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Our daily workwear reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices.
The Banana Republic Factory shop is one of my favorite spots for inexpensive work tops. In the Before Times, I would try always offer to cover out-of-town depositions or court conferences where I could conveniently make a detour to an outlet mall on my way home. Now that we’re doing a lot of that stuff by videoconference, my only consolation is that I can now do my “outlet” shopping online.
This dolman sleeve top is such a pretty print and would look great underneath a gray or navy blazer for your next Zoom court conference or meeting. (What you wear on the bottom is entirely up to you!)
The top is $27.49 at Banana Republic Factory and comes in sizes XXS–XXL.
This post contains affiliate links and Corporette® may earn commissions for purchases made through links in this post. For more details see here. Thank you so much for your support!
Sales of note for 9.19.24
- Nordstrom – Beauty deals through September, and cardmembers earn 3x the points (ends 9/22)
- Ann Taylor – Extra 30% off sale
- Banana Republic Factory – 50% off everything + extra 20% off
- Boden – 15% off new styles
- Eloquii – Extra 50% off sale
- J.Crew – 50% off select styles — and 9/19 only, 50% off the cashmere wrap
- J.Crew Factory – Up to 60% off everything + 50% off sale with code
- Lo & Sons – Warehouse sale, up to 70% off
- M.M.LaFleur – Save 25% sitewide
- Neiman Marcus – Friends & Family 25% off
- Rag & Bone – Friends & Family 25% off sitewide
- Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
- Talbots – Anniversary event, 25% off your entire purchase — Free shipping, no minimum, 9/19 only
- Target – Car-seat trade-in event through 9/28 — bring in an old car seat to get a 20% discount on other baby/toddler stuff.
- Tuckernuck – Friends & Family Sale – get 20%-30% off orders (ends 9/19).
- White House Black Market – 40% off select styles
Sales of note for 9.19.24
- Nordstrom – Beauty deals through September, and cardmembers earn 3x the points (ends 9/22)
- Ann Taylor – Extra 30% off sale
- Banana Republic Factory – 50% off everything + extra 20% off
- Boden – 15% off new styles
- Eloquii – Extra 50% off sale
- J.Crew – 50% off select styles — and 9/19 only, 50% off the cashmere wrap
- J.Crew Factory – Up to 60% off everything + 50% off sale with code
- Lo & Sons – Warehouse sale, up to 70% off
- M.M.LaFleur – Save 25% sitewide
- Neiman Marcus – Friends & Family 25% off
- Rag & Bone – Friends & Family 25% off sitewide
- Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
- Talbots – Anniversary event, 25% off your entire purchase — Free shipping, no minimum, 9/19 only
- Target – Car-seat trade-in event through 9/28 — bring in an old car seat to get a 20% discount on other baby/toddler stuff.
- Tuckernuck – Friends & Family Sale – get 20%-30% off orders (ends 9/19).
- White House Black Market – 40% off select styles
Sales of note for 9.19.24
- Nordstrom – Beauty deals through September, and cardmembers earn 3x the points (ends 9/22)
- Ann Taylor – Extra 30% off sale
- Banana Republic Factory – 50% off everything + extra 20% off
- Boden – 15% off new styles
- Eloquii – Extra 50% off sale
- J.Crew – 50% off select styles — and 9/19 only, 50% off the cashmere wrap
- J.Crew Factory – Up to 60% off everything + 50% off sale with code
- Lo & Sons – Warehouse sale, up to 70% off
- M.M.LaFleur – Save 25% sitewide
- Neiman Marcus – Friends & Family 25% off
- Rag & Bone – Friends & Family 25% off sitewide
- Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
- Talbots – Anniversary event, 25% off your entire purchase — Free shipping, no minimum, 9/19 only
- Target – Car-seat trade-in event through 9/28 — bring in an old car seat to get a 20% discount on other baby/toddler stuff.
- Tuckernuck – Friends & Family Sale – get 20%-30% off orders (ends 9/19).
- White House Black Market – 40% off select styles
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Anon
Hello! Can someone explain to me how to wear shorts these days? I’m a thick-thighed fairly athletic pear shape and I just tried every pair of shorts in my drawer and…it’s not good. I’ve been cycling a lot lately to do errands or meet friends on a patio and would love to wear shorts and some kind of cute top but everyone I see in my downtown big city neighbourhood is in the tiniest short shorts and cropped tanks and in my mid-40s that is a look that does not resonate! Any general shorts styling advice or specific recommendations? It’s hot! I want to take my bike places and look good when I get there!
Anon
Honestly I hardly wear them – also a thick thighEd athletic pear and I’ve yet to find a pair that works for me. I mostly wear sundresses or lightweight linen pants. I bike a ton too and am fine wearing sundresses while biking. When I very occasionally wear shorts, I opt for flowy rather than the classic tailored chino shorts look.
If I’m just hanging around I’m almost always in athleisure and wear running shorts all the time.
Anonymous
Same. Skirts or dresses are fine for biking. I can’t find any dressier shorts that I like. Sometimes you can get a decent cycling or tennis specific dress that also looks cute.
Cat
partly, not GAF. But I (late 30s for reference) am most comfortable in 5″ or 7″ JCrew chinos (navy is my go-to), slouchy cut-offs (size up!), or looser linen styles with a drawstring.
I go nowhere near cropped tops even though they are on trend. I like untucked linen b,tt,n downs with the sleeves rolled up, solid color slouchy v-neck tees, and Lilly tees when I’m feeling preppy.
Elle
I have had good luck with paperbag shorts especially some linen blend ones from old navy!
Anonymous
Seconding these as another athletic pear! Although generally I just stick yo dresses because making sure shorts stay in the right place is too much hassle for me.
Anonymous
“Paper bag” means that there is a lot of fabric sticking up above the elastic waistband. Think of how a paper lunch bag looks when you grab it around the middle. These are cute on some people but require the shirt to be very cropped or tucked in and can be unflattering or annoying. Regular elastic-waist linen shorts without the paper bag waist are cute and comfy on people of every size and shape, and are a relatively current look.
PolyD
Mostly skirts and dresses (I’m probably a moderate pear). I did get some drapery shorts from Loft this summer that I like very much – they are a linen-rayon blend, I have one pair with a emulate waist and one with elastic. I like how they flow.
I also bought a skort from Talbots a moth or so ago that looks just like a skirt. It’s not super short and the shorts are snug enough to stay in place. I did go up a size (or maybe I’m just bigger than I was last time I bought bottoms from Talbots). I’m about 5’3”, about 135 lbs and bought a medium (I hover in the 4-6 range for pants depending on the brand).
Cue the people who can’t believe that people wear skorts anymore.
Anon
If wearing skorts is wrong, I don’t want to be right.
Anonymous
Same. The wicking fabric ones are amazing (incl. anything from Athleta).
ALT
Skorts are very “in” and trendy right now! Also very functional so I am allllll about a skort.
Anonymous
Not a pear but 44 and have very thick (and slightly saggy) thighs and I only am comfortable in Bermudas. And even then it isn’t that great. So I would opt for a combo of DGAF and/or just wear a skirt with bike shorts or something underneath if you like the way you look better in skirts or dresses.
Anonymous
Chub rub is a wicked thing that I didn’t have when I was younger but ruins cycling without the right bottoms. I have a pair of looser / longer shorts with built-in liners (from LL Bean, a few years ago; probably not hard to find a current version somewhere). They are game-changers. They are a bit longer and stay down. And they look like regular shorts. But are wicking and have pockets. I wouldn’t wear them generally (my go-to casual sporty shorts are North Face Aphrodite 6″ one, recommend to size up). I own no cute shorts now but do have some Lilly sporty skorts for when I want to look cute.
Monday
Same body type. Wearing shorts has been super liberating, but it took lots of trial and error.
For denim, get high waisted curvy cuts and consider sizing up, even 2+ sizes. Believe it or not, I recommend Hollister curvy shorts. I’m 39.
For athletic, I embraced bike shorts this year and DGAF. I’ve been wearing the “Balance” style from Old Navy, which is super high waisted. Caveat: no pockets.
pugsnbourbon
+1 to high waist curvy cuts. I found a pair of “mom shorts” from Levis that actually look super cute – and having a wider leg opening is clutch for me.
Monday
Yes, the leg opening! I shop on Poshmark a lot, and I had to figure out what leg opening I require for shorts and then ask every seller for the leg opening measurement before ordering. With some brands, you can size up and up and up but they never really accommodate athletic quads.
