big icy chunk on the car behind you. And I would drive with headlights on all the time, not just during the night. But I do that regardless of the weather.

        Don’t just clear a little part of your windshield so you can see out. That’s a recipe for danger. Don’t idle your car for more than 5 minutes to “warm it up”. Your car will warm up faster if you are actually driving it. I recommend turning the car on, turning on the defroster, and then getting out and clearing any snow – and then get back in and drive where I need to go.

        Don’t drive in deep snow (like more than the clearance for the bottom of your car). Don’t let having all-wheel drive fool you into thinking you can handle more than you can. Even if you have AWD, drive like you don’t.

  10. I looooooooooove this. But I am on a shopping ban for the next four weeks and must be strong. SIGH.

  11. I have a sad threadjack – I just found out this week that my friend’s baby (he’ll be 1 at the end of September) has been very sick, in the PICU for nearly 2 months. He’s recovering, but will need to spend some time in a rehab facility to get off the ventilator and learn to eat and sit up again. I feel like I want to do something but have no idea what. My friend has family in town to help, and she and her husband will be staying with the baby at a Ronald McDonald House associated with the facility. I was thinking maybe a gift card to a restaurant nearby? I don’t know if this would be appropriate, because probably they want to spend all the time they can with their baby, but maybe they might like a night off once in a while?

    Only other thing I can think of is throwing all my extra cash in the Ronald McDonald House collection bins next time I’m at McDonald’s.

    • momentsofabsurdity :

      How about a gift card to Seamless (or a similar food delivery service in their area)? That way they can eat at the hospital if they want, or take it back to the house and if the gift card is enough that they can splurge on a “nicer” place, all the better.

    • just Karen :

      I think a gift card to a restaurant nearby would be great – they can always get a nice meal to go if they don’t feel they can spend the time on a night out.

    • Do you know her family at all? Could you send them a gift card for a grocery store that has prepared foods and ask the family to pick up some prepared meals and take to them at RMH? Or call the RMH, explain that you have friends staying there and ask what kind of things guests there appreciate as gifts or if there are any restaurants close to the RMH

    • Thanks for your responses. I don’t know what I will do yet, but wanted to see if I was totally off track. I think I’ll check out the RMcD website and see if there’s any info about food delivery there, and check out a couple of restaurants I know of in the area (Baltimore, if anyone has any ideas) to see if they do take out.

      I’m hesitant for the Seamless idea (although I think it’s a good one, I like the choice aspect) unless anyone here has had experience with this in Baltimore, because when I tried to use it in Silver Spring my only options were a couple of crappy Chinese restaurants. I kind of live in a delivery dead zone, which is weird because I don’t really live in a remote area.

      • After reading their website, you could give them some basic necessities like laundry detergent or maybe a gift card to a wash and fold place nearby, maybe a nice pair of sheets/towels, slippers (I don’t like to walk around random places totally barefoot), a case of bottled water, and maybe some healthy snacks.

      • I’ve worked in that area in Baltimore, and there aren’t a lot of good food options (at least I didn’t think so). Its also not in a place that I love to be at night, if I remember the location right. If something can deliver from further away, that might be worth it. Otherwise, its also hard to get to a grocery store from there, so if you or some family members could pick up some groceries/prepared foods I think that would be a lovely idea so that they could eat in.

        • Yeah, the only place I can think of in Baltimore is Pazo, which is good but maybe too festive for something like this. They have cars and I think a family member is also staying with them at RMH, so getting around shouldn’t be a problem.

          I took some classes at the JHU School of Public Health, which I think is in that general vicinity? So yeah, not a great eating area. I suppose I could get them Burger King gift cards!

          Kidding, kidding. Will have to do some restaurant research if I go with that option.

    • I’m so sorry. Could you possibly call the hospital or the Ronald McDonald House they’re staying at and ask what helpful things families often need? They might be able to give you an idea for things to make it feel more homey. The gift card for dinner is a great idea.

