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Something on your mind? Chat about it here. Oh, hai. I’m just hanging out, doing my laundry. Yep, everything else was dirty — and I never get to wear this dress, and that’s a pity because, you know, it’s gorgeous, and I love it, and we all need to wear this dress. I somehow stumbled on this dress and now can’t decide what iteration I need more — the rose mermaid dress (pictured) or — and I’ll admit this is where the smart money is — on the knee-length dress that looks very similar, from the same designer? This cocktail-length dress has the markings of a winner — it comes in 10 colors (!), sizes 0-16, regular and petites — looks like you can wear a bra with it without problems — and it has 14 glowing reviews. I like — a lot. Even better? The cocktail dress is only $238. (The rose mermaid gown is pretty affordable also, at $298.) Tadashi Shoji Embroidered Lace Sheath Dress Here’s a lovely plus-size cocktail dress with lace details, as well.Workwear sales of note for 5.5.24
Our favorites are in bold!
- Nordstrom – Nordy Club members earn 3X the points on beauty; 30% off selected shoes
- Ann Taylor – 30% off your purchase (ends 5/12); $50 off your $200+ purchase (ends 5/5)
- Banana Republic Factory – Spend your StyleCash with 40-60% off everything, or take an extra 20% off purchase (ends 5/6)
- Brooks Brothers – 30% off women’s collection
- Boden – 10% off full-price styles
- Eloquii – $19 & up 300+ styles and up to 50% off everything else
- Everlane – Shorts from $40; bottoms from $60
- J.Crew – Shirts & tees starting at $24.50; extra 30% off sale styles
- J.Crew Factory – Up to 60% off everything; up to 70% off clearance
- Lo & Sons – Mother’s Day Sale, up to 40% off
- M.M.LaFleur – 100s of styles on sale, including classic shoes!
- Talbots – 40% off one item & and 30% off everything else; $50 off $200 (all end 5/5)
- White House Black Market – 30% off select full-price styles; extra 30% off sale styles & additional 20%
- Brooklinen – Anniversary Sale, 25% off
- Crate & Barrel – Up to 30% off spring refresh; up to 20% outdoor; up to 35% off spring kitchen event
- West Elm – Up to 60% off
Some of our latest posts here at Corporette…
And some of our latest threadjacks here at Corporette (reader questions and commentary) — see more here!
Stay tuned for a list of our latest threadjacks!
Anon
Friendship + business question
I am friends with two few real estate agents- one I am close with than the other. I have decided to look to buy a house, and am using an agent recommended to me by a friend. I did not want to work with any of my friends because I do not liking mixing friendship and business, and also quite frankly I think this agent is better and more knowledgeable about what I am looking for.
Do I tell my friends now? Do I wait until I purchase? I feel like no matter what they’re going to be annoyed/hurt/upset.
Niktaw
Friendship and business don’t mix. I’d tell the friend that you value your relationship too much and don’t want to subject it to the risk of doing business together.
Anon
I disagree with the idea that the two don’t mix. If you respect your friend’s talent it can be absolutely fine and great as you have someone who really cares working for your cause. Doesn’t sound like that’s the situation for OP so she needs a little white lie to keep the peace.
Eliza
+1.
Anon
Good idea. Should I tell them before I buy? Before I start looking? Or after?
Laura
You could always say that since you’re friends with multiple agents, you didn’t want to have to play favorites.
CountC
As a RE agent, I would want to know earlier rather than later. I would respect your decision even though it would sting, but it would hurt even more to find out after you’d closed!
Anon
Posted on the C-Moms site as well, thank you for all of the responses there – question for all you law ladies who have transitioned in-house – is 12 weeks fully paid maternity leave standard in corporate? I’m looking at an offer where the pay is pretty great (still a pay-cut but not as bad as I thought), 4 weeks vacation, standard health benefits (incl. short-term disability), retirement, etc. but maternity leave is only 8 weeks fully paid, which is 10 weeks less than at my firm. I’m wondering if this is something I should have negotiated further, or if the higher salary makes up for it? From the responses I’ve gotten, it’s sounding like the standard in corporate may be even less than my offer, but thought I would get some more opinions. Thanks all.
Anon
I feel like it’s really defeating the purpose of the Mom’s s!te to post questions on both…
Anon2
Holy moderation. Sorry for the inevitable dup post..
Personally, I don’t. Not a mom here, but there are likely a lot of moms on this s!te who don’t identify with C-Moms first – maybe the kids are older, or something. I think of any webs!te with “moms” in the title is referring to new moms and is serving as some sort of support group. Lots of older/experienced moms wouldn’t be attracted to a s!te like that, and therefore aren’t able to provide advice or answer questions for people like the OP.
Anon3
Agreed. Also, not a mom yet, and probably won’t be one for a few years, but I do know our company’s policy (i’m in-house). 8 weeks paid, another 4 unpaid (or more w/approval).
Anon
I hate that there’s a separate site. As women, “mom” issues are going to be things our friends deal with even if we personally don’t, and as employers we should care about what people struggle with whether it’s parenthood, student loans,difficult bosses, dress codes, etc. So can we please lay off the segregation of the parenting topics?