Ses
Yes, to wider leg openings! Lands end swim shorts (with built in underwear) have a curvy fit version that looks so much better on me due to more space in the rear and leg opening.
anonypotamus
The high waisted curvy cut shorts from madewell are the first ones I have ever found that fit my properly in the waist (and at my actual waist as a Very Short-Waisted lady) and were loose enough for my preference in the thighs. I went out and bought them in several colors of denim, just because they were such a unicorn. And you can roll them up if you want a short inseam or wear them longer. Highly highly recommend.
MagicUnicorn
Also a pear who hovers between size 12-14 and I have some linen elastic/paperbag/drawstring ones in XL from Old Navy from a couple summers ago and they are okay-ish enough that I don’t feel completely gross wearing them in public. They are baggy and the L would probably be a better fit, but I didn’t care enough to deal with an exchange. BUT! This past spring I got a pair of 4″ charcoal grey elastic waist shorts with a dolphin hem, also from Old Navy, but in a Tall fit (so the rise is higher and they don’t give me a wedgie). They are amazing and while I don’t see that exact pair in stock now, I am tempted to buy all the other similar options just to have on hand because I love this pair so much. Oh, and they have pockets that fit my phone and my keys and my hands, all at the same time.
Anonymous
I gave up on wearing shorts ages ago. I found it impossible to find cute tops. I’m short and every top was too long. Tucked in looked weird. Just doing a font tuck didn’t work either. I wear dresses because then I just have to worry about one piece of clothing. For biking, maybe wearing slip shorts underneath would help.
Minnie Beebe
Buy petite tops! It’s the only way that flowy tops look normal on me! (I’m short-waisted, tops almost always hit me too low on the hip)
Anonymous
Combo of DGAF, size up, appropriate length, and functionality. I focus on shorts from outdoor brands like Eddie Bauer and embrace the aesthetic.
Anon
Size 14 pear here. I love both of these so, so much. I wear an XL in both.
Columbia Women’s Sandy River Short – I have 5 colors. I wear the 5″ inseam. https://smile.amazon.com/dp/B00LGQA3HM/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_fabc_2QGM5SS54VPDBT4ZY7AV?psc=1
https://www.costco.com/nautica-ladies'-linen-blend-pull-on-short.product.100729355.html
Kate
Yes! I have two pairs, and they are great — I wrote about them in a Weekend Open Thread: https://corporette.com/weekend-open-thread-532. I like the other ones I included in the post even better!
Anonymous
I really wanted to get these and hopefully love them, but I had such a bad experience with Columbia’s customer service that it put a bad taste in my mouth. I’m trying to put my money towards brands that excel at the whole process.
Anon
This is quite a comment. There is no mass-market brand that “excels at the whole process.” You’re talking about a clothing retailer, not something personal like a hair salon, and you’re talking about minimum wage clerks who were dealing with who-knows-what in their own lives.
Anonymous
Don’t be obtuse. It is very, very easy to buy things at one brand that makes purchasing and returns painless and simple rather than a brand that makes you call five times to figure out where the heck your order (that they charged you for but never delivered) is.
Anonymous
I bought these at my local Dick’s Sporting Goods, if you want to skip ordering directly from Columbia.
Anonymous
I have a pair and love them as well!
Anonymous
I love my jeans shorts but would never, ever wear them to bike in the heat. Just the thought of that thick waistband all sweaty makes me shudder. Linen shorts or athleisure (I like Vuori, but their inseams are very short) all the way.
Erin
Also a thick-thighed pear – usually size 16 bottoms, but I size up in shorts. I prefer longer shorts/bermudas, and this summer have been living in:
– Hilary Radley bermudas from Costo (especially the seersucker ones) for more preppy outfits (I think XXL)
https://www.costco.com/hilary-radley-ladies'-bermuda-pull-on-short.product.100703251.html
-Northface Aphrodite bermudas for more casual/sporty occasions (2X)
https://www.zappos.com/p/the-north-face-aphrodite-motion-bermuda-shorts-tnf-black/product/9472594/color/259985
-Lee jean bermudas from Amazon (18)
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B074H6QXGZ/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_search_asin_title?ie=UTF8&psc=1
Anonymous
Returned from maternity leave two weeks ago and just found out my employer has not been paying me. It’s a giant famous company and I’m sure they are going to straighten this out but I feel like I’m on strike right now. Permission to do nothing until I see the money? Every email I get I just want to write back “f you pay me!”
anon
Im confused. You went a few months without getting a paycheck and didn’t notice?
Anonymous
No just the last two weeks. I got partially paid while out on leave. My leave exhausted and I returned but hr has me out on leave without pay.
anonshmanon
Why is payroll always such a shitshow?
Anon
If you are in the US, that’s how it works. I’m sorry. I thought it was crap too.
Anon
Oh sorry, just read your last comment. Ignore
Anonymous
I had an employee do this when they accidentally did not immediately get added to payroll the first week back from furlough (and then his pay check got mailed instead of direct deposited and he had moved so he didn’t get it right away). I had no idea what was going on until he announced he was on strike, so its not like there was anything I could have been doing to prevent it. So as a supervisor, I would say please do not strike before giving them a chance to fix it, especially if you have a big grant proposal due tomorrow that your supervisor is going to have to deal with personally . It’s shitty but probably an honest mistake and getting paid retroactively (e.g. every 2 weeks) is pretty much the norm anyway.
Monday
I assume OP contacted HR/Payroll immediately when she saw the pay missing. I doubt she’d be being coy about receiving her income.
Something similar happened to my SO when we came back from vacation–he discovered he was not paid for any of the time despite having formally put in for PTO and having plenty of it. They corrected it immediately, as they should. It’s kind of an emergency for most people!
Anonymous
Yeah my point is going on strike will make life difficult for the supervisor but probably not the HR person who could fix it. In my case the employee did not tell me what was going on, so I couldn’t apply pressure to HR either. (OP, if you haven’t told your supervisor what is happening, please do!) And once he did let us know and we laid down the law with HR, he still went on strike. Anyway, it did not leave me or my supervisor with a good feeling about this employee. I completely understand why he was upset, but his solution was not helpful and damaged his reputation internally.
anonshmanon
How long did it take for HR to issue the back pay? And how long was he supposed to work unpaid so as not to damage his reputation?
Op
It’s totally not my boss’s fault and I’m not doing anything that would hurt her or my company or my reputation. I’m a lawyer so I think there’s an ethical problem with really dropping the ball. I’m just kind of slacking until hr at least responds to her email and explains this.
I suspect the benefits insurer cut me off as of my first day back (aug 9) but my employer mistakenly put me as returning aug 19th (despite unlocking all my access on aug 9) because they showed me as “on leave” until yesterday per my boss.
Anonymous
We get paid weekly on Thursdays. He missed the first paycheck (HR forgot to put him back on payroll) & the second was mailed to his former address instead of direct deposited. I learned about the issue when he emailed me and my supervisor on the second Thursday to inform us that he was going on strike. So at that point he had not received pay in about 11 days, 7 days later than he would have expected. My supervisor called HR and they set up a direct deposit that would hit within 24 hours. He still refused to work until the deposit hit. To be fair, I didn’t handle it very well myself; I was just frustrated at being helpless to do anything and also tired of being short staffed. We work for a nonprofit theatre that was shut down for 18 months due to the pandemic; everyone was on furlough at some point.
OP – I’m sorry you are going through this and hope it gets resolved quickly.
Anon
They are legally obligated to cut you a check today, correct?
Anon
To be slightly more clear: they can write you a paper check today, and therefore, they should. This is what was done for me years ago when I did not receive two paychecks in a row: boss called HR, HR hand wrote checks for me, done.
Anon
Yes! Do not let them pay you later if that’s what they’re trying to do. Someone can make this happen today.
Senior Attorney
Yes and depending on the state there can be significant fines for wage and hour violations.
Anonymous
One time I didn’t get paid for 2 days of work. I didn’t notice it immediately. Once I did notice it, we were close to the next pay period so I agreed they could just put it on my next check. Well, of course, that didn’t happen. So then I said please deliver me a paper check that same day. So I vote for being on strike until you have a check in your hand.
Anonymous
Grow up.
Anon
Why should she be expected to work for free? I would fulfill exactly my ethical duty as a lawyer and otherwise, not work until I’m getting paid again. This is her company’s fault, and they should be correcting it ASAP, not dragging their feet about paying her for the work she has already done.
Anon
She is not working for free, since they WILL pay her. What kind of professional (or adult for that matter) goes on “strike” when there is a problem??!! These things happen!
