Tuesday’s TPS Report: ‘Dicaila’ Stretch Wool Sheath Dress

128 Comments

1. This is a pretty dress! Yesterday, people were writing how they’d wear a jacket over a sleeveless dress at work, but ditch the jacket for going out after. But what do you wear when you *are* going out?

   I have a work trip coming up where there will be a trips to nightclubs. In Miami Beach. [I am not about the clubbing, but will put in a good appearance and be on good behavior.]

   What does one wear to clubs these days (with the caveat that I will be seen by peers and hated rivals, so do not want to appear foolish or mutton-dressed-as-lamb)? The guys will be in suits (perhaps the juniormost and seniormost won’t be). My default would be something like DVF, maybe with higher heels than I’d normally wear. But I am older / suburban / parent of small children, so I have no idea what to wear (and most people in my industry [finance] are men, so they are of no help).

   1. I’d wear perhaps a tighter- or lower-cut than usual sheath dress, statement jewelry, and high heels.

      I’m so curious as to why you are going to nightclubs for business with peers and hated rivals though!! Is it business development (i.e., trying to get the club as a client) or entertainment? It’s just so far outside of what would happen in my biglaw office that I am weirdly fascinated.

      1. It’s a finance industry conference. At night, there are dinners and then various people rent out various clubs (for networking, meeting their clients, getting chased after by people wanting to work with them, etc.). It’s good for getting face time with people. There is a pecking order and it’s fascinating to watch. OTOH, you don’t want to make a misstep and as one of the few women (and few older women), I’m already sticking out.

         It feels a bit like sorority rush.

         1. Ah, I see – I was picturing you in a scenario where the club had its regular club-goers and you were there with a team of industry folks just kind of hanging out. I think in your case I’d go with my same answer but maybe add in a blazer to strike a bit more of a conservative tone while still looking more dressed up than your usual workday attire.

            1. Oy. Disagree – it’s Miami. No one wears blazers there at all; much less to a club! I’d wear a cute dress that’s a little shorter or tighter than you’d wear to your office, plus strappy shoes and great jewelry.

         2. I’m in a completely different industry (technology), but have been to similar kinds of events (industry conference with the post-dinner parties you describe).

            In general, I’d say that you won’t find people going to the rented out clubs dressed for the club.
            If only for logistics (long days where people have little or no down time to change after the full day, dinner, etc), most people will wear the same thing they wore during the day.

            In my industry, I will see guys ditch the jacket and tie (although few wear ties in the first place), but they are still there with their dress shirt/pants (and laptop case sometimes!)
            For the women, I’d take the same approach — wear a sheath dress that looks good on its own, with nice shoes (but something practical enough you can wear all day). Undo your hair, or touch up your makeup (more eyemakeup) if you feel the need for something more ‘let loose’

            And, if its with my industry peers, I’d rather veer on the side of looking professional than club-ish, as I’m clearly in the mode of “I-take-my-career-seriously” not “I’m-here-to-party”.

            1. +1.

            2. +1. I’m in the finance industry, attend these types of events, and we usually go out in what we wore to the evening cocktail receptions – which may be what we wore during the day. I might change into a black dress or something more cocktail to go out, but I still don’t do materially tighter, shorter, clubbier clothes. And it is noticed when women do.

            3. +1 Just came from one – I’m in finance also. Women who got changed into anything different than what they wore during the day had negative attention.

            4. Agreed. Yesterday Kat posted a sheath dress type that I would suggest. Not my normal black or grey but a fun color or details, statement neckless and or earrings clutch and party heels.

         3. I occasionally have to go to nightclubs at work events (ugh) and I think your idea is fine – a wrap dress or a sheath dress is a good choice. You could also maybe do a ponte pencil skirt with a blouse tucked in. Try to look chic, don’t worry about looking like you’re going to the club. Depending on the club, they may just rent out a vip section of it, so there will be regular club-goers sectioned off and you will still have to abide by the dress code to be let in, but as a woman it really doesn’t matter unless you’re attempting to wear pajamas or something clearly inappropriate. These things are just an excuse for heavy drinking. Sometimes in appropriate advances are made. People make friends and win business.