Signed -Child free by choice and I still care
Red Beagle
+1
Batgirl
+100
NYNY
No one canwin here: When someone posts a motherhood-related question, she’s told to go to the mom page. When she says she did, but is looking for more input, she gets grief for that.
Anon2
Personally, I don’t. Not a mom here, but there are likely a lot of moms on this s!te who don’t identify wit CMoms first – maybe the kids are older, or something. I think of any webs!te with “moms” in the title is referring to new moms and is serving as some sort of support group. Lots of older/experienced moms wouldn’t be attracted to a s!te like that, and therefore aren’t able to provide advice or answer questions for people like the OP.
Anonymous
I’m not a lawyer but I do work for a large corporation. I will be having my first baby in March and we receive 4 weeks (natural birth) 6 weeks (C-section) of 60% of our salary from short-term disability and have to take PTO for the other weeks we want off up to 12 weeks. I am saving up my PTO to take 4 weeks STD and 6 weeks PTO. Your deal sounds pretty sweet.
WestCoast Lawyer
In-house here. I got 12 weeks. Part of it was fully-paid, but that was through a hodgepodge of state disability, company supplemental disability policy, accrued vacation and sick leave. I think the first 2 months ended up being fully-paid, and maybe 60% for 2 weeks after that and then unpaid for 1-2 weeks at the end. Your deal seems pretty reasonable, but I would also think they might be willing to let you take the extra 3 weeks off as unpaid leave.
AnonLawMom
Not sure what’s standard but, fwiw, I passed up an IH offer for this exact reason. I waiver on whether I think it was ultimately the best career choice but I am so grateful for the extra time I had at home after my daughter was born. So in the big picture, it was worth staying at the firm.
Anon BigLaw
That’s for lawyers. I was very surprised that while we give the lawyers good benefits (we’re all on the same insurance plan), staff gets 6 weeks off, period. And if they’re nursing, they have to figure out pumping with no logistical help or wean early b/c only a few have rooms with doors and we have no pumping room or empty offices / conference rooms available for them.
Anonymous
A counterpoint: At my big firm, staff gets the same amount of leave as lawyers. And in my small office, we set up a pumping room and ordered a mini fridge and pump for the first woman in the office to have a baby, who happened to be an administrative assistant.
Anonymama
I’m surprised at this, esp if you’re in big law… Isn’t providing a private place to pump a federal requirement?
'Murica
I’ve worked for three different Fortune 500 companies, and none of them offered 12 weeks fully paid. From what I remember, it was usually something like 40-60% paid, and then you could use short-term disability to top it off. I think that’s pretty standard, unfortunately.
Anon
We get 8 weeks at 100% and then another 4 at 60%.
Brant
I’m not a lawyer but work for a company with a lot of in-house lawyers that come from big law. Our mat leave is 8 weeks paid 12 weeks total. On balance, we have unlimited PTO (at the discretion of your manager). I took my 8 weeks then came back. 1 day/ week for 6 weeks and the other 4 days were PTO. I’m mid/senior level and straight up told my boss 8 weeks paid was not enough (in time or $) and that competitive firms offered more. Boss didn’t bat an eye at my proposal and has been great since then about time off!
In House Lobbyist
My company offers 6 weeks for vaginal birth and 8 weeks for c- section through STD. I think it was 80% for that time and anything else was PTO. I left the firm at 7 months pregnant and gave up 3 months paid leave and it was the best decision for me. Yes I had no leave built up but not having the pressure to get and bill hours with a newborn was great.
NYInHouse
In-house corporate lawyer here at a big company. All our maternity leave goes under the “short-term disability” plan, which seems in theory messed up to me. The benefits work out to be pretty generous depending on how long you’ve been at the company, though. 2-4 years means 8 weeks at 100% salary and 18 weeks at 60%. I do wonder whether you get all of it in practice.
Meg March
I’m going to Boston for a weekend at the start of November to visit a friend who just started grad school there. Any ideas on what we should do? I’ve never been to Boston, and she hasn’t really done anything except grad school since she got there. No shopping-as-activity (poor grad school student). I’ll be staying with her in the dorms at Hahvard.
LilyStudent
Go and get a manicure, pretending to be Elle Woods?
Anonymous
Cute. If this is a goal, MiniLux is the place to go. A nice stroll down Newberry St.
Anonymous
Visit your ancestral home in Concord if you can. Wander through Cambridge, the South End, the North End, eat, drink. It’s a small city so you can cover lots of ground.
rachelellen
There was some discussion of a DC meet-up some time ago… did it happen and I missed it? Or can we plan something? And by “we” I mean “other women who know the city and have their act together more than I”? But seriously, I am willing to help if that means anything.
Bonnie
There was and I dropped the ball. Work interfering with life again. Those interested, send me an email to dccorpore**e at yahoo dot com (replace * with t) and we can find the best time for everyone. Someone mentioned weekend brunch so send me your thoughts and I’ll send out the group email.
Marie
I’m a big fan of the Donkey Show at the Oberon in Harvard Sq on Saturday night. The Hahvahd Tour that starts at the Harvard Sq T stop is pretty good. The Harvard Natural history museum is really cool and your friend may be able to get you in for free.
