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Updated: Nov 1, 2018 122 Comments · by

Coffee Break: Dayna Fuchsia Jade Pendant Necklace

Coffee Break

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Kendra Scott Dayna Fuchsia Jade Pendant Necklace Pretty, pretty — I always think a long pendant necklace is an essential in your accessories wardrobe, and I love the pop of color here. I always wear them with silk or cashmere turtleneck sweaters, but they can be great with a lot of other simple-front pieces like dresses and even office-appropriate t-shirts. I haven't seen fuchsia jade before, and love it — and the whole thing is only $49 today (was $95). Nice. Kendra Scott Dayna Fuchsia Jade Pendant Necklace (L-2) P.S. Happy Rosh Hashanah!

Sales of note for 10.10.24

  • Nordstrom – Extra 25% off clearance (through 10/14); there's a lot from reader favorites like Boss, FARM Rio, Marc Fisher LTD, AGL, and more. Plus: free 2-day shipping, and cardmembers earn 6x points per dollar (3X the points on beauty).
  • Ann Taylor – Extra 50% off sale (ends 10/12)
  • Banana Republic Factory – Up to 50% off everything plus extra 25% off your $125+ purchase
  • Boden – 10% off new styles with code; free shipping over $75
  • Eloquii – Extra 50% off a lot of sale items, with code
  • J.Crew – 40% off sitewide
  • J.Crew Factory – 50% off entire site, plus extra 25% off orders $150+
  • Lo & Sons – Fall Sale, up to 35% off
  • M.M.LaFleur – Save 25% sitewide
  • Neiman Marcus – Sale on sale, up to 85% off
  • Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
  • Talbots – 50% off 2+ markdowns
  • Target – Circle week, deals on 1000s of items
  • White House Black Market – Buy one, get one – 50% off full price styles

And some of our latest threadjacks here at Corporette (reader questions and commentary) — see more here!

Some of our latest threadjacks include:

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Comments

  1. Susie

    Basic cardigan sale alert. (v-neck, 3/4 sleeve) http://shop.nordstrom.com/S/14th-union-v-neck-cardigan-special-purchase/3526975?origin=keywordsearch-personalizedsort&contextualcategoryid=0&fashionColor=RED+SAUCY&resultback=0&cm_sp=personalizedsort-_-searchresults-_-1_2_A I just got these in the blue and red and for the price they can’t be beat. I wore the red yesterday and it’s the first time I’ve ever gotten complimented specifically on a cardigan. The material is very soft and comfortable – but runs quite small so I suggest sizing up.

    • zora

      Speaking of, has anyone tried the Halogen v-neck cardigans? They have a couple of colors, and I am desperately in need of new cardis due to my strangely bony elbows. ;oP

      Also, Lands End has new colors up in their cotton cardigans, I might grab a few of those.

      • NOLA

        I ordered 2 during the NAS and returned them. The colors were great (dark purple and dark blue) and they were very lightweight, but I didn’t like how the ribbing pulled them in at the bottom. I mainly wear my cardigans with dresses and that works best with a cardigan that’s straight at the bottom.

      • Susie

        The Halogen looked kind of grandpa-ish to me, I think it’s the longer length + large patch pockets. Also I guess the one I was looking at was the lightweight which seemed too sheer, but the merino looks nice. But I did just get this Halogen crew neck cardigan http://shop.nordstrom.com/s/halogen-long-sleeve-cardigan/3461391?origin=keywordsearch-personalizedsort&contextualcategoryid=2375500&fashionColor=Green+Bug%2F+Blue+Tile+Combo&resultback=798&cm_sp=personalizedsort-_-searchresults-_-1_3_D The dots are cute and it is quite soft. The arms are a bit long for me, and they are on the narrower side but not too narrow.

        • zora

          Oooo the dots one is one of the ones I was thinking about! I will give it a try, since i have that other dress to return. Thank you!!

        • In the Pink

          Those patch pockets have to go! I mean, why draw attention to the hips? Then the cardi does not lie “flat” when belted. Not a good thing. I am finding that all of the favoured Halogen items we talk about are all suffering a lack of quality and the nice “hand” of the fabrics when they became this site’s favorites. Sad.