      • This. I’m sure there’s something that no one ever realizes they need until they’re in the situation. RMH will know exactly what that thing is (and can identify if anything would actually be very un-helpful even if well-intentioned).

    • A dear friend of mine had a very sick baby and were in the same, prolonged hospital stay type, situation. They didn’t know if she was going to recover. Their first wedding anniversary arrived while the baby was still in the hospital and my friend’s parents came to sit with the baby, gave my friend and her husband money and told them they had reservations for dinner. My friend told me that she and her husband went to dinner that night and came back, sure that they could face any struggle in the world together and that they didn’t even realize how desperately they needed time alone together, out of the hospital. I think a restaurant gift card would be the perfect gesture.

      • This is so sweet.

        Thanks again, everyone, for your advice. I have googled up the RMH they’ll be at (I guess I should first make sure they are there, I think they’re supposed to move in about a week) and have a contact email. But I think I need to not do this at work because it’s making me cry.

        Seriously, how does someone go from having a perfectly healthy 9-month old to having him in the PICU, on a ventilator, and so very very sick? I don’t really know what happened, my friend said something about a bad virus. I’m like, what, Ebola?? It’s so frightening. And he’s such a cute, appealing little guy – I’m not really a baby person, but this one made an impression on me. Total propaganda baby.

    • The RMH houses that I have volunteered with generally have organizations come in every night to prepare dinners for the families staying there, plus people drop off baked goods, breakfast items, etc. Families can keep their own food in a fridge if they want, but generally there is not a shortage of food around the house.

      A gift card to a nearby restaurant would be a nice thing if they want to get out or order in. Maybe some magazines/iTunes gift cards/word searches for the down time at the rehab unit.

    • layered bob :

      when my parents last stayed in a Ronald McDonald House, they were responsible for their own cleaning and laundry, especially when they left – I know it was always very stressful for my mom to know that she would have to clean *that* house before going home to her own (probably messy) house. I don’t know if that policy has changed, but some kind of cleaning/laundry service (either for the RMH or for their own house) would probably help remove some stressors.

    • Blonde Lawyer :

      I think a donation to RMH would also be great. You could send her a card letting her know you are thinking of them and made a donation.

      • The local RMHs are each in charge of their own fundraising and only get a small % of their operating budget from the national organization, so you might want to send a donation directly to the RMH in Baltimore, as opposed to RMH headquarters.

  12. 2/3 attorney :

    Well, finally made it to DC! And I am dying. How in the heck to you DC ladies handle the humidity? I have to walk about a half mile from the nearest metro to the office, and by the time I get there I am a melty puddle of sweat. I already stopped blow drying my hair in the morning and started bringing face wipes in my purse.

    Yes, I know there are a thousand articles on the web about humidity hair and humidity makeup and whatnot. I am specifically wondering how you east coasters handle it on your morning commute and still look professional, at least when you get there. Any tips would be so greatly appreciated!

    • Welcome! It has been relatively cool the past few weeks, so you are in for some fun. September is still disgusting, but fall is beautiful. Pull your hair back before you leave and make sure it’s off your neck. Walk quickly, but not too quick so you don’t break a sweat. Try to figure out if you can walk past places that have AC to get a cooling breeze. If you’re at Union Station, try getting there about 15 minutes early and drinking someone water/hanging out in the AC. I’m also a big fan of putting on my face in the bathroom in my building. Also, primer is a must. Finally, if you have a big meeting, I am a complete fan of taking a cab from metro to work even if its ridic short. It is hard to look good when you live in a swamp!

      • I have to admit I chuckled a bit when I read your response to the OP, because yeah, it hasn’t really been that bad the last couple of weeks.

        DC summers are disgusting and I am so grateful that I drive to work instead of dealing with the metro. Oh, and in the summer, if you see a metro car that is mostly empty – don’t get in it, it probably has busted AC. It is also perfectly acceptable, and in fact recommended, to switch cars at the next stop if you do end up in a hot car.