Not sure how cold it is up there, but the Arnold Arboretum in Jamaica Plain (T stop Forest Hills) is beautiful and peaceful.
The New England Aquarium is excellent, and the seals are outside so you can see them for free. A favorite activity of mine used to be grab some “chowdah” at Quincy Market/Faneuil Hall, look at the harbor, and see the seals.
For brunch, show up early at The Neighborhood in Union Square (5 minute taxi or Uber from the square, 25 minute walk). Best brunch in cambridge/somerville but definitely get there on the early side.
Have a great trip and say hi to the pretty leaves for me.
Frozen Peach
Glass flowers in the Harvard Natural History museum (Harvard U students and a guest get in free). John Harvard’s Brewpub. Harvard Book Store and the Coop. Mr. Bartley’s Burgers. The Upper Crust pizza. (All of those are in Harvard Square).
In Boston, the Isabella Stewart Gardner museum is a must. The MFA is cool too. I disagree on the aquarium, I think it’s expensive and WAY overrated.
Miss Behaved
Or the double cheeseburger special at Charlie’s Kitchen. They also have an amazing beer selection on tap. My dad’s been going there since he was an undergrad. He’s in his 70s now.
Anonymous
Shopping and food on Newbury street and looking at the pretty buildings there. Harvard Sq has great food and concerts at the Sinclair and some decent shopping. You can do the touristy stuff too: Boston Commons if its nice out + Freedom Trail + Fanieul Hall + Paul Revere’s house. Or you can do museums: ICA, MFA, Isabella Stewart Gardner. Or naturey things: the arboretum in JP, Mt. Auburn cementary
Anon2
Boston Public Library! Beauuutiful inside!
Must be Tuesday
Yes!
Miss Behaved
The Boston Athenaeum is also open to the public. It’s a library, but it’s also got an amazing art collection.
Anonymous
Get a Charlie Card when you get there. So much easier than trying to drive and park unless you can pay lots for parking all over.
+1 for Donkey Show. SO much fun!
Skywalk Observatory at the Prudential Center’s a touristy way to get a bird’s eye view of the famous spots of the city and hear about their history (audiotour comes with your visit). I’ve heard the restaurant Top of the Hub has some affordable lunch options and sometimes has cheap happy hour specials.
Duck Tours are another touristy history thing.
Freedom Trail is totally free if it’s not too cold to walk.
Art in the Isabella museum is good (also, the theft is interesting to read about), but I’d go when kids are in school. We had an awful experience there- didn’t see any signs saying not to use your phone (maybe people were standing in front of them?) so I got yelled at by a guard for taking a call in a courtyard… while we were surrounded by screaming, running children who were at no point told to stop running or stop screaming.
We had a much better time at the MFA- I think I’ve been 3 or 4 times and always enjoyed it.
In the Kendall Square area (a few stops from Harvard Square) Friendly Toast breakfast is good but anticipate weekend morning lines that are crazzzzy.
Area Four is also at that Kendall Square/MIT stop and I LOVE their breakfast skillets. Seriously amazing (plus good brunch cocktails).
anon +45
Longshot, but can anyone recommend sites like Corprette that aren’t geared towards lawyers? There have got to be “overachieving chicks” who blog about work, fashion, & life but don’t have to wear boring (sorry, it’s true) suits every day & don’t live in big East Coast cities. What about the overachieving chicks in high tech, marketing, academia, HR, & management of all types?
Google is incredibly unhelpful on this topic — either such blogs don’t exist, or they’re not SEO friendly.
Anon
Sadly I think this is as good as it gets for workplace issues discussions. I also hate the fashion on here (and really chafe at even calling it “fashion”) so I just look at style blogs instead and ignore the commentary around Lands End here.
MNF
Ha! Just got an order from Lands End – so happy about it! I was going to post the dress I got because it’s really flattering and they’ve got sales this weekend!
ETA – Caphill Style? But OP if you find another s!te, let us know!
Anonymous
+1
A Lands End ponte dress will never be fashion.
Red Beagle
Fashion, no. Supremely comfortable and well-manufactured? Yes. Do I recommend? Yes. Although that could be because I’m at the older end of the age range of posters here. And to the OP, I’m not in law (public sector, transit agency administration), and although this s*te skews towards women in law, I find the vast majority of the commentary and fashion picks helpful, even in my business casual west coast office. I’ve checked out other s*tes and blogs and always come back here because the commentary is intelligent and nurturing for the most part. Relatively little snark and virtually no flaming. Perhaps we owe that to diligent moderation, and if that is it, kudos to Kat and her team. I lurked for a long time before starting to post here and I keep my eyes open for other options but I don’t feel excluded because I’m not a lawyer chick.
A Clark
Hahaha, you’re awesome. THANK YOU. Lands End is not workplace attire. Gah. Even Pendleton felt like crap and I’m just left wondering if I’m superbly picky or if other people really don’t notice fabric/workmanship.
Also agree, that this might be it for workplace issues discussion.
