Thursday’s Workwear Report: Embroidered Lace Yoke Blouse
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Sales of note for 2/14/25 (Happy Valentine's Day!):
- Nordstrom – Winter Sale, up to 60% off! 7850 new markdowns for women
- Ann Taylor – Up to 40% off your full-price purchase — and extra 60% off sale
- Banana Republic Factory – 50% off everything + 15% off (readers love their suiting as well as their silky shirts like this one)
- Boden – 15% off new season styles
- Eloquii – 300+ styles $25 and up
- J.Crew – 40% of your purchase – prices as marked
- J.Crew Factory – 50% off entire site and storewide + extra 50% off clearance
- Rothy's – Final Few: Up to 40% off last-chance styles
- Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
- Talbots – Flash sale ending soon – markdowns starting from $15, extra 70% off all other markdowns (final sale)
And some of our latest threadjacks here at Corporette (reader questions and commentary) — see more here!
Some of our latest threadjacks include:
- My workload is vastly exceeding my capability — what should I do?
- Why is there generational resentment regarding housing? (See also)
- What colors should I wear with a deep green sweater dress?
- How do you celebrate milestone birthdays?
- How do you account for one-time expenses in your monthly budget?
- If I'm just starting to feel sick from the flu, do I want Tamilfu?
- when to toss old clothes of a different size
- a list of political actions to take right now
- ways to increase your intelligence
- what to wear when getting sworn in as a judge (congrats, reader!)
- how to break into teaching as a second career
this outfit looks like something my grandma would wear
Yeah…I usually love Elizabeth’s picks, but this is a miss.
IDK – she specifically said she’d style it with a pencil skirt or skinny pants which is what a few other reads suggested. It’s the skirt that’s matched with the blouse that is awful, not the blouse itself.
I don’t know, even with skinny pants, I still think the shirt would have a grandma vibe to me. Some people may be able to pull it off, but not me.
NO I love it, picture it in black or charcoal with leather pants or coated denim
I think a dark color would be nice with a suit.
There are women who like this. Not everyone can be svelte, and we have to be inclusive of all bodily types in the hive. I think it’s great that Elizabeth is so inclusive of our diverse body types. So thank you Elizabeth, for these choices. We do appreciate it. YAY!
+1
The blouse itself is super cute. Especially in some of the darker colors but I do not like it paired with this skirt.
I LOVE that blouse. Just not with that skirt ?
I just bought the blouse but intend to style it very, very differently!
Yes — my instagrammer mom friends would put in on with some light wash high-rise cropped flares and something like Swedish Hasbeens high-heeled clogs and go to down. Some people can just make things work in a way that I would manage to make look like a Great Aunt Ethel reject.
This blouse is only going to look right on someone under 30 with extreme, eye-catching proportions (very tall, super petite, or plus-sized), perfect hair and makeup, and extremely trendy pants and shoes. Anyone 30 or older, average-sized, and/or wearing any other piece that isn’t totally of the moment is going to look incredibly frumpy. The target market for this top is basically the same as the target market for Everlane–young and not-average-looking, people who can take a frumpy style and make it look fabulously intentional.
Aiiiii! I just ordered the cropped cashmere turtleneck from Everlane and I’m pushing 50.
I guess they subliminally code for this, but I did not know that Everlane was not for me!
lol anonymous at 11:02, I think you need to calm down. Plenty of people can wear this blouse (probably styled differently) and not look frumpy.
Way harsh, Tai (11:02).
yes this!!!
Such a cute versatile top, I would do the blush and gray denim or the maroon and dark denim for a casual festive event I love it
Agreed. As a plus sized woman, this would make me look super frumpy!
I think the skirt is the problem…a pair of sharp black pants would look fabulous with this.
Oh, hello, Elizabeth already said so. Don’t mind me!
This blouse isn’t for me personally, but I can totally see a 20-something wear it with ankle pants and a long cardigan. As styled it’s perfect for a Mrs. Doubtfire costume!
That was exactly my thought – my grandma, not even my mom who is almost 80.
I love this blouse, but yes, as Elizabeth suggests styling it, not as the model is wearing it.
My church would like to organize intergenerational dinners to encourage new friendships. The idea is that people who are interested would be assigned together in groups of 3-4 people/family units for 6-12 months, and each unit would take turns hosting.
What’s the easiest way to collect info about people who are interested? A Google form? Name, address, ages, dietary restrictions? The minister will do the matching to make sure young and old are mixed. Thanks!
Hand out cards to be filled out during a couple weeks worth of services and have folks return them during offering.
This. It allows people to sign up immediately instead of having to remember to go fill out a form later.
Then follow up with a call or quick email or text
Plus if you are trying to include elderly folks it’s more accessible and therefore welcoming for them.
This is such a wonderful idea!
I would consider doing both the card suggestion above (which works for those in person and less tech savvy) and if you also have a website/electronic newslietter, offer a google form too (as it might capture a slightly different audience).
Fantastic idea. The repetition will really build relationships. You may want to also ask people their preferred time to meet so the groups have compatible schedules – like you agree to first Sunday, Wednesday, or Saturday.
Has anyone used a paid subscription to Flexjobs? Worth it? Other tips for finding remote work, especially if one is moving from traditional law practice to a law adjacent or JD-preferred type position?
Use linkedin and add the search term “remote.”
What type of work are you looking for?
I’m looking to leave traditional law practice. But I am somewhat limited by where I live and moving will not be an option for at least a few more years. I have several friends and classmates who have moved into JD preferred type jobs that are 100% remote – contract negotiation/compliance type work. I really haven’t job searched since law school a decade ago and all of my legal jobs have pretty much fallen in my lap through my network.
I’ve mentioned this here before but check out the Mom project. I’ve hired a few people from it for project work and have been impressed with many of the resumes. As far as I know thy don’t do much long term work but one of the people I met through that site we ended up hiring as a remote FTE.
Thank you from hiring from the Mom Project. I’m not ready to jump in yet, but it gives me so much hope that it’s there and people are hiring from it.
I’ve gotten some good gigs from FlexJobs and they’re clearly not a scam. That said, I’m not a lawyer or law-adjacent so I have no idea if there’s a better resource for that. You can sign up for just a month’s subscription so you can explore and see if the listings are worth it for you.
I just joined the gym at my work building. It’s a fairly small gym with a section dedicated to cardio machines and a section of weight machines, then a small area for free weights. It’s not huge, about twice the size of a hotel gym.
Confession time, I haven’t worked out at a gym in a number of years. I could use suggestions on where to start. Literally, what would you do if you walked in this morning?
I also started going to my office gym after not working out for a long time. I did Fitness Blender workouts on my phone. I picked 25 minute HIIT videos.
Good for you for doing this!
I like having a set routine – Class Pass Go is free and has voice guided exercises for the treadmill, the elliptical, bikes, etc. I think they also have strength training routines, but I had already paid for a year of SWEAT, so I just use those – there’s different options (body weight, strength focused). My apartment gym sounds similar to yours, and I was able to use the gym based routines with some modifications – I would look over the routine the night before I planned to do it and google any modifications I needed, and then made sure I had a decent form.
+1 I’m a firm believer that when it comes to exercise, the routine is more important than the actual exercises. So if a twenty minute walk on the treadmill with a great podcast is all you can handle right now, do that. That said, I love the sweat app. Bbg was torture for me but I’m LOVING pwr at home. The equipment is really simple and the workouts are short.