         4. Yeah, I have this exact same issue, I laughed so hard at colleagues “and hated rivals”, LOL.

            I’d wear a dress with a nice necklace and high heels too in the situation you are describing.

            Sometimes my firm will rent out a space and therefore it is more business casual, in which case I wear high end jeans, a lower than usual cut top and an edgy jacket with high heeled booties.

      2. Sometimes, we have company retreats where a part of a nightclub is reserved for the company.
         Sometimes another company would be holding their meeting in the same resort or hotel.
         Open bar, awkward dancing and Houda hiding in a corner counting how long to hold on before sneaking out.

   2. I am trying mightily to understand a scenario in which I would be clubbing with hated rivals. I do not envy you either part of that.

      ETA: Miami = humidity = frizzy hair. Best way I’ve found to keep my hair sleek in that soup is to dry it straight and then flat iron it and then spray it. Drying it straight and spraying is easy enough and I do it every day, but unless you use the flat iron, it all goes to poof the minute you hit the humidity. The flat ironing really helps with the humidity. And one thing I would definitely want if I were clubbing with hated rivals would be good hair.

      1. Why not just style it curly with product and air-dry? I have found less frizz that way than if you try to fight it and go straight.

         1. You make a good point, but from the perspective with hair that can be very frizzy in humidity, but is only somewhat wavy, this approach is risky. Sometimes my hair looks great air-dried curly, sometimes it looks like a rat’s nest. It never looks like “evening” hair. This would be a risky move for me.

      2. Thanks for the concern re my hair. Yes, it is always good to have good hair. I may be the one person on the planet who does better in very hot and humid environments. My hair is usually pretty flat and limp — horrible, horrible hair. But in a steam room, some texture gets coaxed out of it and it is usually very pretty.

         Is it wrong to think that I could move to New Orleans or Miami b/c my hair would be better there? Mobile?

         1. It’s funny, I lived in Miami for three years, and that was the best my hair and skin ever looked. I have had acne my entire life, sweating non stop somehow was better for it. Moved back up north and the dry winter air kills me!

            1. Maybe you should get a humidifier!

         2. Bluebell, AL? (Where is Zora?)

            1. But not Fillmore!

   3. What about the Express Editor pant suit? It is tighter and cut more modern/young/stylish. I had to go to one work night club event at old job. I wore the black editor suit with a purple cowl neck shell that was sleeveless and had narrow straps but wide enough to hide bra straps. I kept the jacket off for the day events and took it off for the club events.

   4. I am of no help but your post made me laugh and this is the exact kind of work scenario that would give me heart palpitations. Good luck! (And keep that sense of humor about the whole thing. Perhaps you’ll get some good war stories out of this?)

   5. What you’ve suggested (DVF and high heels) sounds perfect.

2. I need some advice ladies – I’m going on a business trip to South America. Should I stick to my normal business attire of dresses/skirts and blazers? More casual or more formal? I usually wear pumps – is that still appropriate or should I wear flats?

   I may be overthinking this but this is my first international business trip. Thanks ladies!

   1. Where in South America?

      1. Chile and Argentina.

         1. BA has a very European feel and the women tend to dress fairly feminine but not overly formal. Some parts of the city have lots of cobblestones so I’d recommend bringing flats and following suit.

         2. What field? If law, I would wear suits and heels (though bring flats, if you’d rather). My experience was that it was very formal in a business setting but that women had a bit more leeway than men (though that usually translated into dressing a bit more feminine than I would in a US office). So suits with skirts would work well but wouldn’t necessarily be required. I would feel underdressed in anything less in law/finance/anything corporate.

            If you’re out of that context, you could go a bit more casual (dressy but not necessarily suits).

            1. +1 to this. Adding somewhat more/larger jewelry might be good, but I’d stick to business attire if in a formal business setting.