          • zora

            I love pockets on my sweaters, to hold my phone when i run to the coffee shop, etc. My hips are pretty obvious anyway, not having pockets there isn’t exactly hiding them. ;o)

    • AIMS

      I bought this in white a few weeks ago and really like it too. It’s almost clingy which makes it perfect to wear open because it doesn’t add any bulk. Maybe clingy is not the right word for it, but it’s made from a nice stretchy fabric and I generally like cardigans that are cut closer to the body so that they don’t look boxy or overwhelming flouncing around.

    • Calla

      I bought this in two colors (Blue Clemetis, which is a richer blue than it looks on screen, and Rose Tea, which is more coral) maybe a month ago and love it! Agree on sizing up.

  3. botox for pelvic floor muscle spasms?

    has anyone ever had botox to treat pelvic floor muscle spasms? I’m having it done next week, and am really nervous. My doctor does not use anesthesia because he needs to be able to communicate with me/feel which muscles need the injections. If you’ve had it done, was it incredibly painful? Did taking ibuprofen beforehand help?

    • Anony

      Have you considered the capsules that you insert that sort of numb that area? I did not have spasms but general pain and these capsules really helped during LGP. I forget what they are called, but you get a prescription for them. I don’t know if this is your situation but it sounds a bit less painful/invasive l than Botox.

      • botox for pelvic floor muscle spasms?

        yes – I’ve tried valium suppositories, but haven’t found them helpful. this is definitely a last resort option, believe me!

    • Leigh

      I haven’t tried them, nor have I experienced the problem, but I did just read an article in a magazine (maybe Elle?) talking about this. The author found a physical therapist that specialized in this area and she said that helped her immensely.

      • botox for pelvic floor muscle spasms?

        thanks for the suggestion – have been doing pelvic PT for 5 months now with limited improvement…truly a last resort.

  4. Paging TBK

    I found sea bands (or some knock off) awhile ago at Target. I may also have a pair at home in which case I am happy to let you have them since I don’t have to road trip for a long time. Hope you feel better soon!

  5. B

    We seem to be having lots of discussions on season-appropriateness lately (tweed, winter white, etc.). Here’s another question – are nude heels appropriate year round? Does it matter if they are patent and/or peep toe?

    • AIMS

      I think this depends on climate/region.
      I’m in NY, I can’t think of too many shoes (perhaps evening would be the exception) where peep toes would be appropriate in the colder months. Patent leather has traditionally been a Memorial Day – Labor Day material but that rules is observed by almost no one today. But I do think that a “nude” patent leather shoe reads a bit more summery than a non-PL. That said, I have seen “nude” shoes all year round (closed toe) and I think it’s fine if it works with the rest of your seasonally appropriate outfit.

    • Ooona

      It is time we ladies stop thinking about such mundane topics, and move on to meaningful issues, such as the Syria crisis and Obama’s response. Without taking sides, what do we think about a president who is more concerned with giving money to his friends in Chicago than protecting innocent children from genocide overseas? I think we, as corporate women, deserve a forum that can show we care about more than silly pendants, or whether to wear nude heels or peep toe shoes!!!! No wonder men do not take us seriously. We need to show that we can think and act like responsible women, not merely fashion ditzes.

      • NOLA

        Well, that’s not what this is. We’ve discussed the Syria situation a couple times in the past week. Go read.

      • L

        Well clearly you must be a troll. On the off chance you’re not I think the statement “a president who is more concerned with giving money to his friends in Chicago than protecting innocent children from genocide overseas” pretty much negates your call for a discussion that doesn’t “take sides.”

        Men take me seriously. Women take me seriously. But that isn’t because I post on a website dedicated to office appropriate fashion/culture and/or post about my political opinions on the internet. It’s because I can carry on well-informed discussions on a multitude of topics all while wearing the appropriate shoes.

        If you want to a political fight, might I direct you to Politico/Fox News websites, where the comments seem to be more your speed.

      • Bee

        Then start a Serious Ladies Who Only Talk About Serious Things Because They’re So Serious Blog. If you don’t want to read about shoes, then why are you reading a blog with the tagline “FASHION, lifestyle, and career advice for overachieving chicks” (emphasis added)?

      • Monday

        I think this is Ellen. Using many consecutive O’s is one of her things (Ooona).