Anon
Of course these things happen, and the HR people are only human! But they’ve apparently already identified and agreed there is a problem on the company’s end. The appropriate response is, “I’m so sorry! Here is your missing check!” The company she works for is also full of professionals, and those people (the ones who caused this problem) should be professional enough to fix it ASAP.
There is a reason there are laws about the timing of paychecks and levying penalties for not complying with that timing — because of course employers can always say they’re going to pay someone. She has been on maternity leave, and having to figure out how to get someone to pay her for the work she has already done is not something she should be having to stress over. Of course she can choose to agree to get the money on her next check, but she is in no way obligated to do so, because it is the company’s responsibility to ensure that its workers are paid.
I cannot walk out of a grocery store with a bag of avocados because I left my wallet at home and assure them that I will be back later to pay them! Her labor is valuable as well.
Just Tired
Well that was kind and helpful. I suppose you work for free or would not be annoyed at all to be working for en employer who could not be bothered to pay you?
anon
My state has a statute mandating specific penalties if a paycheck is late (as defined by statute). If I was especially annoyed at my employer and worked at a large company, I might remind them to also pay me the late check penalties.
anne-on
Payroll/HR is a total nightmare at SO many places. When I left my job at an accounting firm (!!) they kept paying me for a month. I stuck the cash in a savings account because I knew it was a mistake but the amount of times I had to call THEM to ask them to stop paying me and then get details for how to send it back was frankly insane.
Anon in the Heartland
Usually a lurker, but I need the wisdom of the hive! I live in the heartland in a state you might have seen come across the AP wire recently. Our school district has decided to modify a mandate from our county to allow mask exemption forms to be signed by parents instead of physicians. This has led to widespread exemptions. The district has NO other mitigations in place. A group of parents wants to fight this legally, but they are not lawyers and have no idea where to start. They have called and talked to a couple of lawyers locally who said they need a plaintiff’s attorney from a larger firm… do they just go down the proverbial phone book?! Time is of the essence before the board passes more protections for themselves. Thank you for any guidance you may be able to offer.
Anonymous
I would take a look at the Alabama parent lawsuit over masks to see what the parents’ argument was and what kind of attorneys they had.
Anonymous
Sorry, Arkansas.
Anonymous
If you post the actual state then someone on this board might know someone who can help.
Anon in the Heartland
Kansas
Anonymous
Do you go back after labor day? You’re starting to have a month of data from Georgia. Google Union Academy (or maybe Union Charter school — it’s a charter school so they can make and then fix their own rules)(in NC outside of Charlotte). Started without a mandate and had tons of people out almost immediately either sick (fewer) or quarantining (tons more), which was quickly disruptive (think: how many subs are there? how will they deal with always having 5-10 kids in a class out and then having to catch up?).
Anon in the Heartland
We are already back. Day 3 of school, and I’m taking my symptomatic kid to be tested.
anon for this
You might start by reaching out to someone at KU Law School to see if they have any ideas — whether their clinic could support, or if there’s a professor who can help guide you. Start with Guy Collier or Bruce Hopkins.
KP
Boden
Anon
Consider calling your state ACLU chapter – they may have referrals
Anon
I’d love to build a capsule wardrobe for work: I’m in the NE so I will plan on a summer one and a winter one? My commute is a 1.5 mile walk or bike (which I do in all weather) and I’m in the office 3-4 days a week. My office is bis cas, I prefer dresses but I do wear pants/tops, and I’m not into the “third piece”. I would love to just buy several MM LaFleur dresses but that’s very much out of my price range and would be too fancy for my office anyway. How would you recommend getting started?
Anon
Should add that all of my work clothes are 5 years old and I’m tired of them so would be happy to start over rather than shop my closet!
Katie
MM Lafleur has a “Second Act” section on their website where people resell their lightly worn MM items, so if you do decide you want their dresses anyway (many of them can be dressed up or down), might be a budget-friendly place to start.
Panda Bear
One thing I’d start with is making sure you have the right footwear and outerwear. 1.5 miles isn’t a very long walk or bike ride overall, but in the rain, cold or wind it could be miserable without the right shoes/coat! And then think about how your other clothes fit into that. For example, I wouldn’t like riding my bike in a sheath dress, but an a-line cut would probably work.
op
Luckily I used to have a 3 mile bike/walk commute, so this feels extra quick! I have been known to break out the rain pants on occasion if it’s very rainy (I biked to work in a tropical storm a few years ago).
KP
If you keep your clothes for five years, you can afford to spend some money up front IMO. How about five dresses from Boded with knee height boots? Not cheap, but done for awhile.
op
I wish I could, but I’m on a budget (Old Navy, LOFT when on sale, consignment stores, TJ Maxx, etc).
Boden is not my style, but if it was I could probably swing a dress or two from there as a splurge/wait for a sale.
I honestly feel weird about replacing stuff that’s only 5 years old – it’s all held up well but weight changes + job changes (different dress codes) + not wearing work clothes for a year make me want to change it up
pugsnbourbon
I am in a bit of a similar position to you – on a budget (always), some weight changes and overall style changes. I try to keep clothes as long as possible but I’m also clumsy and hard on my clothes.
What I’m doing is re-evaluating the outfits I feel best in, now, and building from there. For me that’s been looser, tapered pants with a dressy-ish t-shirt or flowy top tucked in and loafers. Identifying individual pieces I need and shopping only for those items helps keep me on budget.
op
That’s a great suggestion – I’m a bull in a china shop so I feel your pain!
Anon
Very random suggestion, definitely of the “please disregard if it doesn’t work for you” variety: any desire to pick up a side gig (tutoring, something like that) for fun money? An extra $100 in your pocket every week can make a huge difference to your budget and allows people to feel comfortable spending money on things like clothes and hair.
op
I worked retail on the side for a while, but hated it! It’s probably less of a “can’t afford” and more of a “I’m on a budget, but I also spend my money elsewhere” – I spend a lot on experiences, and therefore just have less to spend on things.
I just always throw out that I’m on a budget when I ask questions here because I make way less than many people here (I work for a non-profit and make 55k a year) so the suggestions that come from Big Law lawyers are not applicable to me!
KP
Boden
Cat
I would evaluate what my fave workhorse pieces were from my existing wardrobe, and gradually look for updated replacements. This is also the time to be very honest about what neutral colors look best on you. I look like death in light gray and most camels; my foundation pieces are all navy and black.
emeralds
+1, this is a wise place to start.
OP, secondhand and consignment is for you if you like the look of higher-end lines like MM LaFleur but are on that $55k budget (which is also where I am). With things like Poshmark and ThredUp, it’s easy to set alerts for certain brands, pieces, etc. I feel like a broken record, but I’d also try and find a higher-end local consignment shop if that’s a possibility for your location and size requirements.
Anon B
Check out eShakti
Anon
Help! I had a dermaplane facial on Wednesday from the medical aesthetician at a well-regarded cosmetic surgery practice in my area. I had gone to her for a consult about fillers, and she recommended going with a facial instead, so I made the appointment. After she performed the planing, she applied an exfoliating scrub to my face. As soon as I felt the texture of the scrub on my face, I just felt like it was going to be too much exfoliation after having just been planed, but I didn’t say anything because, what do I know. It started to burn and get painful as she was massaging it on my face, so I mentioned that and when she wiped it off, she was immediately concerned at how red and puffy my skin had become, and grabbed ice packs. My face was red, puffy, and covered in bumps/patches. She kept applying ice packs and an ice roller and sent me home with ice packs and some samples of a moisturizer. She was very nice, very apologetic, gave me her cell #, etc. I could not wear makeup to work yesterday, and had to go to work with red, bump, angry skin. Today it is still very dry (I have oily skin normally) and peeling and very bumpy. I know it will heal (I hope!), but I’m worried that this may have permanently damaged my skin. I know skin regenerates, but it was a pretty severe reaction. Has anyone else had this happen?
BeenThatGuy
I’m so sorry you had this reaction! I dermaplane at home and my skin is normally extremely sensitive after (and I don’t have sensitive skin). Any products after I dermaplane burn the area so I’m shocked she exfoliated your skin after. It’s not permanent. It will pass in a few days. I’d use a facial mist with an oil to keep the skin supple. Only use gentle cleansers for the next few days. Nothing chemical or exfoliating at least for a week. I promise, it will get better.
FormerlyPhilly
Consult a dermatologist from a different practice entirely, sooner rather than later.
Panda Bear
+1, I’d go someplace else in the future. For one thing, I find it odd that you went in to consult about fillers and she suggested a facial instead (no facial in the world is going to do what fillers can do). But beyond that, it was not good judgment on her part to dermaplane and then do a scrub. Ouch!