         3. Most professional women in South American tend toward suits, albeit a bit tighter and shorter than I would wear in the United States. A sheath dress or nice separates would also be fine, but in conservative industries (banking, finance, law, consulting, government) I would avoid cardigans. Also, hose, unless they make you so uncomfortable it’s distracting.

   2. My experience (now a little outdated) was that women in Chile and Argentina dressed quite beautifully and formally, but not conservatively. So for example, women would wear suits, but the suit might be a little bit tighter or shorter than I would wear for a “business formal” event. I’d bring suits and heels, but you might also want to bring blingier jewelry or brighter print tops or lower-cut blouses. (As your comfort level dictates, of course.)

3. Repost from yesterday since I posted so late: There are a couple of calf hair belts from jcrew that I love, but I’m having a difficult time getting a sense of how delicate/durable the material is. One of you ladies suggested that it probably correlates with the quality/price of the brand, and that you probably get what you pay for. Has this been the experience of others? For reference, the belts I’m looking at are in the $70-80 range.

   1. I actually have a couple calf hair belts from J Crew, and they have held up fairly well. I think both are a few years old now and I wear them a few times a month. There is definitely a little wear on the spot the buckle normally rests, but they haven’t been banished to non-work attire yet.

      One note: when I bought the belts, one broke almost immediately. J Crew replaced it for me, and the other one is just fine. I think I just got unlucky with a defect at first.

4. A big THANK YOU to whomever recommended Caroline Hirons last week! I was not the OP but found her cheat sheets incredibly useful. It’s been less than a week and my skin is already glowing! Yowzas! Thanks!

   1. Yay! I love this black dress–is this the same one as you showed yesterday, Kat?

      As for the OP, I am very happy for you, tho I did NOT post the sugestion. Kudo’s to you for findeing a solution to your scratching probelem’s. I know when I itched and it was the bedding, I immedieately gave away my down comfoter to the Salvation Army and got a hyperallergnic one. Now I have no problemes and it is free of all the schmutz that Alan put on it (tho I did have it dry cleaned b/f I gave it away b/c it was smelley from Alan and his b.o. — FOOEY!)

      We watched the football game with Myrna’s freind’s. They were kind of strange. One guy kept stareing at me and the other one kept itcheing his private part’s. GROSS! It is VERY dificult to find good men, especialy those that are smart and handsome and have good job’s and want to marry sucessful women like me. Usueally, the men I meet are not that smart or handsome, tho some have good job’s, but hardley any want to marry me unless they are really schlubby and do NOT have good jobs. Is it that dificult to find a winner? I do not think so b/c there are alot of women less pretty and smart then me who have already snared good men. Sureley there must be a few left out there, like me, who want to marry a beautiful, sucesful lawyer (and NOW a partner also) who want’s to have kid’s RIGHT AWAY? I can NOT be the onley one like this and there should be ONE decent guy for me, right?

      Hive, I need hug’s on this b/c it is comeing up on the holiday’s and I will have to go home to Grandma Leyeh and Grandma Trudy w/o even being abel to say I have a boyfreind! DOUBEL FOOEY!

      If anyone in the HIVE has any tip’s for me, I am all ear’s! YAY!!!!!!!

   2. I missed it. What is this?

   3. Which cheat sheets have you used? I’m at a loss where to start.

      1. I read through them all, but follow the “routines” one, keeping in mind things I read in the other ones that are specific to my skin.

      2. I’m a little at a loss as well, because I have done very little spending on my skin care in the past. I think I’m realizing that it really could be improved, but don’t have an unlimited budget to blow. If you ladies were starting with basically nothing (I have Clinique cleanser, Clinique moisturizer, and a mix of castor/sunflower oil) what would you buy with $100-$200?

         1. Caroline talks about budget a lot but her basic principle is to put money into serums because they are where the magic happens.

5. Sick and tired of my ugly oh-so-functional big black laptop business case. And my shoulder hurts! I have a super-long subway commute (including changing trains, several flights of stairs and 30 minutes of walking), a zillion of in-house meetings and travel a lot for business – and need to schlep my laptop around ALL the time.