      • Anonymous

        We could do that, but since it would almost certainly turn into a morass of misery, let’s not and say we did.

      • anon-oh-no

        in my view, responsible women (and polite women) do not engage people in a discussion about political topics in which they do not wish to engage.

        As many have noted, the women on this site come here for the express purpose of engaging in discussions about fashion, including peep toes and nude pumps. Sometimes we also talk about personal things like breakups or TTC. And othertimes we also talk about political things or work-related things. But when we do, we most certainly do not put down those who wish to skip over those discussions and continue talking about fashion.

      • Anonymous

        Am I the only one that can recognize Ellen? If someone posts about MEN taking women seriously, its ellen.

        • zora

          I saw the same thing. That’s why I clicked ‘report’ instead of feeding the troll.

          • Anonymous

            I hope people don’t shy away from using the report button, but I hope it becomes less necessary. You don’t get to say whatever you want wherever you want without consequences, and sometimes those consequences are that your peers decide they don’t want you around. If people learn how to talk intelligently and persuasively, without throwing out ridiculous rhetorical bombs, this place will be better for it.

          • Anonymous

            But we can do that by saying we don’t agree, not by silencing different view points. I have never seen an awful post on this site, and i have been reading for years. Ones that are a little harsh get called out.

    • S in Chicago

      I think n*de works all year. If you’re looking for a particularly “winter” feel, you can always look for something similar in color that’s done in a suede or snakeskin or tweed. I think texture always makes shoes feel more fall/winter like. (Or maybe I just like excuses to rotate in some new shoes….)

    • B

      Thanks all. I think I’m struggling because it’s still hot as heck here, so things like suede and tweed don’t seem appropriate yet, but since it’s after Labor Day my summer clothes don’t seem right either.

      • another anon

        This time of year, when it is after labor day, but still very warm here, I try to mix things up, seasonally. While I dont wear white shoes, slacks, or skirts, i may still wear a white linen blazer, but with dark slacks. Or I mix a more summery dress with a fall colored sweater or blazer.

      • Mpls

        Ignore the calendar and dress for the weather. If it feels like summer, wear you summer clothes, even if it is after Labor Day. If it feels like winter, wear winter clothes. Of course, in MN, you need a whole category of Spring Snow clothes – “cold enough to snow, but might melt by the end of the day and I’m sick of wearing my winter clothes” clothes.

  6. Gail the Goldfish

    Has anyone ever had their hair darken as they got older? My hair has been shedding a lot lately, a fact I attribute to stopping birth control pills about 4 months ago, but I’ve noticed the hair that’s growing in is brown (I’m blond), and I’m finding it rather annoying. I don’t think I can do anything about the color change, just wondering if anyone else has had this happen or has suggestions to stop the hair shedding (I have an annual physical coming up next month, so I’ll ask the doctor about it then, but if anyone has any thoughts until then). I sort of thought if I made it out of childhood with blond hair, it was going to more or less stay that color (unless it turned grey, of course), but apparently not.

    • mascot

      My hair has gone from light-medium brown to dark brown. My dad went from a tow headed child to light brown (college) to almost black (middle age) now silvery gray (60s), looks like my brother is seeing the same progression. So yes, it happens.
      Hair, skin and nails vitamins or biotin are options that have helped me with shedding. Mine’s shedding now too, I think it is seasonal.

    • Green

      I’ve actually had the complete opposite happen. It’s been getting lighter and lighter since my early 20s even though I see less sun every year. (and while some of it is sadly white, more is most definitely blonde on my previously dark brown head).

    • NOLA

      Mine went from light brown to dark brown in my 40s. It was too dark and harsh for my coloring. At that point, I started getting highlights. I only get them every 3 months but they lighten my hair and cover the few grays I have.

    • CKB

      Hormones can do really crazy things to your hair. My hair color hasn’t changed due to hormones, but the texture & thickness sure has during & after pregnancy, so I wouldn’t be surprised if color could be affected too.

      • Gail the Goldfish

        oh great :-/ I wonder if it would stop if I went back on birth control. I went off of BC to see if it would have any effect on my weight or libido. It hasn’t, but my hair is shedding and my acne went crazy for a couple of months.