Anon
I have had similar fiascos and even though it is miserable in the moment, you will be fine! You can go to the dermatologist to get some soothing topicals but really will just have to wait it out otherwise. Sorry this happened to you!! Hang in there!
Anon
In your shoes I’d go see my dermatologist – the one who treats my adult acne and goes my skin cancer check. I’m guessing she’d give me a prescription steroid cream and tell me to use it no more than three times.
If you have a rich moisturizer that you know you tolerate, use that and nothing else until your barrier is repaired. I like the Toleraine line from La Roche Posay for this.
In case it’s not clear, DO NOT use any actives until your barrier is repaired – no vitamin C, no retinoids, no exfoliating agents.
anon
Have you tried cortisone cream? I’d probably start there and try to get into a derm’s office asap.
Anon
Timely question- It looks like Ann taylor & Loft stopped their e-commerce. When I click through e-mail links it directs me to their main site and I don’t see the factory links when I consult googles. Any confirmation of this?
OP
Clarification- It looks like they stopped their factory e-commerce not the general brand
PolyD
Yeah, they stopped the websites for Loft Outlet and Ann Taylor Factory. I consider this a stupid move, as apparently do many former customers in their Instagram pages. I mean, especially at a time where people got used to doing a lot of online shopping, why on earth would you roll back your online presence? Especially when you don’t actually have a lot of bricks and mortar stores.
In the past, I got several items from both places that I liked a lot. I almost liked ATF mor than regular Ann – I didn’t need formal business wear and the dresses and shirts on ATF fit me well and were appropriate for my office.
Would love for any business types here to explain why a store would stop online sales. If shipping costs were a problem, they could always increase those, at least slightly.
PolyD
OMG, if you use a normal word that starts with an s for tops and blouses, your comment goes into moderation??
Anyway, yes, Loft Outlet and Ann Taylor Factory stopped their websites. Seems a stupid thing to do at a time when people got really used to shopping online and when you don’t have a lot of regular stores. Maybe a business type person here can explain why it makes sense to reduce your online presence in 2021.
Pep
I think there is a well-known troll that posts about that topic (s-word) so it’s probably to flag their posts for review.
Cat
On your shipping point- I basically refuse to shop anywhere that charges for shipping or return shipping. If your model is online sales, bake that into your pricing.
Anonymous
Yep. This is why I have never ordered from Title Nine and only order from Garnet Hill on rare occasions, only for non-sized items like linens, even though I would probably order a ton of stuff from them otherwise. The worst is when they charge shipping and base it on the price of the order instead of weight. I guess it’s because insurance on the shipping costs more, but no, I am not going to pay $15 to ship one sweater just because it’s cashmere and costs $150 (looking at you, Garnet Hill).
PolyD
OMG, if you use a normal word that starts with an s for tops and blouses, your comment goes into moderation??
Anyway, yes, Loft Outlet and Ann Taylor Factory stopped their websites. Seems a stupid thing to do at a time when people got really used to shopping online and when you don’t have a lot of regular stores. Maybe a business type person here can explain why it makes sense to reduce your online presence in 2021.
Cat
FWIW, any word including ‘s-te’ or ‘tr-ns’ will also go to mod so I think ‘webs-te’ got you…. Not sure about ‘sh-rt’!
No Face
I listened to a business podcast about another budget retail store stopping its website. Maybe TJ Maxx? Anyway, they had major inventory issues. Having different items in different stores based on availability made more sense for them.
Sybil
I recently started following a fashion blogger on some recommendations here (JoLynne Shane) and while I like her, she had a post today of clothing items/accessories she’s had more than two years. It was kind of depressing. I realize this is her job and of course she cycles through clothes more than most people, but still, the idea that still wearing something you bought in 2017 is noteworthy is just…yikes.
Anon
It’s also because she can’t make money off of items that aren’t for sale anymore. She needs to showcase products that she can link to, so that she can earn a commission from sales. In real life, she may still be wearing clothes from 2010, but she’s not going to showcase that on her blog.
Anon
Yeah, this. Fashion blogs have to showcase new items all the time. It’s not an accurate depiction of normal consumption habits.
Senior Attorney
One of the things I really like about the blogger Respect the Shoes is that she posts the same pieces over and over again, and when they’re no longer on sale she posts links to similar pieces instead.
Cat
I miss the days when bloggers would do try-on sessions in fitting rooms. They’re not pretending to buy all the stuff but providing more information about IRL color and fabric and fit. Unfortunately stores now have SO little merchandise in the store that everyone is forced online.
Smokey
She might be on the old side for many of the readers here, but awellstyledlife is a blog that features weekly dressing room tryons. She tends to review casual items from Nordstrom and the usual mall stores. I find it interesting and useful to see what items look like irl.
Anon
I’ve come across this too. I think it Emily Henderson who wrote a few blog posts about a jacket that she owned and wore for 3 years, like it was noteworthy and amazing. It was so bizarre, don’t most people wear jackets and coats for years?
C
Jackets and coats especially are items that I hold on to for years and years
anon
yeah, my parka is a decade old and my wool coat is 6 years old. I have no intentions of replacing either!
Anony
I have a gorgeous “Ralph” mid-thigh length, black peacoat that I bought at Polo Factory Store when I worked there in 2000, my senior year of high school. It’s my dress-up coat and still looks awesome.
Anonymous
It’s irritating because bloggers will hawk new coats as “investment pieces” or “enduring classics” and then replace the next year. It’s so wasteful.
Anon
As long as they sell them to me at a discount, no waste has occurred. Very grateful to the shoppers whose cast off clothing helps me thrift!
Monday
I saw a TikTok video last night that blew my mind. Technically, “fast fashion” is defined only by how many different “seasonal” drops a brand does per year, NOT by price or quality. So, brands like Madewell, Anthropologie, Lululemon and Savage x Fenty are all fast fashion. Any brand that consistently has a “new arrivals” section: fast fashion. Probably every brand featured here too.
The only way to have a sustainable fashion presence on social media would probably be to be very boring. I’m glad my livelihood has nothing to do with this, it’s sort of a trap.
SF Attorney
I still wear a black wool winter coat that I bought at Loehman’s. I can’t remember when Loehman’s closed, but I know it’s been many years.
KateL
I paid to have a black wool coat from Loehmanns relined in 2012 –
Coat is from 2007 and I still have it!
Anon
We could be twins except my (relined) coat is from the 90s so we are probably not.
anonshmanon
I used to read a photo-a-day outfit blog (this was before Instagram) where a woman would present her outfit that was either remixed and matched from her closet or new thrifted pieces. Maybe an Instagram account like this would be interesting for you? As balance to the fashion blog.
Anonymous
I agree it’s depressing. I buy good quality clothing and unless it turns out to have some weird fit issue, I wear it until I wear it out. If everyone did the same we would have much smaller landfills.
anon
Even clothing that’s not generally viewed as high quality lasts years and years – my clothes come from Old Navy and TJ Maxx and I’ve rarely gotten rid of something because it didn’t hold up. I generally keep things until they no longer fit or are truly out of style and then I donate or repurpose them. I still regularly wear clothes that are 5-10 years old; I’m in my 20s and I think I”m reasonably fashionable. I obviously supplement with new peices but I hold on to things for years and years.
Anonymous
Can confirm. I am wearing an Old Navy fleece from 2002 or thereabouts as I type this.
Anonymous
I’m not fashionable and don’t claim to be, but I have workout clothes from Patagonia and (randomly) a few tank tops from Old Navy that I’ve been wearing for well over 10 years. Some of the Patagonia stuff is at least 20 years old because I got it secondhand.
anon
I agree with you. But this is literally every fashion blogger, which is why I take what they recommend with a huge grain of salt. I think the key is being really honest with yourself about how many clothes you actually need and can wear regularly. This is a struggle for me. I like the idea of having variety, but it can definitely lead to overbuying. I do laundry all the friggin’ time, so the chances of me running out of anything are slim.
eertmeert
She is a blogger though. So a post about what she’s liked, kept and still wears from the last few years reminds me more of the “Best of drugstore makeup 2020” videos from beauty youtubers. They go through so much makeup it boggles the mind. But it is their job.
This post comes off more as judging a woman for her business than about her personal wardrobe choices.
Monday
It’s fine to judge anyone for their business though.
eertmeert
So then where is the line of when not to judge? Don’t judge women for posing nude online but do judge them for posing in clothes online?