        So I have no advice beyond what others here have said. My family lives in Chicago and Seattle and I’ve basically forbidden them from visiting me any time after Memorial Day and before, say, late September because I know they will not be able to deal. I barely can myself after 15 year here.

        • Yes. If your car’s AC is broken, get off at the next stop, and try another car. And, even though they say “No food or drinks,” I brought bottled water all summer. Sometimes it makes it more bearable.

          I try to figure out the shadiest way to get from Point A to Point B, sometimes its worth the longer walk to stay on the shady side of the street or take the path with more trees.

          I have nothing about the humidity. I just get all frizzy and that is life, I suppose.

          • oh my gosh I hate that attitude though. Even though they say “no food or drinks” I would drink because I figured they didn’t mean me. Whenever I see people drinking their ice coffe on the metro in front of the sign I’m like what world are you from where rules are made for other people.

          • I’m pretty much an everyone-must-follow-the-rules person, too, but I think a bottle of water in the summer is reasonable and isn’t going to cause the problems that coffee or food would.

          • Anon, the Metro has the most ridiculously stringent anti-food/drink rules of any subway system I have ever been on. I can understand not wanting people to eat some Ben’s Chili Bowl while rattling through the Federal Triangle–but seriously, there is no reason why passengers shouldn’t be able to drink a beverage from a lidded, travel-appropriate container. I’m all for respecting rules (good Metro examples: stand right/walk left, allow passengers to exit before entering the car, etc.), but some rules are just stupid.

          • I don’t think a bottle of water is what they mean by no food or drinks. I am a rules person, too, and I would argue that one if someone said something (including Metro police).

          • I am a total rule follower except when it comes to speeding and having a bottle of water on the metro. The rules are there so the cars don’t get trashed. I keep my bottle in my purse and if it’s disposable, I dispose of it properly and not on the floor of the metro.

          • I think they actually allow water on really hot days.

          • They do sometimes lift the “water ban,” but not often enough for me. The heat/humidity/total failure of metro AC really aggravates my motion sickness. Frankly, even without motion sickness, I’ve been on cars hot enough that I felt like I was going to pass out just from heat. After a few days of that I decided that the “consequences” of a bottle of water are a million times better than either getting sick on the train or passing out. It’s totally unreasonable to ask me to sit/stand on a crowded, 90 degree train for 45 or more minutes without any way to cool off or hydrate. I never bring coffee. I will admit to sometimes eating saltines for the same motion-sickness reasons, but promise I am incredibly clean about it and try to be discrete. Condemn me if you must, but at least I’m not delaying all the trains for 20 minutes for a “medical emergency.”

          • Gail the Goldfish :

            A friend and I were once waiting on the platform after a DC United game and she took a sip of her bottled water. It was like the middle of July. It was hot. A cop told her to throw it out or put the water bottle away. That was a couple of years ago, so I’m hoping they’ve loosened up, because that was totally unreasonable.

      • Wear only cotton underwear and blouses. It is tough enough attracting a guy in DC, and you want to do everything in your power to stay fresh in its unforgiving humid climate.

    • long-time lurker :

      I have wavy hair that is shoulder length. I wear it up in a high ponytail for my commute and spritz some hairspray around the crown of my head. When I get to work I take it down, finger comb into place. I can’t wear the ponytail too long or I get a bump at the back of my head, but it does give my hair some (controlled) body and keeps it frizz free in the a.m. A headband could also work.

      I do most of my makeup in the a.m. pre-commute, but found mascara best applied post commute because I end up raccoon eyed at 10 a.m. otherwise. I just keep it in my purse.

      I fold up suit jackets and carry in a plastic bag in my tote, and just wear a tank shell for the commute. Pants are too hot in summer so I avoid.

    • oooo honey its not even humid..you are in for it

      • True dat. Welcome!

        Hydrate, wear the right fabrics, wear deodorant, and second the recco for primer. Try to schedule your hours (if you can) for cooler parts of the day.