Monday
Ask A Manager is quite good for work-related advice and discussions, encompassing all fields, and coed.
anon +45
I like reading Ask a Manager, but it’s very specific — often geared towards interviewing or personnel problems. Very useful when you need that sort of thing, but not the kind of site you read all-purpose engagement, entertainment, or community (esp. not community, since it’s very one-way, Q&A style).
Em
Jesus, other people don’t have *money* is what you’re missing, I think.
Anon
No, h&m, Zara, thrift stores, sample sales are all cheaper or on par w lands end and are far more fashionable.
Anonymous
Really? I’m not singing the praises of Lands End but I’ve rarely found a really great piece for work there and the casual clothes show wear really quickly and are often extraordinarily thin or cheap material. Thrift stores and sample sales are great if you have time and are locationally advantaged but hardly a requirement for being professionally dressed on a budget. No, wearing a ponte free from Lands End or the equivalent won’t make you a fashionista but it may, depending on circumstances, make you perfectly appropriately dressed for work with a minimum of hassle or expense. Which is a completely legitimate approach to dressing for work and not always an easy one to achieve.
anon +45
Yeah, I read a lot of fashion blogs, but so many have insane ideas of work-friendly attire — there’s got to be *something* between a basic black suit & 14 pattern in one outfit with sky-high heels with a chunky statement necklace, LOL.
Anonymous
Capitol Hill Style is geared to lawyers somewhat (especially now that the author is in law school) but her clothing picks are way more in line with my style than most of what’s on Corporette. Classy Cubicle is another work fashion blog I like. Many of her outfits are too casual or fashion forward for Big Law but would work in a lot of other workplaces.
And most lawyers, and most commenters here, don’t wear suits to work every day. You may not like the outfits here but they don’t mostly revolve around suits. Just saying.
LilyStudent
There’s a workwear blog in the UK called The Workwear Edit.
Brit
The Classy Cubicle has some great outfits that aren’t boring, but the comment section doesn’t look to be very active, if that’s what you’re really looking for.
Miss Behaved
Just because the majority here work in Law doesn’t mean there aren’t others of us here, too. I have a high tech job at a university and I don’t wear suits ever , unless I’m interviewing.
Enginon
Yeah I feel the same… I’m a regular lurker but sometimes the law focus can feel a bit overwhelming. What’s considered standard workplace attire, price differentials, etc. …and if commenting to ask for career advice you usually need to specify you’re not in law, otherwise people will probably assume you’re an attorney.
OTOH I’ve still found it very useful to read the posts and comments here. Definitely helped me avoid any egregious fashion blunders of the party-girl variety as an entry-level. And I figure there’s still enough in common between any white-collar-professional male-dominated career path that it’s helpful to hear other women’s perspectives, even if I sometimes need to recalibrate the advice to my particular office. :)
TL;DR: Sorry, no suggestions, but +1!
Kerry
Have you seen academichic? It is no longer an active site, but the archives are awesome re: fashion, academics, and feminism. Love love love & wish they were still posting.
Equity's Darling
Happy Thanksgiving to my Canadians! What’s on the menu? What are your holiday plans?
All I know is that pumpkin beer is going to happen. And hopefully a fire pit with smores.
KittyKat
Candied sweet potatoes and pumpkin pie are my duties. The rest will be up to my friend. Cider is my festive alcohol of choice.
Nonny
Nothing really planned. My parents will be visiting, which will be fabulous. We aren’t doing turkey, that I know, but I’m not sure what we are having in its stead.
The most exciting thing – since my parents are coming, my SO and I get to go out for date night tomorrow night, for basically the first time since January!
Anonymous
So I was feeling really cute and great about my outfit today until one of my coworkers told me it looks like I’m wearing a Star Trek uniform.
Lady Tetra
Eh, I noticed at lunch that the back of my sweater is covered in cat hair. Also, I’m sure your outfit is cute! Some Star Trek uniforms were pretty rockin’ if I recall.
Anonymous
haha, I think it’s cute! I’m also really into Star Trek though, which might indicate that I’m not the sort of person with great fashion sense (also true)
Anon
Agree with Lady Tetra – don’t sweat it, I’m sure you look great (unless they meant you look like Guinan, in which case, please take off your ginormous hat at work).
Sydney Bristow
Or Counselor Troi. Because no matter how much the fashion industry tries to push jumpsuits I’m just not convinced that they look good on any real person.
Carrie...
I hear you….
I remember the day after the Seinfield episode about the “puffy shirt” was on TV. That day, at least 10 people asked me, “Did you seen Seinfeld last night?”. I hadn’t. I didn’t know what they were referring to.
Then I saw the episode.
And I never wore that shirt again.
Ahhhh… the 90’s.
Bonnie
I have a green dress that I have not worn recently because the last time I wore it, a coworker compared me to the jolly green giant.
Aurora
After wanting a dog my entire life and never being allowed one, I am finally in a stable enough place to adopt a 5-year-old corgi/spaniel mix who is just as adorable and sweet as they come. Her foster mom is bringing her tomorrow so we can bond over the long weekend and I am SO excited! With that said… since this is my favorite place for advice, I figured I’d ask here to pass the time until she arrives.