PWR was my favorite! I kept giving up on BBG/BBG strong, but loved power. I moved to a fuller gym and am trying Fierce and have been a big fan.
Oh great to know-thanks!
I was getting all excited, but it doesn’t seem like Class Pass Go is still free to non-Class Pass members. Although the $8 a month doesn’t seem too bad at all: https://help.classpass.com/hc/en-us/articles/360010438412-What-is-the-cost-of-Go-
Assuming you haven’t worked out in a number of years, I’d do the following: 10 to 20 minutes of cardio as a warmup (walk, elliptical, run, row) and one of the beginner full-body workouts on Fitness Blender or Aaptiv. If you’re coming to the gym with a higher level of fitness (say you’ve been hiking or running all summer already), I would up the intensity and do an intermediate workout.
+1. Really depends on your fitness level, and seconding Fitness Blender! I have achy joints and stiff muscles, and can only do ~50 mins max. at a time. I have the following routine 3 days a week, and it is enough to wipe me out for the first month or two:
(a) 15 minutes of walk (at 3.2 miles/h) or walk-jog intervals (start with 4.5 minutes of walking, 0.5 minute of slow jogging at 4 miles/h, work my way up to 4 mins walk, 1 min jog, etc…up to 1 min of walking, 4 mins of slow jogging) + warm-up stretches
(b) 2-3 reps of half-crunches, modified leg raises, butt lifts, planks (20 seconds at the start, working up to 1 min),
(c) 2-3 reps of squats or hip hinges,
(d) (if I have energy left over) 2 reps of 10 burpees.
(e) cool-down stretches
There are a ton of different workout apps that can guide you as you get started, I’d recommend trying some different things to find what you like. Aaptiv ($15/mo) is a great audio-based workout program app to get started with, there’s workouts for indoor running/treadmill and other specific pieces of gym equipment. Peloton also has a surprisingly versatile app ($20/mo) if your gym has a good spin bike and a place to set your phone so you can see the screen. And – they don’t stop at spin anymore, though, it has all sorts of workouts from yoga to strength training. Both have stretching and yoga, too. Fit Body by Anna Victoria is also really effective, even though she’s an influencer and very peppy and everything is pink, I’ve tried her stuff and it works.
I absolutely love Aaptiv for audio workouts. I don’t want to have to look at a video as I’m working out. I don’t run, but I use the strength training, pilates, yoga, and stretching workouts.
We are moving to a building with an in-building gym. I am hesitating on joining (it’s walkable now and they are opening it up to us b/c we signed a lease) because I am pushing 50 and haven’t regularly exercised in a while. I would feel really visible trying any serious workout with coworkers and then showering . . . TMI. I feel like I am the only one who feels this way. Yes? No?
I feel the same way. My employer offers a free yoga class weekly, and I don’t participate because I just don’t want to be judged for what I’m wearing or how flexible I am or to be suspected of showing off just because I am not a rank beginner. I do not have the same worries at the gym, where I know plenty of people but don’t work with any of them.
I feel so weird doing squats and lifts and things like that that I just do it at home. I think I just need a distraction. Talking to a friend would be good, but I have nothing like a book to focus my eyes on and hate feeling like I’m people watching in the gym. At home, there is the TV, so I find a Law & Order episode and go to town. I can recumbent bike at the gym with a trashy magazine or book or my phone or play tennis or take a class, but can’t just do my own workout. I feel like this is just a “me” issue.
I would like a cloak of invisibility just for going to the gym. I would do so much more with more intensity if I could just not be seen by others, esp. the Judgey McJudgersons I work with.
Been there, done that…they feel just as awkward as you do. It passes.
You could also try the Nike Running Club and Nike Training Club apps. These aren’t geared towards elliptical machines or spin bikes, but there are many free guided workouts that use bodyweight and minimal equipment like dumbbells.
+1
Here to say the exact same thing. I’m a fan of the Nike Training app. It’s free and has video work outs, whatever you are interested in, from 8 minutes to an hour, for full body, or just the abs or shoulders. Just pick and plug in your headphones. Don’t worry about spending too much time looking at your phone. People at the gym don’t have time to care, and you have things to do. Get your bearing, get a good form, and soon, you’ll get your groove and favourite pace.
The girls mentioning ROUTINE are spot on, as well. I am not a body builder, but have been going to the gym consistently for nearly 10 years (1 hour, 2-3x a week, usually on Monday, Wednesday and Friday). I do take breaks when I travel (I’d rather look at Portugal than look for gyms in Portugal), but when you are back home, routine at the gym is helpful.
1) Warm up (5-10 minutes)
2) Main exercise period
– Strength work out of your choice (here is where Nike Training videos comes in handy)
– Cardio of your choice (explore the different equipments: treadmill, elliptical, bikes, stair climbers, etc. Go run outside if you prefer!)
3) Cool down (5-10 minutes)
How long are you hoping work outs to be? An hour? More? Less?
Since you say you haven’t been in years, I’d say don’t be hard on yourself, just get started.
20 minutes isn’t a waste, you can bring your heart rate up and get moving. Your future older self with thank you.
30 minutes can be great, and some gyms offer half hour fitness classes, great for lunch hours, and getting a lot of good cardio/strength work done in little time. The classes are also good, because it can familiarize you with exercises that you like and would be willing to do on your own during your individual work out time.
Don’t be afraid to smile and talk to the people working out if you happen to cross paths. You don’t have to take off your headphones and make a million best buds at the gym, but if you get changed next to the same lady every week, it won’t hurt you to tell her that she has nice shoes. Over the long run, it can be good encouragement and accountability, sometimes even sweet networking opportunities.
If the gym has a free consultation for personal training, go for it. They can help you identify opportunities for improvement. Just be true to yourself and know what you want going in to the meeting, because as any industry, they are trying to sell you a service, notably a PT subscription. If you want them to walk through use of machines, say so, and say no thank you when comes the sales time. I do understand though that small gyms may not offer this walk through service, no worries, nothing to lose in asking.
If you do want a PT, 6 months to a year can be helpful in getting you consistent results and accountability. Just make sure that you remember the routine that you created, or you’ll be back to square one when you start working out on your own again.
I wish you the greatest success as you explore the gym! Most importantly, be kind to yourself and listen to your body. Some days are victorious work outs. Some days are look at the treadmill, turn around and go home days. That’s okay, just try again tomorrow. Working women easily try to do everything, surpassing what is reasonable for a 24 hour day. As much as exercise is a priority, balance and rest needs to be one, too! I wish you the best as you incorporate all of it into your schedule!
I would start with just walking or jogging on a treadmill or elliptical. You can move on to all the apps and more complicated workouts later.
+1
Just walk or jog on the treadmill until you get used to actually being in the gym.
Ok I went. It was fine. I signed up for an assessment and orientation, which is in the future, so today I did 20 min on the treadmill using one of their built in “fat burning” programs (a series of different inclines) and then I used the leg machines.
The towels are tiny so I need to remember to bring some kind of robe – do you guys do that? The showers are all the way across the women’s locker room from the actual lockers.