Do you need to feel superior because we are “overacheiving chicks” and not housewives/mothers/women with a side hustle? Sorry, I find that attitude gross. And hypocritical to be posting about on a fashion blog…
I’ve followed Jo-Lynne Shane online for maybe a year, and during covid times she has saved me a from a number of online purchases that would not have worked for my body (my frame is similar to hers) that I would have just returned. And frankly, she returns a good portion of what she tries on. Same with other bloggers, like Putting Me Together, Looks Good From the Back, and Wardrobe Oxygen. Their job is to churn through clothes and review them. It’s not like they throw them away when they are done, like beauty you-tubers do when their piles of makeup expire. The clothes get donated or returned.
NJ bound
Can anyone comment on what the traffic/parking is like at the Harrison PATH station? I’m moving to Essex County and will be commuting to downtown Manhattan. If feasible, I’d like to drive to the PATH station rather than dealing with multiple forms of public transit. I’m moving across the country, so I don’t know how realistic this is.
anon
I cannot comment on the parking. of note is that Harrison PATH area is….re gentrifying for several years so you may want to search about the current safety of the area. From 1960s/70s the area started to decline but they have been investing in the red bull stadium, and housing in the area.
HTH
Anonymous
Can’t speak to Harrison, but I used to drive to Hoboken and park there all the time when I had classes at NYU. If you don’t like Harrison, Hoboken always seems set up well for this.
roxie
caveat that you would need to arrive in Hoboken early enough to park in a garage. Street parking is HIGHLY regulated and reserved for local residents for precisely this reason.
NJ Anon
I live in the area and often take the PATH from Harrison for the same reasons. There is a parking deck right next to the station that I have always parked in, not sure what the monthly permit situation is but I’ve never had any issue getting a spot there. Re the comment about the safety of the area, I have never felt unsafe near the path (or in harrison in general); the area surrounding the station is all new restaurants and apartment buildings. The PATH station was also recently redone and is much nicer than it used to be.
Brunette Elle Woods
Not sure what the parking is like in Newark but the Newark Path Station is not a great place to be late at night. It can be pretty sketchy. I live in Hoboken and while it is a good option, be mindful of the cost of parking. It can add up quickly. Also, Hoboken is very prone to flooding so be careful. I know people whose cars were flooded and completely totaled.
Anonymous
Newark is the #1 stolen car city in the US. Last time I parked at the Newark train station someone tried to pry my door handles off with a crowbar. When it’s dark in Newark all bets are off.
Anon
Also in Hoboken – there are garages with daily/monthly but most street parking requires a resident permit or an hourly meter. Also in normal times traffic in and out of Hoboken is pretty bad during rush hour.
Brunette Elle Woods
Yea I’d avoid driving and parking in Newark. Sounds scary! I’m a Hoboken resident so I park on the street. The garages are probably at least $100 a month to park during limited hours. Overall, I’d spend the money to park in Hoboken where it’s safer but if you park on ground level be mindful of flooding!
Anon
Honestly it’s kind of sketchy sometimes in the middle of the day. I used to take Amtrak from there frequently and the area is kind of sad.
ElisaR
Pre-covid: boarding the train in Harrison looked like a nightmare. I would often board in Newark where the train car would fill to capacity, then it would stop in Harrison and nobody could step on because it was already packed.
anon
Hi,
Looking for some wisdom:
I’ve held a few positions in the last decade, averaging about 2 years each. I will do a transformation project and then (all but one) be recruited to another role.
None of these changes have been because I don’t perform, I am often charged with bringing worst to first and do so well. I was strongly recruited to my current role even though I wasn’t looking. I’ve brought our team through a transformation although there have been several thorns: my current boss used to ‘manage’ this area (and I use that term VERY loosely). He was promoted shortly before his manager (my boss’ boss, C level) was exited for lack of performance. I took over and things were a mess, internal clients ranged from disgusted to disengaged/committed to going around us. My directs had all applied for the role I am in now and failed to place. Most of the team was doing another team’s job (they needed help, but still it was 100% of their time) instead of the role they were in.
I’ve shared the vision, encouraged and coached, heard difficult messages (three of the team were being bullied by my directs, it may have been related to those bullied being gay or of a different faith). I’ve retained key talent, encouraged those who wanted to do the other role to move to that role full time and now have a very highly functioning team. The issue is that my boss keeps harping on the 3 people who moved on as proof I did something wrong. My current team gives me good feedback consistently. I designed the transformation of his entire team of teams since, and he moved two other problematic teams to me. He told me he gave me credit for the slides he presented (without me), which means he took credit for the ideas and path forward.
I’ve worked 18 hour days for 9 months in the transition, to no raise, no increased bonus and no positive feedback from him. Now, when any of my new team do a small fraction of the same, he raves about them! No matter what I say or do, he just ignores it. I’ve even brought up, ‘yes, X did a great job on Y escalation. I have covered about a dozen in transition and they can be very thorny and time consuming”. He just ignores is and moves on. I’m very very proud of the people on my team, I promote the work they do in conversations and to our business partners. One of them has been praised for fixing the very major Risk issue I started to look at last year. When he shared it, my boss agreed although the same words from me were greeted with ‘you don’t know what you’re talking about’.
End of year feedback was so personal and weaponised, I had to turn my camera off because I cried. I was exhausted and had just achieved major successes but he just ripped into me for 40 minutes. My hair fell out for months, I still have a few bald spots and had to cut my hair to make the new growth less noticable (I looked like I had a wig on for about half the length of my hair).
I’ve apparently done nothing of note for 2 years and his long term staff (my peers) are same, but the other woman (also my peer) goes to the mgmt table every 2 months to present and now is an ex officio. I was promised a track to promo but I can’t even get a thank you. I realise I will never get anywhere here, even if I leave the new team will carry the space with little help from him.
In 2 years, my boss was only nice to me for only 6 weeks, while he was being investigated by HR for another complaint (they contacted me directly but I was afraid to speak up because no matter the policy about retaliation….I believe he would increase his campaign of being rude, dismissive and no credit).
I am really disappointed and choosing to apply for another internal transfer to someone I know and trust as my mgr. We are both senior and she knows my work. I don’t want to look like a perpetual job hopper or that I’m being moved on in interviews. I admit my confidence is battered after 2 years with this person, clear eyed friends have described him as abusive, territorial and threatened by my success where he had flailed. I feel like I’m in an abusive relationship – I keep working hard and hoping for a kind word only to feel ignored and kicked….
I want to come off as competent, kind and confident professional I have been in the past but I feel terrible and new mgr said I look like I hope around too much).
Sorry for long post but look forward to your comments (I’m open to growth feedback, just request – please be kind)
No Problem
It sounds to me like your job is basically change management of some kind. I also imagine that it’s extremely common for people in those kinds of roles to move on frequently; once you fix the problem, there’s nothing else to do. So isn’t that pretty much how you frame “job hopping?” I put that in quotes, because it doesn’t sound like you’ve really hopped jobs, that’s just the nature of the work you do. It also sounds like you would be better off applying to external roles.
Sorry your current manager is being so awful. Have you talked much with his manager about it?
Cat
Yes, this. You’re not a “job hopper” if the nature of the work is that you come in to manage thorny, lengthy transformations and then once it’s over it’s back to regular day-to-day ops.
When you say “new manager said you look like you hop around too much” are you referring to your current awful guy or the possible new internal manager? I think you can pretty confidently ignore current manager’s views at this point.
Cat
(Re-posting bc tr-ns gahhhhh)
Yes, this. You’re not a “job hopper” if the nature of the work is that you come in to manage thorny, lengthy tr-nsformations and then once it’s over it’s back to regular day-to-day ops.
When you say “new manager said you look like you hop around too much” are you referring to your current awful guy or the possible new internal manager? I think you can pretty confidently ignore current manager’s views at this point.
Anon
I think it’s very very normal to hop around every 2 years, and I would not blink an eye at a transition at 9 months. Give yourself some grace. You’re doing great. Life is too short to work for a toxic person.
Anon
Leave NOW. The job hopper role is a LOT easier to overcome than the trauma you are experiencing.
Ask me how I know this.
anon
+1 this is not job hopping given the nature of your work and 2 years is FINE.
Senior Attorney
Yes! Also being a “job hopper” is not the stigma it was back in my day. Put yourself first!
anon
OP here
thank you for the kind words and the quick replies. I appreciate each one.
a little while after I posted, thought about what I wrote from the angle of “what if a loved one told me their hair fell out in clumps for 4 months after being yelled at?”. I think I’m going to look at speaking to someone.