Any tips on how to make the transition to a new home as easy as possible, and how to make sure she’s happy and well-cared for? I work full time, so I’m hiring a midday dog walker, and I feel like I’ve tried to do lots of reading about proper diet, exercise, clicker training, etc., but I still feel like there is so much I don’t know. Advice would be much appreciated!
rosie
Ask her foster mom what kind of food she’s on, and get that. You can transition her to something else slowly (mix with old food, gradually change to all new food), but our rescue recommended starting with what they used to avoid too many changes at once & tummy trouble.
Are you going to crate train? If yes, get a crate and set it up where you plan to keep it.
Other items you need–leash/collar (unless that is being provided), tag with her name & your contact info, food bowls, treats, a couple toys (although I wouldn’t get too much stuff until you figure out what she likes & what she can destroy), bed or blanket (either for the crate or for the floor).
Do you already know what vet you will use?
Have you decided if she will be allowed on furniture? Good to be consistent.
Other than that, a big congrats & a special thank you for adopting (and an adult dog, at that–we adopted our dog when she was 4, and after 5 years, she is still a delight). Your pup sounds adorable!
Aurora
Thanks for such a thorough response! I have a vet for emergencies who I took my cat to when she occasionally needed something, but since cats are so low-key it was mostly just vaccines; I have no idea how that vet is with dogs. I might try to find someone new & closer to home (cat vet is a half hour drive away) since I’ve heard dogs need more regular medical care — do you know if are there any particular things to look for when finding a good dog vet?
rosie
I would ask around. And definitely find somewhere that is somewhat convenient for you. And don’t be afraid to switch if you don’t like how they treat your dog or don’t communicate well with you.
Anonymous
Find out where your closest 24 hour emergency vet is. You may never need it, but you will be thankful if there is ever a time off hours when something bad is eaten, a paw gets hurt, etc. and you need to rush there.
Anon
You’ll want to be up to date on vaccinations and all that pronto esp since if ever need to drop her at doggie daycare, they’ll want immunization records. Also, take lots of photos (seriously, I wish we had taken more photos of our pooch as a puppy.. :-) )
kc
Sounds like you’ve done all the right stuff. I’ve found that consistent walking and exercise are big factors in having a well-behaved dog. I think just remember that you will need to adjust your life now. Having a pet is not the same as having a kid, but there are similarities. You HAVE to come home after work to let the dog out, you can’t be gone for 15 hours on a Saturday, you can’t just go on a weekend trip on a whim, etc…Also, just to ensure bonding, I wouldn’t go away for a few days (like a weekend trip) until you and the dog have had a chance to properly bond. This could give the dog seperation anxiety, and it’s already had enough upheaval in it’s life. Good luck and great job! I love my dog!
emeralds
+1 all of this. A tired dog is a good dog. So glad you’re getting a furball! It’s a big adjustment but it’s the best decision I ever made, hands down :)
Sara
I would add to make sure your work and personal calendar is open and flexible. I stressed a lot about being gone for the first couple of weeks and wanted to get home as soon as I could.
mascot
An adult dog is (usually) easier than a puppy, especially if she’s housebroken. A great way to bond with your dog is to take a basic obedience class. Also, it can take several months for a dog to adapt to a new place. So be patient with any accidents or shifts in mood.
TackyB
+1 for obedience training. Singlehandedly the best thing I did with my dog.
Anon
Completely agree with the basic obedience class. For behavioral, training and new-dog issues, Patricia McConnell is a great resource – both her books and her online blog.
Miz Swizz
I adopted a puppy about a month ago and here are my tips:
1. Read up on crate training if you plan to go that route. We found out after a couple of bad days that we hadn’t transitioned our dog into the crate properly so we had to doubleback and try again. The ASPCA has a good webs1te and Cesar Millan’s webs1te (cesarswaydotcom) has some good advice.
2. Buy lots of treats and poop bags.
3. Look into collar alternatives. Our dog is much better behaved on a leash attached to a harness. He pulls when it’s on his collar and he haaaaaaaaaated the gentle lead. He still wears his collar because it has his tags on it but that’s the only reason.
4. Look into a local pet store. I’ve gotten great information about dog food, training, help with fitting his harness from the folks at a couple of local stores. The workers at big box stores haven’t been as helpful or knowledgeable.
Congrats on the new addition!
Aurora
Thank you all for so many helpful comments!
anon
NEVER use cesar milan… almost every great trainer says this is a horrible training method (though good for tv). Stick only with positive-reinforcement training (which is taught even in basic places like petco/petsmart, if you take a beginner’s training class there, you’ll learn the basics and it’ll help the bonding process). Go to a local petshop and find out how soon a beginner’s class starts and sign up for it, this will help with bonding and training so it’s better to do this ASAP!
Plan to crate train and prepare the right sized crate (large enough to stand and to turn around, no larger, with sides either plastic or that you drape a blanket over to create a den rather than open wire, and with padded base). Pre-decide on a schedule with the dog and use it immediately so the dog knows what to expect (ex: my alarm goes off, I go to the bathroom to pee, I take you out of the crate, put you on your leash, we walk, we come in, I feed you, you lounge around while I get ready, you’re in your crate for the day and I leave the radio/tv on, I come home at the same time each day, I pee, then I take you out, leash you, we walk, we hang out together, I turn off the tv, I leash you, we walk, you go into your crate to sleep) then follow it exactly so the dog is confident in her schedule and in her relationship with you.