I remembered a few more things I need to put in my gym bag, like a hairbrush – duh! – but overall it was fine and I feel pretty good and energized, if still mildly sweaty despite the shower. I think we will call it “dewy” ;)
No robe, I don’t want to put that in my bag damp/wet and lug it around. I usually hang the undergarments I’m changing into by the shower, dry off super well, hair up in towel, under garments on, and then walk back to locker. I’m not in the camp of worrying about coworkers at the gym in any capacity, but keep in mind that if they’re in the locker room, they’re probably naked, too. No one is looking.
Good for you! I wish my office had a gym and it was okay to actually use it during the day.
I am looking to upgrade my Fitb!t Alta. Does anyone have a Versa and have a recommendation? Trying to decide between the Lite,2, etc versions.
I just upgraded to the Versa 3, primarily because I wanted the guided breathing sessions.
Oh wait, sorry, just realized I have the Charge 3, not the Versa 3.
Piggybacking onto this question – does anyone have a small clip on pedometer/calorie counter that they like? I had a Fitbit zip for years, and it finally died over the summer. I replaced it with the Fitbit Charge 3, but I am really not liking having a large, tight thing on my wrist. And I don’t need guided meditation, heart rate etc. – just a fairly accurate steps/calories readout. I would love to go back to something like the Fitbit Zip, but haven’t found something similar, and the Zips available on eBay, etc. are really pricey.
We bought my MIL this one: https://www.amazon.com/Omron-HJ-112-Digital-Pocket-Pedometer/dp/B0000U1OCI/ref=asc_df_B0000U1OCI/?tag=hyprod-20&linkCode=df0&hvadid=309806240144&hvpos=1o3&hvnetw=g&hvrand=10563624798033086597&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=c&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9007738&hvtargid=pla-525674160476&psc=1 and she loves it. She didn’t want a Fitbit and she isn’t techy at all. My Amazon purchase history says we bought it in 2013 and it’s still going strong. I know I’ve replaced the battery for her, but not very frequently. And I know it’s gone through the washer at least once and that she’s dropped it a few times. It’s larger than the Zip but not by much.
Ugh. I need a new chunky wool / cashmere turtleneck as a replacement for a old one that is due to be retired if only I can replace it. I have a really petite torso, so many brands even in petite are just too long. And I’m otherwise a size 4/6 with generous size 8 hips so even kids sizes won’t work. This would be something to wear to work with pants or pencil skirts so proportion is everything. I’ve struck out at lands end, banana, and Uniqlo so far. Help!
Have a look at the Free People Cozy Cashmere Turtleneck. It comes in black and it’s sooooo soft and it’s not too long. I’d give you a link but something weird is going on with their website.
I just bought a chunky black turtleneck at Gap Factory. I have no idea how the sizes will run for you but you might get lucky (and they had a slightly different style at regular Gap too).
Not OP but thanks for the tip! I’ve been in the market for a couple chunky sweaters but I can’t stand wool.
I’ve seen a handful at Nordstrom that I liked but thought “huh, that looks too short in the torso”. Any of these?
https://shop.nordstrom.com/s/topshop-banana-sleeve-funnel-neck-sweater/5458401?origin=category-personalizedsort&breadcrumb=Home%2FWomen%2FClothing%2FSweaters&color=beige
https://shop.nordstrom.com/s/madewell-donegal-evercrest-coziest-yarn-turtleneck-sweater-regular-plus-size/5354781?origin=category-personalizedsort&breadcrumb=Home%2FWomen%2FClothing%2FSweaters&color=donegal%20blush
These have buttons on the side so you could unbutton the bottom one for hip accommodation:
https://shop.nordstrom.com/s/madewell-mock-neck-side-button-pullover-sweater-regular-plus-size/5352685?origin=category-personalizedsort&breadcrumb=Home%2FWomen%2FClothing%2FSweaters&color=true%20black
https://shop.nordstrom.com/s/1901-side-button-sweater-regular-petite/5038889?origin=category-personalizedsort&breadcrumb=Home%2FWomen%2FClothing%2FSweaters&color=yellow
I feel like many of the Madewell, Topshop, and Everlane sweaters at Nordstrom are short this fall.
Aritizia (this includes Babaton and Wilfred). I have their Montpellier sweater in three colours plus a longer version that works as a dress. Super warm, very comfortable and depending on how formal your office is, dressy enough with a nice skirt. I’m also very petite, with a short torso and these sweaters are a godsend.
Banana Republic
She said she’s already tried that.
Oh, whoops, I just saw Uniqlo in that sentence. That’s strange, because I feel like BR has A LOT of sweaters that fit this bill.
Try to find another one on eBay or Poshmark. I’ve sometimes had success replacing old, well-loved items with barely worn ones.
Hello! I posted yesterday afternoon re All Saints bags. No responses though. Any experience with this brand re bag quality? Thanks!
i have one of their smooth leather ones in a light gray color. Overall I like it, but it seems to get color transferred to it like no other bag I have. A magic eraser always cleans it up, but I just find it weird. So, I might not would buy that color/smooth leather combo again.
Rent the Runway has the bag you mentioned – you could rent it for a week to see if you like it.
I think you didn’t get any replies because your post sounded incredibly spammy
Nah, bro, it’s because it’s the afternoon thread.
Cool story, bro
I have the AllSaints Fin convertible backpack. I bought it over a year ago and carried it all through last year’s winter, and it’s held up really well so far. It’s got a lot of hardware so seems like it would have a lot of points for failure (at least, that’s my experience with bags) but so far no issues. I will say that for some reason, AllSaints leather seems 50% heavier to me than other equivalent bags. Might not be a problem for the size you’re looking for but it’s something I always notice.
Hmm. This shirt (especially in that polyeter crepe) was exactly my style in 2010-2014 for work- paired with Gap black work pants and round toe ballet flats. I’m not sure I would go back to it now, and I definitely wouldnt pay $70 for it- this is a $24.99 at Ann Taylor/Loft clearance kind of shirt. I’m especially sure that the cotton eyelet stuff will curl up after first washing and never lay flat again – at 24 I didnt think it was a big deal but at 34 I wouldnt go to work in it.
Completely agree. Ten years ago, I would have liked this; now, it’s being purged from my closet.
I’ve been seeing a lot of lace in workwear lately. It reminds me of my early professional days too. I’m kind of digging it.
I am ready for an upgrade in my coffee situation. I love, love the ridiculous pour overs in a lot of coffee shops. they are SO expensive, though. I think I would like to replicate it at home. That way on the weekend or in the afternoons i could make myself a delectible cup of coffee. But, then someone suggested I get a machine that will ground beans and make a one cup for me. And i know some people have contraptions like this – maybe even with a milk frother?
So, any recommendations for
coffee bean grinder
pour over stuff
or coffee maker for one cup of deliciousness?
I know – this is vague. I guess I am not really sure what I want and looking for a broad range of recommendations and explanations as to why you have what you have so I can make up my mind?
I love pour over and have it every day! Here’s what you need:
Kettle – I’d recommend getting an electric one. They can be really pricey, but honestly the Hamilton Beach one I bought at Target works fine.
Grinder – I have a simple electric KitchenAid grinder that works fine.
Pour over – Again, a Target find; I have no idea which brand, but search “porcelain pour over cone” and that should get you there. I used a plastic cone for a long time but thought it was probably better to not pour hot water on plastic.
Filters – The cones use #2 filters, which you should be able to get at your grocery store. Coffee experts recommend white bleached filters for the best taste. I personally don’t notice a difference between bleached and unbleached filters so YMMV.
