Coffee Break: Momofuku Milk Bar

Cookies_Compost_Low(1)‘Tis the cookie season — for sending across the country to family and friends, for bringing to parties, for overindulging in general. One of my favorite, favorite (favorite!) indulgences here in NYC is David Chang’s Momofuku Milk Bar, which ships across the US and to Canada.  The treats are delicious but just a bit unusual — the amazing Compost Cookie (pictured), which includes coffee grounds; the delectable Birthday Cake Truffles; the aptly named Crack Pie — amazing.  You can even buy baking mixes or cookbooks, for those of you not afraid of a blender and oven. Cookie tins start at $12.  Momofuku Milk Bar

Readers, which are your favorite online stores with national shipping for giving/receiving holiday treats?  For those of you who enjoy baking, which are your favorite cookie recipes for holiday events?



  1. Holiday Tipper :

    Reposting as this more appropriately belongs in the coffee break:

    I live in a very large apartment building in NY, and the list of employees handed around for Christmas tipping purposes totals 32 people! 6 doormen, then an assortment of porters, package escorts, handymen, the super, the building manager lady (who is a grump and acts put out if you ask for ANYTHING), etc. How much should I tip total? What’s the breakdown? I feel bad tipping the doormen more, but I understand that’s typical. I was thinking $50 each for the doormen, $40 for the super and building manager, and $25 for everyone else? Is that enough? Could I get away with less without seeming cheap – as is it adds up to about $1000. Everyone else in the building is super nice, but there are so many people to tip – it’s insane!

    Second question – I’m a 6th year biglaw associate. Is the rule of thumb still $100 per class year? My secretary enters my time everyday and that’s it (and still manages to make mistakes nearly every single day), and generally just sits around watching netflix, so I’m not feeling that generous…

    I’m not stingy, I promise! I just gave our beloved dogwalker who does an incredible job a massive Christmas bonus!

    • Building amounts sound totally fine, and I think you could do less ($10 less per person, except maybe $20 for the remainder group). And I’m a bit rusty but I think $100/class year sounds very generous, especially for someone who isn’t doing a totally crack job. I think $500 or less would be (way) more than adequate. Holiday tips aren’t a given, they’re acknowledgement of the help/job well done over the course of a year. If you have doubts about your secretary, check in with fellow associates to see where you fall in the giving spectrum. It sounds like there’s no reason to be at the top of the pack in this case, and that’s still a lot of money.

      • Holiday Tipper :

        Thanks! I may stick with $50 for the doormen (since this seems to be on the low end for NY, though most people don’t have so many other building stuff to tip) but go down to $20 for the rest of the list. I shudder to think how many staff will be on the list next year though – it’s gone up about 4 people every year! I’ve always been baffled about what a typical amount to give would be, and it doesn’t seem appropriate to ask the neighbors what they’re giving.

        • Let me put it this way–what you originally proposed is what by husband is likely to give his assistant, and he’s a NYC BigLaw partner, so you should definitely be giving less than him.

    • Diana Barry :

      I am always skeptical of the biglaw gift numbers. Is there someone else who can comment on this? I was in biglaw for 6 yrs (not NY though) and never gave anything more than $100 total.

      • Big law in a big city, several firms, 10+ years. I have never heard of the $100/year rule. Assistants are employed by the firm and their bonus is paid by the firm. My gifts to my assistants have varied over the years and are dependent on my relationship with him or her (how long we’ve been paired, how busy we are, etc.). I’ve had the same assistant for the last 18 months. I like him and he does good work (and does a lot more than enter time). Last year he had just started at the firm, I gave him a $100 Amex card and an ornament. Now that I know him better and we’ve worked together longer, I gave him $250 Amex card and a cashmere scarf.

      • anon-oh-no :

        ive hear that rule, but even in NYC it wasnt followed all the time, and certianly not when the market was worse. I usually give $150-$300, depending on how many years ive been with the secretary.

    • I’m in NYC BigLaw and gifts to assistants start at $100 from first year associates and go up $25 per class year after that (so as a sixth year, your gift would be $250). It’s pretty standardized across the firm – someone will usually send an email around letting the new associates know the deal. Some people tip more or less depending on personal circumstances/relationship with their assistant. But $600 is insane.

      Those building amounts sound right to me. That’s what I tip for my building, except the super gets $60 and the doormen get $40-50 each. But I only have a super, 4 doormen, and 3 additional people (I give them $20-25 each) so it’s not nearly as crazy a list as yours! I think given the length of the list you can decrease the amounts a bit.

      • I did that math wrong… a sixth year’s gift would be $225.

        • Holiday Tipper :

          Interesting, and awesome that an email goes around to explain the deal – I’d kill for something like that here! I gave $300 last year (which I thought she seemed a bit irritated by, as she never thanked me), but maybe I’ll stick with $300 and add a small gift.

          Would much appreciate any other biglaw associates weighing in!

          • Well, if she never thanked you, she sounds like kind of a jerk, so I definitely wouldn’t give more.

          • Whether she was irked or not, not thanking someone over a gift is rude!

          • NO way would I give her more. She hardly does anything for you as it is!

      • Anon in NYC :

        I gave my assistant $100 last year, and I gave her $100 again this year. I’m a 3rd year. That’s more than I spend on my parents, combined, for Christmas gifts. I also tip everyone in my building (22 people), $20.

    • I tried p’osting before, but it said I was posting to fast! So I am slowing down. My dad gives the building manager $2013 (last year $2012) so he can give out to everyone once and I do NOT have to think about it. Dad says doieng it onley once is the best and everyone is happy. YAY! B/c I do NOT even know who is workeing and who is not. Everyone is very happy and says hello Ellen to me in January, and asks me if I need a cab even tho I onley live about 3 block’s from the subway line! So if you live in my building or one like mine, see if you can give once to the building manager and ask him to give it to everyone under their formula. YAY!!!!

      Cat, these cookie’s look great, but not on my tuchus! FOOEY!

    • Yeah, that is high. I gave $100 for the first few years and then jumped up to $200 when I was a midlevel. I might give a bit more this year (senior), especially since my firm stopped giving secretaries bonuses and I know she reads above the law and knows how much I will get. She always thanks me profusely! I also give her $50 for her birthday.

    • I gave $100 for my first 3 years, then bumped up to $150-200 the past couple years.

      As for the building holiday tips, I have 24 people on my list so I totally feel your pain. A related question as I recently moved to NYC…. Do you hand the money to each individual person or is there a box somewhere? I don’t even know all of my handymen and porters, and definitely do not regularly see them all!