I haven’t talked to his manager because I am really scared he would find some vengeful way to have an impact on me. this further cements that I’m in an abusive situation…..it’s scary how quickly he was able to have a deep and negative impact on me. he basically wooed me into the role and was so positive until my actual day 1. he sent an email saying ‘reach out to these people, they are your team’ and then acted like every question or trying to learn more was an imposition.
for those who were in similar, I’m so sorry to hear as well. this takes over your life!
Anon
I’m sorry – that sounds like a lot. I don’t think you would be considered a job hopper for an internal transfer, and even if you decide to go external I would talk about your transformation roles. That would explain shorter stints and a lot of potential employers would get excited about that.
I can commiserate with the particular situation you’re in right now. I was internally recruited by a man I had considered a mentor for years to do his old job so he could move up to a new role.
In the new role he was my manager, which he hadn’t been before. He didn’t like his new role and kept getting involved in my role, his old role, because he was more comfortable doing it.
He gave orders to my direct reports without involving me and created an atmosphere where the staff was divided in their loyalties to either him or to me.
I also took on this role at a time when the corporation was doubling to tripling our responsibilities and I hired a lot of great new staff, which he had to sign off on, but then complained to everyone that he had been able to handle the role with far fewer staff and acted like I was a diva for needing so many staff members, never mind that he had been hemorrhaging staff because of the ridiculous hours he expected from them.
It was a completely toxic environment and I still have nightmares about it. I didn’t leave soon enough. I did it for four years and if I could go back in time I think two years should have been the max. Hope that helps you!
anon
OP here.
My boss also does this thing, and then flaunts it to me as if to show I am powerless:
He gave orders to my direct reports without involving me and created an atmosphere where the staff was divided in their loyalties to either him or to me.
I also have nightmares. Thank you for the kind words, I feel less alone and doubting myself and my value.
Anon
If it makes you feel better still, I’m 5 years out from the experience and I still run into staff from that job from time to time (smallish industry). Just about every time I see one of them they go out of their way to tell me I was a great manager and they miss me. Even including many of those who were on the old-boss side of the unnecessary divided loyalties.
Old boss left the company shortly before I did, didn’t last at the next company and took early retirement. He tried to reach out to me to “catch up” a couple of times and I ignored that part of his message (like he would say, hey I don’t know if you heard I took early retirement, it would be great to have a call to catch up, and I’d respond congratulations on your retirement!)
Anon
Coming in a bit late on this and I see other people have hit the salient points. My career involves going into companies, analyzing problems, strategizing a fix for the problems, and setting up the fix + the change management that’s needed. Once that’s done, I’m done and I need to find a new problem to fix. I worked for one large organization where I moved about every 18 months, shortest stint was 6 months and longest was 26 months. It’s just the nature of the job. I would not worry about being perceived as a “job hopper” because of this. Also, would like to say that is why many people who are good at being Ms. Fix-its start their own consulting business or become turnaround-CEOs-for-hire. If people want to look at you through a very narrow, very traditional career lens it may seem weird. If you brand yourself as a turnaround expert, or process improvement consultant, etc. etc. then your path makes total sense. So think about how you’re branding yourself internally.
I will also say that my exit point in any job situation is when I start seeing physical manifestations of my stress and I can’t get them under control. If you have an opportunity to move out from this boss that is making your life miserable, just go. Go now. It’s not worth your health to eke out a few more months so it “looks better.”
anon
OP:
thank you, you are so wise and I’m sorry to hear you’ve also have physical manifestations of stress too. I’ve never had my hair fall out in clumps, even after significant personal losses.
this is how I brand myself but I think I have been too shaken to share my brand well.
Tired, so tired
How long have those of you with a long BigLaw tenure lasted? I feel like I have coasted down from the job I could keep up with in my 20s — first, moving to a smaller city and a branch office, then by carving out a niche that was somewhat predictable. But I feel like I just cannot keep going like this. [OTOH, guys work into their 50s/60s, the college tuition years (so I’d like to hang on).] The pandemic has just been a sh*tshow (our schools were closed last year, this year looks grim, with lots of quarantine interruptions probably; kids are pretty self-reliant but too young to get vaxxed, so will likely be at home off and on even if school stays open.]
Cornellian
I was there a bit over seven years, which is objectively long, especially for a woman or minority. I think the pandemic has been awful for women working in all jobs, but definitely in BigLaw, in part because it’s been largely the women picking up all the slack from schools closing/etc. I don’t know your life or your details, but I definitely give you permission to cut expenses and try to get out of BigLaw. It seems like a good time for lawyers to find new jobs, at least in transactional and regulatory fields.
Anon
I went in-house at 5 years and never looked back. While there was an initial pay cut, what I hadn’t factored in was how much more growth potential there was by moving out of the law firm up/out model. I was able to join a company a pt a junior level, move up with in-house experience, change companies and I’m a GC now at a small company. My total compensation is on par with what I would have earned at a firm and that was true at lower levels as well. I also have a lot more job security. I think it’s common to look at leaving big law as “the end of things” but I preferred to look at it as a well paid medical residency that was just my foundational legal training.
Anonymous
Interesting — I have had so many friends find that the hard stop they really bargained for never really happened in-house. People were in different time zones. Still not a lot of people who got working moms. A lot left for “JD-preferred” jobs in compliance or contracting and those seem to be strictly 9-5 with honored vacations.
Anon
Make no mistake, going in-house does not mean 9-5 by any stretch of the imagination and if you’re looking for that, I’m not sure what to tell you. What you get is a workflow that’s not based on billing time and adding value because of your perspective. You have more control over your life because you have a job with the client instead of working for the client.
Anonymous
I’m going on 11 years. I’m constantly shocked by how many people get away with coasting, at both the associate and partner levels. And it’s not just white men either. Maybe they don’t internalize the pressure to bill more? They don’t care if people are upset and disappointed with them, or that their coasting means other people have to work even harder? Idk. I admire, envy, and hate them all at the same time.
Anonymous
Real question: how does BigLaw coasting compare, do you think, to in-house? Or to being truly part-time?
IMO coasting in BigLaw is probably close to a FT job, just not by BigLaw standards. Maybe that is the secret (and delegating, but all of our good juniors keep leaving and they leave big shoes to fill).
Anonymous
It varies. Some practice areas are always kind of slow, so I would say they range between FT and PT positions depending on the season. But some people choose to coast even when others in their group are slammed; I would say they work PT, but maybe some of them are working 40 hours a week and it just feels like they’re doing so much less because they’re never around when you need them. I don’t know how some people manage to coast for years while others get fired despite having more hours and better quality work. It’s baffling.
Anon
i work at a university with a vaccination requirement for students, and with an indoor mask mandate, except when eating. freshman orientation started earlier this week and there have already been so many breakthrough cases that they have moved the first two weeks of classes online and have ceased indoor dining. my team has been WFH, but one of my vaxxed colleagues has covid from hanging out with a group of vaxxed people. she is pretty sick, though not hospital level sick. is this virus ever going to end?!?!
Tired, so tired
At this rate, we may get herd immunity.
I know of a healthy guy in his 20s who got COVID this spring (mild case) and has had one shot (was told to delay a bit after COVID for the first shot) and is how sick at home with a fever for a week, awaiting test results (and I’m thinking it is likely COVID).
Anonymous
I don’t know how we will ever achieve herd immunity when there are so many breakthrough cases in vaccinated people and when reinfection is possible. If herd immunity requires 70 – 80% immunity, but vaccination or infection only confers partial protection against (re)infection, herd immunity might not be possible even if every person in the population is vaccinated or was previously infected.
Anon
it’s largely society’s own fault since not enough people are vaccinated, giving the virus too much opportunity for mutation. and wear a freaking mask!
Anonymous
That was me — I don’t think we’ll get to herd immunity (that was my gallows humor kicking in). Maybe it will be more like the flu (not bad if you get the shot, but you still might get it but also you likely won’t DIE). But, yeah, just printed out the latest quarantine / isolation guidance b/c with a household of 4 (3 vaxxed, 1 too young), we will likely need to refer to it a bunch.
Monday
Woof. Can you share your state or at least region? Curious what this might portend…
Cat
This is just math. The more people that are vaccinated, the more people that are eligible for breakthrough infections, which even at peak immunity would be 5 or more percent of the vaccinated population. With the news that immunity does wane somewhat over time… it’s not surprising that let’s say a fifth of the students would catch it.
Anonymous
I think that’s OP’s point. It’s just math, and that math is depressing. Even if you’re vaccinated, you can’t count on being fully protected, and even a “mild” case of COVID is not something you want. Add to that the fact that not everyone is vaccinated and many people are not masking, and we are all going to be living with a pretty big risk of COVID for the rest of our lives.