If you’re going to have a dog walker, make sure the walker comes at/near the same time each day and has a routine as well, one you can comfortably follow on weekends.
(Keep in mind to build in time for yourself in the routine. For example, if you typically pee as soon as you wake up, don’t teach the dog that she goes out the minute she hears your alarm clock or you’ll have to do the pee dance down the block or she might have an accident in the future, waiting to go while you pee.)
Also, get to know what makes the dog happy; is it a dog who wants tons of exercise or one that prefers tons of snuggles? Does the dog prefer treats or praise for doing well? What type(s) of toys does the dog prefer to play with and how do you play with each other?
Bonnie
Our recently adopted puppy is sleeping right next to me now. A 5 heal old dog should be more chill but be prepared for the dog to have some abandonment issues and separation anxiety. Consider taking off a couple days when you get the dog to ease the transition. Also, don’t feel pressured to crate train. We were able to close off our kitchen with baby gates and keep our puppy there while at work. At other times she is with us and has a bed in our bedroom. Good luck!
girl in the stix
Probably too late but one thing about dogs–they love routine. It makes them feel secure. So, feed at the same time, walks at same time, bed, etc. Also, lots of positive reinforcement. And if you can, take a training class–it’s as much for the owner as it is for the dog. Enjoy your new roommate!
Jessica Glitter
Hey ladies! I wanted to share a blog that Texas Young Lawyer’s Association just launched dealing with women’s workplace issues. (www.lawyerswholunchblog.com) It is in its infancy, but we would love feedback and comments from savvy women attorneys throughout the country.
Have a great weekend!
MNF
Love the blog name!
Tunnel
I tried the short dress on and it has fit issues in the bust – the “v” comes down much further in the front than the picture portrays. I would have needed to get it altered (it was beyond fashion tape), so I passed. Otherwise, it is flattering and beautiful.
KittyKat
I spend my work days restraining and minimizing my boobs, for cocktail wear I like to show them off so you actually just sold me on this dress.
Anonymous
My boobs are my favorite evening accessory.
BankrAtty
Love this. Stealing this.
Anon
Sigh. They used to be mine too….2 pregnancies and 47 months of breastfeeding later, I still think about how nice they were.
Baconpancakes
YES! Back in the dating world after a long-term relationship, and I realize I’ve only bought work-appropriate or wedding-appropriate clothes for the past four years. I need more boob-showcasing clothes.
Slightly related TJ: Any non-tank, going-out, boob-showcasing tops to recommend?
Anonymous
Ann Taylor. Hear me out. At the moment they have several crossover tops. These display my bosom very nicely, and in black, with a sparkly necklace, don’t look like work wear.
Blonde Lawyer
Just spent two hours at the mall and found none. I own sweaters, suits, sundresses and work out clothes and no fall/winter going out clothes! Grrrr.
Sydney Bristow
I’m going to be maid of honor in a friend’s wedding in a few months and I suggested the short one as a potential dress. Thanks for sharing about the fit issue.
jen
FWIW, I wore this dress in teal to a wedding and I got ALL THE COMPLIMENTS. I was seriously stopped at least 25 times by someone wanting to know who made it. Best purchase ever.
For fit, I note that I’m a very busty hourglass, and this made my waist look smaller than it is. It definitely has a very deep V, so I wouldn’t wear it to any professional functions, but it’s great for any other cocktail events.
Also, as a heads up, Nordstrom frequently has this dress on deep sale in various colors, so if you’re interested, you can definitely get it for less than $150 if you’re flexible on color.
Gail the Goldfish
I lusted after the short dress in teal for quite a while, until I tried it on–for some reason, the lowest band of ribbon is placed such that it makes my hips and thighs look gigantic. However, I found this other Tadashi Shoji short dress (except in dark navy, which no longer seems to be available) that I absolutely love and makes me look amazing: http://shop.nordstrom.com/s/tadashi-shoji-lace-sheath-dress-regular-petite/3905371?origin=keywordsearch-personalizedsort&contextualcategoryid=0&fashionColor=Black%2FNude&resultback=3990&cm_sp=personalizedsort-_-searchresults-_-1_10_C
Anon2b
I’ve long coveted the short version. Someday I may pull the trigger.
mbs
Just bought this Karen Kane dress from Amazon for no reason other than that it was only $26. I think I have a shopping problem. It is cute, though. And everyone needs a black dress, right?
http://www.amazon.com/Karen-Kane-Womens-Sleeve-Cascade/dp/B006IKOJ1C/ref=pd_sim_a_23?ie=UTF8&refRID=0EG0XQNMK78TR55V27CC
Baconpancakes
At this very moment, I’m wearing this dress in a short-sleeve, patterned version. Also paid $26 (at the Dillards sale). I love it. I’d wear it twice a week if I could. It’s a high enough neck (see boob conversation above), a cute pattern, flattering cut, and thick enough fabric to avoid showcasing lines and lumps.