      • Holiday Tipper :

        I actually put the money in cards (with a quick note like “thanks for all your help, happy holidays, myname in Apt X”), write their names on the outside and hand them to the building manager to pass out. Passing them out individually would be impossible.

        Just curious, how much are you tipping given the 24 people?

        • I am still trying to decide! This is my first Christmas in this building (or any building with so many people). I am going to ask my neighbors who have lived here for a couple years what their typical strategy is….I can report back tomorrow (hopefully), if you’re interested!

          I was thinking somewhere in the $50 range for the building manager and 5 doormen, and then $20ish for the handymen and porters. I don’t want to seem cheap, but like you said, it adds up to a lot of money!! And at the same time, I also don’t want to seem like Ms. Moneybags and give more than necessary (because I am definitely not Ms. Moneybags).

    • I have a similar question – I just joined a new firm and my secretary does not celebrate holidays (religious reasons), do I still give a bonus? I started less than six months ago.

      • Holiday Tipper :

        I would think the secretary would still expect an end-of-year bonus, I’d just put the cash/gift card in a New Year’s card (or neutral thank you card) instead of a holiday card. I’ve heard you always tip your first year (I did even though I had been at the firm for about 3 months), but proration of the amount you’d normally give is more than okay.

  2. PhD gifts? :

    Apologies for the gift thread x1000, but any PhDs out there have good ideas for a gift for a lady who’s done with orals and now working on her dissertation (in humanities)? As a JD as my only comparator, I wasn’t sure if that kind of long, sustained project let itself to any especially nice treats (tea pot/set, comfy blankets, noise-cancelling headphones). Any suggestions would be much appreciated, and I’ll happily suggest great gifts for kids <5, pregnant ladies, NYers, or any of my limited areas of expertise in exchange.

    • Holiday Tipper :

      Spa gift certificate! This was always my favorite gift when I finished finals.

      • LifeScienceGoingToFinance :

        Absolutely! I got a fish spa (for the feet) voucher, a Thai massage voucher and a voucher for a thermal bath spa when I finished my PhD – and I absolutely loved all of these gifts!
        Or, if your friend will be looking for a job soon, something business-related? I got a very nice interview bag from my parents, and some appropriate jewellery.

        You could also gift a selfmade thesis survival pack: coffee sweets, instant ramen (yes, I know, totally cheesy, but don’t ask me ho many of those I ate when writing), chocolate, tea, a stress ball, …

        • Baconpancakes :

          Those pedicures where there’s little fish eating at your dead skin???? I am fascinated and a little weirded by this. What was it like?

          • A Nonny Moose :

            Eww.. the risk of infections is high with these. Also, ewww!

          • LifeScienceGoingToFinance :

            Well, it was very weird at the beginning since the fish really “attack” your feet when you put your feet in the bassin. They were also bigger than I thought, about the size of my pinkie. They really nibble everywhere, also between the toes, so especially in the beginning my friend and I were laughing so much because of the weird and ticklish feeling. But after 2 min, you get used to it.

            One thing that’s great is that my feet have never been so smooth before – the fish only eat the dead skin, and also on the top side of the feet where normally you don’t peel and scrub as much as on the bottom.

            I did not have major concerns about the hygiene, because there is a UV sterilizing system and filter with each bassin that cleans the water 3 times per hour (that’s what the staff explained). They also wash and disinfect your feet before you go in. They do it also to remove body lotion, which the fish don’t like.
            Somehow I tend to think the hygiene is quite well controlled here in Switzerland, I think I would have doubts in some Asian countries or in some basement “spa”.

    • As a 2nd year PhD, any sort of treat or luxury? Champagne /booze to celebrate finishing a chapter, nice chocolates, coffee shop gift certificates (I work in coffee shops quite a bit), spa gift certificates, lunch at a casual cafe near campus.

    • I finished my PhD long long ago (ok, two years) and I like the massage/spa gc idea. I also like the noise-cancelling headphones idea. Music is the only thing that got me through the writing. Maybe a subscription service for something fun/something that she likes? Writing a dissertation is a long slog and having something to look forward to each month would be nice.

    • Price point?
      Motivation is going to be her biggest challenge as she writes. A humanities PhD is really mentally hard. You want something that will get her fired up to write every single day. Motivational quote paperweight?

      If you can split it with someone (or several someones) I HIGHLY recommend an individual membership in It is incredible. I’m sure there are books out there too at a lower price point.

    • Give her a gifvt certificate to LORD AND TAYLOR’s! Yay!

    • Massage would be good (and maybe at a place where she could get 2-3 back/shoulder massages rather than one full-body massage). Gift certificate to a local coffee shop if she likes to write outside the house. Music is also good – gift certificate to spotify or itunes? If she writes/edits longhand, some nice pens (probably along with something else, I’m just thinking the pens that are $2/pen or so). If she writes at home, then coffee/tea/a comfy sweatshirt might be good.

    • PhD gifts? :

      Thanks ladies for the suggestions! I’m going to see if there’s any good spa situations near her, and for insurance have asked my brother for ideas (it’s his GF).

      • saacnmama :

        I love all your original ideas, but will add a couple more. Some people procrastinate by cleaning and say their homes were never as clean as when they were dissertating. Others of us can’t see taking time for that while writing (yes, my logical brain realizes how foolish that is when engaged in a long-term project) and might really appreciate a visit from a cleaning service (though that might be tricky with your brother’s GF–don’t want to give the impression he’s been complaining.) I kept gardening while I wrote (but couldn’t clean the house–go figure). If she enjoys that kind of thing, maybe a little window sill garden so she can putz around with it a bit without the commitment that a real garden brings. If she’s close to finishing, you could give her an aspirational gift embossed with “her name, PhD”. I kept a silver business card holder on my desk to gaze at and remind me. My main motivation came from passion for my topic. If she’s the same way, maybe you could find something that relates to it (but not a book or anything she’d have to cite!)
        Happy holidays!

    • Any kind of treat is great during the long haul of writing a dissertation, especially for someone (who might be) living on a humanities grad student stipend.

      On the practical side, a gift card for Amazon or another bookstore would come in very handy for either buying standard works in the field, good reference books (I needed very expensive dictionaries for translating work), or new books that are shaking up the field.

  3. I would love to hear others’ cookie ideas.

    Every year I make my favorite Double Ginger Spice Cookies multiple times (tons of fresh ginger as well as powdered ginger and other spices), and most years I make Lemon Nutmeg Shortbread, sometimes use cookie cutters and ice instead of sugar cookies. I also like to make a real gingerbread at some point, sometimes the TJ’s box, but I have a great from scratch recipe that is super dense and cakey and put an orange glaze on it. And in my family we always make Cinnamon Rolls on Christmas Morning.