        Also, humidity is good for your pores – ha!

        • What kind of primer are you talking about? I have tried the oil-controlling kind, and they just flake off my face :/

          • I use Laura Mercier’s and it does help if I don’t use it directly after moisturizer. I also use two faced shadow primer (thanks to a rec from some fabulous ‘r e t t e) to keep my shadow from creasing. Heard good things about Nars too. I used to love my MAC prep and prime, but not enough in the summer. You can always do a trial on the weekend at Sephora.

            The trick for me was letting it actually fully dry before applying any foundation.

    • Walk slowly. Leave yourself extra time so you won’t feel like you have to rush. There’s no shame in being the one that gets passed on the sidewalk if you stay a little more comfortable.

      Is there an Au Bon Pain or something on your way from the Metro to the office? I would suggest stopping in, enjoying the a/c, and getting a cold drink to get you through the walk.

      Also, I don’t usually switch Metro cars when I get one with no a/c. It seems like the a/c is often out in the whole train (people will run into the car and then say “it’s hot in here, too,” but with more expletives), and I’d rather just sit still than waste my energy rushing to another car only to still be overheated and maybe not have a seat.

      I think Kat did a post about this a while ago. While I’m sure you’ll get posts here (although, as mentioned above, it is cooling off in DC right now), there was a whole thread devoted to it that might be useful, too.

    • I wear ponytails all summer long and pin my bangs to my head for the walk to/from Metro (it looks terrible, but it works). Also, I try to wear washable tops (sleeveless if possible) and lightweight skirts. I have a big leather tote and I lay my jacket across the top of this to carry it on my walk. It’s gross. Really gross. And as for the 97 degree high today, wtf? I’m thinking about putting away my summer things for the winter but the thought of tweed right now just makes me miserable.

    • Welcome to DC! as others noted, this is not bad humidity; it’s actually quite nice outside. Try building more time into your schedule and not walk so fast. Also, build in time to cool off once you’re inside – do you have a fan you can blow on yourself when you are sitting at your desk?

      Alternatively, is there a bus line you can take from the metro to your office? And/or is there a bus line you can take, rather than take the metro, that drops off closer to the office? i.e. I love the Circulator and would take that, over the metro.

    • Welcome to DC! In addition to the other great tips, I will add – figure out how you sweat and how to dress for it. If you sweat on your back, look for tops in dark colors, and absorbent fabrics (no silk). If you sweat under your arms, adjust your summer wardrobe to include lots of sleeveless tops that won’t show marks. Invest in cardigans, shawls or blazers to layer in the over-air-conditioned buildings.

      Do as little of your makeup as you can before leaving the house, and then finish when you get to work. (For the love of Pete, do not finish it on the Metro!)

      I will also say that most people here understand that it’s hot, and that a lot of commutes involve transit or walking. So just make the best of it.

    • This probably depends on your office dress code but I wear tank tops/sleeveless shells under my suits in summer. I carry my suit jacket on the commute and then put it on when I actually get to work. It means I can’t really take my jacket off during the day but I’m usually cold inside.

      • Yep… layers. Since the offices here are about -10 degrees but it is brutally hot out, you’ll need to learn to layer. So when you go outside, just strip down until you can sort of stand the heat.

        It is awful here. It’s hard to feel not gross in the summer. Welcome to DC :)

      • Agreed. Keep in mind that most federal offices are cooled to subarctic temperatures. I always feel guilty turning on my spaceheater when it’s sweltering outside.

    • Honey Pillows :

      Not sure when you got here, but this week has been gorgeous! You’ll acclimate to it by next July, I hope.

      Re: humidity and hair, it might feel shellacked and very 80′s, but humidity-resistant hairspray is your friend.

      Re: clothes, invest in cotton, linen, washable fabrics, and if you’re into it, seersucker. Seersucker and slightly wrinkled linen is completely acceptable on the Hill, and in most offices in DC, because we’re still a bit southern at heart.