RR
The featured cocktail length dress also comes in plus sizes: http://shop.nordstrom.com/s/tadashi-shoji-embroidered-lace-sheath-dress-plus-size/3905024?origin=category-personalizedsort&contextualcategoryid=0&fashionColor=&resultback=2300&cm_sp=personalizedsort-_-browseresults-_-1_6_C
Anonymous
Oh god and the purple is even $100 off!
Must
Show
Restraint
Senior Attorney
I posted recently about a contretemps with a male friend over his quite disheartening ignorance of the whole concept of privilege in general and male privilege in particular. Although I totally get that it’s not my job to educate him, he has asked me to send him an article or two on the topic. Anybody have any links to particularly helpful articles online? Thanks in advance.
Marie
The invisible knapsack was helpful for me. It’s about white privilege, but nevertheless. link to follow
Marie
http://amptoons.com/blog/files/mcintosh.html
Senior Attorney
Yes, a classic!
Anon
Apologies if this posts twice – a somewhat-apt analogy is found in the article “Straight White Male: The Lowest Difficulty Setting There Is”
Senior Attorney
*snort*
Good one, although not, perhaps, aimed at this particular friend’s Straight White Male demographic…
Ellen
Yay! Open thread’s! I love open thread’s (and Kat, these model’s look cute in their cute dresse’s!).
As for the OP, why should you indulge this male freind (a.k.a. oaf) by haveing to educate him on whatever topic he is dumb on? He has a computer, and unless you are haveing great sex with him, I do NOT think it is your job to make him smart– JUST tell him to googel it! FOOEY on dumb men that want us to do the heavy lifteing to make them look smart, b/c once they know what you told them, then they say you are not any smarter then they are. That is what Alan did so many times to me. I taught him stuff, then he called me dumb when I did NOT know any more on the topic then he did, but he did NOT know anything until I taught him. FOOEY! Especialy b/c he never was abel to teach me anything I wanted to learn about.
I am workeing all day tomorrow b/c I figure I want to get all 18 hours in that I would other wise bill on Monday, then I will take the Amtrack to DC on Sunday, stay over at a hotel (which the manageing partner will pay for), then teach the law school class on Monday, have dinner with the professor, and then take the train home. I will have my Ipad (which has WAN) so I can read corporete on Monday, and mabye even P’ost. Myrna said she wished she could go to see me b/c she wonder’s what kind of professor I would be. We often talk about what we will do after we have babie’s, and being a law professor is one thing I always was told by my professors in law school that I would be so good at! Now I will have the chance to try by speakeing for an hour on litiegation in NY Court’s. I never told the judge I would be doieing this, but I am bringeing PDF’s of some decision’s the judge rendered in my favor includeing a exerpt from a transcript where he praised me and my clotheing and skewered my sweatey adversary!!!! YAY!!!!!
I will ask the professor how I can go about becomeing a law professor in DC, b/c if I can’t get a guy to MARRY me this year, I may have to find a law student to MARRY and IMPREGNATE me as the guy’s who want to have sex with me now are mostley on Social Security! FOOEY! Have a great weekend, fellow HIVE ‘RETTES!!!!! YAY!!!!!
Senior Attorney
It’s always a thrill to get a response from ELLEN!
And you make a good point. I was googling around and found a site that suggested responding to plaintive cries of “I need you to educate me!” with “well, how do you usually find out about things you don’t know about?” I think that’s a pretty good response. FOOEY, indeed.
Aurora
I really like the husky and lizard analogy: https://sindeloke.wordpress.com/2010/01/13/37/. I think the important part is the idea that you aren’t an a**hole because you have privilege, but it’s important to recognize your privilege so you don’t say “well I’ve never experienced this, so it doesn’t exist.”
Senior Attorney
Aurora, thank you! Had never seen that before but it’s terrific!
Bonnie
Any tips for Machu Picchu travel?
cncm
Yes! I was just there earlier this year. Are you doing the Inca Trail hike or just a day trip? I did the hike and it was amazing…highly highly recommend. I went with SAS Travel – the guides were hilarious and the food was out of this world. If not the hike, I would recommend getting there as early as you can because by 11am the place gets completely packed with people. You might consider climbing Huayna Picchu if you feel you’re up for it. There’s a separate ticket you need to buy in advance but the views from there are supposedly amazing (I didn’t do it cos I was so tired after the 4-day hike).
Other than that, I’d recommend spending 3 days in Cusco and the surrounding Sacred Valley. Loved the salt mines at Moray/Moras, the Inca ruins in Pisac, and just walking around Cusco. My favorite restaurant was Pacha Mama near the main square in Cusco. For a more upscale option, try Limo.
Enjoy! I’m so jealous. I had one of the best trips of my life in Peru and can’t wait to go back again.