If you want to make more than a single cup of pour over, then you’ll need a Chemex. It has special filters. This does make great coffee, but it takes awhile. DH and I rarely use the Chemex – only when we’re hosting people for breakfast. Otherwise, we just use 2 cones and heat up that much water. It also allows for flexibility if we want different things.
Lastly, explore your local roasters! That’s where you’ll get the best beans.
I made myself a little coffee station in my bedroom, on a bookshelf. I also use a relatively inexpensive Hamilton Beach electric kettle that holds 1.75 liters of water and boils up very quickly.
The OXO BREW Single Serve Pour Over Coffee Dripper with Auto-Drip Water Tank that costs about $16 and works with #2 filters. The best part of this is that it has a separate water tank that sit on top of the plastic filter cone. So I fill the tank with exactly enough water for my large cup and it drips through evenly and quickly.
I got a big airtight glass jar and filled it with really good fresh coffee beans that are already ground, so I don’t have to deal with the mess of grinding them myself. I go through it pretty quickly so it doesn’t get stale. And a cute red coffee scoop just for fun,
I buy the Land-o-Lakes Mini-Moos shelf-stable half & half at Target so I don’t have to go downstairs to the fridge for half & half. There’s a dedicated waste basket next to the shelf for the disposal of the grinds, filter, and the Mini Moos packages.
It has revolutionized my mornings!!
How do you get past a workout slump? I typically work out five times a week, for mental health reasons in addition to my physical well-being. For the past 3-4 weeks, I’ve been really resistant to working out and have been having a hard time getting started on ANY of it. I usually run 3 times a week and do either yoga or strength training on the other two days. Anyway, I’ve been blowing off about half of my workouts because I feel physically and mentally drained from a busy season at work and at home. Yet skipping workouts makes me feel physically worse, plus I then feel guilty for not taking care of myself.
Can you change up your running route or try a new yoga class?
I try to treat exercise like vegetables. I may not be in the mood for it all the time, but my body still needs vegetables daily or most days of the week.
I have this happen to and typically try to force myself not to workout when it happens but to still be active. So during those times I’ll work in a couple longer walks or a game of tennis or a weekend hike. Or I’ll reach out to a friend and suggest we try an overpriced studio class (I normally stick to my gym). Eventually I always find that I get back into my gym habit after a week or two.
Are you getting enough sleep and eating enough? I can only drag myself to the gym if I am well rested and well fueled.
I feel this way, too. I had a migraine on Monday night and my workout routine has been off for the rest of the week. Hoping to go to the gym and hit the treadmill tonight.
Wow, are you me? Following but no advice I’m afraid. I’m not sure whether it’s just that it’s getting darker outside or that I’m more depressed than usual, but I’m having such a hard time motivating myself to work out lately. It’s to the point of canceling one of my personal training appointments last week because I just didn’t have it in me to give the effort.
Get a friend or SO to be an accountability partner.
I would set a goal, like running a half marathon or going on an amazing ski trip. That’s always so much more motivating to me than “I should work out because it’s good for you” and it’s easier to be disciplined (which is the real issue) when you’re excited about something.
I wish this worked for me.
Signed,
Someone who has run and finished multiple ultras way undertrained (but slower than I could if I trained properly!!)
This happened to me this past Spring. I worried about losing muscle/gaining weight but I stopped lifting completely for 2-3 months. I used the elliptical and stair master instead for half an hour, watched tv on my phone during it. On days I didn’t even feel like doing that, I tried to take my dog for an extra long walk. I’d take a break, and listen to what your body wants to do. I was worried that I’d slowly slip out of shape, but one day in July I just felt like lifting again- surprisingly enough I didn’t lose any of my strength and actually was more motivated to run a few miles a week on top of it. Give yourself some slack, maybe eat a little less (if you’re worried about weight gain) for days you don’t workout because your body doesn’t need as many nutrients.
Not OP but as indicated above I’ve been struggling with the same thing and I think this is exactly the advice I need. Thanks!
I think this is the best thing you can do. Take your workouts down a notch — you won’t lose too much muscle or stamina if you slow down in the short term. And you may be more motivated to get to the gym or go outside if you know the activity is going to be a little less intense. Listen to your body!
Can you take your workouts outside? Fresh air and some sunshine might help.
Talk about this with a friend that lives in your city/proximity and is already active in workout out. See if you can work out together next week, and book yourselves in for a new fitness class the week after. Make it a coffee date after both sessions so that you can talk about this issue.
It’s a touch change to go from feeling very active to less active, but I am glad to hear that you haven’t stopped exercising completely, which is huge. This funk will definitely pass. A few scheduled appointments to exercise with a friend will also help, and give you a chance to talk about this after wards with someone who loves you and cares about you.
Good luck! :)
This is often a sign of boredom for me. Can you try new online videos or DVDs? Beachbody on Demand has a million great videos, many of which are ~30 minutes.
Also, as a fellow mood=exercise person, make sure you’re getting enough sunlight as the days have gotten shorter. SAD can be no joke.
Sounds like your body is telling you it needs a rest. Listen to it.
Try not to stress about it and just go when you can…you will get back into the routine when you are ready.
This was the first sign of my second pregnancy. Obviously could be any number of other things for you, but your post reminded me of that and I thought I would share!
Thanks for all the advice, ladies. I do think it’s some combination of SAD, the much cooler weather suddenly (I do outdoor workouts whenever I can), a busy season, and just being plain tired. I guess I have to remember that something is better than nothing, even if it’s a walk instead of a run. I am a solo exerciser, but I hear you that taking a class with a friend might help kick-start things again.
I wish I could figure out how to have a full life without exhausting myself, but that’s a whole other topic. Sometimes I feel like I’m way more prone to burnout — of every variety — than most people. :(
I replied above that I’m having similar workout issues and I feel you so much on all of this, especially the second paragraph. I really wish I were a high-energy person but I’m just…not. I believe it is hereditary and depression-related, and it sucks. I have no vitamin deficiencies, am on a good SSRI, work out, eat healthy, sleep plenty, and I’m still just tired all the time no matter what I do.
You can try going for a walk (preferably outside) on the days you don’t feel like working out. You will still get some movement, but it doesn’t exactly feel like a workout. Call your mom, an out of town friend, etc. and the time will pass quickly!
I get a few new workout outfits. That usually cheers me up.
My employer is very stingy with sick time (3 days total) and is also opposed to working from home any more than the minimum amount allowed in our policy (which is 1x/month). This is for ideological reasons, not because our work actually requires us to be in the office. I’m home sick with a bad cold, but I don’t have enough sick time left to just take the day off and I suspect (based on the tone of some of the emails I received) that my boss doesn’t like that I’m working from home. How can I say “trust me, I’d take the day off if you actually gave a reasonable amount of sick time” without burning bridges? I’m worried they’re going to make me take unpaid leave instead of just letting me do my job from home today.
Girl, get a new job. They’d rather have you there spreading germs to others, even people who may be immunocompromised (or have immunocompromised people or very small children at their homes)? Life is too short for that ish.
Could not agree more. I’ve skipped events (for which I had tickets in advance, like the symphony) when I could go, but was contagious with something that immunocompromised, elderly, or pregnant people would not want to get.
I’m OP and I forgot to mention that I’m the one who is immunocompromised! Not only do I have to take it seriously when I get sick, even with a cold, I’m constantly on edge when other people come in sick because they too are out of sick time. I do everything I can to prevent it, but there’s only so much you can do in an open/cube office space.