      Drink water.

      I repeat:

      Drink water.

      Seconding advice to apply makeup in the office bathroom.

      And if you can, take some time to go sightseeing! The weather really is quite nice right now, and there’s plenty going on! Link to DCist below to avoid moderation.

    • This might sound funny, but one of my favorite things about DC is the way everyone has to suffer through the summers together. I’m from the Seattle area originally, I’ve grown to love DC summers! (Plus the summer nights here have the west coast beat hands down). EVERYONE is sweating, and there’s nothing really to do about it, so there’s no shame. Welcome to town!

  13. Double Hoo :

    Does anyone have experience of interviewing or working with a recruitment consulting firm (to work for them, not for them to place me somewhere)? I have an unexpected but welcome interview next week, and I’ve never worked in that field before. Any tips would be much appreciated.

    My particular concern is salary negotiation, as it’s a commission-based position with a very low base salary. If I get the job, I’ll have to move from a low COLA to a major city, but the base is potentially going to be lower than my previous salary. I want to push them for a base of at least my previous salary, but I don’t know how to respond if they come back with “your total earnings will be more but we can’t increase the base.” Is this a good gamble to take, given my lack of experience in the industry? The difference is only a few K, so I’m hoping they will be flexible, but I don’t know how reliable the performance-based total earnings figures actually are in terms of a secure salary.

    (this is for a company based in the UK, if that helps)

  14. Calling all book recommendations! I was in an accident this week and am taking today (and maybe Tuesday) off to recuperate. All levels of engagement/types of books are appreciated, but I’m on a heavy dose of Vicodin, so lets not get too literary, here.

    • Gone Girl, Bossy Pants, Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me?–all really fun reads! Get better!

      • Bossy Pants & Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me are great.

        I’ll throw in a recommendation for The Book Thief. Hands down fantastic.

    • Vintage Lawyer :

      Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn

      • yes! I just read this based on suggestions here and this book is a twisty page turner!!

        another book that is really fascinating is Zeitoun.

    • Hunger Games, if you haven’t read those already. The Twilight books might be fun on vicodin, but you might feel a little dirty/ashamed after reading them. I know I did.

      Hope you heal up fast.

    • DC Association :

      Before I went to the beach I picked up a book at Costco by Elin Hildebrandt (may not be correct spelling of last name but very close) b/c it was $4.99 and was called “Summer People” – looked at it and it said, BEACH! so I picked it up. Since then I have read four more of her books. They are all set on Nantucket. Most have a sad story as the undercurrent but they are totally engaging. Definitely recommend.

    • Brooklyn, Esq. :

      I’m reading The Unlikely Pilgrimage of Harold Fry. I’m about halfway through and I love it. Not trashy but fairly light reading, plus the story is very compelling.

      Also, feel better!

    • The Paris Wife by Paula McLain and Elizabeth Street by Laurie Fabiano if you like historical fiction.

    • SF Bay Associate :

      How To Be a Woman. It’s laugh out loud funny and yet blowing my mind.

      • Second the rec for How to Be a Woman. I feel like I need to keep a copy of this with me at all times so I can whip it out and be like, “Is this sexism? Is this misogyny? Should I take my hairy minge to Dublin? Oh, ah-hah, here’s the answer. Yes, yes, and yes.”

        • Cornellian :

          You’ve sold me on this book…

        • Oops shoulda scrolled down before I posted!

          Also, I think many Corporettes would appreciate the entire chapter she devotes to railing against VPL.

        • Oops shoulda scrolled down before I posted!

          Also, I think many [readers of this website--darn it, mod, you caught me!] would appreciate the entire chapter she devotes to railing against VPL.

        • Ladies, any suggestion for a cool fun hotel in DC for a girls’ weekend? I’m going to visit a friend who’s a newish mother, and we decided to stay in a hotel so she can have an evening away from the baby. Looking for something interesting that vibes “hip” rather than “family-friendly”; proximity to nightlife is more important than proximity to sights. Something like O Mansion (that was sold out) is what we’re going for.