   For the past years, I´ve thrown the laptop plus bare neccessities (wallet, keys, phone, badge, makeup, water, heels, umbrella) into one big bag (first the L&S OG & now a leather business bag). Our office has one of these silly hot-desking/ mobile desk policy and no cabinets or the like, so storing heels and anything personal in the office is not an option.

   My really nice mid-size purses are currently collecting dust in the closet. So I´m thinking about carrying the laptop in a “little sleeve with handles/ strap”, and my personal stuff in a separate purse. This would have the added benefit of distributing the weight to both hands/ shoulders. When traveling, I could slip the laptop with its sleeve into the front pocket of the carry-on to meet the “1 piece of carry-on only” airline restrictions. Or throw laptop & personal stuff into a big tote for in-house meetings requiring me to bring lots of files.

   Any suggestions on where to find a high-quality, sophisticated-looking professional yet feminine laptop “sleeve” with handles/straps?

   1. Kate Spade.

      1. I have a kate spade laptop sleeve and it was great when I was studying for the bar (living in NJ and taking classes/studying in NY). I fit my laptop, charger, a slim notebook/binder, and a slim pencil case. There’s definitely enough room for a few files, wallet, etc. even with the slim profile. And mine had both handles and an adjustable shoulder strap.

   2. YMMV, but I always carry my purse in one hand and my work tote in the other hand. Nothing goes on my shoulders and it is nice and balanced.

      For laptop sleeves, I like this yellow one:
      http://vip.zappos.com/crumpler-the-wren-15-laptop-portfolio-sand

      1. I think she needs a hand free to swipe her subway card.

         1. If I need a free hand, I just move both bags into one hand or over one arm, and then move them back. I feel better with bags in-hand rather than on-shoulder.

   3. I have a quilted one from Knomo that I really like. I wish there was a tiny bit of padding on the strap but it does look pretty sleek.

   4. I use the Tumi Macon laptop carrier, love it.

6. I own this dress in navy and white, and it is a WORKHORSE.

   Great cut and fit ( I am an hourglass) and machine washable. I wear it once a week atleast.

7. Hello, I am planning a trip to Maui for mid-Oct.
   Any recs for lodging, food, must sees?
   It’ll be DH and me, no kids. Mid-range budget.
   TIA!

   1. Hailemaile General Store (nice meal), Paia Fish Market (delicious lunch/casual meal), Haleakala (really cool volcano), poke (pronounced poh-kay) all the time.

      If you do the road to Hana, I highly recommend doing the backside instead of going back the way you came.

      1. If you can swing it, stay at the Ritz Carlton. When we booked it was not one of the most expensive hotels on the island – more mid-price than the super pricey hotels in Wailea. Because of its location, I think it gets overlooked, but MY GOODNESS what a gorgeous, relaxing, servicey, wonderful hotel. Expansive grounds, excellent housekeeping, free shuttle all around Kapalua, few kids, amazing spa. Perfect, perfect, perfect. 15 minute drive from the action of Kaanapali-close enough to be convenient and far enough to be secluded. A couple of cute places on site/walking distance, a wine bar, sushi restaurant, general store. I can’t speak highly enough of this place.

         Other stuff – Mamas Fish House (not near much, but we did it just before leaving because it’s near the airport). Kapalua coastal trail – pick it up behind the Ritz. Several secluded beaches and beautiful scenery. The Gazebo (also in Kapalua) for local-style breakfast. Star Noodle. Warren & Annabelle’s magic show (I hate magic, and that was really fun!). Try paddleboarding.

         Maui was truly the perfect vacation. Have a great time.

   2. Bike down Haleakala (volcano), it was one of the best experiences of my life (and I did it when I was 12 but people of all ages were doing it). Also whale watching, we had a humpback literally swim right up to our boat, it was amazing.

      1. Haha. I biked it as a 29 yo and even though I am comfortable biking in the city (NYC), biking down a volcano was a whole ‘nother matter. It was fun, but you have to balance it with the fact that the sunrise bike tours start at 3AM (to get everyone geared up and to the top).