    • Little Red

      Hair and hormones are very connected. When I went off bcp three years ago, about two and a half months later, I started noticing lots of hair falling out too. It takes a while for your hormones to become steady but once they do, the shedding should stop.

    • Pest

      Yes, blond hair gets darker and duller as we get older. I’ve been dyeing mine since I was 31. The first time I went in to get it dyed I brought a picture of myself from when I was 22 so the colorist could get the color right.

  7. Sleeping with the Enemy?

    Going anon for this…and changing the details (don’t actually work in education tech!)

    I work in product development for a company that, for arguments’ sake, sells a suite of technology products and implementation services to high schools, and another set of technology products to colleges. I run product for the college division, which is about 15% of the company’s revenue. It is a company known very well in the High School Technology industry.

    DH works in finance. He is currently unemployed and just got interviewed and more less “green lighted” for a role at a company that competes directly with my company in the High School Technology industry, that is about to go public. He would be working in the finance department, in an FP&A capacity, doing compliance and working to merge the finances of all the companies that have been recently bought. He would only be involved with product in so much as it relates to FP&A.

    We live in an area where there are many of these educational technology companies type. However, there are only about 8 companies nationally that compete with my company, and this is one.

    Is there a big conflict of interest here? And if so– who ought to disclose this and how? Again–I don’t work in the division of my company that competes with the firm DH would be working at, and he would’t be working in a role that has much to do with the core offerings of the company anyway…

    If I told my boss that my DH would be doing FP&A at Company X, she probably wouldn’t even know they compete with our company as a whole, since we are narrowly focused on a different market. Different sales team, different P&L, etc.

    • Sydney Bristow

      I wouldn’t think this is something you’d need to disclose, but I could be wrong. I think it could depend on your actual employer or field because your handbook or professional obligations may require you to disclose it.

      My boyfriend works for a government agency and he has a duty to disclose if anyone in his household (which includes me) is involved in something that could be a conflict of interests. In our case, I’m a lawyer and there is a possibility that I’d be placed on a case that deals directly with his work. He’s be required to disclose that but I’m not usually allowed to disclose the client/case I’m working for so I just avoid those cases completely. It’s easier for me to avoid the (thankfully few) cases instead of wading into the disclosure requirements.

    • BB

      I would check with your HR on the policy for this. I’m going to guess that the answer they give you will be: it’s fine, just make sure you don’t talk about anything confidential (which you shouldn’t be doing anyway). I’d more check with HR to see if they mandate that you need to report this or not.

      • Sleeping with the Enemy?

        What about on his end? That’s where I’m a little stuck. Does he say something like “Hey so before I sign on the dotted line, just FYI, my wife works for your #1 competitor. But not in any capacity you should be worried about, because she doesn’t work on the products that you compete with…”

        It’s sort of awkward to bring up, since IMHO it’s a non-issue that becomes an issue once it’s brought up…but I’d also think it’s weird if I saw through LinkedIn or something that my new hire’s wife works at my competitor and he didn’t say anything….

        • BB

          Again, I think I would just check with their HR. He’s already gotten the offer, so they can’t rescind it unless they really do have a policy of not hiring people with competing spouses (in which case he can’t work there anyway and you’re better off knowing now than them finding out later). But I would probably not ask until he has the offer in hand.

          Like I said, I doubt it’s a problem. I used to work in consulting and we had all sorts of spouses/friends at competing firms or clients. I think our policy was that you didn’t have to report it, but just don’t talk about anything confidential.

    • Samantha

      I’ve seen couples working in directly competitive roles with no problems (work or marriage related!) – JPMorgan/Goldman Sachs, Apple/Google Android, Google Search/Microsoft Bing, Intel/AMD, etc. (even specific divisio) couples are very common in my part of the world, and they’ve never had to officially disclose (common knowledge/joking matter among their colleagues) or do anything differently. The expectation is you don’t talk about work at home.

  8. OCAssociate

    Modalu Pippa Grab question – are the handles long enough to wear over the shoulder? I know there’s a shoulder version, but I like the look of the grab better.

    • TO Lawyer

      I would say it depends. I can fit mine over my shoulder but not if I’m in a chunky jacket or something (i.e. in winter). I think there’s one with longer handles though? (maybe the shark?)