          Also recs for day spas would be greatly appreciated.

          • Argh, not sure how this comment ended up there.

          • Tabard Inn if you want an old-school vibe, or the W for a modern trendy feel. Also Hotel Palomar in Dupont might be a good option.

      • Thirded. Want to hand a copy out to my girlfriends and their daughters (once they get old enough.)

    • Just Kids, Patti Smith’s autobiography.

    • Where’d You Go, Bernadette. Clever and funny.

    • the Circle of Magic and Song of the Lioness quartets. Old school teen fantasy- prefect for a drugged up reading level.
      I reread these on my commute this week and reminisced about how much influence Tamora Pierce had on my “girls can do anything!” mentality growing up :)

      Leviathan by Scott Westerfeld
      A Walk in the Woods: Rediscovering America on the Appalachian trial by Bill Bryson
      Sounds dry, but it was actually hilarious and interesting.

      • ON this note, really anything by Tamora Pierce (who wrote the two quartets that shortiek recommended.) The two books in the Trickster series are a bit more grown up than the other ones.

        • +1 for Tamora Pierce!

          It seems like I’m always waiting for her next novel, because as soon as one is published I instantly read it and then I’m waiting again.

          • SAMESIES. I really like the Beka Cooper series! I hope there’s more soon!

      • SF Bay Associate :

        I loved those books. I wanted to be Alanna of Trebond so, so badly. I’ve never heard of Circle of Magic! I guess I’m going to the library soon…

        • Ooh, the Circle of Magic ones are good! Though the first set (I think there are two quartets and then one stand-alone book) is aimed pretty young (the characters are about 11 in that series, if I remember correctly), the second set and the stand-alone book – The Will of the Empress – are fricking awesome.

          • The second quartet is about the kids solving mass murders, so a little bit darker.

            The Will of the Empress is cool. Melting Stones is also a stand alone in that universe. It’s okay, but not great.

      • Gail the Goldfish :

        I heart Tamora Pierce so hard. The second book of the Song of the Lioness quarter (which I accidentally read first) is what started my subsequent obsession with fantasy books. I prefer her Tortall series to the Circle of Magic ones.

        Also, agree with Bill Bryson. Pretty much anything he writes is laugh-out-loud funny. As in, I no longer read them in public because people look at me funny.

    • Another vote for Hunger Games. I’ve also recently enjoyed Rules of Civility and Cutting for Stone.

  15. Roberta Rich, “Midwife of Venice.”

  16. onehsancare :

    The Night Circus, Erin Morgenstern
    The Art of Fielding, Chad Harbach
    As Meat Loves Salt, Maria McCann
    By George, Wesley Stace
    Blind Sight, Meg Howry
    The Summer of the Bear, Bella Pollen
    This One is Mine, Maria Semple

    When you’re not on drugs: The Sense of an Ending, Julian Barnes

  17. OMG, Banana Republic, I love your petites. I finally bought my first proper suit (ie, not from Smart Set or Suzy Shier, nice wool and good lining, quality construction and detailing), and also got what is possibly my favourite dress ever.

    http://bananarepublic.gapcanada.ca/browse/product.do?cid=70019&vid=3&pid=917379

    That is all. I just needed to share my excitement.

    • oo I love this colour! Great buy!

      • I am so swoony over this dress. All modesty about compliments on it has totally disappeared, lol, as it is just PERFECTLY FABULOUS.

        • Ooh, thanks for the tip Jo! I’ve been thinking of getting a new work dress for the fall and this might be the one! I’ll have to go check it out.

          • They have a very similar one in black (but it’s wool, rather than polyester, and has no belt) but two other people in my office just bought it (and both wore it yesterday!) so I thought 3 of us might be a bit much.

    • SF Bay Associate :

      How does it fit, Jo?