   3. I stayed at the Grand Wailea and loved it. They have amazing pools and a great spa– even if you don’t stay there, I would try to do a treatment there. The hotel price wasn’t too bad but they racked up the proce of sunscreen, food and drinks.

      We decided not to do the bike down Haleakala because it looked terrifying (and I’m a very experienced biker who rides the streets in my city). We rode horses down the volcano instead.

      We did a hiking and Road to Hana trip through Hike Maui and would book with them again in a second. The drive around Hana was really pretty terrifying and it was nice to have someone who knew what they were doing behind the wheel.

      We went snorkeling through Pacific Whale Foundation, which was excellent and the money went towards conservation.

      The magic show in Lahaina is supposed to be amazing. I didn’t do it but if we had stayed longer it was on our list.

      Restaurants: Spago, Mamas Fish house, and Lahaina Grill were all amazing, although I don’t think we are a single and meal there. If you go to restaurants on the water try to book for 6ish and you’ll catch the sunset. If you’re on the east coast, I recommend not trying to totally adjust to the time zones (if you’re on west coast, don’t adjust at all). We transitioned to California time and it was perfect– we could eat at sunset and be up early for so many of the activities that started super early. If you plan to do Haleakala at sunrise, for example, plan to do it early in the trip so it won’t seem as much like you’re waking up at 3 am.

      H

      1. I had almost exactly these experiences in Maui. Double the recommendations for Grand Wailea (they also have attached condos, so you can house a family and enjoy the pools, but avoid the rest of the prices if too high), and for Mama’s Fish House. Even the tomato-ginger soup they give you to start off was delicious!

   4. Hotels are probably reasonable in October but if for some reason you want a condo, we stayed at Koa Lagoon and loved it (and it was very cheap).
      A Molokini snorkeling trip is a must. We went with Trilogy and had a great experience.
      And I second Mamas Fish House – one of the best meals of my life (and I live in an area that is famous for good food).

   5. Check out the book Maui Revealed. If you Google it, it brings up the website hawaiirevealed dot com and I think there is an app you can also use. Lots of good tips for sightseeing, food, hotels. Road to Hana and Haleakala are not to be missed.

   6. Google Maui and Sunset Magazine–they did a whole issue on the island in the last year. Their website search is a little annoying so search through the Goog.

      1. Thanks for the helpful suggestions, ladies!!
         Much appreciated.

         OP

8. I’d like to purchase one or two cardigans this fall. I’ve gotten a couple from Lands End and Talbots but they tend to fit kind of boxy. What are your favorites?

   1. Uniqlo’s merino cardigans are not boxy, but they tend to run small and are not a good option if you’re busty. They’re inexpensive and DO NOT look like they ARE expensive, but they don’t look cheap, either.

   2. I love Boden’s cropped crew neck cardigan. The length is very flattering (it hits right at the waist). Not boxy at all. Looks especially good with dresses.

   3. The Jcrew Jackie is my cardigan staple. I’ve stopped buying most Jcrew stuff because of quality, but the Jackie and casual day dresses on sale will still get my money. Sad to see they don’t have the Jackie in as many colors right now though–I love grabbing the random ones on sale to brighten up black sheaths!

9. I understand the recruiter is paid by the company and the company is the recruiter’s client. But I still got a job thanks to his help. Do I, as an unemployed person, get the recruiter a gift when I accept an offer? If so- what?

   The recruiter is not a close friend but is within the family social network, if that makes sense. It’s a mid-to-upper-career 6figure salary job.

   1. No gift necessary. This is their job. However, if they did good work and it is appropriate to do so, mention their name if asked for a recruiter referral.

   2. I’d say no to the gift. As grateful are you are, the recruiter was doing their job (and not a favor). They got you in the door, but you got the job.

      Offer to point the recruiter in the direction of good candidates the next time s/he has an opening you can help with?