Cornellian
If anyone is a data geek, check out this most recent MMWR from the CDC, they have a study that covers May-July (i.e. the presence of Delta). In short the weekly estimate of vaccines’ efficacy against infection has fallen ~15% but efficacy against hospitalization has remained unchanged (it’s bounced 1 or 2% each week, but remains high).
Cornellian
It’s unfortunately not broken out by vaccine, but 59% had Pfizer, 32% Moderna and 9% J&J. Not sure if that’s representative of the broader American population…
anonshmanon
I think this feels like the waves of last year, but it’s not if you look closely. IF your area (ideally the town, not just the school) has high vaccination rates, then you can see a surge of breakthrough cases, but not the surge in hospitalizations and deaths that used to come with it. That’s where it’s different, but just looking at the graph going up again, that difference is easy to overlook. I don’t know how much further to the destination, but I am telling you that we are indeed moving forward! That’s all the pep talk I have.
OP
well i unfortunately live in TX, so not really. and yea, it is great not to end up in the hospital, but my colleague who has covid will probably be out for a week. she doesn’t have kids, but i do have unvaccinated kids. the pediatric icus are full. the adult icus are full. it is also just really really hard to live wondering if you will have to quarantine. our grandparents live flying distance away. there was a brief period of time where i didn’t have to worry about my parents flying to visit us and then infecting my kids, but now that is gone. i am supposed to go visit friends i haven’t seen in two years next month. when we booked the trip, the idea was that vaccinated people could not spread the virus. apparently they can. this is just a hard way to live.
OP
and my heart just breaks for immunocompromised adults and kids who are dealing with additional levels of stress and anxiety
Anon
Vaccination rates are very high where I am, but hospitals are still full. Presumably this is because of lower vaccination rates in areas that are sending patients here, after filling up their own hospitals. Hopefully deaths won’t surge, but full hospitals increases the risk of any emergency.
Curious
If you’re in Washington State, the hospitals are full because they can’t discharge patients due to staffing shortages at long term care facilities. Seattle Times just did a piece on it. So many things that used to just “work” are broken.
Anonymous
I am going to wrap myself in bubble wrap — I don’t want to get hurt enough to need medical care at this point. No car accidents. No burns. No tripping on the stairs. Definitely no heart attacks or cancer. There isn’t room for any of this.
Anonymous
You can’t blame workers for not wanting to work in long-term care facilities when they’re paid absolutely crap wages for hard, physical, emotionally challenging, and dangerous (in terms of COVID) work. It’s absolutely no surprise to me that they’re not adequately staffed.
Anon
I’m in SEUS, but the staffing shortages are no joke. Word of mouth is that staff just keep quitting. Filling those vacancies right now is not a simple proposition… it’s not easy to find willing, qualified people who aren’t burned out, and it’s not easy to find the money to pay them with.
Peanut
and a lot of the lack of workers in washington state is because unemployment pays up to $41,000 per year. If you’re a low wage worker, you’d rather stay home and get paid unemployment than go to work, especially given that there is covid risk of working, day cares have risk and schools have risk. Supply and demand and washington stat needs to end the extra federal unimployment pay to get more people back to work.
A + Fed
We’ll be living with this virus forever. It will become like the flu, where there are really, really bad years and some years where it barely registers a blip. There is not a way to put the genie back in the bottle.
Anon
Seems like we should be investing in healthcare infrastructure in a serious way if this is the future we’re envisioning.
A nurse's mom
Nursing as it existed prior to 2020 is broken, and I’m not sure it can be fixed. There was already a crisis/ledge looming as the expected number of bed side nurses retiring in the 2020s were not going to be replaced by the number of students in nursing schools. Nurses, particularly ICU nurses, but also ER, are suffering moral injury from the pandemic. There are ICUs where the charge nurses (those who manage the shift long staffing and are the ‘experienced’ nurse on the floor) have less than 2 years experience. Nurses are fleeing the bedside. Staffing is crazy, an ICU nurse handling heart/lung transplant patients should not be staffed for more than 1 to 2 patients, but there are major transplant centers where they are being staffed for 3/4. Everyone is being asked to work extra shifts, and their pay and benefits were cut at the beginning of the pandemic and are not being restored.
Anonymous
I really would want to step in as a nurse’s aide right now, as sort of a national service I have never given. I don’t think that that is feasible, but is there anything a mere adult can do to help out?
Cornellian
I literally just signed up for an EMT course because it’s not a huge commitment, it’s a good skillset to have, and I figure I can volunteer/help people more effectively that way. I’m not 100% going through with it but… can’t hurt! (I’m a lawyer, for the record)
Peanut
I’m so tired of this. I’m sure we’re all tired, but not as much as the poor doctors and nurses on the front lines. Sigh.
Anon
I”m trying to automate as much as I can to prevent decision fatigue – I’d like to come up with a list of 2 weeks worth of meals to cook, 2 weeks worth of work outfits, go-to workouts, etc. so when I’m burnt out I don’t spend any additional effort thinking of what to do. I already have my skincare routine on a schedule and wear the same makeup every day, but what other things can I automate like this?
Tired, so tired
Every Monday I roast a chicken (WFH FTW and time for this); that gives me good leftover options for a couple of days.
Tu — spaghetti
W or TH — chicken leftover as the basis of something else
W or TH — fun takeout
F — something to grill
S — fun take out
S — something I don’t have time to make during the week
Sfchic
I do something similar but more lazy. Every 10 days or so I get a huge Rotisserie chicken from Costco, that we get multiple meals from – Warm roast chicken one night (reheat under foil with 1 cup chicken stock in pan for 25 min at 350, then 5 min with foil off). Then one night with chicken over some sort of salad/burrito bowl. Then some sort of chicken Quesadilla. Then chicken salad (either Asian or indian flavorings). So easy.
Anon
Parking in the same spot or close to it every day! I have a designated place for keys, sunglasses, and things like that so I never have to look for those little items while I’m (inevitably) running late.
OP
oh I so wish I could do that – I only drive once a week or so (walking commute and downtown living!) but I street park in the city so I never know where I’ll find a spot! I always make a note in my phone with the cross streets of where I”m parked!
LaurenB
You can also take a pic of the cross streets, or a store you’re parked in front of.
Anon
If you have apple car play, it intergrates with google maps and saves where you parked the car. Super neat. I just got a new car that has apple car play intergration, I don’t know if this is usable without that but it might be — and I’m sure there’s an android version too.
OP
I would love Apple CarPlay – I think it’s awesome for many reasons! My car is old enough that it actually predates the first iPod, let alone an iPhone!
No Problem
Schedule other chores if you can. Groceries is Monday, laundry is Tuesdays, clean out the fridge/take out the trash Wednesdays, clean a bathroom or dust/vacuum a room on Thursdays, etc. Whatever schedule works for you.
LaurenB
Add getting gas to that. Pick a day that you’ll fill up, regardless whether you are just topping off or filling a car near empty. It’s all about reducing decision making.
Vicky Austin
I used to get gas every grocery trip regardless. I might go back to doing that!
Cat
Having a designated “day” for various errands and chores. Like, I always do dry cleaning on Wednesdays because it’s discounted, I always do a load of dark laundry on Friday (so all of our air-dry workout stuff is ready to go for weekend outdoor activities) and a load of white laundry on Sunday (after we do a quick clean in the morning so the bleach rags can go straight into the wash), etc.
aannoonn
Can you put certain products/shopping items on auto ship? You can auto ship pet products, pantry essentials, bulky items like paper products, all sorts of things so you never run out and can minimize actual grocery shopping and errands to just perishables.
LaurenB
I also pre-buy staples. So for example — and I just wear the basic Hanes or F of the Loom underwear – I have extra packs of those so I don’t ever need to go buy them. (Well, I won’t say never, but not for a long while.) Ditto for toothpaste, mouthwash, deodorant, etc.
Anonymous
M- salad
T- tacos
W- sheet pan
T-fish/or pasta/ or fun new recipe
F-pizza
Above is my dinner plan. I can be as lazy or creative I want with it and if my husband wants to get started on dinner he can probably figure it out without talking to me.
Here’s what’s helping me with wfh:
I only eat salsa chicken (pre cooked and shredded) over frozen corn topped with shredded cheese nuked and topped with salsa and guac and hot sauce or a turkey sandwich for lunch. They are filling, enjoyable, quick and don’t weigh me down.
I always log on at 8 am and do hard work through 2pm, with short breaks for food (Today I have the day off.) Anything drafted gets served first thing the next day so I can look at it with fresh eyes.