      • It fits great. I tried on the 00P, which barely fit over my hips, but the 0P is *perfect* on my 5′, 100ish lbs frame. Lots of room for the girls (though beccause of the cowl neck, I think it would be just fine on someone less endowed, lol) and does a pretty good job of smooth out the tummy pooch, lol. Plus, no hemming needed, which is a lovely bonus.

        Things vary so much in sizing at the low end that it’s hard for me to say whether it’s TTS or what, but given how many things are just too big, I guess I’d say it runs a bit small.

        • SF Bay Associate :

          So it sounds like it’s not for pears, what with our smaller chests and larger hips. Good to know! You rock that dress, girl :).

          • Yeah, I don’t think it would work so good on pears :( I want EVERYONE to have the pretty dress, lol.

  18. "Allergies" PSA :

    For Godzilla:

    Saw ENT yesterday. CAT scan and scope confirmed that medication is not working. Surgery scheduled for November 1st. (We are traveling internationally for much of October, and the MD said to wait until we return. Otherwise, I would have done it immediately.)

    You? Still taking the meds?

    • Hey gurl! Good for you on scheduling the surgery. My allergy doc gave up on me (hooray, although I have eye drops now for my allergies, which is a GODSEND). I’m kinda scared to make the appointment with the ENT. But I have to. I know it’s ridiculous – I have refills for steroids.

      • "Allergies" PSA :

        Go now!

        I so badly wish that I had started with the ENT back in February instead of delaying by ignoring what I thought was a cold, stoically pushing through what I assumed were allergies, stupidly visiting an accupunturist who said he couldn’t help me because there wasn’t anything physically wrong with my body, seeing an allergist who saw my sinus infection but wanted to start allergy testing anyway. I just was on the phone with my ENT’s nurse, crying, and she shared that “you will be so much happier after the surgery, you will wonder why you didn’t do it earlier.” Had I started earlier, I would be done by now and I would be able to smell and taste all the wonderful smells and tastes I am going to miss on our vacation to far away lands in October.

        Even if you make your first appointment now, who knows how long the ENT process will be and where it will end. (My first ENT appointment was in June and my post-op may extend into January!)

        Do you want me post again in a couple weeks and ask if you’ve scheduled your appointment? Some people find that helpful; others find it irritating. But I can and will if you want me to.

  19. microscience :

    Hive shopping help needed! I really love this Lauren wallet from Hobo international (link below). But, what I really want is something similar that has a detachable long strap (so I could make it a crossbody or at last put it over my shoulder). I swear I’ve seen something like what I’m looking for, but now that I’m in desperate need, of course I cannot find it. The reason I like the lauren is the clasp change pockets on either side, which are much needed to hold Euro coins and Paris metro tickets. Bright colors preferred to find it in the depths of my much larger purse.

    http://www.amazon.com/HOBO-Lauren-Vintage-VI-3385-Fuchsia/dp/B006GIS02U/ref=sr_1_1?s=apparel&ie=UTF8&qid=1346427799&sr=1-1&keywords=hobo+international

    Thanks!

  20. Cornellian :

    Cold weather clothing!

    So after living in Texas for a long time, I’m back in the Northeast. I haven’t lived in a midatlantic city since I was 17, though, and I forget what fall and winter are like. The Texas part of me is definitely confused by how early the summer is ending, though! I have plenty of experience in cold weather (college upstate, winters in central Minnesota, year abroad in Scandinavia and in northeastern Germany), but sort of forget what is miserable and what I always wish I owned, etc. Plus I’m now a grown-up lawyer, so I probably have different needs.

    So far, I think I need:
    -snowboots
    -a serious front and back door mat for me and my huge dog
    -a cheap place to bathe my salt and mud covered dog
    -nice running socks
    -nice running clothes
    -nice smartwood socks
    -heavier handcream

    What am I forgetting??

    • Good gloves and a really good snow shovel.

      • I keep both of these in my car along with an emergency kit containing one of those heat reflecting blankets.