    • Carrie Preston

      I found that they don’t – it’s why I am sad about that bag. I also had the lining shred within a few months of wearing it.

  9. Another B

    Does anybody have experience with a TRS or other rollover of a previous employer’s retirement thing to a new/independent one?

    Or experience in just withdrawing it?

    I’m debating rolling it over as my IRA for the year (on top of maxing out my 401k at current employer) or just taking the taxes/penalties and sending it all to my student loans, since it’s less than $5000

    It this something I should talk to a FA about?

    • Anon

      Rolling over a previous employer’s plan in a trustee to trustee rollover is easy. You should contact the institution that you want to roll the money to and ask them what the procedure is.

      I wouldn’t recommend withdrawing the money. Depending on your tax bracket you could be looking at substantial tax on the withdrawal. Assuming $5,000 withdrawal, 25% tax bracket and 10% penalty, you’re looking at tax due of $1,750 on $5,000. I’m sure your student loan rate is not high enough to justify that kind of hit.

    • Wannabe Runner

      Highly recommend a rollover. I left an employer and didn’t have a new one with a retirement account, so I rolled it over into a new IRA that I created. It didn’t count as my contribution for the year.

      Talking to a professional is always a good idea.

    • k-padi

      +1 to Anon. Your 65 year-old self will thank you for not cashing it in. Unless you already have an FA, I wouldn’t bother asking.

      Rollovers are super easy. I’ll plug Vanguard here because that’s where I’ve rolled all my past IRAs. I basically just went to Vanguard, opened an account, and they led me through the entire process. All I really needed was information from my quarterly 401k statement and information about my beneficiary. It was easier than buying clothes online and they have a phone number to call if it is too confusing.

      Some IRA companies don’t have the ability to do an electronic transfer so those take a few weeks and they mailed me a paper check to mail to Vanguard. But any large-ish IRA company should do electronic transfers within 2-3 days.

      • Another B

        Thanks k-padi and everybody else for the recommendations!

        I had this moment, of omg, cash to throw at student loans… but I think you’re right about the penalties (and the fact that the after penalties amount is the same as one month of being frugal and throwing THAT cash towards the loans and one extra month at this interest rate is only $50 extra interest, blah blah)

  10. Anonymous

    Rent the Runway PSA: I used them this past weekend, at someone’s suggestion (sorry, I don’t remember who!) and it was awesome. I am 17 weeks pregnant and have a grown enough in the chest and thickened enough in the waist that my dresses just weren’t cutting it.

    The dresses came in a day, they sent two sizes so it was perfect for something like this. The dress was stunning. You can add on jewelry or other accessories if you want (for a fee) and when you’re done, you just bag up the dress and throw it in the pre-posted envelope and send it back.

  11. Jessica Glitter

    Can I just say I am excited to see KS featured on this site? Love it.

  12. Flying Squirrel

    Shot in the dark TJ:

    Any Bay Area ‘r-ettes able to recommend someone who does furniture refinishing. Movers put a scratch in our (new to us, almost pristine) Room and Board kitchen table :( I’m looking for someone to buff the top and restain.

    • Orangerie

      No personal experience, but I’ve heard good things about Cow Hollow Woodworks on Steiner St. in SF. Looks like they have solid yelp reviews, too. Good luck!

    • Hel-lo

      You may want to check with the movers’ insurance policy. That would be unacceptable to me.

      • Flying Squirrel

        I’m with you. Unfortunately, this is what you get when your DH finds a “really good deal” on movers ;) He agreed we won’t use them again.

        I was pissed. But they knocked some off their final charges. I just need to find someone to do the actual repair work.

    • NM

      Room & Board also has a list of local contacts that can fix furniture. I’ve contacted them (the SF store) before, as our cats thought the table was a perfect place for a cat fight – in the most literal sense of the word.

    • Anonymous

      I know a really great furniture refinisher. I’ll post again when I get home.

  13. AMB

    I am so happy – passed all my language tests as of yesterday, which I have been working towards for over a year (bilingualism being a big asset in Government in the Great White North). My boss has been supporting me in getting these levels (including training money) and has been great about it. But honestly, I’m getting ready to move on, I’m no longer really challenged in this job. I am open to taking on a new role within my current group though. Any advice on how to navigate that conversation without seeming unappreciative of his investments in me?