    What are your favorite recipes?

    • I spent the weekend making cookies with my mom. Here’s what we made:

      Molasses spice cookies
      Peanut butter cookies
      Russian tea cakes
      Traditional rollout sugar cookies
      Pistachio cranberry icebox cookies
      Chocolate chip cookies

      And one that was just blah – a mash up spice and sugar cookie rollout that was so boring it wasn’t worth eating.

    • Diana Barry :

      I will post links separately. I always make sugar cookies with sprinkles, cookies in the shape of candy canes (almond flavor), chocolate toffee cookies, and peppermint with chocolate coating. I want to make chewy ginger ones but haven’t done it yet.

      • Diana Barry :

        • Diana Barry :

          BTW, these chocolate mint ones are awesome and don’t need as much chocolate on top as it says. My husband can eat the whole batch in one day!

      • Diana Barry :

        • Ha, these are my ginger cookies!! Except I call them “double” because I sub out the crystallized ginger (which i think is gross) for tons of minced fresh ginger. I get lots of compliments every year, they are so good.

          • gah, i am posting so much today, but i keep forgetting things.

            My sister also gave me the idea of making up a batch of the batter, rolling the dough into the balls & rolling in sugar. Then freezing on a cookie sheet in the freezer for a few hours, then popping them in a ziplock bag. Then for months afterward, I can just grab 5-6 cookies out of the bag, throw them in the oven, and voila, fresh cookies!! The batter holds up really well to freezing.

          • Or the batter tastes delicious as frozen cookie dough?

          • ha!! rosie, I like the way you think! ;-)

            altho, I’m not sure if the fresh ginger would taste good frozen, it’s pretty strong and so probably better baked. but it is amazing being able to come home from work and have freshly baked cookies in less than 15 minutes!

    • My family makes:
      -candy cane cookies (the twisted kind in the shape of a candy cane)
      -cutout cookies that are not a plain sugar cookie (more like a butter cookie with nutmet)
      -molasses cookies with crushed peppermint and peppermint icing
      -peanut blossoms

      and probably more I can’t think of. I started making cookies with pistachios, dried cherries, and white chocolate chip for our student party and it’s a big hit. Just a little different!

    • We always make mexican wedding cookies and biscochitos (it is like a shortbread/sugar cookie flavored with anise and sometimes brandy.) I also like to make sugar cookies with colored icing and sprinkles so the kids can decorate, chocolate chip oatmeal cookies (or some variation like crasins/oatmeal/pecan or rasins/oatmeal/walnut–basically some kind of oatmeal cookie), peanut butter cookies andsometimes fudge. Oh everyone also loves chocolate covered pretzels!

    • I have made a TON of cookies in my day. We just made Smitten Kitchen’s cashew butter balls and they were fabulous – light and fluffy and delicious. Chocolate chip is obvious and a perennial favorite. I take the time to chop whole bars of chocolate because I feel that a lack of uniformity enhances the cookie. In addition, these are very good and have the added bonus of being freezer cookies:

    • My sister-in-law usually makes sugar cookies with icing and Buckeyes. I’m still trying to narrow down my list, but I’m making a mix of things. With the exception of the cupcakes, these are new recipes I’m trying.

      – thumbprint cookies with jam (Sally’s Baking Addiction)
      – peppermint mocha truffles (My Baking Addiction)
      – gingerbread cookies made w/ Stevia (My Baking Addiction)
      – coconut cream pie (Mel’s Kitchen Cafe)
      – red velvet cupcakes w/ cream cheese frosting (Annie’s Eats)

      • Anonymous :

        I made thumbprint cookies this weekend (Brown Eyed Baker) and they were amazing.

    • I had a cat who’d been hit by a car and lost a hind leg. She adapted amazingly well; I was certain I’d have to have her put down when the vet said the leg would have to go. He assured me she would be absolutely fine, and she was.

    • Holiday baking is my favorite part of the season! We normally do sugar cookies, almond cookies, spritz/German butter press cookies, and chocolate chocolate chip cookies.

    • kjoirishlastname :

      I rarely make cookies, but rather the indulgence I cannot begin to get enough of is cheese straws.

      You southern girls will know. Cheese, butter, flour, tabasco, salt, cayenne. And a pecan if you’re doing wafers and not straws (I don’t have a cookie press, so wafers it is for me)

    • Every year, I make Sour Cream Cookies, which my friends have renamed “Crack Cookies,” because you tend to each the entire (enormous) batch by yourself. Even my very health conscious friend pigs out on them! (And with 5+ cups of flour, a cup of sugar and almost a whole stick of butter in the icing, I can’t blame her).

      This year, I bought dark chocolate and mint Nestle chips, which I’d like to do something with.

      • My mom makes Brown Bread cupcakes (we call it fruitcake, but the only fruit is raisins). There’s a bunch of lard in it…but so good.

      • marketingchic :

        Recipe or link for the sour cream cookies, please?

    • This past Saturday would have been Cookie Day this year for me and, if I were at home and mobile, I would have made:
      – Shortbread (recipe from giant Good Housekeeping cookbook)
      – Frosted sugar cookies (recipe from 1960s Betty Crocker cookbook)
      – my great-aunt’s peanut butter-chocolate bars (taste just like peanut butter cups)
      – that amazing browned sugar sea salt nutella cookie recipe someone posted here last year
      – gingerbread people

      • I mean brown butter, not sugar. Here you go:

        You’re welcome.

        • Anonymous :

          Those are the all time most amazing cookies. I made them last year and brought them to an office cookie exchange and was declared the greatest person to ever live.

          They are not even that difficult to make. I make them as chocolate chip cookies without the nutella from time to time, too and they are amazing.

    • IT Chick in MN :

      As the family baker, my Christmas baking requires a spreadsheet. :) Fortunately, I love doing it. My favorites for Christmas are root beer cookies (unusual and delicious) and my great-grandmother’s scottish shortbread. I’m also in charge of making the cornflake wreath cookies, which are a HUGE favorite in my family.

    • I always make at a minimum:

      Whipped shortbread
      Sugar cookies that I decorate with the kids
      Cinnamon rolls Christmas morning

      If I had more time I’d do more candy making – I love homemade hand dipped fondant chocolates. I also have a couple of other cookie recipes that are good at Christmas – cocoa mint cookies I use my cookie press with, and soft ginger cookies.

  4. Diana Barry :

  5. Hey – thanks to everyone who responded to my side dish question. I got really busy and never had a chance to respond but I did read the suggestions! I’ve never made broccolini but might give that a try if I could find something interesting to do with it. Right now I’m thinking green beans. I have a recipe for a green bean salad with dried cherries and toasted nuts and a sherry vinaigrette. That might be good since I could cook the green beans in advance?