        I would add a knee-length wool coat (I have a cashmere blend in black). I pair it with a scarf, knit hat, and thinsulate gloves with the special fingertips for smartphones.

    • Dog booties! We get them from dogbooties[dot]com–good quality (made for sled dogs) and much cheaper than big box pet stores. And a doggie jacket, if you have a skinny, short-haired dog like I do. We also had an extra plastic bowl for dog paw washing after walks when we lived in an area with snowy winters for days that we didn’t use the booties.

      Gloves, hat, scarf. At least one set for wearing to work/nicer occasions, and one set for walking the dog, running errands, etc. Maybe also one specialized set for running. Winter coat (parka + nicer coat), fall coats (peacoat, fleece, wind/water-resistant something or other–you can get by without that many new things, but I love jackets and have a ton).

      • Depending on your dog, dog booties may be wholly unnecessary. My dog (60lbs, sort of lab like in build/coat) has no use for them.

        However, we live in the ‘burbs, so my dog spends his time romping in the snow in our yard and much less time on the salty sidewalks than a city pooch. If your dog won’t wear/you won’t deal with booties, check out mushers wax.

        • We use the booties to protect the paws, not for warmth. In addition to salt/gravel on sidewalks, our dog split the webbing between her toes on a rock that was hidden under some snow. I’ll admit that our dog may be more accident prone than most, though.

    • Silk long underwear, warm scarves (indoor and outdoor), winter hat that–according to my mother’s wisdom–covers your ear, scraper for windshield (get one with a super long handle and a brush), blankets (I require down in cold weather), warm coat (down-filled if you can), sunglasses (snow glare is awful).

      • Also, controlling humidity can be very helpful to staying warm at home. I would get a humidity measurement thingy and plan on buying a humidifier or a dehumidifier.

      • Oh yes on the hat that covers your ears. A hat that doesn’t is no use at all in cold weather.

      • Honey Pillows :

        Oh yes, silk long underwear is amaaazing.

        Also the hats. Yes, you will get hat hair. Yes, your ears will be warm.

    • will you be living downtown or in a suburban area?

      for city winters:
      - definitely scarf and gloves. Hat is up to you – I hate them (my head is big so they ALWAYS leave little ridges in my forehead, not to mention my hair) so I skip them.
      - nice winter coat that fits over a suit jacket
      - lots of ladies also have a northface knee length puffy jacket. Maybe I’m just not as cold-sensitive, but I have never felt they were super necessary, and they’re also a PITA to carry around once you’re inside somewhere.
      - if you don’t have rainboots, I actually prefer them to “snowboots” because city winter walking = stomping through puddles of slush at the street corners, and smushing around brown, melty snow on sloppily shoveled sidewalks, more than keeping actual fluffy snow out of your shoes. You can wear nice heavy socks with them to keep your toes warm.
      - if you will be responsible for your sidewalk area, you will probably want some kind of melt-it product (are there enviro-friendly ones now?) particularly if you have a brick sidewalk/stairs, which is not fun to shovel.

      • I should add, my tips are for Philly, which (with a few outlier years) tends not to have really long lasting horrible cold — ladies that are farther north will probably disagree re: the necessity of the puffy coat.

      • On the snow melt products, make sure you get one that is pet safe.

    • emcsquared :

      I keep a plastic shoe tray next to my door in the winter for dirty shoes – it seems like no doormat is large enough to hold both me and my accumulation of dirty/wet winter shoes. And I saw a suggestion to fill the tray with pebbles so your shoes don’t have to sit in their own puddles, so I’ll probably try that this year.

      And mineral oil in case your dog’s paws or nose get chapped; the vet suggested it as a nontoxic alternative to lotion for my dog’s poor chapped feet last winter. Although it is a laxative, so we try not to be *too* heavyhanded when applying it. The vet also suggested a pack of wet wipes and a towel by the door so we could wipe the salt off the dog’s feet when we got home from a walk.

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