You need a new job then. You can’t change all these people. Easier to change the job.
Yeah, this job is just not a good fit for you!
OP – you (or someone else with only 3 sick days a year) posted this question a few weeks ago and the answer was unanimous – get a new job.
You polish your resume and start your exit strategy. I’m so sorry that your employer doesn’t value their employees. I really am. You can try to argue out of it now, but long term this job does not care about you. And so you shouldn’t care about it either. Stories like this makes me so mad.
+1
I empathize with your lack of sick leave, but I’m not sure saying “trust me, I’d take the day off if you actually gave a reasonable amount of sick time” is helpful. That suggests that you’re not actually well enough to work and you’re “working” from home, rather than actually working from home (and I say this as someone who works from home a lot and believes more employers should allow remote work). Is this your 1 official wfh day per month? If so, I would emphasize that you’re healthy enough to be working and are in fact working at home, but you’re not in the office because you’re contagious and you don’t want to make others sick.
Sorry about the stingy sick leave, that really sucks.
No, the official WFH day is on a set schedule so I’m taking this as “extra.” The only alternatives I see are coming in and getting everyone else in the cube farm sick (and this is definitely contagious since I clearly caught it from a close friend this week) or taking unpaid leave, which doesn’t feel fair when I can easily do fully productive work from home with some coughing breaks. I know I’m pushing the boundaries with what is allowable re: WFH, but I’m actually sick, not just faking it or trying to finagle a vacation day, and I’m not sure what else I can do.
You have two options: (a) protest, stay home and work, and risk repercussions or (b) go with the policy, go in, get everyone else sick because, hey that’s your policy, mr manager, if you’re inconvenienced by everyone else’s illnesses that’s your problem.
So, what would the repercussions be if you stay home and work? Just a boss that is going to have a temporary grudge or something more major that would compel you to go in? I don’t think anything you say over email is going to change the mind of someone THAT stingy with sick time and WFH on a matter of principle in this day and age, sorry.
Also, find a new job? This is not sustainable, and you’re surely going to have this same problem on an ongoing basis.
I say ignore your boss’ weird tone and keep doing what you’re doing.
I assume you have separate sick and vacation time – are they so persnickety that they won’t let you use vacation when you run out of sick time? Or are they equally stingy with all types of leave?
I’d go to work and make sure I touched everything the boss needs to use, and coughed and sneezed in his presence so he gets sick!! (Not really but it would serve him right). Sorry you have to deal with this :(
You took my idea!
Could be a her. I had a boss like this in my previous job and it was maddening. She was suspicious of everyone who reported to her, and had a deep and abiding discomfort with the concept of working from home. Except when, y’know, she wanted to do it. (Eye roll)
I would get a doctor’s note that specifies that you have additional concerns and that the doctor recommends that you WFH as needed. Seems like a reasonable accommodation to me. I assume you are in the US.
Thanks all. If nothing else, this thread is validating. My boss is now suggesting that I should be taking vacation time instead (I guess she’d like me to cancel my upcoming actual vacation or something?) even though I am capable of putting in a full day. I’m out of here.
Idk what’s hard to get. You have used up all your sick days. You aren’t allowed to work from home. Yes. You must cancel a day of vacation or not get paid. Welcome to reality.
Thanks, you’re so very helpful!
I mean, it completely utterly sucks and is insanely unreasonable, but also it is policy, presumably one you had access to when you took the job. So I don’t get the surprise/reaction of boss’s response. Her request is in line with company policy.
Find a new job and consider the benefits package a little more closely given the context you now have when you take the next one.
I’m not sure what other kind of answer you were looking for?
Yeah, I shouldn’t have been so quick to be snippy in my response at 12:01. It’s just really frustrating because I was led to believe they were more flexible on WFH when I joined (“you can WFH one day a month! No, it’s not a problem if you have to wait for a package delivery or go to the doctor on another day!”) and now I’m being punished for it. I anticipate a hit in my performance review despite really high quality of work (and putting in a lot of work!). Feeling so sick and tired and frustrated.
I get that. I hope if you decide to look for a new job you find somewhere that is actually reasonable about this! Only three days of sick leave is insane.
I think this is the boss chiming in. I used to work for you. I quit and threw you under the bus at the exit interview. Sounds like this person will do the same thing.
This is a company-wide policy, presumably, so they have clearly decided they DO NOT care if they lose employees because of it. Even if you mention it in an exit interview, they’re not going to be throwing anybody under any buses.
Well, technically they’ve lost people over this before and have cared (and apparently been surprised), but the big boss is very, very stubborn on this issue. She gets mad when people leave over it but doesn’t seem willing to change anything. There are two other people I know of at work who are also getting really frustrated, one of whom desperately needs a little flexibility due to a complicated elder care issue – wouldn’t be surprised if all three of us left.
This is a stupendously unhelpful and unnecessarily hostile response. Congratulations, you win the “jerk of the day” award. I am sure your mother would be very proud.
Uhh yeah sorry, but if your employer doesn’t give much sick leave, you have to use vacation days when you’re sick. That’s what adults do. A lot of employers don’t even break sick/vacation leave into separate pots. I think this is one of these “tell me I don’t have to cancel my planned vacation” tr0lls.
I don’t think this is a tr0ll but coming here to chime in that my employer is one of those that lumps sick leave and vacation into one bucket. It’s the worst.
It works better for some people than others. I prefer to have it lumped together because I’m young, healthy, single, and prefer to use my time on vacations. I totally get why it’s worse for people with other circumstances, though.
Yeah I don’t think I took a sick day from ages 22 to 31, so I definitely came out way ahead when it was all in one bucket. Now I have kids and I take 20+ sick days/year between kid’s illnesses and me getting sick from kid’s illnesses, so I’m SUPER grateful for separate buckets. I could literally never take vacation if they were combined.
I think the point is, if the bucket is big enough, and the promised WFH is reasonably accommodated, it shouldn’t matter, and a single PTO bucket gives each individual employee more flexibility. There was one stretch of 4 days in the past three years where I came down with something so bad that I was sick enough I couldn’t work most of a day. As a single/childless, let me plan for and take my summer Fridays or half-days honestly, I always save a few days just in case for sick time or if I were to get injured in one of the sports I play, and use them around Xmas if I didn’t need them. We’re adults, we can parse out how to best use the days the company is willing to pay us to not be there.
This is absurd and I’m sorry it’s happening. You need a new gig. This policy is reason enough to leave. I can’t imagine these people are otherwise pleasant and reasonable. Start job searching today and maybe you won’t have to cancel that vacation after all. Good luck!
Yep. You have a cold. Go into work or expect they’re going to make you take leave, per their policy. If you don’t like it find a new job.
Hey, does it burn you up inside that Kat is apparently holding your two-line snarky, hostile posts until very late in the morning before letting them through mod? Because I’d lay dollars to donuts you’re the poster that always has to be first to add a ridiculously hostile, inappropriate response to any post that happens to appear. I bet it is burning you up inside! And I love it!
Not the person you’re responding to, but this comment wasn’t caught in m*d…it’s been here all afternoon. I don’t think it’s snarky, just blunt and practical advice – this is the jobs policy for better or worse. The only recourse here is finding a new job.
Do you have 3 days sick and the rest is PTO? They probably expect you to burn PTO when you go over your 3 days sick (which is probably mandated by law – do you work in CA by any chance?)