    • AH! Caught in moderation for the name of a dressing:

      Hey – thanks to everyone who responded to my side dish question. I got really busy and never had a chance to respond but I did read the suggestions! I’ve never made broccolini but might give that a try if I could find something interesting to do with it. Right now I’m thinking green beans. I have a recipe for a green bean salad with dried cherries and toasted nuts and a sherry vinaigr e t t e. That might be good since I could cook the green beans in advance?

      • Why on earth would v i n a g r e t t e get you stuck in moderation? Is it a euphamism for something I am not aware of?

        • the combination of the letters r. e. t. t. e. are auto-moderated because of the name of thissite. I don’t Think it’s a euphamism for anything, but maybe i’m wrong! ;o)

          • Wildkitten :

            Let’s not make it one. Some of the LGP talk on thissite has been in need of a trigger-warning lately.

  6. So let’s play the good news/bad news game!

    Bad news: my little baby kitty (13 years old, but she is still my baby) was just diagnosed with vaccine-induced sarcoma and the only treatment is amputation of the affected body part. So we are amputating her right hind leg later this week. I am so worried for her, but I am glad we caught this in time because the life expectancy for no treatment is less than six months. Anyone here with tripod kitties? How did they adapt?

    Good news: I am being promoted to head of my department on 1/1/14!

    • Sorry to hear about your kitty, but glad it was caught early. Hope all goes well with the surgery. How did you find out she had this problem? I have 3 kitties of my own. I think they’re on the younger side 1-5 years (they were all strays) so I’m wondering if there is anything I should look out for as they get older.

      Congrats on your promotion!

      My bad news – it’s Monday. Good news – Wednesday is my last day of work for the rest of the year. Very thankful for my company’s generous vacation policy!

      • I was just petting her and I felt a lump on her thigh. It didn’t feel like a fatty tumor to me, so I took her to the vet the next day. I had never even heard of this type of tumor (which is weird because my father is a veterinarian), but at least there’s a proven treatment for it. It’s generally found in areas where routine vaccinations are given, so you’d try to find lumps on the back between the shoulder blades, near the thigh muscles.

        You can read more about it here:

        • Thanks so much for the info! Always a good idea to get suspicious lumps and bumps checked out.

          • I had a kitty who got one of these tumors in that spot between her shoulder blades. It was obvious enough that we got it checked right away, and they were able to remove a pretty small area to get the tumor out and she recovered pretty quickly. The other hardship that went with it, though, is that because of that she wasn’t able to have any vaccinations ever again, so we had to keep her indoors and prevent any interaction at all with other kitties. She had been an outdoor cat (previous owner) so she was mad at us for a while. But she is still doing just fine almost 8 years later with another rooommate who kept her.

    • My best friend growing up had a tripod kitty following the cat disappearing for several days and then re-appearing with a badly broken leg. It really never seemed to bother her (she was as ornery as ever at least). I think cats are very adaptable.

      Congrats on the promotion!

      • I also had a kitty come home from a rough night minus one leg. She quickly adapted to being a tripod and was back to her normal self within a couple weeks.

    • I started the cookie thread as an attempt to create some good news for myself, or just a sugar rush to mimic endorphins I guess.

      The bad news is also kitty news, it looks like one of the adorable little 7wk old foster kittens i brought home last week might have Feline Leukemia. Either way, she hasn’t been keeping food down since Saturday night and I have an appt at the vet in a little bit, but the foster coordinator suspects she’ll have to be put down. I basically stayed up with her all night, too, so i’m exhausted.

      • Oh that is just heart-wrenching. Big hugs, and good luck at the vet’s office. This is the worst part about having and loving animals, but the rewards make it worth it.

        • thanks. ;o\ yeah, I’m trying to be glad she has spent her last few days with me in a cozy house instead of in the county shelter. But, I’m still sad. siiigh.

          • well I just exhaled for the first time in 24 hours…. the vet said baby kitty is responding to fluids, so they want to keep her overnight .. she still might not make it, but they are giving her better chances now. sending her lots of healing thoughts and I’ll find out more tomorrow. poor little thing!

      • Also, my other good news is NOLA. She has been so encouraging and supportive and letting me dump my bad week on her. She is such a great friend. Hugs!

    • Sorry your kitty will need to face surgery, but so relieved you caught it in time.

      (But congrats on your promotion!)

    • kjoirishlastname :

      congrats on the promotion, sorry about the kitty.

      good news: is there any?
      bad news: it’s monday and I have a TON of work to wrap up before Friday.

    • S in Chicago :

      Not sure of kitties, but one of the most active dogs at my local dog park is a tripod. He plays fetch just as hard and fast as the rest of them. In fact, a lot of times I do a double take because you don’t even notice right away that something is different.

      • Over the summer I begged my husband for a new dog and kept sending him pictures of dogs at various shelters that fit our (his) uber-specific requirements. One day I saw a picture of a puppy that would be perfect so I sent it to him and couldn’t wait for his reply! The reply: “What made you think a 3-legged mastiff is a good idea?” Oops. I totally hadn’t noticed in the pictures.

    • Seattle Freeze :

      Not a good weekend for pets, I’m afraid – so sorry about your kitty, but glad you caught it in time!

      Bad news here is that our younger dog ate some yarn last week and ended up needing emergency surgery for a bowel obstruction this weekend. Good news is that she came through the surgery with flying colors and is home and recovering well – sleeping next to me on the couch under her quilt with her head on a pilow like a big Dober-diva.

      • Anonymous :

        My dog did a similar thing a few weeks ago and also had to have emergency surgery. I was so worried, but he is 100% back to normal now. Glad to hear your pup is doing well too!

    • Windchime :

      My old vet actually used to have a kitty named “Tripod”. She had been hit by a car and someone found her and brought her to the clinic, where they saved her (although she lost her leg). She seemed perfectly happy and healthy.

      One thing to remember is that pets live in the moment. From what I’m told, she won’t grieve the loss of her leg; she will simply accept it as how life is now and once she is done with the healing, she should be fine. Make sure your vet is good about giving her something to control her pain while she is healing; that will make a huge difference.

    • Very late to post here, but our sweet mutt from the pound had her hind leg amputated earlier this year. Her diagnosis was osteosarcoma (bone cancer). She did great as a tripod — it is simply amazing how fast they adapt.

      Unfortunately, the osteosarcoma spread despite the amputation and we had to put her down a couple of months later. It was heart wrenching, but I wouldn’t change a thing because the amputation bought her a few months of pain free living.