   3. I agree no gift is necessary. But a handwritten note of thanks is always nice.

   4. I had a couple dozen cupcakes delivered to my recruiter’s office (small firm, about 15 recruiters) from Sprinkles after I started at my new job. Seemed to be well-received and while I know it wasn’t necessary, I was really thankful at how helpful my recruiter was in transitioning me to the new gig.

   5. You could offer to write a recommendation on his LinkedIn page.

      1. +1 and refer all your friends/colleagues who are good candidates to him.

   6. While it’s not necessary, it’s still nice. My vote is to always do things that are nice if you can & there’s nothing inappropriate about doing that here.

10. Scandal collection for Limited is up. Can anyone give me an idea of Limited sizing – perhaps in relation to, say, jcrew?

    1. In limited skirts, I wear my typical size. In JCrew skirts, I wear one size down. (I think JCrew has done more vanity sizing.)

    2. I love this dress: http://www.thelimited.com/product/tulip-skirt-sheath-dress/20068945.html?dwvar_20068945_colorCode=897&prefn1=saleStatus&ppid=c15&start=15&cgid=scandal-collection-inspired-by-kerry-washington&swatch=y&prefv1=regular

       But I am totally waiting for it to go on sale. haha

       1. I ordered that dress – too scared it will sell out to wait for a sale!

          As for fit, I popped in a store this past weekend to try a dress from The Limited on so I would know what size to buy today. I ordered one size down from my normal size, though in JCrew I take my normal size in dresses. In JCrew pants I do size down. But I ordered my normal size in pants from The Limited – not sure whether that was the right call or not.

       2. I love that, but ugh don’t you think it’s a bit short in the front?

          AHHH but it’s sage green….

    3. I love most of that collection. But yeah, not buying any of it until it’s on sale.

    4. These images are so photoshopped, its laughable. They look like cartoon clothes, completely free from wrinkles. They also look like they are made from really cheap fabrics, which may be why all the photoshopping.

11. Has anyone ordered the Clare cardigan from J Crew Factory? How does it compare to the Jackie?

    1. Yes. The quality of the material is significantly inferior – it feels almost like t-shirt material. That said, I like the fit.

       1. There is no structure, specifically between the buttons – they sort of all elastic-ed together. It’s a weird thing to comment on, I know, but until you see it you might not know what I mean. But, because of this, mine looked frumpy very quickly. Bottom line is I am not buying another one of those again – get what you pay for.

12. Career advice needed: I have a great job that I really enjoy. But it sounds like after about 6 months of stress and transition, we’re gearing up for another year of the same. I’ve been at this job for just over 3 years and was recently promoted so while there may be some advancement opportunities as all this change shakes out, I’m inclined to stay in my current position and learn. I know we’ve talked about leaning in and potentially leaning out, but is there a strategic way to stay the current course, knowing that I will want to pursue opportunities once I have more experience?

    1. This sounds like leaning in, to me.

       1. I agree with this. If you’re interested in learning more in your current position, there’s nothing wrong with staying there and taking every opportunity you can within the role (including some stretch opportunities) to learn and challenge yourself. Leaning in in your current position, that is. Then apply for a promotion when you’re ready. If you have a good relationship with your manager, you could talk sometime about wanting to get really really really good at your current role with an eye on moving up, then ask Manager for feedback on your plan or if there are any specific steps she would recommend. The goal of the conversation is twofold: Get good advice, and let her know you’re interested in moving up but you want to get really really really good at your current role as well.

          1. Thanks for the input. I was worried that my plan was going to be too passive but it sounds like I’m over-thinking things.

             1. Definitely not too passive. It can be wise and show maturity to know that you have some things to learn before moving up the ladder.

    2. Been there. It’s frustrating but I have learned a ton. Good luck, whatever you decide!

13. Has anyone tried laser treatments for toenail fungus? I am tempted by a medspa groupon in my area, but I’m wondering how well it really works.

    1. I have extremely resistent toenail fungus. I did a round of laser treatment about 4-5 years ago. There has not been fungus visible in a few years, but I am not sure that the fungal infection is gone. I still do not get pedicures or polish my toenails for fear that any substance on them may bring the fungus back with a vengeance.