    • Hel-lo

      Is the new role you’re seeking still under your current boss?

      If not, I’m having trouble finding a way to say, “Thanks for all the help! Can you help me find a new job now?”

      I think the way to go about that would be through others in your company.

    • R

      Start a discussion about development opportunities. “I’d really like to develop my skills in x and y, with a five year goal of becoming z. I’ve thought about perhaps taking on an extra project with group A, or cross training with coworker B. What are your thoughts? Are these feasible? On what timeline? Do you have other ideas on ways I can develop x and y?”

  14. tmi

    skip if you don’t like tmi conversations.

    Now have yeast infection Number 3 of the year, and I never had one ever before this year. I’m using over the counter treatment, obviously. But I would rather, you know, not have them in the first place. Ugh. What am I doing wrong?

    • Joanna Toews

      Due to wacky hormones (long story), I’ve also had several yeast infections this past year. Super frustrating.

      I’ve added a probiotic suplement to my morning vitamin coctail and try to eat yogurt every day as part of my breakfast. That’s helped.

      • tmi

        hmm, I have had weird hormone things, too. I didn’t think of a connection. I am a little too lactose intolerant for yogurt, unfortunately, but maybe it’s worth it to splurge on the lactose-free yogurt.

        • CKB

          You can buy probiotics in a capsule form at health food stores according to what my mom told me a few years ago.

        • Rosalita

          Acidophiles tablets. Some of them need to be refrigerated.

          Are you on antibiotics? Those always give me yeast infections, especially if I’m on the pill at the time.

    • Anonynonynony

      Have you actually talked to your doctor about it? Because sometimes the over the counter treatments need to be supplemented with oral meds (or in the alternative – you could be having non-yeast infections that have similar symptoms to YIs). Anyway – just a thought (at least for me, in the past, the OTC treatments have just made the sitch worse because it sort of almost treated it but it lingered and really…there are things you want to linger but it is NOT a yeast infection.)

      • tmi

        I have called the advice nurse the first two times, and they asked me about other symptoms, and then told me to go with the OTC. They said to call back if I had more than 3 in 6 months, or if the OTC didn’t work, but it’s been 3 in 9 months, and each time OTC has worked, it just takes a few days. So I hadn’t called back. I guess I’ve been trying to decide if I should follow up with the dr sooner, or try some other solutions myself.

      • Response to TMI

        I think it can also be more common if you have diabetes. Might not hurt to get screened to rule out if you’re prediabetic/diabetic.

        Also, have you started any new medications lately? Antibiotics can upset the balance as well.

    • Pregomama

      Ugh, I haven’t ever had them before…then I got pregnant. Just got over #3 for this year as well.

      • Pregomama

        There is also an Rx that knocks them out faster than the OTC stuff. I just can’t take it while pregnant. Check with your gyn.

    • Runner

      Have you recently started exercising? I never had one in my life until I started running again. I would run after work, drive home in my sweaty clothes and change after I got home. Not good enough for my body. After 3 rounds of Diflucan (my doc said the kind of infection I got required back ups and had me do three pills instead of the usual 1) it finally went away. To keep it away, I have to wear sweat wicking underwear (the $20 kind from the running store) when I run, take off said underwear the second I am done running, and shower the second I get home. If you are new to exercising I’d try fresh, clean underwear pre-work out, not the stuff you sat in all day. Right after working out, clean off w/ paper towel and water or something and then put on a clean pair of underwear for the ride home. Leads to lots of laundry but better than the alternative.

    • ITDS

      Try cutting back on sugar. I had one year where I seemed to get one every other month, back when the meds weren’t OTC. My Dr. finally asked for a very detailed description of what I was eating. At the time I worked for a consulting firm that had a major juice company as a client. 2 or 3 bottles of juice per day, plus a cookie or two every day as a snack, had turned me into a walking sugar cube and the little yeasts were enjoying the increased sugar in their environment. I cut out the juice and cookies, and the problem went away.

      • tmi

        well, I eat very little sugar already, because of blood sugar issues. But I’ll keep an eye on that, thanks.

    • Flying Squirrel

      You may not be completely getting rid of it with the OTC stuff. The oral Rx, Diflucan, is just one pill and works well (unless it’s really severe, in which case you may be prescribed to take a couple). FWIW, I had a yeast infection with this pregnancy and my doc prescribed it to me.