      A great resource is tripawds dot com (should turn up on google). Mostly geared toward dogs but some kitty owners there too. Best of luck and thinking of your kitty. She will amaze you!

  7. I’m sure they’re delicious, but compost cookie just does not seem that appetizing.

    • My reaction, too.

    • They are actually pretty tasty and better than they sound. I don’t like coffee at.all. but I even eat these cookies (the grounds aren’t really noticeable).

    • Don't judge a book... :

      I hear ya, but I think that’s supposed to be part of the charm. I overcame my initial nose-turn-uppage and tried them when in NYC… and liked them so much that I begged a friend to send me some and she sent me the official mix from Williams Sonoma so I could make them myself. SO good.

  8. Modified Tollhouse Recipe:
    Preheat Oven to 375 for 10 min

    2 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
    1 teaspoon baking soda
    1 teaspoon salt
    1 c. butter
    3/4 c. olive oil
    1.5 cups packed brown sugar
    2 teaspoon vanilla extract
    2 large eggs
    1 of your favorite chocolate bar, broken into smallish pieces

    Mix in a bowl (I have no patience for putting in ingredients separately… nor do I want to clean 2 bowls)

    Bake for 8-12 min (I check in on 8 & then check in every 2 more, cookies should be firm but not overcooked because they continue to cook after being taken out of the oven).

    • Sounds lovely but this makes me think of that Friends episode when Monica is trying to recreate Phoebe’s grandmother’s “Toulouse” cookies.

      • Sooo funny… I mean, it is the best! If you read about Famous Amos & his cookies… he started with it as well (back before they were bought & become the weird too hard cookie bags we know & love today).

  9. I want a cookie so terribly right now. For those of you not yet addicted, I have to heartily second Kat’s recommendation. Anything Momofuku makes is delicious. I tried my hand at crack pie myself last year and it is not that hard but is amazing.

    • Anon in NYC :

      Agreed. Also, NY-ers, if you like apple pie plus crumb topping, you absolutely must try the apple-sour-cream-walnut pie from Little Pie Company (43rd & 9th Ave.). I think they ship (not sure where), but it’s out of this world. I think it has surpassed my mother’s apple pie (but of course I don’t tell her that).

  10. Relationship advice requested.

    I’m coming up on the two-year mark of dating my fella. And it’s been pretty uniformly great. We don’t fight, we have great and frequent garden parties, etc. A few weeks ago, we had a sort of inconclusive conversation on where we are going, are we heading toward setting up house together, etc. That was at my instigation.

    Anyway, in the time since then he’s started being more critical. I’ve put on a fair amount of weight in the past year, in part due to illness and injury preventing working out and contributing to my I-Feel-Sorry-For-Myself comfort eating patterns. He hadn’t said one word about it until last week, when he gently told me it is bothering him, unsexy, etc. Well, I tend to agree that it’s an issue, and I’m trying, but it’s hard since I still can’t exercise in the way I used to. But I’ve started adjusting my eating. Again, it’s hard, it’s Christmas.

    And then yesterday, I was having a very low-energy day. I took three naps, that is how low I was feeling. And he decided to be all critical about that. He invoked my brother’s wife, who I cannot stand, who doesn’t work in or out of the house and is totally slothful. I was incensed. Hi, I have a job, I clean his apartment AND mine, and if I am having a low-energy day, I do not need to be chided about it. But he went on over the course of the day. What’s wrong with you, are you sick? You need a hobby. Don’t you have any lifelong dreams or ambitions you could be working toward right now? etc.

    I do have passions and hobbies, they are just more seasonal. I spent every Saturday over the summer without him, working on a big group art project. I traveled 5 weeks of the year without him because he’s not much of a traveler. I cook, I read, I work out (well, usually).

    I really didn’t have the energy to deal with him, so I went to bed. I know we have an uncomfortable conversation coming up.

    I suspect this turn is related to our earlier where-do-we-go-from-here conversation. He’s probably thinking to himself, if I step out and commit to this woman, what will our future be like, can I accept these flaws of hers not just on a day-to-day basis, but for life?

    I know it’s better if we figure it out now if we have dealbreakers. I’m feeling pretty fragile around all this criticism and I do not feel like seeing him for a couple days. But when we do talk, I am going to have to say: I will most likely always struggle with my weight. I will most likely always struggle with depression, and I will always need a certain amount of unstructured down time. I feel like I have been told, “Your body needs to change to suit me, and actually your whole demeanor needs to change to suit me.” It’s kind of out of left field given how great everything has been up until this point.

    • I’m sorry you’re still feeling under the weather. I’m sorry your SO is behaving like a jerk right now, after 2 years of being really great. It may be because he’s spooked, it may be because he’s trying to do “due diligence”, it may be because he’s trying to undermine the relationship and make you dump him so he doesn’t have to commit, it may be he’s been abducted by aliens and replaced by a look-alike who’s a bit short on compassion….

      My long-winded way of saying, there’s no point in guessing and storytelling as to why he’s suddenly decided to act this way. Good on you for preparing what you’d like to say. But you are well within your rights to call him on his nonsense.

      Seriously? You clean your place and HIS???? When you’re ill and recovering from injury and he’s whining about how he thinks your lazy? The sheer ingratitude and @ssholic nature of that comment would have me verbally kicking said SO’s rear like a soccer ball up and down the stairs.

    • I’m sorry. You should absolutely say that and you shouldn’t make any excuses for him. Yes, he probably is thinking of everything in “can I deal with three naps a day for the rest of my life, etc.” But the person you’re in a relationship with should never make you feel badly about yourself, esp. when you’re already not feeling so great.

      FWIW, in the other dating post about the poster’s BF being weird about her making a lot of money, I thought the guy deserved the benefit of the doubt. But what you write about your bf saying, “What’s wrong with you, are you sick? You need a hobby. Don’t you have any lifelong dreams or ambitions you could be working toward right now?” is a big A-Hole Red Flag for me. You clean HIS apartment and YOURS? What? Like, regularly? And he has the nerve to complain about your low energy day? And what about using words like *unsexy*? It’s fine to express certain things to your partner and its naïve to think that we should just be equally attractive to our mates no matter what, but words like “unsexy” should never, ever be used. Not cool. At all.

      I’m not going to say DTMFA, but say what you have to say to him bluntly and honestly and if he doesn’t shape up big time, ASAP, then DTMFA!

    • Have you sought help for your depression? It sounds like you two have a good relationship and he’s frustrated watching you struggle and is feeling helpless. Sure, it could have come out nicer, but if you’re not actively investing in yourself then it’s not fair to expect someone else to.