I stop work at 2 to go running. I only run for 20 minutes then I walk home and shower and monitor email/do low level admin work for the rest of the day.
Other things:
I have seven pairs of identical pajamas. We always change the sheets on Friday. Cooks don’t clean in our house. All towels and sheets are white. Veuve cliquot is my default hostess gift and adult birthday gift. I keep personalized stationary around because it’s easier than remembering to buy a card. If we’re eating at a diner I’m having a BLT.
Anon
+1 to white sheets and towels and always changing linens on the same day each week.
Senior Attorney
I love your last paragraph!!
Cat
me too except… do people really wear fresh PJs every night?? I wear the same set for a week…. but I do wear underwear to bed and apparently some don’t.
Anonymous
I wear fresh PJs and undies every night. But based on what I read here, I am apparently the only person in the world who actually sweats and has to wear clean clothes and wash her hair daily.
Anon at 11:59
I wear a new set of pjs every night because it saves the “is this dirty enough to wash?”decision.
anonshmanon
yeah, nope. This post is about streamlining chores. Tripling laundry is not my idea of that.
anon
Yeah, I wash my sheets weekly and probably do new PJs every 3-5 days.
I don’t sweat at night, usually but I do wash my hair every single day.
Senior Attorney
Not to nitpick, but although one inference is that this poster wears fresh PJ’s every night, she doesn’t actually say that. It could be that she owns 7 pair of identical PJ’s so she can re-wear and go a couple/few weeks without doing PJ laundry.
Pep
I wear the same PJ pants all week (with underwear) but I do wear a fresh T-shirt every night. I do shower before bed.
Anon
I wear fresh pjs (no underwear) every night. I can’t stand getting into bed in dirty clothes! And all my pjs are matching sets because I’m extra.
Anonymous
+1 to personalized stationery. Remembering to buy cards on time was a pain point for me and now that’s totally gone.
anon
we have smart vacuums of various brands including the one that cleans out the cup into a dispenser because it was from a 1 000 to 300 once on amazon which is the standard price for others. we set those, outdoor lights, our new pool and anything else we can on automate.
check out IFTT for some other options on automations to remove tasks that take up remembering….
also phone and alexa for reminders (take the car in, take medicines, etc )
Cornellian
You’re a master.
Anon
I wear fresh pajamas every night and I don’t shower every day (I’m every other day or after workouts)
anon
this is brilliant, you have just changed my life on the wfh exercise.
Anon
If I find a clothing item I like and that fits well, I buy multiples. Like a top in every colour or three pairs of the same black pants. I’ll even buy multiple pairs of shoes if I really like a pair.
anon
+1
Anon
I definitely do that with bottoms (skirts and pants and jeans) and shoes but tops are where I get a little variety so tend not to.
Though I guess I do have like 4 of the same Flax shell in different colors so ….
anon
I love, love, love earrings so I have a ton. However, I rotate through and for a month or so at a time just wear 2-3 pairs. Then, when I get bored I go back in the jewelry box and pull out a different pair or three.
In the morning, choosing jewelry is easy but I still have a large selection that I love.
Anonymous
I was today year’s old when I learned gmail flags some emails as promotional, skips your inbox, and sends them to an entirely separate folder buried in that categories tab I never clicked. Hello and goodbye, sales emails from 2012.
Grace
How on earth is this a dolman sleeve? (I get that that’s what Old Navy calls it and Corporette is just using the name of the product. But wtf? It’s a standard sleeve with the opening just at the armpit.
Senior Attorney
My thoughts exactly. Good grief, apparently words have no meaning any more.
Pep
Like when they started marketing four-door cars as coupes.
Anon
They did? Ughhhhh!
Anon
Like, every dot is now a polka dot. No, no, it’s not.
Anon
I’ve long wished for a “ShopStyle” or similar aggregate shopping site that just correctly labels and tags all the clothes by cut, style, and fabric type. There are certain cuts that really work for me (“princess seams”), and I’m sure they are out there somewhere, but they’re not usually searchable.
Anonymous
I just have to say that I am incredibly annoyed at Florida for reducing the frequency of its COVID data releases to once a week, which makes monitoring the situation more difficult and also makes forecasting more difficult, and at IHME for still having its August 5 models up when it said it was going to update them yesterday.
Fun Food to Ship
I’d like to send my teenage nieces a happy first day of school treat. I’ve sent Milk Bar and Georgetown Cupcakes in the past, which they loved. They seem to love anything “Instagramable”. Any ideas for other companies in that same vein?
Anon
Laduree macarons, maybe? Are those still cool?
Sfchic
Those are beyond cool.
Too nice for a teenager though?
Cat
A gummy candy platter type thing?
anon
or the enormous gummies….
Grace
Something from Universal Yums? My nephews love those.
FormerlyPhilly
Levain cookies?
Daffodil
Cupcakes from Baked By Melissa – they’re my go-to gift for things like this.
Anonymous
Rose Ave Bakery assuming they are in DC (based on Georgetown Cupcakes.) VERY of the moment. They do sell out. Un je ne qouis in Dupont also makes beautiful and delicious French pastries.
Anon
Sugarfina gummies!
Anon
You are a cool aunt!
OP
Love every one of these ideas! Thanks all!
Anonymous
Has anyone else run into this and how did you deal with it – I need a team to help with a matter but I’m not getting the support I need and the senior partners don’t seem to be able to do anything about it. I get people who want to do discrete one-off projects, not who want to/have capacity to be part of a team. They do exactly what is asked and no more. No one takes ownership of the project they’re assigned; if they see problems they don’t tell me, and if they have to follow up with someone or need more information they just stop working. If there is a natural follow up needed to complete the assignment they don’t do it. At first I thought maybe I wasn’t being specific enough in my instructions. But I’ve since realized it’s not possible for me to be sufficiently specific to anticipate all the ways they can interpret the instructions to not actually give me a complete work product. Is there a better strategy for managing people who want to act like freelancers, not a team?
anon
Daily standups, like scrum masters do.
I have done these with teams that range from Managing Directors (I’m in finance) to new interns and grads (although usually 2-3 rank grades at time, not the full span).
15 minutes, top of the day: what was finished yesterday, what’s on for the day, what is stuck (scrum masters help with the stuck). it synchronises and updates and you can edit to include next steps.
Anonymous
What’s a scrum master?
anon
https://www.scrum.org/resources/what-is-a-scrum-master
macros
For people that track their macros, any suggestions for ways to increase carbs in a relatively nutritious way? I’ve been tracking my macros for the past week (aiming for 45% carbs, 35% fat, 20% protein) and I’m always super high in fats – usually my breakdown for the day is 30% carbs, 50% fats, 20% protein (usually around 150g of carbs instead of the 200g goal). I’m a vegetarian so it makes sense that some of my protein sources would also be high in fat (eggs, cheese, nuts), but I don’t really restrict grains so I thought my carbs would be higher. How can I up the carbs without a bunch of empty calories? Do I just eat a ton of fruit?
Anonymous
Oatmeal, granola.
anonshmanon
Potatoes, sweet potatoes, corn, peas come to mind. Maybe explore other tubers and possibly pumpkins as well?
macros
pumpkin! did not think of that but that sounds great.
Anon
My blood glucose can’t handle carbs for medical reasons, so this is a dream question for me. I would be going for all the starchy vegetables. Water chestnuts, parsnips, sweet potato. Regular potatoes may be more nutritious than you think. Maybe try beet pickling some of those eggs! Can you toss some chickpeas into salads? Do you like kasha?
macros
I had never heard of kasha but I’m going try it!
Senior Attorney
Beans! I love to mix beans, corn, and brown rice for a “starch salad.”
Senior Attorney
Also: https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/323110
macros
Oooh, starch salad sounds good! And thanks for this link – I love beets and didn’t realize they were a good source of carbs.
Anonymous
I always have the opposite problem! Look into high protein low fat options. Lentils and beans are good examples. Peas also have a surprising amount of protein.
macros
That’s what I would have thought! When I started this I thought for sure I was going to find out that all I eat are carbs, so I was very surprised. I actually love peas (I think b/c of childhood nostalgia?) and didn’t realize that – going to pick some up from the store today!
anon
there is also good “pea protein” powder avail for smoothies….
Anon
You don’t have to eat a starchy vegetable to eat carbs – really any vegetable will work. You can also do legume, beans, and whole grains.
Anon
And I should probably say that some veggies are low in carbs on a nutrition label because they subtract out fiber. But, I think nutrition apps would consider them as calories from carbohydrates.
Anon
I am so envious because “how can I eat more carbs?” has never, ever been my problem!!