       Have you tried a prooduct with tolnaftate? I tried every product on the market for years. Tonaftate based products were the only thing that made any difference. Ther are several generic type low cost tolnaftate products, in the $10-15 range, available at drug stores.

       1. I tried a paint-on product from my podiatrist’s office, can’t remember what it was called now. Something with a 3 in it. Over 6 months, I saw perhaps minimal improvement in 1 or 2 nails. I’ll track it down and see if it was a tolnaftate product. If not, I’ll look for something at the drugstore. Thanks for the tip!

    2. In drugstore temporary cures, I have had luck with full -strength tea oil and also mentholatum (like vicks rub). I keep my toes painted in the summer, but this keeps them clear in cold weather.

    3. I used Tineacide, which is OTC but you have to ask for it at the pharmacy. I went to a real podiatrist, and he told me to use a nail file to make my nail bed thinner. I put it on every day, twice a day, and my podiatrist told me it’d take about six months to work. I also trim the nail that’s infected as much as I can–get the bad stuff out of there. Then he had me take ALL of my shoes and spray them with a diluted isoproyl spray (and let them dry for a few days). He explained that I was likely reinfecting myself by wearing infected shoes. I am super careful about making sure my feet are dry before I put on shoes or socks or tights. It’s been about a year, and my podiatrist was right–Tineacide worked! Huge fan.

       He also told me that the laser stuff is not that effective…I was better off using the Tineacide. Of course, YMMV, but that’s what a doc told me!

    4. I used a groupon for an independent podiatrist, and it was worthless. It didn’t make a difference. TBH, I’m pretty sure that they did a groupon because it was a new machine for the office and they wanted to test it out and get down their procedures on test patients before rolling out to real, paying customers. They didn’t seem to know what they were doing, no one could answer basic questions, the aftercare instructions were vague and late, and I’m truly not convinced they had the laser calibrated correctly.

       I would consider it again because I know someone personally for whom it worked, but I’m not going to do a groupon again. I’ll go to someone experienced with demonstrated success even though it will cost significantly more.

    5. Talk to your GP at your next check up – mine gave me a prescription (I don’t remember what for, it was when I was swimming back in high school) that worked like a charm.

14. 45 degrees this morning where I live, so I am officially out of Bare Legs Season. Brrrr.

    1. Still in bare legs, but I brought out the trench coat today. It’s the Autumn Equinox, so I’m ok with this.

       I think it would be fun to celebrate non-religious holidays like the equinoxes and solstices. Does anyone have any Autumn Equinox traditions they enjoy?

       1. The only thing that excites me about changing seasons is food (unless it’s spring/summer and then actual nice weather). So to mark the transitions I like to cook seasonally appropriate meals. E.g., you could do something with butternut squash for fall (butternut squash tacos? ravioli?); a hearty chili for winter; a pasta primavera for spring and, say, strawberry shortcake and rhubarb pie for summer.

          I was also thinking that I am really craving soups now that it’s getting colder so I think I will be making a lot of soups over the next few weekends. You could also go apple picking and then make lots of apple deserts because you have to use up all those apples somehow.

          1. AIMS, you’re making me hungry. I think I should go to lunch.

             Incidentally, I brought corn pudding baked in acorn squash today, so yay! That fits perfectly!

             1. That sounds awesome… Recipe?

             2. http://www.101cookbooks.com/archives/roasted-corn-pudding-in-acorn-squash-recipe.html

                I subbed fennel for the anise. A bit different, very good!

          2. I made apple crisp over the weekend and now I really want soup. I see apple butternut squash soup in my future. Fall is my favorite season by far. I’ve been burning my fall scented candles for weeks trying to will the summer away and I can’t wait to go apple picking.

       2. Well… I am not really Jewish but for many reasons I’ve adopted the high holidays, Rosh Hashanah specifically, as my sort of totemic favorite celebration of the year. My birthday usually falls just a few weeks earlier, for one….