      • Yeah, I take antidepressants and have done for 15 years. The dark part of winter is just always always hard. Plus, Christmas is stressful (and as a Jew, he probably doesn’t fully grasp HOW stressful) AND we just had a huge round of layoffs at work this week where we lost about 20% of my 50-person group. THAT was incredibly stressful as well, and I am sure contributed to my more-couchbound-than-usual Sunday.

        • Then he’s a bit an insensitive jerk. If you think it’s worth trying, talk to him in no uncertain terms lay it out there. That’ll tell you pretty much everything you need to know.

    • I feel like this was the story of the 3rd year of my current relationship. We were trying to figure out if this was “it” and it’s like that highlighted the worst qualities in both of us. We bickered about appropriate clothing to wear to the grocery store, picking up bath towels off the floor, and preferred dietery choices of the month. It wore off with time, but for awhile it seemed like everything was a deal breaker. Communicate lots, try to get to the root of issues and all the best on making it through to the other side.

      • Hearing that someone else went through this and came out okay is heartening. Thank you.

    • kjoirishlastname :

      I would stop right where you are and get checked for thyroid. You sound exactly like me pre-thyroid meds. I was just dragging. all the time. I went on a low dose of synthroid, and felt a change almost immediately–like within a week. The numbers still weren’t great, so we bumped up my dosage, and it continued to improve. In the end, I’ve had 1 more adjustment, and my numbers have been much more steady. I get labs drawn every 6 months, and an ultrasound 1x a year.

      I would encourage you to ask him to bear with you while you try to sort some of this out. It could be legit medical (and depression–often goes along with the hypothyroid), and could have a fairly easy fix.
      BUT, you should also let him know that his words were pretty hurtful, and that it’s not like you’re being a lady of leisure and napping away. If you feel like crap, sometimes the only thing to do is sleep it off. Usually works wonders for me, but sometimes there’s a much longer recovery.

    • Anne Shirley :

      So, I want to slap him for you, but you love this guy right? Trust him, want to spend a life with him? When you say “I will always struggle with depression,” what do you mean by that? Because I think there does need to be room for him to say he’s not okay with 3 naps a day. Its hard to tell someone you love “I’m worried that you are not taking good care of yourself.”. He picked terrible words to do that with, but can you respond to the message and the words separately? Can you talk to him about what you are struggling with (weight, fatigue, depression) and also talk to him
      about compassion and flexibility?

      • I do love him. He’s been really phenomenally great up til this point, best boyfriend ever.

        In general, he treats me really well, thanks me for the things I do for him (cooking dinner, cleaning up, what have you), brags about me and my accomplishments to his parents and everyone who will listen, always picks up the check (he does make about 2.5x what I do so I’m OK with that), and did I mention the gardening? We have a really great connection there.

        He’s also generous with his friends – if anyone needs a hand moving, he’s your guy; is kind to animals and my cats adore him; is incredibly intelligent and funny and nerdy and creative and just awesome in general.

        Which is why these comments have me so spun.

        • I think this may be a “bash boyfriends day” based on an earlier thread. The guy sounds great. He may not fully understand the chemical nature of depression and how it’s not just feeling a little blue. I don’t think you should let the HIVE break up your relationship.

          • If you’ve been happy with him thus far and he’s been great other than this recent spell, just talk to him. Tell him exactly what you said here. I’d wager that the main difference between relationships that make it and ones that don’t mainly comes down to communication and listening. If you can explain how you feel calmly and he can take it to heart and respond in kind, you’re probably going to be in pretty good shape for the future.

            (And, yes, I was pretty negative in my comment on this above, but your original post painted a slightly different picture for me than your follow up).

          • It’s not bash boyfriends day. It’s “boyfriends are getting called out on their sh*t” day.

        • If you can objectively say that he’s got more in the pro column than the con column, give him the benefit of the doubt. If this was the first talk you’ve really had about a “future” he could be having an “oh carp” moment and just needs to find his balance again. It could be that the holidays are stressing him out too and in addition to the relationship stuff, it’s coming out on you.

          It is something that needs to be addressed though. Maybe a conversation about how since the previous talk you’ve noticed him being a lot more critical/in assessment mode. If it’s bugging you TALK TO HIM about it. If you don’t feel you can talk to him, that is the red flag in my mind.

        • I will be the first to admit I’m totally jaded in this area and my comment comes from bad experience so take it as you will but:

          I also thought my ex was an amazing guy and would be a great life partner. And things started to get more serious and then he started to freak out (I think) and started to say that certain things about me wasn’t what he wanted in his long-term partner. I think when things progress to a certain point, you start wondering if you can live with someone’s quirks for the rest of your life.

          I would hope he is just worried but it sounds like a bit of a red flag to me. I would proceed carefully and cautiously from this point on.

    • Baconpancakes :

      If this is suddenly coming up after two years of supportive, loving kindness and a recent “planning our future” conversation, I also have to say this is probably just the guy being freaked out and worried about you.

      My SO suffers from serious depression, and while I love him fiercely, I have sometimes wondered “Will I be able to deal with ______ for the rest of my life?” Fortunately, he’s been making a lot of positive changes in his life, being much healthier, socializing purposefully, using his time proactively instead of doing the things that make him more depressed.

      Part of what helps is me knowing his needs, which sound similar to yours – every week or so, he needs a full day of alone time to do nothing productive, sleep, play video games, putter in his apartment alone, etc. He also struggles with his weight, and he appreciates the occasional encouragement to work out and eat healthier (while still showing him I’m attracted to him), and I also struggle with my weight, but would hate if he mentioned it. We’ve both communicated on that, and me mentioning it to him, and him not mentioning it to me is what works for us.

      I think you need to just talk it out, and then hug it out and watch a movie together (or something similarly intimate but not requiring talking). If he’s really awesome, he’ll appreciate the Parfait User Guide, and your relationship will be stronger. If he refuses to take suggestions on how to approach you and help you be happier and healthier, then yeah, JSFAMO.

    • prof on a bike :

      I agree with the rest of the commenters up thread that you need to figure out whether this is coming from a place of concern for you or commitment-phobic freakout. If he’s 100% in your corner but communicating his concerns badly, that you can work on. If he’s demanding that you do these things in order to become worthy of his commitment, that’s a big concern.

  11. MMM help? :

    Mr. Money Mustache Advice – I just checked out the blog today, and was shocked to realize the 20% take-home I’m putting in savings (not including a 7% before-taxes 401k contribution) is apparently small beans. In a high COL area, I’m doing most of what he suggests already, eating in, lowering electricity use, avoiding cable, bike/walk/bus everywhere, but I am paying 42% of my take-home in rent, which is what allows me to do all the other frugal, distance-related things. I do have a roommate, our apartment is pretty small, we’re in a “diversifying” neighborhood (ie not safe to get packages delivered, but safe to park your car/not get mugged), and I’m on the lower end of rent for my area, so I think it’s pretty much not going to get cheaper until I find a significant other I want to share a 1-bdrm with.