Bonnie
@cncm definitely doing the hike. Did you train for it?
cncm
I did train in the 2-3 weeks leading up to it but I don’t know how much that helped given my definition of exercise was 15 minutes on an elliptical. I usually don’t exercise at all (bad, I know!). There were people of varying degrees of fitness on the trip and you can go at your own pace. There will be a guide at the back so you don’t have to worry about keeping up. The 2nd day was the most intense (those stairs!) but I actually found the 3rd day hardest as it was mostly going down and my knees were killing me by the end. All in all though, I found the hike totally do-able. Good luck!
a naan
Get a massage in Cusco! My sister and I did this after we came back from Machu Picchu (we didn’t hike the trail, but I image it’d feel even better after all that work) and it was so amazing and relaxing.
Also, I wish we had spent more time in the Sacred Valley–it is just gorgeous. Have fun!
Anonymous
Can anyone recommend a good recipe (or overall meal, actually, can be several different dishes) that uses the following spices: saffron, ceylon cinnamon, cardamom and cloves?
I’m giving someone a spice rack as a bit of an “experience gift” (eg, the spice rack and a “let’s cook a meal together!” gift) and threw a few nicer spices into the rack that it would be fun to try to use in whatever meal we cook.
Em
I’ve made this and it’s excellent: http://www.seriouseats.com/recipes/2013/05/vegetable-biryani-from-river-cottage-veg.html
BB
Biryani. Most biryanis will use pretty much all those spices – I’m partial to the Hyderabadi style ones myself.
cavity maker
rice pudding with those spices would be lovely!
Anonymous
I don’t have any recipes I love for these, but-
samosas, veggie briyani with saffron rice, baklava?
That’s a seriously awesome gift.
Cimorene
For AIMS – I had posted a shopping TJ a week or so ago and you recommended a white blouse from NM lastcall. It arrived yesterday and is perfect for what I was envisioning. Thanks again! I only wish it came in a zillion more colors!
Shopping challenge
I need some help finding something which is incredibly basic and yet apparently impossible to find: a 3.5-inch black almond-toe pump in calfskin (not patent) leather. In other words, the most basic pump there is. I want something high-quality — $200-$300. LK Bennett used to make something that fit the bill (the Shiloh pump, I believe) but they are sold out, and have been for a while.
But alas — such a thing is nowhere to be found. Everything is either pointy toe, patent leather, too short, too tall, too expensive, too cheap. I have looked high and low, and come up empty. So, I am turning to you all for help. Thank you in advance!
Carrie...
I’d check stuart weitzman. This one has a platform, but heel + platform = your 3.5 inch ideal height. I find this combo easier to walk in, but you may be more adept than me. It’s a little pricey though, but you could wait for sales.
http://shop.nordstrom.com/s/stuart-weitzman-blog-platform-pump/3158459?origin=PredictiveSearch-personalizedsort&contextualcategoryid=0&fashionColor=BLACK&resultback=1488&cm_sp=personalizedsort-_-searchresults-_-1_5_C
It sounds like this shoe slips for some on the reviews, but often you can add a little padding as needed.
Julia
I second stuart weitzman; high quality, comfy, well made, stylish.
Anonymous
Love SW heels! Totally worth the price, especially if you buy a classic pair. They last really well too.
Anon
I don’t know if Corso Como Del is high enough quality, but I saw something similar (conducting the same search myself after realizing the Shiloh was sold out. . .) on zappos.
cavity maker
check Rulala, I just saw a ton of pumps on sale. Right price point.
Bonnie
These Geox seem close to your specifications: http://shop.nordstrom.com/s/geox-marie-pump/3718618?cm_cat=datafeed&cm_ite=geox_'marie'_pump:471259&cm_pla=shoes:women:pumps&cm_ven=Linkshare&siteId=J84DHJLQkR4-0Qv38PFlxyyaft46f2WRXw
Anon
Why do you want the most boring shoe on the planet?
Anonymous
Step it up anon. If you’re going to post judgy fashion comments at least do it via the persona of Miranda Priestly.
Miranda P/Anna A
Oh that is too good! Next time :)
NYNY
These Cole Haans look like they meet your specs: http://www.zappos.com/cole-haan-bethany-pump-85-black
AMB
I just got these and love them!
Miss Behaved
PSA. TJMaxx has some great stuff right now. I just bought a gorgeous deep purple merino cowl neck sweater dress for $49.
MustangSally
I could use some advice on packing/surviving a month long trial that is out of town. I’m a senior associate that will be mostly offering support to the managing partner of our firm and other national counsel. I have second chaired two trials, but they have been relatively brief and close to home. This case is in federal court. How many suits should I plan to take with me? I am thinking of taking a handful of suits and switching blouses. Is it safe to actually use the dry cleaning service offering by the hotel, if needed? I travel a good bit for work, but I’m usually home after a week of travel. I have tried googling this topic and found nothing. I welcome any advice!
Julia
You probably should be able to trust the dry cleaning service at your hotel, but I had a pair of pants ruined at a hotel and have never trusted them since. Do you have any non iron shirts? They’re my go to for travel. Or silk or cashmere shells. You can usually wear them more than once. I would say 3-4 suits would be good, and a blazer and pants if you can wear other than a suit. I usually try to base my travel wardrobe around either navy or black, ( one or the other) so that it’s easy for accessories. Same with jewelry, either bold or silver.
anon2b
The blogger roadwarior@tt@ (replace the @ sign with the letter e) did a post in March of this year on long-term trips.