I know it sucks to use PTO when you’re sick but it sounds like that’s what you need to do. I personally hate the concept of PTO but it seems like every workplace does it now. It’s the same at my workplace.
Just to clarify for the non-Californians….
California mandates that a minimum of three days of separate sick leave from PTO is provided for full time employees.
So at my company, which is in multiple states, everyone gets the same PTO bank of days but the Californians get three extra days of sick time only.
This has had the counterintuitive effect of causing more complaining among the Californians because three sick days feels so chintzy, and because they expect all their PTO to be vacations where in other states the employees just know their PTO is both sick and vacation.
I get that you’re mad but using up all your PTO by October when you know you only have three days of sick was kinda poor planning. I feel for you and it sounds like your boss is kind of a jerk about it, but if you and all the other employees are working under the same set of rules, it does seem like you’re missing more work than the rest of them.
I mean, that can happen. I have an inherited primary immune deficiency, and no matter what precautions I take, I’m going to get sick more than other people, even if nothing is going around (because I can become infected by stuff that always exists in everyone’s body). There’s no medical treatment that isn’t worse than the condition itself (since it’s one of the milder primary immune deficiencies). It’s not a particularly rare condition.
It sounds like you need to find a job with more WFH flexibility. I am a big believer in flexible working, and have been a leader in pushing for it at prior employers, but there are some companies (like my current one) that just won’t budge. It takes valuable employees leaving the company for just this reason to turn the tides. Make sure you tell them that in your exit interview.
Anon at 2:04, it sounds like you and I (OP) have similar conditions and are in the same boat. It sucks and we do need WFH flexibility, which I clearly can’t get at the level I thought when I interviewed. Time to move on for sure.
I need a new everyday backpack and am hoping one of y’all have a recommendation.
I’m looking for something comfortable, durable, and reasonably structured: I need to be able to bike with it, but I also want to look polished taking it into meetings. Should be big enough for my lunch, a 15-inch laptop, and other day-to-day stuff like pump parts, spare sweater, etc. Side pocket for water a plus. Prefer jewel tones rather than black or gray, and prefer water resistant if not waterproof. Willing to spend up to $200 but would rather stay under $100.
I really liked the look of the Nordace Siena (link to follow), but further research indicates that this brand isn’t especially reputable. Sigh.
I’ve heard great things about the Everlane backpack, though it’s in a range black/gray/cream tones.
https://nordace.com/en/product/nordace-siena-smart-backpack/?attribute_pa_color=beige&alg_currency=USD&gclid=CjwKCAjw9L_tBRBXEiwAOWVVCePUlukVw3eDfzKFM197qIosfj5wkZ3i57O8n2ZTpTmhwGGsb5Iu3xoCEUkQAvD_BwE
I was looking for the same thing as you. I got the Brooks Dalston 20L in olive a few months ago and I love it so far. It is both durable on a bike and attractive at lawyerly events.
Check out the Away backpack. The Lo & Sons Rowledge checks all your boxes but is more expensive — if you like it, you might be able to get it under $300 on Black Friday. Still a lot of $$ though.
I was looking for something somewhat similar (comfortable backpack that would look okay in meetings) although admittedly more for plane travel than biking. Full disclosure I do not own this yet, but I settled on this one I think for my wish list: https://www.thenorthface.com/shop/womens-isabella-backpack-nf0a3ky9?from=subCat&variationId=F0Y&pmx&utm_medium=remarketing&utm_source=fb&utm_term=7dayatctest1&utm_campaign=remarketdpa19&utm_content=ecomm#hero=8
I can’t tell if it’s water resistant.
So I’m starting to think of what I need/want to buy around Black Friday/Cyber Monday as I like to have a list ready to go — if you’re tech savvy please help. What am I looking for? When I travel personally or for very short work trips, I don’t love to take a laptop. Some of it is weight (even though they’re light now), some of it is that with one carryon + one personal item, you have to make a laptop + charger fit in your purse basically. I’ve noticed on flights and Amtrak that some people will pull out something that looks like a tablet but with a keyboard. I have a (very old) iPad but what others are using looks way more sophisticated than that.
Here’s what I need — internet access; access to Word and Excel (I have an Office 365 subscription at home so IDK if that gives me multiple licenses, or if not I’d be ok with downloading Word/Excel like programs from some app so long as they could later “convert” to Word/Excel files on a computer); a keyboard; a built in mouse is ok — as I don’t even use an external mouse on my work laptop; super light/thin but sturdy enough and able to stand being wiped down since I’d be using it on planes; IDK how much memory I need; something that costs $400 MAX though if it’s lower than that, it’s fine. I’m really just looking for the ability to check email/use Word/Excel/internet while carrying minimal stuff.
What am I looking for? What products do you have that you like or dislike?
You want the Microsoft Surface Pro, but I’m not sure they will be under $400, even on Black Friday.
You definitely want the Surface Pro. They are wonderful!
I have a Surface Pro for work and absolutely despise it. It’s had multiple technical issues. It has a weird folding kickstand thing that makes it impossible to prop open on your lap and difficult to use on an airplane tray table. I much prefer my personal Mac laptop, which is just as thin and light and has a smaller power adapter and a better battery life.
Same. I hate having to use it on a solid surface — sometimes I want the keyboard but on my lap or some other arrangement.
Mac laptops are more powerful than what OP needs and about three times more expensive.
I considered Surface Pro and had the same concern about not actually being able to use it in my lap. I would check them out in person if you think you might go that route (BestBuy usually has one on display). I ended up getting the Lenovo Yoga X1; it is way outside of your budget, OP, but Lenovo does have cheaper tablet/laptop convertibles that might be worth checking out.
The Surface Pro is soo slow, it drowe me mad working on one for a few months. And forget about task switching, It dies if you have more than a few spreadsheets open at the same time.
You’re probably seeing people with a 2-in-1 — a surface pro, ipad pro, or something like a dell latitude 2-in-1 (my current work computer, which is a full computer that looks like and feels like a tablet)
A chromebook would probably check all these boxes for you though if all you want is word processing and browsing and they’re frequently much lighter than traditional laptops, and you can find them very cheap, especially on black friday.
At that price point I think you’re going to be limited to Chromebooks/Netbooks. I had one for a while but found that it was kind of annoying to use because it had very limited storage and was a bit clunky to use when not connected to the internet since it’s designed to leverage Google’s cloud. That said, they may be better now.
OP here — ok let’s expand the price point — it isn’t set in stone. Let’s say up to $1000 but I’d still like to be on the lower end bc this will just be an “additional” tech product that won’t be used daily. Thanks for the ideas so far.
Best Buy has surface pros for $699 right now, you may get a little cheaper than that if you wait for holiday sales.
I have a surface pro for work and my kids have chromebook they use at home. Either one works well enough for internet browsing, using Word, Excel, etc. The Chromebook does have limited storage and my kids mostly save things on google classroom so that hasn’t been an issue. But you could just take a USB flash drive if storage is an issue. I haven’t had any problems with my surface pro. It is kind of weird to stand up when using more as a laptop than a tablet.
iPad Pro, with keyboard. Probably still slightly above your price range, but mine was worth every penny. I do not travel with my laptop anymore ever–I used my iPad Pro for everything. It’s my laptop, notebook (Goodnotes + apple pencil), book (Kindle app), TV/movie theater, etc.