    It seems like my only options to substantially increase savings here are 1) Make more money, 2) Get a new job in a town with a cheaper COL and move, or 3) Move to an unsafe neighborhood with 6+ roommates. Is MMM really just for people who make more money than I do?

    • I don’t follow MMM, but from the sounds of it, it’s for people who live in a lower COL area than you do. 20% not including pre-tax retirement contributions sounds to me like you’re doing well- don’t beat yourself up that you can’t save ALL THE MONEY. Life costs money.

    • I think it depends on your objectives. Do you want to retire early? If so, you probably have to figure out where you can make drastic cuts. Are you saving enough to be able to retire and live comfortably? If you’re not sure you’re going to make it on your current income, then you may need to look into passive income strategies. One thing to consider is whether or not MMM is married and if he has kids. These things make a significant difference in personal finance strategy and priories.

    • He does live in small-town Colorado, where housing costs are considerably lower.

      I’ve found him eye-opening on certain topics, and have started putting away a lot more money since reading him, but you obviously have to adjust your idea of what’s achievable based on your own circumstances and goals.

    • I read MMM, but sometimes, I admit, I hate-read MMM. He’s very smug, and he’s in a very rarified position. He’s also very extreme and not everyone can live that way. Or, you could live like him and be pretty fricking miserable. I read him for the general philosophical idea that one can make do with less, but not in everything!

      He has mad building/contractor skills, and has refurbished houses. There are also certain decisions that he makes that have a high risk quotient– like bicycling everywhere. It’s great for him to go on his anti-car rants, but seriously, when you read about how Americans are terrible when it comes to seeing cyclists, and it’s all but legal to kill one with your car, you may want to think very carefully about whether you want to do what he does (bicycle everywhere.)

      Someone on here said, in general, of the three: time, money, sanity — you can get 2 out of 3. If I had to bicycle to the grocery store just to buy peanuts to grind my own peanut butter, I’d be left with only 1 out of 3. I’d burn up precious time I could have been using better (to do stuff the DH and I like), and I’d go insane, just to save, what? A few bucks? NFW.

    • MMM help? :

      Oh thank goodness. I thought I was just being ridiculously entitled. There are a lot of great lessons on his blog, but he’s pooh-poohed anyone who doesn’t follow everything he espouses, which made me feel hopeless/enraged.

      • I’m not familiar, but he sounds like a mean mr. cranky pants.
        Although maybe with a name like that it’s meant to be taken more in jest? It sounds to me like you’re doing a pretty good job of looking out for your future. It’s hard to do more if you live in a HCOL area. I spend far too much of my money on rent in NYC but what am I supposed to do? Leave my job and everything I know and move to Montana? I think you have to take this kind of advice with a grain of salt. You wouldn’t read a dieting magazine and eat exclusively low fat cereal and raw almonds, right? I think factoring in for real life is helpful here, too.

      • One issue I’ve had with MMM and it’s not unique to him is that just because he’s hit upon something that’s worked *really* well for him, he starts talking like he’s a prophet, where everything he prophecies is right and true and everybody else is a miserable sinner.

        A lot of gurus have this problem — some of them genuinely believe that what they’re proposing is the One True Path. Others are cynical and know that in the guru-game, you have to be confident and turn it almost into a Puritan-style religion, with the accompanying dogma and smug certainty.

        Every now and then, when I think I’m falling back into the spend-work-spend-work treadmill, I read MMM to get the bracing effect of icy cold water poured over my head. It’s more like a corrective. My DH says, “he sounds as fun as an enema.”

      • I actually emailed him and got a super thoughtful, nuanced post and he didn’t just respond, “you pay how much in rent????” which is what I was expecting. He said his advice is for a specific audience in a specific income range, and his advice for someone in my situation (high earners, high income city) would be different.

        • That’s really great that he had a thoughtful reply. It’s reassuring that he doesn’t really think that one size fits all, even if a lot of his posts have a different tone.

    • I read it for the entertainment, but I don’t think I do anything he recommends. In fact, I just bought a new car. Oh well.

      • +1

        I’ve been wondering if people think about trolling his site by posting stuff like:

        “Hey, MMM, I have $1293458769 in student loans, but I just bought myself a Maserati; the kids are in designer clothing, the spouse bought a boat, and my oldest kid hired someone to ride his bicycle for him to the grocery store to buy the organic peanuts to grind…but what I’m really worried about is that my interior decorator isn’t doing enough to make my McMansion look like Versailles. Do I threaten to pay the decorator less? And if so, by how much, MMM???”

    • Former Partner, Now In-House :

      Dear MMM Help,

      I recently had to replace my car. After considering all the options, my usage, how long I usually keep cars (over 10 years), and asking my financial advisor what I could afford (as opposed to what I could buy — I *could* buy anything, but I don’t want to be eating cat food when I am old), I settled on a car that cost $40,000. Based on my advisor’s advice, I paid half cash and took out a 0.89% (less than one percent — so basically free) 3 year loan for half.

      When I complained to my advisor that I spent $40,000, he said, “You have to have a car (where I live, this is true). When you make a purchase that has to be made, the real issue is whether you bought well. And you bought well in your choice of car and in your choice of payment method.” I think this is my advisor’s version of January’s comment above that “life costs money.”

      As long as you are being thoughtful about your needs and acting to meet them now and in the future, I think you shouldn’t beat yourself up about it. Speaketh the person who beats herself up about everything :)

  12. thank the hive :

    I just want to thank the hive for being so helpful and supportive. I’ve lurked for some time, and finally came out into the mix, and have found some great advice from you all. At a time when I was feeling very disconnected (especially from women), and a bit down with my job, reading both Kat’s posts and the threads on here about being strong and put-together has helped me to kind of re-acquaint myself with my profession.

    I’m not in any way a c o r p. But I am an e t t e. I work in a pretty small town in a largely rural area, though we’re the home to a big university (that’s about the only saving grace, because it attracts like-minded intellect), and probably make what a lot of your summer interns make. I don’t own a pair of nude-for-me hose, and wear a skirt maybe once a week. It’s jeans otherwise (because I can!!)

    In any event, I just want to say thanks. I’ve gained a lot from you all. Like a love for fleece-lined tights, and enough knowledge about clothing to know if it fits or not. And the nerve to really stick up for myself in asking my boss for a raise (pending, bureaucratic red tape). As well as a healthy dose of reality knowing that while I have a very limited budget, I can make good fashion choices and lust after the more spendy features.