    • Veronique

      Have your LPG habits changed? I used to get them every time I saw a former long distance gardening partner and continued to get them fairly regularly when we moved to the same location. I haven’t had a single infection since we broke up several years ago. I’m not sure if it was because his chemistry didn’t work with me or the size of his gardening tool or both.

      • tmi

        huh, that is one thing that might have some correlation, except the specific times do not match up with just one partner. weird. and also, that would suck.

      • Shh

        TMI from my end now, but you do need to go pee after an LGP. Otherwise there may be some bacterial movement leading to infection and so on.

        • Rosalita

          Have others heard this?

          I almost never go right after and never got a yeast or bacterial infection unless I’m on antibiotics and birth control at the same time.

          • tmi

            I have heard that before, and I try to remember, but probably not as good about it as I should be. But, like I said, this never happened before this year. But maybe it makes sense that I’ve gotten older + hormone levels have changed + LGP activity has changed could all be adding up to create this.

    • tmi

      thanks for all the thoughts, ladies. And for just letting me complain, it is so freaking frustrating and uncomfortable! But I will try some of these, and I will go ahead and call the advice nurse again and see about setting up an appointment. I just didn’t know if it was overkill to go to the dr at this point. Thanks for the encouragement!

      • ccmo

        I have heard from a few girlfriends that you can get UTIs from pools and lakes. So if you’ve been swimming lately, that might be it.

        • Wildkitten

          It’s from swimsuits. So you may want to switch to something more breathable if that’s the cause.

    • another anon

      This happened to me about 10-12 years ago, in law school. I had never, ever had a yeast infection but suddenly got about 5 in a row. it turned out that the antibacterial soap that i had used for years (on my belly ring and then on my LGP region) had taken away the proper make up of bacteria in my system and made me succeptiable to the yeast infections. I stopped using the soap and have never had one again.

      So, consider the soap, or other products you may be using.

      • Anonymous

        The most helpful advice, maybe the only truly helpful, I’ve ever read in a women’s magazine was that your lady garden is akin to a self cleaning oven, and the less you disturb it the better.

        That means no anti bacterial soap, no douche, always p**ing after a party, etc. To the OP, try to maintain the equilibrium, and try to take probiotic supplements – good ones with max bacteria – that will cure you in no time. The OTCs may actually be hurting — not to get all natural nancy but those things sometimes do more harm than good.

        • tmi

          That’s the thing, I have been doing all the basic things that are recommended for a long time, and continue to. And these came (seemingly) out of nowhere this year. :( Don’t feel like any of my habits have changed, so I wondered if there was something else I was missing. Thanks for lots of good ideas, though, everyone, best place to come for advice about embarrassing, private things!

          • Anon

            I had a similar problem a few years ago. I kept taking OTC meds for recurring yeast infections, which would help, but then a while later it would come back. My doctor then examined me and told me it was not a yeast infection, or a bacterial infection. I was totally exasperated, and she finally suggested I switch to unscented laundry soap. It worked.

  15. Pest

    Now that’s sad. Ooona posted an inquiry about current events with a point of view that was contrary to President Obama and it was reported enough to be gone in about 10 minutes. Our resident troll Ellen is able to post over and over apparently without enough reporting for his/her comments to be sent into moderation. Well done, ladies. You are very tolerant of different points of view.

    And this comment will disappear in 10, 9, 8, 7…

    • zora

      It was not a thoughtful or respectful inquiry about current events at all. It was a random, accusation against every woman on here writing about shoes and clothes. It was unnecessarily negative and the exact kind of post I have been requesting a moderation system for. The post named as Ellen (which is probably the same poster, btw) are usually good natured and funny, not pointedly negative to other posters.

      • Cornellian

        Agreed. I’m also not sure women need a special place to discuss politics. We can discuss it with boys just fine. I like having this place to discuss more women-specific things.

    • anon

      how can you not see that the post was very clearly a troll? it didn’t even make sense!

    • cfm

      Yeah, that was pretty clearly Ellen. And I have complained about how overly liberal this site is and how different political view points are shut down plenty of times. But I still strongly, strongly disagree with the report button because of issues like this.