I love my LG Gram laptop (mine has a 13 inch screen, but fancier models goes up to 17) for throwing into my tote or backpack and working anywhere. I’ve used it to work on trains, planes, outside on picnics (don’t ask) for 6 years and it’s held up great. At around 2 pounds it’s really easy to lug around, and super thin. It will probably be closer to $1000 price point though. Older models might run a bit cheaper, newer 17 inch models will be much more expensive. They come in a variety of grades — I have the cheapest one (pentium, minimal storage) and have never had an issue working remote.
With a Chromebook, you could work in Docs, Sheets, and Slides in the cloud, then download later. It’s practically all I use now.
Any recommendations for how to mix more protein or protein powder into my breakfast without making it taste awful? I’m getting sick of smoothies and all kinds of eggs. Recs for specific recipes or protein powders also very much welcome!
Greek yogurt or cottage cheese
Kodiak cakes
Kodiak Cakes pancake mix.
I use the Aldi protein powder. I mix it into overnight oats and somehow it tastes better the next day than it does if I mix it in with hot oatmeal. My normal recipe is: 1/2 c oats, 1 c milk, chia seeds, 1/4 cup greek yogurt, scoop choc protein powder, tbsp PB2. I’ve also seen people blend vanilla powder with chai concentrate and some milk or a no sugar added nut milk alternative and a banana.
Google “swole oats” – basically overnight oats with things added to be especially protein-y. She says not to make them with steel-cut oats, but I’ve found that if I use the Bob’s Mill “quick” steel-cut oats (they are cut more finely than normal steel-cut oats) they work well and I like the texture.
Overnight oats! There are tons of online recipes.
Or one of those cheese and salami packs.
My rec for this is always to expand your definition of breakfast food. Some less-processed deli meat wrapped around spinach is a healthy on-the-go meal that’ll get you a ton of protein.
Hi Hive – thoughts on the Tippi sweater from J Crew? I’m thinking about making it a key element of my work “uniform” – ie. buy it in multiple different colours. I’m noticing that chunky sweaters seem to be in this year…but does a classic thinner crew neck ever go out of style?
TIA!
I live in the deep south, so chunky sweaters are not an option most of the time. I have done what you done- I have the Tippi in multiple colors and wear them all the time. I only had a problem with one of them getting a hole, but no problems otherwise. I do not wash them every time I wear them though.
The Tippi is pretty classic IMHO. 10 years ago, I paired it with “pencil skirt and statement necklace.” Then “ankle pants and pendant necklace.” Now I’m wearing mine over silky blouses with either ankle pants or wider leg pants.
Beware the lighter colors (somewhat sheer) and printed styles (cheaply done, so if for example the sweater is stretched slightly over the bust, you can see the lighter “valleys” of the knit that weren’t printed with the pattern).
I am still living in Tippis (and the Factory Teddies). I don’t think they go out of style for work. I’m still wearing Merino ones from ten years ago that look new.
I just bought a couple of these and am actually wearing one right now! Got the suggestion from a coworker who uses it as part of her “uniform.” It’s extremely comfortable and a nice balance between breathable and warm. It’s also very easy to dress up or down… it works great with jeans for causal Friday and also looks sharp with a structured skirt or more formal pants.
I will say that I personally dislike the chunky sweater look for work… it reads very casual to me, and frankly isn’t flattering on most body types. But you do you!
Can someone help me be more efficient?
Today, I am dealing with an ongoing issue at work, that came up this morning and has to be resolved this morning — I have to speak to Person A then Person B and Person C, in that order, and then back to Person A, before I can do the thing that needs to be done. I’ve managed to track down and speak to Person A, and have reached out to Person B and am waiting to hear back. While I’m waiting by the phone, I am having the hardest time getting anything else done. I walked in with a full to do list of things that are of higher order of long term importance, but they require more concentration than I seem to be able to muster. The constant task switching, and having my brain be half on one thing and half on another, is hard. I feel like I’ve done nothing today. And there are so many days that go by like this, super busy but nothing getting actually accomplished.
Does anyone have any advice?
Following because this is my life. Really interested in input from others.
Same. This is more challenging than any concept I have ever been presented with in my law practice.
FWIW, OP, I was recently diagnosed with ADHD.
This is a tough one, and I’ve been there. I break my to-do list down by project and into very actionable items, as minute as a I possibly can. I work on things based on big-picture priority level, and then deadline. I work in business development so I’m literally always waiting for a call or 7, and working on 10 or more different client projects at a time. In my world, the actual “to do” could be as short as “Client A Proposal”. But, that seems like a lot of work, and I might forget what I did and didn’t do before I’ve picked up the call from Person B and spent 20 mins on the phone. So I break it down basically to the extreme, so I can cross a couple small things off but pick back up anytime:
– Get data from Client A
– Input data into model
– Review outputs
– Draft proposal, insert outputs
– Send to Coworker X for review
– Set up meeting with Client A
– Get back from Coworker X no later than ___day
– Finalize and package proposal
– Send proposal to Client A
This happens to me a lot (a chronically understaffed and generally-bad-at-time-management department will do that to you) and my number one tip is SET AN ALARM. If you called B and got no answer, write yourself a note and/or set a calendar reminder. “Bug B about Thing by 4:00 pm if no response.” Then you can safely pour your entire energy into doing something else, knowing that either B will call you or 4:00 pm will roll around, the alarm will go off and you will remember to get in touch with B again. I do this all the time.
I asked a similar question here once and everyone said I had ADHD. No advice, just commiseration. I still struggle with this.
I totally hear that but I have no issues concentrating on tasks when I’m not half-waiting for something else or not getting constantly interrupted!
Thank you for all the responses so far — I’ll check back for more later.
I can’t get real work done in this scenario. Great time to clean your offfice, empty your inbox and file emails, do a CLE, write a fluffy client update article, or take care of life stuff like setting up appointments or online holiday shopping.
Haha, this is Anon from 11:37. I’m not saying you’re wrong, but I try to limit those days to once a quarter or once a month max (waiting for a decision from a big white whale client or something). Otherwise I’d literally be doing fluff work all day most days. I wouldn’t be surprised if I have a touch of ADD, but I don’t like to be medicated for anything and I’ve been able to set myself up to be productive more often than I’m not.
Yes, the problem is how many days a week I have like this! My office is already spotless from all the procrasti-cleaning I do in moments like this. But my real work gets pushed to after hours, and it sucks.
I think CHS below is correct, and it’s disappointing.
This, to me, is the nature of the modern workplace. We have created and come to rely on such a culture of responsiveness that having work that moves forward with our without the input of others is rare. I realize this is not helpful, just wanted to offer solidarity.
A family member who lives locally recently underwent a medical procedure and will be home recovering for the next 2-3 weeks. I have reached out and offered to bring over some home-cooked food to help make dinners easy for her, which she was greatly appreciative of. I am planning to make soup, but wanted to make a second meal to bring. She is diabetic and tries to limit her carb/pasta and sugar intake but otherwise will eat anything. Any suggestions?
Roast chicken
+1. If you make a batch wifh drumsticks she can freeze small portions individually so it serves for multiple nights.
I have one in my family…..a crustless quiche is low carb and easily transported and reheated. Roasted chicken is comforting…..with low glycemic roasted vegetables like asparagus, zucchini, broccoli, cauliflower. If she likes italian, tomatoes and peppers are low glycemic…..skip the pasta and make a chicken cacciatore with tomatoes, peppers and mushrooms.