    With that…have a lovely evening
    Mrs. O’Irishlastname

    • Baconpancakes :

      Seconded, except I probably wear skirts/dresses 4x week thanks to thissite, and spend way too much money on cute work sheaths (that I plan on wearing for years and years) that Kat features.

      My favorite bits of knowledge: matching colored tights to your shoes to make them more sleek but still fun, JSF and buy commuting shoes, and focus on where you’re going in your career, not where you are.

      This is a great community, and I really appreciate all the wisdom I’ve received, and the willingness to lend an ear, a virtual hug, and sometimes even real life help. Thank you, ladies.

    • What a lovely post. I hope you post more and lurk less. :-)

      I thank this site for many, many good things. Including a recipe for chocolate cake in a mug (that I can make using the work microwave.)

    • This is so nice to hear! I second the sentiment. I love this community. The relationship advice has been so helpful to me over the years. My favorite tidbits from the threads: On Depression- “You have two choices, depression or effort.” That has saved me so many times. On useful tricks: Using a flat iron to iron clothing collars and hems. Brilliant!

    • This really is a great group of ladies. I read a post the other day which I thought was obviously a troll and ignored it (barely resisting the urge to say go away troll), but everyone here posted positive encouragement and helpful advice because, just in case this is a real person needing support they would rather give needless advice and be thought a fool by the troll than ignore a call for help.

    • I also want to join in commenting on how much I like this site and community! I hardly ever post or comment, but sooo enjoy reading and find so much useful information here.

  13. anon in BigLaw :

    First time sending out “professional” holiday cards to clients/prospective clients (and borderline late, I know). I was about to hand address the first envelope when I realized I’m not sure of how–do I use my office or home address?

    • Orangerie :

      Your office address, for sure.

    • A.Carlyle :

      Office! And if you’re borderline late then I’m in real trouble. I have no plans to send mine until early next week. (To be fair, they’re new year’s cards but still. Thought that counts?)

      • anon in BigLaw :

        Thank you! I was, as usual, second-guessing myself unnecessarily. And you are totally on time for New Year’s cards!

  14. Carrie Preston :

    I’m heading to London for the holidays & I haven’t been there this time of year before. The weather report says lots of rain, and I think it snows sometimes. I have to admit to stressing about footwear after reading some of the threads this morning. Would it be worth lugging (or wearing) Hunter rainboots with me? Will I slip and slide in snow or is this what everyone wears?

    • Wildkitten :

      Everyone in London wears Hunters all the time. But, personally, I don’t find them comfortable to walk in, so if I was planning to visit somewhere and walk a lot I wouldn’t want to be wearing my Hunters. I can barely stand to commute in them. They do have new packable Hunters if buying new boots isn’t an issue.

      • Carrie Preston :

        Thanks much – I think you just enabled my purchase of a pair of the packable version :-) I had completely forgotten about those.

    • If it helps, I lived in London for several years and didn’t even own boots (dressy or casual)….it really just depends on how long you plan to be outside (it’s cold out–you’ll be inside more than outside) and how fancy you need to look. I found that for short walks to the Tube or waiting for a club (I was young–we did things like that!), normal shoes were fine, even when raining. The London rain can be RAIN, but more often constant drizzle. If you like Hunters, and like walking in Hunters, I’d bring them. But you do a lot of walking in London as a tourist, so most important is to bring something comfy. (Also, good hat and gloves–very key!). Have a great trip!

    • It’s most likely not going to snow for Xmas this year. I’d say most people wear regular knee-high leather boots (you can put waterproof spray on them). It will be weird wearing Hunters when it’s not raining heavily. I wear mine maybe once in two weeks.

  15. I stay stuck in moderation and that was not always the case. Anyway, should this make it out:

    Today is my 5-year anniversary at this job. It was not acknowledged at all. Not by the company, nor by my supervisor.

    Am I wrong to feel less than appreciated? (Especially given that nearly 10 people, most of which had been with the company less time than I have, all left the company over the past 18-months.)

    grumble grumble grumble

    • For what its worth, no one at my (large) company celebrates work anniversaries. On the other hand, my hubs works at a small company (10 employees) and his boss/the owner always brings in a cake for each employees work anniversary.

    • At my old job, one of the attorneys threw himself a 5-year anniversary party. He invited everyone at work and bought the first round of drinks. I thought it was a really nice way to get everybody else excited about his work anniversary.

    • Anonymous :

      Yes… why on earth would you expect someone to remember that? Some people don’t remember their own actual marriage anniversary

    • Not wrong to feel underappreciated. Although I say, depending on your industry, beware of the firms that put on great shows of faux-appreciation but drastically underpay. (I’m talking finance companies where let’s be honest, the primary motivation is making money. If people wanted warm fuzzies, they’d go into social work or various non-profit work or care work.)

      So for certain financial firms, which I’ll name if I know you well and trust you, the game is faux-camaraderie, terrible hours, and crap pay. I’m thinking they got an HR consultant that convinced the CEO that he could brainwash the employees into accepting fake compliments in lieu of real pay.

  16. Last minute gift help? :

    Does anyone remember the name of a website / box gift service for men? I feel like I remember seeing it mentioned here with rave reviews, but a thissite search proved unfruitful! If I remember correctly it was a gift service that prepared organized thematic gift boxes for men. Any help would be much appreciated – TIA!

  17. Trudy Beekman :

    It’s probably too late for anyone to see this, but if anyone is still looking, my favorite online place for cookies/treats is Cheryl’s Cookies – their frosted buttercream cookies are amazing and they do really cute baskets/displays.

  18. Our office has a cookie contest party every year where each person has to bring in something they’ve baked (it’s a small office). One of my co-workers won last year with the Momofuku Compost Cookies and deservedly so. So good!

  19. Elizabeth :

    I’d second the commenter who identified Cheryl’s cookies. I also like Rossi Pasta— both are Ohio companies that ship nationally.

  20. Chiming in on the cats adapting well thread; my 18 year old kitty went blind from high blood pressure issues last spring, and she has adapted amazingly well. Animals don’t know or think about the long term implications of something; they just go “Someone turned all the lights off!” or “Huh, that paw doesn’t work anymore”.

    Give it a week and she’ll probably be back to 90% of her old self; she might have some trouble jumping up onto things or handling stairs at first, so make sure she’s got food / water / litterbox on each level of the house. If she’s anything like my cat you’re about to be trained in lifting the kitty up onto the sofa / bed / other preferred sleeping location in response to kitty meows (mine can get down just fine, but doesn’t like to jump up onto things she can’t see).

work fashion blog press mentions