      • zora

        I’m sorry, I really don’t understand why people are being protective of clearly obnoxious trolls? To me they contribute nothing to the community. I would never use the report function against someone based only on their political opinion.

        • cfm

          Because there will be boderline cases. Maybe that wasn’t a troll. Can you ever know for sure? Some people post here speak english as a second language and have been called trolled before, and posters have called real posters trolls before. You might never use the report function for political opinions, but others will.

        • Anonymous

          For a while I thought you were at troll- I thought you were the Ellen poster. Not trying to be mean- but you have a very similar writing style. By your own rules I should report your comments because that’s what I thought. That’s the problem with a report button. To you, the oona poster was an obvious troll. She may or she may not be. But if she is not, her voice should be heard, just like yours and mine. If we don’t like what she is saying, we can disagree or skip her posts.

          • zora

            I specifically said I do *not* report Ellen. I reported this particular comment because it was negative and accusatory of the comments that were talking about shoes that she was replying to. And clearly I wasn’t the only one, because Kat said that it takes a certain number of report clicks for a comment to get pulled, and then she gets a chance to moderate it. So, there is a check and balance on the system, Kat has the power to restore comments, and I am sure she will if she feels like people are being unfairly targeted for simply expressing opinions.

          • Anonymous

            But if she doesn’t get to them in time- then the conversation is over and an unpopular opinion has been silenced. If something was truly offensive, you can email Kat about it. This site can already have a very “clique” mentality, never mind adding the report function in. I just can see this becoming very “one voice” which I am not interested in. I like diverse view points

    • AIMS

      I can’t help but find any ‘report’ button abhorrent.
      Honestly, there are enough words that get you stuck in moderation, the fact that now you can get ‘reported’ for having a disagreeable opinion is just sad to me. I get that this is Kat’s blog and we all want to maintain a colleagial atmosphere but I wish we could just trust each other to maintain the environment we all so appreciate without resorting to such censorship. This will make me sound like a grumpy old man, but I’ve been on this site long enough to say that I am not sure I like what it is becoming.

  16. Calibrachoa

    oooh pretty necklace is pretty”

    Well, the game night was fun (Went with suede boots, tights, black pinstripe skirt and a band t-shirt I changed into) and somehow I stumbled home in possession of a free t-shirt and 5 pounds of comics. Ooops.

  17. MB

    Need some advice about a tricky professional situation. My company is interviewing for some new positions right now (we got a couple of new contracts and so are bringing in new personnel to staff them). I am a member of a professional organization in my city, and as is customary, at a monthly luncheon I announced that we were hiring. As a result, two people from the organization ended up applying for two different jobs at my company. I was involved in interviewing both. In both cases, the candidates looked like strong contenders on paper, and made it through phone screening, but committed unforgivable screw-ups in the interviews – one woman showed up dressed in a tight, short leather miniskirt and platform heels and then proceeded to trash her current employers for over half of the interview. The other guy tried hard, but when asked technical questions about the job he would be expected to do, it became obvious he didn’t have the skills or knowledge to do the job. We end our interviews by saying “you will hear from us by X day if you are selected to move forward” and as we didn’t contact these people, I assume they know they are out of the running for the positions.

    Now, however, there is another monthly luncheon coming up in a couple of weeks and I know I will see both of these people, and probably get questioned about the interview process and where we’re at with hiring (we are still looking on one position after our first choice rejected our offer and we didn’t want to counter, and are making an offer tomorrow on the other). I know I am probably overthinking this, but I am really worried about awkwardness when these conversations happen – I know a simple “we decided to move forward with other candidates” is the best and safest answer, but if they ask, do I tell them anything else if they ask – especially if they ask for feedback about how they interviewed?

    • R

      Give the answer you mentioned first. Only if they press with a specific request for feedback on their interview style do you respond.

      1) Your résumé was very impressive. To help your interview highlight those skills, try to focus on YOU and your positive attributes. You may be in a challenging position currently, but it helps to downplay the negative and highlight your increased x,y,z when faced with a,b,c challenges.

      2) We were looking for more technical expertise than it seemed you currently have. If you’re looking for similar roles, it might help to take a course or take on a specific project so you can clearly illustrate your experience with those skills.

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