How about a big salad with lots of sturdy greens, veggies and proteins? E.g. “Nancy’s chopped salad”, I like smitten kitchen’s recipe. I would substitute the iceberg though, for Romain or another good quality salad green.
Baked or roasted chicken thighs with interesting spices (I like Penzey’s old world seasoning for chicken), roasted vegetables, hummus. The chicken and veg are easy to heat up in the microwave. The hummus makes protein+ veg feel like a meal, at least for me.
Advice on how to respond to unfair, vague criticism? I got my written annual reviews recently and my in person review is coming up. Most of my reviews were glowing but one person made a vague reference to the fact that I ruffled feathers because I told someone working for me to do my work to the exclusion of others. I have never told anyone to do my work to the exclusion of others. Also, no one has ever told me there was a problem. I’m the most senior person my assistant works for, I do minimal work with the sole paralegal in my group, and I generally don’t delegate urgent things to associates (or if I do, I check with them first to make sure they have capacity). I can’t think of anyone who might have had reason to complain.
I plan to ask what this apparent incident was about, but I suspect I’ll get a vague answer. Last year, this same reviewer gave me a similarly vague comment (apparently I’m “too intense” – idk what that means) but refused to point to a specific example or give me more details, they said it was a general comment. I find it pretty tiresome to 1) hear about problems for the first time in my written review, and 2) not be given enough information to actually improve. Advice on how to approach this during my in person review?
“That is interesting feedback. I cannot remember anything like that ever happening, and I would love to have some more details so I can understand what is going on and how to address it.”
Yes, this. Though fwiw, I had a similar issue and addressed it exactly this way, and the response I got was basically “I don’t have the specifics, just try to avoid doing anything that might be interpreted this way in the future.” Which was MADDENING.
I would probably say something like, “Unfortunately, vague comments that aren’t tied to specific incidents aren’t really actionable, especially when they run counter to the rest of the positive feedback I’ve received. Can you please provide more context about this comment?” and then see what happens.
This is amazing. Say exactly this.
That’s pretty confrontational, I don’t know that I would say that.
Really? I find it to be matter-of-fact. Said in an even tone it would be even more so.
It doesn’t sound that confrontational to me, but it depends how it’s delivered.
I had something similar happen with a reviewer and just approached it like, “gee, I don’t have a clue what that’s about. I wish he had mentioned it at the time if there was an issue so I could have corrected it.” The business leader who was giving me the in-person review responded something like, “Yeah, that’s a one-off and if he didn’t bother to explain why he wrote what he wrote, I won’t worry about it.”
Fwiw – the reviewer will be present for the in person review, so I’ll get to ask them directly wth this comment means. I just expect from past experience that they’ll dance around it. I’m a fairly seasoned litigator so I’m all about getting answers from evasive witnesses, but maybe cross-examining my boss isn’t the best strategy.
Ask him what concrete, actionable changes he expects you to make.
I wrote the response at 12:26 but this one is better.
Is that reviewer going to be in the room? If so, I’d say “I was curious about comment X. I don’t recall saying that to anyone. Can you share more about your comment?” I would NOT give the reviewer credit by throwing yourself under the bus (eg suggesting you may have created such an impression, if you have not)
There is an HBR Women at Work podcast that deals with this topic. Highly recommend!
I’m starting to think that maybe Trump gets impeached, but nothing comes of it but super-energizing his base.
And Biden is still polling 1.5X what Warren or Sanders is polling at. So I think he is the default nominee. But this scandal makes it seem that Ukraine has been rotten with corruption for a long time (more than Trump administration), and exhibit A to this is Hunter Biden, which doesn’t make Biden senior look very good for his own personal non-cleaning house when he was VP.
So — ultimately both are kneecapped a bit, but Trump’s base is energized while Biden’s is still very meh-to-fractured, so I can’t see this ending any other way than a second Trump term. I don’t want to be right about this, but I fear that this is how the story will go.
At this point in 2015, we were not even talking about Trump is a serious candidate. I believe it is fair too soon to have a true sense of who the candidate will be or to worry about whether the party will line up behind them.
+1. I also think there are a ton of people (me included) who are feeling kind of meh on Biden now, but will get majorly energized if he becomes the nominee and will put in a lot of work to get him elected. Same can probably be said of any other Democrat running.
The political corruption is so gross and the only thing democratic front-runners can talk about is taxing the “rich” and giving the money away. I am not here for it.
On a side note, Andrew Yang is the only person (since y’all have canceled Tulsi) that a non-socialist could support.
Lol I think Tulsi canceled herself pretty well.
Huh??? Andrew Yang is like the most socialist person in the race! He wants universal basic income! (I don’t dislike him fwiw, but don’t get the idea he’s the only person a non-socialist could support…he’s to the left of everybody on economic issues).
Looking for a clothing present for a tall and lanky teenage girl. Is there a juniors brand that sells tall clothing?
H&M runs really tall.
Just a thought, in case you are particularly close with this girl: My cousin was always tall and lanky growing up and my mom (also tall, formerly lanky!) would take her on a shopping trip every time she visited. My aunt is fashion challenged, shall we say, and paid for the clothes, and my cousin loved having someone to help her find clothes. A shopping trip could be a very cool birthday present, in the right scenario.
No recommendations to actually answer your question though – sorry!
Don’t know about specifically junior’s brands, but my very tall friend (6’1″) buys talls from Gap online.
UGH… Just found out from vet that my sweet new floof (6 m/o) has Giardia. I’m happy to have an answer for his troubles but this just makes my skin crawl. I have another cat too. If any of you cat parents have dealt with this before, what did you do to clean/disinfect your homes? I feel like I just want to pour bleach over everything.
My puppy had giardia and is now cured of it. While he was being treated for it, I was vigilant about bathing him and (gross alert) wiping his bum after movements. I also used disinfectant wipes religiously on areas where he had accidents and his crate (I also took apart his crate and washed it in the shower), and washed all of his blankets/any blankets he had come into contact with on the hottest wash cycle on the washing machine. I was careful to wash my own hands and use hand sanitizer, and all is well now. The key is that other animals/humans can only get it from contact with infected feces – so anywhere or anything that could possibly have come into contact with his feces got washed religiously until I got that clear fecal test.
Same, we did all of this and our second dog didn’t get it. We were just careful to clean up and wash things he touched a ton (at the beginning of treatment and twice at the end), and made sure there was no poop in the backyard where the other dog could come into contact with it. If it makes you feel better, the vet told me she wouldn’t want to treat asymptomatic giardia (what ours was) if it weren’t zoonotic.
Not sure what med you’ll get or if this works for cats, but our vet recommended using marshmallows to disguise the liquid we had to give to them. We microwaved 2 marshmallows (huge dogs/large med doses) for ~10 seconds and mixed with a tablespoon of water, then mixed in the medication. Dogs loved their “marshmallow soup” for a week and a half.
The Caraa Studio large fits a 15″ laptop. I have the medium and I love it.
After my old Alta died I got a Versa, but it’s several months later and I actually just went back and bought a discounted Alta HR because I missed the smaller form factor and think it looks better. There are some things it can’t do but for me it’s better for every day. If you want a larger face and some of the newer features (HR, water resistance, etc.), I’d go for the new Charge (Charge 3, I think).