       3. Actually, I think the Autumn Equinox is celebrated as a Wiccan holiday.

    2. Eh – that’s the morning. It’ll be high 60s, low 70s by the afternoon. :)

15. Posting here rather than on the Moms site for non-mom opinions. I can’t decide whether or not to invite a two work colleagues to my baby shower. Both are work friends who I see in person 1 – 2 times per month, but never outside of work in just a social setting. One is older with high school/college-aged kids; the other is my age and single with no kids. I don’t want to seem like I’m grabby for gifts – I genuinely like each of these ladies and enjoy their company. They’ve both been very considerate and interested in my pregnancy, but I don’t know if a shower invite is a step too far (or just the right next step for the friendship). Thoughts?

    1. Do they know each other? I would feel uncomfortable going to a baby shower with lots of family and friends unless there were other people I knew and could socialize with. If they will know others in attendance, fine. Otherwise, maybe invite them to lunch with you one day to further the friendship?

    2. If you only see them 1-2 times a month and have never socialized with them outside of work, I don’t think they would be close enough friends to invite to a baby shower.

    3. Maybe I’m in the wrong social circles but I don’t think baby shower gifts are so expensive that an invite would seem gift grabby.

       1. Right? I don’t think anyone is going to think you invited them because you really, really wanted two extra onesies, a plush lion, and a copy of Pat the Bunny.

          1. hehehehehehehe

    4. Nope, no work people at the regular shower, particularly if you only see them once a month. It is possible/likely that work will throw you a shower, and they would come to that.

       1. I disagree. I think its fine to invite these two work ladies. it sounds like you would genuinely like to have them there. The only caveat is if you know you are getting a shower thrown by work folks.

    5. agreeing with above ladies. Also, I am one of those people who would be relieved NOT to receive an invite in these circumstances – sometimes, an afternoon of small talk with people you’ll probably not see again (assuming these are the only coworkers who would be invited) just isn’t that fun.

    6. Make sure to have a lunch with them on your maternity leave, bring the baby when it’s sleeping. That will up your friendship to the next level and keep you up on the company biz. And show-off the new baby!

    7. I really hate that the “gift grab” concept seems to stop people from inviting people to things. I would always err on the side of extending an invitation as I think there are far more hurt feelings that come from not being included than from being invited to an event that’s associated with gifts.

    8. Have you ever gone out to lunch/happy hour/dinner/etc with them? If yes, invite. If not, I’d avoid.

    9. I love parties, so if it was me, I would welcome the invitation. I would use this test: would you feel awkard telling them about the party later? Would you have that, “oh, I should have invited you?” feeling? If so, then invite.

       1. Great rule of thumb- thanks! I’m going to send them both invites now.

       2. +1

16. Hello all,

    I would like to give a friend a personalized nameplate. She is a therapist with a home office separate but attached to her house; patients enter through the side door, where she just has her name and degrees tacked up on a piece of paper in the window for convenience. I’m thinking bronze, to be mounted on the door. Any ideas where I can get this done well and delivered within six weeks?

    Thanks!!

    1. Etsy. Do you know she wants that?

       1. Thank you! And yes, double checked with her husband!

    2. This sounds like one of the companies featured in Skymall – I remember seeing one with a huge variety of address/name options.

17. To answer your question to the plus size readers, I get wool suiting separates from Talbots (although I’ve found nothing there in years–it used to be my easy go to, but now the sizing and quality are all off and it’s mostly miss for me) or Lafayette 148. I love the latter–it’s a beautiful, high quality fabric and construction–but the cost is on the high end for me. I have some luck with Jones New York, although the fabrics are increasingly less quality. I also really love Nordstrom line Sejour, but it’s not really wool.

    For a brief, shining year or two, Brooks Brothers had a plus size line, and I still love the suits I bought then. Those and old Talbots are my standbys, with new Lafayette 148, JNY, and Sejour stuff mixed in.

18. If my state bar doesnt require CLEs there’s no reason to turn in my bar # if I attend an event with CLE credits, right?

19. Flash 50% off at Macys. Now, Kat, please get my fall holiday comment from earlier out of moderation. Sheesh.

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